be__crime
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Recent works
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standard communication by splice_of_life (be__crime)
Fandoms: Biohazard | Resident Evil (Gameverse)
12 May 2026
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Normal people didn’t get assigned federal agents like they were new lab partners. Then again, normal people didn’t apply for “civilian emotional support liaison,” either.
The waiting area was nice, at least. Plenty of plants, hung and potted, with some of the usual posters you saw in a therapist’s office. Though, this was a government facilitated rehabilitation program for freshly (re)traumatized government agents. The more you thought about it, the more you were curious as to why you were chosen in the first place.
Your new job is simple: provide a calm, stable home for a federal agent on mandatory leave. Be a friendly face. Make sure he remembers to eat.
The agent in question is Leon S. Kennedy: tired, jumpy, and treating your potted fern like a security threat. Your plan to help him relax involves cozy couches, terrible movies, and a truly excessive amount of takeout. It's foolproof!
(Now, if only you could convince him that the toaster isn't a covert listening device, you might actually get somewhere.)
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i assumed there was only room for my dreams in my dreams (so i'd sleep) by be__crime
Fandoms: 魔道祖师 - 墨香铜臭 | Módào Zǔshī - Mòxiāng Tóngxiù, 魔道祖师 | Módào Zǔshī (Cartoon), 陈情令 | The Untamed (TV)
06 Mar 2025
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It wasn't as though Xichen hadn't know what she was getting into; political marriages weren't rare, and someone had to make sure that her Wangji got the chance to marry for love. Even if it meant sacrificing her own, as elder sisters are expected to do.
She wishes they weren't such a poor match, with such clashing personalities.
Meanwhile, Mingjue would love her fiancée that impossibly little more if she actually said what she were thinking behind that pretty, perfectly diplomatic smile.
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sebastian, why does the expendable call you babygirl? by be__crime
Fandoms: Pressure (Roblox), Roblox (Video Game)
02 Nov 2024
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After getting arrested for petty theft, you never thought you'd ever get the chance at a new life. No money, no support, and not to mention your record was ruined.
Urbanshade's offer had seemed like a blessing sent from the heavens-- but you didn't know that you'd be closer to hell more than anything else. Now, deep in the Hadal zone with no communication and a bomb strapped around your neck, you're determined to keep your spirits relatively okay to keep your sanity levels from dropping.
Though, that doesn't mean you can't do your best to drive a certain someone else insane!
Series
- Part 1 of lol pressure like pressure the game
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Summary
You'd fallen down from the high of childhood dreams into a hell of your own making.
You took full responsibility, sure, but it was hard not to harbor hatred when your single slip up had gotten you shipped to maximum security, and then into the deepest trench in the North Sea.
Abandoned by everyone who you'd come down to the Blacksite with, you were convinced that the voice talking to you from the PA system was either a hallucination or a gift from a god that didn't exist.
Sure, it was rude and snappy and bipolar as fuck, but hey! Who wasn't? At least it shared your love of art!
Series
- Part 2 of lol pressure like pressure the game
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wei ying vs the lesbian agenda by be__crime for total_sapphic_disaster
Fandoms: 魔道祖师 - 墨香铜臭 | Módào Zǔshī - Mòxiāng Tóngxiù, 陈情令 | The Untamed (TV)
01 Aug 2024
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But like, speaking of that, Lan Zhan probably thought she was a lesbian.
Shit.
Well, technically, Wei Ying wasn't *gay* for her, she was just. Interested in her. In a non-gay way.
Right?
Right. But this was leading Lan Zhan on anyways, because she definitely thought she was gay and interested. And she'd be disappointed when she found out the truth. The smile she'd given Wei Ying when they'd met, the look of excitement when she'd asked Wei Ying out, Wei Ying couldn't just destroy that!
Wei Ying is very confident in her sexuality.
.. Or at least, she was, until her friends dragged her to a pride parade and the day after, the most beautiful woman she'd ever seen asks her out on a date!!?
Too embarrassed (and.. hesitant?) to tell her new, gorgeous date that she's 'straight' (she's not), Wei Ying decides to go with the flow. This includes many 'am i gay' quizzes, 'become lesbian' subliminals, and, eventually, some good ol' 'fake it til you make it' action.
Recent series
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lol pressure like pressure the game by be__crime
Fandom Pressure (Roblox), Roblox (Video Game)
02 Nov 2024
Summary
(series named by jet)
collection of my pressure fics that may or may not be in alternate universes of the same space-time continuum
babygirlverse (SWDTECYBG) -- sebastian/reader
(pain)ter 👍-- painter/reader (also named by jet)
- Words:
- 51,666
- Works:
- 2
- Bookmarks:
- 6
Recent bookmarks
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"September," he rasped, the Northeast lilt still making his skin crawl. "What day is it?"
He stumbled back into the main room, nearly tripping over a stack of discarded moving boxes. He found his wallet on the kitchen counter next to a pile of junk mail. Tucked inside was a pristine, un-creased RPD ID badge, and pinned on the fridge was a calendar—dog themed, with the current month being a golden retriever.
He looked closer.
September 19th, 1998.
The date hit him like a physical blow. He had five days. Three days before the water supply was contaminated, four days before the “Cannibal Flu” swept through the city. Five days before the city became a slaughterhouse. Five days before the T-Virus turned the people he was supposed to protect into the shambling dead. Five days before the blockades go up.
He looked at his RPD uniform hanging on the closet door, still encased in plastic. It looked like a joke. A Halloween costume for a boy who didn't know what a real monster looked like.
or: 3 idiots are transported back to the place that started it all with 30 years of trauma and 5 days to prevent it.
Bookmarked by splice_of_life (be__crime)
18 May 2026
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Tail, Claws and Guns by JokerThePotatoUwU
Fandoms: Biohazard | Resident Evil (Gameverse)
05 Apr 2026
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While going through the RPD, Crlos runs into a mutated rookie police officer who, despite his heavy mutations, still has his mind intact. Seeing an opportunity, he asks for help.
Leon, who had awoken from the worst nap in his life a few hours ago, only to find his own body was unrecognisable to him, runs into an Umbrella soldier and offers his help.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 6,824
- Chapters:
- 4/?
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 6
- Kudos:
- 150
- Bookmarks:
- 30
- Hits:
- 1,284
Bookmarked by splice_of_life (be__crime)
08 Apr 2026
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onward and upward by iguessyouregonnamissthepantyraid
Fandoms: Biohazard | Resident Evil (Gameverse)
12 Jun 2023
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Summary
“Who are you? And what are you doing here?”
What is—?
He’s…
He’s awake. He’s upright. The fire splitting his spine is entirely gone. Instead there’s a fist pressed against his chest nearly hard enough to bruise, keeping him pinned to the wall behind him.
And Leon Kennedy is glaring at him, eyes angry and distrusting—and cold, that’s the strange thing. Cold, as if Luis didn’t take his last breath before those very same eyes not thirty seconds ago.
(Or: Luis, in a time loop.)
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 41,712
- Chapters:
- 2/2
- Comments:
- 244
- Kudos:
- 3,792
- Bookmarks:
- 1,015
- Hits:
- 35,828
Bookmarked by be__crime
16 Dec 2025
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Summary
After the death of Meng Yao--of Jin Guangyao, the man he did not know--Lan Xichen secludes himself to grieve. His brother allows this for a time, and then reminds him that grief does not have to be shouldered alone.
Bookmarked by be__crime
25 Aug 2025
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Summary
“He’s hiding in my oven because of the economy?”
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Zhongli experiences some unintended side effects after he gives up his gnosis, and he ends up hiding in Childe's oven out of embarrassment. Also, to protect the value of the mora.
Despite his better judgment, Childe decides to make this his problem.
Bookmarked by be__crime
09 Jul 2025