annoy_like_the_wind



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  1. Public Bookmark 78

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    In March 2019, Caitlin Dykstra finds herself inside of Ilya Rozanov’s home carrying way too much food, some flu medicine, a few bottles of gatorade, and a hello.

    She leaves with more information than she could have ever wanted.

    (This is a side story to “Operation O Canada, or the Hollander-Rozanov Method of Soft Launching a Marriage.” Please read the original fic first!)

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    18 May 2026

  2. Public Bookmark *

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    “Can’t hang out tonight, Hayd. I have plans.”

    “Bullshit,” Hayden responds. “You never have plans.”

    Objectively, this used to be true. Nowadays Shane has many, many plans, between his nightly plans to look at Ilya’s penis through Skype and his various long-term plans laid out helpfully in his notebook, Canva (For Ilya’s sake. He is a visual learner), and more recently, Excel. Shane loves that excel sheet. He’s colour coded it.

     

    In 2017, Shane Hollander spirals and proposes to his boyfriend of 4 days (or 7 years, or 9 years, or not his boyfriend at all, depending on how you look at it), which leads to a lot of plans, weird theories in the Montreal Voyageur locker room, some Twitter drama, and Ilya Rozanov entering his WAG era.

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    17 May 2026

    Bookmarker's Notes

    God tier

  3. Public Bookmark *

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    Ilya is not going to steal Shane Hollander's dog. That would be illegal. And wrong. And someone would probably find out and make Ilya give him back.

    So. Not stealing.

    But there is nothing wrong with giving Chernysh all the pats and treats that he deserves, is there?

    Nothing wrong with encouraging Chernysh to spend more and more time at Ilya's house until he doesn't even remember who Hollander is.

    Because Hollander is stupid and boring and does not deserve a dog as good as Chernysh. No, he doesn't, does he? Because Chernysh is the best boy in the whole world, yes he is.

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    16 May 2026

  4. Public Bookmark *

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    While in search of a roommate, Ilya comes across an interesting Facebook Marketplace listing from Shane Hollander.

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    16 May 2026

  5. Public Bookmark *

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    Max stands, pacing again, and says, “I mean, what do I do? I can’t tell them I know now. It’s way too late for that.”

    “It’s really okay,” Troy says far too optimistically. “It’s not that big of a deal.”

    “Yeah, you can say that because you're not the one who heard Ilya tell Shane he misses his slutty little mouth."

    Or: The Centaurs' newest rookie speaks Russian. It's too bad that Shane and Ilya don't know that.

    Read in Russian here!

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    13 May 2026