CatInTheHat



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  1. Public Bookmark *

    The Merc with a Beak by

    Fandoms: Spider-Man - All Media Types, Deadpool - All Media Types  

    04 Aug 2026

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    Wade Wilson is the best merc in the business, and he knows it. When he crosses the wrong kind of withered old lady—the magic kind—she curses him to regret his cockiness in the most literal way possible: By turning him into a cock. A rooster. A male hen, of the chicken variety.

    Peter Parker, grieving the loss of Aunt May and Uncle Ben, needs a change. That's what his grief counselor says, anyway. So he makes an impulsive and massive one: He buys a farm. He doesn't mean for it to turn in a rescue for broken things, he just... he can't help but love the animals that no one else wants. Thus, when he overhears a greasy, crude asshole trying to pawn off a rooster in the middle of a farmer's market, he doesn't hesitate.

    But there's something wrong with this rooster. It doesn't crow at sunrise—which is the only thing Peter expects a rooster would do—but it does holler its tail off whenever Peter bends over. And it follows him around and clucks like it's talking to him. And it's weirdly good at killing the vermin around the house.

    There's a mystery afoot. Peter's going to get to the bottom of it.

    (The Beauty and the Beast!AU you never knew you needed.)

    Language:
    English
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    154,019
    Chapters:
    25/25
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    Bookmarked by CatInTheHat

    25 Aug 2026

  2. Public Bookmark *

    Brachial Pulse by

    Fandoms: Spider-Man: Spider-Verse (Sony Animated Movies), Spider-Man - All Media Types  

    04 May 2025

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    One second, Miguel is drafting a strongly worded email to a transcriptase vendor. The next, Lyla's dragging in some man who proceeds to throw Miguel's professional and personal life into a free fall.

    Peter's just a guidance counselor trying to give two of his students a positive life experience.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    142,816
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    25/25
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    Bookmarked by CatInTheHat

    24 Jul 2026

  3. Public Bookmark *

    it's all in my head but i want nonfiction by

    Fandoms: Deadpool (Movieverse), Deadpool - All Media Types, X-Men (Movieverse), X-Men - All Media Types  

    05 Jan 2025

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    “Happy new year,” Wade murmured, bright reflection from the TV glowing in Logan’s eyes.

    “Should we kiss?” Logan said back, somewhere in the cacophony of voices and clinking glasses.

    What?

    “What?” Wade gasped because what the fuck? What the actual fuck?

    “What?” Logan asked back, lurching backward a little, clearing his throat, “I just–I thought–sorry.”

    Sheepish, stuttering Logan was not on Wade’s twenty–twenty-five bingo card, but here he was anyway, nervous fingers trembling against Wade’s thigh for a moment before he took them away.

    Logan stood haphazardly, placing a warm hand on Wade’s shoulder for just a fraction of a second, “I can wait. Another time. How about a hug?”

    Wade nodded, standing and shoving his chair back, launching himself into Logan’s hold a bit eagerly for his own liking, but Logan really didn’t need to see the heat rising to his cheeks.

    “Happy new year, bub,” Logan whispered in his ear.

     

    (Somewhere between sharing a bed, fixing their sleep schedules, and settling into a daily routine, Logan and Wade start dating. Too bad Wade doesn't know that.)

    Language:
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    Bookmarked by CatInTheHat

    14 Apr 2026

  4. Public Bookmark *

    second nature to me now by

    Fandoms: Deadpool - All Media Types, Deadpool (Movieverse)  

    12 Oct 2024

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    "So," Wade says an hour or so later. "Hot gay DILFs are going missing from The Smokehouse and it's up to us to catch the DILFinator. The DILF crusher." He snaps his fingers. "The DILF Destroyer!"

    Lines deepen between Logan's eyebrows. "The fuck is a DILF?"

    "Dad I'd Like to Fuck," Wade chirps, "so, like, distressingly hot middle-aged men."

    Logan blinks. "Oh."

    (In which Logan and Wade are hired to catch a serial killer with very specific tastes.)

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    36,800
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    1/1
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    Bookmarked by CatInTheHat

    23 Feb 2026

  5. Public Bookmark *

    My Love is Easy by

    Fandoms: Deadpool - All Media Types, Deadpool (Movieverse), X-Men - All Media Types, Deadpool and Wolverine - Fandom  

    30 Nov 2025

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    Summary

    Logan panted, “You’re an alpha.”

    “Sorry, didn’t quite catch that; I was chewing.” He wasn’t. “Are you talking about a podcast or a documentary? And also… why?”

    “You don’t know? You can’t tell?” Logan demanded, his hysteria thinly veiled.

    “Know what? About alpha dude-bros?” Wade asked, voice rising with his own poorly concealed panic. “You know, usually, I can tell when someone gives off those vibes, but I’m kinda getting mixed signals here. Are you calling me an alpha-male?”

    “Yes?” Logan said, almost desperately.

    “Cool. Cool. Cool. Okay. So, why don’t you tell me what you think that means? I’ve read way too much fan fiction to react accordingly to that.”
    ...

    Or, When Logan discovers that secondary genders don’t exist in Wade’s universe, he can finally relax after centuries of omega hate. Things get complicated when Wade starts displaying signs of an alpha and Logan secrets risk getting exposed.

    Series
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    Bookmarked by CatInTheHat

    30 Nov 2025