Chapter Text
Past
"The Raven"
///
"I want you to want me. I need you to need me.
I'd love you to love me, I'm begging you to beg me."
I Want You to Want Me - Cheap Trick
///
I did not go back to Iago Tower. I did not see Isaac.
The only proof of life I had was seeing his lights on in the tower Thursday night. He made no effort to reconnect with me, and I held firm in my resolve, although it stung to do so.
Gomez had conveyed the sensitive information to Morticia, and with her well aware of the circumstances, she had whisked me away with her earlier today at the same time I usually would have gone to help Isaac, a wicked smile on her red lips as she led the way down hallways until we wound up in the auditorium theater.
"What are we doing here?" I asked, my voice echoing in the big space. She jogged up the stage steps, gesturing for me to follow. Her heeled boots clicked against the wood floor as she crossed to the other side, ducking behind the long red velvet curtains to the backstage. I follow after, taking a moment for my eyes to adjust to the darkness behind the curtain, illuminated only by the red glow of an exit sign. A booming click came from my right, and then the backstage lights came on.
I was standing in the prop hall, but at the back of the room, where Morticia was already heading, I could see mannequin heads on a shelf with various wigs and rack after rack of costumes.
"Come on," Morticia called, and I caught up to her as she pulled out a rolling metal rack.
"Why?"
She looked at me, blinking like it was obvious. "Well, you only just decided you were going to the Rave'n, so you'll need a dress."
I raise my brows, but watch in silence as she pulls out different garment bags, peeking inside and skewing her mouth in thought as she works down the rack, looking for something that would look nice.
"... So, you think that the optimal dress for the dance is a Dorothy Gale costume?" I ask, wrinkling my nose as I peek into the nearest garment bag at the blue gingham dress that smelled like a few decades of students had sweat through it.
"No. Certainly not. Not that shade of blue, anyway." Morticia looked through a few more. "Oh, here, look at this one."
She pulled out a deep emerald green velvet gown with gold accents. At first glance, I thought it was beautiful, but upon closer inspection, I could see it was being held together with a prayer and a few straining threads. One too many previous wearers had pushed it past its limits. I lifted one limp sleeve to show Morticia, and she frowned, immediately putting it away. "Perhaps not."
She rummaged through a few more, murmuring to herself as she examined them. Curious to explore the options, I peeked into a few bags, too, to be met with gaudy silk gowns with big flowers that looked like a pre-teen's Halloween costume. "I don't know that any of these are exactly dance attire." I objected with an air of concern after we had pillaged half the collection.
"There has to be something here that will work; many of them are just repurposed prom dresses."
"From which decade?" I wonder, pulling out a long, burnt-orange corduroy dress from the 70's with shoulder pads and a flared collar.
Morticia hummed her disappointment as she rifled through bag after bag, yanking squealing hangers across the rack to inspect their contents.
I wandered from the immediate area, another rack partially obscured by a long black curtain caught my eye. Tugging it over revealed seven more garment bags overfilled with organza, tulle, chiffon, and lace, and already looking far more promising than our previous efforts.
Feeling optimistic that these would at least be fuller dresses, I unzip the first one, wrestling down the apricot-colored layers of the skirt before I could get a look at the bodice. I exhale a breath of wonder and relief at the sight of it, that it was somewhat normal and acceptable as a formal dress. A deep plunging neckline that dropped just below sternum level, cups composed of delicately layered tulle moving in vertical lines to the waist where it flared out in a layered long skirt of tiered scalloped eyelet lace and pearl beads. I run my fingertips against the thin, sheer straps, overlaid with a transparent tulle embroidered with small white flowers that cover the whole gown.
"I hadn't thought of that one, it's an extra from the Swan Lake production two years ago. They did not get around to altering the skirt for ballet." Morticia appeared over my shoulder. I look back at her, and she nods her approval.
I check the tag, raising my brows in surprise. "It's my size."
"Well, try it on, see what you think." Morticia encouraged, dragging out one of the rolling privacy dividers. I gather the dress as best as I can into my arms, a wad of tulle and chiffon balled up in my grip, while I pack it blindly behind the divider. Morticia took her seat in a director's chair, waiting patiently for the big reveal.
I pull the dress over my head, fighting the layers to try to get them into some semblance of order. Breathless but finally in the thing, I fumble for the zipper.
"Did you get it on?" Morticia called out after a few minutes of grunt-filled struggling.
"I- I think so!" I call back, straining my fingers in search of the zip before sighing in defeat. "I think I'll need help with the zipper."
I stepped out from behind the divider, having not seen my own reflection yet; my only indication of how it looked was Morticia raising her brows in surprise.
"Is it that bad?" I fret, looking down to smooth the skirt. She shook her head quickly, "No, no, not at all. It could use a good steaming, but it suits you well."
"Really?" I look down at it. While it wasn't a color I usually would have picked for myself, I couldn't bring myself to dislike it. Morticia got up from her seat, dragging out a rolling full-length mirror for me to see. "Don't look yet." She warned, and I averted my eyes until she walked behind me and tugged up the zip. "Okay, now look."
I lift my eyes to my reflection. While my hair is still ratty from a busy day of classes, the dress made up for it. I shift slightly left to right, admiring the elegant flow of the skirt, the soft rustling of the fabric, and how it fits perfectly.
"Well, Isaac or no Isaac," Morticia sighs, resting her chin on my shoulder to look at our reflection, "You will look lovely. Not a color I would have personally gone with, though..." She cracked, red lips curving into a smirk.
"Of course not," I agreed adamantly, looking down at the black lace bell sleeve of her top. "You in a champagne peach? Never."
She laughed, busying her hands with straightening the layers of tulle while I looked back at my reflection. Taking a deep breath, I straighten my shoulders, reaching up to fluff my hair, trying to imagine how I would style it. A surge of nervous excitement shot through me at the silly concept of getting to dress up for the night, and whatever ventures would come with the experience.
///
By Friday, there had still been no sign of Isaac. He skipped the classes we shared, and I did not see him around. Gomez swore he hadn't said anything to him as I had asked, but I had my doubts when I never saw him skipping arm in arm with Gomez again after Wednesday night. Gomez seemed troubled when I saw him at lunch, but when prodded, he gave one of his classic grins and was right as rain once more.
Classes wrapped early today after lunch, freeing the student body to get ready for the evening's festivities.
I began getting ready for the dance at two, taking my time to put myself together, reminding myself that I had no one to impress and to just have fun. It'd be a new experience, and that in itself was exciting, but I could not push down my disappointment because I had really wanted it to be him that I went with.
Dottie and Blaize had congregated elsewhere to get ready, leaving me to the freedom of playing my radio station in the background as I got ready. The Cure's Lovesong came on, and my hands paused their task of applying glitter eyeshadow to my eyelids. I met my gaze in the mirror, but felt miles away. The lyrics, "I will always love you" stuck in my mind, I wondered for a moment if I would love him forever? Would it be the crush that never went away, no matter how much time spent apart, or who else came and went through my life? I frown, worried that loving him could prove to be a curse.
The girls burst through the door at two-thirty to collect their dresses. Blaize gave me a side eye as she went out the door. Dottie hesitated at the threshold, peeking back in. "I'm glad you're going tonight," She offered optimistically. "I hope you have a good time."
"Thanks," I reply earnestly when I do not pick up on any suspicion of an oncoming Carrie situation from her tone. She pursed her lips and nodded before leaving. Between my two roommates, Dottie had been the only one to pay me any mind. "You, too."
She shut the door behind her, and excited footfalls ran down the hall to whoever's room they were gathering in. I wondered for a moment if I should have gone to get ready with Morticia and Larissa, or Francoise? A night that is so heavily focused on the community shared by students, yet I found myself alone, sitting in front of my vanity. I smudge more glitter on my eyelids, reaching for my eyeliner.
I periodically steal glances out the window at the tower, looking for a change or a sign. I frowned deeply when I saw him from afar, up on the roof, fiddling with his lightning rod. My heart lunged in my ribs, and my first instinct was to go to him, to scold him for being careless after the incident last time, but I was reminded yet again that he wasn't mine to be worried with. Isaac would do what he wanted, whether or not I was there.
By three, I could see the darkness forming on the western horizon as promised. I observed its slow crawl towards Jericho, and every few minutes, I'd look back out to watch the approach of the storm and to look up at the tower, wondering if, against all odds and all things Isaac, he'd show up anyway. My heart sank every time I looked up at the clock face to see the hands moving ever forward, the illumination of his work lamps on inside, and the gnawing inside me that I might have made the wrong choice.
The experiment is incredibly important to this project. What if it did not work out because I was not there? I shake my head, banishing the thought immediately. Isaac is a DaVinci; he'd been excelling at this type of thing well before I arrived, and he'd be fine without me tonight and going forward.
As I opened my blush compact, the thought occurred to me that I wanted to be there, too. I wanted to see his work pay off; I wanted to see a look of relief on his face when something finally went according to plan. But what good would that do me in the long run if I keep coming back only to be banished again in two weeks when we suffer another skiff?
I lowered my shoulders in resignation, releasing a soft sigh as I accepted my reality of the evening. I'd be going to the dance alone, he'd be in his tower, and going forward, distance would be required. It is no good for either one of us to be in this repetitive cycle of push and pull. We've been doing it for almost two months now, and I am exhausted.
When I looked out the window again, the deep blue clouds were beginning to converge high in the sky. A tempest, Isaac had called it. The clouds rolled with slow, hefty assurance, tumbling over themselves high up where the peaks were still white and beginning to block out the light. Still quite a ways off, I'd guess we had at least an hour before it made it to Jericho.
I pull on the dress, reaching behind myself to get the zipper as high as possible on my own before turning to face my reflection. Hair still not finished, but I looked and felt like a completely different person, which felt reassuring in the circumstances where being Priscilla Watts was proving to be an exhausting affair. I lean over the vanity seat, pulling my dark hair forward to let the waves frame my face, smudging an eyeliner stain off my cheek, and staring into my eyes. Something is missing.
Straightening up, I turn from the left to the right, trying to determine what was needed to pull it all together. I became aware of how vacant the expanse of skin from my collarbone to sternum looked; it needed a necklace. And I know exactly which one...
I pick up the orb carefully, holding it in my palm a moment to admire it again. Only this time, I noticed that it is warm. It had always maintained a persistent chill before; no matter how long I held it against my skin or around my neck, it had been cold. But now, it radiated a soft, almost imperceptible warmth that piqued my curiosity. I immediately wanted to rush to the tower to show Isaac, to ask him about it, but the roadblocks came up, and I frowned, remembering that I could not do that.
I hang the pendant around my neck quickly, standing back to take in the mostly finished appearance, smiling in satisfaction to myself. This would do.
Curling soft waves into my hair, I struggled with it more than any other part of my getting ready, and it was four by the time I had donned my heels and was hoofing it down the hall in a half-zipped dress, searching for able-bodied hands to zip me in. Meanwhile, the storm outside only grew darker and bigger, claiming more and more of the horizon as it got closer.
Stumbling down the steps to where the stairs of the two dorms converged, I paused on the landing as Caspian came down the other side, looking sharp in a deep navy suit with a matching waistcoat, embroidered with a dark filigree pattern. His eyes lit up when he saw me, and his pace down the steps quickened.
"Sila!" He greeted me warmly, his usual self. "You look..." He trailed off, eyes running appreciatively in a quick sweep before settling on my eyes again with a kind smile. "Absolutely stunning."
"Thanks, Cass," I smile, looking down, feeling a rush of embarrassment in my cheeks. "Not bad yourself, wolf boy."
His smile spread into a full grin. "I try." He spreads his arms at his sides, turning in a small, slow circle to show off the subtle detailing in his jacket. I laugh, nodding, "Very nice."
"Thank you." He gave a little bow.
"Oh- Hey, would you mind zipping up my dress for me? I couldn't get it myself. I was hoping to catch Morticia, but I think she's already gone."
"Of course." He straightened his shoulders, taking on a very serious, polite stance as I turned to face away from him. He made quick work of the zipper, tugging it up and brushing my hair back over it. "You're good."
"Thanks."
He paused a moment once I'd turned back to look at him, some internal thought process going on in his mind. "Hey- I... Would you... Want to go with me to the dance? I don't mean as a date, of course. But like, I can escort you there-" He began rambling, using his hands to explain while his face lost its usual pallid color in favor of a subtle pink along the ridges of his cheekbones.
"Sure. Thanks, Caspian."
He held out his elbow towards me, and I hooked my arm through his. We made our way down the stairs while my mind was whirling, both delighted and overwhelmed by the experience of being arm-in-arm with anyone. Selfishly, I wondered what it would have felt like if it were Isaac, but I am glad to go with Caspian. He makes every awkward moment better, turning would-be embarrassment to amusement easily, and never acknowledging where I had fallen short. And I know I have many times in his presence.
He had his work cut out for him as we crossed the courtyard, the uneven cobblestone was proving deadly for me in heels and a dress where I could not see my feet. I stubbed my toe twice, and he chuckled quietly. "You good?"
"I'm alright," I stressed, feigning a smile and pushing on while my big left toe throbbed.
Before tucking under the big stone arch into the event hall, I threw one last glance back over my shoulder at Iago Tower as the first rumble of thunder started.
Isaac
Sparks burst off the copper connection points as Isaac carefully plugged in each connector to the lightning rod. Still a bit windswept from his recent venture up onto the rooftop to make sure everything was good, he exhaled a weary breath, tugging on it to ensure that it would hold.
Climbing back down the series of ladders to the ground floor, he took time and care at each landing to inspect the copper coil running down to the platform where he had set up the groundwork for his experiment. He checked carefully, his mind miles away as he felt down the cables for fraying or damage. This was weeks in the making; he could not afford to have the whole test go awry just because of some damaged cords. The work kept his hands and mind busy enough that it was a while before his most recent heartache made itself known again when he reached the ground floor and noticed the oil canister still sitting on the desk from the other night.
Frowning, he commanded it with his powers back to the locker by the door, pushing hair off his forehead and exhaling a stressed groan. He pivoted, looking up into the high rafters of the clock towers for one last inspection, while his mind revolted against him, wondering what Sila would say about this experiment.
Forcing himself to focus, he marched across the room to the west-facing windows, looking out towards Jericho, where the darkness was coagulating overhead like a blood clot. He rubbed his hands together anxiously, heart cranking louder as he watched the slow roll of darkness coming over the town.
He made arrangements, triple-checking every detail, making sure everything would be ready. Flicking on the radio with his DaVinci hand, he listened absently to the weather broadcast in the background while he inspected the power orb and ensured that it was properly installed on its charging pedestal.
When at last everything was as ready as it could ever be, it left him in the still silence of the lab, listening to the creaking of the tower as the wind began to pick up. He repeatedly checked the west window to observe the progress of the storm, checking the time on a pocket watch, he counted the seconds, and scribbled down data. From this distance, it looked like the storm would be settling directly over Jericho within the next forty-five minutes.
Isaac ground his teeth as he watched the forming storm, unable to banish what was gnawing at him any longer. Gomez had made some good points about his relationship with Sila, but they had fallen on deaf ears. Isaac had already stubbornly settled himself into his plan of self-destruction long before Gomez had even arrived to talk him out of it.
All that was left now was to go through with it.
Sila
The event hall was loud, dark, and a flurry of energy and movement. I had to stop just inside the door to take it all in. The colors, the lights, the chandeliers draped in tulle, arcing across the room. Music played loudly, and kids danced in the middle of the room in strobing light. The outer circle was lined with tables, chairs, ice sculptures, and a long buffet table complete with a punch bowl.
"What do you think?" Caspian nudged me. I looked up at him as he flashed a bright smile, straightening his shoulders confidently.
"Wow..." I breathe, looking around, "The decorating committee had their work cut out for them." He led us in, walking the outer edge of the dance floor. I try to take in everything in the dim light, but there is so much to see. The windows had been blacked out, all but the big stained glass one at the west end of the hall, which allowed a blurry kaleidoscope view of the storm. I could feel the vibration of the bass in my bones as we walked past speakers, a song I did not know, but it did a good job of setting the tone.
Caspian led the way through the dense gathering of bodies, acting as a cowcatcher to clear a path for me to follow after him. My arm slipped from his elbow to his hand, where he held it firmly in his.
He leads us towards a big round table in the back corner of the room where Morticia, Gomez, and Larissa already sit. Morticia nodded her approval at the coupling while Larissa cocked her head curiously, then smiled.
"Welcome! Would you two like to join us?" Gomez asked, hurriedly getting up to pull out a seat for each of us at their table.
"Wait! Pictures first!"
A flash blinded us both, leaving us seeing stars while all I could hear was Francoise's unmistakable laugh until my eyes cleared enough that I could see her. She beamed, holding an old-fashioned camera. She had her crazed hair styled back beautifully, while wearing the dress she had told me all about. It made her look very classy, and very tall. For a moment, she reminded me so much of her mom. She straightened her shoulders, grinning at me. "You made it!"
She threw her arms around me before I had even fully recovered from the camera's flash, still seeing rainbow-colored orbs in my vision that I tried to blink away. "I'm sorry that my brother is an idiot," She whispers in my ear before pulling back to give me a softer smile. "I'm glad that you came anyway."
"Me, too."
We sat at the table with Morticia, Gomez, Francoise, and Larissa. The music was loud and overwhelming, too loud to speak to each other across the table, so I let my eyes wander across the crowd, observing the faces, the dresses, the suits... My gaze kept coming back to the doorway, waiting for Isaac to come through.
I wondered what he would look like if he came. Would he clean up, look as sharp as he does in class, or would he arrive disheveled from his hours in the tower, having only just decided to come at the last moment? I tried to envision him trading his nice school uniform for a tux. Having never seen him in anything other than sweaters, vests, and button-downs, it was hard to imagine him wearing something really classy and sharp.
A nudge pushed against my arm, and I looked over at Caspian, who offered a sympathetic smile. I wondered how much he knew, or how much he assumed. Either way, he wouldn't have been wrong.
"You good?" He called just loud enough to be heard over the music.
"Yeah, I'm good," I nod, knowing how unconvincing I must be. I offered a smile that felt tight on my cheeks. I had wanted to be here; I wanted the experience. But now that I was here, all I wanted was to be back in the tower. Guilt picked at me like tugging stray threads. My previous anger and stubbornness that had driven me here originally were steadily dissipating, leaving me feeling perplexed.
"You're somewhere else tonight," He observed, and I wince apologetically. "Is it that obvious?"
"A bit," He admitted, suppressing a smile of amusement instead of getting upset. Every time I thought I had him figured out, he would surprise me again.
"Night sucks," Captain lowered his voice conspicuously, eyes scanning for would-be eavesdroppers before they returned to mine, the same deep brown as Isaac's, while also being incredibly different. "I am sorry he makes you feel like this."
I smile softly, appreciative of the comment, but both saddened and sorry that Caspian saw me in a way that I could not reciprocate, and I couldn't seem to push past Isaac to appreciate him as he deserved. He had been nothing but kind and considerate of me since we'd met, and I had been dismissive, distant, and undeserving of his kindness. "Thanks, Cass," I say sincerely. "I am sorry."
His brows pinched together in confusion. "Sorry? For what?"
"How I have been toward you-"
He shook his head quickly, banishing the conversation. "No, no, I told you. I wanted you to be with whom you wanted. There are no hurt feelings, and I don't want you to feel pressured to reciprocate mine." He exhaled a dreamy breath as he leaned back in his chair a bit. "Just know, I've got you if you ever need me."
I picked up on the double meaning. While he had said, "If you ever need me," I sensed that what he really meant was "If you ever want me," and I felt much crueler.
My heart tightened at his sincerity, and I searched his eyes, finding no trace of ill intention in them. Pure-hearted and good through and through, Caspian had been up front with me from the beginning. And based on everything I knew about him, he was the obvious choice. He had many qualities that made him a beautiful person inside and out, yet... I could not get past that stupid man in the tower, who, for some reason, my heart had taken up a particular affection for that I could not shake, no matter how deeply I looked in Caspian's eyes, wishing that I could change my mind.
While I love Caspian, the adoration I have for him is very different from the one I have for Isaac, and I could not determine if it was some soulmates level of destiny that had convinced me of that fact, or just pure hormones. I sigh softly, looking away for something to distract myself with.
My gaze settled on Judi Stonehearst. I almost did not recognize her because of how different she looked. She hadn't dressed like a fifteen-year-old, but more like a young adult. She wore a long, navy blue form-fitting gown with glitter that caught the light. Her brown hair swept back and pinned. She had put on eyeliner and nail polish and managed to look older than any of us here.
She was wallflowering, eyes scanning the crowd. I watched her, wondering if it was Isaac she was looking for. Finally, her gaze found mine, narrowing when she saw that the person who sat beside me was not him. Then a slight, almost imperceptible shift in her expression changed. She walked away immediately, squeezing through the crowd until she was out of sight. I watched her go, wondering what she had up her sleeve this time.
The song changed to an upbeat tune carried by a melodic piano line. Caspian gasped beside me, "I love this song."
"Want to dance?" I offered with a giggle, and his eyes widened in delight. He wasted no time, and was out of his seat in an instant, dragging my chair back and grabbing my hand. He hauled us out into the middle of the dance floor.
"Fair warning, I have little to no dancing experience," I say awkwardly. I considered doing the ol fake it til you make it, but decided that communicating my failure before it could happen was probably a better choice.
"Lucky for you, I got second place in my old school's talent show for a dance routine." He flashed his teeth, "I won't let you embarrass yourself."
"Gee, thanks," I shake my head, smiling as he steps back from me and extends his hand toward me in a proper invitation. I took his, and he pulled me close to him, but not so close that it took away the bubble of personal space. He was mindful and gentlemanly when he could have taken advantage of the circumstances. Another reason on the ever-growing list of reasons why Caspian was the ideal man.
I hid my inner frustrations, focusing on the moment we were in, banishing Isaac from my mind to pay my undivided attention to my unofficial date. Unfamiliar with dancing styles, the best I could guess was that it was some kind of waltz. He shifted us to steps in, two steps back, shuffling in perfect time to the beat while I tripped over my feet trying to match his choreographed step pattern. He chuckled softly, eyes twinkling in private joy when I met his gaze. I could feel my cheeks reddening.
"Oh, come on, don't be embarrassed!" He laughed as he attempted to spin me out, catching my fingers around the curve between his thumb and index fingers before pulling me back into his side. A swift, smooth maneuver of steps on his part flawlessly put him back on my right side again after I'd messed up where I was supposed to go. "I promise you, I embarrassed myself enough at my first dance for the both of us."
"People are watching," I laugh nervously, stealing a glance at the eyes around us, trying not to let it bother me enough to lose my nerve.
"Don't mind them," He insisted, grabbing both of my hands in each of his. "This is the pretzel."
I nod once, swallowing hard, bracing myself for whatever he has in mind. He rotated away from me, reaching one arm behind his back. I pause, unsure what to do until he shook his hand at me, "Grab my hand." I did so, and once he had both my hands ensnared in his, he tugged me through a series of loops where at times his arms were going over my head, and sometimes mine over his, though he had to lower himself a bit to give me the clearance. I just followed wherever his hands directed, knowing that the second I tried to take back any kind of autonomy in the dance, we'd both fumble. He seemed to know what he was doing, and I'd let him have this.
I could feel my face getting red with embarrassment as he tried to do it back in reverse, and I almost tripped over my feet while stepping backward. The tulle of the skirt caught under my heel, but he caught my arm before I crashed and burned. "You're good," He encouraged with a smile, "Follow through, keep going!"
Once we were back in the starting position, he beamed proudly, "See? You did just fine."
It's strange seeing Caspian's contrast to Isaac. Caspian had always reminded me of a golden retriever. Bright, glowy, and eager to please and praise. Nothing upset him; every day in his eyes was a sunny one. Isaac, on the other hand, reveled in mildew-scented shadows, cold, sterile movement, and lack of any tenderness. As bleak as a machine, everything he did was very methodical. No whimsy, no wonder.
I couldn't help but wonder if he missed loving life, cherishing the color of flower petals, or looking for shapes in the clouds. Smelling freshly-cut blades of grass, or dipping his bare feet in a cold stream. Did he have any connection to or appreciation at all for the simple things? Or did everything in his life require a motive and a purpose?
"Wanna try it again?" He asked, leaving it up to me. I hesitate a moment, then nod. It couldn't be worse the second time. He went through the same movements as before, only this time I had an idea what to look out for. I grabbed his hand when he held it behind his back, and I laughed in exhilaration when he pulled me through the loop, beginning to feel like I was getting into a sort of rhythm.
After that, we were unstoppable. Caspian's laughter and smiles were infectious, luring the same from me as we got into a pattern. Faster and faster, I got my footing and was able to keep up with his movements. He'd spin me out, pull me back in, a blur of movement while somehow never colliding with other dancers on the floor or dropping me. He always respected the gap between us, no matter how hectic things got.
When the song ended, we were both out of breath and laughing too hard to catch it. He guided us back to the table where I sat down with drunken joy beside Larissa. "I will go get some punch." Caspian vowed diligently before disappearing into the crowd.
I was still coming down from the high when Larissa turned to me, eyeing me observantly. "Are you having a good time?"
"Yes," I answer breathlessly with a nod. She smiles and bows her head in acknowledgement. "Good. I am glad. How did the asking go?..."
I drop my shoulders a bit, shifting in my seat, and scan the room for something to distract myself. "Well," I sigh, "He said no. Then we quarrelled over it, so now we are at odds again. Caspian offered to escort me here, but I didn't expect him to mind after me as he has been." I frown, then lean in closer and lower my voice. "I'm very confused. Caspian is as forward as I wish Isaac would be. Caspian leads the way, initiates, but always respects boundaries, while Isaac is so-" I ball up my fingers, trying to think of a word potent enough to portray his stubbornness. "Oblivious? Or arrogant, I don't know."
"Are you shifting gears?" Larissa wondered curiously, raising her brows and smirking knowingly at me before peeking around and leaning in closer. I shake my head quickly. "No. No... I'm done with romance for the time being. I think it would be best for all involved if I take a break now while I am ahead."
My gaze caught on Caspian across the room, chatting with a classmate by the punch bowl. I let my eyes stay on him, taking a moment to really appreciate him, trying to determine if legitimate feelings could eventually form there if I tried hard enough. I felt the friendly adoration for sure, but nothing akin to love just yet. I drop my eyes, looking away.
"Well, just enjoy the night," Larissa encourages with a pat to my knee. "These young years go so quickly, you have the rest of your life to look for someone to share it with."
I laugh nervously when her words embedded themselves too seriously in my mind, and I started to imagine anyone wanting to marry me. I could not fathom it. Isaac popped back in my mind, a vision of him smiling, ring in hand, wanting to be lab partners for life-
"Are you okay?" Larissa asked softly, and I blinked. "Yes."
"You are red as a tomato," She observed with a curious narrowing of her eyes. "What are you daydreaming about?"
Caspian returned just in time, passing me the small plastic cup of blood red punch. "Got it just in time. There were some giddy guys waiting for Mrs. Bane to look away so they could spike it."
He dropped back into his seat on my left dutifully, sipping his punch and turning to keep up friendly conversation with Gomez.
Before Larissa could repeat her question, a boy came up to her, a senior I'd seen around but never talked to, asking her to dance. She was stunned for a moment as she reached for his hand with her silken-gloved one. As he led her out to the floor, she threw a look back over her shoulder at me, making a giddy expression. I laugh and smile, holding up an encouraging thumbs up.
Isaac
Thunder boomed outside, rattling the glass in the windows. Isaac stood at the western clock face, hands behind his back while he observed the turning tide of the clouds overhead. Everything was in place; all that was left to do now was wait.
He had wondered for a time about the safety of drawing a lightning strike to the middle of campus, but ultimately determined that he had laid the groundwork for it to go flawlessly. He had left no room for error. Of this, he was confident.
The radio droned on in the background. Between rock songs, a weather advisory update came, and he listened intently, tracking the time on his watch and marking up his notes. Even with his telekinesis, he missed having someone to do the note-taking for him while he focused on data collection, observation, and timing. He was no stranger to handling all his own tasks; he had handled them proficiently for years before Sila arrived. But it had alleviated his workload more than he cared to admit to have someone else handle that burden, and the absence of it weighed on him now.
He crossed the room to the opposite side, looking out the eastern clock face. Not that the storm held any interest on this side, no, he observed the birds-eye view of the event hall where the Rave'n was being held. Through the blurry glass, he could make out figures milling inside the doorway in an assortment of colored gowns. He undid the latch for the side window, pushing open the small panel to poke his head out and watch with clarity.
The increasing wind whipped his curls, and he squinted as he studied the students, arms attached to their dates. He did not see her among them and wondered selfishly if she had decided not to go after all. He hoped so. At least, until he realized where she might be otherwise if not at the dance. In her dorm alone, maybe she'd gone home for the weekend to her mother's house. Or, maybe she was out walking the woods as the ominous dark rolled in, and that thought tightened the springs of his heart and found himself feeling a bit pent up over the idea out there while a danger lurked above.
His concern came to an end when the pulleys of the elevator began to squeal. He spun back from the window, rushing forward three steps to watch with bated breath to see who it would be. He braced himself to see Sila, rising from the darkness, glaring at him between the bars. But who arrived on the platform was quite the opposite.
When the elevator stopped, the young Judi Stonehearst met his gaze with an arrogant confidence. He lowered his shoulders in disappointment, his body language giving him away before he became uncomfortably rigid as she stepped out into his space. She smiled at him partially before it slipped into a satisfied smirk.
"What is it, Judi? What do you want?" He frowned, dissatisfied with her unwelcome presence. He walked away, returning to his work.
"I knew you would wait for me." She spoke up from behind him, but he was too distracted in the moment to immediately process what she had said until a second had passed. He looked back over his shoulder, brows pulling together. "What?"
She came closer, heels clicking against the wood, and he observed that she had taken a detour from her usual girly-teen style in favor of something more grown-up. How her father signed off on her dress choice alone baffled him.
"You waited for me." She repeated, breathing the words as a smile of wonder graced her lips. Still confused, he narrowed his eyes.
"Waited for you? Waited for you to do what?"
She shook her head, coming closer, a dreamy smile on her face. "I knew the second I saw Sila at the dance with Caspian that her plans had fallen through, and I knew to come to you immediately because you would be here, waiting for me, like I knew you would be. Like a true gentleman."
Isaac winced uncomfortably. A stranger to receiving any kind of romantic proclamation, her delivery did not have quite the same effect on him that Sila's had. Hers had been sweet, thoughtful, and without pressure, while Judi had arrived with her head in the clouds and her mind filled with whatever delusions she had convinced herself of. The sound of her words was grating and hard on the ears.
"But then I saw her dance with Caspian and I realized she had no feelings for you at all."
Isaac stopped what he was doing, hands freezing over his work while her words settled in, fingers twitching involuntarily in response.
"So now, we can be honest with each other."
He spun around to glare at her, but she was unfazed. So thoroughly ensnared in her fantasies that he wondered if she were capable of logical thinking at all. Several replies came to his lips, tumbling over themselves in a rush, but instead of replying, he locked his jaw and glared down at her.
"She left you here tonight for the dance." Judi reminded him severely, stepping closer. "To go to Caspian when you shut her down. She doesn't want you, so it's okay now."
He narrowed his eyes, growing more tense with each step she took towards him until she stood directly in front of him. Two inches shorter than Sila, the top of her head barely cleared his collarbone, making him feel like he was staring down at a toddler. She reached out for him, eyes big and staring longingly at him under curled, mascara-caked lashes. Her palms barely brushed against his arms before he tore from her grip.
Scoffing his disgust, Isaac put down a few feet of distance between them. "What the hell is wrong with you? You have lost your mind."
"Why are you still keeping up this act-" She hissed, getting upset now.
He shook his head adamantly, "I didn't say yes to Sila because I cannot fathom wasting a moment of time in that hellscape," He corrected firmly, "Not because I care about you. Oh, that's a laugh."
The bitter sarcasm dripped from his voice like venom. His eyes darkened, fixing on her face with an intense disgust he reserved only for people who proved themselves to be particular pests.
"Allow me to clear up some misconceptions here, Judi, because you seem to be getting confused." His tone patronizing, he straightened his shoulders, "I am not waiting for you. There is no act. If you disappeared tomorrow, I would not mourn you. I don't care what you do, what you think; I do not care about you."
Her eyes gave up her disappointment first before she reeled it in on a tight leash. "Isaac, come on," She persisted, coming closer, and he instinctively took another step back. "We are alone now, no reason to keep up the tough guy show. No one is around to see it."
His eyes flashed with irritation. "Judi-" He stressed her name with a vicious grit, "There is no theatrics. Let me be so painstakingly clear with you for the absolute last time. I don't want anything to do with you, because I DO. NOT. LIKE. YOU. You are abhorrent in my sight."
He stressed each syllable, searching her eyes like a madman for the sign that the message had been delivered and received. She stared up into his eyes, brows pulling together in confusion and hurt that only lasted but a moment before shifting into something darker as anger took over.
"If Sila disappeared tomorrow, would you mourn her?" She asked harshly. His expression betrayed no sentimentality, and he did not answer. Instead, he turned and began walking away, back to the window to study. Shaking her head angrily, she persisted. "Perhaps you have forgotten your arrangement with my dad-" She snapped at him as he walked away. Skidding to a halt, Isaac spun back, pointing at her.
"I agreed to the terms that I give you whatever outcast ability you wanted in exchange for your father's funding of the project and access to his resources. At no point did I agree to date you, spend time with you, or even tolerate you. I am done being blackmailed into submission by you. I would not date you if I had free will, what makes you think I'd do it when coerced?!"
She glared at him.
"Not only that, but you are younger than my sister! Why in the hell do you think I would want to date a child?" Isaac wrinkled his nose in disgust, but the burning hatred that flared in his eyes just by looking at her did the damage.
"I am mature for my age!" She argues, stepping closer. "And when given the chance, I promise you, I could be a better lab partner than Sila! At least I know what you are talking about!" She gestured around. "Can Sila name any piece of equipment in this room? Can she help you develop hypotheses and conduct tests on the LOIS project? At best, she'd make a good normie test subject for it!"
Isaac curled his fingers angrily.
"I could help you make real progress," She begged, stepping closer to him. "What has she been helping you with, anyway? Sitting around as eye candy? I can actually help you."
"You say you're mature, but your only skill is childish manipulation to get your way," He seethed, "I have no need for you Judi. I need you to leave."
He turned on his heel, stomping away from her to the window, flipping through his notebook hurriedly, trying to catch up to speed on where he had left off. "You have chosen the worst possible time to show up and make these demands. I am very busy right now, and in no position to have this discussion with you."
"I can help you. Tell me what you need me to do." She asserted, marching forward confidently despite the damage done to her ego. "I can do what Sila does. If she can do it, how hard can it be? Tell me what you need from me."
"I need you to be gone." Isaac snapped at her, giving her a pointed side eye. He had no time to be fighting her teenage girl emotions while something so important was on the line. How had he managed to get so unlucky as to have not one, but two emotional girls mad at him and trying to derail his experiment in one week?
"I can help!" She insists.
"I don't want your help, I want you gone!" He boomed, "The only reason I haven't thrown you out of this room yet is that you'll run off to tattle to your father. If you're staying, you're going to be quiet, and you are going to stay out of my way."
"I guess neither of us is getting what we want." She mutters as she crosses her arms. "I am not leaving."
"I don't have time to deal with this right now! Do you see that storm out there? That is the most crucial piece of my research. If this goes up in flames because you had to come up here and get emotional-"
"I'll stay out of the way," Judi bargained at last, settling herself that getting to be around him at all was reward enough. "Just let me observe."
Isaac's eyes flashed with burning irritation, his voice seething. "Fine."
If he had it his way, he would have already used his ability to ban her from the lab. And while he had asserted himself, there was a part of him still worried about what her father would think of his poor treatment of his daughter. That fear had kept him in line and compliant to her harebrained requests thus far. He'd reminded himself again and again that it was only a few more months of tolerating her, but Judi Stonehearst had a habit of overstaying her welcome.
Gritting his teeth, he turned back to his work, eyeing the storm and the distant flashes of lightning. His mind was stirred up and distracted, and he had Judi to blame for it. He turned and left the window, jogging up the stairs to the landing where the experiment would be taking place. While he adjusted levers and inspected gauge readings, all he could think about was Sila dancing with Caspian.
He had not wanted to go to the dance, but he did not think he was so replaceable. His ego had taken a hit, and it was making it hard for him to concentrate. He had hoped selfishly that she would ultimately decide not to go, but the fact that she had readily gone back to the werewolf had him reeling.
Judi took a seat below, watching him observantly with a smug expression. She had successfully planted the seeds of doubt required for the final blow to the Night/Watts partnership that had been a thorn in her side for weeks.
She watched him work, and while she had come to the tower for a very different reason, she was curious to see what he'd spent so much of his time working on. As he made his preparations, she had many questions, but decided that there would be plenty of time for them once the dust settled.
Isaac looked out the glass again from the railing, the clock hands obscuring part of his view of the darkness just outside. Not many minutes left now, his heart ticked harder, his pulse pounded in his veins, and his adrenaline kicked in. Bowing his head over the control console, he wrote down observations in his notebook, jotting down each incremental change.
Thunder bellowed outside, deep and guttural. It sounded more like a hungry beast than a force of nature. Lightning struck every couple of seconds to the distant west, and the storm rolled forward until it had steadily gathered directly over the academy. The ashy gray clouds churned angrily, appearing tornadic.
The music on the radio cut out in favor of an emergency alert, the electronic droning of the weather warning alarm. The chiming was even more unsettling in the quiet stillness of the tower while the wind whooshed outside. For a moment, Isaac wondered if the lightning rod would stay in place on the roof if the gusts picked up any more.
Judi watched from her seat, shifting uncomfortably. Away from the sight of Isaac, the wannabe young woman settled back into being just a young girl. She frowned, looking down at her hands and the black nail polish she had painted on her nails. She chipped at the corner, wondering why the advice had not worked... She'd pored over every romance and relationship column in the young-adult magazines in the library over the last week. In the damp, dim study corner, she spent hours reading and rereading, taking down notes and making observations that she could apply to her circumstances. All the articles had said to be confident, outgoing, and tell a man what he wants.
She frowned, realizing that she may have overlooked the fact that Isaac Night wasn't exactly a man. Not in the typical sense, at least. He did not seem fazed by the needs or desires that plagued other young men his age. Isaac was a stone wall that every good-intentioned effort of love was wasted on, and the black pit of despair where adoration went to die.
He turned, marching back to where the power source was situated. He checked the connections again for a fourth time, exhaling a shaky, anxious breath.
"It's coming," He muttered under his breath, not to Judi, not even to himself. This was something he'd been waiting weeks for. He would make damn sure it would be memorable.
Sila
The song changed again, now the ballad We Got Tonight by Bob Seger. I swayed absently to the melody, taking in everything, grounding myself in the moment, hoping that by doing so, I'd be able to remember it all for years to come. The taste of the punch staining my lips, the vibration in my bones with every drum beat, the way my friends look around the table, the wagers Gomez and Caspian were making beside me... All things considered, life is good. Tonight is good.
I sip my punch, looking at the students on the dance floor. Dottie and Blaize each danced with boys. Blaize had managed to ensnare Brax for the evening, much to the frustration of the girls watching from the sidelines. Larissa danced with the young man, who, despite her height and heels, was just as tall as her. They danced to two more songs before he returned her to her seat, out of breath and a bit flustered.
"Have fun?" I tease, and she smiled, shaking her head and looking down. She looked lovely in a champagne-pink silk slip dress with matching elbow-length gloves and heels that served her tall stature well. She had her white-blonde hair swept up in a clean bun, not a hair out of place.
My eyes perused the room again, settling on the stained glass window facing Iago Tower. Deep grey clouds were setting densely overhead, and when the thunder rumbled, I could feel it through the floor and hear it over the bass of the music.
I reach up subconsciously to toy with my necklace, weaving the chain between my fingers out of habit while I watch. When my fingertips touched the metal of the orb, I pulled away in surprise, observing that the metal now radiated a noticeable heat. Not yet hot, but a steady warmth as though it were filled with hot water. Looking down at it, I roll it between my fingers, trying to identify what would cause it to heat up.
There was no visual damage to cause concern. I curl my fingers tightly around it, feeling the steady heat emanating from its core. Strange.
The outro of Don't You Forget About Me faded into the synth intro of Forever Young. The sound of it took me back to a memory I did not even know I had. Being eight years old, riding in my dad's truck while he sang along to it on the radio... Then again, after his diagnosis, I came downstairs one evening for a glass of water and walked in on my parents dancing to it in the kitchen. Just a slow shuffle in a circle while she pressed her forehead against his shoulder and cried. I had not thought of that night since.
But now, I could not hear it without thinking of my dad, and it brought a smile to my face. I closed my eyes, listening to the intro, letting the ethereal melody settle over me.
"Sila, would you like to dance?"
Caspian had risen from his chair and extended his hand towards me. I took it immediately, and he led us out into the gentle swaying on the dance floor. Without words, he arranged us accordingly, placing my hand on his shoulder while he held my other. "May I put my hand on your hip?" He checked, and I nodded. Carefully, he pressed his hand to my side and began to guide us.
He moved slowly and purposefully, each shift intentional. He looked down at me, brown eyes burning with words he would not stay. I look back at him, feeling the guilt weighing on my heart growing heavier. Guilt for unrequited feelings for him, guilt for abandoning Isaac for a dance.
"See? I kept my word, I won't let you embarrass yourself." He assured me with a smile, and his words shook something in me. I kept my word.
I had not kept mine.
Promise after promise. I told Isaac I would be there. I would help him. I would prioritize the project no matter what... At what point did the thread of priority become so tangled? When my feelings got involved, or was I just that unreliable from the start?
My steps faltered, and Caspian paused, "Is everything okay?"
I met his eyes, mine wide, words frozen on my tongue I could not make myself say, knowing how disappointing it would be for him to hear them. His gaze moved from my eyes to the window on our left. He looked up at Iago Tower and back down at me. "Do you need to go?" He asked quietly. I nod once deftly. "I- I have a promise to keep." I stuttered, and he nodded. Giving my hand one last squeeze, he spun me out, but this time, he released me, burying his hands in his jacket pockets to watch me go.
I wedge through the remainder of the crowd to the outer edge of the dance floor. My heels kept getting entangled in my dress as I tried to speed up. Every step I took felt like ten more were added. I could not move fast enough, and it reminded me of times I had tried to run in my dreams.
Stopping in the middle of the floor, I pried off my heels, carrying them by the straps as I ran out the door under the stone arches.