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“You’re sure you’re okay with this?”
“Absolutely. I’m a big boy, Tim. Swinging around skyscrapers might be a little much for me, but I can handle being arm candy for a night.” Bernard kisses his boyfriend. “Besides, if anything happens, Kon can have us both home in five seconds flat.”
“I know. I just wish I could go with you.”
Kon is his best friend, and Tim trusts him entirely. That isn’t the issue. He just hates knowing that he’ll be stuck on comms while his best friend and civilian boyfriend walk into enemy territory.
“I’ll get him home to you in one piece. I promise.” Kon holds Tim’s gaze for a moment, and they both nod.
“All set, then? Everyone ready?” Bernard claps his hands, turning to Kon. “Let’s get moving, Superboy. We wouldn’t want to be more than fashionably late.”
Kon sweeps him up, and Tim just barely sees Bernard’s face turn pink before they disappeared in a blur of formalwear.
Tim laughs despite his nerves, heading for the comms center. And Bernard accused Tim of having a crush on Kon. Like there was any possible way anyone could keep an entirely level head around Kon-El Kent, regardless of their feelings or lack thereof.
~~~
Stay strong, Bernard. You can make it through one night.
Kon sets him down gently, and Bernard gives him a sunny smile, trying to ignore the phantom feel of Kon’s arms around him. “Thanks!”
“No problem.”
Bernard straightens his jacket, and almost gets poked in the eye when he looks up. Kon winces, pulling his hand back.
“Sorry, your hair got pretty messy. The team always makes me fix it, since it’s kinda my fault.”
Bernard raises his eyebrows. “Is that why you always look like this?”
Kon scowls. “Like what?”
Bernard vaguely waves a hand at Kon’s whole person. The messy black waves perfectly framing cornflower-blue eyes, sun-tanned skin set off by the stark black and white of formal wear. “The whole artfully tousled bad boy thing. You’re telling me it’s just the wind?”
“I guess?”
Bernard closes his eyes for a moment. The boy doesn’t even put in any effort, he just looks like that. Bernard is pretty sure he himself looks like a lightning-struck haystack right now. “Right, okay. Yes, please fix my hair.”
Kon obliges, Bernard does not blush at the feeling of fingers combing through his hair, and they head down to the event.
Bernard had a couple reasons for agreeing to help with tonight’s mission.
- He’s the best person for the mission. This is wild, but somehow true. Bernard knows the venue because he’d briefly worked there, he isn’t recognizable enough to put the mission in jeopardy, and Tim knows too many of the guests through his role at WE to work freely. Tim is also monitoring equipment back at the Tower, and no one else can take his place there. Kon needs an extra pair of hands and help maintaining his cover if someone recognizes him through Luthor, and the rest of the Titans are off-planet at the moment.
- It was cool as hell. How many people got a chance to be part of an undercover Titans mission? Maybe it was a little dorky, but Bernard saw his chance to live out his heist movie fantasy and he took it. Obviously.
- Maybe possibly he and Tim had a conversation a couple weeks ago about Tim and Kon’s very obvious crush on each other. A crush both Tim and Kon were insisting didn’t exist. Tim had in fact spluttered that he would never do that to Bernard – to either of them! To which Bernard had carefully said he wouldn’t mind, actually, given that it’s Kon. To which Tim said exactly, it’s Kon! He’s my best friend, and he doesn’t see me that way, and I would never want to make him uncomfortable. And Bernard had bitten his tongue and resigned himself to several more months of all three sides of this unnecessary love triangle pining over each other. Then Tim read him in on this mission, and very nervously asked if he was okay with posing as Kon’s date, and Bernard realized he had a golden opportunity.
So really Bernard has two missions tonight. First, get the magical artifact which was currently stashed in a safe on the 25th floor, bringing it back to Titan’s Tower to be secured. Second, get his idiot-genius boyfriend and their hot knucklehead friend to admit they had feelings for each other.
If Bernard somehow manages to end up dating Kon too, that would be…well, it isn’t a requirement, but it would be a hell of a bonus.
The gala is pretty boring – a lot of executives rubbing elbows and the nouveau riche trying to look effortless – but that’s fine. Bernard’s not here to party. He smiles and leans into Kon and doesn’t flinch even a little when Devlin Jones walks by, even though everyone knows he’s a puppet steered by Venusian parasites.
~~~
Kon is in deep shit. This was supposed to be a fairly simple, safe mission. Get in without attracting attention, retrieve the artifact from Nielson’s safe, get out, get Bernard home unscathed.
Except now Bernard is curled into his side like a cat, and he’s smiling like sunshine, and can’t seem to go two sentences without flirting, and he’s Tim’s boyfriend . Tim, who is currently on comms, hearing said flirting loud and clear. Tim, who occasionally stumbles over his words, but doesn’t protest once, just checks in to make sure they’re okay.
Kon is not okay. Kon is alive, but he’s not sure he will be for much longer. Rao, he thought it was hard to deal with those moments when Tim is being all dark and smart and cutting and lithe, but somehow his boyfriend is just as bad? Without even any Bat training? What the hell is in Gotham’s water?
Bernard’s breath is warm against his ear, and Kon is working very hard to keep a straight face. “Next door on the right.”
Kon jimmies the lock, and they slip into the office. Kon scans the room, and immediately picks out the lead-lined safe behind a row of fake spines on the bookshelf. “We’re in the office,” he murmurs over comms, heading for the shelf.
Bernard keeps watch so Kon can focus his attention on cracking the safe. Tumblers slowly click into place. One, two, three, four…
There’s a noise in the hallway, and Bernard hisses a warning. Kon slaps the fake books back in place over the almost-opened safe, just as Bernard reaches him. Bernard grabs him by the labels, yanking him close, and Kon goes along out of habit, trying not to tear the suit. Then Bernard’s lips are brushing against his neck, and his breath is warm on Kon’s pulse, and Kon forgets everything except the feeling of Bernard’s hips in his hands, and Bernard’s mouth on his skin–
“Everything alright over there?” Tim’s voice is in his ear, tense as Artemis’s bowstring.
Kon is halfway across the room before Bernard’s eyes open. He stumbles to a stop, a hand rising to his comm and falling away again.
Bernard just winks and answers. “All clear, babe. Heard someone coming, but they walked right past. Just focused on keeping our cover intact.” He lifts one eyebrow at Kon. “Want to finish with that safe so we can get out of here?”
Kon blinks, trying to remember what a safe is. “Yeah. Yeah, I’ll do that.” He uncovers the safe, sliding the lock until the last tumbler falls in place. They’d agreed to this, right? They’d all agreed to whatever was needed to keep their cover. Bernard thought they were about to get caught, and found a way to keep that cover. Still. He just kissed Tim’s boyfriend. Was kissed by Tim’s boyfriend? Made out with Tim’s incredibly cute boyfriend with Tim on comms.
Fuck, if he wasn’t so stressed, that would be really hot.
Bernard pulls a leather bag from his pocket, turns it inside-out to pick up the bewitched necklace, and seals it up tight. Bernard studies his face, brown eyes worried. “You alright there, Superboy?”
“Fine,” Kon croaks. “We got the artifact, let’s get home.”
“Home sounds good.” Bernard continues to stand, watching him, like he’s waiting for something.
Right. They have to actually leave this office to get home. Kon closes and relocks the safe, covers it with the row of faux books, and follows Bernard out of the office.
~~~
Bernard feels like the cat that got the cream, leading Kon back into the ballroom. The artifact was safely stashed in his pocket, they’d made it in and out of the office without detection, and he’d found an excuse to kiss freaking Kon-El Kent. And Kon had been into it, if that little gasp and his blown-wide pupils were any indication. Tim, too, by the sound of his voice after everything went quiet and breathy on comms.
He tugs on Kon’s arm, turning them to face each other. “You look a little flushed, babe,” he says, for anyone who might be listening in the crowded room. “Maybe we should head home for the night.”
Bernard somehow forgot that Kon is far better trained in undercover work than him. Kon has also apparently either gotten over his shock or slapped a very good poker face over it until they get out of this building. He leans in, his breath tickling Bernard’s ear. “I think that sounds like the best idea you’ve had all day, sweetheart. Can’t keep Tim waiting up too late for us.”
It’s Bernard’s turn to flush, and he hears a choked sound over comms. God, his hopes were high and his expectations were low, but Kon just shattered all of them. His smile widens into a grin. “No, we can’t have that. Not when he’s been so patient.”
Kon’s gaze flickers, just the barest trace of hesitation before he wraps an arm around Bernard’s waist. He sets a quick pace toward the front doors, just slow enough to look eager but not suspicious. “I need you to be a little patient right now, sweetheart.”
“Oh, darling, you have no idea how patient I’ve been.”
Kon stumbles, glancing over at him, but gets them out of the building. The second they’re out of sight of any guests or cameras, he scoops Bernard into a bridal carry. Bernard’s breath is snatched away as Kon sweeps them into the sky.
~~~
Kon sets Bernard down a few feet from Red Robin’s desk. Tim is sitting at said desk, comms still running, and turns to stare at them both. Shit. He definitely heard everything. Kon takes a step back, but he’s not going to lie to Tim.
“I kissed Bernard.”
“Don’t be silly,” Bernard pipes up, trying to smooth his wind-ruffled hair. “I kissed you.”
“Ngh,” says Tim.
Bernard looks from Tim to Kon, and his mouth twists downward. “Are we okay? I know we agreed to keeping our cover, and I really did think someone was about to come in–”
“It’s–” Kon looks at Tim. Tim can’t seem to decide which of them to stare at. “I’m fine. As long as you’re fine.”
Bernard relaxes. “Oh, I’m fine. More than fine.” He pulls the leather bag from his pocket. “I successfully completed my first heist and made out with Superboy. I’m doing amazing .” He leans past Tim, dropping the bag on his desk. “You should try it sometime, babe. 15/10, cannot recommend enough.”
“Ngh,” says Tim.
Kon presses a thumb into the palm of his other hand, watching Tim anxiously. “Are we?”
Tim blinks. “Are we?”
“Okay?”
Tim closes his eyes, takes a deep breath, and opens them again. Ice-blue and laser focused on Kon. “We are…so okay. Absolutely okay.”
Bernard props his hands on his hips, smirking at them both. “Right. Glad we got that sorted. I’m gonna go make some cocoa. Come find me when you’ve finished talking this out, and not before. I can’t do all the work for you, and I have been waiting long enough for this conversation.” He leans down to kiss Tim, blows another kiss to Kon, who hadn’t realized his face could turn any more red, and heads off in the direction of the kitchen.
Tim buries his face in his hands, and Kon swallows.
“Um, I don’t know what he thinks we need to talk about, but–”
“I do,” Tim’s voice is muffled by his hands. “He’s made it very clear.”
“Okaaaay.” Kon waits. “Mind filling me in?”
Tim drops his hands to his lap. “He thinks– he knows I have a crush on you.”
Kon isn’t sure how he can be hearing nothing and everything all at once. “Oh,” he manages.
“And I told him I love him, and I would never do that to him,” Tim rushes on, “and he basically said we’ve all got two hands, so he doesn’t see the problem, especially since it’s you, and he’s got a crush on you too, because who doesn’t have a crush on you? But I’m not– you’re my friend, Kon. I’m not trying to ruin our friendship, and I’ll tell Bernard to back off, because our crushes don’t negate your right to boundaries–”
“Tim.”
“--and you’re my friend, Kon. First and foremost. I don’t ever want to lose that because of some stupid–”
“Rob!” Kon kneels in front of him, trying to breathe. “Rob. Tim. I’m not upset.”
Tim’s voice cuts out, but his mouth remains open.
Kon laughs, the sound coming out shaky. “I, um…I was stressing out because I didn’t want to hurt you. We agreed to whatever was needed to keep our cover, but it went a little beyond that, and I’m not going to be a fucking homewrecker, especially if it means hurting you. But if you’re…” he shrugs, taking Tim’s hand, “if you’re both into it…”
“Ngh.” Tim blinks down at him.
“If you’re into it, I’m into it.”
Tim leans forward, his free hand sliding under Kon’s chin to guide them to each other. The first kiss is light, tentative, like Tim’s still afraid he’s ruining everything. Kon drags Tim down to the floor with him, TTK cushioning his knees. He kisses Tim back, and it’s bolder this time, the doubt finally draining away. Kon has no idea how many times he’s dreamed about this; the soft slip of Tim’s hair between his fingers, the sharp angles of Tim’s body beneath his hands, the smooth confidence of Robin that bleeds through into everything Tim does.
When they finally break apart, Tim is panting and Kon’s pretty sure he looks like he’s been hit with a kryptonite frying pan. Kon’s back is against the desk, his tie went missing a while ago, and Tim is perched in his lap. His mouth is swollen. He looks like every dream Kon has ever had.
“Fuck, man, we could have been doing this the whole time?”
Tim snorts, letting his head drop to Kon’s shoulder. “Yeah, we’re both stupid.”
“Thank Rao for Bernard.” Kon laughs and places another kiss under Tim’s jaw.
Tim leans into the touch, soft and relaxed. “He’s the best of us, Kon.”
“I’ve been figuring that out.” Kon tipped his head back. “Want to go show him how much we appreciate him?”
Tim’s lips curl into a smirk. “It does seem selfish not to thank him for all his efforts.”
“You think he’s into the uniform?”
“Slow down, Superstar,” Tim snorts, getting to his feet. “I think he’d actually short circuit if you pulled that out tonight. Save it for the third date.”
Kon grins, following Tim toward the kitchen. “You want to date me? I mean, I got the message you think I’m hot, but I’m still on board if you’re just using me for my body–”
Tim throws him an unreadable look and picks up the pace, dragging him up down the hall.
~~~
Tim tows Kon into the kitchen, and Bernard’s brain short-circuits. Sure, he knew what was likely to happen, but his brain hadn’t quite managed to dream up the two of them looking quite this wonderfully debauched. Tim’s got that look in his eyes; the one that says he’s locked onto a target and won’t rest until his mission is complete.
“Bernard, what are your intentions with Kon?”
Bernard, sitting on the kitchen counter, raises his eyebrows at the old-fashioned turn of phrase. “Um, if you’re both on board, I’d like us all to be boyfriends.”
“And what does that mean to you?” Tim encourages.
Bernard looks from him to Kon. “Kissing, snuggling on the couch, dates with both of you, sex when or if you’re ready, cheesy presents on your birthday…is there another definition?”
Kon makes a small sound that’s not quite a word.
Tim turns to him. “That sounds about right to me. Is that amenable to you?”
Kon covers his eyes with a hand, and his shoulders begin to shake. It takes Bernard a second to realize he’s laughing. “Only you could make a date sound like a business proposal, Rob. Yeah, I’m amenable, you dork.”
Tim positively glows, tugging him forward. “Good. Excellent. Me too.”
Bernard beams, swinging his feet. “Thank god I don’t have to sit around watching you two pine anymore. A guy can only handle so much UST.”
“Speaking of…” Tim and Kon eye each other.
“We probably would have kept being stupid for another 5 years at least,” Tim says.
“Probably,” Bernard says cheerfully.
“And also the whole…” Kon gestures helplessly “everything tonight was, um…”
“You’re a damn menace, Bear.”
Bernard’s cheeks are pink. It’s one thing to guess he’d had an effect on them both. It’s another to see them side by side in front of him, kissed messy and stammering. “Oh yeah?”
Tim kisses him, light and familiar and a little exasperated. The moment he pulls away, Kon is there, and god, it’s even better now that they can take their time. Bernard’s stomach is going wild with butterflies. Tim’s arms sliding around both him and Kon doesn’t do anything to calm them.
“Tim and I agreed that you deserve a whole lot of thanks.”
“And also a little bit of your own medicine.”
Bernard leans into another kiss, Kon’s thumb sliding up his cheek. “Mm-hmm?”
“Maybe a lot of your own medicine, actually,” Kon murmurs. “ Babe .”
“Like you said, you’ve been so very patient for so very long.”
“I have. And you know, I think I deserve a little bit of a reward.”
“I couldn’t agree more,” Tim breathes, as Kon lifts Bernard off the counter and follows him to the bedroom.
Bernard is counting both of tonight’s missions a rousing success.