Chapter Text
Eren’s POV
It was 3rd period, math to be specific, as I drew in my sketchbook to help the class pass by a little faster. I was working on a landscape. Not really my strong suit, but hey that’s why I needed to practice right?
“Jaeger!” Before I knew what had happened the sketchbook was snatched off of my desk and slammed shut. I closed my fist tight and glared up at my math teacher. “If you put half as much effort into studying for my class as you did into your art homework, you would be passing wouldn’t you! See me after class!” He walked away with my sketchbook in his grasp and the whole class was staring at me. What an ass. Sure I’d put effort into it if I understood it. I’d put effort into it if it just clicked like art did for me. I sighed and stared at the page of gibberish in front of me. The rest of the class seemed to drag on, and finally the bell rang. I remained in my seat until every last student was out of the room. Armin gave me a soft smile, and I told him I’d meet up with him later. I walked up to my teacher’s desk to have the dreaded lecture about my grades.
“Do you not want to pass my class, Eren?”
“No sir, that’s not it, I do…”
“Then what’s the problem, because I really don’t understand why you don’t pay attention and why you don’t turn in assignments.” Like I could tell you. Whatever.
“Sorry sir. I’ll try harder. I’ll see if I can get a tutor or something. Maybe Armin can help me catch up?”
“That’s a damn good idea, Jaeger. If you keep slacking off, you WILL fail. I’m not joking.” He handed my sketchbook back and I took it and held it close to my chest.
“Yes sir. I understand.”
“Good. You’re dismissed.” I walked quickly to my 4th period so I wouldn’t be late. Luckily my teacher wouldn’t mind even if I was. I held my sketchbook close as I nearly ran to get to my refuge. The smell of paint and colored pencils wafted through the air as I walked into the familiar room.
“Eren! I’m glad you are here! I thought you were going to be absent today!” Ms. Stallis said with a smile as she waved to me. She had her hair pinned up today and it was a different shade than the day before. Some sort of teal color. She had an apron on, although it didn’t do much to shield her arms from the paint splatters. I tried my best to shoot her a smile back, but I failed. The other AP students were already at work, so I merely sat my sketchbook down and sighed. She frowned and walked over to me. “What’s up, buttercup?”
“Mr. Crouch was giving me a hard time. I just don’t get math….and I may have been sketching in class.”
“Hmmm….have you tried a tutor?” I nodded and thumbed at the corner of my sketchbook.
“I just don’t get it. I’ve tried and it just doesn’t make sense.”
“Well don’t feel bad about that Eren, you know what I’ve always been told. Artists and mathematicians use different sides of their brains. So one side automatically grows stronger.
You’ll figure it out! Just keep trying….and you may not want to sketch in there. I know it’s boring, but I also know how you zone out!” She said with a wink. I gave her a soft smile.
“Now go ahead and get to work, you still have plenty of time.”
I pulled out the pastel drawing I had been working on for the last week and frowned. It hadn’t really went in the direction I’d wanted, but I would stick with it. I woorked meticulously on the details, being careful not to smudge the pastels too much as I worked, and before I knew it, the bell rang and I was once again, rushing to clean up. I ran out the door and down the hallway, hoping to catch Armin still.
He was waiting for me at the front of the school patiently. He was aware that art was my last class and knew by now that I was constantly late cleaning up, but he was my best friend and didn’t mind waiting. Mikasa, my step sister, also waited with him out front.
“Hey guys! I’ll only be able to walk halfway if that’s okay! I need to stop by the arts and crafts store! There’s a charcoal set on sale that I’ve been wanting!”
“So lame, Eren.” Mikasa said as we began walking towards our home. I frowned and followed after them. I didn’t really care what she thought.
“I think it’s cool!” Armin said with a smile. She rolled her eyes and we continued on, snow crunching beneath our feet. Our semesters here would never fail to amaze me. They worked on a really strange calendar. The new semester had just started two weeks ago, the first week of December, and now here we were freezing our asses off in the snow. This was usually about the time teachers start to become concerned with my grades, so it makes sense. “So what did Mr. Crouch say, Eren?”
“He bitched at me. Said I needed to get my grades up.”
“Oh…well that is true. All you ever do in there is sketch.”
“It’s not like I can understand anything!” Finally my eye caught the familiar sign of the art store and I picked up my pace. The last thing I needed was a lecture from my best friend too. “I’ll see you at home, Mikasa.” Before she could reply, I darted inside. I reminded myself of just how much money I had. How many little kid’s faces I’d painted at that birthday party to save up that much. It would definitely be worth it though! Ms. Stallis actually recommended me for the job! I walked happily down the aisles and spotted my prize. A red sale tag hung underneath and I smiled. I had enough for the charcoal, an eraser set, and a pad of charcoal paper!
I grabbed my things and headed up to the register, where a bored looking cashier leaned against the counter. Flipping through his phone. He looked dark, aside from the uniform he was wearing. Was that eyeliner? I can’t believe a chain store like this would allow that. His hair was dark also, and it was neatly split down the middle, with a little length hanging down in front. He sighed and set his phone down as I put my items on the counter. He forced out a hello, like it would kill him, and rang up my items. It came to 26.75. Shit. Damn tax. Damn math.
“What’s wrong kid, mommy and daddy not give you enough lunch money to pay?” He said snidely as I looked at the money in my wallet. I only had $26.00. I sighed.
“My mommy is dead and my daddy doesn’t give me shit.” Where did that come from? Well…he did start it… “Just take the erasers off.” His expression didn’t change.
“What a pain. How much do you have?”
“26.00” He reach in his pocket and pulled out the change and threw it onto the counter.
“It’s more of a pain in my ass to call the manager up her for a void, besides you need those for charcoal.” Was he an artist too? His grey eyes continued to stare blankly at me and I handed over the rest of the money.
“Thanks! I owe you!” He shrugged.
“It’s just seventy-five cents, kid. No biggie.” He handed me the receipt and reach me the bag. I grabbed my supplies and before I could say thanks, his phone was in his hand again.
The cold air hitting my face was just like a cold wake up of the environment I was about to walk into. What kind of mood would Dad be in today? I sighed and walked through the door quietly.
“I’m home!” I announced as I dropped my things in the living room.
“Eren. In here. Now.” Shit. Just what I needed. I walked into the kitchen to find dad sitting at the table. “Sit down. We need to talk.” Ugh. This is bad. I took a seat across from him and stared at him, looking as passive as I could. “I got a phone call from your math teacher today.” Double shit. “He didn’t seem very happy with your grades…or your attention in class.”
“I’m sor-“
“I’M NOT DONE.” I nodded and sat there patiently.
“He told me you were sketching in class. IN MATH CLASS? Why?” This was a trick question. If I reply I was going to get screamed at. If I didn’t reply, I was going to get screamed at, so I just stayed quiet.
“EREN! You need to pay attention and not be a damn failure! Give me your sketchbook!” I shot him a glare. “NOW.” I handed it over, knowing perfectly well what he was capable of.
“Go get your other shit too. Everything. I’m locking it up until your grades get better!”
“But!” Before I could say another word his hand met my face and he slapped me so hard, I couldn’t think twice. Tears welled up in my eyes from the sting of the impact.
“What, are you gonna cry? You are a disgrace. Go get everything. Plus what you just bought. I know you stopped on the way home. You always stop there when Mikasa gets home first.” I went into the living room and picked up the new bag of supplies I had just worked so hard for. I wanted to cry, but he wouldn’t get to see that. I dropped my bag on the table on front of him. Next I went to my room and collected all of my art supplies. I knew to be thorough, because he was the type to search my room and punish me later if I didn’t comply with demands. I dropped all of my sketchbooks on the table with a sigh. “Only if you have art HOMEWORK, are you allowed to get these. Understood.”
“Yes, sir.” He dismissed me, and I walked up the stairs to my empty bedroom. I fell onto my bed and as soon as my face hit the pillow, my tears started. I couldn’t help this shit. I couldn’t help that my home life was so fucked up I couldn’t concentrate on homework here. I couldn’t help that math looked like some kind of word puzzle to me. No one understood. And now I felt this heavy pressure on my chest. I couldn’t express any of my feeling onto paper. I grabbed a regular notebook and tried doodling for a bit, but it seemed like a waste. All of my money was gone, so now I couldn’t even afford a pack of printer paper. Maybe I could get a ream from Ms. Stallis…but then she would ask questions. UGH! I just put my head under my pillow and cried myself to sleep.
The following day was just as shitty, if not even worse. I had no sketchbook to pass my day quicker, and nothing to look forward to coming home to. Just mind numbing tv. I sighed. It was about 6pm, so I decided to slip on my shoes and go for a walk around town. Most of the town we lived in was a college campus, so it was relatively safe.
“I’ll be back in a while!” I said as I walked out the door. I didn’t even know where to go, I just needed to clear my head. If mom was still alive, would she have let dad treat us like this? I say us….but he treats Mikasa okay. He’s never raised a hand to her, which I’m thankful for. I’d rather it be just me… The snow crunched under my feet as I walked, and new flakes started falling lazily from the sky. Eventually I arrived at the center of the college. The maintenance crew was beginning to hang lights for Christmas, and everything was starting to be bathed in a warm amber light. I walked past a large window and saw a lone student working on a painting. This must be the art department. I longed to be inside. Even just to sit for a while in a familiar environment at least. I sighed and watched him work for a while. He seemed familiar somehow. Suddenly he turned and looked over his shoulder at me. It was the cashier from yesterday!
Ugh oh! He looked pissed. He was walking towards the door and I turned to run away.
“Hey, You fucking brat! What’s the deal? You like creeping up on people?”
“No! I’m sorry! I was just going for a walk a-and-“
“And what?! Huh! Thought you’d stare?!” My face was turning red. I didn’t know what to say. I just began to try to form some kind of sentence.
“I-I didn’t have anywhere t-to go, and then I saw you painting. It’s really good! I just wanted to watch! I’m sorry! I’ll leave!” His breath was swirling around him as he glared at me.
“How long have you been out here anyways? You look cold.”
“Not that long.” I tried to lie, but I could see the layer of snow on my clothes.” He narrowed his eyes. “Come in if you want to watch so badly. I’m taking a break though.” He said as he started back inside.
“What?”
“I’m not saying it again, moron!” I followed quickly after him, into the door and warmth surrounded me. I got a better view of his painting from up close and smiled. The colors
were great, even if it wasn’t finished.
“You’re that kid from yesterday right? Seventy-five cents?” I looked at the floor and nodded. “Can’t even afford a place to stay?” He asked as he was busy with the coffee maker. He looked like he was making a fresh pot.
“I’ve got a place to stay…” He looked over at me with those piercing grey eyes. He didn’t even seem to acknowledge that I’d said anything until he was done preparing the coffee pot to brew.
“Just don’t want to be there?” He asked as he leaned against the wall. He crossed his arms and looked at me with questioning eyes. All I could do was nod. How did he know? He had figured out more about me in the last 30 seconds then most people had in years. “Well, welcome to the studio anyways kid. It’s usually open. So…I guess if you ever need a place to hangout you should be okay here…what’s your story?”
“I…don’t want to talk about it.” He sighed and looked at the coffee slowly dripping into the pot.
“Look brat. I’m not going to photo shop you a college ID unless you fess up. That’s the deal.” My eyes got wide at his words.
“Why are you helping me?”
“Don’t turn this on me. Do you want a place to go or not?!”
“YES!” I grabbed my hair and tears nearly stung at my eyes. The only other person that knew how bad it was at home was Armin, and I don’t even think he knew the worst of it. “My dad’s a total ass okay! My mom passed away, so it’s just him, me and my sister there. He takes all of his shit out on me. In more ways than one. He took all of my art supplies away yesterday. All because of fucking math class.” He didn’t say a word. He just kept the same stoic expression on his face and walked to the coffee pot once it stopped dripping. He poured us both a cup, and left mine on the counter.
“Yours is right there. I’ll be back.” I frowned. He hadn’t even replied to the confession of my life’s secrets. I got up and walked over to my cup and loaded it down with powdered cream and sugar, stirring nervously as I did so. I don’t even know this guy, and I’m trusting him so blindly. Oh well. It’s not like my life is all roses and daisies.
I heard a beep and the lock on the door clicked. He walked in with something in his hand.
“Don’t lose this. I’m not making another one. A-because I can get expelled. And B. because I’m lazy.” I nodded and followed him across the room to a small computer. He placed the ID in the printer, and began typing in information. “What’s your name?”
“Eren. Eren Jaeger.”
“How the fuck do you spell that?” I laughed and spelled it out for him. He typed it accordingly and I watched carefully. He plugged his phone into the computer. “Jacket off.” I slid it off and tossed it into the chair next to him. He held his camera up. “Say, smile like a college freshman!” he said with a smirk. I grinned and he snapped my picture. “Nice. That’ll work.” He clicked a few more times, and ran the ID through the printer with an awful noise. I winced at the sound. “Don’t ask me how I found out I would work. It needs to dry now.” He let it sit in the printer for a long while before he even bothered to touch it. We sat together on the sofa, discussing different mediums and artists. I really did enjoy his company, even if he was an asshole.
“You never did tell me your name.”
“Levi. I figured you would have read one of the name tags, idiot.” Wow. Really? Was he an ass or was he helpful? I couldn’t decide. “But you are just a college freshman after all right? Ha.” He stood up off of the sofa and stretched, then walked over to the printer. He carefully touched the ink on the ID to see of it was dry and nodded. “Alright, I’ll run it through the laminator and it’ll be done!” He ran it through the weird machine and trimmed it carefully with scissors before handing it to me. “Get a lanyard or something to keep it on. So it won’t get lost. I’m serious. I won’t make you another.”
“Thanks! I really appreciate it!” He nodded and led me over to the door. Just scan the little box here and it’ll unlock for you. All the paper and supplies up against that wall there.” He pointed to the far wall that was filled to the brim with paper and supplies. “It’s all school provided. No one hardly uses it, because it’s pretty shitty stuff, it’s what the school uses our studio fees to buy. That’s fair game. Use all you want. Anything that’s got my name on it, you can use too, unless I leave a note on it from here on out. Or unless it’s locked. Got it?” My chest felt like it was going to explode.
“Do I ever have to go home?” He actually cracked a smile and patted my back.
“People DO sleep here sometimes. By the way Eren…Be prepared to experience some weird shit…welcome to Trost Universities Art Department, where only the mentally insane choose to study art apparently.”
I stayed there until Levi said he had to get back to work, and I let myself out. I treaded back home, back to the place that I dreaded even calling a home. At least I had a place to look forward to going to now. I fell back into the covers with a smile tonight. For once, I had something to look forward to.