CaitCat
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hedonic adaptation by missandrogyny for MissCeeEmBee
Fandoms: 방탄소년단 | Bangtan Boys | BTS
13 May 2026
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Summary
Lunchtime prep has always been simple. Service is from eleven to two-thirty, and they’re only really serving soups and stews, mostly to cater to the elderly population nearby.
“I’m going to smoke,” Yoongi says gruffly. He pulls off his apron and drops it in front of his station. “Seokjin-hyung’s in charge.”
He doesn’t wait for a response, just stalks off to his locker to grab his pack of cigarettes. Distantly, he hears some chatter, some laughter, and a bout of quiet complaining from Hoseok, “He doesn’t always need to tell us that he left you in charge.”
“Well,” Yoongi hears Seokjin reply. “He does that because Yoongi has a cru—”
Yoongi shuts the door behind him.
(or: AU where Yoongi and Seokjin run a restaurant together.)
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 15,891
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 51
- Kudos:
- 470
- Bookmarks:
- 128
- Hits:
- 4,153
Bookmarked by CaitCat
27 Jul 2026
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Summary
There’s an art to building a joke, a clinical method only practice and years of training can turn into mastery.
First comes the setup. You set the mood for the audience, lure them into thinking this is a perfectly normal character, a perfectly mundane situation. That way, they can picture a clear image in their head, relate to the scene.
Then, you have the punchline.
The setup of this story is this: Man writes a routine out of anger against an injustice and goes viral.
The punchline? Yoongi hasn’t figured that part out yet.(Or Comedian Min Yoongi goes viral after an acerbic routine on nation’s son-in-law Kim Seokjin’s public outing.)
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 138,610
- Chapters:
- 13/13
- Comments:
- 1,127
- Kudos:
- 1,740
- Bookmarks:
- 614
- Hits:
- 43,945
Bookmarked by CaitCat
15 Jun 2026
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Summary
"Hey! There's someone up here!" the young man shouted.
The shout shattered the stillness. Jungkook's heart stuttered in his chest as heavy footsteps pounded up the creaky stairs.
No time. He had to move now.
Or, the post-apocalyptic Goldilocks AU where an injured and starving Jungkook stumbles onto a farm in the wasteland, tastes dishes of varying temperatures, tests a nice bed, and finds out the farm is occupied by 6 men who are not happy to see him.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 105,632
- Chapters:
- 11/11
- Comments:
- 271
- Kudos:
- 922
- Bookmarks:
- 285
- Hits:
- 17,913
Bookmarked by CaitCat
11 Jan 2026
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Summary
“I’m going to break up with him,” Jimin hiccuped between sobs.
“Mmhm.” Jungkook poured him a shot.
“I’m serious this time.” Jimin wiped snot away with his sleeve. “I can’t take this anymore.”
“Unh.” Taehyung made a ssam for him and put it on his plate.
Jimin cried in his hands, incomprehensible. “I’m going to do it,” He blubbered, “It’s over—it’s so fucking over, I’m—after everything,” A hiccup, “—you know?” He downed a shot.
“Absolutely.” Seokjin dutifully fried pork belly on the grill.
Everyone kept eating, stoned-faced, when Jimin broke out into a terrible cry.
“Chogiyo!” Jungkook raised his arm. “Two more bottles of soju, please.”
OR
Jimin's life changes with a single "chogiyo."
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 9,776
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Comments:
- 226
- Kudos:
- 3,772
- Bookmarks:
- 1,079
- Hits:
- 32,777
Bookmarked by CaitCat
20 Apr 2025
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Summary
Jeongguk thought he was the last human alive. Turns out he's wrong. Oh, and aliens are a thing. He's not sure which is more confusing yet.
OR, Jeongguk gets rescued by aliens after a fast-moving disease wipes out all but 3 members of the human race, and the shenanigans that follow.
Series
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 269,766
- Chapters:
- 59/59
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 1,382
- Kudos:
- 1,394
- Bookmarks:
- 373
- Hits:
- 61,956
Bookmarked by CaitCat
25 Jan 2025