Our Flag Means Alternate Universes
A collection of the best Our Flag Means Death Alternate Universe stories. This is my contribution to the fandom, taking my professional librarian skills combined with my obsessive love of AUs and curating what is essentially a ‘best of’ collection.
Any ship, any rating. AUs in this case means entirely new worlds, not future episodes or seasons. Rewrites are allowed if they are bringing something entirely new, not just as fix-its. Otherwise the door is wide open. Lets do something weird.
(Closed, Moderated)
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Summary
Ed and Stede meet as strangers one night on a New York subway platform when Stede discovers an abandoned newborn baby. Both men are instantly infatuated with him (and each other). When they attend the court hearing for his case, the judge spontaneously decides to offer Stede custody, which he accepts– only to realize afterwards that she assumed they were a couple.
The two men immediately craft a plan to pretend to be together in order to keep the baby, creating fake backstories, coaching their friends, and moving in together... into the same bedroom... and the same bed. But what they didn't anticipate was falling head over heels in love, not only with their son, but with each other.
Inspired by the TRUE STORY outlined in this article
Features: a very fast slow burn, fake dating, only one bed, pining while fucking, and other tropes
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- Part 1 of Baby Baby Baby
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What is an omega who isn't allowed to be an omega? What sort of omega marries a female beta in the hopes of saving the family name? Stede Bonnet knows he's about to find out as his father courts a woman he's never met and he becomes sole heir of the Bonnet family fortune. He's never had a say in his life, not really, not since the day he'd presented as an omega, but now? Now Stede has nothing to lose as he sets out to experience at least one night of being true to himself. It's worth any risk, any cost, just so he has that one night to hold onto as he bows his head to his father's whims.
Edward Teach works the ships for Hornigold, barely legal shipping and imports, but it pays the bills and fuels his desire the life of power and wealth he's always wanted. As he begins to make a name for himself he stumbles on a sweet omega in a tavern on the cusp of getting into trouble.
The scent of lavender and a pair of hazel eyes changes the course of his life forever.
Series
- Part 3 of Our Flag Means Omegaverse
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The true history:
The Pacific Clipper was a Pan American Airlines scheduled commercial flight from San Francisco, California, to Auckland, New Zealand that operated from 1939 to 1941. All tickets were first class and cost around $15,000 in 2024 US dollars; passengers ate five course meals prepared by chefs from four star restaurants. From December 1941 to January 1942, the Pacific Clipper completed an unplanned nearly around-the-world flight: the first commercial circumnavigation of the globe. Oh, also, there is an actual historical guy referred to as ‘the Swede’ who was the First Engineer on the crew.The Our Flag Means Death version:
Our crew:
Captain Stede Bonnet
First Officer Frenchie
Second Officer/Navigator Buttons
Third Officer Wee John Feeney
Fourth Officer Archie
First Engineer The Swede
Second Engineer Pete
First Radio Officer Edward Teach
Second Radio Officer Jim Jimenez
Radio Operator Oluwande Boodhari
Purser Roach
Asst Purser Lucius Spriggs -
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“That one with the leather and the hair, he’s getting cast for sure.”
“Oh, yeah. Doesn’t even matter if you can actually bake, when you look like that!”
“He’ll be this year’s Chigs, or Sandro. Everyone’s flavor, you know?”When Ed Teach gets cast on The Great British Bake Off, he understands the assignment. Look hot on camera, banter with the judges, bake memorable shit.
He isn’t there to make trouble. He isn't there to make friends.
And he certainly isn’t there to fall in love with fellow baker Stede Bonnet.
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Professor Edward Teach has been fascinated by pirates since the time he was a child thanks to sharing his name with one of the most famous pirates in the world. He's specialized in them from their history in the distant past to the current iterations of piracy in the modern world. He's finally settled down in an illustrious university to teach his passion when one evening a new name pops up on the class roster.
Stede Bonnet.
It isn't the first time a vampire has been in his class, but it's the first time one of them has pretended to be a famous pirate from the Golden Age. The new student vampire seems to be insistent that Ed's got his facts muddled and is eager to correct him time and time again.
And worse, the man is damnably attractive, well spoken and interesting as fuck, even if he is carrying delusions about being the former Gentleman Pirate.
Series
- Part 3 of Our Flag Means Supernatural
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Alpha Ed Teach meets omega Stede Bonnet over a business proposal. He doesn't expect the power to go out all over the city and them to be trapped together in a small apartment, but suppressants linger in the body for long enough it shouldn't be a problem before the power comes back on.
The problem is that "shouldn't" isn't the same as "won't."
Series
- Part 7 of Smutty Gentlebeard not-quite-one shots
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work that, work that, pop back, hurt that by orphan_account
Fandoms: Our Flag Means Death (TV)
19 Apr 2023
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Ed gets to bang his coffee shop crush at a charity car wash!
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i don't remember what beautiful means anymore by CartoonMayor
Fandoms: Our Flag Means Death (TV)
04 Feb 2025
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Ed is six years old when they take him to Battle School to train him to defeat the aliens that have invaded Earth twice before.
He has to leave Stede behind.
Series
- Part 13 of OFMD one-shots
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Our saltwater solution reduces gravity’s pull by over 80%, ensuring you'll effortlessly stay afloat! We keep the water at a steady 36 degrees—matching your skin’s temperature. This blend of weightlessness and warmth blurs the lines between your body and the water, as your nerves can’t tell where you end and the surrounding environment begins.
Weightlessness. Yeah. If anything’s gonna be Ed’s cure-all, it’s gotta be weightlessness, right?
Ed’s carried around weight for most of his life. He’s tired. His muscles ache. His joints are all ground down to dust.
Also - the word solution is right there. Which proves it.
This is it. This is Ed’s solution.
(Or: Ed's on a wellness journey for his fuckass brain. It's not going great. The guy at the float tank place is being way too nice about it. Please mind the tags!)