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Wifies fingers trembled over the call button, he couldn’t seriously be thinking about this. Right?
The whole Unstable SMP fanbase knew about Wifies’ and Derapchu’s queerbaiting and their ship. Wifies only did it for clicks and shit, there weren’t any real feelings towards Derapchu. The ship was just a placeholder anyways—for where his heart was actually drawn.
Wifies’ stomach churned in desperation each time his actual crush was mentioned. Him and Parrot’s relationship was….odd to say the least. Wifies was constantly hinting at sexual and romantic relations between the two, yet Parrot always brushed it off as ‘platonic’. Wifies yearned to be able to kiss and bite and just to just be able to feel Parrot—from the inside out. Each time he was near Parrot his entire world centered solely and directly onto him. Hell, he even modeled the whole director arc after how much he wanted Parrot all to himself. He was basically spelling it out in love letters, but every single time, Parrot just dismissed his feelings.
Fuck it. He needed to do this.
He needed Parrot.
Wifies compelled his eyes shut and tapped on the call button. His phone rung for a few seconds until Derpachu inevitably picked up.
“Helloo? Wifies? What’s up?” Derapchu prompted.
Wifies paused. His mind lingered on the absurdity of what his goal was here.
“Can you uh…do me a favor? You owe me anyways.” Wifies sighed.
“Uh sure bro. What is it?”
“This is gonna sound werid, don’t get the wrong idea, but can you like make Parrot jealous? About like, the queerbaiting shit we do? It’s for a prank, it’ll be funny, I promise.” Wifies begged.
“Pfft—I guess bro, if you want me too.” Derapchu scoffed.
“Thank you bro, thank you so much dude.” Wifies cheered.
Wifies eagerly hung up the call, through his excitement, tinges of doubt still lingered. What if Parrot didn’t even care and it was all for nothing? Wifies decided he needed to at least try to express his feelings to Parrot.
──── ୨୧ ────
“Duude, chat was literally calling Wifies my senpai yesterday. That shit was so funny.” Derapchu laughed, putting emphasis on ‘my’.
Parrot reluctantly felt a pang of jealousy seethe through his body.
“Wow. Eventful.” Parrot scoffed.
“Pfft—why are you being so monotone? Are you jealous bro? Jealous of me and Wifies’ heated love?” Derapchu teased.
Parrot grit his teeth. Why did he feel like this? His and Wifies’ relationship was strictly platonic anyways.
It had to be platonic.
“No—ugh. I don’t care bro. He was literally with me last night, i’m not jealous of you.”
Derapchu’s eyes widened—Wifies seriously wasn’t lying. He let out a drawn out “Yooo?”
“Chill. Not like that dude.” Parrot chuckled.
“Uh huh.”
Wifies walked into Parrot’s room, presumably annoyed that he was on call with someone opposed to spending time with his best friend. Wifies walked behind Parrot and begun to rub circles into his shoulders, silently begging Parrot to pay attention to him. The sensation steadily relived Parrot’s jealousy, yet something in him still throbbed for more contact.
“Ah, I gotta go Derap,” Parrot blurted. “I need to uh—go eat.”
“Sure bro. Sure.” Derapchu hung up.
What was that supposed to mean? Whatever.
Parrot scoffed for the second time. Derpachu was genuinely pissing him off—he had no right to be flirting with Wifies so much.
His Wifies.
Parrot halted his thoughts—what the hell was he thinking?
He shouldn’t think like that.
He couldn’t.
Parrot hated the way his mind illustrated Wifies as such a priority.
He wasn’t supposed to think about boys like this.
It’s wrong.
“Parrot?” Wifies tapped on his shoulder. “Please pay attention to me.” He mumbled.
Parrot’s heart spiked at the sound of Wifies’ desperation; the warm feeling harshly contrasted with the prior jealousy. Parrot took off his headset and turned around to see Wifies staring desperately at him. Wifies immediately took the chance to lean down and playfully nip at his neck.
Was this something that friends did?
Parrot felt increasingly superior to Derapchu with each kiss planted against his neck. The words Derapchu used to describe him and Wifies still burned into his brain. He wished he could just prove that Wifies was his. He needed to relive this dreadful envy.
He needed Wifies.
Wifies lifted his head up and graced a gentle peck on his check. Parrot internally ached for more.
Parrot subconsciously clutched Wifies’ hands—shifting the atmosphere warmer.
“Why do you talk to Derap like that?” Parrot blurted out.
“Huh? Wha—what do you mean Parrot?” Wifies stuttered.
“You know what I mean Wifies.”
Wifies bit his tounge in an attempt to hide his smirk—everything was going to plan.
“Why do you care?” Wifies inquired, still harboring the innocent act.
The question made Parrot pause before he opened his mouth—not to speak—but to surge forward and press his lips to Wifies’ mouth.
“Mph!—“ Wifies moaned.
Parrot instantly pulled back, uncertainty and regret filled his veins. Wifies pathetically whined, obviously wanting more. The briefness of the kiss just riled the both of them up even more.
“Why’d you stop?” Wifies whined again.
“You—what? You were literally acting all lovey-dovey with Derapchu yesterday!” Parrot hissed.
Wifies couldn’t hold his grin back this time, he thrived off of Parrot’s anger.
“Aw c’mon Parrot, you’re really gonna be thaaat overprotective? You know i’m just queerbaiting anyways. Plus, you’re the one who said ‘no shipping’.” Wifies taunted, clearly trying to rile him up even more.
“You know i’m still uncertain about all that stuff. I can’t be…” Parrot trailed off.
“Hm.” Wifies noted. “Do you wanna experiment with me? It can be totally platonic, you can just see if doing things with another boy feels good. I’m your best friend after all, aren’t I?”
“What?” Parrot exclaimed.
“We can do whatever you want, and you can see if it feels right. I only want to help you Parrot.”
Wifies’ smirk grew even wider, Parrot could surprisingly still see traces of actual sincerity through his seductive expression.
Parrot sighed. “Fine.”
“Good.” Wifies softly clutched Parrot’s hand and led him to his bed.
Wifies sat them both down, still holding his hand. They were facing each other, yet Parrot was looking at the wall, his face flushed and hesitant.
“Do you want me to kiss you or something?” Parrot blurted, still looking away. This was escalating far too quick.
Wifies turned Parrot’s face toward him.“Sure. Just kiss me how you’d kiss a girl.”
“Uh, okay.” Parrot awkwardly muttered.
Parrot leaned in and cupped Wifies’ cheek, all of his senses were denying the intimate act while his mind was going erratic with ecstasy. Parrot forced his eyes closed and surged forward. As soon as their lips met, Parrot finally felt free, free from anything and everything. All he needed was Wifies.
Wifies gripped Parrot’s shirt and moaned into the kiss. Each noise that sprouted from Wifies eased Parrot’s hesitation bit by bit. Wifies inched closer, the impending ache for Parrot’s love was fulfilled by the minute. Parrot prodded his tounge into Wifies mouth, now aggressively grabbing his face opposed to the gentle hold from before. Wifies repetitively whimpered into the kiss, it felt as if he was being fed a delicacy after being deprived of food for his entire life. Parrot climbed on top of Wifies and subconsciously grinded against his crotch. Parrot then suddenly pulled away, purely due to lack of oxygen.
“Holy shit bro.” Parrot panted.
Wifies giggled. “Better than any girl you kissed?”
“Hm, it depends. Have you done this with Derapchu too?” Parrot pried.
“You’re still thinking about that stupid stream?”
“Uh no, it was multiple streams, you guys do that queerbaiting shit all the fucking time!” Parrot seethed.
Parrot was still grinding against him, directing all his anger entirely into his dick.
“I shouldn’t even be entertaining this right now.” Parrot started again.
“I’m teaching you, aren’t I?” Wifies teased.
“This isn’t teaching me shit Wifies, all you’ve done the past few days is flirt with Derapchu and lead me on!”
“Oh really? Why don’t you teach me how to act then?” Wifies purred.
“Fuck you. Just—just take ur pants off already.” Parrot hissed.
Wifies serenely obliged, shucking off both his pants and boxers. He should’ve felt vulnerable when his dick was exposed, but all he felt was warm bliss erupt in his body.
Parrot let his fingers subtly run down his cock, the faint touch left Wifies aching for more.
“I’ve never touched another guys dick before Wifies…” Parrot admitted.
“Please just keep going. You’re doing amazing.” Wifies pleaded. “Please Parrot.”
Parrot gratified Wifies’ desires and grabbed his cock again—this time more aggressive.
“Take your shirt off.” Parrot ordered.
Wifies happily obliged again, lifting his shirt off and discarding it across the room. Parrot took the chance to shuffle forward and lap his tounge against Wifies’ nipple.
“Ohmy—god! Ah, g-good job baby.”
The praise awoke Parrot’s internal fantasies that he hid deep inside his soul. Wifies was really driving him crazy.
Parrot straddled Wifies’ lap, his own dick inches away from Wifies’. The tension and passion only warmed the room. Parrot slithered his hand down to Wifes’ dick and jerked it. The simple sensation surged instant electricity in Wifies’ body. Parrot continued to stroke Wifies’ dick repetitively while still mouthing at his nipple. His free hand coasted up Wifies’ body until he landed on the dry nipple. Parrot pinched and squeezed at the sensitive nub, giggling when Wifies moaned out of overstimulation. The constant piquancy drove Wifies’ mind into elated mush.
“Haah, fast—ngh! F-faster, pleease.” Wifies babbled.
Parrot sped up his hand that was currently stroking his best friend’s cock. Each fondle of Wifies’ dick took him to a state of pure, honest ecstasy. Every single movement Parrot perpetrated towards Wifies just drew him closer—to both cumming and his best friends heart. Parrot quickened his pace on Wifies’ cock, eliciting desperate whimpers from the boy beneath him. Wifies’ nipples were starting to become red and sore—only amplifing the stimulation further.
Salty, clear liquid began to stream down Wifies’ face, both his whimpers and tears flowed out endlessly. Parrot relentlessly jerked Wifies’ dick until it weeped aswell. All of Wifies’ senses stilled to focus entirely on the catastrophic pleasure erupting from his cock. And then it finally happened: comforting, creamy white substance sprouted from the tip of Wifies’ dick, staining both the sheets and Parrot’s dignity. Wifies pathetically moaned before collapsing down onto his pillow in total bliss.
“Ffuck…” Wifies huffed.
“I thought you were supposed to be teaching me.” Parrot mocked.
Wifies sluggishly sat up and looked at Parrot, a sly smile plastered across his face. Wifies opened his mouth to mack a snarky response just for Parrot to swiftly slip 2 digits into Wifies’ mouth.
“Mph—?!”
“Suck.”
Wifies wanted to speak, but still happily sucked on Parrot’s fingers, looking up at him with the most whipped eyes known to man. Wifies blissfully suckled on every patch of flesh that was shoved into his mouth willingly. As long as it was Parrot’s.
“Bro, you’re actually such a whore.” Parrot scoffed.
Wifies did an overdramatic glare upwards at him, clearly attempting to mock a hurt and innocent persona.
Parrot pulled his drenched fingers out of Wifies mouth and shoved both of them in his ass without warning. Wifies immediately gasped and threw his head back. The cold fingers plunged into his warm hole felt like the most refreshing thing ever. It was heaven, to have any sort of his love within him, to feel him—to feel Parrot.
“Haah…Parrot. I love you, so so so much.” Wifies muttered pathetically.
Parrot flushed at his genuine words, his dick ached between his legs, both his body and mind throbbed for Wifies.
“This is a pretty educational learning experience, yeah?” Parrot drawled while thrusting his fingers deeper in.
“Mm—ngh!” Wifies moaned.
Parrot felt his cock twitch at Wifies’ sounds—just his voice got Parrot off in general. Parrot plucked his fingers out of Wifies’ heat and let him breathe. Wifies pitifully lifted his head up and peered at Parrot with a smiled.
“I’ve wanted this for so long Parrot.”
Parrot flushed even harder.
Wifies leaned forward and unzipped Parrot’s fly, showing a patch of his boxers.
“Wifies…” Parrot muttered.
All Wifies did in response was shove his hand down Parrots pants and grab his dick.
“Wha—?!”
“Please Parrot, I need this, I need you in me.” Wifies begged.
Parrot stared in awe at the pathetic sight in front of him; Wifies looked like everything he had ever wanted. The self-proclaimed smartest minecraft player and Harvard student was groveling at his feet. Wifies seemed like the perfect guy to everyone else: conveniently attractive, inquisitive, funny. And here he was, begging for Parrot’s cock. The thought of such control made Parrot bubble with euphoria—such euphoria that it completely drowned out any sort jealousy or doubt.
“You really are pathetic aren’t you? Under that smart facade, you’re just a cock-slut.” Parrot murmured as he stripped off his pants and boxers.
The provocative act and words almost made Wifies drool. He was finally getting what he’d been yearning for after years of framing his feelings as ‘platonic’. Did Wifies seriously only need to make Parrot a little jealous for some dick? Wifies internally knew Parrot was more complex than that though—his complexity was one of the things that drew Wifies in. The only plausible explantation as to why Parrot would agree to this so quick would be that maybe—just maybe—Parrot had always wanted this too.
The moment when Parrot’s dick sprung out was when saliva actually started to roll out of Wifies’ mouth. Parrot wasted no time hiking one of Wifies’ legs over his shoulder and resting his hand on Wifies’ thigh, splaying Wifies’ hole on a silver platter for him. Wifies only giggled, looking up at Parrot seductively. Parrot felt his dick spasm in desperation. God he was whipped. Parrot spread Wifies’ cum from his prior orgasm over his dick before carefully lining it up with Wifies’ hole and slowly pushing the tip in.
As soon as they made contact, Parrot felt as if he was at the gates of heaven. The lingering thoughts in his mind were still portraying the act as wrong, yet his body received the sensation as perfection.
“Mffgh! S-so good!” Wifies mumbled out.
Parrot plunged the rest of his cock in, completely stretching Wifies out. Wifies let out a ragged moan that was louder than the previous ones. Parrot already felt as if he was transcending to another plane from just from being in Wifies. Wifies was completely weak—from both his orgasm and being filled.
“Mnnghh…” Wifies moaned.
Wifies was completely swallowed by Parrot’s cock, his entire mind gushed onto the feeling of Parrot being inside him. That feeling quickly vanished when Parrot pulled his dick out of Wifies’ weeping hole. Wifies whined due to the lack of warmth filling him. Luckily for him, that feeling was swiftly replenished when Parrot plunged back in, evoking pornographic worthy sounds out of Wifies. Parrot was drawn to the sense of control he got out of this; his idol for years was being a little slut, just for him.
Parrot proceeded to thrust in and out of Wifies while maintaining an agonizingly slow pace in an attempt to tease Wifies. To no surprise, Wifies was whining and moaning, pathetically itching to feel Parrot thrust in and out of him ruthlessly.
“Am I better than Derpachu?” Parrot taunted.
“Haah, as if i w-would do this with Derapchu.”
Parrot smirked and quickly hastened his pace, completely ruining Wifies’ hole and catching him off-guard. The feeling of superiority he had right now was addicting. The sight of Wifies’ hair haphazardly ruffled, his eyes lidded and teary, and his expression utterly pathetic gutted all of Parrot’s uncertainties about their relationship. Wifies was perfect. And that perfect boy was willing to do anything Parrot commanded.
Wifies dug his nails into both Parrot’s arm and the bedsheet beneath them, searching for any sort of harness. Parrot persisted his brutal pace, initating tears to fall from Wifies’ eyes again. Wifies so desperately wanted to just merge with Parrot; their souls were meant to be intertwined. Both of them eternally throbbed for one another, no matter how much Parrot hid it, he needed Wifies. Parrot wasn’t stopping until his cum was forever implanted in the boy trembling beneath him.
Wifies was undeniable perfection in Parrot’s eyes. Parrot just couldn’t get over the fact that the personification of beauty and brains was his and only his. Wifies completely gave his body to Parrot, he would devote anything and everything to Parrot. Both of them were addicted to the endless sensation of blending their essences together through sex.
Parrot could physically feel all of the pleasure of Wifies’ warm body and his thrusts blooming into something beautiful. Parrot suddenly felt a surge of energy and heightened euphoria crash through his body while warm liquid pulsed into Wifies’ hole. Parrot looked down at Wifies, god he looked so perfectly pathetic. His eyes were wide open opposed to the weary look he harbored prior, he was looking at Parrot as if he was a god. Parrot cherished the feeling of his idol—the person he admired most—limp with his cum. The room was left heavy with warmth and desire.
“You’re amazing.” Wifies muttered.
Parrot finally realized the absurdity of the situation. “Oh my god. We—we really just did that.“
“Yea.” Wifies commented as if they just did something that was completely normal for friends.
Wifies pulled Parrot down and shifted them to be facing eachother. Wifies gave Parrot a weak smile before burrowing his head into Parrot’s neck and succumbing to slumber. Parrot was left dazed with both bliss and bewilderment. He smiled too before kissing Wifies’ forehead and passing out aswell.
──── ୨୧ ────
Wifies woke up groggy and sore, the room too remembered their sex; traces of cum could be distinctly smelled. Wifies looked over to be met with the love of his life peacefully sleeping, he wished he could encapsulate this moment forever. Parrot looked like an angel—he was an angel. At least in Wifies’ eyes.
Wifies opened his phone to be met with about a million notifications from Derpachu. What the hell? Wifies opened them to be met with a line of repetitive: ‘bro what happened?’, ‘did you do the prank?’, ‘answer me dude’.
Wifies smiled deviously as he began to type back.
>
Wifies:
Don’t worry bro
the plan worked perfectly
>
Wifies took a picture of Parrot sleeping in bed next to him and sent it to Derpachu, clearly attempting to brag.
>
Derpachu:
YOO??
WHAT THE FUCK BRO
>
