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The port observation deck was quiet. It must have been well soundproofed; there was a reason that justicar, Samara, had chosen this deck for her meditations. The hum of the engines was barely audible here.
Liara leaned back against the elegant little sofa, crossing one leg over the other out of habit. It was fortunate that the military’s ever-present, grasping hands had not reached these cozy couches and replaced them with some hard wooden bench instead. They had already refitted the Normandy, Cerberus-built as she was, quite extensively; now no one aboard could have any doubt that she was, first and foremost, an Alliance warship, not a pleasure yacht.
Carving out a few hours of rest had taken no small amount of effort and a great deal of careful adjustment. Glyph had been immensely helpful in that regard: automated replies went out promptly, and all the necessary instructions to her agents were routed with flawless precision, requiring only minimal oversight. Now she could turn her attention to other projects… or rest, as Shepard had advised her to do.
Liara had decided to follow her advice, and for the first time in several days aboard the new ship, leave her cabin. The rare sorties with the squad did not count, as far as the asari was concerned; those were purely a matter of work, no different from her duties as the Shadow Broker.
The soldiers looked at her strangely. Garrus had hinted that the crew considered her unsociable and arrogant, but it hardly bothered her. She had grown used to that attitude among aliens, all the way back during her “service” aboard the first Normandy. Garrus, Tali, and the others had been regarded with suspicion then as well, but they had clearly mastered the art of socializing far better than she had. At the very least, they were sometimes invited out for drinks, or to shoot a few rounds at the range. Well, Goddess knew Liara had never felt comfortable among other living beings.
The asari sighed and poured herself a glass of levo-amino wine. She was not here for them. She was here to win the war.
She was here because Shepard needed her. Needed her more than ever. And it was not even about what was, obviously, happening between them. It was simply that Liara could help—and, more importantly, that she wanted to.
Wanted it as fiercely as…
Her lips touched the cool glass, and a pleasant fruity bitterness settled on her tongue. Back then, six months ago, Shepard had jokingly mentioned “a bunch of little blue children.” Liara knew she had not meant it seriously. The Commander had said it to bolster her morale. That habit, of course, was an integral part of any good leader.
Their relationship… or… whatever this was, was hardly serious enough to think about such things.
It was ridiculous, and yet she could not get it out of her head.
For all six months since then, she had wondered: could it truly be possible? The thought lingered at the edge of her consciousness, persistent but quiet, almost imperceptible amid the bustle of daily work. It did not distract her from her duties, did not hinder her in battle. It was simply there, somewhere nearby, warming the soul that had hardened and grown rough over the past couple of years.
Liara did not allow herself to dwell on it too much. Her mind had always been cool and pragmatic, and this thought… this future was too ephemeral, too fragile, to expect it in earnest.
What, in essence, did she and Shepard have? Shepard was the legendary captain of the Normandy, the dream of the entire galaxy, a savior, a protector, a hero. Liara was a simple archaeologist who, by some impossible turn of events, almost by accident, had taken the place of the Shadow Broker—and in doing so had become one of the most powerful forces in the galaxy. Too many obligations stood before them. Too much still had to be done.
How could one dream of something that, in such a reality, was almost impossible? Marriage, a warm home in some beautiful place, “little blue children”… and Shepard alive, calm and free, laughing, playing with them in the yard. Beside Liara. Forever.
Could there ever come a time when they no longer had to hurry somewhere, to save someone?
It would have been easy to cast the thought aside. To forget it, to take it for what it had truly been: a joke. If not for that fine, almost invisible thread stretched between them, taut and unbreakable as a string.
It was not something tangible. What lay between them was nothing like a raging river, nor a colorful kaleidoscope of feelings and sensations. Goddess, most of the time it was not even at the center of her thoughts.
It was simply…
Simply that Shepard always came back to Liara.
It was something like a constant.
Ever since the Commander had made her one foolish promise in a storage closet behind the med bay of a ship long since destroyed, she had always come back to her.
After Ilos. After the battle with Sovereign. After Saren. Even after death.
Although Shepard had not been beside her for most of the time that had passed since then, Liara had always felt her. Simply… known that Shepard belonged to her.
The asari flinched at the thought.
It was foolish. Shepard was free. She could be with whomever she wished. At least after Liara had refused to follow her on Illium. After she had refused her…
But for some reason Shepard had not started a new relationship. On the contrary, she had helped Liara—had quite literally saved the asari from herself, freeing her from a heavy, tormenting duty and that black thirst for vengeance.
As always, her inner voice hissed venomously.
More than that, despite the Commander’s wild popularity among her own crew, she had never even had a fleeting affair with anyone.
Liara would have known, of course. She was one of the best information brokers in the galaxy, after all.
Their bond had always seemed too strong. And despite the languid, desire-filled glances of rare acquaintances and chance encounters—some accidental, some not—Liara herself had never once considered binding herself to any of them. Joining with them as she had joined with Shepard.
Her heart, as humans said, was taken.
But what was all of it, truly? And what was it to Shepard? Did she feel the same? Or perhaps it was merely a side effect of melding, one that only asari could understand and feel?
Benezia might have been able to explain it to her. But she was no longer on this side of existence.
Still, Liara had a father now.
And despite the fact that the asari hardly knew her at all, for some reason, she trusted her. Matriarch Aethyta had said that everything between Liara and Shepard was wrong. She saw relationships entirely differently, not at all the way Benezia had spoken of them. Her mother had always spiritualized physical and mental intimacy, often reminding her how important it was—because every partner an asari took, she was forced to remember and quite literally carry within herself until the very end of her absurdly long life.
Aethyta, however, spoke of something else entirely. To her, intimacy was something simple and ordinary, and therefore stripped of any sacred meaning. Liara could not understand that, but she reasonably assumed that perhaps real… love, in some mysterious way, was supposed to reconcile both views.
And that was where the problem arose.
There truly had not been any…
What had her father called it?
Passion?
The mocking expression on Aethyta’s face seemed to have been seared into Liara’s eyes by the most powerful laser imaginable.
“How many times have you stripped her out of that uniform, thrown her into bed, and fucked her properly?”
Blood rushed sharply to Liara’s cheeks. She froze, feeling as though the air in the room had suddenly grown too dense.
Goddess, it was ridiculous.
She had thought so then, and she was certain of it now. It was ridiculous even to imagine. If only because, over the past couple of years, simply sleeping in a bed for the number of hours required to stay alive had already felt like an unforgivable luxury. What was there to say about sex?
Oh, perhaps she should have “stripped” Shepard out of her uniform while they were killing the Shadow Broker together? Or in the ruins of an ancient temple on the krogan homeworld, right beneath the claws of the Reaper attacking them?
Or here, aboard the Normandy—abandon her negotiations, her agents, her documents, and her tasks, all the things that might yet save the galaxy from inevitable destruction; drag the Commander away from yet another group of diplomats and arrogant generals, from whom she spent day and night trying to wring troops; tear off her damn jacket or combat armor and straddle her right there on the conference table?
Her heart skipped a beat.
The image of her own fingers greedily pulling Shepard’s clothes from her flashed through her mind like lightning, making Liara blush even harder.
She was so beautiful.
Her skin was astonishingly warm, and her hands and lips were impossibly gentle, impossibly tender, full of care. Liara would not have objected at all if those strong hands caught her by the hips and the Commander pressed her against the wall, with guards standing just on the other side, kissing her carefully…
Goddess, no.
They would never allow themselves such a thing.
Perhaps because it truly was not something… real?
Liara frowned and lowered her gaze to her glass.
What sort of wine was this? Why was it filling her head with such tangled thoughts?
She set the glass aside and drew a deep breath, trying to calm the scattered feelings wandering through her body with the rush of her blood.
The asari had only just managed to catch her breath when the entrance door opened with a soft hiss, and Tali stepped over the threshold of the compartment. She looked tired, but quite pleased with herself. Liara knew she spent nearly all her time down on the engineering deck, endlessly adjusting and readjusting the Normandy’s systems.
When she saw Liara, the quarian smiled brightly.
“Unbelievable! The legendary Dr. T’Soni in the flesh. I admit, I didn’t share Shepard’s hopes that you would actually manage to tear yourself away from work, even for a little while.”
With some effort, Liara stretched the tired muscles of her face into a faint smirk. She could only hope that the years spent behind her familiar mask of coldness and indifference had not gone to waste, and that she had managed to hide her confusion from the eyes of an old friend.
“I managed to briefly halt the avalanche of urgent matters,” she admitted, taking up her glass again and saluting her companion with a precisely measured, elegant nod.
Tali nodded back and settled onto the neighboring couch, stretching out her legs with obvious pleasure.
“Shepard is good for you,” she chuckled, and the asari felt her heart give another treacherous tremor. “Damn, Liara, are you blushing?”
“It is the wine,” Liara said sharply, and hurriedly lifted the glass to her lips to take a sip.
Although what she and Shepard had… their interaction, was not a real relationship, Liara liked, damn it, that their old friends saw it as something more. That was why she did not want to pursue the subject. The risk of losing even that tiny, pleasant little… thought? Hope? was too great.
Liara suppressed a sigh when she caught the far too knowing look behind the thick glass of her friend’s violet helmet.
“There is dextro-amino in the bar, if you want any.”
Tali snorted and leaned forward, fishing a narrow tube of blood-red liquid out of the pull-out refrigerator.
“Yes, I know. I do come here much more often than you do, after all.”
Her voice carried a gentle reproach, and the asari could not hold back her surprise.
Was the war not what all of them were supposed to be occupied with at all times?
“You are an admiral, Tali…”
“And you are the Shadow Broker,” the quarian said with a smile. With a light motion, she tapped the fragile edges of their containers together, then inserted a thin filter-straw into the special opening and cautiously sipped her drink. “It’s astonishing, what we’ve all become since the first Normandy, isn’t it?”
Liara nodded. Though she herself had meant something entirely different, it was difficult to argue with that.
“From naive, wide-eyed adventure seekers to cynical arbiters of the fate of an entire galaxy,” Tali grumbled, shaking her head. “Sometimes I wonder why. We all started from the same place, under Shepard’s command… and look at us now. I suppose Garrus is the only one who hasn’t changed all that much.” She laughed softly.
“Garrus too,” Liara sighed. “He has changed a great deal. He even had his own gang. Did you know?”
The quarian laughed.
“Oh, yes. I have heard those wild stories about his adventures on Omega more than once. Who would have thought sweet Garrus had that in him, hm? Archangel! The first time I heard that nickname, I laughed for far too long. But deep down, he is still the same kind soul.”
Liara tried to hide her smile, but did not particularly succeed. Glyph and EDI had long since brought her information about their relationship. More precisely, there was no relationship yet. Only… a certain mutual interest, an attraction. Liara was happy for them, though perhaps a little envious.
Tali narrowed her eyes.
“What?”
“EDI recently overheard his lecture on dextro-amino DNA. She said you were rather… intrigued.”
The admiral’s openly teasing gaze slipped quickly over her companion’s figure.
“Careful. She is still angry with you for refusing to reveal the secrets of asari sexual relations,” Tali parried. “She seems quite interested in the subject. She even asked Shepard…”
Liara felt a faint tremor low in her stomach.
It was not unpleasant.
“How strange that an advanced, self-aware AI is incapable of realizing that Shepard is not asari, isn’t it?”
Tali laughed, giving her friend an almost playful look.
“Indeed, T’Soni. I cannot imagine what could possibly have made her think to ask Shepard of all people.”
That was… that was irony, wasn’t it?
For some reason, Liara’s entire body seemed to burn and tremble with a strange, delighted nervousness. With the realization that, apparently, everyone truly did think of her and Shepard as…
“I was certain Joker had put her up to asking,” Liara said, shaking her head. “He sometimes asks very… tactless questions, Tali. I cannot always…”
The admiral smiled gently and tilted her head to one side.
“His jokes are only jokes. EDI, on the other hand, is interested purely for her own purposes. She is studying the fundamentals of interaction between two individuals who wish to enter into an intimate relationship.”
“Hm. Why would she need that?”
The quarian shrugged and took another tiny sip of wine.
“She must want to experience everything before the world burns in the fire of this war.”
The pleasant shiver broke off and was replaced by something cold and heavy, rolling with difficulty over her exhausted nerve endings.
They all believed it would happen, did they not? That everything they were doing now was futile, and the Reapers would go on destroying world after world? They would all die — Shepard, and their friends — and only Liara would remain. Well, perhaps Wrex as well.
Would they have to witness the end of this world?
Palaven burned before her eyes again.
The trembling, fragile dream the Commander had given her suddenly faded and lost its color, and Liara was truly frightened.
She closed her eyes, enduring a wave of sharp terror. Cold, clammy sweat slid unpleasantly down her back.
Funny.
Soon the world would burn in fire, and here she was, seriously reflecting on what exactly was happening between herself and Shepard.
Did it even matter…?
“Are you all right?” Tali’s voice sounded concerned. The admiral seemed to lean forward, trying to get a better look at her. “You look pale.”
“Yes, I…” Liara heard the rasp in her own voice with disgust. “I simply thought of… losses.”
“I’m sorry,” her friend said seriously. “That was awful of me.”
“There is a war on,” Liara said, opening her eyes and shrugging. “If we started choosing every word carefully enough to spare everyone’s feelings, we would have to remain silent around the clock.”
Tali laughed without much humor.
“Yes. I suppose you’re right.”
For a while, they sat in silence. The vast, cold emptiness still gaped in Liara’s chest, and it took considerable effort to force out a smile.
She needed a distraction.
“So what is going on between you and Garrus?”
“Trying to get even?” Tali grumbled without malice, and Liara managed a smirk that was almost natural.
It became a little easier.
Tali leaned back against the couch and stared thoughtfully up at the ceiling, as though searching for the right words.
“All right, all right. I think we… I think we are… drawn to each other. I don’t know why now, exactly. We have spent so much time on this ship, but it never got as far as lectures on the peculiarities of DNA before…”
They exchanged knowing looks.
The asari knew that feeling. Something very similar had happened to her back aboard the first Normandy, when she had gathered the last of her courage to confess her feelings to the Commander. Rumors had simply started to spread at the time, and Liara had decided it would be better for Shepard to learn of her embarrassment from Liara herself than to hear it gossiped about by privates and sergeants—or, worse still, by the members of her own squad.
“I am… happy for you,” Liara said uncertainly.
“It is a little early for that. I don’t know… how to hint at it,” Tali said, twitching one shoulder in embarrassment. “After all, I am not entirely sure that… that he feels the same.”
The admiral looked at Liara with such desperate hope that it almost stole her breath.
Goddess, did she truly think Liara could offer useful advice about relationships?
She remembered her own awkward attempts to explain herself to Shepard, her doubts, and her father’s words, and shook her head.
“I am not the one to advise you here, Tali. I am… terrible when it comes to… feelings. I simply say what I think and hope for the best.”
Tali looked at her with doubtful curiosity for a while, then nodded.
“Yes? Well, then I suppose I should simply…”
The compartment door opened again, and this time Garrus materialized in the doorway. His face was thoughtful, and he was tensely turning his datapad over and over in his fingers. When he noticed them, he froze, clearly embarrassed.
“Oh. Liara. I was looking for you, uh… in your office, but you are… here. Yes. Hello, Tali.”
“Hello,” the quarian said, her voice tight, her eyes shining strangely behind the thick glass of her helmet.
Liara suddenly felt a wild urge to laugh.
How could they be so blind? The attraction between those two was obvious, even to her.
“Hello, Garrus,” she greeted him, barely holding back a smile. “You were looking for me? Why?”
The asari did not miss the way the turian’s hand twitched almost imperceptibly, as if he had tried, for some reason, to hide the datapad behind his back. Garrus frowned, clearly annoyed with himself, and looked at her almost defiantly.
“I wanted you to… uh… help me. With my… research. I may have gotten a little carried away.”
“With dextro-amino DNA?” Liara asked softly, and heard Tali’s quiet laugh behind her.
Garrus narrowed his eyes.
“You know, I think I should go. You two definitely need to talk.”
***
The elevator came to a stop on the Normandy’s cargo bay platform with a soft hum.
Liara’s insides twisted with nervous anticipation. EDI had told her Shepard was here. After leaving Tali and Garrus to blush awkwardly on the observation lounge, the asari had been seized by a completely irrational desire to see the Commander, to hear her voice. After all, whatever their relationship truly was, it could certainly be considered, at the very least, mutual affection.
Shepard had said she wanted to continue what had been between them.
And there had been… a great deal.
“Dance, dance, Lola!” Liara heard James Vega’s deafening shout the moment the elevator doors slid open.
Shepard and Vega were in the middle of the vast room, moving slowly and gracefully in fighting stances, circling each other. Both were breathing hard, and the fight had clearly gone beyond a light warm-up. Despite the gloves both opponents wore, Liara’s sharp eyes could clearly make out that Shepard’s brow was split, while under Vega’s eye an impressive bruise was definitely beginning to bloom.
“You’re insane, Vega! Commander Shepard is about to wipe the floor with you!” Shuttle pilot Steven Cortez stood by the terminals, his arms crossed over his broad chest.
“Don’t you suck up from over there! Come on, Lola, you think I can’t kick your ass even in front of your cute little cheering section?”
“Shut your mouth, Lieutenant,” the Commander hissed through her teeth, turning her body.
Her fist slammed into Vega’s side with a dull thud, just beneath the ribs, making him grunt sharply. He did not lose his footing, though. He dodged hard to the right and threw two lightning-fast punches. Shepard staggered, barely managing to get her guard up in time.
Vega burst into mocking laughter.
“Getting old, Commander?”
Shepard, naturally, did not rise to the bait. Her green eyes tracked her opponent’s movements with careful focus. She moved lightly, though a little stiffly; fatigue was clearly taking its toll. Liara had long since noticed the dark circles shadowing her eyes. She knew the Commander had barely been sleeping lately.
Had she… thrown herself into this sparring match just to drive herself even further into the ground?
“Hello, Doctor,” Cortez said with a cheerful smile, holding out his hand. Liara shook it gladly. “You look worried. Something happen?”
Liara shook her head.
She liked the pilot. He was perhaps the only member of the crew who treated her with genuine warmth, without suspicion. She knew his story—his and his husband’s—and found it deeply tragic. And, if she was honest, for obvious reasons she took it far too close to heart. Before meeting him, she had never considered that humans formed relationships with people of their own sex. Cortez had not judged her curiosity; he had simply been a little surprised that Liara was interested.
“Apart from the war, everything is fine,” she attempted to joke.
The pilot hummed in understanding.
“You never rest. I’ll bet another galaxy-scale emergency brought you down here.”
Liara could not help smiling.
“Actually, no. I simply wanted… a slight change of scenery.”
A sly smile touched Cortez’s lips.
“Don’t tell me you want to join Vega for a sparring match.”
Liara shifted her gaze back to the fighters. They were striking each other with steadily increasing force. Their faces were focused, their eyes glittering with feverish intensity.
Vega was definitely losing ground. His size was no advantage in this fight; he moved considerably slower than Shepard, who danced around him. His hands could not keep up with defending his torso from the most unexpected angles, though he more than compensated for it with strength. Every blow of his that found its mark became a serious problem for the Commander. So Shepard moved at the very edge of her speed, trying not to give him the slightest chance to land a hit.
Liara had seen her in battle often.
And every time, the grace and precision of Shepard’s movements mesmerized her, sometimes making it far too difficult to concentrate on the danger threatening them. In those moments, the only thing that helped Liara was the thought that, if she kept drifting off into fantasy, she would not be able to protect the Commander.
That always sobered her.
“I am afraid I have neither the speed nor the skill,” Liara admitted, unable to tear her gaze away from Shepard.
Damnably beautiful, as always. Swift and strong.
Cortez chuckled, but did not comment. Then, suddenly, his eyes went wide and he threw up his hands theatrically.
“Oh, my God, Vega! Dr. T’Soni and I deeply disapprove of your interest in asari porn!”
“What?” Vega spun around sharply, and immediately took a powerful blow to the head that made him sway and slowly sink to the floor.
The trick was completely childish.
Liara snorted.
“What a dirty tactic, Steven,” she murmured without malice, glancing sideways at the pilot.
Cortez giggled quietly.
“Almost strange that he fell for it.” He winked conspiratorially. “Go collect your Commander. No need to thank me.”
Blood rushed to Liara’s cheeks for what felt like the hundredth time that day, and she smiled in embarrassment.
“Thank you anyway.”
Shepard, grinning broadly, pulled off her gloves and wiped the trickles of blood from her face with a careless motion.
“You get distracted by trivial things, soldier,” she said, offering her sparring partner a hand and helping him up.
“I’ll work on that,” Vega grumbled, shooting Liara a look from under his brow. “Doc, it’s not what you think, I—”
“Cortez made it up, Lieutenant,” Liara interrupted calmly, beneath the loud laughter of Cortez and Shepard.
Vega’s cheeks turned a delicate scarlet. It was such an endearing sight that the asari could not help smiling.
“Dug your own grave there, Vega,” Shepard said with a smile, clapping him peaceably on the shoulder.
“I just know how to appreciate beauty,” the lieutenant said with a grin, then winked wickedly at Liara, earning, at last, one more tiny smile from her.
***
In the captain’s cabin, Liara felt calmer.
Walking through the corridors beside Shepard, she had been unable to shake the feeling that everyone around them was watching her closely. Hungrily. Appraisingly. Perhaps even jealously. She had often witnessed awkward attempts to flirt with Shepard, and noticed the embarrassment the Commander inspired in her admirers.
And there were many of them.
Traynor’s and Allers’s persistent attempts to get into the Commander’s cabin under the most idiotic pretexts alone were worth something.
At some point, Liara had even begun to feel jealous.
It was strange to realize that none of them, oddly enough, had managed to win the Commander’s favor.
“Everything all right?” Shepard asked softly, settling more comfortably on her favorite couch opposite the enormous aquarium.
Liara felt a flicker of nervousness.
“Yes, I… wanted to discuss something with you.”
“Oh? Sounds serious.” The Commander grew slightly alert.
“It is… about the matriarch. Aethyta. I spoke with her.”
The way Shepard visibly relaxed at those words did not escape the asari’s notice.
Had she expected to hear something else?
“How did it go?” Shepard smiled, her bright green eyes sliding quickly over Liara’s body, making her feel a little too warm.
That was… distracting.
“She…” For some reason, her throat had gone dry. Liara took several quick steps across the room and stopped, clenching her fingers. “She said that… between us… everything is wrong.”
To her astonishment, Shepard smiled broadly.
She seemed to relax completely, looking at Liara with a tenderness so dizzying it almost stole her breath. Mischievous sparks danced in the depths of her bright green eyes.
“Yes, she told me that too. Even threatened not to let me within a light-year of you.”
Rage flared through Liara’s veins.
Her father had never appeared in her life, not once, but the moment she did, she had decided she had the right to…?!
“She said… what?” Liara hissed, forgetting her embarrassment for a second as she pinned the Commander with her stare.
Shepard laughed, throwing her head back. The asari’s gaze involuntarily caught on the pale, fragile line of her throat above the stiff collar of her Alliance uniform.
“‘Nobody gets to messing my little girl!’” Shepard giggled, imitating Aethyta rather convincingly, and earned an unwilling smile from Liara. “She doesn’t much like my service record, that’s all.”
“Cerberus?” Liara narrowed her eyes.
The Commander shrugged.
“Well, yes. But she and I very quickly became… uh… good friends. No need to worry. So what, according to strict Papa Bear, is wrong with us?”
Liara frowned, not entirely understanding the reason for the Commander’s amusement. Shepard behaved confidently, even a little flippantly, as though she truly did not attach much importance to the matriarch’s words.
“She… she said that…”
Her heart began to beat faster, and the cabin suddenly felt far too hot. Liara turned away so she would not have to see the amused expression on Shepard’s face, and tried to gather her thoughts. Making use of the advice she had given Tali proved not to be quite so simple.
The captain did not rush her.
At last, the asari drew in a determined breath.
“She told me that I should be dominant and… passionate. But I am not… And that, if… that is not there, if everything is… calm and proper, then it cannot…”
With every word, Liara felt more foolish. In the reflection of the aquarium, she could see her own flushed face. The heavy beat of her heart echoed in her temples.
It had been quite some time since such incidents had happened to her.
Perhaps, without exaggeration, this was the first time since…
Behind her came a rustle, then the sound of light footsteps. Shepard came up close behind the asari, her hands sliding carefully around Liara’s waist, embracing her and drawing Liara’s body back against her own, firm and steady.
Then the Commander gently settled her sharp chin on the doctor’s shoulder and closed her eyes.
“Sometimes I forget you’re only one hundred and nine,” she whispered softly, smiling.
Her hands stroked carefully along Liara’s sides, sending waves of nervous, heated trembling through the asari’s body. Or perhaps the cause was the monstrous tension knotting her shoulders.
“Shepard,” the asari whispered reproachfully, and closed her eyes.
Did she truly not understand that this was not the time for jokes?
The Commander’s hands stilled.
The pleasant weight on Liara’s shoulder disappeared, and she felt warm, dry lips touch her neck.
“Dominant and passionate, then,” Shepard murmured with a quiet smirk, and electric shocks ran through Liara’s entire body. She swallowed, her saliva suddenly thick.
She had never been able to resist that tone, that charm of the Commander’s. A pleasant heat gathered low in her abdomen. Liara exhaled shortly, trying to focus at least a little.
“To be entirely precise, she asked how many times I had… stripped you out of your uniform and…”
A short, warm laugh brushed against her neck, making the asari shudder.
“And?” Shepard’s voice had gone astonishingly low, and at the sound of it, arousal coiled inside Liara like a hard metal spring.
It was terribly vulgar, strange, and yet…
And yet Liara wanted desperately to finish the sentence.
“Thrown you onto the bed so I could…”
There was catastrophically little air. Liara fell silent, suddenly needing to breathe.
“Yes?”
“Do not make me say it aloud,” Liara whispered, squeezing her eyes shut. “I cannot…”
A nasty lump gathered in her throat. This was what Aethyta had meant, wasn’t it? She was not some fatal beauty, commanding bodies and minds. She was only… only…
Shepard kissed her cheek gently. Her arms drew their bodies together again.
“You are incredible,” Shepard whispered tenderly. Another wave of heat rolled down the asari’s spine at the words. “You are amazing. You do not have to try to be someone else to impress me.”
The tension in her shoulders eased, but Liara still had to understand this fully.
“But what if… it is not the way it should be?”
“Only you and I get to decide what it should be, Liara,” Shepard said softly, her hands wandering slowly over Liara’s body, sending waves of desire through every cell. “I am perfectly happy with what we have. Are you?”
Liara sighed, believing her.
Relief flooded her completely, and at last her body relaxed in the Commander’s warm embrace.
“Yes. I am too.”
“Except…”
Shepard gently turned the asari to face her, wrapping her arms around her again, and looked into her eyes with a faint smile.
“If you ever do decide to strip me out of my uniform, I would not object.”
She laughed softly at the look Liara gave her.
Familiar confidence and courage rushed back into every cell.
“What… what about now?” Liara asked with a smile, reaching for Shepard’s lips to give her a kiss that was anything but chaste.
Shepard responded instantly, kissing her back almost greedily. She always did it exactly like that, and every time it overwhelmed Liara, made her feel wanted and needed.
The asari’s fingers slipped into the Commander’s short red hair, gripping it tightly in her fist. Liara loved pulling at it, stroking it, feeling its coarse texture between her fingers. Sometimes she forgot herself and pulled too hard, and then Shepard would kiss her with even greater force, while the most dizzying sounds broke from her lips.
The trembling spring of tension inside her unwound at a frantic speed. Shepard’s hungry mouth slid along her neck, catching the delicate skin, leaving violet marks behind. The desire for the melding became almost unbearable, so strong and sharp it hurt.
Goddess, the last time they had done this felt like an eternity ago.
The memories flashed through her heated mind, and Liara’s breath caught.
“Shepard,” she forced out, finally tugging the Commander’s head back so she could capture her mouth in another kiss.
Strong hands gripped her hips in answer, pulling her closer. Liara could feel the heat of Shepard’s body through the dense layers of clothing, and she was dying to feel it nearer, stronger…
Shepard’s desire was no less powerful. Echoes of her nervous impulses wandered through the asari’s body, stoking her even further.
But Shepard was in no hurry. She went on kissing her, slowly, teasingly, stretching every movement into a dark, bottomless, all-consuming Eternity.
It was not enough.
By some miracle, Liara managed to find the fastenings of the captain’s uniform. Her impatient fingers tugged at them, desperate to reach bare skin. Shepard pulled away for a moment, allowing the asari to drag the heavy jacket from her shoulders and, with impatient, ragged motions, pull the edge of her uniform shirt free from beneath the wide belt. Beneath it, Liara could feel the tender heat of thin skin…
The air in the cabin suddenly became hot and dense as stellar gas.
The Commander wrapped both arms around the asari’s neck. Her fingertips slid gently over the nape of Liara’s neck. The simple caress sent electricity wandering down her spine. Liara touched her lips to the hard line of Shepard’s cheekbone, then moved behind her ear, pressing closer to catch the faint shiver of arousal that pierced her lover’s entire body.
Disheveled, half-undressed, Shepard clung tightly to Liara, as if holding on with the last of her strength.
She wanted to belong to her.
Wanted to be part of her.
Immediately. Now.
“Goddess, Shepard,” Liara gasped, feeling the wild pulse of biotics straining outward, shaking her entire being.
She needed so badly to… have her.
She all but pushed Shepard onto her own bed and loomed over her, almost roughly pressing her thigh between the Commander’s strong, long legs. Shepard hissed softly through her teeth, her hips lifting on instinct in an attempt to ease even a fraction of the unbearable tension low in her body.
It was… too much.
Liara’s vision darkened with the need to possess her, to take all of her, completely, without remainder. She pressed closer, flush against her, hardly allowing Shepard to move. Shepard exhaled sharply, yielding to the pressure, wrapped her arms tightly around Liara’s neck, and tipped her head back, baring her unprotected throat to the asari’s hot, uncontrolled kisses and bites.
With her free hand, blindly, she loosened her belt and unfastened it, allowing her lover’s deft fingers to slip unhindered beneath the dense fabric at her waist and touch the wet heat below, making Shepard jerk and spread her legs wider.
That power over her was intoxicating. Maddening.
And as if that were not enough…
“Liara, please,” the Commander moaned, pleading. Her fingers found the fastenings of the asari’s suit, releasing her from the restrictive fabric.
Hot skin met hot skin, and Liara felt Shepard against her, warm and trembling, and lost the last of her control.
She caught Shepard’s hands and pinned them to the bed above her head with one sharp movement. Their eyes met, and the asari was pulled, almost bodily, into the depths of the Commander’s mind.
The force of Eternity poured out of her body, wrapping around Shepard, engulfing her, slipping beneath hot, pale skin to spread there, fusing them into one whole, indivisible thing.
The world shuddered and shattered into a million pieces.
Desire. Belonging. Excitement. Want. Pain.
Love.
A little faster. Smoothly. Harder. Tension stretched and tightened, trembling and sparking in bright flashes. Pleasure came in soft, delicious waves. All the secrets of existence, thousands of years of evolution, were here, at her fingertips, simple and comprehensible in their elegant clarity.
Careful.
The pulsing Eternity took everything apart into atoms and then assembled it again into something new, something that had never existed before. Every cell filled with rapture and burned with the anticipation of an irresistible, inevitable, desperately desired release.
Her body tightened with sweet pain.
A little more.
More.
And more.
Everything around them burst into languid agony, and Liara drowned in the whirlpool of emotions and sensations, holding on with the last of her strength, clinging to Shepard and trembling violently.
Somewhere on the edge of it all, she heard someone’s hoarse, drawn-out moan turn into a cry.
The sense of air and texture against her skin returned to consciousness. Gentle hands held her exhausted body, firm and tender, soothing her.
“There, there,” the Commander whispered softly, and Liara finally became fully aware of herself again.
She was lying on top of Shepard in a thoroughly indecent state. They had not even undressed completely. Shapeless lengths of fabric hung from their overheated, damp bodies. Liara tried to lift herself, but failed; the muscles in her arms seemed to have turned to jelly.
“Don’t rush,” Shepard murmured affectionately, carefully stroking her back. “You need to rest.”
Her voice vibrated in her chest, resonating through Liara’s whole body in a pleasant hum.
“You are hurt,” Liara murmured, without opening her eyes.
“I feel good.”
The asari moved her hand and carefully touched one of the largest bruises Vega had left on her Commander’s body. Here, over two ribs at once. She knew it was there. She had felt the pain of it during the melding.
As she had felt many other wounds, physical and otherwise, covering Shepard’s body and soul. All of it was part of her, and the asari accepted it, though she would have done anything to ease the suffering it caused.
“It is as though a Mako ran you over,” Liara muttered, stroking the thin skin, still feeling faint sparks of someone else’s pain.
Reluctantly, she drew her hand away. Shepard already endured too much.
“Just a warm-up,” dry lips brushed a light kiss against her temple. “And you, if you keep working at this pace, are simply going to collapse in the middle of the next mission.”
Liara grimaced and carefully rolled off the Commander’s body. Her own problems, such as lack of sleep, seemed almost laughable compared to what Shepard carried on her shoulders.
Restless.
Strong.
She propped herself up on one elbow and examined her closely. Goddess, a few more bruises and she could easily be mistaken for an asari.
Shepard’s tender gaze slid over Liara’s body, making her blush faintly.
“You’re beautiful.”
The asari smiled shyly. She quickly stripped off what remained of her clothing, then turned her attention to Shepard, intending to make her sleep at least a little.
The Commander’s eyebrow, covered with a small strip of medi-gel tape, rose playfully. She smiled faintly.
“Getting a taste for it?”
Liara gave her an uncomprehending look — and immediately felt heat flood her face and chest. She remembered her own terrible behavior, her greed, her desire to possess Shepard.
Goddess. She must have seen it, when…
“Stop that,” the Commander laughed suddenly, reaching for Liara, catching her by the shoulder and pulling her sharply back against her. “Of course I saw it. That was exactly what I was trying to do,” she whispered conspiratorially into Liara’s ear.
Liara shuddered. With every melding, the residual effect of their joined consciousness lingered longer. It was normal, but still a little unfamiliar.
“Why?” the asari asked softly, pressing herself tightly against the firm, now fully bare human body of the Commander, though she already knew the answer.
“I wanted you to have no doubts left,” Shepard said gently.
Her warm palms wandered over Liara’s still-damp skin. They promised peace and comfort, protection and support.
Liara had never asked for them, but…
She did not need to.
She wished she could stretch these moments into an entire eternity, dissolve into them and remain still.
But that was impossible. In this universe, there was far too little time allotted to her and Shepard.
The asari closed her eyes, trying to fight the sudden bitterness that spread through her body at the thought.
“I believe you, Shepard,” she said, reaching out to gently comb through the Commander’s hair before pressing a quick kiss to her cheek. “Now sleep. I will be here.”
***
Liara woke suddenly and sharply, though she felt, surprisingly, fully rested.
Her head was resting on Shepard’s shoulder. She could hear her even, steady breathing, and hoped that at least now the Commander was not dreaming of nightmares.
The asari carefully, slowly lifted her head so as not to wake the sleeping woman. Shepard’s face was relaxed, but the exhaustion etched into it was plainly visible; the dark circles beneath her eyes stood out against her pale skin. Liara lightly brushed her fingers over the hollow of her cheek.
How she wished she could wake like this beside her every day.
And that Shepard were not so utterly worn down.
No. She must not fantasize about that. They had too much work to do. Perhaps later, when all of this was over, when they had won…
Liara preferred not to think about the fact that the battle against the Reapers would most likely end very differently.
Her gaze darted to the clock on the bedside table. She had managed to carve out four whole hours of sleep for herself and Shepard. Quite impressive, considering recent events. It even seemed a little strange that no one had tried to disturb them yet.
Did they look that terrible? Then again, only the laziest person aboard had not gossiped about the Commander’s lack of sleep.
Liara sighed heavily, quickly checking her urgent messages. There were only two of them, both from the Terminus Systems, which meant she might still have around fifteen minutes to shower and gather her thoughts.
When she came out of the bathroom, she found Shepard fully dressed. She was sitting at her personal terminal, rapidly typing out some message. Liara came closer and gently ran her hand through Shepard’s red hair, still tousled from sleep, putting it into some semblance of order.
“Of course. I should not have hoped you would keep sleeping.”
“It’s not as cozy without you,” Shepard smiled with one corner of her mouth, though her brows remained drawn together. “Besides, Traynor has practically buried the log in messages about the scan results from this system. Looks like we have a lot of work here.”
As if it were ever otherwise.
The cold anxiety that had become so familiar over these months had already returned to every nerve, every cell of her body, forcing her to gather herself and be ready to throw herself into battle at any second.
“You can do this,” Liara said quietly, and turned resolutely toward the door, ready to leave the Commander’s cabin and focus on her own work again.
“We can do this,” Shepard murmured thoughtfully to her back, and the asari’s heart felt a little warmer.