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Ilya couldn’t figure out how he’d ended up in this absolute trainwreck of a situation. It was supposed to be a chill night out with friends – relaxed, an opportunity to catch up. It was not supposed to be an insanely risky social landmine. If Ilya didn’t navigate this correctly, he feared Shane would spontaneously combust. Actually, looking at him now, maybe it’s more likely he would sink so far into his seat that he would fall into another dimension – never to be seen again.
“Dude! Seriously, how long has it even been since you’ve been laid? We just want to help!” JJ said jovially, poking Shane in the shoulder.
“Help how, JJ?” Cliff smirked at him.
“Oh, shut up dude, not like that. We’re just trying to find our buddy some ass. Or wait, dick?” JJ paused, considering. “What part are you more into?”
Ilya could see the sweat droplet forming on Shane’s brow.
Ilya did a quick scan of the table, trying to decide his move. They were at a semi-circular booth at a swanky bar in downtown Montreal. Ilya and his teammates had the day off, so Ilya invited them to meet his old teammate Cliff – who was in town for his game against the Metros. It had started out as a great night – Ilya knew Cliff would get along well with Wyatt and Troy. What Ilya really hadn’t expected was for his (secret) boyfriend to show up with his idiot friends. Apparently, Hayden and JJ had dragged Shane out after their game, insisting he needed to hook up, and coincidentally ended up here. Wyatt, of course, had invited the group to join them – “the more the merrier!” he’d exclaimed.
And now, Ilya sat in the middle of the table, watching his worlds collide.
“If you’re trying to get your friend a hookup, why’d you come to this place?” Troy asked, sipping the vodka Ilya had ordered for him.
“What’s wrong with this place?” Hayden said, gazing around at the lush couches and dim lighting, as though he’d find an obvious flaw.
“Well, it’s not very gay,” Troy responded simply. “Montreal has like a million gay bars. You could have gone to one of those.”
JJ arched his eyebrow. “Shit. Yeah – should we go to one of those?” He looked at Shane.
“Fuck off, JJ,” Shane mumbled.
Ilya finally found his voice, realizing he was in this situation now. He’d better figure it out. “Here Hollander, have this vodka. Maybe it’ll make your shitty friends disappear.” Ilya slid a glass to Shane.
JJ scoffed and Hayden grumbled.
“I don’t drink vodka,” Shane said, meekly, not meeting Ilya’s eyes.
“You do tonight,” Ilya said firmly, trying to send him a silent message, which was difficult, since Shane hadn’t even looked at him since arriving. If Shane would just follow his lead, he could get him through this.
The conversation shifted to alcohol for a few minutes. Cliff started chatting about a winery he went to with his new girlfriend out in California, while JJ pretended to know a lot about wine. Ilya took a moment to defend the irreplaceability of Russian vodka, and Shane made a few comments about the harmful effects of even small quantities of alcohol on your liver – as he faithfully sipped his drink. Ilya couldn’t help grinning a little at Shane’s obedience – his boyfriend loved nothing more than to do a good job.
“Another round for the table?” The waiter interrupted, a tall man with dark swept hair.
“Yes – keep them coming,” Ilya responded without hesitation. He did wish he had a better strategy than alcohol, but he had to do what he had to do. He needed his boyfriend to survive this evening.
“What about him?” Troy said, leaning in toward the table, looking at Shane as the waiter walked away.
“Him what?” Shane looked back and forth, blinking rapidly. Ilya kicked his foot under the table – hoping it would be received as supportive. Unfortunately, all it accomplished was making Shane jump in a completely unsubtle way. Cliff looked at Ilya questioningly, but Ilya avoided his gaze.
“Like, you know, to hook up with? He’s hot.” Troy shrugged.
“Hmm, yeah, actually – he could be an option,” Wyatt added. “He seems nice - we had a good chat with him when we first arrived.”
“Oh yeah, and he was totally checking you out!” Hayden said. Ilya was certain Hayden had no idea what checking someone out even looked like.
“Do you even know what checking someone out looks like, Pike?” Ilya grumbled.
“Fuck off, Rozanov,” Hayden groaned.
Ilya shifted in his seat. Was he really at a bar right now, listening to his friends try to set his boyfriend up with an ugly waiter?
“And anyways, he is not hot,” Ilya said, shaking his head.
“Nah, as the only other gay guy at this table, I get authority on this issue, and I say he’s hot,” Troy responded, tone light and teasing.
JJ was peering around the corner of the booth, clearly trying to assess the waiter from a different angle. “Yeah, I can see it,” he said, agreeing.
Ilya set down his vodka, a bit too firmly. “No, he’s tall. He looks like a tree,” he said, vehemently.
Cliff smiled and raised his eyebrows. “You’re tall, Roz.”
Ilya rolled his eyes. “Yes, but I’m tall and thick.” Shane gagged a bit on his drink. Ilya took a quick glance at Shane but continued. “Not a string bean, like that tree man.”
“I don’t know if that makes any sense, Roz,” Wyatt said, giggling now.
“Okay, wait, forget the tree-man for a second,” JJ tried to take control of the conversation again. “What about you two?”
“What about you two who?” Shane said, probably too quickly, glancing from JJ to Ilya.
“Barrett, obviously,” JJ said, exasperated. “Like he said! He’s the only other gay guy here. So why are we even looking? You two could be off hooking up right now.”
Shane’s abject paleness rapidly changed to a deep blush, but he still spoke up. “What the fuck JJ! Didn’t I tell you when I came out that the first rule of having a gay friend was to not immediately try to set him up with only other gay guy you know?”
Wyatt hadn’t stopped giggling, clearly finding JJ’s absolute cluelessness hilarious. Troy laughed too.
“He’s right – that is a thing,” Troy said.
“Well look, you guys are getting along already!” JJ obviously wasn’t going to give up that easily.
Ilya felt uncomfortably hot. Was it possible for blood to literally boil?
“Wait, Roz, is Troy hot enough?” Cliff said, nudging Ilya in the side. “Or does he look like some sort of plant, or other nature-related item I wasn’t aware of?”
Ilya huffed, trying to form his next words without sounding absolutely unhinged. Troy was objectively hot – everyone knew that – but he was still not hot enough for Shane Hollander. And what was Ilya even talking about? He wasn’t trying to set up his boyfriend! Would his friends please stop trying to set-up his boyfriend?
Luckily, JJ wasn’t patient enough to wait for Ilya to respond. “So???” he said, questioning Troy.
“Oh, well, I’m flattered Boiziau, but I have a boyfriend.”
“A boyfriend like Shane Hollander? Did you know he’s the number one player in the league?” JJ reached over to shake Shane by the shoulders, trying to hype him up. Shane held on to his glass of vodka tightly, preventing it from spilling while he was rocked from side to side.
“Sorry dude – I’m a one-man kind of guy,” Troy smiled, probably thinking about Harris. “But, don’t take any offence Shane – you’re like super hot.” Troy paused briefly. “I actually asked Roz for your number when I first got traded to the Cens.”
“Oh god,” Shane dropped his forehead to the table. His cheeks were the same colour as the red velvet cushions now.
Ilya growled. Cliff looked at him again, so he turned it into a cough – at least he tried to.
“Fuck! I knew it! You guys would have been perfect together!” JJ said, angrily. “Roz, why didn’t you give him Shane’s number? It would have been perfect!”
Shane had lifted his head again and was now gulping down the remainder of his vodka, throwing caution to the wind.
“Barrett and Hollander? Together?” Ilya replied, shaking his head. “Nope. Bad. No.” Ilya tried to sound like a thoughtful and supportive friend, who took matchmaking seriously.
“Wait, why didn’t you give him my number, Rozanov?” Shane looked at Ilya, for the first time tonight, a glimmer of something in his eyes.
Ilya clenched his teeth. He might be irrationally jealous, but he wasn’t one to back down to a challenge from Shane. “He’s not your type.” Ilya shrugged – definitely nonchalant, now.
“He’s too nice.”
“Isn’t that a good thing?” Troy asked the table.
“And too short,” Ilya continued.
“Hey!” Troy exclaimed. “I’m average height!”
“It s’ok Barrett. You’re hot – but still short.”
Cliff looked at Ilya again and then turned his attention to Shane. “You only go for a very specific height range or something, Hollander? The waiter is too tall, and Barrett is too short – so, like, what are the height requirements here?”
Shane’s eyes went wide. “No – I never – no. Troy isn’t too short!”
“Wait, so you are interested?” JJ asked Shane, thankfully interrupting and pulling Cliff’s focus.
“What? No – I mean – Troy, you seem great. And like, yeah, you’re attractive for sure, but uh… ” Shane was panicking now. He turned back to JJ, looking for an escape hatch. “He has a boyfriend!”
Ilya fisted his napkin into a tight ball. Since when did Shane think Troy was hot?
Shane grabbed JJ’s vodka out of his hand and took a gulp. JJ looked at him and laughed.
“How serious is this boyfriend?” Hayden said, clearly not wanting to miss an opportunity where Shane had potentially shown some interest.
“Very serious,” Ilya spoke up before Troy could respond. “Harris is ride or die.”
Troy immediately spent the next several minutes gushing about Harris – how smart and funny he is, how he has the best laugh, how he smells like apples, and how good he is in bed. Ilya wished he could tell everyone how good Shane is in bed. And how he smells like laundry soap and hockey tape, with a hint of jockstrap – but, like, in a good way. Ilya decided he should probably actually never tell anyone that.
Shane’s eyes were a bit glazed over now, like he was dissociating. The vodka was probably working – given that Shane had drank his three rounds, and one of JJ’s.
“How’s that work, anyway?” Hayden asked, politely.
“How’s what work?” Troy replied, taking another sip of his vodka. Everyone’s lips were a bit loose now.
Hayden squirmed slightly in his seat. “Oh, uh, like, gay sex?”
Troy started laughing and Wyatt guffawed.
“Dude, what?” Cliff said. Maybe Ilya shouldn’t have ordered that last round of vodka for the table.
“Like – wait! I know like, the basics, or whatever. But how do you…” Hayden took a gulp of his drink. “How do you decide who does what?”
Shane turned to stare at his best friend, bewildered. “Dude,” he said.
“What?? I can’t ask you this shit. You never tell me anything!” Hayden replied, defensively.
“I wonder why,” Shane said, under his breath.
“It is not difficult, Pike. Some people want to fuck, other people want to be fucked. You just ask.” Ilya replied without much consideration to how this might sound. Maybe he especially shouldn’t have had a 4th vodka? Or was it his 6th?
“Or –“ Troy added, clearly not fazed by Ilya’s knowledge on the topic, “Sometimes you want to fuck and other times you want to be fucked. Can be situation dependent.”
“I think I’d want to do the fucking. I don’t think I’d want someone, you know, putting something up there,” JJ said, seriously.
Shane started shaking his head, too enthusiastically. “No, no. You can’t knock it till you try it.”
The whole table started laughing.
“And what, you’ve tried it?” JJ said, raising his eyebrows.
Ilya let out an awkward puff of air as he tried to contain a laugh. Shane didn’t bother containing it, he just laughed.
“What, JJ? You think I’m a virgin?” Shane was grinning now, clearly entertained by this development. Ilya knew this wouldn’t normally entertain Shane.
“Well, like, I dunno man,” JJ said, immediately trying to backtrack. “Like I know you’ve been with girls or whatever, but we’ve literally never seen you take home a guy.” JJ looked to Hayden, silently begging him for support. All Hayden provided was a half nod.
“Oh, I’m definitely not a virgin,” Shane said, back to shaking his head. “Nope, nope, nopeee.” Oh, no. Shane’s last nope was definitely slurring. “Actually, I had sex today. This morning. Twice.”
Ilya’s hand flew forward – he’s not sure what his plan had been. Probably to manually seal Shane’s lips together – but in the process he knocked over his glass, spilling vodka across the table.
“Oh, shit, Ilya! That’s your favourite vodka,” Shane said, looking crestfallen.
Ilya chuckled awkwardly, grabbing Cliff’s napkin from his hands to wipe up the mess. Cliff was smiling broadly.
“Yes, sorry, arm spasmed,” Ilya said as a weak attempt at an excuse.
Just then, the waiter arrived to help address the spill.
“I don’t think you look like a tree,” Shane said, eyeing the waiter seriously.
“Oh, uh, thank you, sir.” The waiter said, confused.
“No, actually, I usually like to be the one saying ‘sir’” Shane winked. Oh no, Shane was winking.
“OKAY!” Ilya said, standing. “Hollander, sorry, I got some of that vodka on your shirt I think.” Shane looked down at his dry shirt, confused. “Quick trip to the bathroom – okay?” Ilya’s eyes were wide, staring at Shane and hoping he’d play along.
“Ohhh, okay,” Shane said, a mischievous smile forming on his face.
Ilya shoved his way out of the booth. Wyatt and Troy couldn’t stop giggling at Shane’s antics. JJ rose, allowing Shane out of the booth so he could follow Ilya to the bathroom.
Ilya rounded the corner into a private bathroom, dragging Shane behind him. As soon as the door was closed, Shane pressed Ilya up against the wall and kissed him. Ilya wanted to stop Shane, to demand he get his shit together, but he figured he could still do that in a few minutes. He returned the kiss, letting his hands roam down Shane’s back. Shane’s hands found Ilya’s hair, fisting his curls desperately. Ilya moaned into Shane’s mouth, as Shane rutted his hips against Ilya’s, letting him know how turned on he was. The press of Shane’s erection against Ilya’s thigh snapped him to attention. He grabbed Shane’s shoulders, pushing him back and steadying him.
“What are you doing?” Shane said, looking genuinely disappointed.
“Stopping us from hooking up in this bathroom,” Ilya said.
“I thought that’s why we were in the bathroom?” Shane said, briefly looking around, to see if maybe there was an alternative explanation.
Ilya couldn’t help but laugh. “No, moy lyubimyy, we are in the bathroom to stop you from outing us to all of our friends.”
“WHAT?!” Shane exclaimed. “ILYA! Why would you out us to all our friends?”
“Oh god, moy lyubimyy… Why did I give you vodka?” Ilya lamented.
“I hate vodka,” Shane said, gagging a little.
“Shane – you must listen to me. I know your friends are idiots, and trying to get you laid right in front of me, but you have to shut this down, okay? You’ll say something you can’t take back.”
Shane just nodded and shrugged quietly, his gaze shifting to Ilya’s lips and his body swaying forwards. Ilya sighed.
“Okay? Shane? Sweetheart?”
“Mmmhmm.” Shane whispered into Ilya’s ear.
If Shane was too drunk to listen to reason, Ilya would have to use his only foolproof defense – sex.
“Okay, Shane.” Ilya used his sexiest voice. “If you are a very good boy tonight – if you don’t tell anyone our secrets – I will fuck you so good. I’ll come to your apartment later and slam you into the mattress until you scream.”
Shane groaned.
“But you have to be a good boy, okay? Can you do that, sweetheart? Can you keep a secret?”
“Yes, sir,” Shane smirked, his eyes full of heat.
“Okay, can we go back out there now?”
Shane gave Ilya a salute.
Ilya was nearly certain this wasn’t going to work.
Shane and Ilya returned to the table, after a moment of standing on opposite sides of the bathroom to ‘cool off’.
Luckily, the conversation had moved on – Wyatt was bragging about his wife, Lisa, and her recent promotion to an attending position at her hospital. Ilya slid back into the booth. Cliff watched him settle in his seat. “Hollander okay?” he asked quietly.
Ilya glanced at Cliff. “Yeah, just a bit drunk is all,” Ilya said, giving him a piece of the truth.
“I kind of forgot you guys were friends now, or whatever.” Cliff said it like a question.
“Yeah, friends,” Ilya nodded. He raised his voice, joining back in on the conversation, not wanting to answer any more of Cliff’s probing questions. “Can’t believe you pulled Lisa, Hazy. She’s far too good for you.”
“I know,” Wyatt responded, sighing happily.
“So how do I get whatever that is?” JJ said. “I think I’m ready to get wifed up, you know? But I can’t find that,” he said, gesturing to Wyatt and his dreamy eyes.
“You gotta like, actually put some time into getting to know someone,” Cliff offered.
Shane started nodding along. Cliff narrowed his gaze, watching Hollander’s agreement.
“What about you Rozanov? Interested in settling down?” JJ asked, looking intently at Ilya.
“Oh, uh…” Ilya’s eyes tracked to Shane automatically, but he looked away just as quickly. “I’m not really looking for a woman right now.” Ilya decided to stick with partial truths – they always worked better than a full lie.
“Retiring the playboy lifestyle?” Hayden said.
“Actually, Rozy isn’t really like that.” Wyatt said, defending his friend. “I mean – I know that used to be his rep or whatever. But he’s, like, shockingly low-key now. We can never get him to go out – he’s always holed up at home.”
“God – Shane is exactly the same,” Hayden said. “We had to literally drag him out here tonight.”
Shane giggled. He glanced at Ilya, biting his lip, as though proving his excellent behaviour. Ilya tried to hide a groan.
“I am not low-key, Hazy. I am the most exciting. I just don’t tell everyone my business,” Ilya said.
“I dunno Roz, you’re actually kinda boring,” Troy said, amused.
Ilya gasped.
Shane laughed hard. “Boring!” He cried, between chuckles. Hayden slapped him on the back, as though he was choking.
“I have never once ever been boring!” Ilya exclaimed.
“Actually Roz, they might be on to something,” Cliff said. Ilya gasped again, glaring at his ‘friend’.
“Well, sure, in Boston you had your glory days. But I always knew there was a soft side to you…” Cliff’s eyes were shimmering now. “And I know people said you were a playboy, but even then, we all knew you only had eyes for one person.”
Ilya took a sharp inhale.
“Who?” Hayes and Troy said, leaning forwards to hear Cliff’s response.
“Dunno,” Cliff shrugged. “We never met them.”
Ilya noticed Cliff’s use of gender-neutral pronouns. Uh-oh. This was bad.
Cliff continued. “We’d just see little Rozy, all of 18 years old, staring at his phone with heart eyes. Always texting the same person for years… Actually, they lived in Montreal!” Cliff said, just remembering, maybe. “He would always ditch us in Montreal and come back looking like a new man. Never gave us any details though.”
Ilya swallowed.
“Hey! That’s funny – Shane had the same thing with some chick in Boston.” Hayden said. “Always texted, always these clandestine hook-ups,” Hayden chirped, nudging Shane. “Actually…” Hayden paused. “Shit, was she even a chick?”
Shane rolled his eyes. “No, Haydennnn.” Shane whined Hayden’s name, like a petulant child. “She is definitely not a chick.”
Oh. Fuck. Ilya’s mind was working overtime, trying to figure out how to get out of this.
“Ha!” Hayden laughed. “Shit – I’m such an idiot. Can’t believe I thought Boston Lily was a girl this whole time.”
The table fell silent. Ilya’s eyes shot to Shane. Shane was tracing his finger through a remnant of spilled vodka on the table, oblivious to the fact that their entire private life had probably just been exposed.
“Boston Lily?” Cliff said, quietly.
“Yeah – that’s what she was called in his phone, anyways,” Hayden said, still chuckling. God, why did Shane have such dumb friends?
“Ummm, maybe we should get another round? I can call the waiter back over here,” Troy said, straightening up. Obviously, Troy had already figured it out. Probably half-an-hour ago during the ‘vodka incident’. But, if he didn’t know then, he definitely knew now.
“That’s funny though,” JJ said, like Hayden, apparently having no idea what was going on. “Shane and Rozanov both having long-term secret hookups in each other cities. Ha!”
“Maybe we should just get the check?” Wyatt chimed in, eyes wide, joining Troy’s strategy of distraction and avoidance.
“What was Rozanov’s girl called?” JJ said, clearly just trying to prevent the lull in the conversation, still having no idea why there was a lull.
Cliff sighed, avoiding eye contact with everyone.
“Montreal Jane,” Shane said, distractedly, still swirling vodka on the table. Everyone stared at Shane, shocked.
Ilya groaned, letting his head fall back onto the bench seat. “Fuck,” he said, at full volume.
“What?” Shane said, lifting his head. “It’s a foolproof pseudonym.” He smiled.
Ilya shook his head, smiling a little at his dumb, drunk boyfriend.
Shane’s grin took over his whole face. “Oh, who cares, Rozanov. They already figured it out,” he said, gesturing to Troy, Hayes and Cliff.
“Figured what out?” JJ said. Hayden looked at Shane too, quizzically.
“Oh, just that Ilya and I have been fucking for, like, a decade.” Shane said, nonplussed.
JJ’s jaw dropped. Hayden let out a weird, choking sound. Troy started laughing, but it also sounded like he was crying. Wyatt and Cliff looked at each other, huge smiles taking over their faces.
“He’s who I had sex with this morning,” Shane continued, oblivious to the table’s reactions. “Twice.” He added cheerfully.
Ilya let his head drop to the table, mimicking Shane’s coping mechanism from earlier in the evening. “Shane, moy lyubimyy, when you regret this tomorrow you cannot be mad at me.” Ilya lifted his head, meeting the gaze of his friends (and JJ and Hayden). “Let the record show – I tried to stop him.”
“Not very successfully,” said Cliff.
“It was probably the vodka’s fault, baby, not yours,” Shane replied.
“Baby?” JJ said, turning to Hayden, incredulous.
Shane continued. “You know I can’t have vodka. Do you remember what happened in Vegas when we had vodka? Remember, I…”
“SHANE!” Ilya said, standing up awkwardly, making the table rattle. Ilya shooed Wyatt and Troy aside, so he could exit the booth, and then made JJ relocate to the other side so Ilya could sit beside his boyfriend. At least he was close enough now to physically cover Shane’s mouth. Shane immediately leaned into Ilya.
“I’m not even that drunk,” he mumbled. “I’m just sick of these two trying to set me up.” Shane turned his gaze to JJ, glaring now. “I. Have. A. Boyfriend.” Shane enunciated every word.
JJ laughed. “Shit, okay, man. My bad!”
“Wait – him?” Hayden said, liked he’d just arrived to the conversation. “HIM?”
“Yes, Pike, me,” Ilya grumbled.
“Did you say a decade?” Wyatt asked, calmly.
“More or less,” Shane responded. “Since we were 17.” His eyes were half-closed now, his full weight leaning on Ilya.
“Since just before our rookie season,” Ilya said, sweeping Shane’s hair out of his eyes.
“Wait, you’re Boston Lily???” Hayden said, still sounding confused.
“Lily – Ilya. And Shane – Jane.” Cliff said slowly, basically spelling it out.
Ilya shrugged. “They were good names.” He felt his pseudonyms deserved some defense. They worked for many years, after all.
“How the hell did this even happen?” JJ asked.
“Well, JJ, Shane is very gay.” Ilya said dryly. Shane elbowed Ilya in the side. “And I am bisexual. And we are both very hot. It was not – what do you say?” Ilya glanced at Wyatt.
“Rocket science,” Wyatt finished his sentence. Ilya nodded in agreement.
“And you’ve been together-together for all this time?” JJ asked. His mouth still hadn’t closed.
“Well, at first it was just casual. Hook-ups. But not now - not for the past few years.” Ilya explained. Ilya had intended to keep talking, but Shane cut him off.
“Oh, fuck, Ilya! Did I lose the bet?” He exclaimed, suddenly remembering something.
Ilya looked down at his boyfriend. “What bet?” Ilya regretted asking the moment the words left his mouth.
“When we went to the bathroom – you said you’d fuck me into the mattress if I was good, but I think I fucked it up, right?” Shane sounded so earnest.
Wyatt let out a bark, while Troy looked like his brain had officially gone offline. Hayden groaned. Ilya grinned – wow, this was a disaster.
“Well, I guess that answers my question about whether you like dick or ass more,” JJ said, thoughtfully.
“Oh, hmm, well yeah that’s true…” Shane said, just as thoughtfully. “But Ilya’s actually got an incredible ass. You should see it. It’s so round and…” Shane made a grabbing motion with his hands. “But we don’t usually put anything up there…”
Ilya put his hands over Shane’s mouth. Shane licked his hand, but Ilya didn’t budge.
“I am protecting you from yourself, Shane,” Ilya chuckled.
“Actually, Hollander, I have seen his ass – and you’re right – it’s a good one,” Cliff said, struggling to get out his words between his laughs.
“THANK YOU CLIFF!” Shane yelled, muffled under Ilya’s hands.
“So, uh, anyways, Ilya - is this why you signed with Ottawa?” Wyatt asked, kindly guiding the conversation back to safer territory. Ilya tentatively removed his hand from Shane’s mouth.
“Yup,” Shane said, popping the ‘p’. “The summer before Ilya was a free agent, he finally locked this down –“ Shane moved his hands up and down, gesturing to himself. “And then said he’d move here,” Shane paused, possibly for dramatic effect, “for me!”
“Geez Roz, that’s actually kinda romantic,” Cliff said. “Good on ya.”
For a moment everyone was silent, digesting this new information. Shane reached for his vodka, and Ilya swatted his hand away. Instead, he wrapped an arm around Shane and tucked him further into his side.
“This stays here. Doesn’t leave the table. Yes?” Ilya said, tone serious.
Everyone nodded in agreement, providing assurances they wouldn’t say anything.
“Wow, I can’t believe you kept this a secret all this time,” Wyatt said, shaking his head in disbelief.
“Apparently not a complete secret,” Ilya said, looking at Cliff.
“Hey – I didn’t know, know. I just, had my suspicions,” he replied.
“How’d you figure it out?” Troy asked.
“Well, like I said, the heart eyes, mostly. And if it was girl, I think he would have told us eventually. And - we used to go out a lot. It wasn’t exactly a state secret that Ilya was also into guys.” Cliff explained.
“Really?” Ilya asked, curious.
“Well, I mean, I think most people just blew it off as nothing. You know – ‘oh, that’s just Roz, he can flirt with anything that moves’ – that sort of thing.” Ilya grinned, proud. “But, look Roz, we spent a lot of time together. I noticed you drop out of the odd club or two with a guy.”
Shane popped his head up, turning sharply to Ilya. “What’s this?”
“Mmm, don’t worry about moya mikrovolnovka,” Ilya said soothingly, pulling Shane back down to his shoulder. Shane grumbled something about a microwave under his breath, followed by something in Russian.
“Did Shane just speak Russian?” Hayden asked JJ, before Cliff continued.
“Anyways, man, sorry I wasn’t trying to out you – or anything, before. I was just kind of figuring this out in real time, you know?” Cliff said.
“It’s okay, Marly,” Ilya replied.
“So do you guys have a plan – to come out, I mean?” Troy asked.
“Hmmm. Maybe after the playoffs this season,” Ilya said tentatively. “Originally we were going to wait until after we retired –“
“But that plan sucked,” Shane chimed in, sleepily.
“Shit, yeah, that’s a long time to wait.”
“And people would have figured it out anyways, after the wedding,” Shane mumbled, speaking mostly into Ilya’s shoulder.
“Wait – what did he say?” Wyatt asked.
“Who’s wedding?” Hayden said, looking around the table.
Ilya couldn’t stop the giant smile from taking over his face. Shane dropped his hand into Ilya’s shirt – awkwardly pulling his arm free from his side – to pull out Ilya’s chain, holding his mother’s crucifix and his engagement ring. He held it out from Ilya’s neck, showing the table. Everyone leaned forwards to look.
“Tabarnak!” said JJ, but he looked delighted.
“Woah, congrats guys,” Troy said.
Hayden smiled widely. Ilya thought he maybe even saw a tear slide down his cheek.
Everyone at the table continued to offer their congratulations. They started asking Shane and Ilya for details of their upcoming nuptials, which they had almost no answers for, other than the general idea that they were going to get married, probably this summer. Cliff started to press them for their engagement story, but by that time Shane had actually fallen asleep on Ilya’s shoulder – so Ilya denied telling the story, insisting Shane would prefer to be awake for that.
After a while the conversation died down, and the bar was starting to empty. Ilya gently nudged Shane awake, telling him it was time to leave. Everyone started heading towards the exit.
“I can Uber with Shane to his place first, and make sure he gets home okay,” Hayden offered.
“No, I’ll go with him,” Ilya replied. “He needs to drink at least three glasses of water and take a shower before bed. He’ll kill me tomorrow if he’s hungover and smells like alcohol.”
“Mmmm,” Shane replied, gripping Ilya’s hand tightly to steady himself.
“You guys are good?” Ilya asked Wyatt and Troy. Wyatt was designated driver, taking them back to Ottawa that night.
“Absolutely,” Wyatt replied.
The group left the bar. Wyatt and Troy headed off to their car. Hayden and JJ supported Shane for a moment, to say their goodbyes, while Cliff pulled Ilya aside.
“Thanks for inviting me out, buddy.” He smiled. “I had an incredible time. Really an eventful night.”
“Shut up, Marly,” Ilya said.
“I’m happy for you, Roz. Really.”
“I know,” Ilya sighed.
Cliff pulled Ilya in for a tight hug.
“Get that boy home safe, okay?” Cliff said, gesturing to Shane – who was limp while receiving an enthusiastic hug from Hayden.
"Always,” Ilya smiled and redirected his attention to the other three men. “Let go of my boyfriend, Pike!” Ilya called, reaching for Shane.
Ilya and Shane’s Uber pulled up to the curb. Ilya helped Shane into the back seat and shuffled in beside him. Shane leaned his head on Ilya’s shoulder, and they drove in silence for about ten minutes, the city lights flashing past them.
“Do you think they figured us out, baby?” Shane said quietly.
Ilya looked at him and laughed. “Yeah, sweetheart, I think they clocked us.”
Shane looked at Ilya, eyes soft and warm. “Ah, okay then.” He nuzzled back into Ilya’s shoulder and fell back asleep.