Chapter Text
PART 2: SPRING
March 22nd
“Lucy,” Genny says over the phone. “You want a baby shower right?”
“Yes.” Lucy says because god forbid she banned Tim from buying anymore baby things and then they don’t have a baby shower. He would go crazy and go buy more baby items they don’t need. “I absolutely do but I don’t have time to plan it so—”
“Don’t worry about that.” Genny says. “I have Angela’s number and we will get it from here.”
“You really don’t—”
“Hey, these are my nieces.” Genny says. “And you don’t need to be stressed about this. You and Tim deserve this.”
“Thanks Genny.” Lucy says and she really got lucky with Genny as a sister in law. She was kind, loving and would take Lucy’s side in an instant but she also loves her brother. And Lucy knows she’s going to be an amazing aunt.
“Hey,” Genny says. “Tim mentioned you picked out one of the babies names but he wouldn’t tell me.”
Lucy rolls her eyes a little. They weren’t telling everyone what they chose until they had the second one picked out. And they weren’t telling Joy until they were born—
“It’s Thea.” Lucy says and she shifts on her feet. “You have to promise not to tell your mom. We are surprising her.”
“With what?” Genny asks sounding confused. “Thea is beautiful.”
“Her middle name,” Lucy replies. “It’s Joy. Thea Joy.” There’s a short silence over the phone before Genny is talking again.
“Oh Lucy it’s perfect.” Genny says. “You know I was going to give my daughter her name if I had a girl.”
Lucy smiles a little. “Yeah?”
“I am so glad you are using it.” Genny says. “It’s—she’s going to be so happy.”
“You can’t tell her.” Lucy warns but her voice is light. She trusts Genny.
“I will get back to you with information about the baby shower. You just hang tight Lucy.” Genny says.
Lucy smiles and says bye before she hangs up and tosses her phone aside.
At least that was one less thing to worry about.
***
“Genny is insisting on a theme.” Angela says to Lucy a little later that day. Lucy blows out a breath and flips through the papers on the table. It was her taxes, that even though she told Tim she was almost done she hadn’t even started. It was lucky she had today off.
“She already talked to you?” Lucy asks. “That was fast.”
“Do you want a theme. I mean she has cute ideas.” Angela says. “But it’s up to you—if you don’t want—”
“I just want something simple.” Lucy says because she’s not sure she could handle much else. “Just simple and cute.”
“You got it.” Angela says. “Don’t worry Lucy. We got it from here.” Lucy thanks her and hangs up.
She really didn’t want to worry about the baby shower. She had enough on her plate.
She’s grateful she has Genny and Angela.
Very grateful.
***
March 23rd
Lucy shuffles through the station following after Celina who is miles ahead. She finally reaches her and pauses a little out of breath.
“Are you okay?” Celina asks looking at her concerned. “You are usually the first one here.” But Lucy waves her off. She’s fine, she is just getting a little bit slower these days. She has two extra weights and it sometimes slows her down but she can do her job.
“I’m fine,” she says. “Load up the drop. I’m driving.” Celina raises her eyebrows at her but doesn’t say a word.
Lucy follows Celina out to the shop where they find Grey. “Sergeant Chen,” he says nodding at Lucy as Celina loads up the shop. “You are still going on patrol?”
“There’s no reason for me not to sir.” Lucy says. She puts her hand on her stomach almost like it’s a habit.
“Do you think you can keep on with Officer Juarez on patrol?” Grey asks. He searches Lucy’s face.
Lucy narrows her eyes at Grey, she had a sneaking suspicion that this wasn’t just friendly talk. “Did Tim send you to talk to me?” Lucy asks even though she hadn’t seen her husband since this morning after he was whisked away by a man in a suit and a frown.
“Sergeant Bradford is in a meeting at the moment.” Grey says. “I just watched you walk across the station.”
“I’m fine.” Lucy says. “I’m pregnant but I’m able to do my job.” Grey studies her for a second.
“You are pregnant with twins, you have an overprotective husband.” Grey says. Lucy blows out a breath.
“What’s your point?” Lucy asks. She glances over at Celina who is clearly trying not to listen.
“Do you need to go on desk duty Sergeant Chen?” Grey asks his voice not unkind.
“God no!” Lucy says quickly. “No sir, I am perfectly capable. Right Officer Juarez?” She turns to look at Celina who straightens up.
“Yes!” She says. “We will be fine sir. It will be an easy day.” Grey looks between them and like he wants to say something else but he doesn’t.
“Okay,” he says. “Just be careful. Both of you.” They both nod and Grey walks away without another word.
***
It is not an easy day and Lucy thinks the universe must have something against her. They pull over a car with no taillights and then the man takes off. Lucy immediately starts to run after him but has to stop halfway down the street. Celina takes over and soon she’s tackling the guy to the ground.
“Nice one Officer Juarez.” Lucy says coming up next to her. She’s a little out of breath and her sides hurt.
“Thank you.” Celina says giving Lucy a look. “I’ll put him in the shop.” Lucy nods and watches her as she opens the door and the man climbs inside.
It was just one guy. It was just one guy.
***
It’s not just one guy or one stop. They pull another car over for speeding and Lucy has to have Celina help get the man out of the car when he pulls a gun on them.
“It’s okay Lucy.” Celina says when they get back in the shop. Celina is at the wheel this time. Lucy closes her eyes feeling her heart pounding in her chest. “You know you are allowed—”
“I don’t want to hear it.” She snaps. “I can do my job. I don’t need sympathy or to be put on desk duty.”
“Okay,” Celina says slowly and Lucy feels her eyes on her. “I know you are capable of doing your job Lucy but—”
“You sound like my husband.” Lucy mutters. “I know you are trying to help but I am just trying to get all the patrol time in before I really can’t.”
“Got it.” Celina says and she looks like she wants to say something else but just shuts her mouth.
This was going to be a long day.
***
The third suspect that she cannot take down and he actually tries to get away is the last straw for Lucy. Celina is giving her a look, but Lucy ignores it and mutters something under her breath before she climbing back into the shop and slamming the door.
She can do her job.
This was just a bad day. A long bad day.
That’s all it was.
***
“Are you okay?” Tim asks when Lucy comes out of the locker room. “Celina—”
“Oh my god.” Lucy snaps turning to look at him. “She told you about all my failures?”
“She’s worried about you.” Tim says gently. “And frankly so am I. You don’t have to push yourself Lucy.”
“I know and I can do my job! I just had an off day.” She says snappily. “Can we just go home?” Tim nods and puts his hand on her back and leads her out of the station.
Tomorrow would be better.
It was her birthday.
It had to be better.
It would be better.
***
March 24th
“Happy birthday.” Tim says pressing a kiss to Lucy’s cheek. Lucy groans and rolls over to face him.
“Is it morning already?” She asks and rubs her eyes before looking at him. “I’m sorry about yesterday. I had a bad day.”
“It happens to the best of us Lucy.” Tim says softly. “Today is a new day and it’s your birthday. He pulls her up and gives her a smile.
“Why are you so excited about my birthday?” She asks. She wasn’t even that excited. She felt like the weight of the world was weighing her down.
“Because I love celebrating you and it’s my favorite day.” Tim says and he gives her another kiss. “You were born.”
Lucy’s mouth twitches into a smile. “Yeah?” She says. “You didn’t know me back then.”
“Well I do now.” Tim says. “And we are going to celebrate you okay? You deserve this.”
“What’s first on the agenda?” She asks. Tim gets out of bed and then goes around to pull her out of bed.
“Breakfast. And then I am riding with you on patrol.” He says. Lucy’s frowns a little but Tim kisses it off.
“Tim.”
“Not for any reason except I want to.” Tim says. “And I get to choose what we get for lunch.”
“One my birthday?” Lucy asks sounding indignant. “But—”
“It’s one of your favorite spots.” Tim says and Lucy lets out a laugh. “So—”
“Sneaky.” She says. “Go on. What else do you have planned?”
“We have a dinner reservation after work.” Tim says. “And—” He leads her to his side of the bed. He opens the bedside table drawer and pulls out a box.
“What’s this?” She asks opening it up. It’s a silver necklace with the letter T on it.
“We can add the second initial later.” Tim says. “I made sure but I thought it would be nice to get it started.”
“It’s perfect.” Lucy mutters running her finger over the T. Thea. One of her precious baby girls.
“Do you like it?” Tim asks and she looks at him, there’s a boyish expression on his face which Lucy loves.
“I love it.” Lucy says. “I love you. Thank you.” Tim pulls her in for a kiss.
“Of course.” He says softly. “Happy birthday Luce.”
“Thank you.” She says and maybe this day wouldn’t be bad after all.
***
Lucy spends a good part of the day smiling and thanking everyone for wishing her happy birthday. It’s the first birthday in a long time where she has actually felt seen. And she’s grateful for everyone who celebrated her.
Especially Tim.
Because he was the one who pulled out all the stops, and got them a reservation at their favorite restaurant. He’s the one who made sure her birthday was everything and more.
“This is amazing.” Lucy says leaning across the table to grab Tim’s hand. “Thank you.”
“You deserve this baby.” Tim says. “I love you so much. And this is your last birthday with just us.”
“True,” Lucy says. “But I think next year will be even better.” Next year she would have two baby girls by her side and Tim. Next year she would probably be exhausted but happy.
“I agree.” Tim says and he squeezes her hand. “I can’t wait until they are here.”
“Me neither.” Lucy says softly and she feels a tiny kick as if they know they are talking about them. “Me neither.”
***
March 25th
“I snapped at a lot of people this week.” Lucy says. “I had a bad day and I just took it out on everyone.”
“I’m sorry Lucy.” Dr. Holloway says. “That’s tough but everyone has those days.” Lucy nods and shifts in her seat.
“Yesterday was my birthday, and Tim did so good with everything. And everyone was so nice.” Lucy says. “I feel bad for snapping.”
“Happy belated birthday.” Dr. Holloway says smiling at her and the she leans forward. “You are allowed to have bad days Lucy.”
“I know.” Lucy says. “I know I’m slowing down and I know eventually I will have to go to desk duty but I’m not ready. Maybe I am physically but mentally.” She shakes her head, she sees Tim at the desk day in and day out. She doesn’t want to get to that level of boredom.
“You have to know when to stop.” Dr. Holloway says. “For you and those babies. No one will think less of you.”
“I know that.” Lucy says trying not to sound frustrated. “I just—I love my job. I love what I do and if I stop—I don’t know what to do with myself.”
“Well you would just be on desk duty right?” Dr. Holloway asks. “You can still work. It will just be different.”
Lucy sighs softly and she knows Dr. Holloway is right. She knows everyone is just looking out for her.
But still—
It hurts knowing she won’t be able to do patrol and she won’t be able to ride with Celina or Tim.
“Maybe you need to find yourself outside of being a cop Lucy.” Dr. Holloway says gently. “You are about to become a mother. Maybe you need to find something else that makes you happy. Find that purpose.”
“Maybe.” Lucy says and she’s trying to think of something but she can’t seem to find anything. She loves her life despite all the stress of the past few months. “I just don’t want to lose myself. I know I’m going to love being a mom. I have no doubt but I don’t want that to—”
“I get it Lucy.” Dr. Holloway says. “I am a mom too. But when you hold those babies for the first time you will just know.”
“Know what?” Lucy asks. Dr. Holloway sighs softly and smiles at her.
“You will know exactly what I’m talking about when you see your daughters for the first time.” She says. “Believe me. Your heart and your life will never be the same again.” Lucy leans back in her seat.
Her life will never be the same again.
Was she ready for that?
Oh god.
***
“How was therapy?” Tim asks as he sits down next to Lucy on the couch. “You were quiet all the way home.”
“I know,” Lucy says and she is still thinking about what Dr. Holloway said. I just had a lot to think about.”
“Yeah?”
“I’m scared Tim. I’m scared that we won’t be ready for these babies. I’m scared that after everything that happened to us—” Lucy starts.
“Hey. Hey.” Tim says and he draws her closer. “We have a lot of time to freak out. I’m nervous too baby but it’s going to be okay.”
“Is it?” Lucy asks softly. Tim nods and presses a kiss to the top of her head.
“Absolutely,” Tim says. “And even if we don’t know what we are doing at least we can do it together right?” Lucy can’t help but smile at that.
“Absolutely,” she says. “Absolutely.”
***
March 26th
“I’m not telling her.” Lucy hears a voice whisper. “You tell her.” Lucy frowns a little as she approaches Tim, Grey and Angela. Tim is still in his clothes he walked into the station in which was weird considering he should be in his uniform by now.
“What’s going on?” Lucy asks looking at all three of them but they all avoid her eyes. “Why aren’t you changed out?” She directs this question at Tim who looks at Grey.
“We thought it would be better if Tim told you—as your husband and not the watch commander. He said you are less likely to—” Grey says but stops when he sees Tim’s look.
“Tells me what?” Lucy asks and the turns to her husband who is looking everywhere but her. “Timothy.”
“Oof.” Angela says. “Full name. Maybe you should be in uniform.” Tim glares at Angela and then turns to Lucy with a soft expression.
“Lucy,” he says. “I know this is the last thing you want to do but we—” he gestures between the three of them.
“No.” Lucy says because she knows where this going. She had a feeling a few days ago and after she left the therapist’s office. “I am not going on desk duty. I can do my job.”
“Luce, you are pregnant with twins. You are allowed to slow down a little. There’s no—”
“I just had a off day the other day.” She says remembering when she couldn’t chase not one but three suspects. “It was just an off day.”
“I’m sorry Sergeant Chen.” Grey says. “Sergeant Bradford had the same argument which is why he’s not making this decision. You are now on desk duty until your maternity leave. That is final.”
“Why are you here?” Lucy asks Angela turning her focus on her. Angela looks at Tim and Grey.
“I wanted you to have support and not feel ganged up on by them.” Angela says. “But I agree with Grey. You need to take care of yourself and not push yourself so much.”
Lucy let’s out a breath but doesn’t say anything. “I got it from here,” Tim says. “Thank you.” She hears Grey and Angela walk off before she’s looking up at Tim.
“You tried?” She asks.
“I tried to get you a few more days on patrol.” Tim confirms. “But Grey wasn’t having it and Angela knows what it’s like.”
“Well thanks for trying,” she mutters and she starts to walk off but Tim grabs her arm.
“It’s not that bad Lucy.” He says.
“Says the guy who said he was bored as Watch Commander.” Lucy says. Tim sighs and leans in to press a kiss to her forehead.
“It’s not that bad Lucy. Besides it’s better than not being at work at all right? Grey could have started your maternity leave early but I put my foot down on that.” Tim says. “We all know you can do your job. You just need a little break. You have to know when to slow down.”
Lucy rolls her eyes a little and then looks at Tim again. “I don’t like this.” She says. “But thank you for trying. I do appreciate it.”
“Of course,” Tim says. “And I got you a desk right outside my office and it’s open any time you need it.”
“Are you this nice to all your patrol sergeants?” Lucy asks a grin finding its on way on her face.
“Just the one carrying my babies.” Tim says and he gives her another kiss and then like he wants to clarify. “Just you.”
“You are lucky I love you.” Lucy says. “Or we would have problems.” Tim just shakes his head and gestures to the desk a few feet away.
“Call me if you need anything.” He says. “This is only for a little bit Luce.” Lucy sighs softly, she wishes it wasn’t this way. She wishes that she could just be on patrol until her maternity leave but—
She goes over to the desk and sits down.
This would have to do for now.