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I Absolutely Do Not, Under No Circumstances, Want to Get Married, But You’re Stubborn Enough to Keep Trying Anyway, and That's Somehow Making Me Consider It by Masked Deuce (MaskedDose)
Fandoms: ダンジョン飯 | Dungeon Meshi | Delicious in Dungeon
27 Nov 2025
Tags
Summary
“It’s good to see you again, Mithrun. It’s been a while, hasn’t it?”
“Kabru,” Mithrun greeted in his typical empty tone. He nodded over his shoulder to one of the elves who raced over and handed him a small brown box. Mithrun flicked it open without fanfare. “Will you accept my proposal for marriage?”
... What?
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Bookmark Notes:
PLEASE THERE IS *NO* BUILD UP WHATSOEVER IT'S BEAUTIFUL
quotes:
Mithrun clunkily walked over, his outfit not only an eyesore, but an obstruction of his normal movements. Perhaps he could be swayed into something more simple and comfortable.
Kabru raised his chin in acknowledgement, then bowed for his greeting as he uttered, “It’s good to see you again, Mithrun. It’s been a while, hasn’t it?”
“Kabru of Melini,” Mithrun greeted in his typical empty tone. He nodded over his shoulder to one of the elves who raced over and handed him a small brown box. Mithrun flicked it open without fanfare. “Will you accept my proposal for marriage?”
THEY LITERALLY *JUST* SAW EACH OTHERRRR FOR THE FIRST TIME IN LIKE A YEAR NO HELLO NO HOW ARE YOU STRAIGHT FOR THE JUGULAR ACTUALLY KABRU WOULD'VE BEEN MORE PREPARED FOR A JUGULAR ATTACK AND LESS CONFUSED AND OVERWHELMED LOL
“I have their support.”
“Did you give them an option?” Kabru doubted, taking another long drink of wine.
“They didn’t oppose.”
Kabru repressed the urge to inspect Mithrun to see if there was truth in that. It didn’t matter. “The ship you came on?”
“From my family. I was accompanied by two witnesses from my family as well as given a sufficient amount as your bride price. I figured you’d rather be given it yourself than have me hand it to Milsiril.”
He couldn’t help himself this time: “How much is it?”
“My entire inheritance.”
Kabru nodded. “You have lost your mind.”
“It’s in exchange for your hand, so it’s a rather smart investment,” Mithrun pointed out as if his reasoning made sense at all. Kabru stifled a laugh behind his hand.
MITHRUN IS LIKE, OBVIOUSLY KABRU >> ALL MY NET WORTH DUH DON'T BE DUMB THAT'S EASY TO OFFER BUT THAT'S ALL I CAN OFFER
AND KABRU THINKS MITHRUN HAS A SKEWED JUDGEMENT
BUT LITTLE DOES HE KNOW THAT IT'S MITHRUN'S SUREST CALCULATION THAT HE CAREFULLY AND CONFIDENTLY AND EASILY DECIDED LIKE THE SKY BEING BLUE
AND KABRU LAUGHS SO GENUINELY AT MITHRUN'S BLUNTNESS AND UNAPOLOGETIC
THEY HURT ME AND HEAL ME AURGHHH
THEY MAKE EACH OTHER SO HAPPY :(((“I’ve thought this through,” Mithrun countered at once, leaning forward, that same defiant glint in his eyes. “This union benefits us both. You’d have my wealth, my loyalty over all, my name and the power that comes with it. You wouldn’t want for anything.”
“I don’t want anything now,” Kabru said flatly. “And really, what could you possibly hope to gain marrying me? I’m not in line for succession. I live in a one bedroom apartment. It’s not much better than the old tavern, I assure you.”
For the first time, Mithrun faltered. The mask of sharp composure slipped, and though his mouth opened, no words came. He closed it, glanced down, then forced his gaze back to Kabru as if to steady himself. His hands clenched from where they rested on the table. “I believe I missed you.”
oh
oh that was beautiful
Mithrun took the tunic, dropping the pillow back onto the bed. “I wasn’t nitpicking. I was fluffing it.”
Kabru flopped onto the edge of the bed, letting out a long, exasperated sigh. “Don’t… don’t do domestic stuff. I don’t want to get married. Not ever. I’m serious about that.”
Mithrun lifted the tunic in his hands and regarded him evenly, dark eyes glinting. “I know,” he said. “Which is why I intend to make you want to. You will see that I am a suitable candidate.”
LMAO MITHRUN IS TRYING TO BUILD A RESUME IN LIFE COMPANION
MITHRUN SQUINTING AT THE PILLOW: I *WILL* OBTAIN MY CERTIFICATION IN MARRIAGE AND WITH A 4.0 GPA“Just a moment, dear.”
Kabru sputtered, a snort of disbelief escaping him. “De—what? Stop that!”
“Sweetheart?”
“No!”
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Bookmark Notes:
adorable. I'm dead serious.
I'M IN LOVE WITH THIS.