Chapter Text
The silence after Bruce’s whistle rang through the dark. His children might have been eaten by the shadows for all they could be detected. He was very proud.
For a long moment all that could be heard was held breath and the quiet creaking of civilians uncertainly shifting about in glass prisons. This was suddenly and unrepentantly interrupted by the solid smack of a body, likely Fishbowl Man, being dropped to the ground and the thuds of blows being deflected. From the depth and speed of the sound, and also the infrared capabilities of Batman’s cowl, Bruce could tell that Red Robin and Spoiler were tag-teaming a surprisingly well-trained Choo.
Bruce would have to update Choo’s file detailing her combat abilities.
Visuals also became available very quickly, though the kind revealed in bits and starts and streaks of light. Choo’s hands had ceased glowing when the lights went out, likely due to her surprise, which was an understandable though amateurish mistake. Now, the glow was back, the purple getting stronger and casting flickering shadows on her opponent’s face.
“Light powers, right.” Red Robin threw up his hands in a gesture that was less frustration with Choo than his own memory of her file.
Bruce was now quite sure his son had no more than a catnap in the last forty-eight hours. Probably two of them. Dick wouldn’t have let Tim out, even for family bonding, if Tim had hit the no sleep at all point. Bruce could say this as someone who had personally run into the monster his eldest became when one of his ducklings or Bruce had hit truly low levels of self-care.
Red Robin shook his head and flat out walked back into the shadows. “I’m out.”
Choo watched somewhat skeptically, her expression lit up like a confused jack-o-lantern. Fishbowl Man, his fishbowl helmet reflecting the flicking purple in a rather upsetting way, gave a slightly groggy chuckle.
“That is correct. Fear my mighty girlfriend!”
Choo ducked suddenly, stepping over Fishbowl Man’s still sprawled position on the floor as she moved to avoid Spoiler’s fist.
Spoiler just laughed. Spoiler had always been the one best able to complete the original Robin’s genuinely joyous yet creeping cackle.
“It’s not so much fear as tapping out,” she said as she in turn ducked Choo’s fist.
The purple light trails left behind were possibly becoming somewhat concerning. The report on Choo had listed her light as having an odd corrosive effect on skin if the light made contact.
Which it didn’t. Because Signal had stepped forward, or possibly had been pushed forward by an unseen force. “Yeah, yeah,” he said over his shoulder as he regained his balance. “I’m on it.”
The light around Choo went out at Signal’s gesture. Choo summoned the glow again, only to have it blink out once more. She tried three more times, dodging blows from Spoiler all the while, before Signal huffed.
“I can do this all day.”
“He’s a meta!” Flash was vibrating in his glass off to the right, his shocked face briefly lit up for a moment before it was extinguished. “Metas aren’t allowed in Gotham.”
“Outsiders aren’t allowed in Gotham,” the Gothamite next to Bruce said loudly enough that Batman didn’t have to.
This allowed him to focus on the slight knock on the back of his glass prison. The infrared of his cowl allowed him to clearly see a small, lithe form wave at him. Bruce paused a moment before waving back. He then sighed when Black Bat held up a large dagger and tapped it again against the glass. The dagger had an odd heat signature that sent the faintest of ripples along the glass.
Bruce activated his comm. “Nightwing. We’re going to talk about your friendship with Constantine and the related new habit of supplying dubious magic items to your siblings.”
He heard Red Hood’s cackle before Nightwing’s response. It sounded like the noise came from right beside Nightwing rather than through Red Hood’s own comm. Which absolutely meant that Nightwing was perched beside his brother in the rafters watching his siblings run amok. Supervising, Bruce was sure Nightwing would say if pressed.
“No idea what you’re talking about, B,” Nightwing chirped. “But I protest the very thought I would give dubious anything to my babies.”
“I was promised a magic blade,” Robin interjected. “You will not obstruct my acquiring a magic blade, Batman.”
Bruce sighed. Black Bat patted him on the arm as she dragged him out of the small opening her not-dubious magic dagger had managed to cut clean through the magic glass.
He tuned back into the general conversation when the Gothamite snorted. Since she didn’t have a line to their communication system and Signal was still helping to keep things dark enough that she couldn’t see much, clearly one of his children had said something ridiculous or the the League had said something stupid.
Naturally, the answer was his children. Spoiler was insisting to the Flash that Signal’s meta status in Gotham was a sign that he was the favourite child. Signal was stammering and insisting it was Black Bat. Neither of them missed a beat in the fight throughout this discussion.
Black Bat handed Bruce something and then started heading around to Wonder Woman’s dragon prison. Bruce considered, sneezed, and dragged himself to the top of his own, previous prison. The little glass cottage thankfully had a flat roof which made it perfect for perching.
“Nine,” yelled Signal. After six, since it was never wise to give your foes an actual countdown when your team could be told to subtract a number ahead of time, he gestured and the entire room lit up in a bright, blinding light. All the Bats had their eyes closed or their lenses blocked so were unhampered.
The light revealed Red Robin and Robin standing in the shattered dust of virtually all of the non-occupied glass items, Red Robin holding the remains of large fish tail that Robin had just cleaved of a glass koi with his katana. Red Hood and Nightwing were up in the rafters, Hood with his gun trained on Choo and Nightwing lounging upside down next to him. Black Bat was offering her hand to Wonder Woman as she stepped out of the glass prison. Signal was looming over Fishbowl Man while Spoiler had Choo in a headlock.
Batman was seated on his prison while eating his soup. His delicious soup, not that Alfred would present anything less.
“What the fuck?” Asked Green Lantern, staring at Bruce.
“Told you it was overkill,” answered the Gothamite.
Bruce almost nodded but was distracted by Nightwing plummeting to the ground and tackling both Robins away from some sort of magic glass bomb that Fishbowl Manmanaged to detonate. Signal had done the same to Spoiler even as Black Bat ducked behind the invulnerable Wonder Woman and Red Hood sent out a shot that crushed the skull of the last glass creature snaking around the room to approach Bruce.
Glass shards and debris rained down on the rest of the prisons, causing civilians to scream and shield themselves unnecessarily. Even Green Lantern had reflexively called a shield up inside his prison.
Bruce lowered his cape and made sure that no glass had got into his soup even as Choo pivoted, clearly not as disoriented as the others, grabbed Fishbowl Man’s hand, and started running away.
Which, finally there was an escape plan. Too bad it wasn’t going to work.
They made it ten steps before the first non-glass explosion. Three more before the glitter. One and a half more before the goop-trap that Spoiler and Red Robin had been trying to fix for the last two weeks and Bruce was still finding remnants of in all his shoes.
Bruce had another sip of his soup.
Black Bat handed her dagger to Signal with a pat on the back before following a bouncing Spoiler to inspect the results of the traps they’s set up while the boys had been introducing themselves to Fishbowl Man. For all Black Bat’s sheer fighting skill and Spoiler’s straightforward nature, the two were very fond of traps.
Spoiler came back dragging Fishbowl Man behind her by the leg, his arms trapped to his side with the goo and his head, still incased in a glass bowl, sliding along the ground. Choo was slung over Black Bat’s shoulder in a fireman’s carry, legs and arms wrapped in cord that ended in a neat little bow.
“So. We going for ice cream after this or what?” Spoiler asked as she dropped Fishbowl Man to the ground. Black Bat was gentler as she dropped Choo, who was sat blinking for a few moments before hanging her head in resignation.
“Dude,” said Flash.
“I’m down,” said Nightwing as he caught the dagger Signal flung at him. Nightwing also gave a wave to the absolutely beaming Superman who was now free and trailing behind Signal. Nightwing then winked at Flash, who stared back with what might be actual awe as Nightwing started using the dagger to cut an opening through the glass.
“Dude,” Green Lantern repeated after his friend, though he was looking to Batman instead of Nightwing or the many others.
Bruce sipped his soup. He was savouring slowly and hadn’t sneezed since he started.
“You’re family is wondrous,” Wonder Woman told him, coming to stand next to the glass prison Bruce was still using as a seat.
He hummed. But it was a smug hum and the League didn’t even need the Gothamite to translate for that to be obvious.
“Bats. A whole family of Bats. How was I supposed to plan for this shit?”
“You didn’t plan for anything,” Flash, now free, pointed out at Fishbowl Man’s complaint. Flash had given Nightwing a giant hug first thing upon freedom and Flash was very lucky Nightwing had been the one to free him. At least three of his other children would have have reacted with violence.
“Tt. We can hardly trust the intellectual abilities of a man wearing a fishbowl on his head.” Robin crossed his arms, ignoring Wonder Woman who practically cooed at him.
“Just be quiet, Numbnuts,” agreed Spoiler, who’d been patrolling with Red Hood recently. “You’re done.”
“Done and jealous you don’t have family willing to jump into a hostage situation just to bring you soup.” Nightwing grinned as he finished up freeing Green Lantern. Green Lantern wasn’t a hugger. Green Lantern poked Nightwing in the side, as if to confirm he was real, pinched himself in the arm, as if to confirm he wasn’t dreaming, and then glared at Batman again, both hands now on his hips.
Bruce ignored him.
“I have something much better!” Fishbowl Man exclaimed, loosing most of the strength from this claim simply because he was still lying on the floor with his arms bound, speaking to the ceiling. “True Love! My beloved jumped in to save me from peril!”
“Tried to save you from peril,” Red Robin muttered.
Wendy Choo, coughed.
“Beloved?” Fishbowl Man craned his head off the floor until he saw at least a little bit of Choo.
“I was maybe already here. They had funnel cake! You know I love funnel cake.”
“I do,” Fishbowl Man admitted.
“And I still came for you! Once, you know, I realized the general ruckus was you.”
“You did,” he agreed, now with a sappy smile.
“Yeah, that was a mistake.” Red Robin crossed his arms as he stared at them.
Batman sniffed. There had been many mistakes today, waking up so far being the largest.
“You can do better,” Nightwing told Choo, tossing the dagger up and down in his head as he studied the numerous other civilians and glass prisons still to go.
Choo sighed. “I know.” She then shrugged as best as she could while bound. “But he grows on you. Like parasitic mold.”
Nightwing started nodding but was interrupted.
“So can you,” Bruce told his oldest son.
“Excuse me?” Nightwing asked, genuinely confused.
“Do better. For a nemesis. Please find a better nemesis than Fishbowl Man.”
There was a long pause and then Red Hood fell out of the rafters. Black Bat caught him because she was very reliable. She did not, however, do anything to even try and stop the shaking laughter of her brother.
“Slade! Blockbuster! Two Face! Fucking Trigon. Whether it’s personal vendettas or Titan enemies I have much better enemies than Fishbowl Man!”
Red Robin stared at Bruce. “Have you been calling him Fishbowl Man in your head this entire time?”
“I mean, it fits,” said Signal, smiling widely.
“Don’t start,” Red Robin told him, pointing with his bo staff for emphasis. “If you start, I’ll start. So don’t start.”
Spoiler came and slung her arm around his shoulders, giggling uncontrollably but still able to get out full words. “Start what? Drafting the battle epic that is Nightwing’s tortured tale of his long-standing feud with Fishbowl Man? Or revelling in the fact that Batman has finally revealed the true extent of his naming capabilities?”
“Tell us, Old Man,” Red Hood finally managed to speak. “Who actually named the Batmobile? Was it really Wing?”
Bruce opened his mouth to reply but was cut off by his oldest son who had finally stopped naming off different villains to wheel back on Bruce and the other heroes. Robin had to step aside since he’d been standing next to Nightwing and assuring him of his perfectly satisfactory work. “I even led that co-ordinated Titan - Justice League effort on Luthor last week!”
“It was very well done,” said Superman, because, once again, Dick as Robin or Nightwing had somehow always been Superman’s favourite.
“Thank you, Superman!” Nightwing said with a genuine smile, because Superman had also always been his favourite.
Bruce scowled and opened his mouth.
“Condiment King,” Nightwing hissed back at him.
Batman closed his mouth. Fine. He had more soup to focus on anyway.
The Gothamite had been holding it together very well, but this was too much. She started outright giggling behind her hands which also seemed to set off Red Robin, who started laughing so hard he had to lean into Spoiler for support. Even Signal was chuckling.
Robin and Black Bat were his only two children. Never mind, Black Bat was refusing to look at him so was just as amused. Robin was glaring from behind Nightwing, defending his brother’s honour.
“This was a terrible idea. You’re all disowned.”
“Liar,” chorused multiple voices, including the traitorous Gothamite next to him. Though she, at least, spoke under her breath.
“So.” Superman was grinning, bright and shinny and completely undeservedly. “What’s the plan?”
“Don’t look at me.” When everyone, even the kids, all turned to stare at him, Bruce crossed his arms. “I delegated, remember?”
All heads turned to Nightwing, who threw up his hands, including the one with the dagger. “Yeah, yeah. I’m on it.”
He marched forward, ignored Choo’s protests, and rapped the hilt of the dagger directly and forcibly onto the fishbowl surrounding Fishbowl Man’s head. The man screamed, but Bruce was pretty sure that more the fact that he hadn’t seen Nightwing coming in the slightest.
The glass around his head split into two neat but uneven parts, falling off with a clunk. There was a much louder series of crashes and clunks as every single glass prison split in in two and collapsed to the ground.
“Fucking what?” Green Lantern looked like he wanted to pull out his own hair.
Nightwing shrugged before tossing the magic dagger back to Black Bat and patting the dazed but still conscious formerly-Fishbowl Man on the cheek. Black Bat caught the dagger, tucked it away somewhere on her suit, and hopped up to sit by Bruce. The glass he’d been sitting on had shifted when cracking in two, but was wedged tightly enough between other pieces that he didn’t have to move much.
“Sympathetic magic. Magic dagger plus focus piece for the glass-magic plus several other factors means break the focus and the rest will break too. Shoddy spell-work not to have contingencies but this was more happenstance than actual effort. So.”
“Just how much time have you been spending with Constantine?” Bruce couldn’t help but ask.
Nightwing rolled his eyes. No one but a Bat would be able to tell beneath the mask but Nightwing knew that Bruce would know. “I’m friends with Raven and Zatanna, too, you know.”
Bruce lowered his soup to stare at his eldest son. Who shrugged again, unconcerned, even as Flash and Green Lantern looked like Nightwing’s nonchalance in the face of a Batglare was their final straw of sanity going up in smoke. Which was ridiculous. Dick had been mostly immune to the Blatglare from day one, and any vestigial effects disappeared the moment Dick had stated occasionally becoming Batman for coverage purposes.
Still, Nightwing did respond. “But yeah, I called Constantine while in the rafters with Hood to confirm. Proving that friendship was the real magic all along.”
Bruce gave in and rolled his eyes under his cowl, confident that Nightwing would see the gesture. Or Nightwing would have, if he wasn’t pointing at the camera and giving that last statement to the wider audience of the country. Probably the world, at this point. The camerawoman and reporter certainly looked gleeful enough.
Bruce went back to his soup.
“I can’t decide if Batman casually drinking possibly poisoned soup on a mission is more surprising than the whole hidden family thing.” Flash watched Batman with a wary gaze.
“Of course the family’s more surprising!” Green Lantern hit Flash on the shoulder. “An entire hero hidden family. I mean, I get hiding them from the public and the villains, but us? We’re supposed to be his team!”
Wonder Woman put her hand on Green Lantern’s shoulder. She, Superman, Signal, Red Robin, and Spoiler had made the rounds to do a quick check onto civilians. Spoiler at her side gave Bruce a quick all clear hand signal. Formerly Fishbowl Man had been chaotic but low on civilian injuries, thankfully.
Wonder Woman proceeded to give a very thoughtful and kind short speech on respecting Batman’s privacy and the care he had for his clearly impressive family. Bruce was actually a little touched. Also a little concerned for the way the Gothamite was clearly holding her breath so she didn’t burst out laughing. Again.
“But they’re terrifying, though,” Flash pointed out. All Bruce’s little Monsters subtly preened at the comment. “Even if, especially if, the yellow one is actually the only meta.” Flash’s tone said he doubted that was the case.
“My name’s Signal. And yup. Only one with powers.” Signal was now officially the only one other than Robin that had introduced himself. All of Bruce’s monsters were also heathens, though Bruce supposed many of his children were independently known to the League and they’d been calling each other’s names out loud for a while now.
Red Robin shrugged, coming to lean on Signal’s shoulder. “I mean, no alien or meta genes for the rest of us. Though I remain unconvinced that Black Bat isn’t some reincarnated fighting goddess or that Demon Brat doesn’t have actual demon in him somewhere.”
Robin protested, loudly, even as Nightwing wrapped an arm around his baby brother. He didn’t even get stabbed for the liberty.
“Don’t worry, Baby Bird, Hood called me demonic last week.”
“You have no bones!” Hood replied, crossing his arms for emphasis.
“I have bones, I promise,” Nightwing said to a concerned-looking Superman. “I’m just a bit of a contortionist.”
Superman looked suitably impressed while Wonder Woman turned to Black Bat. “Fighting goddess?”
Black Bat shook her head. Four of Bruce’s other children all said, “Yes.”
“She’s out best fighter,” Nightwing translated.
Wonder Woman looked back and this time both Black Bat and Batman nodded. Wonder Woman grinned.
“Still. Flash is right. Terrifying! Yet Spooky hid them from his team.” Green Lantern was apparently stuck on the point.
The Gothamite, freed and managing to stay quiet for quite a while now, finally snorted. “Yeah, his second team.” She tilted back her hat to stare down Earth’s heroes. “He coordinates with you what? For emergencies? Weekly meetings? Regular outreach programs? Please. Batman and his Bats coordinate every night to keep the beloved shit-stain that is Gotham functional and far safer than my parents certainly believed it could ever be. Not to mention that said coordination has taken place for many more years than the Justice League has even existed.”
“Don’t even,” Nightwing took over when the pause started leaning towards the implications of child soldiers. He spoke to the team and also the camera, which he, at least, had clearly never forgotten was there.
“We’re all adopted. I’m the oldest and can easily and honestly say we were all out there already. Determined to stay on the streets and help and fight for our own reasons and circumstances. Batman isn’t perfect; no father is, but when he couldn’t stop us, and he did try, he adapted. He made sure we were equipped, trained, loved, and not going to die just because we started young and alone. We did not stay alone with his help. And we made sure he didn’t stay alone either.”
Bruce thought about saying something, he did, but then Hood leaned back slightly and pressed his shoulder into Bruce’s knee and that was Bruce’s baby who’d been dead and now wasn’t and had been coming around the manor more to shout at Bruce about books instead of vigilante topics and Bruce was so proud of his children.
“And they’d eat you.” The Gothamite crossed her arms, backpack shifting slightly, hand-sewn Bat-symbol patch flashing in the light. “Like so hard. Batman was protecting the Justice League from his kids, remember? Not the other way around.”
There was a long pause accompanied by shifting glass and quiet steps as the civilians in the furthest parts of the hall, the ones not direct witness to the Batfamily Drama as his children would put it, trickled out of the building. Even Choo and the dazed but slowly focusing formerly Fishbowl Man on her shoulder were now joining the League in staring at Batman.
“Nightwing’s right,” Batman admitted. “I can’t stop them. I tried.”
Nightwing grinned, probably not so much at being told he was right as at the memories flicking through both their minds of the lengths Bruce had gone to try and keep a baby acrobat in the fucking Manor. There had been locks and bribes and begging and four completely new security systems.
“You should be very grateful that they have the largest and kindest hearts I’ve ever met and better morals than I could every possess because they’re incredible. I couldn’t stop them when they were by themselves and they’re much worse now that they’re all together. I couldn’t win against all of them. Not that I would, but I can’t. You’d last even less time. I’ve run scenarios. And simulations.” Bruce paused, considered, and decided he agreed with the Gothamite. “They would definitely eat you.”
There was a short silence accented by smugness from the Gothamite and crunching glass from everyone else’s shifting feet.
“Well, that’s terrifying,” Flash told a very delighted Wonder Woman and Superman. Green Lantern nodded at his friend’s side, though he froze at Nightwing’s chuckle.
“Well yeah,” said Nightwing. “That was the plan.”
Bruce looked at his eldest and the way he was slowly being flanked by Robin, Red Robin, Spoiler, and Signal. Hood and Black Bat didn’t move from beside Bruce, though they didn’t flinch under Bruce’s stare either.
Bruce held back a sigh wich turned into holding back a sneeze. He recapped his soup, which had the additional benefit of preventing him from trying to pinch the bridge of his nose.
“What do you mean, young warrior?” Wonder Woman asked.
Nightwing tilted his head in a bird-like gesture Bruce had caught him practicing when he was younger. “Our Gothamite has been highly correct so far, but she was wrong about one thing. Batman has been spending a lot of time with the Justice League, lately. Which is a good thing, don’t get me wrong. He’s helping a lot of people, improving the League, and socializing with his peers so gold stars all around. But you lot seem to get into quite a few…let’s call them situations.”
His children were all hypocrites. Nightwing and Red Robin had been trapped in a video game two weeks ago, Hood had been crowing about solving a mission with his flower-arranging skills, Robin was taking care of a basilisk he’d recently rescued, and the girls has a bet going on about who could get the most life-stories out of their villains with casual conversations. Signal in the lead.
Nightwing didn’t acknowledge Bruce’s glare, too busy turning to the League members. And the camera. He was angled directly towards the camera.
With a shrug, Nightwing brushed glass off of Robin’s shoulder, not even bothering to gesture to the ruined glass creatures at their feet or Formerly Fishbowl Man sprawled across the floor. “So we thought we’d add to Dad’s plan a bit. He was very general, after all. A little rescue. A little soup. A little reminder.”
Nightwing paused as he grinned. It was a Gotham Grin, genuine mirth, pointy teeth, and gloom-edged promise.
“There’s always a plan.”
The lights went out again and Bruce felt small but strong hands at his belt. He followed their direction more than willingly.
On the roof, Bruce surveyed his children. “Good work,” he told them and watched as they scoffed or preened according to their nature. Black Bat signed the same sentiment back at him from where she’d wedged herself under his shoulder. The move could look like she wanted affection but was really because she could read the slight unsteadiness to Bruce’s stare.
“Wicked,” said the Gothamite, hopping down from Nightwing’s back and looking at the Batplane parked on the roof.
“Figured we could drop you off. You’ll need to report to the police station for clean up but this saves you being interrogated by the League.”
“They wouldn’t have gotten anything out of me,” the Gothamite grinned.
“Naturally,” said Spoiler, going for a fist bump with the girl. “Narrows strong.”
“Too right.” Red Hood draped his arms over both girls, rubbing his fist into Spoiler’s head as he did so.
“Are you denying the trip in the Batplane?” Nightwing asked.
“Not on your life.” The Gothamite bounced on her toes a bit. “Besides, I still owe Robin photos of Shellwing.”
“This is true,” Robin asserted from her side where he’d been waiting.
“Ask,” Black Bat said from Bruce’s side.
“Pardon?” The Gothamite looked up from the phone she’d been reaching to grab from her pocket.
“Have question. Earned answer.”
The Gothamite blushed, and then glared at the sun because her curiosity wouldn’t have been as noticeable in Gotham gloom. She also squared her shoulders. “Can I get a selfie? I mean, I obviously don’t want to put anyone in danger or make them uncomfortable or anything, but it’s not often we get one of you much less all of you when the streets aren’t shaking apart or being filled with toxic smoke or something.”
“Sure,” said Bruce to everyone’s surprise. “Red Robin can take it.”
Red Robin looked startled and stopped trying to escape Signal’s increasingly less subtle attempts from keeping him away from the Batplane.
“I was going to start the plane?”
“I don’t think so, Baby Bird.” Nightwing came up to flank Red Robin, much to Signal’s obvious relief. “No flying planes on less than forty-eight hours.”
“I’ve slept!”
“More than the catnaps I trapped you into?”
“Yes!”
All eyes traveled to Black Bat, even the Gothamite’s, those hers were a step behind.
Black Bat studied Red Robin for a moment. “Lie.”
“Fuck you all,” muttered Red Robin even as he capitulated and he reached for one of the small drones on his belt. “The Batplane has autopilot.”
“I’ll fly the plane,” Nightwing said with a friendly nudge to his brother. “Part of leadership duties, right. Unless you’re taking back over?”
Bruce looked up at his oldest son during this last bit. Then back over his children, perfectly healthy and smiling with the occasional patches of glass dust across their suits. Then at the canister in his hand.
“No. I will be consuming the rest of my soup. I wouldn’t want it to get cold.”
The soup was in a Bat-thermos. It wouldn’t get cold. His children didn’t call him on it.
They were pretty good kids. When they weren’t threatening half the world, at least.
TheGothamiteKnows posted a photo: [A young woman with bright purple hair under a large hat, a pair of sunglasses, and a Wayne Industries gas mask covering the bottom of her face is standing back to back with a grinning Spoiler. Nightwing has his arm around a scowling Robin and Red Hood. Red Hood is counter-attacking the affection by leaning his weight very obviously on Nightwing who’s grinning while bracing against a smiling Signal’s side. Black Bat is tucked under Batman’s arm, half obscured by his cape and yanking Red Robin further into the picture. Red Robin’s gauntlet is slightly raised and glowing. Batman is holding a silver canister with a yellow bat clearly emblazoned on the the side.
Captioned: That time you crash the family outing of Gotham’s most famous family.
Justice League Chat
Green Lantern: Batsy
Green Lantern: Batsy
Green Lantern: Batsy
Green Lantern: Batsy
Green Lantern: Come on, Spooky, you’ve got explaining to do.
Superman: I will admit to having a few questions.
Flash: A few?!?!?
Oracle: Sorry, Batman’s taking a sick day.
Green Lantern: Who the fuck are you?
Flash: And how did you get in this chat?
Oracle: I’m Batman’s tech support.
Oracle: Which I believe that answers both questions.
Oracle: If you feel you need a Bat, however, Nightwing has volunteered to come help out.
Green Lantern: Uh.
Flash: Um.
Superman: It’s always lovely to see Nightwing!
Superman: Though I hope Batman feels better soon.
Wonder Woman: We do not currently have a mission requiring Batman’s assistance.
Wonder Woman: Please pass on our gratitude and warm wishes of health.
Oracle: Sure.
Oracle: Your call.
Green Lantern: Is it really?
Oracle: Not in the slightest.
NightwingLikesMyPunches posted a photo: [A young teenager with bright pink hair holds up a small tortoise to the window where Robin is perched, one hand on the sill and the other offering the tortoise a piece of lettuce.]
Captioned: Robin meets Shellwing’s brother, Red Shell!
Breaking News! Click here to see a curated list of the hottest and latest Bat-stories to hit the world with the force of a Bat-thermos of Soup
The Daily Planet
Heroes Lurking in the Shadows! Hidden faces and Hidden Families!
Found Family in the Darkest of Places
Additional Help: Teamwork and Team Dynamics as applied in Heroism and Capitalism
Hero News by USA Times
20 Best Batfamily Reactions
Analysis of the ‘Batfamily’ Stregths and Weaknesses
Fishbowl Man Faces his Reflection in Prison
Flash ‘Run’ Meme Voted Best Meme of the Week in Poll
Birdspotters
Spoiler, Nightwing, and Black Bat spotted playing tag with Harley Quinn and Poison Ivy around Queen St.
Robin visits Humane Society to Promote Adoption with Pictures of Pups!
Red Robin and Red Hood are fighting each other by the old street fountain, both claim to be namesake for turtle
From the Gotham Globe
The Birds’ Subtle Threat to the World: Hurt Batman and Face Consequences
The World’s Reaction and Why it Took Them so Long to Realize Batman is Never Alone
From the Gotham Gazette
The Bat-Order Has Been Lifted: Ten Ways to Prove Our Heroes are Better Than Theirs
Bat Burger Releases New Soup! Sewer Water features pasta bat wings, hearts, and roaches with delicious chicken served in a green broth just like Mama used to make!
Wayne Industries Statement: Wayne Industries declares no stake in the public debate that has sprung up from a citizen claim of the recently publicly revealed ‘Batfamily’ being ‘Gotham’s most famous family.’ Bruce Wayne has stated that he has nothing but respect for the vigilantes of Gotham and would be willing to accept tips from Batman on corralling exuberant children.
Overheard at WayneIndustries:
Officially, we have nothing to do with anything - early suggestion for official statement
Challenge accepted - Tim Drake, CEO
Hold onto your Wayne Industries Gas Masks, people - anonymous