Chapter Text
Life is extremely strange. More so because of the endless possibilities. Whether it's finding a $100 bill on the ground, finding the love of your life, or being allowed to retire for good.
Life is full of strange twists and mysteries. But that's the charm and beauty of it. No matter how questionable life can be at times, it can oftentimes be a good thing.
At least that's what V's mother always told her.
However, V didn't take her mother's word or advice to heart. After serving her time as a Helldiver.
She wanted nothing more than to die.
Her regenerative functions made her practically immortal, ruining her innocence. She was cursed and gifted with the ability to regenerate any and all wounds. However this came at the cost of her own sanity.
Everytime she was near death, she was forcefully resurrected.
Leaving behind many scars.
Both physical and phantom.
Some may even go as far as to think it was a gift.
It's not when you can always feel the pain and relive the memories vividly.
[System Booting Up…Standby….]
[Loading…]
[Rise and shine, sleeping beauty.
[{SERIAL DESIGNATION - V}]
[Current time: 06:45 AM.]
[Current Weather: 20°C, No Winds, Sunrise Imminent at 07:30 AM.]
[Current Health Status: No Injuries detected or Sustained. {Perfect Condition.}]
[UPDATE - Minor arthritis detected in servos, advised to use {Ibuprofen} to ease pain temporarily.]
[Mental Health Status: {Depression}, {PTSD}, {Attachment Issues} Detected. Advised to seek {JCJENSON THERAPIST}]
[Overall Status: Good. No major setbacks, aside from Mental Health.]
The information was plastered across V's visor, almost blurred as she struggled to wake herself up. Her tired eyes, still half-closed, squinted at the display. She stared for a moment before she slapped her face lightly, trying to rouse herself. The effort felt tiring, like pulling herself from quicksand.
“Mm…don't tell me..it's morning already..?” She muttered, her voice hoarse from sleep and last night's drinking. She laid on top of the mattress as the blanket kept her warm. She remained silent as she stared up at the ceiling of the small hotel room. Every part of her body ached. The mattress, worn and lumpy– had done her no favors.
With a groan, V sat up, slowly and carefully as she whined a bit in pain. After sitting up and ensuring she didn't snap a bone or two, she swung her peg-like legs over the edge of the bed. Her feet made a dull thud as they hit the floor. The cool tiles sent a shiver up her spine, briefly waking her up some more. She glanced around the dim room, the early light filtering through the blinds in narrow slits, painting stripes on the walls and floor.
“Ughhh…” V sighed, pressing her palm against her face. Her body felt like shit. Not only was she hung over– every muscle in her body was protesting against every movement. She spent a good few minutes cursing at herself for bothering to drink the night before. If anything she was a recovering alcoholic and the idea of free booze from the hotel's bar was too tempting.
Thank robo-jesus she was alone. If her folks were here then they would have undoubtedly fussed up a storm.
That train of thought was cut short as she felt a sting of pain flow through her head. “Fuck…I think I drunk too much…” Rubbing her forehead, she couldn't help but let out a low groan as she felt the wave of nausea slowly pass through. Followed by that strong sensation of pain. Then she was hit with a small text displayed in her HUD.
[Reminder - Bus departure for {COPPER-9 COUNTY} is at 7:50 AM]
After the sudden message and reminder– V groaned some more as she cursed at herself. The prospect of facing the day seemed daunting! Especially having to go to some small town and socialize… She longed to crawl back under the covers. To escape this living hell and fall into blissful slumber.
But the day progressed on, and she had places to be, a job to do. Ignoring the complaints of her body, she pushed herself up. The covers fell away, revealing her disheveled figure. She caught a glimpse of herself in the mirror across the room. Her hourglass shape and well-defined curves were marred by the numerous scars from her time in combat. Her yellow eyes, heavy with dark circles, stared back at her.
Slowly, she dragged her fingers down her torso, tracing the lines of her scars. They were an eyesore, a constant reminder of her past. Each one had a story, a memory she wished she could forget. But they were a part of her now, inseparable from her identity.
“Seems like I still have them.” She murmured. Her eyes were fixated on the large scar she had on her belly, a long slit like one.
The scars no longer caused her pain, but the sight of them was rather distasteful. She had considered having them removed, but the thought of more surgery was unbearable. Let alone the possibility of having to abandon this body… She had been through enough already.
With a sigh, she tore her gaze from the mirror and turned toward the bathroom. Her peg-like feet made no sound on the cold tiles as she shuffled across the room. The bathroom was small, the tiles cracked and yellowed with age. She stood before the mirror, looking at her reflection.
Her eyes, weary and sunken, stared back at her. The dark circles beneath them were prominent, evidence of too many sleepless nights and bad drinking habits.
Her hair was a tangled mess, falling in wild strands around her face. She raised her hand to brush it back, revealing more scars along her jawline. She wasn't exactly too confident about them. Thankfully she was growing her hair out. Those scars would be less noticeable, besides, not like anyone would find them attractive or admire them.
As V was lost in her thoughts, she subconsciously continued her routine. Eventually her gaze shifted downward to the stump of her right arm. The sight of it still made her flinch. The burn marks that surrounded the nub were a bitter contrast to her pale skin. A bitter reminder of her past.
She had lost her arm in a brutal fight. One that she's never forgotten. Fighting against a feral Primordial Drone…that was something that scarred her, both physically and mentally. The memory of that fight was vivid, the pain and fear still fresh in her mind.
“I guess it makes for a cool story...at least I think so.” She reassured herself, bitterly. The loss of her arm hadn't been easy, especially considering her model was extremely rare and delicate. But she had adapted. She always did. It's not like she couldn't just regenerate that limb. She couldn't. Not unless she wanted to risk prolonging her own life expancity.
Thankfully she had a prosthetic back home, a durable titanium arm with a built-in cannon. But it was heavy and bothersome! A bit impractical– and she had opted not to bring it on this trip. It was a part of her that she didn't really like.
A part of her life that she disapproved of.
She had intended to leave it all behind, to disappear.
She wanted to start fresh.
The thought of home brought a pang of longing. She missed the familiarity, the comfort of her own space. But she knew that she needed to move on. Even if it meant she'd never give a proper goodbye to her parents…
Running away won't solve anything.
Flying away wouldn't either.
Maybe…death could?
Maybe it could solve this feeling of… hatred?
Disgust?
Phantom pain?
Everything.
Maybe it could solve everything.
V stared at her chest through the mirror, her core glowing a light shade of yellow. Carefully she touched it. Blushing lightly as it felt oddly.. good. She knew that stimulation on cores from others could be a form of affection.. but she had no one to do that.
Let alone how hers was ugly.
Marred in the scars of her time in war.
Everything about her body was ugly.
She wasn't pretty.
She wasn't gorgeous.
She was ruined.
Disgusting.
She was nothing.
“Im.. I'm still.. Still loveable..” V mumbled to herself, gripping onto the sink as she closed her eyes. Seeming to try to prevent herself from letting her mind wander someplace much darker.
“I..I'm okay..”
With a deep breath, she turned on the tap and splashed cold water on her face. The shock of it jolted her awake, clearing the fog from her mind and preventing her from overthinking anymore. After a brief moment of splashing some water on her face. She grabbed a towel and dried off.
As she looked up, she couldn’t help but stop and take a moment to admire herself.
She looked at herself and.. she felt somewhat confident . Her hair was a bit overgrown, slightly damaged, but still pretty. The bags under her eyes weren't too noticeable.. if you were blind as she was– Aside from that.. she was quite beautiful.
Letting out a small chuckle, she reached for her toothbrush, the mundane task was pleasant in giving her something else to focus on. As she brushed her teeth, her mind wandered about.
The system's update had mentioned her mental health, a constant struggle of hers. Depression and PTSD were the main issues that she always tended to endure on a daily basis. Half the time she'd drown these moments out by downing an entire bottle of whiskey.
Not a healthy coping mechanism–
Eventually she spat out the toothpaste and rinsed her mouth, staring at her reflection once more. She leaned in closely, ensuring she looked somewhat presentable and approachable. Of course that was only so she didn't scare any children again–
Children… Thinking about them made her frown. It's not that she disliked them entirely! It's just.. she has had a hard time interacting with them–
Especially after she's collected many scars and built up such a reputation– Many parents know of her unit's past and what they did as Helldivers. They weren't seen as heroes and she was treated far from one.
After a few minutes.
V finished up with her routine. She felt quite better and more happy after washing up. As she left the bathroom, she moved to the small wardrobe in the corner of the room. There was her suitcase, stuffed and neatly packed with her clothing and a few personal belongings.
Opening the case, she looked inside to find her organized clothes. Neatly folded and placed in color code. As she trailed her fingers along the various outfits, she pulled out a pair of loose pants and a baggy sweatshirt. She settled on dressing comfortably.
Not only was it comfortable– it also hid the many scars she had. A win win in her books. She dressed quickly, her movements stiff and a bit slow due to her joints being quite stiff and fragile. Something she seriously hated–
As she finished getting dressed, her stomach growled, reminding her she hadn't eaten since yesterday.
She considered ordering room service but decided against it. She wasn't in the mood for small talk or forced pleasantries. Instead, she grabbed a protein bar from her bag and unwrapped it. The taste was bland, but it filled the urge she had for food. Besides, she could always pick up some oil from a vending machine on her way out.
As she chewed, she sat on the edge of the bed, staring at the floor. Memories of her last deployment began to fill her mind. The sounds of gunfire, the screams of her comrades crying for their loved ones, the smell of blood and smoke. She shook her head, trying to push the thoughts away.
“Nope…no…absolutely not…!”
She needed to focus on the present. Leave those horrible memories behind. She had a chance to start fresh and she would be damned if her friend's opportunity for a job went to waste. It was a chance to start over. It was a lifeline, and she couldn't afford to let it slip away.
Besides, she owed Uzi one for talking her into even bothering to go down to Copper-9. If anything she would've gone through with continuing to fight or serve under PMCs. But.. working at a cafe.. that didn't sound too bad.
As she finished her thought and the protein bar. She stood up and grabbed her bag, slinging it on her back. Then she grabbed the heavy coat her dad gifted her from his aviator days, a brown leather jacket with some fur. It was a bomber jacket to be more exact.
It was cozy and oddly comforting. As she adjusted the cuffs, making sure they weren't too loose. After she made sure she had everything, she took one last look around the room. Making sure she hadn't forgotten anything. After a quick examination and a quick nod.
She stepped out into the hallway.
The door closed behind her with a soft click, sealing away the chance to crawl back into bed and rot in it. There was no going back now.
The hotel corridor was quiet, the carpet muffling her footsteps. She made her way to the elevator, her mind focused on the day ahead. As the elevator doors slid open, she stepped inside and pressed the button for the lobby.
The ride down was silent, giving her a moment to collect her thoughts. She was texting Uzi about her departure to the bus stop, sure Uzi wouldn't have responded right away– considering it was too early for her to be up. But it was nice to text her, even if she talked about her crush on her coworker.
Love was an iffy topic for V. She knew she wouldn't ever have someone to call her own. (NOT YEEEEET, TEEHEEE!!) Or someone to love her for who she is. A girl could only dream.
Then the doors opened. She was greeted by the bustling activity of the hotel lobby. Guests checked in and out, staff moved with purpose as they’d greet guests or do their assigned tasks. The hum of conversation filled the air, something that eased V's mind as she'd inhale the scent of roasted coffee beans.
She smiled a bit as she made her way through the crowd, her eyes never met another's as she placed her keycard on the front desk. The hotel employee noticed this and bid her farewell.
V's arrival at the bus stop was a blur. She didn't really pay attention to much. Only paying her fare and taking a seat. Avoiding eye contact with everyone and small talk. Sure a few guys tried to hit on her but she simply ignored them. Focusing on scrolling through the Wikipedia page on her phone.
“Copper-9 County, Alaska.”
“Several reports from game wardens and foreign Class IV hunters have claimed to encounter Primordial Drone Tribes in the forest.”
V’s interest was piqued. A part of her even felt a glimmer of hope as she grinned a bit. If her memory serves her right.. Primordial Drones were the only thing that could seriously hurt her. Leading to certain death. That was definitely a treat.
“August 25th, 2028. 6 year old Samantha was reported missing around the time her family was visiting the county for its snowy scenery.”
This caught V's attention as she scrolled some more, seeming to squint her eyes for better focus.
“Police and Gamewardens couldn't find the young child. Local towns folk insisted on allowing the ‘The Sacred Beasts’ to aid in the search. Many advised to simply leave a piece of clothing or belonging with the child's scent.”
‘Sacred Beasts? So there's more than one…’ V concluded as she scrolled a bit, seeming to enjoy the small report.
“After Samantha's parents agreed to the town folk's plan, they reported hearing howls in the forest upon placing one of Samantha's prized plushies. It was concluded from declassified police reports that the young girl was reunited with her parents in under 5 hours. The young girl was found to be safe and unharmed, she only complained about her play date with ‘N’ being interrupted.”
“Further reports from locals have been filed over the years. Many claim the beast's mean no harm, although many claim that only one is friendly.”
‘A friendly Primordial Drone? That's rich.’ V was focused on the story, not seeming to notice the bus pulling to a halt as the engine hissed and began to die down to a low constant rumble.
“Copper-9 County, last stop.” The bus driver announced to the only remaining passenger, V.
She could barely register the words in her mind. It wasn’t until the bus doors creaked open and the frosty air rushed in that V looked up, snapping back to reality.
She stuffed her phone into her coat pocket and disembarked, her boots crunching on the icy ground. The air was freezing, her breath was visible in the frigid air. She glanced around, taking in her surroundings.
The small county was enveloped in a perpetual white blanket, with thick forests bordering the town, their tall pines swaying gently in the cold wind. Wildlife was seen, a few birds stopped and examined her before flying away.
‘Maybe this wouldn't be so bad..’ V told herself as she smiled a bit.
She began to walk around. Her curiosity was pulling her towards the desolate part of town. The streets were relatively empty, save for a few locals who eyed her with a mix of curiosity and wariness. With the way V was a retired Helldiver– It wasn't too surprising a few locals gave her a stink eye.
They possibly mistook her for another hunter who was trying to make a name for themselves. Many folks did that and never returned, well, not the same at least.
She wandered aimlessly, her thoughts still on the intriguing reports she had read. Primordial Drones, Sacred Beasts, missing children– it all seemed like something out of a dark fairy tale.
Turning a corner, she found herself in a more secluded area, where the snow seemed untouched. The silence was almost eerie, the only sound being the distant howl of the wind. She paused for a moment, scanning the treeline, when suddenly she collided with something– or rather, someone.
As she walked, her thoughts were interrupted when she bumped into someone. She looked down to see a small Worker Drone with a very striking appearance. She wore designer-like attire that was clearly very pricey, and her blonde hair with pink highlights at the ends complemented her pink eyes perfectly. Overall, she looked waaay out of place being here.
“Watch it!” The girl snapped, brushing snow off her coat. “Are you blind or just stupid?” Her voice was laced with sass and annoyance as she glared up at the Disassembler.
V seemed a bit surprised, staring at her before she acknowledged her. “Sorry.” She mumbled, taking a step back as she gave the stranger some space.
The girl huffed, crossing her arms as she looked at her nails, seeming to study V as she squinted her eyes. “What are you doing here anyway? You don’t look like a local... ”
“I'm not from around here.” She replied bluntly, not offering much more. The silence between them was quite thick. V wasn't much for conversations, let alone possibly upsetting a rich bratty snob–
“Lizzy.” The girl replied, her eyes finally meeting V's yellow ones as she seemed to have concluded her examination on the stranger.
V met Lizzy's gaze, her expression still and calm. “V.” She replied coolly.
Lizzy's eyes widened slightly. “Just V?”
“Just V.” she confirmed, keeping her tone even.
Lizzy smirked, a hint of mischief in her eyes. “Well… ‘V’. You definitely don't look like you're here for skiing or the scenery.”
V shrugged. “I'm here for a fresh start.”
“A fresh start?” Lizzy questioned her, raising an eyebrow. “In this dump? You must be desperate or crazy. Or both. ”
V's face remained impassive. “Maybe a bit of both.” She didn't seem bothered by Lizzy's questions or remarks, if anything it brought a sense of comfort. Almost like her old squadmates' humor.
Lizzy let out a dry laugh. “Hah! At least you're honest.” She eyed V's attire, the heavy bomber jacket, the backpack… and the way she carried herself. It was quite… strange.
“Ya know, you look like you've seen some things.”
“You could say that.” V replied, her tone giving nothing away.
“Why here of all places?” Lizzy asked, genuinely curious now. She tilted her head as she grinned a bit.
“A friend suggested it.” V said, keeping her response brief.
Lizzy snorted. "Some friend. This place is crawling with all sorts of creeps looking for hookups! You sure you’re up for it?"
V’s eyes lazed over to the treelines. “I've faced worse.”
Lizzy's expression shifted slightly, a hint of respect crossing her features. “Alright then. I can see you're a hard one.”
V didn’t respond, she was busy staring into the forest.
It's almost as if.. someone was watching her–
“Come on! Let's get you out of this cold. I’ll show you around.”She began walking again and V looked at her. Then back to the forest.
For a second she could've sworn she saw a pair of eyes staring back at her.
Soon she brushed that feeling and thought aside as she fell into step beside her. As they moved through the town, Lizzy continued her commentary, pointing out various places of interest and giving her two cents on each one.
As V followed Lizzy through the small town, her mind wandered, momentarily distracted by the odd sensation of being watched.
She shook it off. Attributing it to the unfamiliar surroundings and her own unease in this new place. Lizzy’s animated chatter about local gossip and the best places to eat pulled her attention back to the present.
Meanwhile, hidden in the branches of the trees, a pair of golden eyes were staring at V. There was no hostility behind them. Only curiosity as the figure slowly stood up. His attire was quite worn out, the cuffs on his coat dirty, the armband he wore was kept in pristine condition.
The armband read, ‘SD-N’.
These pair of eyes belonged to N. One of the many Primordial Drones who ran away and evaded captors. He was quite well known around the county, just never seen– something he did his best at.
As N observed V’s every move with a mix of fascination and caution. His large form remained still, blending seamlessly into the winter landscape. Aside from the military trench coat he wore– his pants and boots were the perfect blend of dust and snow, acting as a makeshift ghillie suit.
The more he watched her walk away. The more his instincts urged him to approach her. To learn more about the intriguing stranger who had ventured into their territory. To bring her back to his den and mate with her. Possibly convince her to bear his cubs–
“No…no naughty thoughts..” N scolded himself as he found himself blushing a bit upon thinking such things. He barely caught a glimpse of her but… she was just so pretty to him.
“Pretty lady..” N whispered to himself again, a phrase that seemed to roll off his tongue with ease. He didn't know why she was so… pretty? If anything she was just.. well, gorgeous…? Is that what J meant when she talked about the stars? It was prettier than anything?
Regardless, she was pretty to him. His excitement was almost evident as he was about to take off and snatch her– Until he realized his current position.
He knew he couldn’t risk revealing himself, not without potential dire consequences.
Drones like him were designed for combat, not social interactions, and any deviation from their protocols could lead to… death. At least that's what J always told him. She was always right, besides, she kept him in line!
But V was different. There was something about her that stirred a longing within him, a desire to understand more than just her physical appearance.
As Lizzy led V further into the deeper part of the town, N made a silent decision. He would keep watching, learning, and perhaps find a way to approach her without breaking the rules.
His golden eyes remained fixed on V’s retreating figure until she disappeared from view, leaving him alone with his thoughts and a growing curiosity that refused to be
“She will be mine.”