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Once the door closes behind her parents, it’s go time. They head upstairs and eagerly get started. He takes off his shirt and tosses it to the floor. She does the same with her own. Her large breasts flop out gracelessly as she removes her bra, too, and they swing around with the pull of gravity as she moves to put her glasses on the bedside table.
Hunter’s always found people his age to be boring during sex, but Willow has always been the exception in his fantasies. He’s finding that she’s the exception in reality, too. He’s entranced just watching her. She blushes at the attention, but makes the decision to scoot over and sit in his lap. She gives him a peck on the cheek, then rests her head against his collarbone. She takes his hand in hers and plays with it while she waits for him to say he’s ready to continue.
He’s overcome with so much affection for the girl in his lap that he nearly cries. He wraps his arms around her and pulls her close enough to give her a kiss on the forehead in return.
She giggles.
Some of the tension in his body melts.
He takes a deep breath. “Okay. Next?”
She grins and hops out of his lap. They take turns shrugging their pants and underwear off until they’re both sitting across from each other, naked. He resists the urge to cover his dick with his hands. He thinks this is the first time he’s ever felt bashful about someone seeing his body.
“You’re so pretty,” she breathes out, once she takes him in.
He blushes. “You’re prettier.”
“Mmm, I don’t know. I think you are. But I think we can call a truce for now.”
She bites her lip and looks him up and down.
“Can I touch you?” She asks.
He swallows hard and bobs his head.
She scoots closer. She trails her hands up and down his arms, thighs, and back. She puppets his arms to touch her chest. He massages her tits and grins at the way it makes her moan.
This gentle exploration is nowhere in the realm of what he knows sex to be, but he finds that he doesn’t mind. Just being close to her and taking their time figuring out what they both like is appealing to him. He feels like he’s twenty, not eight, and he adores every second of it.
He leans in for a deep kiss. It’s slow and clumsy, considering Willow’s never done anything like this before, but he finds it endearing. If he closes his eyes and pretends hard enough, this experience can be his first time, too.
He thinks of manipulative words, slaps to the face, and not being ready.
The memory immediately brings tears to his eyes. He pulls away and tells her to stop for a second.
“What’s wrong?” she asks. Her eyes are big with worry.
“Nothing, nothing. I just…” His voice cracks, “I’m really happy to be doing this with you.”
Her face falls a bit. She offers him a hug. He accepts it and cries a little against the side of her neck.
“Sorry. I’m killing the mood,” he murmurs.
She hugs him closer.
“You’re not. I’m glad you’re letting yourself feel this stuff. I know it’s hard. I’m glad you’re doing this with me, too. I couldn’t think of a safer person to try this with.”
She gives him a lopsided grin and rests her forehead against his. He blinks away the next round of sentimental tears that threaten to fall and cradles the reassurance to his chest.
“Yeah. I know. And…I think I’m good now. Thanks.”
“Of course! Now, uh, what do we do next?” She asks.
Hunter pulls away and bluntly lays out all their options. He tells her that she can pick what she wants to try. She says that she wants to start off small, so she chooses the most tame act he suggests.
Hunter’s terrified he’s going to mess this up. And sure enough, when he puts his thumb over her mound and starts swirling, she taps out. Immediately, he thinks he’s done something wrong. He makes himself breathe through the panic and tries not to jump to conclusions. His halted spiral rewards him—Willow admits that she’s just overwhelmed and nervous.
A flip switches in him. He’s no longer in shy, wannabe virgin mode. Willow’s scared, and he’ll be damned if Willow is scared on his watch. He knows exactly what he hated about his own first time, and knows exactly what he wishes would have happened to him, if he’d had the choice.
He makes sure to explain everything he plans to do before he does it. He moves with an assured, yet careful pace. He checks in with her often, making sure that everything he’s doing with her feels good.
He loves the tangible feedback from her words, and especially from her body. She produces more and more slick as he continues, which he takes as permission to ask if she wants him to start going down on her. She asks what all that entails, so he explains it. Even though her face lights up on fire, she squeaks a shy-but-eager “Yes.”
He loves the way Willow sounds and tastes. Her face twists up in pleasure as he works her closer and closer to an orgasm. Every time he gives a particularly teasing lick up her slit or circles her clit in just the right way, she clutches the bed sheets and curses. He grins against her labia and pats himself on the back for doing this well so far.
She’s so hot. He’s about to cum just watching her squirm in pleasure. Angling for an even more intense reaction, he starts sucking on her clit. He gets what he wants—she instantly cries out at the new sensation. He increases the suction once he feels she’s acclimated to it, but the next level of intensity causes her hands to unconsciously fly down to grip his hair for support.
The familiar sensation of fingernails digging into his scalp makes him start to float away. If he wasn’t triggered enough before, he definitely is now. She notices right away when he stops moving and removes her hands as soon as she realizes what she’s doing.
“Sorry! Sorry. Fuck, I swear, I didn’t mean to do that. Are you okay?”
He’s physically okay, but he doesn’t exactly feel like he’s with Willow anymore. His body is cycling through the feelings of fear-love-pain from the many times he’d sucked the Emperor’s dick in the discomfort of Hunter’s own hot, too-small room. He wants the man’s long, spindly hands out of his hair and the man’s rotting body ten feet under the dirt of Hunter's own mindscape.
He sits up and breathes through the rising in his stomach. He pushes a few memories that want to pop up to the wayside and tries to focus on the things he can see and feel now. One thing he can see in the present is that Willow is sitting up too now, visibly concerned and guilty. She offers him her hand, so he takes it. Her hand is chubby and small, which is another good reminder of where he is.
“I’m okay. Just give me a second,” he says.
He gives her hand a reassuring squeeze. They sit for a moment until the flashbacks fade away.
“Okay. I’m okay,” he says, after a minute of mentally running through grounding exercises.
Willow gives him a hug and frowns. “I’m really sorry, again.”
“It’s okay!” He assures, “It was an accident Will. I’m okay. Promise. Now, do you wanna go back to what we were doing, or try something else, or…?”
“Honestly, I’m kind of overstimulated right now. If it’s cool with you, do you wanna try some more tomorrow, instead?”
His heart drops.
“You’re not mad, right?” He asks, “I’m sorry. I wanted your first time to be good. I’m really, really sorry, I—”
Willow snaps out of the shy headspace that fooling around for the first time had put her in and blows a raspberry on his cheek.
He frantically wipes it away and rubs the spit on her arm.
“Ew, gross! I’m being serious, Willow.” He glares at her.
She just smiles and ushers him into a hug. Hunter melts. He doesn’t think he’ll ever get tired of hugging Willow.
“There’s not a single part of me that’s mad. Hunter, I think that’s the most fun I’ve had in my entire life. Holy Titan. You’re so good at that.”
“Years of practice. Well, not really with vaginas. But I will say, I picked that up extremely quickly during my…what did Luz call it again? My ho phase?” He says, smirking.
She snorts. “Can you stop joking about dark shit for five seconds and just let me compliment you?”
“Of course, of course, please continue,” he rolls his hand dramatically.
“You’re so goofy.”
She grabs his sassy hand and leads it to rest on her thigh. She focuses on fidgeting with it while she thinks. She watches her hands curl the index finger of his left hand up and down before she speaks again.
“I really do mean it when I say I had fun. I don’t think there’s a person in the world I’d trust more to have my first time with than you.”
“Thanks, Captain…I just feel feel bad that you didn’t even get to finish.”
She shrugs and puts his hand down to make eye contact with him again.
“You didn’t either. Not that I know that much about sex, but I feel like it’s not just all about getting each other off. I think the stuff we did today to test the boiling seas is just as important, you know? We can always pick this back up later when we’re ready again.”
He wants to ravage her face and neck in feather-light kisses to show her how much her words mean to him. However, she says she’s overstimulated, so he’s going to keep his mouth to himself. He also considers the way he’s not even hard anymore, not after the flashbacks, and begrudgingly agrees that he doesn’t really want things to lead to full-blown intercourse today, either.
It feels taboo, getting to just…stop in the middle of sex when someone doesn’t want it anymore. Yet even though neither of them got off today, he thinks it’s still the best sexual experience he’s had to date.
Hunter suggests that they cuddle and watch TV. Willow loves the idea.
Hunter finds that he really likes being the big spoon, too.