Chapter Text
The magician threw a bolt in Red Robin's direction, laughing as it hit him in the chest. Jason snarled and started shooting, but the magician had already disappeared in a cloud of smoke.
Fucking Gotham.
The rundown apartment they had tracked the magician to was a wreck, both from the fight and the general decay.
Jason was near the doorway, Bruce was in the middle of the room and Tim–
Tim…wasn’t there anymore.
The pile that was Red Robin's suit started moving. Bruce took out a batarang and Jason redirected his gun towards the source of movement.
Then a weirdly familiar face popped out the top of the suit.
It wasn’t Tim.
Or, at least, not the one they were used to.
Tim was tiny. Like, trip over him if you're not paying attention tiny. His cheeks were soft and round, his hair was shiny and soft, going in all different directions and he was wearing his under armour t-shirt like a very baggy dress.
Jason's lips twitched. The kid was pretty adorable in comparison to the unhinged lunatic he'd grow up to be.
He clicked the safety back on and put his gun away.
Tim looked between Batman and Red Hood, a mixture of confused and fearful. He shuffled back, eyeing them warily and barely managing to avoid tripping over the Red Robin suit laying haphazardly across the floor.
"Are you in your right mind?" Bruce's modulator made him sound like he was growling.
Tim moved further back, his eyes narrowing. Ah, so even baby Tim was a suspicious little gremlin, good to know. Jason huffed out a silent laugh.
"Can we pick you up?" He asked, trying to save the situation before Bruce made it unsalvageable.
"No." Tim scowled.
Bruce moved forward to do so anyway, because of course he did. In response, Tim toddled away at a surprising speed for a two year old.
"No!" He yelled, as Bruce dove towards him. Tim swerved to the side, just barely managing to avoid Bruce's grasp.
There was something hilarious about watching Batman lunge at a toddler as if the kid was a rogue on the loose.
"Go away!" Tim ducked under a small desk and sequestered himself right at the back. Neither of them would be able to reach him without lifting it, which would probably freak the kid out more than he already was.
Bruce glared at the desk as if it was the cause of all his problems.
"Did a two year old just outrun you?" Jason asked, wanting to make sure he wasn't hallucinating. He took his helmet off and held it under his arm.
Bruce clenched his jaw. "I didn't want to hurt him." He growled.
"Liar!" Tim piped up from under the desk.
Jason was starting to like this version of his successor.
He and older Tim were cool, the kid was pretty funny and surprisingly laid back about Jason's methods. Which was why they ended up sharing ice-cream at the Tower instead of fighting to the death, as was the original plan.
But toddler Tim was a little ball of spite and Jason loved it.
"Tim." Bruce growled. God, the old man really needed to get a new setting on his modulator.
"No!" Was Tim's succinct reply.
Bruce went to say something else that would probably make the kid despise him more, so Jason decided to intervene.
"Back off, old man." He grumbled as he walked over and crouched down beside the desk. “You’re probably scaring him.”
“Bad man.” Tim confirmed.
“See?” Jason didn’t bother to hide the smugness in his tone. “Hey, kiddo.”
A long pause. “Hi.”
“I’m Jason.” He smiled at Tim, who was scrunched up against the wall at the back of the desk.
He stared at Jason for a moment. "I–"
“Names.” Bruce chided.
“I’m giving it!” Tim’s voice was indignant. Jason couldn’t help but laugh, imagining Bruce's baffled look. “I’m Tim.”
“Well, Tim. I have a chocolate bar for you.” Jason could see Tim’s baby blue eyes widen from under the desk. Bribery always worked on kids, according to Roy. “But you have to come out to get it.” Jason waved the bar at the opening of the desk.
Tim made a cute grumpy sound and shuffled forward, almost within grabbing reach before stopping. “Is it really chocolate?” He asked suspiciously, carefully pronouncing chocolate.
Leave it to Tim to be paranoid even as a goddamn toddler.
Jason held it out closer to Tim so the kid could get a proper look at it. “It is. See–”
The bar was snatched out his hands and Tim threw himself back to where he was before Jason could do anything.
“Thank you.” Tim said, the sound of wrapping being ripped apart accompanying him.
Jason gaped. That little shit.
Bruce hadn’t made a sound, but he could sense the man’s silent amusement at seeing Jason get outsmarted by a two year old.
“That wasn’t our deal, kiddo.” He tried to keep his voice light.
“Oops.” Tim said through a mouthful of chocolate.
“Alright–”
“I called in backup.” Bruce cut in, stopping Jason from trying to fight with an infant.
“What?”
“Hey guys.” Nightwing’s cheery voice greeted from the doorway.
“You’ve gotta be fuc–fudging kidding me.” Jason groaned. “There’s no way Dickwing’s gonna get the brat out. He’s a stubborn little shi– sugar cake.” He glanced at Tim who luckily hadn't seemed to pick up on Jason's stumbles, too busy cramming chocolate into his mouth.
“At least I won’t get swindled.” Dick said serenely, brushing past him.
Jason glared but said nothing. To try would just be digging his own grave. Again.
"Timmy?" Dick asked.
Tim growled, already picking up on Bruce's bad habits from the looks of it. "Who is it?" Dick smiled softly at the kid's suspicious tone.
Jason watched as he crouched down and peeked under the desk. "Hi." Dick grinned.
A loud gasp. "Dickie?"
Jason shook his head, there was no goddamn way–
"Want to see me do a quadruple somersault?" Dick said in reply.
A happy squeal and some shuffling later, Tim was out from under the desk and jumping into Dick's arms with a bright smile. Chocolate was smeared all over his face and hands but Dick didn’t seem to mind, too busy making a series of happy sounds only fit for dogs ears and squeezing Tim tight.
“How–?” Jason sputtered.
“They met when Tim was around this age.” Bruce said.
“Toddlers have short term memory. And Dick's a little different now, yeah?" Like fifteen years and three feet taller kind of different.
“You’re thinking of goldfish.” Bruce corrected. “And Tim isn’t like other children. He’s smart. He'd recognise Dick anywhere.”
Jason blinked. “Did you just call all other children dumb?”
Before Bruce could answer him, Dick walked over with Tim hitched on his hip, babbling away to him.
“And I run but they chase me, so I hide under there,” Tim pointed at the desk.
“Smart move.” Dick praised. Tim beamed up at him practically glowing.
“Yes and I get chocolate ‘cause I lie.” He said proudly.
“Lying is bad.” Jason grumbled.
“Not if it gets sweets." Tim started licking the melted chocolate off his hands.
"I thought Bristol brats were supposed to be well mannered." Jason wrinkled his nose at Tim.
Dick held the little goblin closer, glaring protectively. "He's doing his best."
"Dickie is the best." Tim said in-between attempts to eat his own hand.
Jason watched in horror as Dick's eyes practically melted with the warmth they were radiating. "My baby." Dick snuggled Tim closer to him.
"Actually–" Bruce went to interject.
"Mine." Dick said lightly, too lightly.
Bruce's lips turned down in a stern– jealous– frown. "But I adopted–"
"You call in the big guns, deal with the consequences." Jason said, mostly because he didn't want to deal with Tim or Dick's tantrums at this particular moment.
"Are we calling Zatanna?" Dick asked absently, more occupied with booping Tim's nose and cooing when Tim scrunched up his face in response.
"We'll need to run some tests first, just to be safe." Bruce said.
"You don't think this is Tim?" Jason asked with a scoff.
"I am Tim!" The toddler scowled at them.
"Of course you are, sweetie." Dick soothed, running a hand over Tim's hair. He shot Bruce a glare reminiscent of his early Nightwing days, back when Jason's ears would ring for hours after listening to their latest shouting match.
"Just to be safe." Bruce repeated. He looked at Tim. "Does that sound okay, little one?" His voice was softer than it had been since this all started.
Tim gasped as if coming to some grand realisation. "Boo." He pointed at Bruce, his eyes shining in awe.
Bruce froze. "No."
"Boo, you're Boo!" Tim grinned.
Bruce did that exasperated sigh-laugh of his and pulled back the cowl. "That's you figured out my identity twice now."
Tim giggled. "Boo looks silly."
At Jason and Dick's wide eyed looks, Bruce sighed.
"We met at a gala. Tim got lost and I helped him find his parents." He explained, his lips twitching when Tim grabbed his hand.
"Boo gives me treats." Tim informed them.
Jason shot Bruce a look. The bastard stood there, laughing at Jason for getting tricked by the little brat when he himself was just as bad.
"He was crying." Bruce said defensively.
"No wonder he didn't take you seriously when he became Robin." Dick remarked, smiling down at Tim fondly.
"Wait, you met him at that age and didn't adopt him?" Jason questioned incredulously.
There was no way that Bruce stumbled over a weird, vaguely adorable, unhappy kid and not tried to adopt them. It went against everything Jason knew about him.
"Janet said no." Bruce said, hushed and quick. Jason shared a look with Dick before they descended on Bruce like vultures on a carcass. "We should get to the Cave." Bruce spoke over their shouts, turning away and walking out of the apartment.
Jaaon grinned. This was gearing up to be a fun few hours.