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Jigen met Crazy Mash in a small border town in Bolivia, only a few dozen miles from Brazil. He’d made the mistake of stepping into a narrow, shadowy alley, even though he knew he’d find only trouble in places like that. But walking down the street in broad daylight was something that he’d forgotten how to do naturally years ago. These days, he felt out of place everywhere, but less so in the dark.
That day, the restless feeling in his gut was right. What he stumbled upon was a body on the ground and a man standing by it, holding a bloody knife. Not some cheap toy or something you grabbed off the kitchen counter in a fit of fury but a military-issued blade meant only for taking or ruining a life.
Jigen was sure his steps had been near silent, but the man turned around to stare at him, shoulders hunched, chest heaving with deep breaths. There was a gleam in his eyes that Jigen instantly recognized. For most people, killing was repulsive and forever broke something inside them. For many, it was business, and they could go home afterwards like they’d spent the day at the office. For some, it was something that gave them a kick they could get nowhere else.
It was clear what category this man belonged to. Later, when Jigen learned what everybody called him, he’d agree that Mash had earned his name.
“Hey,” he said, lifting both palms to show he wasn’t holding a weapon. He could take this man down with one bullet before he got close enough to strike him, but he didn’t want to get involved in whatever this was - disagreements among warring cartels or political assassination, or maybe just a local nutcase on a murder spree. Jigen had just finished a job as a bodyguard for a shady businessman’s daughter. He wanted no trouble when he was passing through the country and hoping to lie low for a while.
Lately, his time between jobs was becoming shorter and shorter. He was restless when he had no reason to hold a gun and found it too easy to grab on to a bottle instead. Some of his past jobs refused to become memories and kept repeating themselves at night.
“You his pal?” The man pushed at the body with his foot so Jigen could see the face better.
“Never seen the sucker before in my life. How about we agree I’ll forget that I did today?”
“Or I could make it so nobody can ever ask you. I’m in the mood for another.”
“I’m not scared of you,” Jigen said. He kept his voice low, like he was talking to calm a wild animal.
“Oh, yeah?” The man smiled wider, revealing a set of sharp teeth. He looked him up and down, but before he decided if he wanted to take him on, voices behind Jigen’s back caught their attention.
“Shit,” Jigen muttered when he turned to look and saw the goons with the guns. So much for not getting involved. He didn’t think anyone would care to listen that he had nothing to do with this murder and had just been the unlucky bastard to find the body. And the killer.
He didn’t wait to see what the other guy would do and jumped over the body, then around a corner to get away from the line of fire. There were gunshots behind him, oddly quiet and distant despite how close he was. He zigzagged along the alleys and squeezed his way through dirty hovels that were built so close they almost shared a wall until he was sure nobody would find him.
Letting out a sigh and patting his pockets for a cigarette, he leaned his back against a utility pole. He kept an eye on his surroundings from under his hat. There’d been people, women and kids mostly, as he’d made his way here, but now he was all alone. The windows were empty. No everyday chatter. Not even rats digging through the trash. That wasn’t a good sign.
He sensed rather than heard that someone was approaching. He dropped the lighter he’d just brought up to his cigarette, and before it hit the ground, his Magnum was ready in his hand.
“Drop it. Don’t move,” came the command from the man behind him. He sounded young, and there was a nervous edge to his voice. Probably a rookie who didn’t know what he was doing. Jigen could turn around and shoot him without even getting hit. But it was this type of guys that he hated facing the most.
“I had nothing to do with your man getting gutted back there,” he said.
“Y-yeah, right. I said drop it!”
Jigen began to turn around.
“Don’t move! Drop the gun!”
So much for handling this the nice way. Jigen pretended that he was bending down to place his Magnum at his feet, but a second later he’d -
There was a loud crack and a groan behind his back. He whirled around, just in time to see the man he’d been talking to fall to his knees and then to his side as a limp heap, his gun slipping from his fingers. By his side was a clay pot, cleanly split in two from hitting his head.
Jigen pointed his gun up before he even saw who was there. He was expecting some stupid kid, but then he recognized the grinning face of the killer from before.
“Hey, relax. No need to point that thing at me,” he said. He climbed out the window and began to come down, nimble as a monkey. When he got low enough, he jumped the rest of the way and patted his hands on his pants. Jigen noted there was more blood on him, which probably explained why only one guy had made it this far.
“What do you want?” he asked.
“A thank-you would be a start.”
“I didn’t ask for help. I was going to deal with him. Besides, it’s your fault I got dragged into this.” Jigen was itching to light the cigarette that was dangling from his mouth, but he’d lost sight of the lighter he’d dropped.
“Oh, yeah, tough guy? You’ve got an impressive gun. Know how to handle it?”
“Is that a challenge?” Jigen didn’t like dick measuring contests with punks like this, but the guy was starting to piss him off.
“No, it’s just that there’s more people on the way, and I could use some back-up.” The man opened his jacket to show he had a Glock strapped to his side. That put aside Jigen’s worries that he was dealing with some local madman who just liked to kill people in alleyways. The guy was a professional.
“I guess now that they’ve seen us together, I can’t just walk away and think they’ll let me be. Just tell me what this is all about so I know what I’m sticking my neck out for.”
“Ehh,” the man said with a shrug, “I got hired to bump off someone who bumped off someone else. It probably goes back and forth even more than that.”
“And now there’s an army of guys after you just for that?”
The man flashed him a grin. “He was the only son of the local drug lord. I’d say there’s going to be a lot of chaos in these parts soon when people start fighting over the business.”
Jigen spat out his cigarette. “Tch, typical.”
“I’ve got a car ready. If we make it through these slums alive, we can be across the border in no time.”
It was madness to go with someone he’d just met, someone who was still stained with the blood of the people he’d killed, but it was the best chance of getting out of town in one piece. And it wasn’t like Jigen could judge. When he bought a new suit and put it on for the first time, he could already smell the stench of death on it.
They ran along the narrow alleys, rushed through abandoned buildings, waited in the shadows and let their assailants pass. Jigen was on edge the whole time. He couldn’t trust this man, and there was a good chance he’d just stab him in the back and leave him behind as a distraction before they got to the car. But there was something irresistible about him and his sharp eyes and how hot his breath was against Jigen’s neck when they were pressed together behind a trash container, watching the car he’d said was his. It was a battered Jeep with its sides wide open. They’d be easy targets.
“They’ll give chase. I drive. You shoot. Okay?”
“That’s what I do best,” Jigen said.
Afterwards, he had a hard time believing they’d both made it through the ensuing car chase alive and without serious injuries. He’d barely gotten inside the Jeep before the man stepped on it and they took off, sand flying up in their wake and one of Jigen’s legs still dangling outside.
“Hey, watch it!” he snapped and instinctively sank down on the seat when a bullet whipped past him.
“Live a little,” the man said.
“That’s what I’m trying to do!”
The answer he got was a cackle that made him pause just for a moment as he was reloading his Magnum. He glanced at his unwanted companion and saw him grinning from ear to ear, a wild gleam in his eyes. He was having fun. Jigen didn’t remember the last time he could have said the same.
When there were no more cars after them, the man stopped the Jeep and stood up to have a look at the road behind them. He whistled, impressed.
“Looks like you took them all out. I usually prefer doing the chasing, but all that carnage made it worth being the prey this time. I’m Mash.”
He offered Jigen his hand. It had splotches of dried blood on it.
Jigen hesitated only for a moment before he shook it. In his mind, it wasn’t like his was any cleaner.
***
They took turns driving and sleeping until they were deep enough into Brazil that it was safe to stop. Mash had gas and supplies to last them a few days, but he’d planned to be on the run alone, so there wasn’t enough for them both for long.
“Just drop me off anywhere where I can get my own car,” Jigen said.
“What’s the hurry?”
“The longer I stay with you, the more trouble I’ll be in.”
Mash laughed. “A guy who handles a gun like you has enough enemies of his own, I bet. What are a few more?”
“I didn’t mean the guys who’re after you,” Jigen said. Any time it was his turn to sleep, he did so with one eye open. There was no reason for Mash not to stab or shoot him and kick his body out of the car to bleed out on the road. He didn’t need him anymore. All Jigen was to him now was a waste of supplies.
“What, don’t you like me?”
“Not really.”
“Aw, too bad. It’s been a while since I traveled with a buddy.”
“And why is that?”
“I like working alone.”
“So do I. Then there’s nothing stopping us from parting ways next time we reach a town.”
The town where they stopped was so small it was more like a village. Jigen managed to talk someone into selling a car to him, so all that was left was getting a drink or two, the first decent night of sleep in days, and he’d be off. He bid farewell to Mash with a casual shrug and hoped he wouldn’t run into him again.
Unfortunately, there was only one bar, so it was some twenty minutes later that he found himself sharing a space with him. Mash was sitting by the counter, drink in hand, and chatting with the waitress. She was a delicate, pretty thing, and Jigen couldn’t help but think she was the local flower to all the men in town. He was glad she was keeping Mash busy so he could get his drink and withdraw to a table in the corner.
There were a few other patrons, and someone was playing the guitar on the other side of the room. It was a cozy atmosphere. Jigen relaxed his shoulders as he leaned back. He never stopped watching the others, just in case, but this was better than nothing. Sometimes he wondered if there’d ever be a day when he could completely let his guard down and just enjoy himself.
He listened with half an ear as Mash tried to talk to the waitress in a mangled mix of Spanish and English. She replied in Portuguese, her words sharp. Jigen hadn’t paid enough attention to know what they were talking about, but she was saying no to him. Repeatedly. Mash grabbed her wrist and twisted it, and her cry of pain got everyone’s attention. Multiple men around the bar started getting up.
Jigen saw it with his mind’s eye. Mash would kill all of these people, and he’d be blamed, too, since they’d arrived in town together.
“Hey, Mash!” he called out, loud enough to make everyone turn. He went over to him and put an arm around his shoulder. “Let’s go.”
“Wha-? Where are we going?” Mash’s words were slurred, and he stumbled along as Jigen began to lead him away.
“Out.”
“I’m not done yet!” Mash objected, but he didn’t put up a fight.
Before they reached the door, he turned back one more time and glared at the waitress. Jigen caught the look in his eyes. The bloodlust in them chilled him. He’d seen plenty of guys who couldn’t take no for an answer, but there was something disturbing on Mash’s face, just for a moment, before a smile took its place and he leaned his head against Jigen’s shoulder.
“Oh, so you like me after all?”
“Not particularly. I just don’t want you to kill anyone else when I’m around.”
“We could kill them together.”
“I only take a life when I have to.”
Mash’s laughter rang loud in the empty street. They were walking towards the room that Jigen had rented for the night.
“Aw, that’s real chivalrous. You think that makes a difference to anyone? You think you’re better than me?”
“No. I’m not stupid.”
“Good. I hate stupid people.”
Mash’s breath stank of booze. He was a heavier man than Jigen had realized, and walking when he was half-leaning on him was getting harder with every step. They stumbled over their own feet and almost fell multiple times before they reached the little house where Jigen was staying.
Nobody was home even though it was getting late. He figured the owner had gone over to someone else rather than risk spending the night under the same roof with an ominous stranger. People had been reacting like that to him for years, but Jigen had no idea what it was about him that made it so clear that it was for the best to avoid him. Had he gotten so used to it that he no longer saw it?
“You can have the bed,” he said and was about to toss Mash on it, but the other slid a hand across his chest and then up to his shoulder so he was clinging to Jigen with both arms. His weight pulled them down. Jigen clicked his tongue in annoyance and began to untangle himself and get off the bed, only to stop when he felt Mash’s hands move down his sides and hips and grab his thighs.
Jigen froze. He’d imagined a lot of things that might happen if he stayed with Mash for too long, but this hadn’t been one of them. There’d been no hints over the past few days.
“Do me a favor, yeah?” Mash said, looking straight up at him with clouded eyes.
“You’re drunk,” Jigen said.
“That’s when I can do this,” Mash replied and moved a hand to support his frame while he rose up to kiss him.
It was a bad idea. Jigen knew there would be nothing good if he went along with this, but then again, there almost never was when got involved with someone. Relationships weren’t for people like him. Hook-ups carried more risk than they were worth. But no matter how many times he told himself that, he couldn’t stop chasing the feeling that someone in the world wanted him, even if only for a fraction of a night.
Mash’s lips were rough, and so were his hands. There’d be bruises to count next time Jigen changed his shirt. He didn’t mind. This was how he liked it with men like this, the ache a constant reminder that this was the best he had the right to ask for.
It was more drunken groping on Mash’s part than sex. Very quickly, he decided he didn’t like to lie down with Jigen’s body pinning him to the bed. Jigen let him do what he wanted - shove him down, bite his neck, dig his fingers into his sides and thighs and grind against him - and wondered if he was more interested in hurting him than making either of them come.
Some guys were like that, but Jigen wasn’t into that sort of thing.
“Let me try something,” he said and reached for Mash’s belt. He unbuckled it and started to pull down his pants, and Mash went still and buried his face in the crook of Jigen’s neck. It was an unexpected reaction, and for a while Jigen didn’t know what to do.
“You still want this?” he asked.
“Do it.”
Mash sounded like a man telling the firing squad to pull the trigger, but his cock was hard and hot in Jigen’s hand. They had no lube, so Jigen spat into his other hand; that and precum would have to be enough. He didn’t really care how pleasant it was going to be, but he didn’t like hurting people on purpose.
After a few moments, he felt Mash relax and begin to move to meet his strokes. He took it as a sign to close his fingers around him and run his thumb across his tip. A little too rough, judging by the way Mash’s hips jerked and how he hissed swears into his ear.
Jigen was lying on his back on the rickety bed, Mash in his lap. He couldn’t reach between his own legs when Mash was in the way, so he hoped the other would return the favor when he was done. Some guys didn’t, but Jigen had been through so much shit because of Mash that he hoped he wasn’t one of them. Just having a warm, heavy body on top of him after so long was enough to get Jigen aroused, and he wanted more than his own hand.
His breathing loud and erratic, Mash spilled himself into Jigen’s hand and grabbed tightly onto him as he came back down from his high. Jigen wiped the mess on the bed and shifted under him, pushing at Mash’s knees with his hands to encourage him to move back and shove a hand into his pants as payback.
Mash sat up straight. He was looking at Jigen through sweaty hair over his eyes. At first, Jigen couldn’t read the look on his face but figured he was still in a daze or too drunk or both, but then complete rage twisted his features.
“I’m going to kill you!” Both of his hands came to Jigen’s throat and pressed down, and it was so sudden that for a second Jigen could only make a gagging sound and stare up at him with wide eyes.
But only for a second. He’d slept with enough men in the underworld to know you could never let your guard down, even in bed. Especially in bed. With a swift movement, he grabbed the Magnum he’d taken off his belt and left within reach and pointed it right between Mash’s eyes.
“A bullet would look great here,” he said in a strained voice, “but we both know you wouldn’t have much of a head left at this distance.”
Mash froze and stared at the gun, and just as Jigen was starting to think he’d have no choice but pull the trigger, he felt the pressure ease. Mash let go and fell back so he was sitting between Jigen’s spread legs, his pants down to his thighs. Jigen might have laughed if not for the pain in his throat - and the fact that, honestly, it was a pretty sad sight.
“Is that the thanks I get after getting you off?”
“I’m… I…” Mash seemed lost but quickly collected himself. “If you ever tell anyone, I’ll kill you!”
He had lost his bite. He wasn’t looking at Jigen anymore. He was shivering even though it was a tropical night where just sitting still was enough to make you break out in sweat. Jigen almost expected him to start crying.
“I’m not going to tell anyone,” he said in a low voice. “I don’t boast about my sex life. I have to keep quiet about some things in the world I live in. But I think you already know that. Do you always kill everyone you sleep with?”
Maybe that whole story about being hired to kill the guy in the street had been bullshit. Maybe he’d been Mash’s previous hook-up. After the look he’d seen on his face, Jigen could believe he was the type who took his self-loathing out on others.
To his credit, Mash looked embarrassed. He ran a hand through his hair to get it out of his face. There was something boyish about the gesture even though he couldn’t be more than a few years younger than Jigen.
“I lost my temper,” Mash said.
“Really? That was a bit more than that.”
Mash made a face that looked awfully like a pout. “I never do it with guys like you. I pay someone harmless who knows nothing about me and who can’t come after me. You’re a pro. You might talk to people I know. I might see you again. ”
“I don’t think I was so bad you’d want to avoid me forever,” Jigen said, hoping to lighten the mood. He could sympathize, but he didn’t want to have a heart to heart with him. He’d reveal too much about himself if he did. “And believe it or not, so far this isn’t even the worst I’ve had.”
Mash laughed a little, then eyed him up and down. Especially down. “If you’re still in the mood, I can take care of it.”
“You think I’ll let you in my pants after you tried to strangle me?” Jigen asked.
“Some people would just be more excited.”
Jigen couldn’t say all or even most of his past flames had been good for him, but it was hard to meet decent guys in his line of work. He liked to think he could draw the line somewhere, though, and this was where it should be.
Then again, he was still horny.
“Okay, but my gun will be on your neck the whole time.”
The grin Mash gave him told him that he didn’t mind one bit.
They parted ways in the morning, Jigen continuing east and Mash backtracking to Bolivia to collect his payment. They didn’t exchange contact information.
***
To his surprise, it was only some half a year later that Jigen heard a familiar voice call out his name. He’d just arrived in a small nation in Southeast Asia that was boiling with the threat of a civil war. Jigen detested war for what it did to regular people, but it was easy to fool himself into thinking it had nothing to do with him. A good sniper didn’t reveal his position by shooting civilians.
He looked around until he saw Mash among the men who’d come to pick up the new recruits from the airport. He was wearing a combat uniform and had a rifle hanging on a sling over his shoulder. He’d begun to comb his hair back since last time, and Jigen couldn’t help but think it was a good look on him.
“Hey, Mash,” he said, wondering if he was mad they’d run into each other again. “Didn’t think I’d see you here.”
“Why?”
Jigen took a look around. Most people he saw were dressed in military get-up, but since this was the anti-government side, the chain of command and order were less rigid. Still, Mash had said he liked working alone, so it was a surprise to see him in a place where you were expected to follow orders and be part of a team.
Maybe they were more alike than he’d thought. Jigen accepted jobs like this when he felt he couldn’t bear his loneliness anymore. Men grew close in combat zones where any moment could be the last. Everyone was accepted for who they were. It was the only time and place where he could cry together with someone.
“Never mind. So, who’s going to show me the ropes around here? Hope it’s not you.”
It wasn’t, but he ended up spending a lot of time with him anyway. To Jigen’s surprise, Mash was popular with the others. The men, specifically. Jigen watched him joke and laugh with them and decided that camaraderie was probably why Mash had signed the contract. He couldn’t imagine he was sleeping with any of them, not after the way he’d acted.
The few women they had in camp avoided him. Jigen made a casual comment about it one night when he and Mash were making rounds in the rainforest.
“They can sense I hate them. It wouldn’t bother me if they all died when the fighting starts,” Mash said. They were speaking quietly, but in the dark, Mash’s voice made Jigen feel like he was completely engulfed by the other man’s presence.
“What did they do to earn that?”
“Nothing. That’s the thing.”
Jigen recalled the waitress in Brazil. At the time, he’d thought Mash was upset because she was refusing his advances. A lot of men hated women because they didn’t want to sleep with them. He was starting to think it was the opposite with Mash. He hated women because he wasn’t into them, and the whole world expected him to.
Jigen had griped about women more times than he cared to count, but it was more akin to frustration that spilled over sometimes. He’d never hated anyone just for being a woman, but the women he did hate had given him plenty of good reasons to.
“I have enough enemies without making more for dumb reasons,” he said. “And we’re all comrades here. I care about every life on our side.”
“I knew you were a softie,” Mash said. He laughed, but Jigen didn’t feel like he was mocking him.
They had sex before it was time to return to camp. Just like last time, they had nothing to ease the way, but Jigen enjoyed the roughness and burn on his skin. Mash wasn’t considerate enough to leave bruises only in places that wouldn’t be seen, but Jigen knew nobody would question him if they noticed them. It made him feel good to think that someone had left a mark on him.
It went on like that for weeks. They didn’t see any action in battle, but there was practice every day. Time felt like it was standing still, every day like the other as they waited for the powder keg of a country to explode. Jigen got to know most of the people in camp and made friends, and he hoped to see them again if they survived the fighting when it finally started. He felt like he belonged among them.
He thought of the others as comrades, and then there was Mash. He stood out. Easily a head taller than most of the others, always ready to laugh at something even when it wasn’t funny. Often, the more cruel a joke was, the more amusing he found it. He was a nasty piece of work, and yet everybody liked him. He was carefree, confident, and efficient, and being around him made you feel like you could be like that, too, if you just chose his side.
Mash was good with any weapon. He couldn’t shoot like Jigen, but nobody in camp could beat him in hand to hand combat. Some came close, but Mash had a mean streak and played even dirtier than the others, so he always came out on top. Those moments were when Jigen liked him the most; there was a fire burning in his eyes, a greedy look like nothing would ever be enough for him. They had the best sex when they found a moment alone to do it right after Mash had beaten the hell out of someone.
He knew it was a mistake to get attached, but he couldn’t help the way his chest felt comfortably tight when he saw Mash comb his hair in the morning.
“You know, I like you, Jigen,” Mash said once when they had time to lie around a little.
“I would hope so, considering how long we’ve been doing this.”
“What are you going to do once this is all over?”
“It’s a bit too early to make plans when we haven’t even started fighting yet.”
“Oh, come on. Don’t try to act so damn cool all the time. I like it when you show some emotion.”
“Is that why you’re always so rough with me?” Jigen asked and handed Mash his cigarette. They were a luxury right now, so they shared them and made sure to smoke each to the very end. It was a good deal for Jigen. Mash didn’t much care for cigarettes, so Jigen got to smoke most of his, too.
“If you weren’t into it, you wouldn’t let me.”
Jigen let out a low sound of agreement. He liked being with Mash. It was comfortable to have someone to turn to without having to take the risk that maybe you’d read all the signs wrong and the other guy wasn’t into men after all. He liked Mash’s sharp tongue and how he didn’t let anyone walk over him but how he bristled up from one well-aimed, sarcastic comment. Jigen didn’t normally think of other men as cute, but in those moments he didn’t know what else to call him.
What was he going to do after this? He had no idea. He didn’t plan the next job when he was still in the middle of the old one. He’d just signed for another two months in the rebel army, not wanting to leave without having done anything.
“How about you? What’re you going to do?”
“I don’t know. I’ll tell you when I’ve made up my mind.”
Jigen felt warm at the indirect promise in those words. He reached for the cigarette in Mash’s mouth and leaned much closer to get it than he had to.
***
Mash had a dream. It was one week later that Jigen learned what it was. They’d been sent to pick up supplies at the small local airport - this part of the country was sympathetic to the rebels, so they could come and go nearly unrestricted. A plane had just landed, and men were coming down. All of them were carrying a weapon of some kind, many of them more than one.
Jigen whistled. Even at a distance, he could see they were armed with the best money could buy, and there was no doubt a lot more still on the plane.
“I guess that’s the elite mercenary force that they’ve been talking about. Black Buzzards, I think. Should turn the tide in our favor when the fighting starts,” he said.
He took the crate he was carrying to their truck. When he came back to pick up another, he saw that Mash was standing right where he’d left him, still looking at the new arrivals.
“Someone there you know?” Jigen asked.
“No.”
“Then what’s so interesting? We’ll get to meet them soon.”
Mash spat at his feet. “Guys like that stick to themselves. We’re cannon fodder to them.”
“Maybe,” Jigen agreed.
“But that’s going to be me one day. Just watch.”
“You want to join a group like that?”
“No, I’ll make my own. Take only the best men, train them myself, get the best weapons, and charge any price I want. It’ll be my own little army.”
Jigen let out a bark of laughter at the boasting, but he saw the furious look on Mash’s face and realized he was being serious. If he made fun of this, it might be the first time he managed to hurt him. Not that Mash didn’t deserve it for how he treated others, but Jigen didn’t want to be the one to do it.
“Sorry, it’s not a bad idea. Hell knows I feel like tying myself to something permanent sometimes, rather than… this,” he said and made a vague gesture with his hand. “I’ve just never seriously thought about it. I’m no leadership material.”
“You don’t have to. You can be my right-hand man.”
“What? Me?” Jigen asked, and he couldn’t stop the laughter this time.
“Yeah, why not? You’re the best gunman there is. It only makes sense that you’d be part of my elite troops.”
Mash looked so excited about the idea that Jigen didn’t have the heart to tell him that if he could choose what kind of jobs he took, he’d be a bodyguard. The problem was, most jobs like that he’d gotten weren’t actually about protecting anyone or anything, more like a hitman and a secretary combined. Maybe he was too conceited, thinking that if there was something worth protecting out there, anyone would hire a man with such bloody hands to look after it.
Mash’s idea was a pipe dream. Jigen had given up on dreams a long time ago. But it was nice to fool himself just a little and imagine that this could come true, that he could stay with Mash and they could be the best together. He’d noticed that there were brief moments when Mash softened around him and became almost affectionate. Life didn’t seem so bleak when he heard Mash laugh.
Maybe they were good for each other.
“You’re going to need a lot of money to pull that off,” he said. Only the top got paid so well it was worth it in their line of work, and even they had to spend a lot of it on supplies, security, and travel. There was often barely anything left once the next job started. If Mash was serious about his plans, he’d have to do something big to get the startup capital.
“I know,” Mash said. He picked up the crate at his feet and started taking it to the truck. “But for this, I’d do anything. I don’t care what I have to do or who I have to kill. I’ll make it happen.”
“Big talk,” Jigen said softly and hurried after him. They had to get back to the camp before the road turned impassable. The dark clouds building up in the horizon were a promise of rain.