Archive of Our Own

Contrary to people's belief, Bangtan's popularity hadn't dimmed after enlistment. If anything, it had soared even higher. By the time Jin enlisted, the boys had already built their brand. They were invincible; turning anything they touched into gold.

The reaction to the first comeback after Jimin was discharged, being the last to serve, was unbelievable, proving that the boys still got it and the fandom hadn't deserted them like many thought or wished for.

Today, their schedule was packed. They had a fan sign, a few photoshoots and an interview. The boys were chill throughout the day, having got used to the pressure. The army also had done them good, teaching them how to deal with it. They learned how to center their chi even in the midst of the worst crisis.

Everything was going well...that was until the interview part.

"I know it's a sensitive subject," the journalist started, "but I must ask," 

Bangtan stiffened, chancing glances at each other, knowing what was to come. 

"It had been years and with the 7th anniversary coming, I wonder if it has become easier to deal with the absence." the journalist inquired. 

The boys kept quiet at first, looking at each other for support, before Hoseok took the mic. 

"It'll never be easy," he admitted. 

Jimin glanced at their manager, motioning to intervene in case the journalist insisted on more questions about the accident. 

"There hadn't been a day that we didn't think of them, missed them," Hoseok carried on, voicing what the members felt. "But we learned to accept it, at least part of it. After all, Taehyung and Jungkook weren't just our members. They were our brothers." 

"I understand," the journalist said sympathetically and moved on to another subject. 

Jimin was glad because the dam was broken. He was also glad to be sitting in the back. This way he could wipe the tears threatening to fall out of his orbs. 

The guy had just rubbed salt over a very sensitive wound; one that refused to heal even seven years later. 

"Drop me to my apartment," Jimin instructed their driver once they all slipped inside the van. 

"We have a concert tomorrow, so it'd be better if we all slept at the dorm," Yoongi suggested. 

Jimin shook his head. "I'll drive straight to the venue for rehearsals. Now, I need to be by myself." 

"I didn't know he would ask about it," Sejin muttered from the front seat. "I would have removed that question." 

"I wasn't prepared," Jin admitted. "It had been years since anyone mentioned it in interviews."

"I can't believe it had been seven years," Namjoon sounded choked. 

The boys looked in his direction and pursed their lips tightly to see him fighting against his tears. 

"Please, hurry up," Jimin begged the driver. He needed to get out soon and fast. He was on the verge of a breakdown. He sensed Yoongi clasp his hand and he squeezed it in gratitude. 

When he finally made it home, he headed straight to the mini-bar and grabbed a bottle of whiskey before he disappeared into his bedroom. 

One glass in and the memories came flooding.

-=oOo=-

Bangtan boys were getting ready backstage. They had just released an album and tonight was the showcase.

Jimin was getting his makeup done when he felt arms circle his neck from behind. Looking at the mirror, he saw Taehyung, hugging him tightly.

“Hey, Taetae,” Jimin clasped Taehyung’s arm with his hand. “Are you okay?”

Taehyung nodded in his neck and remained in that position for a while. Jimin let him, sensing that his best friend needed the contact, especially after what happened.

Taehyung had yet to recover from the trauma of being kidnapped by sasaengs. The incident took a toll on him that he couldn’t let people come close to him anymore. It was only recently that he opened up to them and the staff. He only felt safe around Jungkook. However, if his boyfriend was busy, then it was the boys’ turn to shower Taehyung with affection.

“You’re good, Tae,” Jimin kissed his temple. “We’re here for you.”

“It’s live and the first time I’ll perform in front of an audience after what happened,” Taehyung admitted. “I’m scared shitless.”

“Nothing will happen,” Jimin reassured him. “You’re a professional. You’ll do well as usual. I believe in you.”

Taehyung nodded in his neck again.

When the makeup artist declared Jimin ready to go, he stood up and took Taehyung in his arms, hugging him properly while guiding him towards the couch.

He hated what his best friend had come to.

Taehyung used to be the life of the party, spreading joy wherever he went. He still did, but something shifted in him throughout the years. Jimin could see the glimmer in his eyes evaporate bit by bit until it was gone.

The sasaengs’ incident was the last straw.

Taehyung was already dealing with the pressure of being gay in a homophobic country and then being in a relationship with Jungkook. It was a lot to handle, but the two loved each other passionately and promised to fight against all odds together. However, when Taehyung was kidnapped by sasaengs during the last hiatus and was beaten for hours, things took an ugly turn.

Taehyung left the hospital three weeks afterwards and went straight to therapy. Jungkook went with him to every session, being his support system.

That was six months ago.

“Baby,” Jungkook joined them at last.

Taehyung automatically went to him, wrapping his arms around him. “Done with your makeup?”

Jungkook hummed and hugged him, nuzzling his neck softly. “What’s wrong?” He looked at Jimin, who was regarding them with warmth in his eyes.

He was so proud of them and their love. He wished he could help them have it easy, but he knew it wasn’t in his hands. He wished he could protect them from anything and everything, but he knew the world was too powerful to fight, too ugly to struggle against.

“Are you still nervous about the concert?” Jungkook guided him back to the couch, still holding him.

Taehyung shook his head, whispering something in his ear. Jungkook nodded and whispered something back. Jimin saw his sign to give them privacy.

“Are they okay?” Namjoon wondered when Jimin joined him and the rest of the boys.

“Taehyung is nervous about the concert,” Jimin explained.

“It’s normal,” Jin replied. “It had been a while since we performed. I’m shitting myself as we speak.”

The guys cackled as they were ushered towards their stage at last. Jimin chanced a glance at the couple and spotted them kissing. He smiled gently, seeing them keep their pre-performance tradition. The two made sure to kiss before every performance to wish each other good luck and calm their nerves. Sometimes, it was just a small peck. Other times, it was a hard and passionate kiss. It was tradition that they started and kept since they got together almost six years ago.

They deserved to be happy, Jimin believed. They had suffered enough. Management had come up with a solution to help them; one that the members found hard to accept, knew they would suffer because of, but it had to be done. They just didn’t know when.

Now if only Jimin knew that would be the last time he would see his two best friends.

-=oOo=-

The TV was blaring in the background, the news segment running for over an hour. An empty glass of whiskey sat at the edge of his nightstand, half an empty bottle nearby. Jimin sat, hunched really, on his bed with his head in his hands, his elbows resting on his knees.

His eyes wandered tiredly over his other nightstand. There were a couple of framed pictures, but only one stood out.

He sighed, feeling the tiredness of the day catching up to him at last. He was so exhausted he could sleep for a month, a year, forever maybe.

He grabbed the picture frame and stared at it. He remembered the day it was taken. It was during one of the RUN episodes. The maknae line was assigned to be in the same team and the trio had a blast that day, playing video games.

Jimin took in every detail of the picture, especially the bright smiles that decorated Taehyung and Jungkook’s features. They looked so happy, so at peace.

They were now wherever they were.

They were at peace.

They were safe from sasaengs.

They were safe from the judgmental stares of society.

They were also never coming back.

“Fuck,”

He thought he was doing well; he truly did. But the interview earlier rubbed him the wrong way, unleashed a demon he thought had long was put to rest. Now, he had awoken with vengeance.

Placing the picture on the nightstand was a step whereby he attempted to show himself and others that he had moved on since it took him a year to be able to see pictures or watch videos of them without breaking down. The picture on the nightstand was meant to be symbolic, that life was returning to its usual way, but the more he stared at it now, he found he absolutely couldn’t do it. He couldn’t move on. He could only master the concealment of his anguish better than before.

He still remembered that day.

Right after they had finished the showcase, they left in separate vans towards their houses, planning to meet up for practice the next day. Taehyung and Jungkook left together to their apartment. That was the last time they saw them.

An hour later, Jimin received a call from Sejin. He almost fainted when their manager told him.

Taehyung and Jungkook had an accident.

Next day, they were pronounced dead.

They were gone.

They were never coming back.

He had never felt his chest aching that way. Someone was ripping his heart out. Tears soaked his cheeks. He couldn’t move. He just cried for God only knew how long.

Everything else was a blur.

The funeral.

The press conference after the funeral.

The aftermath.

That was seven years ago.

Would it ever stop hurting?

-=oOo=-

“Jimin,” The woman was surprised as she opened the door to him.

“Hey, aunty,” Jimin greeted softly. “Sorry for dropping by unannounced,”

“No, don’t apologize, please,” The woman was quick to wrap him in her arms. “Welcome, darling.”

Jimin closed his eyes and held her back.

She was Taehyung’s mom.

Jimin was at Taehyung’s parents’ home.

He made sure to visit whenever his schedule allowed him to. He made sure to after the funeral. He already loved Taehyung’s family, but after what happened, they grew closer, bonding over the pain of the loss.

He wished he could say the same about Jungkook’s family.

Things turned sore between them when Jungkook came out to them and announced that he was in a relationship with Taehyung. They cut ties with him immediately. Only his brother remained in touch, fully supporting Jungkook and his relationship. When the accident happened, the parents only showed up out of duty for the funeral.

That was the last time Jimin had seen them.

“Where are the others?” Jimin wondered as he walked inside, Taehyung’s mom guiding him to the living room.

“My husband is shopping for grocery,” Taehyung’s mom said. “And the kids are still in school.”

Jimin chuckled at that. They were hardly kids anymore. They were both high-schoolers, but there was something about parents always seeing their children as kids regardless of how old they were.

“Lunch is ready,” Taehyung’s mom said. “We’ll just wait for my husband to return. What would you like to drink meanwhile?”

Jimin sat down on one of the couches. “Coffee would do,”

She nodded and left to make it for him. Jimin glanced around the room. Nothing had changed since his last visit a few months ago. He suddenly heard the main door slam open, indicating that the Kim Senior had returned.

“Chim Chim, what a lovely surprise!” The man exclaimed happily.

Jimin jumped to help him with the grocery bags. He waited till he placed them on the kitchen counter to turn towards him for greeting.

“We missed you,” Taehyung’s father confessed.

“I missed you, too,” Jimin hugged him tight.

“I guess coffee shall be put on hold for now?” Taehyung’s mom wondered.

Jimin nodded. “I’m starving,”

Taehyung’s parents laughed. “Let’s get the table ready then,”

Lunch was a satisfying and delightful affair. They updated each other on what happened recently, exchanging jokes and reminiscing of the old days. When they finished, Jimin offered to help clean up, but the couple denied, ushering him out to the living room again while they did that.

“Have you heard anything?” He asked later.

The parents looked at each before they shook their heads. Jimin sighed in defeat.

It had been seven years. He had asked the same question every time he dropped by. And he always got the same answer.

“I pray they’re doing okay wherever they are,” Taehyung’s mom said.

Taehyung’s father grabbed her hand and squeezed it gently. “We miss him and Jungkook, but we’re glad they’re safe. At least, we hope so.”

“I pray for the same.” Jimin whispered.

-=oOo=-

The members were at the label. Bang PD called for a meeting in his office to discuss their upcoming schedule and some endorsement deals they had received.

“Where is it?” Sihyuk fumbled with the folders in front of him.

“What is it?” Namjoon inquired.

“A red folder,” Sihyuk kept searching for it until it dawned on him. “Oh, silly me. It’s still inside the safe.”

“I’ll get it for you,” Jimin offered, standing up already.

Sihyuk smiled. “Thank you. The safe is open. Just get the red folder.”

Jimin nodded and walked towards the safe. Sihyuk turned to Yoongi and Namjoon to talk about the new album while the others listened. Jimin pulled a stack of folders he found inside the safe. He went through them one by one to find the red one.

He frowned in confusion when he found one labeled Tae&Guk. His curiosity urged him to flip it open, only to almost drop it.

“What,” He felt his throat dry as he took in the pictures atop several papers. His eyes fell on words such as Europe and Austria, but he was quick to go back to the pictures.

They were of Taehyung and Jungkook. Normal, right? Their CEO would definitely have pictures of their previous members, right? Yes, it was normal. What wasn’t okay and what made Jimin’s heartbeat accelerate was the fact that the pictures looked recent; Taehyung and Jungkook looked older.

The two were standing in front of a coffee shop, talking then laughing and finally kissing. The Eclipse, the name of the shop read. They were unaware that someone was taking their pictures.

Jimin’s hands were shaking he felt he could drop the folder. He felt his world tilting.

In the midst of his panic attack, he managed to grab his phone to take pictures before Sihyuk noticed. Nothing made sense now, but he felt that it would once he showed his members.

Closing the folder and grabbing the one he was seeking, he retreated to Sihyuk and handed it to him. He then acted throughout the whole meeting like nothing had happened; as if he hadn’t just stumbled upon a lead he didn’t see coming.

-=oOo=-

“I don’t know what to think,” Hoseok admitted after long minutes of tense silence.

“It’s obvious,” Namjoon said. “the truth is staring right at us,” he pointed to the pictures in Jimin’s phone. “They look older; there is no doubt about it.”

“You can see mountains behind the coffee shop,” Yoongi pointed out. “It looks like they are indeed in Europe.”

“In Austria,” Jimin added. “I don’t know what that stack of papers contained, but I could see Austria written on the first page.”

“So, what can we do now?” Namjoon addressed the main issue. “Shall we drop it and move on or search for answers?”

“No way in hell I’d let this drop,” Hoseok spat seriously. “I’d search for them all over Europe on feet if it’s what it would take.”

“I’m with Hobi,” Yoongi announced. “I need to see them. I need to hold them, make sure that they’re okay. I need it to be able to breathe again”

“I think you’re missing the point here,” Jin rubbed his temple, sighing in exasperation.

“Which is?” Namjoon inquired.

“Taehyung and Jungkook left everything behind,” Jin started. “It means they don’t want to be found. I think we should respect their decisions and let them be.”

Jimin scoffed. “You’re so chill about it. Are you sure you were affected by their absence all those years?” He spat before he could stop himself.

“How fucking dare you,” Jin was on him instantly, grabbing his collar and pulling him to his feet. “You know more than anyone how much I hurt, still do, over them. How much of a failure I felt because I couldn’t protect them.”

“Then, let’s not play pretend,” Jimin didn’t look fazed by his reaction. “I can’t be the only one missing them like crazy, worrying about them.”

“Calm down, please,” Namjoon pleaded, placing himself between the two to break them apart.

“I’m calm,” Jimin muttered, still glaring at Jin.

“You think you’re the only one who suffered their loss,” Jin spat back. “You think you had it the hardest because you were the closest to them. Well, let me break it to you; that wasn’t the case at all. We all loved them in our own way and their absence affected us tremendously. I saw them as my brothers, even my kids. I wished on several nights that it was me rather than them.”

“Let’s not argue about who loved them more,” Hoseok let out a deep breath. “We all did, okay? So, let’s drop it.”

“Don’t test me again, Jimin,” Jin’s nostrils flared in anger before he went back to his seat on the couch.

Jimin fixed his clothes before following suit.

“I have a friend,” Yoongi sat next to Jimin, wrapping his arm around his shoulder. Jimin instantly leaned against him. “I could ask for his help to locate where the pictures were taken.”

“Can he be trusted?” Namjoon wanted to make sure.

Yoongi nodded. “I trust him with my life. I won’t give him the details and I’m sure he won’t ask.”

“Do it, then,” Hoseok decided on their behalf, knowing they wouldn’t argue. “Put us out of our misery.”

-=oOo=-

It took a week for Yoongi’s friend to text back with an address. The group kept mum about it, keeping it from management, and on the first break they could get, they booked separate flights to several countries in Europe, planning to gather in Austria. They lied about going on a short trip across Europe, but they didn’t mention anything about Austria.

What followed next was up to them and only they knew about it.

With the address in hand, they rented a SUV and drove out of Salzburg towards Bad Gastein. The journey took one hour and a half. The guys marveled at the beautiful scenery.

Bad Gastein was situated in the High Valley of the Hobe Tauern Mountain Range. You could see green everywhere. Hoseok declared that he could see himself live there. The others agreed wholeheartedly.

The GPS guided them through town towards the coffee shop where the pictures were taken. The owner was an old couple who refused to let them leave without tasting their coffee. They claimed it contained a secret recipe that would make sure they returned to taste it again. The group indulged them with pleasure while Namjoon conversed with the man, showing him the pictures.

“Oh, Seunghyun and Jiwon,” He exclaimed happily. “Lovely couple. They drop by almost every day on their way to work, leaving big tips every time. They love my wife’s lemon tart.”

“They’re so sweet,” The wife confessed. “How do you know them?”

“We’re friends from back home,” Yoongi replied. “We came to visit, but we were lost.”

“Do you know where they live?” Jin asked this time.

“Their house is on the other side of the waterfall,” the husband stated. “Let me write you down the address.”

The guys exchanged skeptic looks. Having reached this stage, they couldn’t help but hesitate. Were they really ready to confront the two? Were they really ready to even face them?

“There you go,” The husband came back with a piece of paper containing the address. “Send them our regards, okay?”

Namjoon shook his hand warmly and gave his wife a kiss on the cheek before he stepped out with the boys following suit. Putting the address in the GPS, it turned out that it would only take a seven minute drive.

“Pull over,” Jimin ordered midway.

“What?” Namjoon wondered, looking at him in the rearview mirror. “Is something wrong?”

“Pull over, hyung, please,” Jimin pleaded desperately.

Sensing that something was wrong, Namjoon obeyed and watched as Jimin escaped out of the car in a hurry. There was a railing facing the waterfall that Jimin leaned on, taking his head in his hands, breathing heavily.

When he sensed someone wrapping his arms around his waist, he leaned into the contact, seeking the warmth.

“You know that I’m here for you,” Yoongi whispered in his ear.

Jimin hummed, closing his eyes, still taking deep breaths.

“I promised to wait for you, give you space and time,” Yoongi continued. “But I can’t help it these days. It’s getting harder to fight against my heart, Jimin.”

“Yoongi, let’s not talk about this now, please,” Jimin begged, turning in his arms to face him.

“I can’t help it, okay?” Yoongi cupped Jimin’s cheek in his palm. “You decided for us after what happened with Jungkook and Taehyung. But, you saw the length they went to for them to stay together and protect their love.”

“Yoongi,” Jimin sighed, leaning into his touch further.

“We can make it work,” Yoongi tried to convince him. “Just let us try. We got nothing to lose.”

“We’ll talk about this when we go back home,” Jimin promised him.

Yoongi smiled and kissed him on the cheek. “I love you so much, Jimin,”

“I know,” Jimin placed his forehead against Yoongi’s and breathed him in. “I know,”

They remained in that position for a bit, till Jimin calmed down and allowed Yoongi to guide him back towards the car.

“Do you feel better now?” Hoseok opened his arms for him, wrapping Jimin in a hug instantly.

Jimin hummed, focusing on the road. Namjoon drove again, crossing over a bridge over the waterfall to the other side as the shop owner had explained. When they finally made it to the address, they couldn’t help the sighs of awe they let out as they took in the house.

It was a charming cottage set on a sunny hillside with picturesque views of the surrounding mountains. It was built in traditional style, perfect for those who wanted a property in a quiet location but still conveniently close to the mountains. Moreover, the cottage had a basement, a ground, a first floor and an attic. It also had a car park with space for two cars as well as small wooden terrace and a large garden.

“This is gorgeous,” Yoongi let out in amazement.

“Wow,” Jin had to agree.

“Shall we?” Namjoon motioned for them to get out of the car.

“Holy shit,” Hoseok sighed heavily. “Are we really doing this?”

“We didn’t fly all the way to Austria to chicken out, Hoseok,” Yoongi chuckled. “It’s now or never.”

Jimin wasn’t ready. He wasn’t ready at all. He wanted to turn around, drive back to Salzburg and take the first fight back home. He regretted coming, especially now that he was one wooden door away from the truth.

Jin was the one who knocked.

Then, they waited.

When no one answered, he tried again.

Again, no response.

“Try the doorbell,” Namjoon suggested.

Jin scoffed, berating himself for not thinking of it first, for not noticing in the first place. He was about to press it when a car suddenly stopped behind them, right next to their SUV.

“Fucking hell,” Yoongi cursed when the driver stepped out of the car.

Jimin froze next to him, eyes wide open and heart hammering fast inside his ribcage.

The driver hadn’t noticed them yet, but moved to grab the grocery from the backseat. When he did, his reaction was to drop everything to the ground.

“Holy shit!”

The boys simply stared at him, none dared to move. At least not for a few minutes. It was Jin who took the initiative, approaching Jungkook slowly, to help him out.

He crouched down and put back the grocery that fell out inside the bags. Jungkook finally unfroze and crouched down next to him to help. Jin sensed him and pursed his lips tightly to fight against his tears.

“Hyung,” Jungkook suddenly whispered.

Jin then dropped everything and hugged him, crying in his neck.

Jungkook sobbed and held onto him tight. “Hyung, I missed you. I missed you so much.”

“Shut up, you brat,” Jin chastised, but he held him tighter. “Shut up!”

Jungkook continued to sob in his arms. Then, one by one, the boys joined the hug, except Jimin, who remained by the door, watching the exchange with cold eyes.

They didn’t know how long they sat there, holding Jungkook while crying. It could be a few minutes or an hour. Hoseok stood up first, holding onto Jungkook’s wrist to pull him to his feet.

“You have a lot of explaining to do, young man,”

Jungkook picked the rest of the grocery before he ushered them inside. Jimin stepped aside to let him open the door.

Walking inside, the boys marveled at the interior the same way they did the exterior. The cottage was gorgeous. It had a spacious living room. The kitchen was an open space with a dining area. The entire place had huge windows that offered breathtaking views of the mountains from all sides.

There were paintings decorating the walls, but the guys’ eyes fell on the huge picture that was hung above the fireplace. It was one of the seven of them; they had taken it during a dinner they had gone to one night.

“Jiminie hyung,” Jungkook approached him once he placed the grocery on the kitchen counter.

Jimin remained quiet, but there was a storm raging inside of him. He refused to believe his eyes. This wasn’t Jungkook. This was just an illusion. It couldn’t be him. It was a dreadful dream. His mind was torturing him again. He would wake up and Jungkook would be gone.

Jungkook stepped closer. Jimin stood his ground.

“Hyung,”

SLAP!

The guys gasped in shock. Jimin didn’t look remorseful.

“Don’t you fucking dare come near me, asshole,” He spat angrily.

Jungkook held his cheek where the slap landed. Deep inside, he knew he deserved it.

“I’m sorry, hyung,” He whispered, looking at Jimin with tears in his eyes. “I’m so sorry,” He addressed the others as well. “We wanted to stay in touch, but we couldn’t.”

“You didn’t even say goodbye,” Jimin grabbed his collar, spitting the words in his face. “How could you do that to us? You knew you were leaving that night and you just disappeared on us.”

Jungkook didn’t fight. He allowed him to lash out on him. He couldn’t imagine what they had gone through because of him and Taehyung. But, back then, they believed they were doing the right thing. They still did. It got them where they were right now and they wouldn’t trade it for the world.

“Gukkie,” A voice suddenly called near the stairs.

All heads turned towards the source.

“Where did you go?” Taehyung walked down the stairs, rubbing the sleep out of his eyes. “I woke up to an empty bed.”

“Tae,” Jungkook approached the end of the stairs. “We have guests,”

Taehyung opened his eyes and caught sight of them. He instantly stumbled, almost falling if it weren’t for Jungkook’s quick reflex.

“Be careful, baby,”

Taehyung froze in shock. “Wow,” he then started crying.

He looked so out of it as the members hugged him one by one, listening to his incoherent string of apologies. “Fuck, you’re really here. They’re really here.” He looked back at Jungkook for confirmation, who nodded, smiling tearfully.

When it was Jimin’s turn, Taehyung froze in his steps when the man held his hand up for him to stop.

“Don’t come near me,” He ordered.

Taehyung’s face fell. “Chim,”

“Don’t call me that,” Jimin’s voice grew even colder.

Taehyung approached slowly, ignoring his protests. Jimin’s heart pounded faster.

“I’m serious, don’t come near me,”

Taehyung ignored him and before Jimin could fight, he had him wrapped into a tight hug.

“Chim,” Taehyung sobbed hard.

Jimin kept his arms to himself, closing his eyes to stop the tears. He felt the warmth of Taehyung’s body in the air. Was it really a dream? Was Taehyung really hugging him or was it just his mind’s product?

No, dreams couldn’t be this clear.

“I’m sorry,” Taehyung whispered in his ear. “I know I hurt you and I’m so sorry.” He didn’t expect Jimin or any of the boys to accept his apologies. After all, he and Jungkook had left them. They were monsters for putting them in pain for years, but when they took that decision, they were conscious that it could be the end.

“Why couldn’t you tell us?”

Taehyung heard Namjoon question and he pulled back from the hug. Jimin turned his back to him to hide his tears, but Taehyung could tell. He still could read him like open book.

“You could have contacted us and we would have kept it a secret,” Jin told them.

“Did management forbid you from contacting us?” Yoongi fired another question.

“Those are so many questions,” Jungkook smiled slightly. “We’ll answer them all in a few.” He ushered them to the living room and left to the kitchen to make them coffee. Taehyung followed him and the guys watched as they conversed in hushed tones, lost in their own world. At one point, Jungkook took Taehyung in his arms, sensing he was nervous and needed his warmth, and kissed his earlobe and temple.

So, nothing had changed.

The guys exchanged knowing looks, smiling gently at the scene.

Those two were still very much in love and each other’s support system.

-=oOo=-

What really happened and how?

Flashback to seven years ago

Jungkook admitted that he wasn’t terribly perceptive most of the time, but when it came to Taehyung, he was more than that.

He could read his lover like an open book; could tell when he was sleepy, hungry or annoyed; when he needed an encouraging speech or simply a cuddle.

It was all in those little cues and the fact that he had known the man for almost ten years and loved him for half of it.

So, when he walked into the living room and spotted Taehyung on the couch, absent-mindedly petting Yeontan, he knew something was wrong.

With unfocused eyes and a slack face, Jungkook had only seen Taehyung like this once before; when his grandma died.

He sat down next to him on the couch, sarcastic comment at the ready about being a lazy-ass, when he noticed the tear stains streaked across Taehyung's face. So Jungkook did the only thing he knew to do: slung his arm around Taehyung as fresh tears dripped down his face. Two hours later and Taehyung didn't seem any closer to moving, let alone talking, so Jungkook just laid him in bed, sat with him till he fell asleep at 3 am, then did it all over again the next day. Taehyung never really said anything, and as freaked out as Jungkook was, he at least knew asking about it was a really dumb idea. But Taehyung came back around, eventually, with a whispered "thank you."

And Jungkook really should have picked up that Taehyung was spiraling down towards this place, this dark, unfathomable space, before Sejin had asked him to look in on Taehyung. The clues were all there - the silence, the shuttering of emotion, the slow, random amble back to their room. Now that Jungkook was facing an unreachable Taehyung once more, he was past freaked out and headlong into panic.

Sitting with Taehyung for hours till he crawled his way back wasn't the problem - it was figuring out just what the problem was so he could actually do something for Taehyung. It just didn't sit right with Jungkook that there was probably something, anything, that he could do to help Taehyung, but he didn't know what the hell it was.

Two strides over, and Jungkook was kneeling in front of Taehyung's glazed eyes, "Baby, I'm here,”

Taehyung blinked and turned towards him. “Guk,”

“Yes, my love,”

“I’m tired, Guk,” Taehyung confessed, looking ready to cry. “I need a break. I can’t, Guk, I can’t.”

"I know, darling, I know." Jungkook's voice was raspier. “I’ll ask management for a short break. This can’t go on. We all need to rest.”

He was determined to shower Taehyung with love until he recovered. He had faith that things would get better.

-=oOo=-

When management announced that they would go on a two month hiatus, Jungkook couldn’t believe his ears. It was their first since they debuted. It was too good to be true.

The group members rejoiced, sitting down to decide on what to do during this break. It would be the first time they would be on their own, not relying on their managers to schedule their day-to-day activities.

They loved it.

First thing first, Jungkook planned to go back to Busan to see his brother. It had been a few months since they last saw each other. Jungkook wished he could say the same about his parents, but alas it wasn’t possible anymore. They had denounced him as their son when he came out to them. It hurt hard, but Jungkook learned to live with it. He thanked the God that he still had his brother who supported him endlessly and cheered on him and Taehyung, wishing for their happiness.

Taehyung decided to go to Daegu to see his own family before joining his actor friends on a trip to Jeju. Jungkook tagged along before the two went back to Busan to celebrate his birthday with his brother.

The first few weeks felt like a dream. Jungkook was rejuvenated, as if he were being reborn, especially after seeing Taehyung being himself and smiling more again. The trip to Jeju was also so much fun. Jungkook stayed in the dark, never posing with the guys in the pictures Taehyung shared on their twitter. He couldn’t imagine the meltdown Army would experience if they found out he was there as well.

When his birthday arrived, Taehyung and his brother threw him a party in his favorite restaurant in Busan. Jeonghyun gave him a new laptop that he mentioned in brief that he wanted and Taehyung gifted him an entire photography set.

Jungkook was over the moon.

He couldn’t ask for more.

-=oOo=-

He had no idea it would go downhill from then on.

-=oOo=-

A few days later found the couple walking around Busan under disguise. It was their last day before they left to Japan. They planned to travel the world, visiting some countries they had performed in before and intended to go back when they had the chance.

“Oh, ice cream,” Taehyung exclaimed enthusiastically.

Jungkook cooed at his reaction. Always a kid at heart. “I’ll go get us some.”

“And I’ll wait here,” Taehyung decided.

“Chocolate chip with caramel sauce and whipped cream on top, right?” Jungkook recited perfectly.

Taehyung’s eyes softened. “I love you, baby.  You know me so well.”

Jungkook winked and left to get their ice-cream. The shop wasn’t full, so he didn’t take long. He frowned in confusion when Taehyung wasn’t standing where he left him.

“Tae?” He called out, looking in all directions. “Tae,” No response. “What the fuck!” He started to get worried. “TAEHYUNG!” He threw the cones and pulled his phone out of his pocket. This wasn’t normal. Taehyung wouldn’t go anywhere without letting him know. The phone rang till he was directed to voicemail. He tried for four times before he started to lose it.

Looking around again, he spotted a camera above the shop’s entrance, so he rushed inside, an idea in mind.

The shop owner was kind enough to let him see the footage. When he saw what happened, it felt like his entire world was collapsing.

“Oh my God,”

Taehyung was kidnapped. He was grabbed by two guys and pulled into a black minivan. Jungkook started shaking as he fumbled with his phone to call the label followed by the guys.

He didn’t remember much afterwards. It was all a blur.

The police might have arrived and seen the footage. They might have managed to get the number of the van’s plate. They might have spread it across Busan. They might have taken two hours or so to locate Taehyung. Jungkook might have sobbed like crazy when he saw his boyfriend being carried by paramedics out of the warehouse.

Who knew.

Maybe it all had happened.

Jungkook only came to be when they reached the hospital.

He remembered he felt a tightening in his chest as he sat in the waiting room, like all the oxygen was being slowly sucked away. He opened his mouth slightly and took a deep breath. He was numb with despair and his eyes were bloodshed from all the crying he had been through since Taehyung was kidnapped until he was rescued. But Jungkook had other issues on his mind; like how he wasn’t going to survive if something happened to Taehyung.

A few hours later, the doctor came out of the room with a gentle smile on his lips.

“How is he?” Jungkook asked hurriedly.

“He’ll survive.” The doctor said.

Jungkook wasn’t ready for the elaboration.

“He has two fractured ribs and a concussion,” The doctor explained. “and he had gone through a severe panic attack. We had to sedate him to make him sleep.”

Jungkook winced. “What will happen when he wakes up?”

The doctor pursed his lips tightly. “I’m afraid we’ll face another episode like this one. He had been through traumatic events. We need to be careful around him.”

Jungkook was ready to bawl his eyes out again. “They didn’t touch him…you know, inappropriately or something?”

“If you mean rape him, then no,” The doctor denied. “But they had traumatized him while beating him. He couldn’t stop crying or shaking. He didn’t even allow us to touch him. He kept calling for you.”

“I need to see him,” Jungkook requested.

“He’s sleeping now, but you can stay by his side,” The doctor allowed him. “When he wakes up, call us. We’ll be right there, making sure he doesn’t have another panic attack.”

Jungkook nodded and watched him leave. He then walked inside.

His heart dropped when his eyes fell on Taehyung. He rushed to his side and touched his cheek gently. There was no response as Taehyung was sleeping, but at least Jungkook could see blood flooding his cheeks. Earlier, Taehyung looked like someone had sucked all the blood from his body, so Jungkook was relieved to see his face finally gaining some color.

His heart squeezed tightly in his ribcage and tears invaded his eyes once again as he sat next to his lover.

“Don’t leave me, Taehyung. I won’t survive without you.” He whispered.

-=oOo=-

“I’m here now, okay?” Yoongi wrapped Jungkook in a tight hug. He was the first one to arrive to Busan, rushing to the hospital, looking and feeling frantic.

The rest of the guys were abroad, but they kept calling to check on them, promising to be there as soon as possible.

“Thanks, hyung,” Jungkook wiped a small tear from the corner of his eye.

“How is he?” Yoongi inquired.

“Still sleeping,” Jungkook answered. “He hasn’t woken up properly yet.”

“He’ll be fine, Guk.” Yoongi reassured. “We’ll shower him with affection. We’ll be there for him. He’ll survive. He’s a fighter.”

“I hope so, hyung. I surely hope so.” Jungkook prayed and closed his eyes when Yoongi hugged him.

His heart was hurt and he needed that moment to clear his thoughts before he went back to Taehyung.

Taehyung.

Never once had Jungkook thought that he would cry his heart out, feeling scared to lose someone. When did his heart leave and Taehyung take its place? When did Taehyung manage to be his everything, even the air that he breathed? He knew that he was in love with the man, but he had never thought that he loved him tremendously.

Now that Taehyung was lying injured and traumatized, Jungkook came to realize that life was meaningless without him. He was also scared that Taehyung would have a relapse; fall into depression again. No, he’ll be fine. I won’t leave him even for a second. We’ll make it together just like we did in the past. Yes, he’ll be fine. Jungkook thought determinably and excused himself to go check on Taehyung. His heart hurt for the umpteenth time that day when he took in Taehyung’s sleeping form. He slowly made his way to Taehyung’s bed and he sat on the edge.

“Taehyung,” He whispered. “Please be okay, my love.” He held Taehyung’s warm hand in his. “Please, be okay.”

After a minute or so, Jungkook slid under the cover with Taehyung. He started to stroke Taehyung’s soft cheek as his eyes swam with tears again.

“Seeing you like this is breaking my heart.” Jungkook whispered as tears rolled down his cheeks.

He softly brushed Taehyung’s hair and covered him up while tears made his face wet. He stared at Taehyung for so long, admiring the once smiling face, now covered with bruises on his cheeks and jaw. “I didn’t know I loved you this much. I didn’t know seeing you hurt would hit so close to my heart if not my entire heart.” Jungkook said and let out a soft sob.

Suddenly Taehyung moved and started whimpering softly. Jungkook blinked away the tears and sat up straight.

“Taehyung… I’m here, baby. I’m here with you.” He whispered as he put his cheek next to Taehyung’s and stroked his other cheek.

Taehyung stopped whimpering and turned into Jungkook’s touch. Jungkook was surprised that Taehyung responded to him. He left his hand on his lover’s face and whispered in his ear. “You’ll be okay. I won’t leave you. I love you so much.” He uttered, still caressing his cheek.

Taehyung didn’t respond and Jungkook’s shoulders slumped in defeat. He removed his hand and looked away. He slowly hugged his knees tightly and started rocking himself back and forth for so long while glancing at Taehyung every now and then.

-=oOo=-

Taehyung had another severe panic attack.

By then, the group members had made it back to Korea, so they were there to witness Taehyung fighting the doctor and nurses, shouting at them not to touch him.

Jungkook broke down in the hallway, listening to his boyfriend going hysteric.

It was his fault, he believed.

The investigation was over and the kidnappers turned out to be two girls who were Jungkook’s sasaengs. They hired the two guys who grabbed Taehyung for help. They wanted to hurt Taehyung to warn him against getting close to Jungkook, trying to turn him gay.

That was the last straw for Jungkook.

He felt repulsed by everything; the fans, the fame, the money.

All he could think about was the fact that the man he loved the most in the world was hurt because of him.

-=oOo=-

Jungkook woke up with a start.

He bolted up, breathing heavily, disoriented despite the fact that he was in his own bed, in his own house. He stared up at the ceiling, his eyes tracing the familiar lines, finding them strangely calming. The house was silent but for a few residual creaks; he relaxed a little, knowing that all was fine.

He rolled over so he could reach the nightstand, grabbing his phone, checking his messages, hoping that he might find something there.

Nothing.

It wasn’t that he was usually bombarded with messages; the guys were pretty much the only ones who contacted him on almost a daily basis. His brother contacted him every now and then. Still, he was looking forward to someone else contacting him.

It had been far too long since he heard Taehyung’s voice.

Much to his surprise, he totally understood Taehyung’s behavior.

It was only natural that Taehyung would stay away from him after leaving the hospital. Jungkook deserved it. It was his fault that Taehyung was hurt. He decided to give him space, but now he was getting worried. It had been three weeks since the last time he had seen the other man. He was so tempted to leave Seoul to Daegu and just watch him from afar because he missed him so much, but then he remembered why Taehyung wanted him away in the first place.

The temporary break up wasn’t about him anymore. It wasn’t about his feelings. It was about Taehyung’s well-being. For once, Jungkook decided to act selfless and as much as it pained him, he just knew it was for the best.

He did miss Taehyung though.

The days and weeks ahead bled into each other, long and sluggish. He drowned himself in photography, venturing out every night to take pictures. For once, Taehyung wasn’t everything on his mind. He focused more on his hobby and felt satisfied with himself in what seemed like forever.

Closing his eyes lazily, he decided to go back to sleep since it was still early to leave to work. However, just as he slid under the covers again, he heard the main door slam open.

That meant only one thing.

He jumped out of the bed and rushed outside. He froze the moment his eyes fell on Taehyung. This latter, closed the door behind him, a bag in hand, before he turned towards him. He looked taken aback when he spotted him. “Hey,” He started.

“Hey,” Jungkook whispered back.

His stomach had done an incredulous swallow dive and was somewhere down at his knees, his heart thumping an insane metronome against his ribcage. Jungkook’s eyes devoured Taehyung’s form, from his gorgeous orbs, his delicious mouth to his neck, followed by his hands and legs, before he looked back up to stare at his face again. “God, I missed you so bad,” he said before he could stop the words.

Taehyung pursed his lips tightly together at the statement. He kept his face carefully inscrutable, although his own heart was leaping erratically like a dancer with no sense of rhythm. He continued to gaze at Jungkook, trying to ignore the crashing tidal wave of memories that assaulted him at that moment. He was about to say something when his phone chose that moment to interrupt.

“Yes? Yes. I made it home, mom. I’m okay,” He walked past Jungkook towards their bedroom.

Jungkook followed him like a lost puppy, feeling deep anguish at having the man he loved more than anything close yet so far. He found him standing in the middle of the room, call already finished, waiting expectantly for him.

“How do you feel?” Jungkook could see that the bruises had faded, but Taehyung looked tired. It wasn’t like he expected the last few weeks to have worked wonders on him; not that fast, but his heart ached to see his love looking dead on his feet.

“I had become paranoid, Jungkook,” Taehyung admitted, eyes screaming anguish. “I flinch whenever I sense movement around me. I flinch whenever someone touches me. I had driven my parents uncomfortable. They don’t know how to act around me anymore. I couldn’t stay there any longer.”

Jungkook hesitated as he approached him. “What about me? Will you flinch if I try to hug you?”

“I don’t know,” Taehyung confessed, looking ready to cry.

In a flash, Jungkook rushed and hugged Taehyung tightly. Cradling the other man possessively in his arms, Jungkook brushed his lips tenderly across the length of Taehyung’s neck, down to the slender curve of his bony shoulder. Taehyung let out a faint sound, a cross between a sob and a sigh as he clutched at Jungkook tightly, not wanting to let go, not daring to let go, because he was afraid that Jungkook would suddenly vanish, and then Taehyung’s world would crumble once again.

“I was so worried about you,” Jungkook murmured, his voice quivering like a leaf. “I respected your decision to stay with your parents for a while, but I died slowly inside without you.”

Taehyung sighed in his shoulder. “They really fucked me up, Guk. I was already struggling, but with your help and the break, things had started to become better. Now, I’m back to square one, even worse than before.”

“What happened wasn’t easy,” Jungkook admitted. “But you’re a fighter. You can survive anything.”

Taehyung chocked and pulled away so that he could look at Jungkook. “I don’t think I will. I keep having one panic attack after another whenever someone breathes next to me.” He let out a hollow, dry laugh. “I’m ruined. I don’t think I’ll ever recover…” he paused, tucking a finger under Jungkook’s chin. “I’ll never be able to perform on stage again. I can’t face the fans. I can’t even picture looking at them, smiling at them as if nothing happened.”

Taehyung’s words had detonated an emotion landmine in Jungkook and he had a sensation of a tightly coiled spring letting go violently and bouncing undone in his chest. He bit his bottom lip, struggling to quell unstoppable tears as he felt the emotions that he had been holding on so tightly pouring out like a waterfall.

-=oOo=-

Things got worse.

Taehyung kept to himself even more than before. Jungkook stuck to his side, ready to give him the world, but what he saw as support, Taehyung saw as being overbearing.

Jungkook flinched as if slapped when Taehyung told him that he felt like he was suffocating him; that he needed space, that he wanted to be by himself for a while.

“So, my love for you now is suffocating you,” He whispered, voice thick with pain.

Taehyung groaned. “It’s not about you, Jungkook,”

Jungkook flinched harder. He called him Jungkook. Not Guk or Gukkie. Jungkook. “It is when you’re pushing me away when I want nothing than be there for you,”

“I appreciate it, Jungkook, but I need you to back off for a bit,” Taehyung pleaded desperately. “I don’t want to hurt you because I know that I will sooner or later, whether with my words or actions. Please, just give me space.”

Jungkook pursed his lips tightly, feeling his heart squeeze tight inside his ribcage. “Fine, Taehyung, have it your way. I’ll sleep at the dorm for a few days.” He was quick to disappear into their bedroom to pack a small bag.

He still held hope that Taehyung would stop him, but when he didn’t, he felt his heart crack that night.

The next day they ignored each other altogether. They had a meeting at the label and sat far away from each other. The guys picked up on the tension hanging above their heads, but they decided not to intervene. They were familiar with the couple’s fights and learned from experience that they could handle whatever happened on their own. They believed in them and that they would overcome anything.

It was hard for Jungkook to keep his distance. He ached to be close to Taehyung, he itched to touch him, kiss him; just feel him. They hadn’t spent a day without each other since they got together. It was so damn hard.

“I can’t do it,” Jungkook whispered to himself and went searching for his boyfriend.

He found him in the hallway with Sejin.

“I want to quit,”

He heard the moment he was about to step out. He froze, feeling his heart drop to the ground. He couldn’t move, so he continued to eavesdrop.

“It’s a huge decision,” Sejin commented.

“That I’m not taking,” Taehyung replied.

Jungkook couldn’t see him, but he could tell how tired his boyfriend was.

“I want to quit, not that I’m going to,” Taehyung elaborated.

“What’s stopping you?” Sejin inquired.

“I can’t do it,” Taehyung stated. “And I hate myself for it because I’m not happy anymore. I don’t know why I’m doing this anymore. I just want to be happy again.”

Jungkook’s heart squeezed in his ribcage and he closed his eyes in pain. He couldn’t imagine what Taehyung was going through. He could only guess and he wished there was a way he could, he wished Taehyung let him in to try.

Why he never told me he wanted to quit? Doesn’t he trust me?

It hurt to be honest; to be kept in the dark about something this important.

They needed to talk, whether Taehyung wanted it or not.

When he walked inside their house later that night, Taehyung didn’t react. Jungkook found him sitting in the living room on one of the couches, his feet dangling off the side. He looked dazed and far too pale for Jungkook’s liking, and his eyes didn’t exactly focused when he turned to see him coming in, but his lips did curve into a small smile when Jungkook crossed the room. “You couldn’t stay away, huh?”

Jungkook’s gut twisted as he sat next to Taehyung. “I heard you earlier when you were talking to Sejin hyung. Why the hell him and not me, Taehyung? You don’t trust me anymore?”

Taehyung caught his bottom lip between his teeth and looked at him for a minute with wide eyes. His pupils were dilated too far for the light in the room and he looked almost child-like as he blinked at Jungkook. “I’m depressed, Guk.”

“I gathered that by myself,” Jungkook retorted.

“So, you should know that I just don’t care about anything anymore. I genuinely lost interest in everything.” Taehyung sighed loudly, closing his eyes.

“Even me?” Jungkook whispered feebly.

Taehyung looked at him in shock. “Are you crazy? You’re the only thing keeping me sane.”

“Then, why did you push me away?” Jungkook argued. It still hurt.

“Because I don’t deserve your love,” Taehyung finally admitted. “I don’t deserve to have you. You deserve better, Jungkook.”

“What the fuck are you talking about?” Jungkook flipped out, hating what he heard, what he saw. “You are the best thing that had ever happened to me. I’m the one who doesn’t deserve someone like you.”

“I don’t believe so, Guk. I don’t feel like I deserve any happiness. I don’t belong here anymore. I want to quit, go away. I don’t want to be an idol anymore.” Taehyung let it all out.

“Okay. Okay,” Jungkook whispered. “You want to quit, then we’ll quit.”

“NO!” Taehyung shouted in exasperation. “This is why I didn’t tell you. I knew you would say this.”

“What were you expecting me to say?” Jungkook scoffed angrily. “That I’d congratulate you and send you off somewhere?”

“I won’t allow you to quit something you love to do more than anything in the world, let alone for me.” Taehyung argued.

“I love you more than being an idol,” Jungkook fought back. “I’m ready to give up everything for you. That’s not your decision to make, do you hear me?” His voice was cold, eyes blazing with heat.

Taehyung fell silent.

“You should know better than to think I’d choose my career over you,” Jungkook tugged Taehyung in to rest his head on his shoulder, feeling the anger slip out of him now that he had spoken his mind.

“Jungkook,” Taehyung nuzzled at his neck. “I’m sorry,”

“For what?”

“Not being honest with you about my illness and for not telling you about wanting to quit,” Taehyung explained.

“I understand,” Jungkook kissed his hair.

“I didn’t want to face that I was slipping away,” Taehyung admitted, wrapping his arms around Jungkook’s waist to hold him properly. “I wanted to cling to the thought that I was just feeling under pressure, but I can’t do it anymore. I’m depressed, Jungkook, and I need to be treated.”

“You will,” Jungkook held him back, squeezing him tightly against his chest. “You’ll go to see a therapist. I’ll go with you. We’ll do this together.”

“What if it doesn’t work out?” Taehyung tilted his head up to look at him.

“We should try,” Jungkook prompted, kissing his eyelids this time followed by his nose. “If it doesn’t, then we’ll think of another solution. And if you want to quit, then we’ll quit.”

Taehyung sighed heavily. “It would have been so damn easier if you didn’t love me this much.”

He didn’t mean to offend Jungkook and this latter didn’t see it as such. “Too bad for you, I love you like crazy and I’ll give up everything for you.”

Taehyung cracked a smile. “Come here, you sap,” He pouted his lips, asking for a kiss that Jungkook was more than happy to give.

They exchanged soft pecks for a while, breathing each other in, finding solace in being in each other’s arms.

“Let’s not tell the guys,” Taehyung requested, leaning back, pulling Jungkook along to settle between his open legs. “I don’t want them to worry and start breathing down my neck. Let’s just tell Sejin hyung.”

Jungkook hummed against his neck, leaving a trail of kisses there. “You smell so good,”

“Did you miss me?” Taehyung closed his eyes at the ministrations.

“More than you can imagine,” Jungkook replied, moving his kiss to Taehyung’s collarbone.

Taehyung moaned when Jungkook nipped at a sensitive spot. “Take me to the bedroom.”

Jungkook had never moved faster.

-=oOo=-

Taehyung’s therapist was a nice middle aged man that Jungkook liked instantly. He had a warm smile and soothing voice and judged by Taehyung’s behavior after every session, he concluded that the man knew what he was doing. As in Taehyung smiling more, taking him out often and initiating intimacy again. When Dr. Lee, the therapist, found out about the true nature of their relationship, he allowed Jungkook to start attending the sessions instead of waiting for Taehyung outside. Something about Taehyung feeling more comfortable to have his lover around.

It was hard at first to listen to his boyfriend as he poured out his feelings and dark thoughts. He could only watch and hold his hand while the therapist took notes and asked questions here and there.

“What’s happiness to you?” Dr. Lee asked one day.

“Jungkook,” Taehyung replied instantly.

Jungkook felt his heart somersault in delight, fill with adoration.

“I mean besides Jungkook,” Dr. Lee sent him a knowing look, smiling gently.

“I don’t know,” Taehyung let out, looking at him for help.

“He used to love to paint,” Jungkook provided, holding onto Taehyung’s hand. “Why did you stop?”

“Our schedules can get very hectic at times,” Taehyung replied, his eyes still on Jungkook. “We don’t have the time to sleep let alone pick up hobbies.”

“How did you feel whenever you painted?” Dr. Lee insisted, jotting down nonstop.

“Content,” Taehyung said. “I felt that I was doing something right.”

Dr. Lee and Jungkook shared another look.

“Then, you know what your next assignment is,” Dr. Lee muttered excitedly.

Jungkook was more than happy to help transform one of the guest rooms in their house to a studio. He was also the one who helped Taehyung choose his painting material online. When Taehyung began working on his first canvas, Jungkook had tears in his eyes. It was nothing special; just some doodles, but it was progress.

Jungkook discovered his own passion along. It started with him filming Taehyung while he painted and full blew into him making GCVs. He kept those he made about Taehyung to himself though, only shared those featuring all the hyungs.

-=oOo=-

“Where do you see yourself in ten years?” Dr. Lee asked during a session.

Taehyung contemplated his answer, looking at Jungkook, as if searching for the answer in his eyes. “Not an idol. Living in a beautiful cottage somewhere in Europe, surrounded by nature from all sides. Teaching kindergarten children how to draw. They’d make a mess, but I wouldn’t mind.” He chuckled lightly.

Jungkook’s heart warmed to see him speak so gently of his dream.

“What would Jungkook be working at?”

“I guess doing some freelance photography,” Taehyung replied. “He can open his own studio. Maybe near the school where I work, so that he would drop me off every day. My own personal driver, you know?” He winked at his boyfriend.

The fact that Taehyung hadn’t hesitated even for a second to reply floored Jungkook, made him feel a fire light ablaze inside his veins. Taehyung envisioned his future ten years ahead and Jungkook was in it; he was still there. Taehyung wanted him there, even suggested a career path for him.

Fuck!

He was blown away and felt that he was falling in love with him all over again.

-=oOo=-

Jungkook awoke to the tiny sound of someone humming a soft song. He kept the smile off his face and kept his eyes shut.

“Nice try,” a deep voice mumbled close to him, scratchy and teasing. “I know you’re awake.”

“How do you always know?” Jungkook half-whined, opening his eyes to Taehyung sitting in front of the bed a few inches away, facing what looked to Jungkook like an easel and  a small table that contained what looked like painting supplies-brushes, ink basins and pencils. “What are you doing?”

“I’m painting your portrait because you’re so beautiful.” Taehyung stated plainly. He smiled as Jungkook gaped.

He didn’t have any reason to doubt Taehyung’s honesty. This was the man who had spent the last six years making him feel beautiful, loved and able to conquer the world. This was the man he trusted with his heart and life. This was Taehyung the artist who wanted to paint him…him.

“Okay,” he whispered at last. “Paint me like one of your French girls.”

Taehyung cracked up. “Wow,”

“It’s a line I’ve always wanted to use,” Jungkook admitted. “Winslet got nothing on me.”

Taehyung smiled and crawled on the bed to lean in, pressing an expert kiss to Jungkook’s pliant lips. Jungkook inhaled quickly, felt Taehyung’s mouth covering his, and pressed back with his own, feeling himself slightly unravel. His eyes fluttered shut again. Taehyung’s mouth was hot against his own. Jungkook barely had time to open his own mouth, turn his head, and take Taehyung’s wet lower lip between his teeth hungrily before Taehyung was pulling back abruptly. Their lips made a faint, popping noise of suction as they suddenly parted.

Taehyung got off the bed and Jungkook protested at the loss, but he still couldn’t make any proper words. His head was still swimming because of that kiss, so passionate, so fitting.

Now Taehyung was moving around the room quickly, dressed in his dark silk pajamas, looking around for things. He picked up an eight-inch canvas from against the wall, and then he brought it back to his easel. Haphazardly he scooped up two pencils from the table nearby, and then sat down on the stool, facing the easel.

Jungkook sat up attentively. Apparently the actual painting was going to begin, or something. Taehyung had his hands resting against his thighs, his arms flexed, his shoulders lazily drooped forward. The attractive brunet seemed so comfortable in his seat.

Jungkook looked intimidated all of a sudden. “Taehyung, I’m still naked under the sheets.”

“I know,” Taehyung said, staring at Jungkook with lens-like precision as Jungkook adjusted himself on the bed. “I’d love to paint you with just the covers on your crotch. Will it be okay?”

Jungkook flushed even harder but he nodded, his fingertips subconsciously trailing his naked torso. “I think it’s fine.” He said and lay on his side, adjusting the bed duvet on his body, baring everything naked but his crotch. “Like this?” Jungkook asked in an innocent voice.

Taehyung swallowed. His eyes surveyed Jungkook’s chest, ribs, waistline, and legs. “It’s perfect. Keep this position and don’t look away from me.”

Jungkook looked up at Taehyung as he took orders, wondering how this whole new experience seemed too sensual for him. He stared at Taehyung’s lips. Taehyung wasn’t making eye contact with him, and was instead making eye contact with Jungkook’s body. He was molding the sharp angles of the body so the he could easily capture it.

“Put your right arm up, over your head,” Taehyung said, watching as Jungkook did his bidding. Jungkook placed his limbs the way Taehyung wanted them with as much grace as he could manage. “Put your other arm in your lap, on your inner thigh.” Jungkook’s hand touched his own leg, fingers running back and forth over the fabric of the sheet. “Perfect!” Taehyung beamed and took the pencil in his hands. He brought his hand to the canvas and started making a few elementary strokes with the pencil, eyes flitting over to Jungkook every few seconds, just making the basin outlines of the man and his body.

Jungkook swallowed. “God, you look so hot.”

Taehyung smiled, gazing at Jungkook for much longer than he needed to, but didn’t respond. For the next several, quiet minutes, he got to work, and fast. His arm flexed as he quickly stretched in Jungkook’s figure with dark, present lead, on white. As he shaded limbs and curves, stretched in hair and lashes, copied Jungkook’s legs, pointed his feet and emphasizing the baby smoothness of his bare skin.

“How is it coming?” Jungkook asked after a while, his faint voice chafing against Taehyung’s silent, diligent focus. He hadn’t stopped watching Taehyung since he had started. He hadn’t expected it to be this quiet, and he hadn’t expected it to be this arousing. He was getting hard by just watching Taehyung paint him naked.

“You’re amazing,” Taehyung answered, never taking his eyes away from the canvas.

Jungkook felt his stomach do that flipping thing again. He was so anxious to see how Taehyung perceived him; he just wanted to see the finished result. Taehyung glanced at him once more, and Jungkook both felt like caving in on himself and breaking his stiff position to scoop up that artist across the way in a passionate, grateful kiss.

He didn’t know what he had done to deserve someone like Taehyung, but he was grateful for whatever it was. Maybe it was just for simply existing.

It had been almost an hour. Jungkook watched as Taehyung switched to a different, lighter pencil at last, probably adding in the finishing details. “Done,” he muttered.

Jungkook stood up accordingly, taking the bed sheet with him to still cover his crotch, and walked over to Taehyung’s stool, to the other side of the canvas. His eyes widened and his mouth fell slightly open at what he saw.

It was so sharp, so realistic. It looked exactly like him, but in pencil, in grayscale. Taehyung had only drawn a portion of the bed, but Jungkook’s body was detailed to the tee. It was like looking in a mirror, but seeing a version much more refined than the reality. It was like Jungkook was seeing himself through someone else’s eyes, without as many flaws, without as many insecurities. He looked so beautiful.

“You really, really love me,” Jungkook whispered more to himself than to Taehyung.

“I do,” Taehyung answered calmly.

And then Jungkook was suddenly kissing him with passion, and Taehyung was dropping the pencils to the ground, using his hands to grip Jungkook by his back.

As their tongues wrestled with each other, as Jungkook’s breath began to pant, Jungkook dropped the sheet and straddled Taehyung’s lap on the stool, wrapping his legs around his artist’s waist. Taehyung took Jungkook in, hoisted him up, and held onto his ass, squeezing the plaint skin in his hands. Jungkook groaned into Taehyung’s mouth in response, arching his back and pressing their chests together. Taehyung’s arms wrapped even tighter around him, grasping skin for purchase, and Taehyung’s mouth untangled from his, going to bite his earlobe and desperately suck the skin of his neck.

“Please, Taehyung,” Jungkook pleaded and closed his eyes, drowning in pleasure.

“What do you need, my love?” Taehyung whispered hoarsely.

“I need you, I need to feel you so bad,” Jungkook begged. “Please, Taehyung. I want to feel you inside me.”

Self-restraint or not, Taehyung was only a man. His resistance crumbled and he crushed Jungkook against him, kissing him for all he was worth before he stood up to place him on the bed. He laid on top, Jungkook’s legs instantly rose to wrap around his waist.

“Are you sure?” Taehyung asked one last time.

Jungkook cupped the back of Taehyung’s head and dragged him down for another kiss in reply; set about making the most of the day to have Taehyung fall apart in his arms.

-=oOo=-

Talking about the kidnap was hard.

Taehyung refused to talk at first. Dr. Lee asked him brief questions that Taehyung answered as briefly. It was four sessions later that Taehyung finally let it all out.

“They held me down and called me disgusting,” He started, avoiding Jungkook’s intense gaze. “They called me a faggot. They said I was sick and needed to stay away from Jungkook so that I don’t make him gay like me. The guys beat me up whenever I struggled or tried to escape from their grasps. I never felt that helpless in my life.”

“You couldn’t do anything about it,” Dr. Lee comforted him. “You were kidnapped and held hostage. Those men were stronger than you. It wasn’t your fault.”

“It’s mine,” Jungkook let out bitterly, looking away.

“Jungkook, stop it,” Taehyung chastised. “How many times do I have to tell you that it’s not?”

Dr. Lee watched the exchange intensely, taking notes.

“I’ll never stop feeling guilty,” Jungkook countered. “I failed to protect you after promising you countlessly that I would.”

“I’m not a child who needs protection,” Taehyung’s eyes furrowed.

“I know you can do by yourself, but you’re the man I love and I feel it my duty to protect you,” Jungkook countered again.

“What is about you both quitting that you mentioned before?” Dr. Lee interrupted before things went overboard.

“We’re not anymore,” Taehyung denied.

“We still are,” Jungkook argued. “No, Tae,” He said when Taehyung tried to interrupt. “We won’t do it anymore,” He stated. “You think what happened to you didn’t involve me? Those were my fucking so called fans, trying to save me from you, keep me away so that your gayness doesn’t rub off of me.” He scoffed bitterly. “Do you think I can stand on stage, stare at the fans, knowing that some of them hate you whenever you come close to me, that some may have thought of hurting you, may even try to in the future? Do you think I can look at them in the eyes, knowing all of this? I’m so fucking done, Taehyung.”

“What do you mean?” Dr Lee asked.

“It means we’ll both quit and go somewhere to start over, somewhere no one would ever find us,” Jungkook explained. “We hadn’t told management yet, but we plan to once we finish preparing for our next comeback,” Jungkook explained. “We’re under contracts that we can’t breach. We have to record this album, shoot for the MVs, etc.”

“What about performing?” Dr. Lee glanced at Taehyung. “Are you going to be able to do it?”

Taehyung shook his head. “I can record and shoot my parts, but I don’t think I’m ready to perform live.”

Jungkook added. “We’ll talk to management then and figure out something together.”

Taehyung looked guilty. “I’m ruining everything. I’m breaking the group. I hate myself.”

Jungkook moved to hold his hand, but Taehyung brushed him off. Jungkook winced, but didn’t press it. He began to get used to Taehyung’s mood swings. One minute, he was cold, refusing to come close to an inch of his life. Another, he was all over him, seeking his warmth and support.

Jungkook went straight to the bathroom when they went back and started filling the tub. When the water was running nice and hot, he walked back to the bedroom.

“Tae,” He sat on the edge of the mattress, tugging at Taehyung’s shoulder a little.

“Please, Jungkook,” Taehyung sounded so tired and pathetic.

Jungkook batted his hands away and started unbuttoning his shirt.

“What?” Taehyung struggled into a sitting position, tried to pull away, but Jungkook followed, insistent. “I’m not in the mood, Jungkook.” He said and the use of his full name twice made Jungkook cringe.

“We’re not going to have sex,” Jungkook stopped, fighting against taking offence again and picking a fight. “I’m filling the tub for you.”

“What for?” Taehyung asked, not looking at him.

“A bath, Tae,” Jungkook replied as gently as he could. “We had practice earlier and then went straight to the therapist. I bet your back is killing you.” He paused, waited for Taehyung to say something, anything. Taehyung didn’t. “Come on, get up.”

Taehyung did, slowly, and just stood there as Jungkook shucked off Taehyung’s clothes.

“Come on,” Jungkook uttered. It was like talking to a child, a little, even though it was more as if Taehyung wasn’t with him in that instant, his mind a thousand miles away and was letting his body do what it was told without attention.

“I didn’t put any bubbles in, but I can if you want,”

Shaking his head, Taehyung just followed and stepped into the tub, leaning back and closing his eyes almost immediately.

“Let me wash your hair,” Jungkook said as he slid behind Taehyung.

This latter let him, chin dropping a little, as close to an agreement as Jungkook would get.

Jungkook’s movements were slow and deliberate as he touched Taehyung. His chest felt full and tight, touching Taehyung in this way, Taehyung silent and quiescent for him, it felt more intimate than any other act they had shared. His fingertips massaged Taehyung’s scalp, long after the shampoo has been worked into a lather, and his hands slipped under wet curls after clean water has cleared out all the soap. He could feel some of the tension, not all, seep out of Taehyung as he worked. He didn’t talk, let his touch communicate everything he couldn’t say, everything Taehyung didn’t want to hear now. 

Jungkook stayed sitting behind him in the tub, little touches against Taehyung’s shoulders and neck. He waited until the water started to cool, offering Taehyung his presence, and then retrieved a towel from the linen closet. 

Taehyung took the towel, wrapped it around his hips as he stepped out of the tub. Jungkook hovered close, one hand almost touching Taehyung’s elbow, just in case. 

Taehyung didn't say anything but he looked—not exactly better, but less as if he was about to shatter. It might have something to do with the hot water, the relaxation and quiet; Jungkook hoped it has something to do with him still being here, helping as best he could.

"Hungry?" Jungkook asked. He already knew Taehyung's answer before Taehyung shook his head, not saying anything. "I’ll order something for us when you feel like it. We were so busy we hadn’t gone out to shop for grocery in ages.”

He was trying for a light tone, the lightest he could manage when he was so worried. Taehyung gave him a look out of the corner of one eye; it was a relief to see Taehyung react to something. 

"Not hungry," Taehyung said, and Jungkook immediately started to worry again. Taehyung was always hungry, always ready for a snack. And, come to think of it, he was not sure when he saw Taehyung eat last. It wasn't on set, he knew that. "Get what you want." And Jungkook could only stand and watch, shocked, as Taehyung dropped the towel and crawled back in bed, naked and still dripping.

Standing in the middle of the bedroom, watching Taehyung curl up on the bed, Jungkook just, he didn't know what to do next.

He was scared Taehyung wouldn’t make it out this time. It was hard crawling out of the rabbit hole last time. The damage those assholes had caused was extreme. Taehyung seemed like he didn’t want to fight anymore.

Jungkook sat on the couch, clutched Taehyung’s favorite throw pillow to his chest and thought back to everything that had happened in the past week or so. Their break was over and they were back to work on the next album like he told Dr. Lee earlier. The schedule was grueling, affecting all of them. Jungkook had been sneaking off for covert naps during the day, guzzling coffee and barely making conversation.

“Too much,” Jungkook muttered to himself, “they ask too much of us.”

They needed out and fast.

Taehyung needed time to rest, to just be without anyone placing demands on him, and Jungkook got that. Jungkook pushed down his fears, and went back upstairs, crawled into bed behind Taehyung. Taehyung was sleeping, and he sighed and relaxed back into Jungkook. 

“I’m here,” Jungkook murmured, lips brushing the shell of Taehyung’s ear. 

Taehyung moved, just enough for Jungkook to think maybe he had woken Taehyung up. As if Jungkook didn't feel bad enough about himself. "If you need anything," he said. "All you have to do is ask. You know that, right?" 

"Jus' tired," Taehyung said, and was asleep again five minutes later. 

Taehyung slept on for four hours. Jungkook dozed as well, holding him, breathing him in. He was the first to wake up as well. It was nighttime already and his stomach growled in hunger.

He headed to the kitchen, ordered something for them before he made a grocery list. Deciding not to leave Taehyung, he called and got someone else to deliver the food before he started to clean up the place while waiting for their dinner to arrive.

When it did, Jungkook placed everything in plates and walked towards their bedroom. There was soft light coming from around the corner, and Jungkook was absurdly cheered to see that Taehyung had turned on the bedside lamp and was dressed in a worn t-shirt and blue pajama pants. Taehyung leaned up on one elbow, watched Jungkook quietly as he sat down the tray on the bed.

“I ordered some Italian for us,” Jungkook said, feeling awkward under Taehyung’s solemn gaze.

Taehyung nodded and looked away. “I thought you left,” he said, voice scratchy and low. Jungkook reached out, took Taehyung’s chin in hand and turned his head until their eyes met. 

“I’m not going anywhere,” Jungkook said.

Taehyung blinked and inhaled deeply.  “Smells good,”

He didn’t finish the whole plate, but he ate enough that Jungkook couldn’t wipe the smile off his face if he tried. Jungkook barely tasted the savory mix of carbonara and breaded parmesan chicken on his tongue, he was so relieved.

Taehyung was coming out of whatever daze he had fallen into back at the therapist.

“I’m going to clean these up,” Jungkook said ruefully and moved to stand.

Taehyung reached out, touched his fingertips to Jungkook’s wrist. “Stay,” he said.

Jungkook instantly dropped the tray on the nightstand, had to force himself not to leap back into bed, moving slowly, curling up against Taehyung until their foreheads and knees were touching on the mattress. He reached out, slipped a hand under the soft cotton of Taehyung’s shirt, and stroked a hand up and down Taehyung’s side. “Okay,” he pressed a kiss to Taehyung’s cheekbone. 

Strangely enough, scarily enough, that kiss made Taehyung flinch and tense. Jungkook sat up, looks down and tried not to panic when Taehyung didn't turn to meet his gaze. 

"I mean," Taehyung said, stumbling over those two words like he had been talking for an hour and finally lost track of what he was saying. "I mean, if you want to. You don't have to. I just…" 

"Hey," Jungkook said, soft and soothing as best he could when his heart was hammering in fear. "Hey, of course I want to stay." Why would Taehyung think any different? 

“It’s just…,” Taehyung wetted his lip, gaze bouncing from Jungkook’s mouth to eyebrow to somewhere over his shoulder. “I know I can be hard to deal with sometimes. I was doing okay, but earlier at the therapist I slipped again.”

“I understood that,” Jungkook said. “And I don’t blame you. It’s not something you can control. It just happens.”

Taehyung’s face softened. “Why are you so perfect?”

Jungkook flushed instantly. “I’m not.”

Taehyung closed the distance between them. Their chests crashed together as Jungkook’s hands came up to frame Taehyung’s face, fastening his mouth against Taehyung’s.

He kissed Taehyung with all the frustration and fear and guilt he had been feeling for the past weeks. He stroked little circles against Taehyung’s temples, lets his fingertips delve into thick, soft hair. His body had been aching for this, this contact and touch. It was not about sex, the comfort and familiarity of Taehyung’s skin, his heat and his curves. Jungkook was relieved on more than one level when Taehyung slumped into him, parted his lips to Jungkook’s kiss, because he couldn’t pull away now. 

“I don’t want you to take to heart any word or action I say or make when I slip,” Taehyung told him as they cuddled. “I don’t mean it, but I can’t help it. I’m good one second and the next I feel like I don’t deserve to be alive, don’t deserve to have you loving me. I feel that you’re wasting your life away on someone like me.”

“Taehyung-“

“Please, let me finish,” Taehyung interrupted.

Jungkook hummed and let him.

“No matter what you say, when I’m in that dark place, my head shut off and I can’t hear anything but my thoughts,” Taehyung explained. “And those are dark and ugly. I hear them nonstop till I start believing them.”

“I wish I could stop you before you slip,” Jungkook meant it.

“I should learn how to do it on my own,” Taehyung retorted. “I need to learn to fight those thoughts till they disappear.”

“How can I help then?” Jungkook tilted his head to stare into the set of eyes he adored the most.

“I want you to take care of me,” Taehyung asked gently. “I want you to stay with me even when I tell you to go away. It’s not fair and I’m sure it’ll hurt you, but I swear that I don’t mean it. I wouldn’t want you to leave me. I love you and can’t survive without you.”

“I’m not going anywhere,” Jungkook said and closed in for another kiss. “I promise to love you till the end of our days.”

-=oOo=-

Sejin wasn’t surprised when Jungkook told him of his and Taehyung’s decision to quit. They hadn’t mentioned anything to the guys, but they planned to once they settled everything with the label. After all, they were under tons of contracts it would be a miracle to get out of. They could only try and hope that the label would compromise and come to a settlement.

“I knew this day would come,” Sejin admitted. “Even since Taehyung started seeing the therapist.”

Jungkook didn’t comment, just waited.

“I’ll arrange a meeting with Bang PD soon,” Sejin announced. “I’m sure he saw it coming as well.”

“Do you think he’ll agree?” Jungkook inquired.

“We’ll have to wait and see,” Sejin replied.

A few days later found them in Bang PD’s office. There was a deafening silence, suffocating the room with tension. No one dared to say anything until Sihyuk broke it.

“Just like Sejin, I expected you to quit a few months ago,”

“I was going to, but Jungkook suggested traveling a lot during the break,” Taehyung replied. “It worked and I started feeling better, but after the kidnap, I felt like going back to square one, even worse than before. I don’t think I’ll be able to perform on stage ever again. Even the thought of it freaks me out.”

“I see,” Sihyuk nodded in understanding. “What about you?” He turned towards Jungkook.

“If he goes, I do as well,” Jungkook said briefly.

Sihyuk smiled, shaking his head. “You’re ready to give up your dream for Taehyung?”

“In a second,” Jungkook didn’t hesitate.

Sihyuk looked impressed. “When we found out you were dating, I must admit that I didn’t expect you to last. I thought it was a crush that you’ll get over it. But then you broke up during DNA era and I saw the damage it had left on you. It was then that I realized that it was serious. I underestimated your love because of your age, but you made me realize that age is just a number. Your love is real, pure and precious. It must be protected at all cost.”

Jungkook held Taehyung’s hand under the table and squeezed it gently, conveying his happiness at what they were hearing.

Things were looking up already.

“I can’t help but feel guilty,” Taehyung said. “We’re being selfish and this will cost the group a lot. Losing two members at once won’t be easy.”

“Have you talked to them about it?” Sihyuk inquired, nodding when the couple shook their heads. “Good. Don’t tell them anything.”

“At all?” Jungkook asked, looking confused.

“Listen to me,” Sihyuk leaned on the table, changing his tone to a serious one. “Quitting will affect the group, but the boys love you, so they’ll support you. You could quit and start over wherever you want. But for how long?”

The couple exchanged looks, the happiness they felt earlier evaporating.

“The fandom will be divided. I bet most of your fans will leave as well and the rest who remains will blame us and the guys for driving you to quit.” Sihyuk continued. “It’ll be a never ending mess.”

Taehyung sighed heavily, closing his eyes as he leaned his head against the chair rest. “So, there is no way out. I can’t leave now, knowing all of this. I can’t have that on my conscience. We had worked so damn hard to be where we are right now, to have this solid fanbase. I can’t be the reason of ruining it all.”

“I’m just putting you in the large picture,” Sihyuk countered.

“Which means we’re stuck forever,” Jungkook replied. “As Tae said, there is no way out.”

“There is of course,” Sihyuk chuckled.

“What Pang PD means is that you won’t have to quit but to go a little bit overboard,” Sejin said. “If you quit, the sasaengs won’t take long to locate you and stalk you even worse than before. Some may even try another assault to punish you for breaking the group.”

“By overboard you mean?” Taehyung didn’t like the sound of it.

“Faking your deaths,” Sihyuk finally dropped the bomb.

Jungkook’s eyes widened in disbelief. Taehyung wasn’t doing any better. “Are you serious?”

“It’s doable if you agree,” Sihyuk didn’t look like he had just suggested a crazy plan. “I can arrange for everything right this instant.”

“You’ll be safe to start over anywhere you want,” Sejin added. “You can have new identities. No one will be able to locate you and if they do, legally they wouldn’t be able to prove anything. You’ll be dead to the world.”

“It’s a bit extreme,” Taehyung stated.

“We only want the best for you,” Sihyuk confessed. “It’s clear as day that you’re both not happy being idols and we can’t force you to remain as such if you don’t want to.”

“What about the contracts?” Jungkook thought suddenly.

“We’ll take care of everything once you give us your consent,” Sejin said.

“This is crazy,” Taehyung shook his head, trying to wrap it around the whole thing. “The guys will be shook to hear of this.”

“Hmm,” Sihyuk said, gaining their attention again. “You can tell them, but you won’t stay in touch with them…ever. Same goes with your family. When you leave, you do it for good. They can never know where you had gone to.”

“What?” Jungkook gasped in shock for the second time.

“No. No way,” Taehyung refused to accept it. “You can’t expect us to cut them out of our lives like that.”

“It’s for your own good and theirs as well,” Sejin explained. “If they didn’t know, they wouldn’t be tempted to visit you one day and lead sasaengs to you.”

“It’ll be like we died for real,” Jungkook argued. “It’s not fair.”

“No, we can’t do that to them,” Taehyung stood up suddenly. “Forget about quitting. We’re not going anywhere anymore. Sorry for wasting your time.” He pulled at Jungkook’s arm, pulling him to his feet.

“Think about it,” Sihyuk stood up as well. “It’s crazy, but you can’t deny that it’s smart. As a businessman, it would damage me to lose you, but I’m your mentor overall and I only want the best for you.”

Jungkook simply nodded and followed his boyfriend out.

“I know that look,” Taehyung said as he drove them back home. “You’re considering it.”

“What if I am?” Jungkook didn’t deny it.

“Don’t even think about it,” Taehyung warned him. “It’s not worth it. We can’t, Jungkook. We can’t hurt the guys like that.”

“What about you? And me? Us? You’re not the only one who’s done, Taehyung. I’ve considered leaving it all behind too many times to count before. I only remained for you. Now, if you’re leaving, I’m leaving, too. I loved performing because it’s something I enjoy, but also because I had you there.”

“We can just quit then,” Taehyung suggested.

“You heard Bang PD,” Jungkook reminded him. “And he’s right. If we just quit, the backlash will be severe. We’ll be hated on, chased down and even hurt. But if they believe that we had died, that would put an end to everything.”

“What about our family and the guys? We can’t hurt them like that,” Taehyung argued. “It’s too much, Guk. And we can’t be without them as well. We’re family.”

“I know,” Jungkook sighed in exasperation. “But I’m not happy anymore, Tae. After everything that happened in the last year, I just want to be happy again. I know I will be only if I act selfish…even brutal.”

“I don’t know,” Taehyung looked conflicted. “I’m not sure anymore.”

“We can’t build a future together here, Tae,” Jungkook tried again. “We can’t even go out on dates like the rest of couples. We’re not normal according to our society, let’s face it. And I can’t anymore. I want to live my life the way I want. I want to love the way I want. I want to walk down the streets, hold your hand and kiss you whenever I want. I want to be myself.”

“I want that more than anything,” Taehyung admitted. “I’m ready to risk it all, but I love our family and the guys so much. They’ll be so devastated to have us disappear on them.”

“They’ll move on with time,” Jungkook reasoned. “Time heals all wounds.”

“I’m not sure about that,” Taehyung replied.

Jungkook decided to drop it for the time being.

-=oOo=-

Things carried on normally with them being busy with practice for the comeback. Jungkook let the subject rest for a bit, leaving the decision in Taehyung’s hand.

“You gotta lose some to gain some, isn’t it?” Taehyung said one night as they slid into bed and cuddled.

Jungkook hummed, kissing his forehead.

“I’ve been thinking about it a lot,” Taehyung confessed, caressing Jungkook’s hand with his. “It’s all I thought about. Even the guys noticed.”

“And?”

“How do we know that the fans won’t recognize us, wherever we decide to settle?” Taehyung questioned, dropping a valid point.

“We’ll make sure to start over somewhere we won’t be then,” Jungkook suggested easily.

“I hate that you’re so chill about it,” Taehyung complained.

“I just want it to be over,” Jungkook elaborated, kissing his eyelids this time. “I just want to go somewhere I won’t have people scrutinizing my single move, criticizing me for being human, expecting so much from me because I’m the Golden Maknae, hating you just for breathing next to me. You see, Tae? It’s not just because of you, or what happened to you, I have my own demons as well.”

“How come you never shared them with me?” Taehyung sat straight to look at him properly. “This relationship is a two way street, Guk. You should have told me, no let everything be about me or my fears or-“

“Slow down,” Jungkook clasped his face in his palms. “I didn’t need to because one look from you was enough to erase all my worries. One smile and suddenly everything was okay. One kiss and every sweat or tear was worth it. You made it worth it, Tae.”

“Guk,” Taehyung melted and closed his eyes as he nuzzled Jungkook’s palms before he kissed each one of them.

“You helped me come out of my shell and made me enjoy being an idol. You made me discover the beauty of life and what love is all about. You made me know myself and love myself. You did all of this and more without even knowing.” Jungkook leaned in to kiss him.

Taehyung reciprocated instantly.

It was soft and liberating.

“You made it my worthwhile too, Gukkie,” Taehyung whispered against his lips. “I’m still struggling, every day feels like a new battle, but I have you, loving me the way you do, and I feel that I can win.”

“You will win, we both will,” Jungkook kissed him again.

“Let’s do it then,” Taehyung decided at last.

Jungkook’s widened slightly. “You’re sure?”

Taehyung nodded. “The guilt will eat me away for sure, but at least I’ll be safe and happy. I gotta put myself and my state of mind first. Like you said, we need to lose for us to win.”

Jungkook agreed, smiling happily. “Let’s do it then.”

-=oOo=-

The members were shell-shocked when they told them about the plan, but they took it well.

“I saw it coming and I told Namjoon,” Yoongi admitted, turning to said man, who nodded in confirmation.

“Why not just quit?” Hoseok inquired. “Why go to such a length?”

“Bang PD is scared for his label,” Namjoon replied. “We’re his goldmine. Imagine if the fandom divided after Tae and Guk left; he would lose tremendously.”

“I’m sure he cares about you,” Yoongi added. “But his suggestion is also influenced by his fear of damaging his business.”

“I don’t really care much about his real intentions,” Jungkook replied, wrapping his arm around Taehyung when this latter leaned into him. “As long as we get to escape from all of this.”

Jimin remained silent, sitting across from them. Yoongi went to sit next to him. “What do you think?”

Jimin blinked, as if awoken from a trance. “Huh?”

“What do you think about what Tae and Guk said?” Yoongi repeated.

“The group won’t be the same without them, but I care about their well-being more, so I support them.” Jimin turned to the couple. “I just want you to be happy.”

Taehyung’s face softened. Jungkook smiled gratefully at him.

“It’s not like we won’t ever see you after you leave,” Hoseok chuckled.

“We’ll follow you wherever you go,” Jin muttered. “You can’t get rid of us.”

Taehyung and Jungkook shared a look before they forced fake smiles on their faces, nodding at them.

“When are you planning to quit?” Jimin inquired.

“We don’t know,” Taehyung answered. “We need to tell Sihyuk first of our decision. We hadn’t before since we wanted to talk to you first.”

They had told the guys the plan, but kept the disappearing part to themselves. Sihyuk insisted on it and they couldn’t do anything but comply.

-=oOo=-

When they told Bang PD of their decision, he began working on the plan right away. He also instructed to keep behaving normally around everyone so as not to raise any suspicion.

The couple did as told except that Taehyung grew clingier. The fact that they had only a few weeks left before they disappeared made them, especially Taehyung, savor every second spent around the boys.

Then comeback happened.

The album released and broke every record imaginable. It was insane. Everyone was ecstatic, but the couple was preoccupied by what was coming.

Sihyuk called then to tell them that the plan would be set in motion right after the album showcase. Taehyung found himself forced to perform, but it was for the last time, so he compromised.

That night, he clang to the members like a koala, hugging them and whispering that he loved them more than anything. Jungkook chose to cheer on them before going on stage. He didn’t want to make them suspect anything as to why the two maknaes were more affectionate than usual.

When it was time to perform, Jungkook gave it his all. He sang his heart out. He danced like never before.

It was the best performance of his career.

It was also his last.

“Goodnight, guys,” Taehyung hugged each one of them tightly. “I love you.” He said as they were ready to leave the venue.

“I love you, too,” Jimin replied, hugging him back. “You too, Guk. I love you. Sleep well. See you tomorrow.”

No, you won’t. Jungkook wanted to say. “I love you, too, hyung.”

They greeted the rest of the group and slipped into their car towards a secret location until the plan was executed.

They had already packed everything they would need and locked their house, leaving the keys with Sejin.

Mid-way they met a team sent by Bang PD. They took their car and their phones and drove them to a secret location outside of Seoul where they were instructed to stay in for two weeks before they could leave the country.

They explained to them how they were going to die, how it was going to be delivered to the people and when their funeral was going to take place.

The house they stayed in was cozy. The fridge was stuffed with food. They were allowed to watch TV and had access to the internet.

Hours later, they googled themselves and saw the news articles, saw the headlines screaming: “V and Jungkook of BTS are victims of a car crash!” They sat down, witnessing the frenzy the fandom went through, dying in worry over them, whether they had made it or not.

Next day, their death was reported and the fandom lost it.

“V and Jungkook of BTS pronounced dead after the car crash!”

The accident happened because of a problem in the brakes. Jungkook, who was behind the wheel, lost control of the car, which led this latter to fly over a bridge and sink into the river. By the time, paramedics and the police had arrived, the two were in a very critical condition. The doctors did their best to save them, but alas…

The autopsy report left no room for doubt. It mentioned personalized items they left in the car, the clothes they were wearing, tattoos they had in private places and birthmarks. A lot of pressure was put on to make their death as believable as possible, especially in the face of the media and fans. They couldn’t afford any lingering doubts and no digging; they needed instant acceptance.

And so Taehyung and Jungkook died and life went on without them. The days they had to stay hidden were spent uselessly browsing the internet, more often than not googling BTS name. They browsed their twitter, read and reread every old post, but there was nothing but deadly silence on the guys’ end. Though there were thousands of messages from their fans, words of condolences and sympathy, there was not a single word from the boys themselves.

The couple didn’t even want to start to dissect how that made them feel. Mostly, they felt sad and terribly, oh so terribly, guilty.

They were dead to the world, dead to BTS. Gone, irreversibly, being mourned, grieved. They saw pictures of their funeral, watched footage of the celebrities who attended. Taehyung flipped the laptop close when the camera focused on his members. He couldn’t handle seeing them attending their fake funeral. He hated that they had to subject them to that.

“Fucking hell,”

Jungkook pulled him into his arms, kissing his temple.

“They’re so hurt, Guk,” Taehyung started crying. “I can’t believe we did that to them.”

“What’s done is done, love,” Jungkook was feeling worse, but he had to stay put. Someone had to. It hurt now, but it would pass and then the boys would go with their lives, start the natural process of healing. He wondered how much that would take, hoped it wouldn’t be too long.

The second week went by. They still googled themselves and BTS daily, still got disappointed at the lack of contact from them to the outside world. The guys were always online, especially Jimin. Now, there was nothing. Not a word, not a single fucking sad smiley, absolutely nothing.

“We fucked up,” Taehyung said again. He was scared for his friends. He was unsettled to a whole new level. He was stupid to think their disappearance wouldn’t have such a profound effect on the boys. Of course they would be crushed. They were brothers. Yet Jungkook and Taehyung went ahead and hurt them. “We didn’t even say goodbye. They must be worried sick about us. And management won’t tell them anything. It’s done. We cut them out for good.”

“We can’t take it back now,” Jungkook replied.

“Oh, shut up,” Taehyung stood up to start pacing. “I’m so fed up with you being calm about it.”

Jungkook’s face darkened. “Excuse me?”

“I hate that I’m only one freaking out about it,” Taehyung complained. “I’m hurt and guilty and your positivity had started to drive me insane. Stop being so fucking chill about everything. We fucked up. Let’s face it.”

“What do you want me to do then?” Jungkook approached him, trying hard to keep his anger in check. “Scream from the rooftops that we’re still alive? Call for a conference instead? Oh, hi. We’re still alive, you know? Sorry for lying to you. What the fuck do you want me to do?”

“Nothing,” Taehyung’s nostrils flared. “Absolutely nothing. Go sit in the corner and let me be.”

“You’re being an asshole right now,” Jungkook spat. “You’re making me to be the villain here. It wasn’t just my decision, okay? It was mutual. We knew what was at stake. I just didn’t begin to have second doubts about it.”

“I’m not having second doubts,” Taehyung denied. “Don’t put words in my mouth, Jungkook.”

“Then, shut the fuck up!” Jungkook lost it. “You think you’re the only one who’s suffering now, feeling guilty over this? I’d hate to break it to you, but you’re not. But one of us has to stay calm, be rational. Otherwise, we would ruin everything Bang PD had worked for to help us.”

Taehyung was rendered silent.

“Since it happened you hadn’t ceased whining about the boys and the fans and the media,” Jungkook continued his rant. Now that the dam was broken, there was no turning back. “How about me? I may not say something; I never express myself openly and you should know, but I’m hurting as well. My parents were there, Taehyung. They were there. They had attended my funeral. Three years of silence, nothing but a cold shoulder, shunning me away for being gay, and suddenly, they show up. To attend my funeral. I’m devastated, but you can’t see it. You’re too busy crying over the guys.”

“Jungkook,” Taehyung’s face fell and he tried to approach him.

“I don’t’ want to hear it,” Jungkook brushed him off and walked away. There was a weight room in the basement and that was where he headed to burn off some steam. Working out always helped him clear his thoughts.

“What a mess,” Taehyung walked to their room, threw himself on the bed and face-palmed. He had no one to blame but himself. He wasn’t short tempered by any means, but whenever he got anxious, he didn’t know what went over him to act like an ass towards Jungkook.

With a sigh, he took his clothes and changed into black shorts and a tank top, moving to lie down, feeling drained emotionally and physically.

He fidgeted on the bed for a while, willing to force himself to sleep, but he failed. Who was he kidding? He knew he wouldn’t sleep if he didn’t fix things with Jungkook. The idea that the other man was angry at him because he acted foolishly hurt him.

When Jungkook was done with his workout, he headed straight to the shower. Taehyung watched him walk into the room with nothing but a towel around his waist, which he threw on the floor to put on his boxers before he slipped under the covers, his back to him.

The act for some reason put a smile on Taehyung’s lips. “You know,” he started, “I just realized that we hadn’t decided on where to go from here.” Jungkook didn’t say a word. “We discussed before that we want to start over somewhere in Europe, but we hadn’t picked where exactly.” Jungkook again hadn’t said a word. Taehyung sighed and moved closer to wrap his left arm around Jungkook’s waist, seeking his warmth instantly. “Maybe Belgium or Switzerland? How about Czech Republic?”

Nothing.

Taehyung sighed heavily.  “Jungkook, I’m sorry. I’m sorry for acting like a moron and speaking to you that way.”

Jungkook still didn’t answer but he rolled around so that he was facing Taehyung. This latter leaned on top of him, close to his face so that they could look into each other’s eyes. “That was my anxiety talking, Jungkook. I’m sorry for what I said. I didn’t mean it. I’m sorry for not taking your feelings into consideration.”

“It’s okay,” Jungkook nodded at him.

Taehyung fought against the urge to cry. “Do you want to talk about it? About you parents, I mean?”

Jungkook shook his head. “There isn’t much to say. Their attendance wouldn’t change a thing. It doesn’t have to mean anything anymore. It’s too late anyway.”

“I’m your family, okay?” Taehyung rested his head on Jungkook’s shoulder. “From now on, we are each other’s family. To infinity and beyond.” He promised. “I love you so much, so much, I can’t live without you. You’re my everything, Jungkook. I love you. I love you.” He kept repeating until his heart went back to its regular beating tempo instead of erratically. “I’ll never doubt you again, I swear.”

“Apology accepted,” Jungkook answered and pulled away from the hug. “Now that it’s settled, can we have sex? The workout only made me horny.”

Taehyung chuckled and grabbed the back of Jungkook’s neck to crush their lips together. Jungkook smirked into the kiss and returned it hungrily as he pushed Taehyung down the mattress to straddle him. He grabbed the hem of Taehyung’s top and pulled it up, over his head. Then, he mouth began to run kisses all over Taehyung’s chest, his teeth nipping at him. Taehyung winced in pain but then let out a moan when Jungkook licked where he bit. Once he made sure he marked Taehyung on several spots, Jungkook moved to the short and underwear, taking them off in a hurry. Taehyung smiled when Jungkook stared at his naked form hungrily. “Well, do something!” he urged.

Jungkook smirked and started by teasing Taehyung’s nipple into his mouth, licking the mound with his tongue. Taehyung’s back arched and he wrapped his arms around Jungkook, encouraging him to keep going. He was moaning lightly with his mouth closed and he could feel Jungkook’s hard length in between his legs. It made him impatient as he wanted Jungkook now. This latter might have sensed him because he stopped teasing Taehyung’s nipples and licked his way up Taehyung’s sternum up to his neck and then his ear. He pulled back and his beautiful black eyes stared into Taehyung’s eyes.

Taehyung couldn’t help but blush. “What?” he asked and moaned when Jungkook didn’t answer but lubed one of his fingers, seizing it inside Taehyung instantly to prepare him.

“You’re gorgeous,” Jungkook whispered as he added a second finger, then a third, scissoring them expertly.

Taehyung’s face flushed. “I love you so much!”

“Ready?” Taehyung blinked when he realized that Jungkook had already prepared him with enough lube. He nodded and pulled Jungkook down to meet his lips as his body started to take motion with Jungkook’s hardness slipping inside.

Jungkook eased out and then back in. His experienced movements drove Taehyung insane. Jungkook’s head was suppressed into Taehyung’s neck as his erection was buried inside. Taehyung’s moans grew louder while Jungkook’s pace began to speed up. It got highly intense as Taehyung’s body began to tremble under him. Jungkook rocked into him over and over, then he lifted his right leg so he could get deeper into him.

“Jungkook,” Taehyung moaned even louder when Jungkook let go of his leg and Taehyung repositioned himself with his legs bent and spread wide. Jungkook fit wonderfully in between. He leaned down and kissed Taehyung’s lips and then down Taehyung’s neck as he continued to move in and out. Taehyung’s climax was coming and his legs started to shake. Jungkook placed his head in Taehyung’s neck as he groaned. Taehyung could feel the tremors starting down his spine and the tightening of his muscles.

“Come with me, baby!” Jungkook growled in Taehyung’s ear, and the sound of his voice made Taehyung come over the edge. “T-Tae,” Jungkook growled Taehyung’s name as he came too.

Taehyung could feel Jungkook’s member pumping out the semen along his inside. It made his orgasm last much longer. “Love you so much!” he moaned in Jungkook’s ear as his climax started to subside.

Later that night, Taehyung stared up at the ceiling, listening to Jungkook’s soft breathing. They had gone another round before Jungkook fell asleep instantly. Taehyung chose to stay awake for a while, reflecting on the events that took place today.

Once again, Jungkook had succeeded in wiping away all his worries. However, he needed to learn how to keep his emotions under check around the other man. He couldn’t risk upsetting him like he did tonight.

Jungkook promised him forever and he swore to love him the way he deserved.

With a smile, he turned to Jungkook and initiated some ear nibbling. Jungkook smiled in his sleep and his eyes started to flutter a little. Taehyung couldn’t help but laugh and surprisingly it didn’t wake the other man. Taehyung did it again except a little bit harder.

Nothing.

What a heavy sleeper! Taehyung bit a little harder, regretting it instantly as Jungkook’s hand came flying and knocked him in the face. “OW!” he yelled, grabbing the bridge of his nose and he started to laugh.

“Oh, my God, Taehyung, I’m so sorry!” Jungkook jumped up and started to check Taehyung’s nose.

Taehyung pushed his hand away and continued to laugh. He didn’t know why he was laughing, but for some reason he found Jungkook hitting him in the face while he was asleep, ridiculous. “Remind me not to fuck with you in your sleep.” Taehyung massaged his nose as his laughing diminished.

Jungkook let out a deep chuckle that was sexy as hell. “I’m sorry, baby.” He leaned in and kissed Taehyung lightly on the nose.

“It’s fine,” Taehyung sighed. “Now, go back to sleep.” He whispered as he planted a kiss on Jungkook’s soft lips. “It’s late. I’ll do the same.”

Jungkook kissed him one more time and tucked him into his side. “Goodnight, baby,”

“Goodnight, my love,” Taehyung answered back. He thought and closed his eyes, snuggling into the love of his life’s naked, warm body.

Right before sleep claimed him, a thought suddenly struck him.

Austria.

He planned to share the thought with Jungkook first thing in the morning.

-=oOo=-

When Sejin called them next, he didn’t tell them much about the members’ states. “It’s better that you don’t know,” he replied remorsefully. “We said the same to them. They keep asking after you, but we made a decision and we’ll stick to it till the end.”

The couple yielded and told him about Austria. He informed them that it would take time to set up everything, but most importantly, they could finally leave the country.

“Your new IDs and passports are ready,” Sejin explained. “We have transferred all your assets into new accounts, got you new phones with new numbers. The guys will go see you tomorrow to hand you over everything and help you with anything you may need.”

“Thank you, hyung,” Taehyung was really grateful to him. “We could never repay you for what you did for us. You and Sihyuk hyung.”

“It’s nothing, Tae,” Sejin said gently. “I’ve always considered you and Jungkook my sons. I love you and only want you to be happy and safe. Go live your life. I’ll keep you in my prayers.”

“We love you too, hyung,” Jungkook replied this time.

And just like he said, two men showed up the next day to explain the upcoming steps of the plan.

“What do you mean by separate?” Taehyung’s eyes widened in surprise. “Sejin said nothing of this sort.”

“Because he’s not the one in charge,” The first man, Dongwook, said. “We are.”

“We’re only here to help you,” The second man, Youngbae, added. “So, you have nothing to fear. Trust us.”

“Our priority was to execute the fake death plan perfectly,” Dongwook continued. “So, where you would be going next had to wait. We couldn’t risk have someone suspect anything. Now, that the whole world thinks you’re dead, we can proceed.”

“Elaborate,” Jungkook instructed, taking Taehyung’s hand in his to help him relax.

“From now on, you’ll be called Lee Seunghyun,” Dongwook handed Jungkook his new ID and passport.

“And you’ll be Choi Jiwon,” Youngbae did the same to Taehyung.

“We’ll escort you to your next destination while the rest of our team works on finding you a secure place in Austria,” Dongwook explained. “But you can’t stay together anymore. I’m going to escort you, Jungkook, to Paris where we’ll stay for a while.”

“And I’ll take you to Amsterdam,” Youngbae informed Taehyung. “We will take private planes of course and go through private gates.”

“Separate,” Taehyung’s heart dropped.

Jungkook squeezed his hand. “We’ll stay in touch all day long. We have new phones now. I’ll be there for you, darling.”

That seemed to calm the man down and he turned to nod at Youngbae. “Let’s do it,”

They separated the next day.

Jungkook spend the entire night cuddling Taehyung, whispering sweet nothings into his ear, kissing him long and passionate in promise. When Taehyung boarded the plane towards Amsterdam, he breathed out a long sigh of relief, feeling free and on the verge of a new chapter of his new life.

He couldn’t wait for it to begin.

He ventured out only twice to change air. Youngbae accompanied him every time and brought him everything he needed, but he stayed mostly in his room to facetime Jungkook.

“I miss you,” He confessed one night. “I miss you so much, Guk,”

“I miss you more, sunshine,” Jungkook was lying in bed, only sweatpants on.

Taehyung devoured his body with his eyes, salivating at the sight. Jungkook’s form had always left him breathless. “I can’t wait to see you,”

“Soon, my love, soon,” Jungkook stared at him warmly. “It’ll pass, like all the other times had.”

“I’d say what we had gone through during DNA era was the worst,” Taehyung recalled, almost wincing at the bitter memories.

Jungkook actually winced. “Don’t remind me, please,”

They were so happy and so in love for years already; they were proud they could hide it for long, that was until management found out during DNA era and they started separating them. They didn’t allow them to have photoshoots together or be in the same teams. On stage, they had to stay apart, never interacting.

It took a toll on them. So, they broke up. 

Management sighed in relief.

The boys watched from the sidelines as the two tried to pull themselves together for the sake of the group. Taehyung distanced himself, spent most of his time with his actor friends, whereas, Jungkook locked himself in his room, playing video games whenever he was free.

They avoided each other at first, pretending that they were doing fine, moving on, but it was only a matter of time before they couldn’t handle it anymore.

Jungkook was dying inside, housing a heavy heart whenever Taehyung was in the vicinity. He couldn’t stop staring at him, longing for him. 

It was after one of the concerts in the South American leg that Jungkook couldn’t bear it anymore. He barged into Taehyung’s hotel room, demanding to talk. Taehyung admitted he was suffering as well and couldn’t stay away. He just believed that Jungkook didn't love him anymore.

They got back together right then and swore to never be apart. 

“We had come a long way to be here,” Taehyung whispered softly. “I’m scared of what the future has in store for us, but as long as we’re together, nothing can tear us apart.”

“Look at the length we had gone to in order to be here,” Jungkook said. “I feel sad but also relieved. We’ll finally live the way we want, love the way we always dreamt.”

“Soon, my love,” Taehyung beamed.

Jungkook reflected it. “Soon.” And he liked the sound of it.

-=oOo=-

Taehyung was the first to relocate.

Youngbae escorted him to Austria through Germany by train. They rested in Vienna for two days before they rented a car and drove to Bad Gastein.

When Youngbae parked in front of the cottage, Taehyung’s eyes widened in shock.

“No way,” He stepped out of the car quickly. “You must be kidding me.”

Youngbae chuckled at his reaction. “I’m not, Tae. Welcome home.”

“Hyung, it’s gorgeous,” Taehyung was floored.

The house was big and situated in the middle of nature, surrounded by mountains from all sides.

Youngbae guided him inside, having got the key from the estate agent in town. “It’s a new house, so it’s not furnished. The area isn’t inhabited. I don’t think it will be. You won’t have neighbors for years if not at all, so you’ll have the privacy you seek. You’re safe here.”

Taehyung took in the interior, already picturing the furniture he and Jungkook would purchase to fill in the space.

“I’m…,” he got emotional. “I don’t know what to say. Hyung, thank you.” He wrapped Youngbae in a tight hug. “Thank you so much.”

Youngbae smiled as he hugged him back. “There are only two couches in the living room. Make do with them for the time being. We’re getting you two cars soon then you can drive to town and buy anything you need.”

“I’ll wait for Jungkook,” Taehyung informed him.

Youngbae nodded in understanding. “He’ll be here in two days. He and Dongwook are on the way.”

Taehyung sizzled in excitement. He couldn’t wait to reunite with the love of his life.

Jungkook had a similar reaction to Taehyung. He couldn’t grasp that they would be living in that beautiful town in that beautiful house.

“Wow,” Jungkook stormed inside once Youngbae let him and Dongwook in.

“You like it?” Youngbae followed behind.

“I love it,” Jungkook inspected the entire place, spazzing happily.

“Hey, handsome,” Taehyung came down the stairs, trying hard not to jump his boyfriend.

Jungkook wasn’t that patient as he grabbed him, slammed him against the nearest wall and kissed the daylights out of him. Taehyung moaned in his mouth, wrapping his arms around his neck.

“I missed you so fucking much,” Jungkook whispered before he kissed him again.

Dongwook and Youngbae stood awkwardly, watching the two. When things seemed to be getting steamy, they coughed to get their attention.

“Sorry to interrupt, but we need to discuss a few things before Dongwook and I leave you to it,”

Taehyung flushed from head to toe, finally coming to terms with what they were doing and on the verge of doing. He pushed Jungkook slightly off of him and fixed his clothes. Jungkook didn’t look fazed at all. He wiped his lips and turned towards the elders.

“Of course,”

The two explained how things should be handled from then on.

They could never go back to Korea.

They shouldn’t contact their family or the boys ever.

They shouldn’t venture out of Austria for at least a year.

They should preferably do any heavy shopping online, go to town to explore or shop for something light, like grocery or clothes.

Any career path should be considered after a year.

“Deal,” Jungkook said, looking at Taehyung, who nodded and held his hand. “We’ll do it.”

And that was when their new chapter had begun.

End of Flashback

-=oOo=-

It was a lot to take in.

The guys listened attentively to the couple as they recounted what happened and what led them to the moment. They didn’t know what to think, but they were definitely overwhelmed.

“Sorry, we don’t have any Korean ingredients for dinner,” Taehyung said apologetically. “They don’t sell them in town. We order them online, but we ran out.”

“It’s okay,” Jin reassured him, smiling softly. “Anything will do.”

Taehyung smiled back and headed to the kitchen to start working on their dinner.

“Wait, let me help you,” Jin rushed after him.

Jimin, who was lost in thoughts since the couple finished telling them what happened, excused himself to the garden.

“It has been so hard for him,” Yoongi justified for him. “Well, for all of us, but he took it the hardest.” Jungkook continued to stare after Jimin dejectedly. “We didn’t know half of the things you just told us.”

“Yeah, like Tae going to therapy,” Namjoon said.

“He didn’t want to bother you,” Jungkook explained. “He thought he was a burden to the group.”

“I can’t believe management knew and kept it from us,” Hoseok scoffed angrily. “They arranged for everything and then had the audacity to keep it from us. We begged them for years to tell us where you were, but they refused.”

“Tae and I were grateful to them,” Jungkook stated. “For everything they had done for us. However, when we thought about it later, we realized that they did it for their own benefit as well.”

Namjoon remembered they talked about it before. “Losing two members would have damaged the label. Fans would have bashed the hell out of them, blamed them for causing you to quit. But, you being dead; the fans would empathize and support the group even more. It was brutal but very smart.”

“We wanted to contact you several times, but we couldn’t,” Jungkook let out. “We signed a contract that we couldn’t breach. We had to be dead in every sense of the word. But, there hadn’t been a day that we didn’t think of you or miss you, but it was done and we couldn’t change a thing. We hurt you deeply and we could only live with it.”

“Are you happy?” Hoseok wondered, changing his place to sit next to Jungkook. “Because it’s what matters. After all the risk and the struggle, the fact that you’re happy is everything.”

“Happy?” Jungkook echoed, his face softening instantly. “You’d think the rush would fade after all these years. Almost fourteen years, you know? It had been fourteen years since we got together and I still love him the same way I did back then if not more. Every day feels like a new day. Plus,” He showed his hand, where a gold band decorated his ring finger.

“Holy shit,” Namjoon exclaimed in surprise.

“Good God,” Hoseok jumped on him, tackling him onto the couch. “You did it.”

“Indeed,” Jungkook chuckled.

“Congratulations,” Yoongi sent him a gummy smile. “I’m so happy for you.”

“Thank you,” Jungkook smiled back. “There hadn’t been a day that I doubted my love for him,” He continued, voice full of warmth. “We’d argue and ignore each other for days sometimes, but we always go back to each other. He’s my person. I married him two years after coming here. I needed to.”

“Okay, stop before you make me cry,” Hoseok joked, but his eyes were glistening.

Yoongi, who turned to stare at Jimin, felt his heart ache. “He’s my person as well. I would give up the world for him if he asked.”

Jungkook’s brows furrowed in confusion, looking at the others.

“I envy you so bad,” Yoongi looked back at him. “You were brave to fight for your love. And look at you now. I wish I were brave like you.”

“You did your best, hyung,” Hoseok placed a comforting arm around Yoongi’s shoulder. “It’s Jimin who had decided for you.”

Jungkook began to put two and two together and looked at Namjoon, who nodded at him, confirmed it.

“Am I a fool for still waiting for him?” Yoongi’s voice got thick with emotion. “I tried to move on more than once and I know he did as well, but it feels like he has a tight hold on my heart. He owns it; there’s no doubt about it.”

“Then, don’t give up,” Jungkook prompted him. He didn’t know the details, but he could offer a prep talk. “If he loves you as well-“

“He does,” Namjoon replied instantly. “He loves him back.”

“Then, fight for your love. Don’t go overboard like us,” Jungkook joked, causing them to cackle. “But you know.”

Yoongi nodded and stood up, walking to Jimin.

“Hmm,” Namjoon coughed to get Jungkook’s attention. “Is it the right time to tell you that I’m getting married this summer?”

Jungkook’s jaw dropped. “Really? Wow.”

“Jin is already married,” Hoseok added.

Jungkook had a whiplash. “What? When? There was nothing about it in the news.”

“Well, you see…,”

“Only you would pull off an entire wedding under the media’s nose,” Taehyung looked impressed beyond belief.

Jin shrugged smugly. “It wasn’t that hard since the wedding was a very small affair. Only our family and close friends were present. We didn’t want it to be extravagant.”

“I wish we had attended,” Taehyung smiled sadly.

Jin kissed his cheek. “It’s okay. I understand.”

“Who is she?” Taehyung turned to the pasta sauce he was stirring while Jin worked on their salad.

“She’s a family friend,” Jin replied. “We met during my cousin’s wedding three years ago. We clicked instantly. I proposed six months later.” He chuckled lightly. “She’s amazing. I had to marry her. And I did. Our 1^st anniversary is next month.”

Taehyung wrapped him suddenly into a hug. “I’m so happy for you, hyung. I’m so happy you found someone to love and to love you back. You deserve all the happiness in the world.”

Jin picked him up and twirled him around. “My darling Taetae,” Taehyung laughed happily. “I feel the same towards you and Jungkook. Don’t think I hadn’t noticed that,” he pointed at the wedding ring on Taehyung’s finger.

Taehyung held out his hand for him to inspect it. “We did it two years after arriving here. We finally could do it; belong together in every sense of the word.”

“What about kids?” Jin placed the salad in the fridge to chill, then moved to cut some bread.

Taehyung contemplated his answer. “Hmmm, we love kids, but we’re not ready yet. Not that I don’t have my hands full already with the kindergarteners I teach art.”

Jin looked at him surprisingly. “Really? That’s so cool.”

“I got a degree online,” Taehyung explained. “It was a one year course. Then, I applied to a school in town and got hired instantly. I’ve been working there for four years.”

“That’s amazing,” Jin couldn’t hide his pride. “What about the language? It must have been hard.”

“A little bit,” Taehyung pulled the pan off of the stove, sauce ready at last. “Jungkook and I hired a nice lady to tutor us. She came over every day and took us downtown to practice what we learnt. We plan to apply for citizenship when it’s time.”

Jin was truly impressed. “Why not now?”

“We need to live in Austria for at least ten years before we can,” Taehyung explained.

Jin nodded in understanding. “Well, I’m so proud of you. You had come a long way.”

Taehyung beamed. “Thank you,” He started setting the table.

Jin helped again. “You know that we don’t hate you, right?”

Taehyung didn’t think so. “You saw Jimin,”

“He doesn’t hate you,” Jin helped him place the food on the table. “We were shocked and heartbroken when you disappeared, but we didn’t hate you. We just worried for you. We, and Jimin included, understood why you did it, but we missed you so much.”

“I missed you too, hyung,” Taehyung hugged him, closing his eyes when he placed his head on Jin’s shoulder. “And I’m so glad you’re here. It feels so good to have you around; just like the old times.”

Jin kissed his forehead, hugging him back as tightly. “Let’s call the guys now. They must be starving.”

Dinner was a delight. There was a lot of jokes and chatter. It was a little awkward at first, but it quickly faded and they warmed up to each other again, as if the last seven years hadn’t occurred at all.

Except Jimin.

The man kept silent throughout the whole affair. He only ate a few bites and only under the insistence of Yoongi. When Taehyung served dessert, a lemon tart that he made himself, the guys clapped happily.

“I never imagined you’d become a housewife, Taetae,” Hoseok teased as he took a huge bite of his slice. “Dinner was so good and this is a piece of heaven. Wow, man.”

Taehyung rolled his eyes. “I’m not a housewife, but I’m glad you approve.”

“The European cuisine is so rich,” Jungkook muttered, smiling when Taehyung wiped something off of his lips. “Thanks, babe. We fell in love with the Austrian one and picked up a few recipes along the way, but I must admit that Taehyung cooks better than me.” That earned him a kiss on the cheek from said man.

“What do you do by the way?” Yoongi wondered. “I mean as a job.”

“I do freelance photography,” Jungkook explained. “I own a studio in town. I also teach dance to anyone interested.

“That’s awesome,” Namjoon praised. “It’s good to see you pursue your passion and turn it into a career.”

“Excuse me,” Jimin stood up suddenly. “I’m tired from the long trip and need to rest. Where can I, please?”

“Upstairs,” Taehyung replied. “There are three guest rooms. Ours is the one at the end of the hallway. You can pick any one you like.”

“I can take you,” Jungkook suggested, standing up as well.

Jimin shook his head. “No need. Thanks for dinner.” He then walked away.

“Wait,” Yoongi went after him.

Jungkook sat back down, pursing his lips tightly, feeling his mood drop. Taehyung took his hand, feeling the same. He looked surprised when Jungkook stood up again and walked upstairs. He followed suit only to freeze midway, turning towards the guys.

“It’s okay,” Hoseok sent him a reassuring smile. “We’re fine. Go after him.”

Taehyung found him in their room, sitting on the bed, looking dejected.

“He’s right of course,” Jungkook said once Taehyung sat next to him. “He has every reason to act cold towards us. They all do, but during dinner, I felt happy, like we were back to how we used to be. I couldn’t help but think that maybe things are going to be fine.” He scoffed, looking ready to cry. “I should have known better. It had been seven years.  A lot happens in seven years. People change.”

“Hey,” Taehyung cupped Jungkook’s face with his palms. “No tears allowed, remember? You’re not crying. Not on my watch.”

Jungkook smiled and held his wrists. “That’s my line,”

Taehyung winked and pressed their foreheads together. “We lived with the guilt more than enough, my love. Ever since we came here. But look back at the last seven years. Weren’t they worth it?”

“They were the best years of my life,” Jungkook wrapped his arms around Taehyung’s waist now. “I wouldn’t trade them for the world.”

“There you go,” Taehyung leaned in to whisper against his lips. “I love the guys and I’m so happy to have them around, but it’s short-lived. They’re going to leave and we’ll be left to carry on with our lives.”

“It sounds amazing,” Jungkook grew breathless at the closeness. His lips tingled. He needed Taehyung’s touch so bad.

“Yeah,” Taehyung whispered hoarsely, pulling at Jungkook’s lower lip with his teeth.

Jungkook whimpered and pressed their lips together at last. Taehyung smirked into the kiss but was fast to lose himself into it. Kissing Jungkook felt like heaven. His husband’s lips were plump and soft. He could never get enough.

Suddenly, they heard a knock on their door. Jungkook protested when Taehyung pulled back from the kiss.

“Guys,” Hoseok called out from behind the door.

“Later,” Taehyung promised, stealing one last kiss before he stood up. “Hey,” He smiled at the guys.

“Sorry for interrupting,” Jin smirked as he took in their states.

Jungkook laughed to cover his embarrassment. “It’s okay,”

“Yoongi and Jimin had fallen asleep already,” Namjoon informed them. “And we need…you know,”

“Oh,” It dawned at Taehyung that the guys wanted to call it a night. “Of course, you must be exhausted from the long trip. My bad. Sorry.”

“Show us where to sleep, please,” Hoseok said before he leaned close to whisper in Taehyung’s ear. “And give your hobi-hyung the best room with the best view, okay? I’m your favorite hyung after all.”

“Says who,” Taehyung teased and ran away before Hoseok could protest.

“Come back here, you brat,” Hoseok was quick to chase after him.

“Let me take you to yours,” Jungkook offered, guiding Jin and Namjoon to their respective room.

They ended up sharing, whereas, Hoseok got his wish and had his own room.

“Perks of being the favorite hyung. Goodnight, losers,” He smirked at the two as he walked into his and closed the door behind him.

Namjoon rolled his eyes. “Goodnight, guys, and thank you.” He addressed the couple. “For both dinner and the accommodation.” He then disappeared inside.

“Goodnight,” Jin kissed them both on the cheeks before he followed the rapper.

“Call us if you need anything,” Jungkook asked and closed the door after them before he turned towards his husband, taking his hand as they walked downstairs to clean the dishes. Taehyung cleaned as Jungkook wiped them dry.

“Do you think things will ever be the same?” Taehyung wondered.

“Eventually…maybe,” Jungkook wasn’t sure what the future had in store, so he couldn’t reply with conviction.

“Jimin is pissed at us,” Taehyung handed him a plate.

“He’s angry because he loves us,” Jungkook justified, wiping the plate before placing it inside the cupboard.

“I understand that,” Taehyung paused, turning towards him. “But I can’t help feeling that there’s more to it. Did you notice something during dinner?”

“I assume you mean Yoongi and Jimin,” Jungkook guessed, watching as Taehyung nodded. “I don’t know the details, but I think they are in love. Jimin rejected him, though.”

Taehyung frowned in confusion. “Why if he loved him back?”

“Something to do with us, I think,” Jungkook guessed again. “It’s been going on since we left.”

Taehyung paused cleaning again. “Yoongi hyung must really love Jimin so much to have held onto him for seven years.”

“I’d hold onto you for eternity,” Jungkook confessed immediately. “It’s not that hard.”

Taehyung chuckled, wiping his hands at last after handing Jungkook the last plate. “It is hard, Gukkie. Not everyone would wait for someone that long. It must be true love.”

“Like ours,” Jungkook insisted.

Taehyung shook his head in amusement at his antics. “It’s not a competition, silly.”

“It’s not, but if it were, I would win for sure,” Jungkook wrapped his arm around Taehyung’s waist as they walked out of the kitchen, turning the lights off on the way.

“I’d say yes,” Taehyung, in return, wrapped both his arms around Jungkook’s waist, resting his head on his shoulder as they walked up the stairs towards their room. “You’re an angel. I don’t know what I have done in my past life to deserve someone like you, loving me the way you do.”

“I think I heard this in a song before,” Jungkook teased, but he was pleased to hear it nonetheless.

Taehyung chuckled as he pushed him on top of the mattress and straddled his lap. “I’m the luckiest person on earth for having you loving me, imperfections and all, supporting me in every step I take, showing me daily what unconditional love is all about. You pulled me out of my depression. You’re the best thing that had ever happened to me.”

Jungkook’s eyes got glassy and he hid his face in Taehyung’s shoulder. “T-Tae,”

“You’re sweet and gentle,” Taehyung kissed him on his forehead then his hair then wherever he could reach. “You have a beautiful soul and you love with your entire being. You deserve nothing but happiness and I pray that I love you and make you happy the way you deserve.”

“Why do you love to make me cry?” Jungkook whined before he captured Taehyung’s lips into an intense kiss.

Taehyung tried to say something, but Jungkook was having none of it.

-=oOo=-

The boys were pleasantly surprised to wake up to a table full of a European Continental breakfast. Their mouths instantly watered at the delicious sight.

“Wow, Tae, I could get used to this,” Hoseok left a big smooch on Taehyung’s cheek.

Jin and Namjoon nodded in approval as they took in their seats.

“Stay all you want and I’ll wake you up every day to this,” Taehyung started serving food on their plates. “We’d love to have you for as long as you want.”

“Where is Guk?” Jin searched for the man.

“He had a call earlier to deliver a commission,” Taehyung explained.

“But it’s the weekend,” Jin felt sorry for him.

“He couldn’t say no,” Taehyung sat down next to Namjoon. “What do you say about going on a tour across town after breakfast?”

“It sounds amazing,” Hoseok clapped enthusiastically.

An hour later found them exploring Bad Gastein. Taehyung acted as their tour guide, showing them around happily. They stopped for bit when they reached the school he worked at. It was closed of course, but the guys were glad to see it. They also marveled whenever Taehyung interacted with the locals, as if he had been there his whole life and not for a couple of years.

“Guten Morgen, Frau Muller,” Good morning, Mrs. Muller Taehyung greeted as they stopped next to a flower shop.

The old lady’s face lit up when she saw him and she rushed out to hug him. “Jiwon,” She kissed him on the cheek excitedly before she gave him a brief hug. “Guten Morgen,” Good morning

“Wie geht es Ihnen heute?” How are you today Taehyung wondered.

“Mir geht es gut. Wie geht es dir?” I’m good. How about you? “Wo ist Seunghyun?” Where is Seunghyun?

“Er ist gerade bei der Arbeit,” He’s at work Taehyung replied.

The old lady nodded in understanding before she finally noticed the guys. “Gehören diese gutaussehenden jungen Männer zu dir?” Are these handsome boys with you?

“Ja,” Yes Taehyung turned to the guys. “Sie sind Freunde aus Korea,” They’re friends from Korea.

The old lady beamed at them.

“Willkommen! Schön euch kennenzulernen,” Nice to meet you and welcome She said warmly.

Taehyung translated to them and watched as they smiled back and bowed to her in respect.

The lady was so impressed. “Sie sind so höflich. Bring sie zu mir zum Kaffee trinken,” they’re so polite. Bring them over for coffee.

Taehyung nodded and kissed her on the cheek before they continued their journey.

“You sounded exactly like her,” Namjoon looked so impressed. “No accent whatsoever.”

Taehyung flushed in embarrassment. “Well, I had years of practice.”

“Was that Austrian?” Yoongi wondered.

“Actually, that was German,” Taehyung explained. “It’s the official language of Austria. Everyone speaks it. However, there is Bavarian, which is a dialect used in most regions in the country. I learned it as well, but Mrs. Muller is German so,”

“That’s amazing,” Hoseok tapped him on the back proudly.

They stopped several times to buy souvenirs. Taehyung did for grocery. He planned to make them Selchfleisch for lunch. Hoseok and Yoongi helped him carry what he bought.

“Oh, look. It’s Guk,” Jin pointed to said man, standing on the other side of the street, in conversation with a young blond woman. “Oh,” Jin’s eyes widened when he saw the woman place her hands on Jungkook’s shoulder to draw him closer.

He turned to the members and saw them watching Taehyung, whose face had hardened and he bit the inside of his cheek, glaring daggers at the two. Jungkook had yet to notice them. It was only after Hoseok called him that he did. His face drained of all colors when he spotted Taehyung. This latter looked away and resumed walking.

“Come, guys. Let’s go back home,” Taehyung ushered them, voice ice cold. “It’s lunch time.”

The guys shared a look and followed him obediently.

“You’re fucked,” Jimin said when Jungkook finally crossed over and joined them.

Jungkook was surprised he was speaking to him, but he quickly recovered. “I know,”

“Who is she?” Yoongi inquired.

“Just an acquaintance,” Jungkook replied. “She owns a grocery store that we used to shop from, but after Tae and I picked up on her hitting on me, we stopped going there.”

“She was all over you,” Hoseok commented.

Jungkook sighed. “She doesn’t seem to get a hint,” His eyes followed Taehyung, who was walking ahead of them with Jin and Namjoon. His form was stiffened and he wasn’t talking to either men.

He was in for a long night.

“Fucking hell, I’m definitely sleeping on the couch tonight,” Jungkook groaned in frustration.

The trio laughed at his expense. “Doesn’t sound like it would be your first,” Hoseok joked.

“It’s not my first indeed,” Jungkook smiled a little. “I don’t give two shits about her, but she doesn’t care. She knows Tae and I are married, yet she continues to throw herself at me. I’m just too polite to kick her ass no matter how tempting it is. Tae hates her with passion and we argued about her before.”

“He’s pissed,” Yoongi said, smiling at Jimin who offered to carry the grocery for him.

“I’ll make it up to him when we go home,” Jungkook intended hopefully.

“Good luck,” Hoseok chuckled, excited to see how it would turn up.

-=oOo=-

Not so good.

Taehyung ignored him altogether, turning down his offer to help with lunch then his offer to help clean. He even sat down next to Namjoon instead of next to him.

It stung so bad, but he knew it was coming. It continued for the rest of the day and when it was sleep time, he found himself facing a locked bedroom door. At least, Taehyung was kind enough to leave him a pillow and a blanket next to it.

He sighed and picked them up before he walked downstairs to the living room where the couch, his bed for the night, was waiting.

“He really kicked you out,” Jimin commented as he stepped out of the kitchen, a glass of water in hand.

Jungkook hummed, looking dejected. “I hate when he’s mad at me.”

“Nothing has changed,” Jimin sat down next to him. “He still feels possessive when someone breathes the wrong way next to you and you still sulk like a puppy when he ignores you.”

“I can’t sleep without holding him,” Jungkook whined as expected, causing Jimin to smile at the sight. “He’s so soft and he smells so freaking good. I grew used to sleeping to his warm body next to me, so I always suffer when he kicks me out of the room.”

“How about when you do it?” Jimin wondered.

“I suffer even more,” Jungkook confessed. “I miss him even when I’m angry at him.”

“I bet he’s missing you right now,” Jimin patted his hair gently. “Just give him time.

Jungkook grabbed his wrist before he could pull back. “Hyung,”

Jimin let him. “I know, Guk, I know. You didn’t mean to, but you must understand that I was so worried about you and I missed you like crazy.”

“We missed you too, hyung,” Jungkook confessed and dared to hug him. Jimin kept his hands to himself, but he didn’t push him away. “You have no idea, but we were powerless. We couldn’t do anything about it.”

Jimin sighed and hugged him back.

“Hyung,” Jungkook tightened his grip on him. “I love you, hyung. I’m sorry.”

“I love you, too,” Jimin confessed back, on the verge of crying. “I hate you for what you put me through, but I love you so much.” He finally let out all the anguish he had bottled inside of him for years.

As they cried in each other’s arms, they failed to notice Taehyung standing atop the stairway, watching the scene with tears of his own.

-=oOo=-

“A picnic?” Jin echoed.

Taehyung nodded, confirming. “In the mountains. How does it sound?”

Hoseok started fidgeting with excitement in his seat. “Do you even need to ask?”

Taehyung chuckled. “It’s settled then. I’ll go pack us a basket of food. We’ll have so much fun.”

“I can help you if you want,” Jungkook suggested, standing up already.

“No need,” Taehyung brushed him off and walked away.

Jungkook’s shoulders sagged as he sat back, looking dejected.

“I’ll go,” Jin rushed after him.

“Me too,” Hoseok followed as well.

Namjoon patted Jungkook’s back gently. “He’ll come around.”

Jungkook sighed in defeat. “I know he will, but I miss him so much. A day without him is hell.”

The boys regarded him with sympathy. Jimin and Yoongi shared a look before they went back to comforting him.

“You’re being harsh on him,” Jin commented as he helped make sandwiches. Taehyung was working on their salads. “He looks like a puppy.”

Taehyung knew it. “I hate that fucking bitch and we argued about her before, yet he never does anything about it. He always lets her get too close to touch and flirt as she likes. I’m starting to believe he enjoys her attention.”

“As long as he doesn’t reciprocate, I don’t see the problem”, Hoseok muttered as he watched them work. “She doesn’t take the hint. There are some people like that and Jungkook is just too nice for his own good.”

Taehyung packed plastic cups for the juice inside the basket. “I know and I’ll forgive him. I always do, but not now. I hated that it happened in your presence. I felt humiliated.”

“It’s not that serious, so forgive him and move on,” Jin advised, slapping Hoseok’s hand when he moved to take a piece of the cheese.

“Hyung,” Hoseok winced in pain. “Just one, please,”

Jin was having none of it. “Wait till lunch,”

“Do you need help?” Jimin asked as he walked inside the kitchen.

Jin and Hoseok turned to Taehyung, watching his reaction. Taehyung’s face lit up like the sun as he nodded. “You can put the salad in the container.”

Jimin walked next to him to do as told. Jin winked when he caught his eyes. Taehyung’s heart felt light and he continued to smile while stealing glances at Jimin.

“We’re done,” Jin announced once they finished. “Let’s go change and get going.”

They took two cars with Taehyung and Jungkook driving each since they knew where they were going. The journey took an hour. When the couple parked on top of a huge hill, the guys lost their breath.

“Wow,” Yoongi let out.

Hoseok was short for words while Jin and Namjoon shook their heads in amazement.

The view was breathtaking. Mountains surrounded them from all sides as a huge lake shone in the horizon.

Jimin took a long, deep breath, the smell of breeze, of grass and flowers surrounding them, embracing them.

“I could definitely spend the rest of my days here,” He whispered to himself.

“Don’t you mean you and Yoongi?” Taehyung heard it as he stood next to him near the edge of the hill.

The others settled the blanket and the pillows they brought along near a huge tree. Jungkook played some soft music in the background as they sat down to converse about anything and everything.

“When you disappeared, I blamed myself,” Jimin kept his eyes on the view in front of him, but he knew he had Taehyung’s full attention. “Because I couldn’t help you, couldn’t protect you. I felt like a failure. I felt responsible because if I had done something, you wouldn’t have decided to leave it all behind.”

“It wasn’t your fault, Jimin,” Taehyung reassured him, daring to take his hand. “You were there and you supported us with all your might. We can never thank you enough, but we were done, Jimin. We were done. I wish things happened differently, but we don’t regret our decision. It got us here and we’re the happiest.”

“I can tell,” Jimin smiled slightly. “I drowned my misery in alcohol for a while until I had Yoongi. He was there for me one night and we talked for hours and before I knew, we were hooking up.”

“Is it purely sex?” Taehyung interjected. “I can tell differently, you know?”

“It was at first,” Jimin admitted. “But we fell in love later. He grew to mean the whole world to me. And I hurt him when I rejected him.” Jimin’s face suddenly grew sorrowful. “I rejected him, but he never left my side. He had been there for me, loving me in the shadows, hurting over me, but never giving up. I’m the worst.”

“I assume you have your reasons,” Taehyung gave him the benefit of the doubt.

“I’m simply a coward,” Jimin’s voice got thick with sadness. “I’m not brave like you and Jungkook. I was scared that I would have to choose between Yoongi and our career. I was also scared I would be forced to do like you did. I love performing. I could never quit, but there was Yoongi. I had to choose before I got into deep and I chose. I picked my career over him, thinking that it wouldn’t hurt since we weren’t that tight, but I was wrong. I was hella wrong. Losing him hurt like nothing else before.”

“You need to compromise,” Taehyung advised, grabbing his shoulders so that they faced each other. “Meet him in the middle. It’s been years and it’s not fair to either of you.”

Jimin knew he was right. “I’m scared. I don’t want to lose my career, but I can’t live without Yoongi anymore.”

“Who said you would lose one over the other?” Taehyung cupped his cheeks in his palms, staring right into his eyes. “Don’t compare yourself to us. Jungkook and I’s case is different. We chose to lose everything because we were done with everything not because we were forced to. We wanted out.”

Jimin looked lost in thoughts as he took in his words.

“You’re a ray of sunshine,” Taehyung pulled him into a hug. “You make everyone around you happy, even when you’re hurting inside. It’s about time you put yourself first and went after what makes you happy.”

Jimin held onto him and cried. Taehyung whispered sweet nothings into his ear, kissing his temple and cheeks every now and then.

“Hey, what’s wrong?” Yoongi sounded frantic as he came rushing towards them.

Taehyung pulled back and smiled, winking at Jimin. “Do it,” He then turned to Yoongi. “I believe you need to have a serious talk, so I’ll leave you to it.” He patted Yoongi’s shoulder and walked away, leaving the two to their happy ending…hopefully.

-=oOo=-

Jungkook stared up at the ceiling as he lay on the couch for the second night. Everyone had gone to sleep after the long eventful day. They were tired, but very content. They had a blast and Jungkook, during it, didn’t sulk over his fight with Taehyung. The group managed to distract him for a bit. However, now that he was alone, he was left to feel that same void he felt whenever Taehyung wasn’t around him.

He grew so dependent on Taehyung’s presence that two days felt like two decades. It was mutual, of course, as Taehyung would cry sometimes if Jungkook got angry at him, but he wished he had a strong resolve.

His thoughts suddenly broke when he heard footsteps near the stairs. He tilted his head to check only to sit up straight when his eyes fell on his husband.

“Come sleep in your room,” Taehyung said before he turned to leave.

Jungkook never ran faster.

Quickly grabbing his pillow and blanket, he made it in record time to their bedroom. He found Taehyung sitting on the bed expectantly. Jungkook dropped everything on the floor and joined him when Taehyung held his hand out for him to take.

“I’m-” Jungkook was silenced immediately by Taehyung’s palm on his lips.

“I know what happened wasn’t intentional,” Taehyung started, smiling gently. “And it’s highly time I put that bitch in her place.”

“She doesn’t matter,” Jungkook mumbled against his palm.

Taehyung nodded. “I know, but I hated that it happened in front of the guys. We were having so much fun and then she ruined it.”

“I’m sorry,” Jungkook kissed his hand repeatedly. “If I could turn back time and..”

Taehyung shook his head. “It doesn’t matter anymore.” He pulled at Jungkook’s cheek gently. “Did you notice anything different about Jimin and Yoongi earlier at dinner?”

Jungkook noticed that the two were pretty cozy and stole kisses occasionally. Jungkook even suspected they were holding hands under the table.

“I assume you have a hand in it,” He guessed, chuckling when Taehyung pulled at his cheek again. “I saw you talk to Jimin. I guess you changed his mind.”

“I made him realize that he was wasting time when he could be happy with the man he loved,” Taehyung explained, cupping Jungkook’s face in his hands to draw him closer. “Which made me realize that I was doing the same to you. A second away from you is a second wasted, Jungkook. Life is meaningless without you. I grew to depend on you a lot, but I don’t mind. You’re my family, all I have.”

Jungkook smiled tearfully before he captured Taehyung’s lips in a long kiss. “You’re all I have as well. You own my heart, body and soul.”

“I loved to have the guys around,” Taehyung lay down and pulled Jungkook with him. Jungkook rested his head on his shoulder as Taehyung wrapped both his arms around his waist. “But they’ll leave sooner or later, leaving us to our life, to how things had been for the last seven years.”

“And we won’t see them again,” Jungkook continued for him. Taehyung hummed. “It’ll be too risky. They managed to sneak out of everyone’s watching eyes and we’re lucky no one in town recognized them, but we don’t know if we’ll be as lucky next time. We can’t risk it.”

“I bet they know it,” Taehyung whispered, playing with Jungkook’s hair. “They wanted to make sure we were fine and they did. I love them and I’m going to miss them so much, but I can’t let anything disrupt our life. We’d flee somewhere else if needed.”

Jungkook tilted his head to look at him. “I don’t think we’ll have to. Like you said, they must be aware of the risks and they’ll understand.”

Taehyung suddenly pushed him to lie on his back so that he could straddle him. “Okay, enough of this. Let’s talk about how much I fucking missed you and couldn’t sleep without you by my side.”

“Whose fault is that?” Jungkook moved his hands all the way up to Taehyung’s waist to hold him steady there.

Taehyung raised an eyebrow in response. “Really, Guk?”

Jungkook chuckled and grabbed his wrist to pull him down so that their foreheads touched. “Just kidding. What were you saying? Oh yeah. Something about missing me so fucking much, right?”

Taehyung brought their lips together, speaking the words on them. “How about I show you instead?”

Jungkook’s breath caught when Taehyung pounced.

-=oOo=-

Goodbye was bittersweet, but at least they could finally have a chance at it.

It came three days after the couple’s conversation. And just like they predicted, the boys were aware of the situation and the risk surrounding it.

When they hugged them, it was tight and warm. They didn’t know when they would see each other again, if ever, so they held on to each other with tears in their eyes.

“Please, be happy,”

“Stay safe,”

“Eat well,”

“Hold on to your love and always trust each other,”

“Remember that we love you and we wish to reunite with you one day in the future,”

Jungkook and Taehyung nodded at each advice they were given, hugging its owner tightly. “We love you too and we wish you the same."

“Goodbye, then,” Namjoon said at last and guided the boys towards their van.

Jimin remained behind to give them extra hugs and kisses.

“If you see our family, tell them that we love them and that we’re sorry,” Taehyung requested, his eyes pleading.

“Tell them we’re happy and they don’t need to worry about us,” Jungkook added for him.

Jimin promised and hugged them one last time before he joined the others.

Namjoon drove away instantly and Jimin chanced a glance back at the couple. He found Jungkook wiping Taehyung’s tears before he leaned in to kiss him. Taehyung melted into him.

Jimin sighed in content and turned around, his eyes seeking Yoongi’s eyes. When he found the man already staring, he smiled and grabbed his hand to leave a soft kiss on his knuckles.

“I love you,” He whispered and it felt so good to say it out loud at last and seeing the beautiful, happy smile he received in response made him realize that he had taken the right decision.

Thank you, Taehyung.

Thank you, Jungkook.

Thank you for showing me what love is all about.