queenofthepassiveaggressive



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  1. Public Bookmark *

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    The first time Ilya had seen Shane sweaty and flushed at the end of a hockey match-at the World Juniors in 2008-he had wanted to lick the salt right off of his skin. There was something so magnetic about Shane after a hockey match. Brown eyes bright, maybe a little cocky. Dark hair plastered to his forehead and flat from his helmet. Skin ruddy and glistening with sweat. And god, how he smelt. Salty and hot and masculine. Shane at the end of a hockey game was a fucking wet dream. Not only because he was the prettiest sweaty man Ilya had ever seen but because he was usually thrumming with confidence, especially after a win against the Boston Raiders. Every time they stood in the handshake line at the end of a match Ilya wanted to crush their mouths together and suck the sweat off his top lip.

    Or: Shane is sweaty after yoga at the cottage and Ilya is horned.

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    02 Aug 2026

  2. Public Bookmark *

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    Buck is slipping. The world narrows to the roar in his ears, and the hand squeezing his own, and something warm and tart flooding his mouth.
    “Maddie knows. She knows,” he sucks in a breath. “It was always you, it never could be anyone else.” Buck’s voice is barely above a breath. He’s not sure he’s still making any sound – or sense – at all. “When I’m – ah. Take care of him, okay?”
    His teeth, his lips are coated with something thick and sticky. He swallows what he can, but it pools under his tongue again quickly, salt and iron, and he has to swallow again.
    “Buck.”
    “You have to promise – you’re his Teddy.”

    or,

    another buddie trapped in a collapse together fic, but this time Buck has Theo.

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    30 Jul 2026

  3. Public Bookmark 90

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    Buck’s started tossing and turning thinking about the tattooist's line work—the skilled areas of saturation. Dreams about its elegance and the way the angles of the drawn-on bone move and contort with Eddie's skin whenever he reaches on tiptoes for the Ring Pops hidden in Buck's highest cupboard.

    At first, he had mistaken the dreams for envy, had figured he just wanted a tattoo that matched.

    Once Buck traversed into REM sleep and had begun jolting awake, rock hard, after dreams of tracing the boundaries of Eddie's tattoo with the tip of his tongue, he knew he was a goner. No sane, rational person counts down the seconds until their best friend drops something on the off chance that they'll bend over to retrieve it.

    or, what to do when your good friend eddie diaz acquires a tramp stamp: a guide

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    30 Jul 2026

  4. Public Bookmark *

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    “She said she wasn’t worried about us breaking up.”

    Oh. Well. That was pretty definitively a thing that people said about partners who were together romantically.

    “Say something,” Buck instructed.

    “What?”

    “Anything,” Buck said, his voice wavering on the word. Which was—it was weird, right? Why was Buck so shaken by a throwaway comment?

    Or maybe the better question was why wasn’t Eddie? If either of them was going to get freaked out by the assumption that he was dating a man, it would make more sense for it to be Eddie, who was straight, and not Buck, who had, in fact, already dated men.

    “Aren’t you going to be late for your shift?”

    -----

    Buck and Eddie get shaken up by a comment from Theo’s social worker, and then by a magnitude 7 earthquake; it turns out, some disasters are better than others.

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    30 Jul 2026

  5. Public Bookmark *

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    “What if we tested it?”

    Eddie blinks. “What if we what?”

    “Tested the theory,” Buck emphasizes, as if it’s obvious. “Like, empirically. To see if sucking dick is actually that enjoyable or if the porn is just lying to us.”

    “Buck.”

    “What?”

    Closing his eyes, Eddie takes a deep breath through his nose. “You’re suggesting we— we suck a dick.”

    “I’m suggesting we prove a point.”

    “Whose dick, Buck?” Eddie asks, nearly manic now. “Whose dick are we sucking?”

    “Well,” Buck says, slowly, like he’s working up to it. “You have a dick.”

    “I-I do. Have a dick.”

    “And I— I have a dick.”

    “You do—” Nodding, Eddie’s eyes fall to where said dick would be before snapping back up to Buck’s face. “Uh, h-have a dick.”

    “So.” Buck drags out the vowel, buying time, “between us, we have two dicks, and two mouths. The math kind of works itself out.”

    Or,
    After accidentally watching gay porn together, Buck and Eddie suck each other's dicks to prove a point.

    Or,
    Bottom Eddie Week, Day One: Fixation.
    AKA the platonic blowjobs fic.

    Language:
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    27 Jul 2026