magic_beanstalk_climber



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  1. Public Bookmark *

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    “I’m sorry, but my answer is no. Someone else might be willing to switch if you ask.”

    “I can’t believe—this is unacceptable! I’m going to call the flight attendant over and get this sorted out right now!”

    Flustered and cornered, Shane injects his Captain Voice into the conversation. “Ma’am, I understand that you’re upset, but I paid for this seat and am going to stay here. You’ll have to find someone else willing to change places or just fly with the seat you booked. I’m sorry I couldn’t help you.”

    She hisses like a goddamn tea kettle, and starts to say, “You are the most selfish man I’ve ever—” when another voice behind her says, “You are blocking my seat. Move.”

    Shane and the woman turn to assess the new arrival. It turns out that his seat partner is well above six feet tall, ripped as hell, and knows how to deliver an excellent bitch face. He’s also the hottest man that Shane has ever seen in real life, including a chance run-in with Jensen Ackles at a Stars game.

    Or, still!famous Shane meets non!famous Ilya on a cursed flight from Ottawa to Boston and kind of (totally) falls in love with him at first sight (and first chirp)

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    14,624
    Chapters:
    1/1
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    471
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    10 Apr 2026

  2. Public Bookmark *

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    Shane can’t stand his college roommate and teammate, Ilya Rozanov. Can’t stand his arrogance and his messiness and his constant sleeping around.

    But then the entire team, Shane included, welcomes their families to campus for Parents Weekend.

    And Shane also can’t stand that Ilya is alone.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    21,937
    Chapters:
    2/2
    Comments:
    574
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    16,686
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    4,012
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    08 Apr 2026

  3. Public Bookmark *

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    When Shane was displeased with Ilya, there was a certain intensity in his speech that called to Ilya like a siren song, dragging him to an early grave with its vehemence. His voice would pitch higher, bossy and prissy and so stridently righteous it should be intolerable.

    But Ilya was, for all intents and purposes, a whore. And nothing made him harder than his husband putting him in his place.

    ---

    or, 5 times ilya ragebaits shane because being yelled at by his husband turns him on, +1 time shane realizes he’s doing it on purpose.

    Language:
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    14,880
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    1/1
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    421
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    07 Apr 2026

  4. Public Bookmark *

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    That girl at the club meant nothing. Shane drunk-texting Ilya at 2 AM means everything.

    or

    A bandaid for my brain following the Club Scene in episode four.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    35,729
    Chapters:
    3/3
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    17,220
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    07 Apr 2026

  5. Public Bookmark *

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    “What do you want me to say, exactly?” Shane asked, his voice very different from the one they’d usually get for interviews. Less polite and less guarded. “Do you want me to stand here and tell you details of my sex life?”

    Someone chuckled awkwardly and when no one said anything, Shane threw his arms out to the side just as Harris made his way towards the disaster.

    Shane looked the reporter straight in the eyes. “Sure! My sex life is fantastic. My husband is hot. Ten out of ten. Any more questions?”

    Or the one time Shane Hollander was the problem

    Language:
    English
    Words:
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    1/1
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    07 Apr 2026