WhyNoDogs
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(Who Gives A F*ck About) An Oxford Comma? by Gr8t_78
Fandoms: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
07 May 2026
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Summary
Draco Malfoy and Hermione Granger somehow managed being eighth year dormmates at Hogwarts without killing each other. Despite his prickly ways, there'd even been a few moments when Hermione thought there might be something between them.
So when a paperwork mix-up meant they'll be flatmates at Oxford University, Hermione assumes it won't be so bad.
But something is off at Oxford, and she can't quite put her finger on it. Draco is acting odd, and so is everyone else.
There's definitely one important lesson she's learned at university: everyone should give a fuck about an Oxford comma.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 195,707
- Chapters:
- 34/34
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 467
- Kudos:
- 527
- Bookmarks:
- 347
- Hits:
- 36,542
Bookmarked by WhyNoDogs
20 May 2026
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Summary
Draco had a problem.
It was a Hermione Granger-shaped problem. It walked like Hermione Granger, it talked like Hermione Granger, and (when he was lucky), it chewed him out like Hermione Granger.
But he knew, deep down, that it wasn’t Hermione Granger.
Because there was no way on God’s green earth that Hermione Granger had those fucking tits.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 4,852
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 47
- Kudos:
- 636
- Bookmarks:
- 82
- Hits:
- 5,468
Bookmarked by WhyNoDogs
14 Apr 2026
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Summary
“When I want the world to know I’m fucking you, Granger, you’ll be the first to know.” He grunted, digging his fingertips into her hip and leaning into her. “Right now, you’re mine.”
Hermione is at a dead end in her career and her relationship, and her self worth has never been lower. Although she loves her job advocating for creature rights as a mid-level bureaucratic drone for Blaise Zabini's law firm, Hermione has found that it's more of an escape from her miserable relationship. However, one wizard sees through her carefully cultivated facade and offers her a deal that she can't resist: in exchange for funding research necessary to garner support on a piece of legislation for creatures rights that she's been working towards the majority of her career, Draco Malfoy simply wants Hermione's company—and anything else she's willing to give him.
*Not abandoned, I'm just a trash panda with the attention span of a gnat at the moment lol*
Bookmarked by WhyNoDogs
25 Feb 2026
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Summary
A young Hermione Granger is sorted into Slytherin House alongside the King's nephew, Draco Malfoy.
There's Gods, Duels, Mermaids, Excalibur, Dragons, and a stupidly clever Hermione.
Set Hogwarts years 1-7 and beyond.- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 1,747,238
- Chapters:
- 217/?
- Collections:
- 11
- Comments:
- 5,914
- Kudos:
- 7,861
- Bookmarks:
- 2,295
- Hits:
- 670,138
Bookmarked by WhyNoDogs
22 May 2025
Bookmarker's Notes
Wonderfully inventive story with H&D. Includes kings, mermaids, gods and a really, big dragon king.