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I certainly don't remember whose idea this silly camping trip was, but if I'd had to bet, I'd say it was Popcorn. Something about group bonding or shit. As if we didn't have better things to do. But since apparently we all need some days off, nobody protested against it really.
So here we are now, having just set up the two tents, one for me and my boyfriend Izzy, and one for the other three idiots. So far so good.
The rest of the afternoon, we just walked around the camping place, which we are basically alone at. It's not too bad actually, even beautiful with the surrounding forest's tree's leaves being all colorful and giving fall vibes.
I always knew camping as a summer thing, but maybe it could be nice in autumn too. Or, we'd regret it latest this night, freezing our asses off. But that could be a problem to worry about later.
For dinner, I am proud to say that I managed to cook something actually edible over an open fire. We did some of the usual cheesy campfire stuff afterwards, the stuff you'd usually only see in teenie movies. But I guess it was alright.
At some point, Izzy and I decided we've had enough for today and went into our tent. We put on our pj's, which contained of sweatpants, multiple layers of hoodies and sweaters and even some wool socks or something similar. Better safe than sorry, right?
After getting ready, we each get into our sleeping bags and cuddled together, making out lazily before finally falling asleep.
---~~~---
I jolted upright, sweat on my forehead, and my mind much more awake than my body. I looked around frantically, trying to get my bearings. As I calmed down a little, realizing I am in my tent with my dear love Izzy peacefully sleeping beside me, I slowly lay back down.
I try to fall asleep again, but my head just wont get quiet. Either my nightmare replays over and over again, or I am overthinking random shit from 2 months ago. It's frustrating, since I actually am damn tired.
Usually, I'd be supposed to wake Izzy, like I by now always did. But tonight, I just couldn't. Izzy has had some trouble getting proper sleep lately, and I really didnt wanna steal any of it now that he was finally getting rest.
Perhaps a little walk to clear my thoughts wouldn't hurt?
I get out of my sleeping bag as quiet as anyhow possible, putting on shoes and exchange two hoodies for a slightly thicker jacket.
Then, I write a note to Izzy, just in case he wakes up while I am out. It reads "Iz, went out to clear my head. Heading to the lake we were at this afternoon. Love, Ax". After placing that note on my sleeping bag, I leave the tent with a flashlight.
Even at night, the forest is beautiful. Creepy? As hell. But also quiet and peaceful. As I reach the lake, which is illuminated so I turns my flashlight off, I leave the path, sitting down on a rock and staring onto the water for a long time.
As I begin to feel tired, really, really tired, I decide it's time to head back. Maybe now he would be able to sleep. As I try to turn my flashlight back on, it doesn't budge.
I immediately panic, trying again and again and again, before finally realizing it won't turn on anymore no matter what I try. I panic even more.
I'm in a dark forrest, alone, with no light, in October, where it's cold, and windy, and I can barely see my own hand anymore since a cloud has gotten before the moon. I'm fucked.
The panic sparks to heights I never thought were possible. I start to get paranoia, seing hallucinations of dark figures in every dark tree branch, in every stone on the lakeshore, and every gust of wind feels like someone is creeping up behing me, grabbing me from behind and dragging me away.
Why did I think this was a good idea? Why didn't I just wake Izzy like always? He would have understood. And for God's sake, why didn't I check the damn batteries of the flashlight?!
As all these anxious thoughts overcome me, I curl up smaller and smaller. I will die here. I am sure of it. Fuck you, you stupid Axl-of-the-past, for being so dumb!
Then, the exhaustion consumes me fully and everything goes black as I fall asleep right there on the stone.
---~~~---
I feel myself shivering as fuck. It's so damn cold. And I am still so freaking tired, as if the violent shaking my body just won't stop doing is draining all last resources. But there also is a faint warmth... and I am definitely moving... but my legs aren't walking?
"Fuck, baby, you're finally awake, are you alright?" I'd recognize that voice anywhere. "Iz... cold..." I manage to get out, but it still is kinda slurred. "God, I know Ax, I know... just stay awake for me, okay? I'm getting you warm, baby.".
I just nod slightly, although my eyelids feel heavier than ever before. But somehow I manage to push through it, just for Izzy, as we make it to our tent. Izzy immediately takes my jacket off, helping me into more sweaters instead, even one of his. That, I enjoy a lot, since now his scent is engulfing me, making me feel safe.
"Thanks, Iz..." I slurr out, although the slur has already gotten less if you'd ask me. "Can you drink something for me, Axl?" I nod slightly, still not fully trusting my voice despite the improvement.
Izzy pulls out a thermos bottle with some sweet tea from earlier. He pours some in a cups and sets it aside to let it cool off a bit. I don't need a burned tounge on top of this crap.
After I drank some of the tea, (I actually hate tea), Izzy settles me into the bigger one of the sleeping bags, then gets in too.
It's cramped as hell, but I sure wont complain about some cuddling. After we just are there for a bit, I'm already half asleep, Izzy finally asks quietly "What were you doing out there? You could have died of hypothermia if I hadn't gone to find you. You know it's dangerous to go alone, especially at night..."
"I know, I just... the battery of my flashlight ran out. I didn't know how to find my way back..." Izzy sighs. "But why were you outside at all in the middle of the night?"
I look down, burying my face deeper in his shoulder. "I had a nightmare and didn't want to disturb your rare sleep." "Oh love... nothing matters more to me than you, you know that, right?" "I do, just... wanted you to get some rest. Please tell me it's okay and I haven't fucked up..."
"It's fine, okay? But please, never scare me again like that. Now rest, baby. I love you." I smile softly at that. "I love you too, Izzy."
Then, I finally fall asleep.
---~~~---
All while that, the other tent had a very different definition of nighttime activities, which just weren't exactly sleeping.