A collection of journal entries
PLEASE READ!
There is some context you need for this story. This journal was a composition notebook they gave me on my first day at a psychiatric inpatient hospital. For the purpose of this story, I have called this hospital "Everest." I have decided to post this in order to show everyone that things can and will change.
The text may be colored to show it was written in that color in my real journal; I was only allowed marker in the hospital, not pens or pencils.
Each chapter will be one journal entry, and some of them are extremely short. For this reason, I will be posting chapters as often as possible - hopefully multiple per day (other than days where I am very busy.)
I have changed the names of everyone involved, including myself, and posted this anonymously.
This story gets extremely dark. Please read the trigger warnings as they will not be listed on each individual chapter.
TWs:
-Depression
-Anxiety
-Eating disorders
-Anorexia
-Self harm
-Suicide
-BPD (Boderline Personality Disorder)
-Lashing out
-Panic attacks
-Trauma
04/07/25
This is stupid. I want to go home. They’re not going to be able to help me anyway. Everyone else is here because they have actual problems. My life is great. I just can’t be normal and deal with shit like everyone else does. I know all these coping strategies. They don’t fucking help. I seriously need to get out of here so I can kill myself. I’m not going to get better. I’ve tried. I’m just going to live like this until I die. I want to go home.
-Avery