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Hal closed the door to the oven with a sigh. Now that the chili was in there in a big lidded pot, the bread baking alongside, he could leave it for an hour or so to cook, and all that would be left to do to finish dinner was set the table and pull it out in about an hour. Perfect time for a nap. Sleepy from the heat of the oven, he meandered out into the living room and flopped down on the couch.
“Hm, where’s the throw?” Hal asked, when his hands didn’t immediately find the lovely knitted blanket that usually lived on the couch. Shadia looked up at him from where she was doing homework at the table.
“Oh, I saw Azune come grab it maybe an hour or so ago.”
“Huh, alright.”
Something about that statement, though, prompted a prickle of unease in the back of Hal’s skull. It wasn't particularly cold out, the house was kept warm between the cooking fires in the kitchen and the hearth in the living room, and Azune had a generous pile of blankets in his room already. It was possible he just needed one more. But their nervous young houseguest was usually very reluctant to take anything that wasn't explicitly offered to him, and sometimes hesitant even then. The fact that he had been willing to come out to the living room, with Shadia there no less, and snag the blanket was unusual.
Hal generally considered himself an optimist, and he would have liked to believe that after five months of living with them Azune finally felt safe and comfortable borrowing what he liked from things that were clearly fair game. The other, perhaps more realistic side of him, though, had a harder time believing it. It seemed more likely that Azune would only have sought out the blanket if he needed it. The former child soldier – although could he really be called ‘former’ when he was still sixteen years old and waited on Hal’s words like he was expecting an order every minute? – was clearly having a hard time of it, and some days had to be worse than others. It seemed very plausible that today was one of those bad days, and he was simply desperate for any kind of comfort object. It wasn’t like he’d had any of his own, beyond that necklace he always wore, when he’d showed up on Hal's doorstep with nothing more than the clothes on his back, the sword at his belt, and Thjazi’s letter.
Despite his tiredness, Hal wanted to go check on Azune, see that everything was alright. But he was terrified that the kid might interpret that as a signal that it wasn't alright, and that he shouldn't have helped himself to the blanket. The very last thing Hal wanted to do was make Azune feel unwelcome or like his every last action was being scrutinized.
Well, they were, sort of, but it was kindly meant. From the moment Hal realized that Azune didn't have anywhere else to go, it felt like every instinct in his body turned towards figuring out as much as he could about the kid so he could convince him to stay. He watched him as closely as he watched his own kids, trying to understand as much as he could about all of them.
Looking to Shadia now, since she was the last person to have seen Azune, Hal took in her demeanor. It was entirely normal, focused and intent on her homework. She always tried to get the things she needed to do for school over and done with as soon as possible so she could relax without the work hanging over her. If she was acting normally, then Azune probably hadn’t seemed too out of the ordinary to her, and she was a good judge of things like that.
With that in mind, Hal decided he would give Azune some time. If he didn't come out for dinner, that would give him a good excuse to check in on him. In the meantime, he tried to relax and nap, but didn’t quite manage it as worries swirled in his head.
……….
A door slammed downstairs and Hero screamed and instantly Hal was on his feet and running. Not a scream like she had been hurt, no, Hal thought he probably would have rediscovered teleportation in order to get to her instantly if it had been that, but definitely a sound of utter upset. He found her standing by the door to Azune’s room, sobbing but otherwise looking okay. Immediately he scooped her up into his arms.
“Hey, hey, sweetheart, what happened?” He asked, rubbing her back as she shoved her face into his shoulder.
“Zune yelled at me,” she sobbed.
“He yelled at you?” That did not sound like their houseguest at all. Azune could be awkward with Hero, especially when she was trying to play pretend with him and he didn’t understand what she wanted from him, but he was unfailingly polite and downright protective of her. He didn’t even seem to get as frustrated as Alogar and Shadia did with her being constantly underfoot.
“I’m sorry,” came a congested sob from the other side of the door. Oh dear. “I just- she came in and I- I couldn’t get her to leave and-”
Hal could picture the scene just perfectly. Hero wasn’t quite at the age where she always remembered or respected that closed doors meant someone wanted privacy. Azune, meanwhile, had holed himself up in his room since last night, not even coming out for dinner. When Hal tried to talk to him through the door, he’d insisted that he was okay. Not that Hal took that at face value, because the boy was clearly terrified of being a burden and would have insisted he was fine and ‘didn’t need any more than what they’d already given him’ under pretty much all circumstances. Figuring out what was going on with him was made more difficult by the fact that he hadn’t been able to lay eyes on him, but he'd developed a theory as he'd fixed up a tray of food to leave outside his door. And now from the sound of Azune's voice and his reaction to Hero coming into his room, he was pretty sure he had been right.
“You were worried about her getting sick, huh?” Hal asked the door.
“Yeah,” Azune replied softly, with barely a moment of hesitation. He sounded more relieved that Hal understood and that he was getting a chance to explain himself than he should have had any reason to be. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to yell, I just-” His words broke off with a cough. On the other side of the door, he dissolved into a short fit. Hal waited, keeping an ear on whether it sounded like a truly dangerous kind of cough or just very painful and unpleasant. It wasn’t like he could trust Azune’s own assessment of himself, given that he'd been keeping his illness hidden until now.
“Hero, Azune’s not feeling very well,” Hal explained to his daughter once the coughing had faded into quiet, and Hero’s sobs had started to slow as well. “You’re right that he shouldn’t have yelled, but he’s very sorry about it. He just got scared when you came into his room because he doesn’t want you to get sick too. Sometimes it’s really hard to remember not to raise your voice when you’re upset and don't feel well, even for teenagers and grown-ups. Do you think you can accept his apology, or do you need a little while?”
“I don’t want to get sick,” Hero whined, ignoring Hal's question. Which probably meant she needed a little while to process her feelings first. He could check back in later. Sometimes he would just let things like that go if she forgot, but this felt important for both Hero and Azune to talk about.
“No, I’m sure you don’t. Neither of us want you to get sick either. That’s why Azune had his door closed, because he didn’t want you to come into his room.”
“Why not?”
“Because then you could get his germs. That’s why Azune’s been staying in his room too, so he doesn’t get germs in the rest of the house, and so he can get lots of rest so he can get better faster. Why don’t you and I go upstairs so it’s quieter and he can sleep?”
“Okay,” Hero agreed. As Hal walked down the hall with her, he heard Azune whisper through the door, his voice hoarse.
“Thank you.”
…….
“I’m sorry again for this,” Hal said, passing over Hero's bag of things. Elodie stood at the doorstep of his house. Normally he would invite her in, if she even felt she needed a welcome, but the house was a mess at the moment and he also didn’t want her to get pulled into staying long. Nor risk picking up Azune’s illness. Based on his symptoms, Hal thought Azune probably had a strain of Kahadi flu. It was an unpleasant illness, although not usually dangerous; Rungjani typically got it less bad than humans, but most people of all races that had grown up in Dol-Makjar had some acquired immunity to it. Azune wasn’t so lucky, it seemed. “I know I was supposed to have her this weekend while you prepared for that trade meeting, but with Azune so sick-”
“Hal, you don't have to apologize for asking me to look after my own daughter,” Elodie interrupted him in the tone she used for when she thought he was being very silly.
“I was actually hoping Shadia could stay with you as well.”
“Of course. And if Azune's still very sick by next weekend, let me know and I'll come help look after him so you can get a break and some rest.”
“Really?”
“Well, now I know you're already sleep deprived, because there's no way you would be asking that if you were thinking clearly.” Elodie’s voice went softer, then, as if in deference to Hal's exhausted and emotional state. “I knew when I got together and had Hero with you, that meant your family became ours. Shadia and Alogar were obviously who I was mostly thinking about, but I also knew that Hero and I would in turn become family to any other kids you had afterwards. That's not any less true because Azune came to you as a teen instead of a baby. Hero already calls him her cousin, and if you can get him to stay with you as long as I know you want, I suspect that might get upgraded to brother by the time he’s eighteen.” Even though they weren’t together anymore, Hal had had many long conversations with Elodie about the boy his brother sent to him. She was an important confidante in his life and talking with her had helped Hal clarify to himself how he wanted to help Azune.
“And even if all that wasn't the case and he wasn't family, that poor boy has clearly been through enough already,” Elodie added. “I want to help where I can.”
“You are such a wonderful woman, Elodie D'vyan. Every time I see you I'm reminded why I fell in love with you.”
“Flatterer,” she teased. “I've got the girls as long as you need, alright?”
“Alright.”
“Does Alogar want to come too?”
“No. He said he wants to stay in case he can help, and he had the flu last year and probably still has some immunity from that, so I'm inclined to let him.”
“Okay. Well, if he changes his mind, he’s always welcome. I should get going, but I’ll see you in a few of days at the latest? And you’ll send Shadia over to me when she’s done with school?”
“Exactly,” Hal agreed. “See you soon.”
…….
“Has Azune been throwing up all afternoon?” Alogar asked as Hal brought their popcorn bowl-slash-puke bucket out of Azune's room and took it to the bathroom for the third time in as many hours. His son was standing at the sink washing dishes from the soup he’d made for lunch, and after Hal had dumped out the reappearance of said soup into the toilet and given the bowl a first pass under the tap in the bathroom, Al unsqueamishly reached a hand out. Hal passed the bowl to him to wash more thoroughly.
“Off and on, yeah,” Hal sighed. “It’s not your cooking, I promise.”
Alogar huffed, as close to a laugh as felt appropriate for the situation. The house had been quiet with the girls gone and no other guests coming over, and Hal had no doubt that Al had heard some of Azune's distress. Throwing up wasn't fun under the best of circumstances, and Azune had it worse than most. It was hard to tell where the heaving stopped and the sobbing began. Halfway through the afternoon, he had finally started letting Hal rub his back to comfort him afterwards without arguing about whether he deserved it. Hal wished he could take that as a good thing, rather than just another sign of how upset he was.
“Anything I can do to help?” Alogar asked.
“Kind of you to offer, but I don't think Azune would want you seeing him like this. But if you could think up anything to keep him from getting horrifically bored, that could be helpful.”
Azune could probably use some distraction from how bad he felt, but Hal couldn't figure out what might work. Reading Kahadi was still challenging enough for the kid that doing so while exhausted and fever-addled wasn't an option, and there was only so much being read to that a teenager could tolerate before their pride startled to rankle. The things that seemed to be Azune’s favorite pastimes, mostly cooking and walking around the city, were obviously not available to him at the moment. And while he seemed like the kind of guy who might like an activity like sketching or knitting, he was too tired to learn new things at the moment, and Hal wasn't a good person to teach him those anyway. Maybe Elodie could do so once he was recovering.
“Something he could do in bed?” Alogar clarified, and Hal nodded. “Hm. I guess pottery and painting are out, then. Don't worry, though, I'll think of something.”
“Thank you. And thank you again for cooking and washing up. It's been a big help.”
“Of course, Dad. I'm not as obsessive about it as Azune is, but I like to help too. Plus, it feels like the least I can do after he's taken on half my chores.” He wasn’t exaggerating. From the first week he stayed with them, Azune seemed desperate to pull more than his fair share instead of being treated like a guest, and Hal had eventually caved and added him to the chore schedule in the hopes that that would make him feel more like part of the household and convince him to stay instead of bolting. Even with the list of who was supposed to do what, however, he often caught Azune taking on the other kids’ tasks as well.
Hal rolled his eyes at Alogar, who was behaving exactly as a teenager should, but secretly he was very proud. His kid had a very good sense of when to wiggle out of his responsibilities and push the boundaries, but also when to buckle down and do his duty helping people. Hopefully Azune could learn some of that balance from him.
…….
Hal barely made it to the kitchen before collapsing into heaving breaths that weren't quite sobs but still had tears pooling in his eyes. He didn’t want either of the boys to see him crying, because he knew that seeing a parent or parental figure upset could be very upsetting, and he didn’t want them to think anything was worse than it was.
Not that things were good. Azune’s fever was spiking, he hadn’t been able to keep anything down for two days, and, he panicked when left alone, so either Hal or Alogar had to sit with him all day and night. Worst of all, he had finally done what Hal had feared he would: refused to keep trying to eat. He claimed it was a waste of food when he knew he was just going to throw it back up again, and all of Hal's cajoling hadn't been able to persuade him otherwise. Maybe if they were lucky, he would forget the entire argument in a few hours and let Hal try to get some sweet ginger tea and bland crackers into him.
But Hal wasn’t hopeful about that. That conversation had been the only time today that Azune was fully coherent. The rest of the time he’d been confused and upset if not fully delirious, but of course he pulled it together for the exact wrong moment. And none of his symptoms would be helped by refusing to eat. Maybe his stubbornness would abate as he got progressively weaker, but Hal wasn’t willing to test that theory.
Kahadi fever was not something one usually called a healer for, as there was little they could do short of proper healing spells and those tended to be reserved for more serious illnesses and injuries. Healing was a rare skill in their day and age, moreso even than most magics, and Dol-Makjar had few enough healers to go around. Still, Hal was prepared to call in a favor and have one come help Azune if he got any worse. He was already doing everything he could with the tinctures and cures Thaisha always made sure the house was stocked with, but they were of limited effect when Azune couldn't keep them down. And might now refuse outright to try.
After allowing himself five minutes for a breakdown borne of fear and exhaustion and frustration, Hal sighed, stood up, and walked to the stove. He put a kettle on to boil. Dehydration would hurt Azune far faster than lack of food, and with water not being exactly a limited resource in Dol-Makjar, he had less reason to object to ‘wasting it.’ And hopefully he wouldn't notice if Hal snuck as much sugar into it as would dissolve, trying desperately to keep his strength up.
…….
“Kiddo, you don’t have to work on that every minute,” Hal reminded Azune as he sat at the kitchen table, working more than eating despite the plate of mild cheese and crackers set out for him. He had an old moth-eaten blanket on his lap and was steadily unraveling it from one side to the other and back again. Alogar had found the ratty old thing in the attic, too full of holes to even be worth mending, and suggested that taking it apart might help keep Azune occupied, and let him feel useful. The yarn could be knit back into something else, after all.
By the time Al had thought of it, though, the other teen had been too sick even for that. It took four exhausting days, but finally his fever broke. Only once he'd kept down two ‘meals’ of sweet tea and toast and was strong enough to sit up under his own power did Hal give him the blanket to work on. It had done its job quieting his embarrassed apologies and heart-wrenching thank-yous, things Hal didn't want to hear, but now he wished he'd waited a little. The kid had dove into the project even to the detriment of resting and eating. Which he really should have expected. A week of inactivity was enough to make anyone feel a little bored and useless, and those seemed to be feelings Azune couldn’t tolerate.
The kid, of course, took the gentle reminder as an order, and set the blanket down. He didn't immediately reach for the cheese and crackers, though.
“How's your tummy feeling?” Hal asked. The fact that Azune had been willing to eat at all told him he was probably not feeling like he was going to throw up again, and even that he might have been hungry, but that didn't mean his stomach wasn't still hurting.
“Much better,” Azune said.
“Good. I'm very happy to hear you're feeling better, kiddo.”
For some reason, though, this statement made Azune's back straighten as his body went tense.
“I'm not sure you want me cooking yet, sir, but I can start doing the dishes again. Thank you for letting me stay even when I couldn't be useful.”
Hal's heart broke. This kid. Fuck.
“Azune.” Hal put a hand on his shoulder, and apparently despite himself, the kid leaned into the touch even as he flinched. It was a far cry from how he'd clung to Hal when he was in the depths of his fever, begging not to be left behind again. “I'm happy you're feeling better because I care about you, not because I want you to be able to do chores again. And let me get something straight here. Your welcomeness here is not ever dependent on your ability to be useful. Sick or well, working or resting, you always have a place in my home and at my table. As long as I'm here, you can always stay, as long as you want. And I'm not going anywhere.”
There was a long silence before Azune spoke. His shoulder was utterly still beneath Hal's hand, as if frozen in shock. Even after Azune said, “Okay. Thank you,” Hal knew he hadn't really processed it. Well. He would just have to tell him again, in words and actions. But at least with that said, Azune reached for a cracker. He chewed it slowly and carefully, swallowed heavily, and went back to work on the blanket.