Archive of Our Own

"Dean. You need to stop dressing as a priest on cases. It's blasphemy." Cas muttered once they got out of the car.

Dean laughed. "Really?" He said with a playful smile. "If it's so bad Cas, you can take it off me yourself." He said giving Cas a wink.

Cas was about to reply but Dean had already straighted up, fixing his collar and was making his way to the front door of their witness.

"Give me strength." Is all he could manage before following.

Dean knocked on the door and coughed into his wrist to try and get into character before the door opened.

It was a small women with blonde hair and red rimmed eyes. She held the door with one hand and a tissue to her nose with the other.

Dean switched his face from focused and tense to sympathetic and soft. His eyes softening almost immediately. He didn't even need to act. He saw the pain of this woman, but they needed to get information. So to be safe he'd play it up a bit.

"Mrs. Walters?" He spoke, inquiring.

Her throat bobbed as she swallowed. "Ms." She spoke softly.

He didn't mean for that to happen, "Of course, I apologise." He said putting a hand to his chest.

"My name is Father Ringo, and this is my dear friend Father Holliday. Excuse him for being out of uniform, I asked him to come along with me today, to provide comfort and possibly some answers for you." He gave her a charming smile, albeit small and still sympathetic.

"Thank you Fathers, very much. Please, come in." She said, standing to the side and pulling the door open wider do they could walk through.

Cas cocked his head both left and right as they stepped in, scoping out a widowed woman's home like she was a murderer. That could still be true.

"I, again, thank you for coming but I don't feel that I'll be the one you will have to focus on." She led them to her living room where she invited them to sit. Cas stood near the entrance while Dean sat.

"My son has been taking this extremely hard. He is not himself, I've been trying to get him to talk to me but he- he shuts me out." Tears were slowly rolling down her face as she spoke.

Cas glanced at Dean before he started, as if to say 'that sounded strange, remember that!', "Ms. Walters, I assure you we are here for whatever it is that you may need-

Dean cut him off mid sentence, "And we'd be more than happy to talk with both you and your son." He smiled again.

She mirrored his expression although she was more solemn.
"Excuse me, do you mind if I use your restroom?" Dean asked after a beat. The outline of his EMF stuck out against his thigh.

Ms. Walters cleared her throat. "Of course, Father. It's down the hall and second door to the left."

Dean gave her a nod before turning away and walking a few steps down the hall before pulling out his device.

"Would you mind if I asked you a few questions regarding your husband?" Cas asked gently. He knew he was no Saint himself but it didn't feel overly wrong for him to be acting as a priest. Dean on the other hand..

He could get with the lying and everything they did that was illegal, it was needed, they were basically saving the world. So what if they broke into a couple of peoples homes to catch ghosts every now and then? They were hunters.

But he couldn't get over the feeling of annoyance when they dressed as people preaching of his life, his past, his present and even his future. Although he wasn't fully aligned with it he felt it unnecessary for them to ever need to be priests, FBI agents weren't enough?

"U-uhm sure? I mean I don't see why not." She said dabbing her cheek.

Cas decided to just get his awkward and weird questions over with, there was no way to sugarcoat it. "Did you happen yo notice anything weird in the days before your husbands death? Any cold spots in the house? Sounds you couldn't explain? Smells?"

She looked at him perplexed. "No.. no I don't believe I did. Why do you ask Father?"

Cas cleared his throat, something he did not need to do. "I ask these questions to many of those who have lost a loved one due to an untimely death. It helps people to think back to the time before anything had happened and to think about small things that may not have seemed as though they were of import, but may have been to you." He came up with some bullshit reason and hoped Dean would be back so he could shut up.

He liked to talk now more than ever before but he was always afraid he'd mess something up so he hardly spoke more than he had to in public.

He'd talk Dean's ear off when he felt like it, other times he'd kind of just hover around the place.

___________

Dean held the EMF reader at just under his arms length, surveying the empty space as he stepped down the hall.

So far nothing had pinged. He was starting to think there really wasn't anything going on. It stayed at the lowest metre. He kept going.

He could hear Cas and the homeowner talking, he wouldn't have too much longer before he'd have to get back so he ventured on.

He got to the very end of the hall and saw that there was a door left slightly ajar, unlike all the others. He nudged it with his shoulder and stepped inside.

There were pages scattered around, a few on the floor but mostly on the bed and desk. He couldn't make out what they were supposed to be saying but he didn't think that was very promising. Creepy. He thought.

He cocked his head to the left to see an unchecked corner. His eyes locked on a hooded figure, crouched down and staring into the wall.

"Kid?" Dean called, quickly stowing his EMF back in his pocket.

He turned his head ever so slightly to look at Dean. He put up his hand and gave him a small wave.

"Do you mind if we have a little chat.." He stalled waiting for a name.

"Todd." He said without missing a beat.

"Todd." Dean smiled. "Would you mind if we talked for a moment?"

He gave a shrug and got up to sit on his bed. Dean did the same.

"You're mom's a little worried about you. You and your dad were close?" He enquired.

Todd looked at him strangely. "Not particularly." He said coldly.

Dean was starting to get bad vibes from this kid.

"I'm very sorry for your loss either way. Your father was a good man."

Todd stared daggers into him. "If you say so."

"What makes you say that?" Dean was familiar with the hate of a father. He knew exactly what Todd was saying.

"My father was evil. Last time I saw him alive he told me that I was insane, demonic." He confessed. Then almost as quite as a whisper, he muttered, "I showed him."

Dean's eyes widened. Maybe he didn't know exactly what Todd was saying. Sure he'd hated his old man, John Winchesters parenting was anything but normal. But to go as far as kill him. Dean had thought about it but that was mainly just a joke. Either way, he'd never expected the outcome of this hunt to be anything other than stopping something supernatural.

"I don't need to be fixed..." He started.

Dean tried to stay calm. "Fixed?"

Todd looked at him. He didn't say a word until he was finished surveying Dean's entire person.

Dean felt that if he kept his eyes on him any longer that he'd explode from the pressure.

Until finally, "Isn't it a sin to lie father?"

Dean got goosebumps. This kid was scary.

"What happened to your father Todd?" Dean started, getting up from sitting.

Todd looked at him wildly. "He tried to fix me. Just like you and your partner." He lunged at Dean with a blade locked firmly in his fist.

Dean grabbed his arm and tore it away from his direction, giving himself some time.

He heard footsteps coming down the hall. Two sets.

"Todd honey?" Ms. Walters called.

Dean and Todd looked at eachother and Todd once again lunged for Dean.

He came too fast and too strong because he wasn't able to deflect it in time and it caught him in the shoulder.

Dean Stumbled back from the impact just as the door swung open.

Ms. Walters' eyes went wide as she covered her mouth with both hands. "Todd!"

Cas stepped inside, "Call the police." Todd was about to make a move but went still when Cas loomed over him and his eyes glowed blue.

"T-they're on their way." She said holding the phone to her chest with both hands. Tears streamed down her face.

"Todd. What have you done." She cried.

"It's alright ma'am, its okay." Dean soothed from where he stood.

They heard the sirens getting closer and that's when Cas stepped back.

The whole arresting process went oddly smooth.

Todd didn't resist as he was placed into handcuffs. He seemed to be at peace with being arrested.

Dean's heart couldn't help but ache. He had more than a guess of why he'd killed his father. The house alone felt suffocating to Dean, crosses everywhere, pictures of Jesus. The kid needed an out.

"Are you alright?" Cas asked once Todd was finally in handcuffs.

"Yeah. Just a little shocked. Never thought the kid would pull a knife on me, y'know?" He said, holding the area around the blade, his thoughts snapping back into place when he'd remembered.

Cas flicked his head around and grabbed a cloth that was left on a table. He pressed it against Dean's shoulder, underneath the blade.

Dean hissed a breath, "Cas.."

"We should go. This has all been... not our kind of thing. Yes?" Cas said, walking both of them out the front door.

"You could say that again."

"Fathers." A man outside said to them.

"Hello Seargent." Cas responded, still holding the cloth to Dean's shoulder.

"Mind if I get a statement from either of you? And you should really get that looked after Father." He said, noticing Dean's injury.

"It's quite alright sir. We'll drive to the hospital now. And we'll call you for our statement afterwards?" Cas tried.

The Seargent mulled it over. "That should be okay.. just make sure you get around to calling us."

"Of course. Thank you officer." Cas walked Dean over to the car and pushed him towards the passengers side while he rounded the vehicle and got in the drivers side.

"Just a second Dean." He said reversing out.

__________________

"God! It feels like it hit the bone." Dean groaned when he shuffled out of the car and over to the motel room door.

Cas unlocked it making Dean almost fall forwards but Cas caught him. "Sit down and I'll help you in a moment."

Dean nodded, sitting down heavily on the bed. He'd definitely had worse before but his shoulder was always sore.

Cas shrugged his trench-coat off and dumped it on the table before walking over to Dean.

He grimaced putting a hand on his shoulder attempting to do anything to make the feeling more comfortable.

Cas rolled his eyes at him. He was pissed at him for making them do this. If they'd waited and did slightly more research, then they would've known it wasn't their thing.

"What's that for?" He asked noticing Cas being annoyed to the max.

He looked at him sternly and sighed. "I just can't help but feel this is a sign that neither you or Sam should not wear those clothes again."

Dean scoffed, "You cannot seriously tell me that you think I got stabbed by a, clearly struggling kid, because I'm wearing church shoes and a rosary." He said using his hands in the most exaggerated way, causing him to wince as his arm tugged his shoulder.

"Dean." Cas said stepping forward.

Dean curled in on himself a little shrinking as he put a hand up in Cas' direction. "Don't, m'fine."

He waited until the pain had subsided and straightened up slowly.

If Cas wasn't angry at that man before, he sure was now.

Dean had risen with the bitchiest smirk he could muster and- wait. Was he... laughing?

"What could you possibly think is funny?" He complained.

He was laughing more visibly now, his eyes shut as he giggled over absolutely nothing.

If it didn't make Cas so angry, he'd think it endearing. But he was pissed.

"If this outfit is the reason for that poor kid to knife me, why doesn't it just take me out itself." He snorted. He couldnt stop thinking about him.

Cas tilted his head to the side in confusion. "What?"

"Don't worry. I'll help it out." He said making as earnest of a face he could muster. He then grabbed the rosary beads sitting around his neck and held them above his head in a hanging motion. He thought about how unserious this entire thing was.

Cas turned a mixture of livid and disappointed, just when he thought Dean had matured.

"Dean. Stop that immediately, that's not what I meant." He said stepping closer. All bark no bite so far.

Dean stepped back again, keeping the distance between them. "No, no Cas, its working trust me. I can feel JC about to take the reigns." He mocked, continuing the choking motion.

Cas had enough. He strode over to Dean faster than anticipated and grabbed the length of beads, just above where Dean was already holding.

Dean instinctively let go allowing Cas' grip to tug him forward. He stumbled a couple steps closer and his head and neck were stiffly in the position where he was now a short distance away from Cas' face.

He looked into his eyes trying to gauge if Cas was actually angry at him and if he was going to get smited or they would just let it go and pretend nothing happened. It was hard to tell. He could hardly ever read Cas.

Instead they just stared at eachother. Dean's cheeks had adopted a rosy glow as soon as they came into that position, his heartbeat was irregular, occasionally skipping a beat.

Cas' brow furrowed unnoticed to Dean. It wasn't his fault that the guys lips were right in his eye line. He switched nervously between looking at Cas' lips and his eyes.

On a normal day Dean could hardly look at Cas without getting a little flustered. His eyes were so, unbelievably gorgeous. Now he was stuck in a full blown analyse of his best friends eye balls, which seemed to be staring into his soul. Maybe they were.

Cas looked at him the same way he would any day but this time he felt his face start to heat up.

"Cas.. I uh-

"Stop it." Cas subconsciously moved his head closer to Dean's. Attempting to be intimidating.

He'd always do it when Dean was pissing him off, and sometimes he'd think it'd work but it was just Dean getting flustered of how close he was.

This time Cas looked at Dean's lips. He couldn't not.

Dean noticed.

He tilted his head ever so slightly and Dean for sure thought he was going to kiss him.

His brain short circuited and he jerked his head back ever so slightly.

Dean's heart was racing. What the hell was happening?

Cas glanced around, "You're still bleeding.." He awkwardly let go of Dean's rosary beads and turned to get some bandages from Dean's duffle.

Dean rubbed the back of his neck as he waited. A part if him wanted Cas to come back over and kiss him till the sun went down but that would be... insane. That was wrong.. He'd almost forgotten that he'd been stabbed.

Cas turned to him holding the white fabric. He placed a hand on Deans shoulder and gently pushed him down to sit on the bed.

Cas pulled a chair over and sat infront of Dean. He tore a packet of antiseptic wipes open and placed them on the bed.

"I'm going to cut this off you rather than take the blade out first." He said angling the random pair of scissors he'd pulled out to the edge of Dean's button up.

"You could just.. pull it out? I mean I've had worse. Sam and me.. never did nothing fancy, just.. dealt with it." He explained feeling a little embarrassed. Not about Cas cutting his shirt off, but the tension in the room plus Cas taking care of him like that.

Cas looked at him oddly. "Dean." He sighed continuing his cutting, "I'd like to do this properly. I don't want to bandage you up carelessly as if you were some animal and while it may not make a difference to you if I tear the blade out through your shirt or not, it makes a difference to me." Cas just wanted him to feel cared for, and he'd have to take his shirt off anyway, it was genuinely easier to just cut it off now than try to take it off later.

Dean's heart ached. He felt bad for making Cas worry and care of him. But there was a six inch blade in his shoulder so whatever Cas wanted.

Cas peeled away his shirt and Dean let out a small wince as the bloodsoaked fabric became unstuck from his skin.

"I could just heal you? It would make this much easier on both of our behaves."

"No, no. Save your mojo. This is tiny, I'll be fine. Just.. get it out." Dean said firmly but caring at the same time. The more he thought about it the dizzier he felt.

"Alright." Cas secured one hand around the hilt and the other braced on Deans unaffected shoulder.

Dean screwed his eyes shut in pain and sucked in a breath.

"Ready?" Cas wavered.

Dean nodded sharply.

"On three. One.. two-" He tore the blade from Dean's flesh, allowing blood to flow more freely now.

Dean yelped in pain bringing a hand up to cover his face out of habit. Cas moved his hand from Dean's shoulder to snaking up the side of his face, comforting his jaw.

Cas immediately pushed the gauze overtop the wound staunching the bloodflow.

"Sorry." He whispered earnestly.

Dean took the arm off his face, the pain still sharp, and placed it gently ontop of where Cas' hand met his skin.

"Thanks angel." He said giving Cas about as warm of a smile as he could.

Cas reciprocated but hastily moved to dig through their medical supplies to find sutures.

He pulled the gauze up and decided the bleeding had mostly stopped and moved to start stitching him up.

Dean hated stitches. He'd rather hold the skin together himself until it healed. Despite that, he knew Cas would be gentle with him and that gave him a little bit of confidence.

He stopped him anyway, just as Cas' hand was making its way towards him.

He looked at him confused, "Dean?"

"Y'know.. when I said you could take this off of me yourself, 'this', isn't exactly what I'd meant." He said playfully.

"Dean. I need to stitch you up." He said ignoring him.

Dean didn't like that response, but relented anyway.

Dean let go and leant his head back to give Cas a clear work space of his body and so he wouldn't have to look.

He, finally, began stitching Dean up. His fingers moving with practised precision making neat rows of thread along Dean's skin. It was.. heavenly. Dean could hardly feel the needle going through his skin. It seemed that Cas just so happened to be good at giving people sutures.

He watched as Cas finished up with the very last one and smoothly pulled the needle out.

"You're so gentle with me angel." He said sweetly. Looking at Cas with half-closed, lazy eyes.

If Cas was a angry with him before it was dissipating at a steady rate. Dean ticked him off sometimes, sure. He wasn't the friendliest guy sometimes but Cas thought he was the sweetest thing next honey.

Dean was about to grab the scissors and cut the leftover thread off when Cas leant in and severed the string with his teeth.

Dean just stared at him for a second. His mouth just slightly agape.

Cas looked at him confused. "What's wrong?"

"N-nothin'." Dean said trying to build up a little confidence. He breathed in deeply but quietly trying to be subtle.

"There." Cas said gathering up some of their supplies and dropping it back in the bag.

Then he just went for it.

Cas was mid-getting up from his seat when Dean leant forward, rising slightly himself and finally just kissed him.

Cas looked surprised, keeping his eyes opened and small as he searched through everything that told him this was wrong.

He couldn't think of a good enough reason.

Dean pulled himself back, the kiss had been extremely rushed and abrupt. "Sorry. I'm sorry just forget that.. please."

Dean's face was turning red with embarrassment. He turned so he wouldn't have to look at Cas.

"You don't have to be sorry Dean. It's alright." Cas explained. A little flustered but also confused.

Dean wouldn't look at him. "Dean?"

Cas looked at him, his head turned ever so slightly at an angle.

He glanced at Cas with worried eyes.

"Dean what's wrong?" Cas said turning Dean's body so he'd face him.

"I don't know what I was thinking, I think it's just the bloodloss. Or somethin'.. sorry." He looked down at his feet. He felt like such an idiot.

Next thing he felt was Cas' hand cupping the side of his face. Dean physically couldn't stop himself from leaning into the touch, letting Cas hold him. He caught himself and pulled up a little, Cas' hand followed him.

"What're you doing man?" He asked quietly. His hand was cold but it was a welcome change from the violent hands he'd so usually encounter.

"Checking your body temperature." Cas made a 'hm' sound before continuing, "It seems alright, but your heart rate is.. irregular. Are you sure you're okay Dean?"

"I said I'm fine. Would you quit worrying." He said, sounding a little angry but with no real bite.

"Alright Dean." He said finally. His hand strayed from Dean's face and lightly ghosted over the wound he'd just closed.

Deans eyes snapped open watching Cas. "Don't go using your grace on me now Cas." He warned.

"It will take quite a while to heal if I don't, it won't take much grace-

"Don't Cas. I'll be fine." He repeated.

"Dean. Let me." Cas commanded. He really wanted to heal him but knew that if Dean didn't agree he'd be angry with him.

"Save your grace. Please." He replied with a tone of finality.

Cas sighed, "You should sleep then, and let me put your arm in a sling."

Dean rolled his eyes but didn't object, he fell back on the bed while he waited for Cas to get some gauze out of the medical bag to act as a sling.

He hadn't realised how tired he was until right then, his shoulder still hurt like a bitch and he felt cold. Plus the fact that he'd embarrassed himself for three consecutive life sentences when he kissed Cas.

Cas tipped his knee with his finger and sat in the chair facing his bed once again.

Dean gathered enough strength to push himself up about halfway, Cas pulling him up the rest of it.

Cas wrapped the gauze around Dean as carefully as he could manage. He looked at Dean and frowned.

"I'll get you some new clothes, there's blood all over your pants." He mumbled.

Cas pulled some clothes out of the duffle and Dean dug through the bag, finding a packet of wipes which he pulled out and began wiping the sticky traces of blood that coated his chest and stomach.

Cas watched him for a moment, struggling to see if he'd gotten it all before he took the wipe from Dean and got rid of the rest of it.

Dean watched as he gently stroked the wipe over his skin. He just couldn't stop looking at Cas.

"Cas?" He practically whispered as he eyed him.

"Yes?" He answered not looking up from what he was doing.

"Do you think that kid's gonna be okay?"

"I believe so.. Why do you ask?"

"I mean even after prison and stuff.. like what about heaven?"

"Other than killing his father I don't believe he's done anything irredeemable, he should be fine." He looked at Dean, confused.

"Okay.. that's good." Dean breathed. Cas could tell there was something up.

"If this is about what happened earlier, the belief that homosexuality is wrong is completely false. We have more important things to police than who people love."

"What does that have to do with earlier?" Dean asked, his eyes piercing through Cas.

"It's okay Dean. There's no reason to be ashamed, if you'd like to talk, you can or we can just forget about it. I don't mind. I just don't want you to keep worrying about that young man. I can tell you're upset about his situation." Cas offered warmly.

"I'm not ashamed about anything. I just, know how it feels for a father to be so controlling. Feeling that he needs to fix his son." He explained.

"John was not always the most accepting of you. You shouldn't live by his means anymore Dean. You're allowed to do what you want."

Dean felt the weight of Cas' words in his chest. They weighed down his heart and made it feel like he couldn't breathe. He was suffocating and the only way he could release the pressure was to cry. God he was so weak.

A tear rolled down his face. A singular perfect tear, fell and landed on his blood soaked pants that he still hadn't changed out of. That's when Cas noticed.

"Hey. Dean. You're okay." He soothed. A hand immediately going to Dean's.

A few more tears fell, Dean's throat bobbing up and down as he tried to wipe them away.

Cas, knowing he needed to do something, reached his other hand out to Dean's face. He mirrored the position of were he'd placed it earlier and cupped the other side of Dean's face. Cas loved him. But didn't want to ever manipulate Dean into doing anything he wasn't comfortable with, especially because he didn't fully know their situation.

"You are so very perfect Dean. I'd like to say I know you inside and out, I'd know better than anyone how perfect you truly are. John Winchesters and anybody else's bigoted opinions are merely just opinions. There is no truth to their words. But there is truth to mine." He gently pulled his face up to look at him. Dean put a hand over where Cas' touched him as his lip quivered, he slowly opened his eyes.

"Cas.. you're just saying that. I know I freaked you out earlier. L'ts just stop." He mumbled.

"I'm not sure i have the capacity to be freaked out. I meant what i said." He leant in holding the eye contact with Dean. He had to make him believe in what he was saying.

"I think you're perfect Dean Winchester." Cas put a hand to the back of Dean's head and pressed a kiss right between his eyebrows.

The kiss was quick and Cas tried to pull away slowly, not wanting to make Dean feel as though he had to reciprocate but Dean kept him there and leant his head against Cas'.

"Always so sweet to me angel." Dean brushed his nose against Cas'. He glanced at his lips but didn't make a move to do anything.

Cas waited patiently to see what Dean was wanting to do.

"Kiss me?" He asked, trying to sound as relaxed as possible even though his voice shook.

Cas didn't say a word just mindlessly stroked his thumb up and down his cheek as he kissed him.

This time it was soft and slow. Scary, but deep down he knew it was safe. Cas was safe.

It felt beatific to have Cas take the reigns especially on something that Dean wasn't particularly accustomed to. He was practically jumping out of his skin when he asked Cas to kiss him.

Dean couldn't help but think back to the one true instance where he'd had a similar experience. Lee Webb. God he was young.

He was only with Lee for a short amount of time, and they weren't 'together', together. Sure they'd kissed a few times, but it didn't matter when John had basically caught them red handed.

They weren't even doing anything, Lee just had his hands on Deans face and was speaking to him in that soft way he'd only get with Dean. He was just reassuring Dean about something that was bothering him. Either way he didn't take Lee on hunts after that. Then maybe around a week or two later John sent Dean to deal with the nuns for his birthday. He'd 'fixed' him.

But Dean wasn't broken to begin with.

He lifted a hand to hold onto Castiel as the kiss deepened, moving it from the back of his head to his chest. Dean's tongue starting to work its way into Cas' mouth.

 

Cas attempted to reciprocate at Dean's level but delayed his reactions to allow Dean to have more control and not be pressured into it.

Dean just continued kissing him. Cas had brought both hands down to Dean's shoulders then slowly moved them up to where they held the sides of Dean's head while he kissed him.

They stayed like that for a while, mindlessly loving one another. Dean slowly let his mind wander and just thought of how perfect this moment felt after so long of shying away from the love he felt.

Dean wanted more. Wanted to try atleast.

Dean held Cas' hand that was pressed to one side of his head then from there trailed his fingers down his forearm making his way to Cas' white button up.

He first tried pulling it open but realised it was harder than he'd thought with one hand, so, Cas helped him out, bringing a hand down to tear open the buttons without breaking their kiss.

He shed his shirt and moved to hold Dean even tighter than before, his hands going around his body. Cas broke away from Dean's mouth but kissed down his neck, gently sucking the skin there, which made Dean call out to him.

"Cas-" He breathed. He felt like he was on fire, everything was getting so very warm and Dean's body was heating up.

Cas pulled back slowly, the skin from Dean's neck still sitting between his lips until he released it with a soft smacking sound as he pulled back enough to look at Dean once more.

Dean didn't even know what to do with himself, he wanted more but had no idea on Earth on how to articulate that without sounding so insanely needy or that he was begging for Cas.

So all he came up with was glancing down at Cas' belt and giving it a small tug.

Cas looked down at his hand on his belt, then back to Dean's face trying to decipher if he actually wanted this.

"Dean. Are you sure? I don't want you to feel as though you have to do anything." Cas reassured, trying to sound comforting with a voice still so low and gruff.

Dean didn't even answer him, just pulled his belt again. This time more insistent. Telling Cas that he was sure.

Cas squinted his eyes at him for a moment before giving him a small smile and obliging.

He stood from his chair and worked his belt open, sliding it out of the loops on his pants and setting it aside on the night stand.

Dean watched him undress still sitting on the edge of the bed. He could feel himself getting even hotter in a way he was so unfamiliar with, it almost felt uncomfortable. He searched his mind for the word uncomfortable to ever light up whenever thinking about Cas and couldn't find it. He was just nervous.

Cas eyed Dean and walked back over to him. He stood between Dean's spread out knees and cupped his face again. A gesture Dean savoured every time Cas did it.

He leant into the touch still looking into Cas' eyes when cas took his hand away and put both hands on Deans knees.

Dean understood what he was trying to do a little slower than he'd like to admit but when he did he raised his feet off of the ground and let Cas pull his legs up and pushing him back on the bed.

He pushed Dean up the bed until his head was hovering over the off white pillows that were featured in too many motel rooms around the country, and knelt in front of him; still holding his legs.

Dean couldn't take his eyes off him. He knew what he was feeling was arousal but he couldn't tell if there was still nervousness splashed in, that was making him feel that way or not. There probably was.

"Do you want me to stop?" Cas asked brushing Dean's knee.

Dean swallowed hard, still staring into Cas' eyes but now more aware that he was doing so.

"Not at all." He said after a beat of silence. Still staring blankly at Cas.

 

Cas reached up to Dean's belt and undid it, prompting Dean to lift his hips so Cas could take it off.

He placed it on the bedside table next to his and leant in even closer to pull off Dean's pants.

He hooked his fingers in the waistband and gently pulled until they started sliding down, getting disrupted around Dean's lower thigh. He helped Cas out by pushing them down just enough so they'd go the rest of the way.

Cas dropped them on the chair, still close to the bed and returned, kissing Dean as he got on the bed.

He kissed him lazily holding his face in his hand and Dean gently clutching the hair on the back of Cas' head. Threading his fingers through the soft tufts, he experimentally pulled it lightly every once in a while when Cas would use his tongue.

After some time Cas broke away from Dean's mouth and scattered kisses all over his jaw and neck, suckling a few dark spots whenever he found a spot where Dean seemed to be tender. To which Dean would let out a whine or a slight giggle depending on how hard Cas went.

He journeyed down to his collarbones giving then the same treatment of peppered kisses, save for hickies. He brushed over them quite quickly and made his way to Dean's chest, which was mostly covered by his sling but Cas worked around that fact.

He layed soft kisses over Dean's pecs, moving aside the thin gauze. He made sure not to do too much, but just enough to show Dean how much he truly loved, every, last, bit of him.

He caught Dean staring at him as he continued his descent. Lower and lower.

Cas couldn't help but give him a smirk as he licked down Dean's stomach, sliding his tongue over the soft ridges that were part of Dean's toned torso. He was fit though he didn't have any abs, the man ate like a horse. But that didn't deter Cas. He liked Dean any way, eminently when he was underneath him.

He brushed his lips against the waistband of Dean's boxers and nuzzled his nose and mouth in the subtle 'V' shape that Dean had connecting to his lower half.

Dean let out a sigh that sounded as though he'd been holding it in for ages. His eyes flicked shut for a moment as he rested his head on his pillow, but quickly returned to his previous position when Cas lifted the leg of his boxers and places a tender kiss to the inside of Dean's thigh.

He shuddered, moving his hand from Cas' hair to the side of his face. Cas looked at him with heavy, hooded eyes and took his lips from Dean's thigh to Dean's palm. He kissed it softly then brought his hand to palm his own growing erection just infront of Cas' face.

Cas was way more into this than he thought he'd be. Which was surprising because he'd always been, 'into' Dean but hadn't thought so much on this part of the deal.

"Cas.." He fussed, giving Cas a pleading and forlorn look. Sure he was a little scared to go this far with Cas bit he was practically teasing him at this point and he was getting ansty.

Cas seemed to get the message. He arched his fingers into his waistband and pulled them off of him.

Dean shifted, suddenly feeling a little insecure at his sudden exposure.

Castiel did the same and removed his own underwear, giving Dean a second to relax.

Dean couldn't help but stare at Cas, forgetting about himself. He felt himself twitch as Cas leant down once again.

Cas kissed just below Dean's navel then slowly dragged his tongue down until he met Dean's shaft. He guided it up Dean's erection until he got to the tip. He ran his tongue around the edge of it then passed over the slit which made Dean's breath hitch.

Cas noticed immediately and brought his tongue back to Dean's slit where he let it flit around ontop of Dean's head.

Dean let out another deep breath and before he could say anything, Cas slid his lips over Dean's tip and took his whole head in his mouth. His lips pressed against his shaft as he held his head in his mouth, just petting it with his tongue.

Dean threw his head back again and this time left it on the pillow. The pleasure of Cas sliding his perfect lips over his head felt... extraordinary.

He was just about to ask Cas if they could go further, taking his hand out of Cas' hair and bringing it to himself–his forearm resting over his forehead–when Cas moved his head so that he could taste all of Dean. And all of Dean he did taste because when he stopped moving Dean could feel his nose resting on his pubic bone.

Dean let out a startled gasp mixed with a whine, not being able to control his body. His hand flew down to Cas again, his body acting on impulse from the new wave of pleasure.

Cas wiggled his mouth a little, letting his tip brush the back of his throat before moving his head back up to where Dean thought he'd stop but Cas went back down on Dean, swallowing his dick smoothly and repeating that process, over and over.

"Holy-" Dean squirmed under his hold, brewthly heavily and trying his absolute best not to buck his hips up into Cas' throat so he could fuck his face. His other partners normally didn't mind that because it was the heat of the moment and whatnot, but Cas was different. This session was slow and filled with the most love Dean's every known. It felt violent to do that to Cas. Besides, he was the one being fucked in this situation.

Cas kept going, bobbing his head up and down on Dean while he continued to squirm. He jerked his hand down to a new position and Cas grabbed it in his own, holding on tight and giving him a reassuring squeeze, which he mimicked with his lips so that Dean had the pleasure of feeling the repetition of his message.

Cas continued until he felt warm lines of fluid slip down his throat as he blew Dean. It tasted like nothing Cas had every had before but he could identify precum and made sure to ease off of Dean slowly as he suckled it down.

He moved his mouth up slowly and left Dean's dick with a small popping sound as he swallowed the last of his treat.

"Cas- t-that was.. Wow." He breathed out.

"Is it supposed to taste salty?" Cas asked him. Genuinely curious.

Dean's cheeks reddened more than they already were which seemed impossible.

"I uh.. don' know myself. People always say mine does." He said awkwardly, just lifting his head enough to see Cas' reaction.

He bent down a final time and kissed the side of Dean's dick, "You taste wonderful."

Dean wasn't used to see being this soft and tender. He was normally just jerked around until his partner was bored. He normally went into it hoping for something atleast a little gently, but almost every woman would just use him for their own high. It didn't–not feel good but he always finished longing for something more.

Part of him wanted to stop now just incase this experience turned into that but another part of him wanted to feel Cas so bad.

"Would you like me to continue?" Cas wondered earnestly. His blue eyes searching Dean's.

Dean's mouth almost didn't open he was so distracted by Cas and of course the pounding feeling of his semi completed erection that would soon become uncomfortable if left like that.

"Yes." He said quickly, making up his mind.

Cas nodded and moved up, situating himself in a kneeling position between Dean's legs.

He brought a hand down to his own dick and ran it over it, gently brushing against it until he grasped it a slowly began pumping his own erection.

Dean watched, enthralled by Cas carrying out this act so naturally when he'd never even done it before. He's a fast learner.

He doesn't do it enough to finish but enough to get precum to squirt out of his own member and for it to become slick.

He shifted a little closer to Dean, ready to go even further with him when he stops.

"I feel as though it would be more enjoyable for you to be on your stomach? Or would that be wrong. I've only ever seen this done the other way."

That sentence had a lot to unpack but all the blood had rushed to Dean's lower extremities so he wasn't really in the zone to do the unpacking. So he just answered Cas in the simplest way he knew how.

"Maybe. I wanna look atch' ya." He said softly.

Cas nodded and Dean knew he understood completely. He always did.

Cas held an open hand to his member and let a blue effect wrap around it before dissipating and leaving a wet and glossy finish in its wake. The same finish also coated the rim of Dean's hole.

"What was that?"

"Some of my grace. I don't want to hurt you." Cas replied simply.

He put a hand on Deans hip and pushed down slightly, creating a grip for himself and with the other grabbed his dick and lined it up with Dean's hole.

Dean's breath stuttered out and Cas squeezed his hip a little tighter.

"Ready?" He questioned in such a casual way. Trying to make sure Dean wasn't scared.

He nodded sharply and felt a huge pressure around his hole.

He probably should've had something to stretch him out beforehand but neither him nor Cas had thought of that so he guessed it didn't really matter.

Cas pushed into Dean so, very slowly in order not to hurt him. The grace helped.

As he inched deeper and deeper into Dean he couldn't help but squirm a little. He launched his hand down to where Cas' was, pressed against his hip, and grabbed it.

Once all of Cas had gotten inside of Dean he slowly began to ease back out. A dull, slightly painful sensation added as he pulled his hips back.

His head got to Dean's rim and he thought Cas was just going to push in again without pulling out fully, but Cas pulled his dick out with a pop and put it back within the same moment, stimulating the outside of Dean's hole.

He gasped, digging his nails into Cas' hand as Cas pushed into him again, picking up the pace ever so slightly.

This process repeated until Cas picked up speed and started off pumping, still a little slowly, into Dean.

He sped up after every few pushes when he was sure he wasn't hurting Dean until he got to a perfect speed which made Dean lay with his mouth slightly agape, eye lids fluttering and breathing mixed with moans. He had no idea that he could feel like this. Never knew he could feel like this, with Cas.

They kept the same speed until Dean's eyes suddenly widened and more of a moan than a gasp came from his mouth.

"Oh God- Cas!" He exclaimed as Cas himself felt his member go deeper into Dean.

"Such pretty noises for me." Cas whispered lovingly. Making Dean melt.

He didn't stop because he new Dean was enjoying whatever it was that he was doing.

He kept the same rhythm and speed every few pushes going just a little harder trying to inch a little deeper just to make Dean go crazy.

"Faster. Please Cas." He whined.

Cas obliged and sped up slightly for him. Dean's body rocked from Cas' seemingly never-ending stamina. Dean was going crazy.

He bit his lip closing his eyes trying hard and failing not to moan or whine for Cas.

"Please!" He practically yelped, the feeling becoming too overwhelming.

"Oh. Dean."

Cas drove in harder and sped up again. He wanted to make Dean feel so, so good. Like he deserved.

Just then a phone ringing sounded through the room, in time with Dean's moaning that they'd almost missed it.

Cas whipped his head to the side to see who it was and could just about see Sam's contact name lighting up on the screen from where he was.

"Don't." Dean grunted, Cas absentmindedly having slowed down and was barely moving in him so suddenly.

"Jus' leavit. Call after."

Cas thought for a second almost saying no when Dean raised his legs and wrapped the around Cas' body pulling him forward, pulling him into Dean. He decided to comply with Deans request and almost immediately brought his speed back up to the previous level.

They let the ringing fall silent, the room once again being filled with the sound of skin slapping against skin.

Cas hit the spot way back in Dean a few more times in a row and he just lost it.

"Ohhh sshhishhit!" He whimpered loud as ever.

"That's it. So good. You're so good Dean."

Cas pounded into him, harder and harder, he too breathing heavily as he fucked into Dean, rolling his hips as he went. His cock bouncing from every pound. Both of them set to reach their climax.

Dean moved his hand from grabbing Cas hand to gripping his forearm, feeling every movement that happened inside him.

His breath started to get impossibly fast and Cas knew it was time to finish. He gripped Dean's dick in his free hand and started to massage it slowly, picking up the pace as he went, still pounding deep into Dean.

Dean shot him a look of surprise and gripped Cas' forearm impossibly tighter.

Between Cas hammering inside him, and the steady pump of his own dick Dean couldn't hold back anymore.

He moaned out a breath with every push trying harder to stifle them but couldn't no matter how hard he tried. Cas wouldn't let him.

Cas sped up as much as he physically could, pumping Dean up and down at lightning speed, when finally, Dean became so overestimated that he couldn't hold on any longer.

"Cas!~" He practically yowled as white hot seed squirted out of his tip and coated Cas' hand as it spit out from his slit. Whilst Cas simultaneously healed Dean's wound by pumping his grace into Dean's skin. The feeling was filled with unbelievable ecstasy.

Cas still pumped into him, finishing himself off making Dean feel the aftershock of Cas filling his hole with something more than his flesh. Warmth spread through him. He let go of Cas' forearm and brought it up to his face draping it over his eyes as he collapsed back down to the bed.

Cas rocked slow into Dean trying to ease out but still jerked his dick as if he were trying to squeeze out every last drop of cum making Dean squirm. He let out broken moans, sounding completely wrecked as he went over the edge.

"So perfect."

His whole body shook from his orgasm and Cas toying with his overly sensitive tip was only contributing.

Finally, Cas removed his dick which was throbbing and stopped playing with Dean's altogether giving it one last, long tug before letting it fall back and rest on Deans ruined stomach.

Cas thought he was still riding the high of his orgasm to say anything or to do anything so he just sat there for a moment, stroking Dean's hip with his thumb.

After a minute Cas decided to break their silence.

"Dean?" He called softly.

He didn't respond, his body just continued to shudder.

"Are you alright?" He asked, wanting to make sure he hadn't hurt him.

It was then that he heard the smallest sound of a breath hitching infront of him and he spotted tears rolling off the sides of Dean's face.

Cas crawled closer to Dean and brushed a hand against his, signalling for Dean to take it away from his face. He complied, albeit hesitantly.

Cas saw tears pooling in his eyes. As he failed to keep them inside, instead they slid down.

"Oh Dean." He breathed.

He looked up at Cas, a little dazed and blurry eyed and had no way to explain to him why he was crying. He had no idea why. He was just so completely full of feeling that when the overwhelming sensation of pleasure came at the end he had no other way to react than cry.

"M'sorry-" He almost blubbered. His hair spiked up from the sweat and his cheeks had reddened in the center. He attempted to wipe away his tears from Cas' sight but Cas stopped him.

"Don't be sorry. Did I hurt you?"

Dean swallowed, trying to stop his crying.

"No. You couldn't hurt me Cas."

Cas smiled at him. A god-honest seriphic smile that made Dean's heartbeat speed up again. He was so cute.

Cas leant down and kissed Dean again. He strung lazy kisses onto his forehead and around his face, almost as if he was kissing each freckle that lived there. He pulled at the corners of Dean's mouth and scattered a few more over his lips before pulling back and stroking his face with his hand.

Dean knew he was tired, especially after that. But he hadn't been getting much sleep lately and hardly any time to relax so he just felt exhausted.

"C'mere." Cas whispered and Dean rolled on his side to get into Cas' space.

Cas held a hand over Dean and let his grace clean them both up before he wrapped his arms around Dean and pulled him in closer.

He was still very new to physical contact, and he was aware that it wasn't Dean's favourite thing but the whole mood had shifted as soon as they'd finished so Cas took that as an opportunity to try out what he'd heard people do after intercourse. He was trying to be a comforting space for Dean.

"Is this okay?" He asked.

Dean didn't respond, he just leant his head forward until it rested on Cas' chest. He wrapped one arm around his own body, something he always did when sleeping, a sort of self-soothing behaviour– and layed the other over Cas' body.

He was a little stiff, still working out how this entire thing had happened and coming to terms with the fact that he'd just boned a literal angel of the Lord. He was going to hell again.

"Is it customary to ask if I performed well?" Cas mumbled after Dean shifted.

He thought for a second. Not that he needed to, but just for how he was going to phrase his words.

"Shit, Cas.. That was the most mind blowing thing that's ever happened to me. It was kinda amazing." He complimented, his face going slightly red again.

Cas smiled, "I'm glad I could provide that experience for you. You were also extremely pleasurable."

"I didn't do anythin' but I'll take it."

"You did a lot to me."

"We should get some rest, you need to recharge and I'm spent." Dean mumbled against his skin.

"Of course. I'll take my bed, I don't want to disrupt your sleep." He said as he started to get up.

Dean's hand tightened around his torso. "What? Cas lie down." He asked confused.

"I don't want to prevent you from being able to sleep. I'll take the bed closer to the door."

"Cas. You won't prevent me from sleeping, you were just inside me you idiot. I'd like you a little closer." He explained, sounding a little embarrassed.

Cas had a look of realisation on his face, then lost it, his face going blank as his lay down beside Dean again. This time he huddled in closer.

"Thank you. Now rest. Please." Dean said, after visibly working up the courage to give Cas a kiss.

Cas wrapped his arms around Dean again, which Dean reciprocated and as the brightness of the day dissipated from the outside and the room grew dark, they held eachother tight and drifted off to sleep. The events of the day blurring out of Dean's head as all he could think about as he drifted was the sound of Cas' steady breathing beside him. Shit he loved him.