Chapter Text
Chan sighed, watching the door swing softly shut behind the movers as they exited his new apartment, leaving him in silence once more. It wasn’t a bad apartment— not by a longshot— but it was a far cry from the home they had shared in Australia.
“Why do you look so down, Chrissy?” Felix called, startling Chan out of his reverie as he glanced over at the younger man sprawled across their unmade bed.
“Maybe I shouldn’t have taken this job,” Chan mused softly as he picked his way through the boxes and sat down on the bed next to his fiance. “This feels like a mistake.”
Felix rolled his eyes and punched him in his arm with all the gentleness of a baby kitten. “It’s not a mistake, Chrissy,” Felix scolded. “You and I both know you needed this change. And besides— this was a once in a lifetime offer. I would have never forgiven you if you’d chosen to give it up.”
Chan laughed weakly and closed his eyes as Felix settled across his chest, humming contentedly. “You know,” Felix mused. “I think we should get some curtains— yellow, maybe— they’ll remind us of sunshine even when the sky is grey.”
“You remind me of sunshine, Lixie,” Chan murmured softly, not bothering to open his eyes. “I don’t need curtains to remind me of you.”
Felix giggled. “And where’s my comforter? The pretty blue one with purple flowers. We’ll need it before bed tonight. There’s no way I’m letting you sleep on an unmade bed.”
“It’s in a box, baby,” Chan replied fondly. “Somewhere. Eomma didn’t let me leave without it.”
“I love your mom, Chrissy,” Felix sang softly. “She’s the best. Always takes my side too.”
Chan grinned tiredly and wrapped his arm around Felix’s waist. “Everyone takes your side, baby. It’s impossible not to.”
Felix hummed happily and settled down as they let the soft hum of the refrigerator and the ambient traffic outside lull them both into a half-sleep. They laid there for quite a while, the light shifting behind Chan’s eyes as the sun set outside and the streetlights came on.
“Time to get up, Chris,” Felix murmured, pressing a ghost of a kiss to Chan’s cheek. “Food is important.”
“You’re important,” Chan bit back tiredly, earning a giggle from his fiance as the younger man pushed off of his chest and disappeared from the bed.
“Go get us some groceries,” Felix ordered. “I’ll unpack the kitchen while you’re gone.”
Chan sighed and rolled off of the bed with a tired huff. “Why can’t we just order in?”
Felix rolled his eyes. “Because I haven’t seen you eat a single vegetable since your mother cooked for us,” he scolded. “We’ve been living off of take out for the last three weeks and I will not stand it for another moment.”
“One more isn’t gonna kill us,” Chan grumbled fondly as he made his way over to the door and slipped on his shoes, grabbing his phone and wallet before slipping out with a gentle “I love you” to Felix standing just inside.
The younger man’s gentle “I love you” back echoed down the stairs with Chan as he exited the building.
The walk to the grocery store wasn’t a long one but Chan tried to take it slow, looking around at all of the shops that lined both sides of the street because he knew Felix would scold him if he walked around with his head down. He always did.
Seoul was beautiful, especially in the soft evening glow, and Chan tried to find some comfort in it, in the dozens of people moving around him, completely unaffected by the turmoil churning inside of him.
The little corner grocery store felt like a little slice of heaven compared to the outside world. The lights were a warm color, not the horrible fluorescent back home in Australian grocery stores, and the whole place looked packed together and a bit eclectic in comparison to what he was used to.
Chan grabbed a basket and headed towards the produce, knowing Felix would not be pleased if he didn’t come back with at least something resembling a vegetable. He grabbed simple ingredients, knowing that he wouldn’t have the energy to cook anything more complex, before heading to the dry goods.
He was ruminating between two different flavors of ramen when he was bumped into from behind.
“Ah, I’m so sorry sir,” the man who had bumped into him exclaimed, immediately bowing in apology.
Chan bowed back before reaching down to help the man collect his spilled basket.
“Ah, you don’t have to do that,” the man fretted, trying to scoop the cans out of Chan’s hands. “It was my fault, you shouldn’t have to clean up after me.”
“It’s no problem,” Chan murmured as he continued to help clean up the man’s items before they both stood up once again. “Are you alright? You didn’t get hurt did you?”
The man— about Chan’s height, fluffy light brown hair and wide expressive eyes that made something curl protectively in Chan’s chest— shook his head frantically. “No, I— I should be asking you that, sir!”
Chan snorted and rolled his eyes, a ghost of a smile echoing across his lips. “Bang Chan,” he said instead of responding to the man as he stuck out his hand. “No need to call me sir.”
The man nodded his head and shook Chan’s hand with a smaller, less frantic bow. “Yang Jeongin,” he said. “I really am sorry for bumping into you, I—”
“No more apologies,” Chan ordered gently. “I’m not upset so you shouldn’t be either, Jeongin-ssi.”
Jeongin smiled and nodded his head, very clearly swallowing down any more apologies that wanted to make their way past his lips.
“I’m not from around here,” Chan continued, wanting to break the tense, awkward atmosphere. “Which one of these is not spicy?” he asked as he showed Jeongin the two flavors of ramen.
The man released a surprised laugh before leaning forward to examine the two packages. “This one,” he said as he pointed to the left one. “The red dots indicate the spice level. Green is mild. Where are you from? Your Korean is very good.”
“Australia,” Chan explained as he put the green ramen in his basket. “Though my parents are from Korea so I’ve been speaking it my whole life.”
Jeongin smiled widely. “Well if you ever want someone to show you around I’d be happy to.” The man reached into his wallet and pulled out a business card, handing it to Chan with a bright grin.
Chan gave Jeongin an awkward smile and pocketed the card without looking at it, scared that the man was trying to flirt with him.
As if reading his mind, Jeongin’s eyes widened and he shook his head frantically. “As friends,” he rushed to assure. “I’d love to show you around the city as friends. Pretty sure my boyfriend would skin me alive if I tried to ask out another man— no matter how attractive.”
His shoulders untensed and he nodded in agreement. He didn’t bother mentioning Felix’s reaction, he knew how his fiance would have reacted. His boyfriend found humor in everything and would have laughed at the whole awkward encounter from start to finish before encouraging Chan to take Jeongin up on his offer.
“I— thanks,” Chan mumbled softly. “I’ll, uh— text you?”
Jeongin smiled again and nodded his head easily. “No pressure, just, you know— if you ever want a familiar face... I’m here.”
By the time Chan returned to his apartment, the groceries felt like cinder blocks in his hands. He set them down on the counter next to the still-packed boxes in the kitchen before wandering into the living room where he spotted Felix sprawled out across the floor, flicking through their photo album.
“Hi, Chrissy,” Felix greeted cheerfully. “I got a bit distracted. But look at this!”
“That’s our memory book,” Chan choked out as he carefully grabbed the album from the box and set it on the floor in front of him.
“Our wedding photo is supposed to go here, Chris,” Felix murmured as he dragged one finger across the empty photo frame on the cover of the book. “But it feels wrong to leave it empty.”
“We haven’t gotten that far yet, Lixie,” Chan whispered. He coughed, clearing his throat as he carefully opened the book to the first page— a photo of the two of them sitting on top of a picnic bench in their school uniforms.
Felix’s head found its home against Chan’s shoulder as he gazed down at the photo album with Chan. “We were so cute back then,” he cooed, tracing Chan’s face in the photo reverently. “Can’t believe I fell in love with someone rocking poodle hair.”
“Yah,” Chan griped, though there was no heat to his scolding, just overwhelming fondness mixed with an uncanny wistfulness that made his heart ache for simpler times. “You had some questionable hair styles too, Mr. Mullet.”
Felix just giggled and turned the page. “Look at us,” he sang, pressing his smile into Chan’s shoulder. “You were so proud of that behemoth.”
“Don’t diss Betty,” Chan scolded with a laugh. “She got us everywhere we needed to go.”
“She was a tank,” Felix deadpanned. “I still don’t know how that gas guzzler didn’t make you go broke when we were teenagers.”
Chan chuckled and turned the page again. “Why do you think we only used her on special occasions?” he teased back. “Oh gosh, I remember this day,” Chan whispered as he stared at the photo in front of him wistfully.
It was the two of them facing away from the beach as they took shelter in a little cave, soaked from head to toe, smiling at the camera so widely it hurt. “Still one of my favorite dates you took me on,” Felix whispered in his ear.
“I got us caught in a torrential downpour,” Chan deadpanned before laughing as he traced Felix’s bright smile with his eyes.
“Still one of my favorites," Felix insisted. “That was the day we first said I love you.”
Chan nodded, swallowing down the tears as he smiled at the picture. “I loved you long before that photo was taken,” he admitted. “I was just too cowardly to say it out loud.”
Felix smiled and pressed a gentle kiss to his cheek. “I know, love,” he murmured. “So did I.”
They continued flipping through the photo album until they got to their engagement photos. Chan sighed and flipped back to their high school photo. “We were so happy back then,” he whispered.
“We can still be happy, Chrissy,” Felix murmured as he draped himself over Chan’s shoulders like a blanket.
“Maybe,” he mumbled as he closed the album and set it back in the box. “But it won’t be the same.”
Felix sighed and cupped his cheeks, pressing featherlight kisses across Chan’s face when he closed his eyes. “Different doesn’t mean it can’t be good too, baby,” his fiance scolded gently. “Give it a shot, please? For me?”
“Yeah, Lixie,” Chan choked out as he leaned into Felix’s embrace. “I’ll try. For you.”