Chapter Text
Simon and Grace were arguing. Again.
This time it was something about Simon not wanting to eat me-burgers.
“Look, man, I’m not letting you freaks clone any part of me!”
“Then at least eat some of mine! Your diet is suffering and you’re gonna waste away faster if you don’t eat something more substantial!”
Simon scowled.
Ryland Grace was getting increasingly annoyed by how stubborn his unexpected roommate had been lately.
It may have taken Grace a long time to get used to Rocky when the Eridian had been his roommate aboard the Mary, but Simon was so incredibly different than Rocky had been, and Grace was at his wits end. Despite living under the same roof, Simon and Grace rarely talked and when they did it always ended with them bickering.
Grace complained to Rocky about Simon all the time, with Rocky even suggesting that they build a separate house (or even a separate bio-dome) for him, but Grace was determined to make this situation work. Somehow.
When Adrian had found Simon on a mission to explore the additional moon that had appeared in their galaxy, Grace had been dumbfounded. What was another human doing way out here?
Simon, unfortunately, had no idea how he ended up here and was extremely reluctant to say a word about his past.
After weeks of trying to get Simon to open up with multiple attempts to be nice and reason with him, nothing changed in Simon’s behavior. He showed no sign of cooperation at all.
As a result Grace had quickly closed himself off too. Maybe he was just as stubborn as Simon.
And right now he was stubbornly trying to convince Simon to let them use his cloned flesh as a means of nourishment. Why couldn’t Simon see that he was just trying to help him?
“I don’t care! I said I’m NOT letting you and your friends experiment on me,” Simon reiterated.
Grace sighed, hanging his glasses off his ear and pinching the bridge of his nose. “But we already successfully did it to me. You’re just being unreasonable. Why do you always have to be so annoying.”
Simon glared. “Fuck. You.”
“HA! You wish!” Grace said with a humorless laugh.
Something in Simon’s gaze shifted beneath the glare.
“The fuck is that supposed to mean?”
Grace met Simon’s gaze and glared back. “You heard me.”
“Who would wanna fuck you,” Simon jabbed back. “You never listen and you just do whatever the fuck you want and you always think you’re right about everything and… y’know what, I’m fucking done. I’m so fucking done.”
Ouch. Simon’s words hit Grace hard. It reminded him of all the rejection he’d experienced in his life: in his childhood, in his academics, in his relationships… He closed his eyes and scrunched his nose. Ugh. Time to take out any aggression on Simon. And oh boy, he had a lot pent up.
But before he could say anything, Simon turned around and started heading towards his room.
“Hey,” Grace called. “I’m not done with you!”
“Well, I’m done with you. Just leave me the fuck alone.”
Grace picked up a book from the nearest surface and chucked it as hard as he could at the retreating figure. It didn’t go as far as he’d have liked (it was a pretty thick manual on the mechanical intricacies on the ins-and-outs of how Arm-ando worked). It landed a foot or so behind Simon with a heavy thud.
Despite not hitting the intended target, it did make Simon turn around. His eyes were dark.
“Did you just throw…”
“You can’t just leave every time things don’t go your way,” Grace tried not to yell.
“Right,” Simon said sarcastically. “Because you’re such a role model on how to behave when things don’t go your way,” he gestured to the manual on the floor.
Grace took a deep breath. Simon was right. Neither of them were good at any of this. He clenched his teeth and hung his head. Maybe throwing a 1000-page brick of text was too far.
But Simon had hurt him emotionally, and to be honest he wanted some kind of revenge.
Just then Grace’s alarm went off. Crud.
The beeping cut through the tension and Grace felt himself regain a semblance of control over his emotions.
“Look, I gotta get to class, so you just stay here and… and… starve or whatever. I don’t care anymore.”
Simon's eyes were trained on the ground, his sole hand clenched into a fist at his side.
“Fine. Don’t respond to me,” Grace said, gathering his school bag and heading towards the door. “So childish,” Grace muttered.
Simon’s hand swung out and punched the wall making a loud bang. Grace nearly jumped out of skin.
“Fuck. You.” Simon growled again.
Grace hurried out the door leaving Simon standing there furious. Grace heard Simon punch the wall a couple more times in quick succession, letting out a scream with the pain that followed. Grace sped up his movements. He didn’t have time for this, he had classes to teach.
…
A few days had gone by. While Grace was trying to project an air of normalcy, he knew that Rocky, Adrian, and even his class could tell something was up.
He hadn’t seen Simon much since their latest argument, and the couple of times he did see him, Grace noticed Simon’s hand was bandaged up. Arm-ando must’ve helped him out with that. This surprised Grace a bit since Simon had been pretty distrustful of Arm-ando thus far. He must’ve been pretty desperate, Grace figured.
He was sitting with Rocky on the beach now, talking about nothing in particular when Rocky finally broke through Grace’s racing thoughts.
“Grace okay, question?”
“Huh? Oh yeah, sure. Everything’s fine.”
Even without eyes, Grace could tell Rocky was regarding him closely.
“Grace seem sad lately.”
Grace sighed and ran a hand through his hair.
“Not sad exactly, just… confused.”
“Grace want to talk about it, question?”
Grace thought a moment. Rocky waited, shuffling impatiently.
“It’s just… I know I’m supposed to be happy that there’s another human being on Erid now but…” He sighed again. “It’s just hard,” he finished dumbly.
“Grace Simon fight again, question?”
Grace nodded slowly.
“I want him to feel comfortable, but he just doesn’t like anything and he’s so uncooperative. It’s difficult to get to know him because he still won’t trust anyone and I keep getting cross with him as a result. He keeps hurting himself in anger and I can’t help but feel like it’s my fault because I’m not able to get through to him. Maybe if he was stuck with someone else, a different human, they’d be able to get through to him in a way I can’t.”
“Grace feel like Grace fail Simon, question?”
“Yeah,” Grace admitted.
Rocky contemplated this. “Human emotions complicated,” he finally deduced.
“You got that right, buddy,” Grace agreed.
Another long pause settled between them.
“Simon hurt bad, question?” Rocky asked.
Grace raised an eyebrow. It was unusual for Rocky to ask after Simon’s well-being since he usually took Grace’s side and wasn’t overly fond of the new human.
“I don’t know,” Grace said. “He banged up his hand pretty badly, but Arm-ando wrapped it up and is taking care of him I think.”
“Maybe Grace ask Simon if Simon need assistance with anything. Simon only has one hand and now that hand injured.”
Grace raised his eyebrows higher. “I… I guess I could do that. He’ll probably yell at me though.”
“Grace try,” Rocky said.
“Yeah, yeah, I’ll try,” Grace said.
“Rocky mean it. Grace try to get along. Or else Rocky build separate bio-dome for Simon.”
Grace laughed. “Alright pal. I’ll try to befriend him. I’ll try.”
“Good,” Rocky said. “But if Simon hurt Grace…”
“I’m pretty sure he’s only a danger to himself right now. Besides, I’m the one who threw something at him, so he’s probably more worried about me hurting him.”
“WHAT, question??”
“Not my finest moment,” Grace frowned.
“Apologize.”
“What? No way.”
“Grace apologize now.”
“Fine, fine, Mr. Bossypants.”
“Rocky not understand word.”
Grace rolled his eyes with amusement.
…
Ok. He could do this. He really didn’t want to apologize to Simon, but Rocky was right. Grace had overstepped and should take accountability. Why was that so painful to do though? It would be a huge blow to his ego to admit how wrong he was and he wasn’t sure if his pride could take it.
Simon wasn’t in any of common areas of their house and every room was quiet. Grace made his way to the door of Simon’s room and knocked lightly. The room used to be Grace’s office/lab, until Simon had come along and needed a space of his own. (Now, most of the lab equipment was taking up half of the living room instead.)
“Ahem, Simon? You in there?”
Nothing. No response.
“Simon? Helloooo?”
Maybe he wasn’t in? Simon did always go for a run around the bio-dome every day, after all, but he usually did that in the morning. Grace turned the handle and slowly peeked inside.
Simon was curled up on his bed under the covers fast asleep. He slept on his side in a fetal position, his bandaged hand up on the pillow by his face. The mutated side of his face seemed to glow in the dimming light, the sharp teeth glistening through his cheek, the boil-like lumps on his skin casting small shadows, and his mismatched eyes shut tight.
Grace didn’t care about the mutations as far as aesthetics go, but he’d by lying if he said he didn’t want to figure out what caused them. But Simon was so reluctant to have Grace experiment on him so that was never gonna happen.
Simon looked tense even in his sleep. His brow was furrowed and he was gritting his teeth. If his hand were better, it probably would’ve been clenched in a fist.
Grace suddenly felt very bad for Simon. Seeing him like this, he felt guilty. Here was a man who had clearly been through a lot, maybe more than Grace had, and this man had no one. Grace had Rocky, Adrian, his students, and the Eridians in general. Simon, however, was so closed off. He was alone.
A sudden determination overtook Grace. It’s now or never, he thought to himself.
“Simon! Simon, wake up!” He all but demanded.
He saw Simon shift under the covers before his eyelids sprang open suddenly. He quickly tried to sit up but his bad hand (his only hand) prevented him from doing so. He was now on his back lifting his head to meet Grace’s eyes. His breathing was fast and he winced at the pain in his hand.
“Fucking hell!” he exclaimed. Then he focused on Grace, “Wh… What the fuck are you doing in here? The fuck you wake me up for?”
Then a change in his expression. “Is there an emergency? What’s going on…”
Grace felt a little bad for waking him up so suddenly, but this had to be done now before he lost the courage to do it.
“I… I didn’t mean to startle you,” Grace started sheepishly. “I just… I need to talk to you. It’s not an emergency, don’t worry,” he added.
Simon seemed suspicious. He went to sit up again, this time gingerly using his hand to push himself up.
“Need some help?” Grace asked.
Simon shot him a cold look. Grace could see the pain written on his face. Once again, Grace felt guilty. It’s not like Grace had personally injured Simon, but he still felt sorry for the pain he must be in.
Once Simon was sitting upright, his legs tangled in the blankets. He looked at Grace expectantly.
“So… what’s going on? Why the intrusion?”
Grace’s stomach flip-flopped. He was already losing his nerve.
“I… I’m…” Grace paused. Simon looked at him questioningly. “I’m sorry,” he gritted out.
Simon’s mouth dropped open, but before he could speak, Grace continued.
“I didn’t mean to throw that manual at you. Well, I did mean it at the time, but that was… wrong of me and… I won’t do it again.”
A stunned silence lasted between the two men.
“Is that all?” Simon finally asked.
Grace felt his face flush. Here he was trying so hard just to be dismissed so flippantly. “Yes,” he replied curtly.
Then Grace remembered his talk with Rocky and how he had told the Eridian that he was going to try to befriend Simon.
“Yes,” he repeated, more gently this time.
Dang, this was hard.
More silence.
Simon shifted in bed and went to remove the blankets but his bandaged hand prevented him from doing so easily.
Grace took pity on him. “Look, I’m gonna make a late dinner. You want something? You don’t have to eat the me-burgers if you don’t want to,” he said offering an olive branch.
Simon contemplated Grace’s words for a moment, as if Grace was trying to trick him somehow.
“Sure,” he mumbled.
“Great,” Grace said.
Simon went to stand up but his attempt was sloppy. Grace took a couple steps into the room. “You sure you don’t need some help?”
“ ‘m fine,” more mumbling from Simon.
The teacher in Grace had to censor himself from telling Simon to speak clearly when talking to him. He held his tongue.
Once Simon was standing up, he nodded at Grace, giving him permission to lead the way to the kitchen.
Wow, Grace thought. So far so good.
…
Dinner was a quiet affair with both men eating in silence. This was their first time actually eating a meal at the table together and an uncomfortable sort of tension was settling in the air around them. Grace glanced over at Simon, eyes raking him up and down before resting on the injured hand that Simon was struggling to eat with. I wonder if he broke any bones? Grace thought as he took a bite of the me-burger.
After awhile, Grace’s curiosity got the better of him and he felt the impulse to ask Simon out loud.
“Simon?”
Simon glanced up. His long dark hair was a wild, unbrushed mess and his eyes were cold and distant.
“Are your fingers… ok? You didn’t break them, did you?”
Simon looked down. His face flushed. Was he embarrassed?
“Just two,” he said with a shrug.
“Can I, y’know, take a look at them after we’re done eating?” Grace asked. “I mean, I’m sure Arm-ando did a great job helping you, but I’d like to take a look and assess the damage if you don’t mind. Not that I’m a doctor or anything! Well, I am a doctor just not that kind of doctor.”
Grace felt like he was walking on eggshells.
Simon seemed surprised at first but then he slowly nodded.
“Ok,” Grace said. “Cool! I mean not ‘cool’ as in ‘cool that your fingers are broken,’ I mean cool as in ‘it’s cool that you’ll let me…”
“I know what you meant,” Simon said.
“Ok,” Grace said relieved. “Cool.”
Simon looked almost amused. “Yeah.”
…
Simon’s fingers weren’t all that bad. Just swollen and a bit purple but they looked like they were on the mend already. Grace was curious if this healing ability was a result of Simon’s mutations, but he didn’t ask.
“You’re healing so fast! Are you sure you’re human?” Grace joked.
Simon stiffened.
Shoot. “I mean, I didn’t mean, what I meant was…” Grace tried to correct himself. Simon probably didn’t feel very human, and Grace had just put his foot in his mouth.
But Simon stopped Grace from his messy apology. He looked sad though. “I was human, I know that much.”
Grace stared at Simon, waiting to see if he’d say anything more. When he didn’t, Grace took a deep breath and asked cautiously, “What caused all of… this then?”
Simon sighed heavily. “I… I honestly don’t know how. Or why. But there was an eel. A giant fucking eel. And all that blood. It did something to me I think.”
“Okaaaay,” Grace said. “So are you saying you’re part eel? Or was it the blood that did something to you?”
Grace got a shrug as an answer. Simon glanced over at him, but the gears in Grace’s head were turning quicker than they had in awhile. He was SO curious. Then Grace saw Simon staring at him with a furrowed brow, so he found himself blurting out defensively, “I’m not gonna ask to experiment on you!”
It was meant to be reassuring, but honestly it made him sound like a mad scientist in denial. Maybe that’s what he was? A mad scientist in denial. But he had to tread carefully so as to not offend Simon.
Ugh. Did he mess up?
He shot a look at Simon who looked almost amused again.
“Anyway,” Grace said interrupting the strange flow the conversation was taking. “Human or not, I really don’t care. Just don’t hurt yourself again, ok?”
Simon really looked surprised now. His widened eyes stared unblinkingly at Grace for a few seconds before he nodded.
“Good,” Grace said relieved. He called Arm-ando over to reapply the bandages to Simon’s hand. Arm-ando worked quickly until Simon’s fingers were wrapped up again.
…
After that, things were a bit smoother between Simon and Grace. Definitely still awkward around the edges, but smoother than they were before.
Grace would say “Good morning” every day which was met by a “ G‘morning” from Simon. Sometimes Grace would ask about Simon’s hand. Simon would say “It’s fine” and Grace would reply with a “That’s great!”
After about ten days of talking about nothing in particular, Grace thought he’d try a new tactic.
“So… Simon,” he began.
Simon looked up at Grace from the laptop. Simon liked learning about Grace’s Earth from the database that was provided on there, something Grace had offered Simon very early on in an attempt to appease him. (Before Grace had given up on trying to appease him, that is.)
And now, here Grace was, back to trying to get on Simon’s good side again.
“So, are you doing anything today?”
Simon raised an eyebrow. “Why?”
“I was wondering whether you’d like to accompany me to my classes today, maybe?” Grace had been thinking about this for awhile and he thought it would be good for Simon to meet the kids. I mean he probably should. Grace felt that what Simon needed most was a sense of community, and even if he didn’t want Grace to be a part of that community, at the very least Grace could open Simon up to the Eridians. Meeting the Eridian kids would be a good start.
Simon looked puzzled but nodded his head once. “Sure… it’s not like I’m doing anything important.”
“Is that sarcasm are are you serious?” Grace had to ask.
“I’m serious,” Simon said.
“Oh. Ok, good. Just double checking,” Grace said. He felt almost giddy. Simon was going to come to class today! “You can just sit and listen if you want.”
Simon nodded. “Sounds good.”
“Great!” said Grace.
…
Class went really well. Luckily, Simon couldn’t understand Eridian because the kids immediately responded to Simon’s presence with a million and one questions.
“Is this the other human, question?”
“Why new human look so different from you, question?”
“What other human name, question?”
“Why new human got one arm and Grace has two, question?”
Grace raised his hand to quiet everyone down. Their musical trills came to a halt. They knew by now that this gesture meant Dr. Grace was talking.
“He’s just here to listen and learn today,” Grace explained. “Same as all of you.”
He put his hand down and looked over at Simon who looked a bit uncomfortable. Grace knew he still didn’t fully trust the Eridians and not knowing the language was definitely a huge barrier. But here he was. Sitting off to the side between Grace and the wall with 18 students on the other side.
Grace gave Simon a quick smile that was meant to be encouraging. Simon grimaced back. Maybe that was the best smile he could muster for now. Grace decided to take it as a win.
…
“Sooooo, what’dya think?” Grace asked as he and Simon headed home at the end of the school day.
“You’re a better teacher than I thought you’d be,” said Simon.
“Thanks?” Grace had to laugh.
“I mean, I thought you’d be more… insufferable,” Simon explained.
Grace stopped laughing. “Is that what you think of me?”
“A little bit,” admitted Simon.
Grace almost pouted.
“But I’ve not been the best either,” Simon continued.
“Nah,” Grace disagreed. “In my opinion, you’ve had every right to be upset with me. You’ve been through a lot.” Adrian had told him about rescuing Simon and it had sounded like a horrific scene. They had to put Simon in an induced coma for weeks before he was healed enough to be woken up, and he had NOT been happy when he was.
Simon was quiet for a second before saying, “Thanks.”
“You’re welcome,” Grace said. “I just don’t want to cause you any more hurt or distress.”
Simon stayed quiet. He appeared to be done talking. Grace wasn’t though.
“Look, I know I’m not the ideal roommate, and I know it sucks that I’m the only other human here, but,” Grace took a breath. “I hope we can at least, y’know… tolerate each other. Over time, that is. And the Eridians are so curious about you. They make great friends. We can start with Rocky if you like, since he’s my closest friend. Or Adrian. I know they have a soft spot for you since they’re the one that found you…”
Simon let Grace ramble. Finally, Simon asked, “Do you want us to be friends?”
“Uh, well, ideally,” Grace said honestly. “But we don’t have to be if you don’t wanna be. It’s just that I don’t want you to be lonely. So even if you don’t want to be friends with me, there are plenty of others on this planet to befriend. Just don’t shut yourself away.”
Grace paused and reluctantly continued with his other idea, “And if you wanna go to Earth, we can always find a way to send you there. The Eridians offered me a way home, but I’m happy here as I am. I mean, I can’t leave Rocky. He means more to me than anyone.”
Simon was looking incredulously at him now. “Earth?”
Grace nodded.
“I would love that,” said Simon.
Grace’s heart dropped into his stomach. He knew the consequences of making Simon this offer but he didn’t know the answer would affect him so much. It was like he was being rejected. Again. This time by the only human for light years around.
It hurt so much knowing that Simon didn’t want to stay here with him. That he wasn’t worth it.
“But…” continued Simon. “What would I even do on Earth? They’d probably wanna study me or run tests or whatever you scientists do, and I wouldn’t be able to do my own thing.”
Grace glanced over to Simon who had a wistful look on his face. “I would have loved to see all the trees though,” Simon said softly.
Grace’s orchard was still only freshly planted here on Erid and it would be quite awhile until the trees were fully grown. Simon certainly had seemed moved when Grace first showed the saplings to him (back when Grace was trying hard to win Simon over), but Simon had seemed reluctant to let his emotions show in front of the other man. There hadn’t been any trust between them yet.
Was there an ounce of trust now though? Grace wondered. Surely his efforts had made Simon come around to him. Plus it sounded as though Simon might not want to leave after all?
Simon opened the door to the house and started over the threshold before freezing and taking a step back. Grace gave him a look of concern. Simon gestured with his hand for Grace to go first. Was Simon… holding the door open for him? Holy cow, what a breakthrough! He couldn’t let his happiness show on his face too much, however, lest he scare Simon away by how ecstatic this made him.
“Thanks,” Grace said as nonchalantly as he could manage as he stepped into the house.
Simon followed behind Grace and shut the door with a click. He could still hear the sound of the waves lapping at the shore, the gentle sound filling the air between them. There was a weird tension hanging there too, but Grace couldn’t quite place it.
After awkwardly getting a drink of water, Grace turned to Simon again. The man was staring at him with a strange look. It made Grace’s heart pound.
“Um, I have to start grading some homework. I’m already behind on it but you… you can hang out with me if you want,” he said trying to cut through whatever the heck was going on behind Simon’s eyes. Simon blinked and seemed to come back to himself.
“I… I need to take a shower,” Simon said in response.
“Sure thing!” Grace said, somewhat disappointed. Why did he care so much about whether Simon wanted to hang out with him? Like he would want to watch Grace grade homework anyway. Stupid idea.
Simon started to head to the bathroom but stopped with his hand on the doorknob.
“I’d like to go visit your class again tomorrow. If that’s ok.”
Grace’s heart leapt. “Yes! Absolutely!” Don’t be too eager, Grace! “I mean, sure, the kids love you already. I’m sure they’ll be thrilled to see you again.”
Simon nodded before heading to take a shower.
Once the water was running, Grace found himself letting out a huge breath he’d been holding. Phew! Today was super successful. Maybe he and Simon would get along after all!
…
Simon attended Grace’s class every day after that, his hand eventually healed up perfectly as the weeks went on. Grace had set up the translator for Simon so he could understand what the kids were saying and they loved asking him questions before and after class (Grace warned them about being too insensitive and for the most part they obliged).
Today, they were asking about colors, a concept that always fascinated them since their species could not see in the same way humans could.
“What color Dr. Grace, question?” Tom asked. (Grace had let each child choose a “nickname” from Earth that Grace could then call them since he couldn’t speak their Eridian names.)
Simon shrugged. “He’s like a really pale pink, I guess,” he replied.
Grace stepped into the conversation. “Humans aren’t just made up of one color. Simon’s just talking about my skin. But other features, like my hair and my eyes for example, differ from my skin’s color.”
The kids sounded impressed by this.
“Then what color Dr. Grace eyes, question?” Sunny asked.
“Blue,” Simon answered immediately.
“Like Earth sky!” said Haru. She especially loved learning about Earth from Dr. Grace and wanted to explore space someday.
“Yes,” Simon said quietly. “Like Earth’s sky.”
Grace twisted his mouth around. He felt bad because he knew this man had never even seen Earth’s sky in person. Sure, Simon had seen plenty of photos and videos on the laptop of course, but something about this made Grace sad. While Grace was perfectly fine never seeing Earth again, was he being selfish wanting Simon to stay here with him? To deny him the Earth, the sky, and the trees? As well as the friendship and companionship of other human beings?
“What color Simon eyes, question?” Sunny asked.
Grace was interrupted from his upsetting train of thought and he hurriedly said, “Okay that’s enough questions for today!” He was afraid this talk was getting too close to asking about Simon’s mutations.
“I can answer one more question,” Simon said to Grace. Then turning to Sunny he said, “One is dark brown and the other is silver.”
The kids oooh’ed at this.
Another student, Claire, raised her arm. "What color Claire, question?" she said, asking about herself.
“You’re kinda gray,” said Simon.
Claire hopped up and down excitedly at this news. “YES! Claire gray!”
Simon’s eyes crinkled a bit. “That’s great, kid,” he said. When he spoke to the kids he used a softness that Grace didn’t know he had in him. Simon was really great with them. It made Grace’s heart swell.
Soon all the kids were asking about what colors different things were, demanding Simon tell them.
Grace glanced at his watch. “Alright, everyone! I hate to cut this short, but we’ll see you all tomorrow!”
The kids started filing away from the clear wall, shouting their farewells to the pair of them, and waving their little arms because they knew that was how Dr. Grace said “hello” and “goodbye.”
Simon fiddled with the hem of his shirt, lost in thought.
“Hey,” Grace approached him. “You good?”
Simon looked up. “Yeah. I’m good.” He gave a smile.
Ok, it wasn’t really a “smile,” more like a twist of his lips, but it was basically a smile.
Grace felt a thrill of excitement nonetheless. He smiled back and clapped Simon on the shoulder. “Great!” he said.
Simon jerked under the sudden touch. Maybe Grace accidentally shocked him with static electricity?
“My bad,” Grace quickly apologized. He no longer felt so defensive about apologizing to Simon anymore.
Simon shook his head, letting Grace know that he didn’t actually mind. “You just surprised me,” he said. Then, “Ready to head home?”
Grace tried to hide another smile threatening to creep onto his face at Simon calling their house a “home.”
“Yeah, let’s go.”