Archive of Our Own

Possible Nanny?

September 1 6:45 PM
Hi, my name is Shane Hollander, and I got your name from the agency.
I’m looking for a nanny for my daughter, and you came very highly recommended.
I was hoping we could set up a time to meet.
I am a man.
The correct term is manny.
I’m so sorry.
I didn’t mean to offend you.
It’s fine. I am kidding.
Gender is a social construct.
Oh. Right.
You want to set up an interview?
Sort of.
I was hoping you could meet my daughter.
So soon? You have not even bought me dinner first.
Listen, I’m really busy, and I’m away a lot.
Hence needing a manny.
So, the faster we can make this happen, the better.
You want a stranger to meet your daughter? You do not know me. Are you not worried about her safety?
Of course I am.
It’s the most important thing in the world to me.
Which is why I’ve already had my agent background check you to hell and back and contact every single reference you’ve had in your life. Including contacting your brother in Moscow.
You contacted my brother?
Yes. He said horrific things about you.
And you still contact me after that?
I figured anyone who’s managed to piss off their drug-addict brother that much is probably a pretty decent human being.
So. Can you meet this week?
I can. Thursday at 5?
Sounds great.
We’ll be looking forward to it.
Are you going to give me any information about your daughter? What she likes, what she doesn’t?
No. You supposedly have skills. I want to see them.
Playing hard to get. I like it, Shane Hollander.
And what is your daughter’s name?
Her name is Violet.
See you Thursday.
September 4 8:35 PM
So, when can you start?
Do you always have all of your important conversations by text?
I hate talking on the phone. This is easier.
When can you start?
I don’t remember taking the job.
Seriously? But you got along great. She loved you.
Of course she did.
But you have a complicated situation, and I’m not sure it’s for me.
What do you mean?
You think I cannot do background checks of my own, Shane Hollander?
You did a background check on me?
Well, it might not have been as thorough as yours was on me, but I do know how to use google.
And the fact that you have a child with your Hollywood superstar ex while you are a big hockey star? Complicated.
It’s not like that at all. We’re not exes.
We just pretended to be.
For Violet’s sake later on.
You’re not helping the complicated allegations.
Fuck okay.
I can’t believe I’m telling you this.
Violet is the result of a drunken hookup in a coat closet at a party
I’m gay.
You are coming out to me so soon? We just met.
That’s what you took away from all that?
Everyone knows I’m gay. I came out years ago when Rose and I ‘broke up.’
I can’t believe you didn’t find that on the internet.
Oh, I did.
I just wanted to see if you’d mention it.
Jesus Christ.
Does that help? Make it less complicated for you?
Slightly.
But there is still the matter of pay.
I have another family that is interested. I’m very in demand, and I’m not just your run of the mill manny.
I have no doubt of that.
I do it all. Cook. Keep the house. Run errands. Transportation. Schedules, hers and yours. Grocery shopping. Making sure you child eats vegetables while you’re off playing hockey.
You wouldn’t have to do all that.
I don’t need someone to take care of me, too.
Your life decisions tell me otherwise.
I’m not saying I’ll fight you on it. The thought of not having to worry about cooking and grocery shopping sounds pretty nice.
Whatever you were making before, or whatever the other person is offering you, I’ll double it.
I was making a hundred thousand a year.
Dollars?
Canadian dollars sadly but yes.
I’ll give you 250,000.
Dollars?!
USD. So way more than double what you were making before.
Wow. Mr Big Rich Hockey Star.
You are a very bad negotiator.
I hope your agent is good.
She’s the best.
And so are you supposedly and my kid likes you so.
When can you start?
Why are you so convinced I’m the right fit?
We’ve already met with three other people before you came available.
She can be really particular about people, and she didn’t click with any of the others.
It was instant with you. So, I’m choosing to trust that.
She’s a special kid, I can tell.
She is. She’s the best thing in my life, and I need someone who I know will be there for her like I wish I could be all the time.
Plus, I have a guest house that’s yours for the using. No rent. And a car that’ll be at your disposal at all times.
If you take care of her, I’ll take care of you.
You have my word.
Well. If you are sure.
I am.
Just give me a few days to pack my things and then I’ll be all yours.

Rozanov

September 30 10:18 PM
Are you teaching Violet Russian?
Yes, of course.
How else are we supposed to talk about you while you’re in the room?
😑
Google translate is telling me she just said ‘my dad is lame.’
I’m only teaching her the most useful phrases.
And her pronunciation is very impressive. You should be proud.
Great. Thanks.
I’m sensing you are not happy?
I should have asked before I started teaching her.
I just don’t get to use my language much anymore, and I thought it would be nice for someone to know it. I’m sorry.
No, it really is great. I don’t mind at all. Really.
But could you maybe teach her some nice things to say, too?
She also knows how to say Ilya is the best. This is very nice.
I guess I wasn’t specific on who the nice things had to be about.
I will teach her something nice about you, even if it pains me to do it.
Your generosity knows no bounds.
And seriously, I love that you’re teaching her.
And if the giant grin on her face was any indication, she loves it, too.
Thanks, Hollander.
❤️

October 2 6:39 PM
Shit.
I just found Violet’s bunny in my suitcase.
She can’t sleep without it.
She left it in LA one time and was up all night until Rose’s assistant flew it out the next day.
Rich people problems.
I’m gone for three days, Rozanov!
What are you going to do.
This is very, very bad.
It might be, yes, if she hadn’t put it in there herself.
What?
She said she didn’t want you to get lonely at your first away game.
Oh.
Wow.
Fuck, that actually makes me really lonely instead of helping.
I thought it might, but she insisted.
She is very sweet.
And she’s not upset or anything?
She might have been, but I gave her a little stuffed dog of mine from when I was young.
I told her it helps me when I’m missing my mother. That when I squeeze it, it’s like I’m giving her a hug even though she’s far away.
She’s curled up on the couch with it, watching a movie.
Okay. Good. Fuck.
I miss her. I guess I should take your advice and give the bunny a squeeze.
Sorry for the freak out.
I would expect nothing less.
Rude.
I meant that in the most affectionate way possible.
No, you didn’t.
I did, and I bet you have that angry kitten look on your face right now.
The fuck.
I don’t have an angry kitten look.
You do. I see it every time I say something that annoys you.
That’s all the time.
Exactly.
Whatever. I’m going to bed.
Say hi to bunny for me.
Oh, I will.
Maybe I’ll imagine it’s your neck I’m squeezing.
Ooo. Kinky.
Oh my god.
Goodnight.
Goodnight ❤️❤️❤️

October 9 4:18 PM
Violet is saying she has never been to one of your games?
Hollander, what kind of father are you?!
I dunno. We’ve just always tried to keep her away from our professional stuff.
And she’s never mentioned wanting to go.
Did she say something?
Yes.
The Pikes are going to your next home game, and were telling her about it today.
She’s pouting. Worse than I’ve seen yet. Doesn’t even want her thirty minutes of screen time.
Fuck.
Do you think there’s any way out of this?
Considering I’m still in a standoff with her from three days ago about wearing a jacket, no, I don’t think there is a way out.
Do you not want her to come watch you play?
It’s not that I don’t want her to necessarily, I just kind of see her and hockey as two completely separate things in my life. And she’s normally here in the summers when I’m not playing.
Puls, I never wanted her to feel pressured to like the game.
It never really occurred to me she’d want to come.
Would it be so terrible if it wasn’t separate all the time?
It’s not like you’re signing her up for life or anything.
Because right now I’m looking at a little girl who just very desperately wants to watch her dad play.
And it’s bumming me out.
Are you okay with bringing her to a game?
Well, it’s either that or another tea party where I have to wear a crown for a couple of hours, and I just really do not have the head shape for that.
So, yes. Please let me bring her to your game.
Please.
Pleeaasseeeeee.
Okay, Jesus.
I’ll get the tickets.

October 12 11:20 PM
Thanks for bringing her tonight.
It was really special having her there.
I guess I’ll have to have you guys come more often.
Of course.
She loved every minute of it.
I had fun getting to explain the game to her.
She told me you taught her everything.
Why did you never tell me you know hockey?
Never came up.
I literally play professional hockey.
It could have come up like a thousand times in the month you’ve been living in my guest house.
I don’t talk about it much. I got injured and couldn’t play anymore.
It’s a painful thing.
Oh. Shit, I’m sorry.
It’s fine. It was a long time ago.
Watching you play tonight was fun.
Made me not feel so terrible about it anymore.
Hey, can I ask you something?
You pay me a ridiculous amount of money, so I guess you can ask me anything you want.
I’ve been wondering for a while.
How’d you end up doing this job?
I like kids.
That’s it?
That’s the easy answer people want to hear.
What’s the not easy answer?
You ask a lot of questions.
Sorry.
I just want to get to know you better. Is that so bad?
Maybe a little.
You don’t have to answer.
Just because I pay you doesn’t mean I’m not entitled to anything.
This job was an escape.
It was an escape from a life that did nothing but try to destroy me.
I’m glad you’re here then.
And I hope you’ve found that escape.
I’m working on it still, but it is much better than it was.
Thank you for letting me come to the game tonight.
I really enjoyed watching you play.
I’m glad you could come.
I see why they say you are the sexiest player in all of hockey.
🙄

October 14 9:01 PM
Sorry that waiter kept going on and on about how lovely of a family we were.
Oh, I didn’t mind at all.
He wasn’t wrong.
We do make a striking couple.
Whatever you say.
And don’t think I didn’t see you blushing.
I was not!
It was very cute with your scrunched nose and your freckles.
I’m not cute. There’s nothing about me that’s cute.
I think most of the world would disagree with you.
And you disagree with me?
Very much so.
Oh.
Well. It doesn’t matter.
I just didn’t want you to feel uncomfortable about it.
That would never make me feel uncomfortable.
Good.
Okay. Well.
Goodnight.
I’ll see you tomorrow.

October 15 11:07 AM
Hey, Rose will be in town on Tuesday, so she’s going to come have dinner with us before her flight back to LA.
Oh, goody. Dinner with your ex.
Do you want me to pull out all the stops with the food?
Are you trying to woo her back?
Ilya.
I’m gay.
WHAT.
Oh my god. Stop.
And I don’t want you to make anything.
I want you to eat with us. I’ll cook.
You are sure?
Yeah, definitely.
Rose wants to meet you.
She has met me. Many times on facetime with Violet.
Yeah, but not in person.
It’s different. Besides, you deserve a night off.
We really need to discuss what your definition of a night off is.
It’ll be fine.
I’ll be there the whole time.
Lucky me.

Rose

October 18 9:51 PM
Made it to the airport ❤️
I really, really like him.
Yeah, he’s been great for Violet
I wasn’t talking about Violet
Rose.
Don’t start.
What?! I’m just saying.
I saw the way you look at each other.
And what way is that? Like normal people?
Like I was the only thing stopping you from ripping each other’s clothes off.
Rose!
Am I wrong?!
I’m not even going to dignify that with a response.
I know you well enough to know when you want something, Shane Hollander.
You certainly never looked at me that way 👀
I have a child with you.
As the result of a drunken hookup when we were both feeling lonely.
And even then, you looked like you’d rather I keep my clothes on.
Rude.
And even if I admit that I maybe, might possibly look at him that way. It’s not like he’s looking back.
The glares I was getting every time I touched you say otherwise.
And the way he fussed over you as you were cooking. Adorable.
He’s probably straight.
Are we still assuming that about people?
Plus, I don’t want to mess up what he and Violet have with some selfish thing I just happen to want.
Yes, it would be such a tragic thing for her to have another stable parent figure.
Jesus, Rose, it’s not like we’re getting married. He’s already a stable figure for her. I don’t want to jeopardize that.
Can I give you some advice?
If I say no, will that stop you?
You know it will.
Fine. Go ahead.
I get that. I really, really do. It colors every decision you make. It does for me, too. But you’ve spent your whole life saying, ‘I can’t.’ First because of hockey, and now because of hockey and Vi. And if you keep putting yourself on the back burner, no matter how happy everyone else in the world is with you, you’re going to be miserable, Shane, and I love you too much to let that happen.
But what if it doesn’t work out?
You’re both thirty year old men who care very deeply about a child in your lives. I think you’ll figure it out.
Plus, if I’m telling you to go for it, then you should go for it. I wouldn’t say that if I wasn’t sure. I’m a pretty good judge of character.
I was right about you.
Were you?
You think I would have gone through this ridiculous parenthood journey with someone I wasn’t sure about?
Fair.
I wouldn’t tell you to do it if I thought it would be detrimental to Violet.
Plus, I really think you could stand to get laid.
Respectfully 😘
There’s nothing respectful about you.
I’m getting ready to take off, but if you haven’t been filled to the brim by a Russian man by the next time I talk to you, I’m going to be very disappointed.
For fuck’s sake.
I hope that visual sticks in your brain for the rest of your life.
Me too! 😉
Love you
Love you, too.

Rozanov

October 21 11:39 PM
Hey, you know when you mentioned my definition of a night off when Rose came?
I was just thinking. If you ever want a night off, just tell me. If I’m not home, I can find someone to watch Violet.
Why would I need a night off?
Your kid goes to be at seven thirty. It’s not like I have no time to myself.
Well, I know, but it’s not the same as like…going out or something.
Going out and do what exactly?
I dunno. You’re an attractive guy. Maybe you have dates you want to go on or something.
And I know you have friends. I’ve met them when they come over to hang out on nights when I’m home.
So see? I already have nights off.
And you think I want to go on dates?
I don’t know! I just wanted to give you the option.
And who should I go on these dates with?
I mean, I’m sure there’s plenty of hot women out there that would throw themselves at you.
You’re not wrong, maybe. Ten years ago, that was my every night.
Why don’t you still do that?
Maybe I’m looking for something different now.
Different how?
Something stable. Lasting. Real.
I’m sure there’s plenty of women out there for that, too.
You insist on it being a woman?
Like there are not men who want this?
Would you want a man?
I would like either.
Oh.
But lately, there is one person I’ve been drawn to.
This hockey player I know who has the cutest kid I’ve ever seen.
Oh?
Yes. But I’m not sure if he would want that.
With me.
I think he would. Maybe.
Maybe?
You should ask him. Next time you see him.
Ah. Well. He’s away for a week right now. I guess I’ll have to wait.
Or maybe he’ll ask you. Because he maybe really wants that.
I’ll be looking forward to that from him, then.
Me too.

October 23 9:14 PM
How’d it go tonight?
Don’t you have a game to play?
Late start game.
How’d it go?
She’s got a bit of a cough. Fought going down a little more than usual.
But don’t worry, I gave her a splash of vodka, and she’s out like a light.
It’s amazing what some good old fashioned Russian caretaking can do.
I know you’re joking, but I also need to know you’re joking.
Of course I’m joking.
But I was drinking alcohol by the time I was 12, and I turned out fine.
Okay, well, she’s five.
And I think the jury is still out on whether you turned out fine.
Says the man who chose me to take care of his child.
You like to throw that in my face a lot.
Reminding you of my greatness is part of my job. I don’t make the rules.
Are you sure her cough isn’t something serious? Does she have a fever or anything?
I can make an appointment for her for tomorrow.
There’s medicine in the cabinet in the kitchen.
Did you set up the humidifier? That might help her sleep.
Hollander.
Sorry.
Right.
You’ve got this.
You’d tell me if it was anything serious.
Yes, I would.
I just worry.
And I miss her.
We miss you, too 😘
I didn’t say anything about you.
You don’t have to. I just know 😉
Is that part of your Russian caretaking abilities?
You have not seen half of my caretaking abilities 😉😉😉😉
Are you flirting with me?
What was your first clue?
I mean, the winking faces helped.
Would it be so terrible if I was?
I am technically your boss, so…maybe?
You are not.
Violet is my boss, and we both know it.
That’s more true than I’d like to admit.
And I guess I don’t hate the idea of you flirting with me.
And I might miss you just a tiny little bit.
Ah. My heart is so warm, how will I stand it?
Asshole.
Go win your game, Hollander.
I’ll be watching.
You’d better.
❤️

October 24 8:46 AM
Well, what did you think?
How’d I look last night?
Your backhand could use some work.
But otherwise, you were fine.
My backhand? Seriously?
Fine.
You looked good or whatever.
Just good, huh?
What do you want me to say? That you looked like sex on ice?
That would be a good start.
Just get your ass home, Hollander, and then maybe I’ll show you how it felt to watch you.
Is that a threat or a promise?
Both.

October 26 2:28 PM
Would you want to watch a movie tonight after Violet goes down?
If you don’t have any plans.
Rose sent me a screener of her new one coming out, and I thought you might want to see it.
Is this your attempt to woo me?
Showing me a movie with your ex in it?
For the hundredth time, she’s not my ex.
We’re coparents. And friends. It’s completely different.
But I would like to relax and spend time with you, yes.
I’ve wanted to do that for a long time, if I’m honest.
Is that all you want?
To relax?
It’s one thing, yeah.
But you’ve been flirting for days, and now I also just really want to make out with you.
😳
Fuck. Nevermind. I take it back.
Don’t you dare.
That was so brave.
I’m so proud.
Oh my god. Nevermind.
I don’t want to spend time with you.
Yes, you do.
You liiiiiike me.
Fuck my life.
You reallllly liiiiiike me.
Yeah, a little too much.
It’s becoming a real problem.
I like you, too.
I will help with whatever weird fantasy you have.
Let’s make out on the couch while your ex acts in the background.
You are so irritating.
😉
Thank god you’re hot.

Hayden Pike

October 28 8:01 AM
Ilya wants to know if Jackie would like him to take all the kids to the park after school so she can have the afternoon off?
Hang on let me ask.
She said, and I quote, ‘fuck yeah!’
Wow. It’s not very often Jackie has to put a dollar in the swear jar.
She also says if you’re not already in love with him, she’s about to be.
Well. About that.
Shane.
What does that mean?
SHANE.
You better spill so fast.
Can we meet for lunch?
I’m already in the car, just tell me where.
And you better spill EVERYTHING.
Even the sex stuff?
SEX STUFF?
Maybe you can leave some of it out, because boundaries and all that, but holy shit.
Shane Hollander is having sex.
They really do grow up so fast.
I need different friends.

Ilya ❤️

November 3 8:58 AM
Are you still freaking out?
Um. Well. Let’s see.
My daughter found me cuddling in bed with a man.
Shirtless.
And then I had to leave for a road trip immediately afterwards and not even get to talk to the guy I like about the mind-blowing sex we had the night before because I’m having a panic attack out about my daughter finding us in bed together.
So, yeah. Still a little freaked out.
Mind-blowing, huh?
Ilya.
Shane.
I know it feels scary.
But I promise she’s okay.
She’s eating breakfast, happy as can be.
I just didn’t want her to find out that way.
It’s not exactly the kind of example I want to set.
If it’s that big of a deal, we don’t have to do anything again.
I don’t want to make your life complicated.
NO.
Ilya. No, no, no.
It’s not that. Seriously.
I just didn’t want her to find out before I knew what this was to you?
Because I didn’t want to introduce her to it if this was just sex or something.
Is that what you want it to be?
No.
Not at all.
It’s not what I want either.
I’m serious about this.
I wouldn’t do it if I wasn’t. Not when Violet is involved.
I’m serious about it, too.
Really serious.
I know.
Everything about you is serious.
Can we just not sleep in the same bed until I explain to her?
Of course. If you think it will help.
Fuck.
This is going to be a nightmare to explain.
Can I tell you something?
Yeah.
My parents were never happy. They didn’t love each other. I’m not sure my father was capable of such a thing, and he made my mother miserable every day. I would have loved to have seen her sleeping in the arms of someone she cared about.
I would have given anything for that to be true. She might still be here if it was.
I think Violet wants that for you, too.
Well, now, I just want to cry.
I did before, too, but now it’s for different reasons.
It will all work out, I promise.
Get some rest on your flight. You’ll feel better ❤️
I don’t need it!
That was the best night’s sleep I’ve had in ages.
Probably all the orgasms I gave you.
No.
I mean, yes, but no.
It was because you were there.
You make my mind go quiet.
It was good for me, too.
Mind-blowing?
Eh, I wouldn’t go that far.
Dick.
I do have a very talented one, yes.

November 5 10:24 PM
You know how I said we shouldn’t sleep in the same bed until I talked with Violet?
Yes.
It was stupid.
Can you come here?
One of my favorite things about you is your ability to admit when you were so stupidly wrong.
Fuck you.
COME HERE.
On my way ❤️

November 11 3:21 PM
It was so nice going to the park with you and Violet today.
Yes.
I loved it, too.
I don’t get to watch her be a kid enough.
She made so many friends. She’s changed a lot since she’s gotten here.
Definitely takes after her mom.
Maybe. But I look at her, and all I see is you.
What? Seriously?
Mmm, yes.
She’s outgoing, but there’s this quiet determination in her that is very you.
And she likes to boss me around. Also very you.
Wow, I guess I never noticed that.
But you’re right. She likes to be the best at everything.
She just reminds me so much of Rose, I never really looked for ways she’s like me.
Give yourself some credit for her.
Is it weird that I wanted to hold your hand so badly the whole time?
I get it. You’re not ready for people to know.
It’s not that. I just want to enjoy you to myself for a while. I feel like I have to share myself with everyone else all of the time, and I don’t want to share you yet.
I want to be selfish about you for as long as I can.
Who am I to stop you from being selfish?
I really like you, Ilya.
I like you, too, Shane.
I’ll see you in a couple of days.
Hurry back 😗
December 14 8:28 PM
Is Violet in bed?
Yes.
Are you in bed?
What is this, twenty questions?
No.
Fuck. I just miss you.
Trouble sleeping?
Yeah.
But maybe not for the reason you think.
Oh? Is there something specific you are missing about me?
🍆🍆🍆
Don’t make fun of my horniness.
Tell me about it, then.
Tell you about it?
Like sexting?
Yes, Shane.
Like sexting.
How do I do that?
You are hopeless.
❤️
Just tell me what you wish I was doing to you.
Oh.
Okay.
I wish you were here to touch me.
Touch you where?
Um.
My privates?
Oh my god.
WOW.
I knew you’d be bad at this, but that is on another level.
Fuck off!
It’s hard!
Well, I can tell you one thing that certainly isn’t hard after that.
My privates.
I hate you.
I’m still horny, and I hate you.
You don’t.
Give me five minutes, and I’ll facetime you and show you how it’s done.
Okay. Yes. Please.
Pffttttt.
My privates.
Shane, you are gay. Be better.
Stoooppppppppppp.

February 4 1:10 PM
I have a day off in a couple of days?
Any interest in spending it with me?
I can have my parents watch Violet for the day.
Always.
What would you like to do?
Let’s stay in Ottawa when we drop Violet off.
I want to see where you’re from.
Take me to your favorite places.
I want to learn more about you through them.
Oh, okay. Sure.
Ottawa is kinda boring, but I can think of a few places I would go.
Maybe we could skate on the canal, even?
I don’t know, I haven’t skated in forever.
Will you try?
For me?
Okay.
For you.

March 14 12:25 PM
We’re getting ready to board, but do you think I should call out of the game tomorrow and come home?
I’m worried about Violet, she seemed really sick.
She’ll be fine. I gave her some tylenol and she’s resting now.
It’s probably just a bad stomach bug.
Yeah, but what if it’s not?
What if it’s something serious?
Then I’ll take care of it.
You don’t have to worry.
But I do worry.
I’m her dad. It’s different when it’s your kid.
Yes, you remind me of that all the time.
It doesn’t mean I don’t care about her as if she was.
I don’t need you to remind me I’m not her parent every day.
I know I’m not, but I still take the best care of her.
I wasn’t trying to say you weren’t?
You don’t need to get defensive. I just want to make sure she’s okay.
But she IS my kid, and I have a right to worry about her wellbeing.
Of course you do.
Good luck at your game.
Will you call me later?
Yes. I’ll keep you posted like I always do.
Okay. Bye.
Bye.
March 15 7:31 PM
Shane I need you to answer your phone.
Please.
We are on our way to the hospital.
Things just got worse really quickly.
As soon as you see this please call.
I don’t know what’s wrong yet.
Your mom and dad are on their way, too, but please.
We need you. Please answer.
Please.

March 16 10:15 AM
Ilya, I’m so sorry.
Please come back.
I get why you’re not answering your phone. I know you’re upset. I would be too.
Fuck, I said horrible shit to you, and I didn’t mean it.
Of course you took the best care of her. There’s no way you could have known her appendix was about to burst. You’ve done everything for her. For me, too.
I’m terrified for her, and I’m mad at myself for not being here, and I took it out on you, and I’m so fucking sorry.
I feel so guilty for not being here all the time. I have for her entire life, but I’m realizing I don’t have to be all the time, now, because she has you. She’s in the best hands with you.
You’re going to kill me for telling you this in a text, but I love you. I need you to know that.
I don’t know when it happened, but I blinked, and you were everything, and I don’t want to do any of this without you.
I love you.
Violet loves you.
Please. We need you.

March 28 1:52 PM
Can I help you pack at all?
No, I think I am good.
Okay.
Violet’s already moping around about you leaving.
She will be alright.
She’s one of the most resilient kids I know.
Not when it comes to her favorite people leaving.
And what about you?
Are you moping?
I think devastated might be the best word for it.
I still have no idea how I’m supposed to function without you.
You managed for thirty years before I got here.
Barely.
It’s only two weeks, Hollander.
I know, but you’ll be so far away.
And I’ll be worried sick about you the whole time you’re there.
You would be worried sick no matter where I was.
It’s your constant state of being.
But it’s Russia.
And your brother is awful. My agent said she felt like the sun was dead after she talked with him that one time.
I will barely see him, I promise.
I’m just tying up all my loose ends and saying a last goodbye to my mother.
I wish I could come with you.
Me too. But I will tell her all about you.
And when I’m back, we can tell the whole world about your stunningly handsome boyfriend and how deeply he satisfies you in bed.
I will forever be in awe of how quickly you can go from being the most romantic person I know to the most obnoxious.
I am a man of many layers.
I love you.
And you’ll come for a weekend at the cottage when you get back?
Yes, I’ll meet you at the cottage.
Okay ❤️
We’ll be home from Hayden’s at 3 to drive you to the airport.
Fine, but tell Violet she can only cry a little bit.
Leaving you two is already hard enough.
She’s not the one I’m worried about.

April 10 5:32 PM
I’m almost there.
Thank fuck.
I’ve missed you so much.
Come through the house and out to the dock when you get here.
The door’s unlocked.
We have a surprise for you.
Okay.
See you soon.

April 20 4:46 PM
I dropped your ring off to get it resized before I left today, so don’t freak out if you’re looking for it.
❤️
I told you I could just wear it on my necklace.
But I want people to know you’re mine.
Possessive much, Hollander?
Only of you.
Have you thought at all about when you want to announce it?
As soon as the season’s over.
We can tell the world and then go to the cottage so we don’t have to be around for anyone’s commentary on it.
The parent Facebook group is going to go wild.
The awful things they will say about you.
Seducing your much younger nanny.
Okay one, it’s manny.
Two, we’re the same age.
Three, I didn’t seduce you.
This is true.
You couldn’t seduce anything if your life depended on it.
Good thing you still want to fuck me all the time anyway.
Yes, well. We all have our burdens to bear.
I can’t wait for everyone to know.
You are done being selfish with me?
Never.
I’m just proud to love you, and I want people to know.
God, you’re embarrassing.
I want that, too.
Remind me to give you your tickets for next game. Mom and Dad are coming, too.
Looking forward to it.
Do you think we can win it all?
This year? With that line?
No.
Well, fuck.
But I will cheer for you all the same.
Gee thanks.
April 24 10:57 AM
How’s the trampoline park?
Horrifying.
I’m afraid she’s going to break her neck every three minutes.
I’ve been spending too much time with you; I’m turning into an anxious mess.
Glad to see I’m rubbing off on you.
But she’s loving it, so I’m trying not to kill her joy.
You might as well embrace it. It’s part of being a parent.
No thank you. I will keep being the fun one for as long as I can.
Are you texting one-handed?
Yeah, how else am I supposed to text with a broken collarbone?
Maybe don’t text at all?
I know you miss me, but I’ll be home in a couple of hours.
You act like I’m so obsessed with you, but Hayden just sent me the video from last night right after I got hurt.
You jumped the boards?!
How else do you think I got down there?
I don’t know, I was in so much pain, I just assumed you showed up somehow.
You were hurt. I was scared. I just reacted.
And Cliff Marlow better be glad he left the city last night.
He’s fine. He already apologized.
Honestly, I’m more upset about the victory sex we were going to have.
And the whole being out for the playoffs thing.
Also, I can’t believe you didn’t get arrested for coming out on the ice.
Well, they tried to hold me back, but Hayden told them to let me go.
Turns out he can be useful.
So, I guess everyone knows now, huh?
Considering there’s video all over the internet where I’m yelling at security that I’m your fiancée, I would say so, yes.
I’m sorry.
It’s fine ❤️
I’ll have Farah come up with a statement to put out later today.
Kind of annoyed only a couple of guys from my team have checked on me, though.
Not a single congratulations either.
You are a free agent at the end of this season, yes?
Maybe it’s time we think about moving. Go somewhere where you’re appreciated.
You’d be okay with that?
Moving for me?
Of course.
You and Violet are my life now.
Unless you are planning on leaving me behind.
It’s tempting some days.
I might look into it. Just to see.
And we can talk about it some more.
Okay. No rush.
We have time.
Yeah. That’s true. We do ❤️

May 1 7:35 AM
Shane.
SHANE.
What?
Is everything okay?
Do you know what your daughter just did?
Well, I’m currently stuck at home, and you’re supposed to be dropping her off at school, so I’m going to go with no.
She just called me Papa.
PAPA
Oh ❤️
Yeah, we talked about that a couple of days ago. What she wanted to call you.
She’s been working herself up to it. Made me swear not to tell you.
Wait, you’re not upset, are you?
😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭
That doesn’t really answer my question.
NO I AM NOT UPSET.
I will just need 3 to 5 business days to recover.
She called me Papa.
She’ll be calling you that a lot.
You’d better get used to it.
Never ❤️

July 8 12:11 PM
Don’t forget to pick up Violet’s dress from the tailor.
Already got it.
And they’re dropping the chairs off at four.
I’ll be there.
Hey.
Yes?
We’re getting married tomorrow.
Can’t wait.