Chapter Text
As far as classmates went, Collis didn't think much of any of his.
They minded their business and he minded his, looking no one in the eye and moving through the hallways like he didn't want to exist.
It was… Simpler.
Easier.
The less humans that knew him, the better.
He was already pushing it by having Sarah.
By letting her in, by letting her see there was anything to him. Let alone everything else; let alone a tragic, miserable, cosmic existence to boot and unearlthly (HA) trauma no human could live with, let alone that he could even begin to process. (WASN'T THAT SUCH A FUNNY PUN ISN'T HE HILARIOUS.)
…Stars.
No wonder no one other than Sarah wanted to be his friend.
And she was weird. Like, really weird.
So she didn't even count.
She had a knack for befriending any poor soul she could get her hands on and, unfortunately, one of those poor souls had happened to be him back in high school. And he was younger and somehow dumber—if you can believe it—and… A secret third thing that he didn't want to name.
…
Lonely.
If you really must know.
So, being the genius that he was (and still isn't), he let her talk to him and then talk to him some more and then he was talking to her and. That was that.
Most of her friends, he only knew through her; and that included Emerson. Who was… Almost his friend. Maybe. Sort of? But not really because Kayden (her boyfriend) looked ready to bite his head off everytime he got anywhere close to her.
He'd been surprised to learn a Katsija could be a boyfriend, but hey, you learn something new everyday, huh?
He did make sure to tell Sarah to keep an eye on him. Just in case.
(Friends or not, Emerson seemed too nice a human to be manipulated like that.)
Wait what was he talking about again?
Oh, right. Classmates. Sarah.
Yeah, Sarah knew pretty much all of them. Or at least ninety-nine percent. There was, like. One guy. Michael? Whatever. If she wasn't interested in talking to him, Collis wasn't interested. That's just… Kinda how it was. If Sarah didn't bother with you you know you fucked up somehow.
Now, Collis wasn't sure what this guy had done, but apparently it had everything to do with yet another classmate of theirs. Whom she did talk to on occassion, but they weren't really friends—instead she heard it from Kayden who heard it from Emerson who heard it from Jake who heard it from the source. But then apparently this had driven a wedge between Sarah and Jake's friendship, 'cause he'd been pissed off after hearing it had gone around the small friend group (if you could call it that) and completely shut off any form of communication with people he knew would run with the info now. Which was just lame, to be honest. And also weird because it was really Kayden's fault anyway, Collis decided.
"Never ever make friends," had been Sarah's oh-so-wise (anti-)friendship lesson of the day the day Jake had chewed her out.
Collis took her word for it. Warily.
(Not that he was planning to talk to any of these people to begin with.)
(…He did like hearing about it though. Just. Out of curiosity.)
(Not because of anything or… Anything.)
Okay.
All of this to say.
Classmates. Yeah. Collis didn't know them.
"Uh… Hey," a voice said behind him, hesitant.
Except for the one.
He turned. "Yeah?"
"Where's—" they began. "I mean…"
Collis blinked slowly.
They blinked back.
"Ya'know Sarah. Right?"
Oh stars what was this going to be about now. "That… Depends," Collis ventured, cautious. "What'd she do?"
"O-oh, uh, n— Nothin'," they hurriedly assured, "I was gonna ask if she wanted to proofread somethin' for me."
"Oh so you are friends now." The words slipped out of Collis without a second thought, and they started at him.
"I— Huh?"
"You're Summer, right?"
"…Yeeeeeah?"
"Cool, cool. I'll tell her you said hi. Or… Whatever it is that you said."
He didn't wait for a response, turning back around in his seat like nothing had happened. Which worked for everyone involved because it spared the person talking to him embarrassment of having talked to him, and spared him the sight of any annoyance that showed on their face thereafter.
So. That was that.
Interaction? Over.
Sarah? Absent.
Proofreading? Sarah.
Hotel?
.
.
.
Tr
Tri
Trivag
Collis slammed his head into one of his books and prayed no one saw it.
*
The next day, Sarah continued to be absent. She'd gone on vacation with her family in the middle of the week. It only made sense if you were her.
The next day, Collis felt a tap on his shoulder again.
By process of elimination…
Or. Well. The fact that Collis knew who he sat in front of every lecture in this course.
He turned again to face them, stone-faced. "Yeah?"
"Is your brain okay?"
…
Uh
"Assuming I have one, I guess so?"
The look on their face was hard to read. Almost flat like his, but not quite. "I was just wonderin'. 'Cause I saw ya fuckin' ram it into your book yesterday."
"It was a paperback," Collis said, leaning his arm against the back of his chair.
"…No it very fucking clearly wasn't—"
"I have a thick skull, don't worry about it."
They just looked at him again.
He grinned back.
"I—…" They drew in a breath. "Yeah, okay."
Yep. And just like that they were tired of him.
He removed his arm from the chair, turning back around.
"When's Sarah gettin' back?"
Colls shrugged, paying more attention to the pencil he was rolling around than the professor at the desk. "Probably next week."
"Damn," he heard them mutter.
Huh.
Maybe they were more tired of him than they thought.
*
The third day.
"The Hell's your name anyway?" they inquired
Collis's shoulders stiffened.
He forced himself to relax, facing them with a questioning grin.
"…Uh. Collis? Why?" he asked. Were they going to, like. Tell the whole campus he doesn't have a brain? Or??
"Just wonderin'," they shrugged. "'ve seen ya 'round Sarah a lot."
Collis snorted, "What, you think she's my girlfriend or something?"
"No?" they scoffed. "Said, just wonderin'. "
"If she's my girlfriend."
"Wh—" they spluttered. "No, who the fuck you were."
"…So you can make her your girlfriend."
"The fuck?" They looked at him like he'd just slapped them across the face. All annoyance and bewilderment and almost disgust, even.
Okay, so if they hadn't hated him before, he was sure they did now.
Task failed successfully!
"The fuck's your problem?"
Collis just grinned.
*
Summer stopped tapping him on the shoulder after that.
They moved to a different seat.
Somewhere.
Collis didn't memorize where.
Why should he?
Sarah came back, and when she noticed their movement from middle row of chairs on the right to the back row of chairs on the left, she glared him down with the type of fury that could insta-kill whales or something.
"The fuck did you do."
Collis shrugged.
That made her glare deepen. Somehow.
"Tell me you did not scare them off, you better fucking tell me right now Collis—"
"Go sit with them then," he interrupted.
Sarah's mouth came agape. "I— What?"
"Just go sit with them?"
"Wh— Oh my gods, I can't fucking believe you right now, why are you—"
"I don't get what you're pissed at me for," he lamented, "I'm offering a solution to your problem."
This time, it looked like she was imagining ripping his head off with her own fingers. They even twitched at her sides.
"What did you say to them." It wasn't a question.
"Nothing? I just teased them about you being their girlfriend, that's all."
"I'm— What?!" she exploded.
The whole class's attention shifted.
"I'm not their girlfriend!"
"Yeah, I was teasing them about them wanting you to be their girlfriend."
She looked absolutely gobsmacked.
Collis was…
Starting to think maybe he fucked up.
"You— Why?!"
"'Cause it was funny?" he lied.
"No wonder— No fucking wonder they moved."
"Why?"
"Oh, here, let me count," she drawled, holding up one hand, counting her fingers off. "Well, one, it was none of your fucking business to ask about that to begin with; two, they just got out of a relationship…"
Oh.
"Three, I'm guessing you didn't apologize." She continued when he said nothing. "And four, I'm guessing you did that intentionally to make them go away and stop talking to you, and they probably picked up on that, because it's crystal-clear when you're trying to be an asshole just for the Hell of it."
…
…
"Wow."
"Wow what," she said flatly.
"You have me pegged."
Sarah narrowed her eyes, then took off her glasses.
He was almost shocked when she just took out a rag to clean them and didn't hit him over the head with them.
"If you don't apologize to Summer by the end of today," she went on, "I'm never talking to you again."
"Harsh," he muttered.
She gave him a pointed look that blared, Take a look in the mirror, dumbass.
"Fine, fine," he sighed, "I'll do it right now."
She raised a brow. "You don't have to."
Collis shrugged.
He stood to his feet, feeling Sarah's eyes in the back of his head as he shuffled to the back of the room to where they were sitting. They looked up as he approached, and visibly froze at the sight of him.
…Well, that.
…
Wasn't that what he'd been wanting?
"Hey," Collis managed. It came out wrong and he coughed. "I'm— I'm sorry. About— I shouldn't've… I'm sorry. For, uh… Pressuring you? Uh. About the nonexistent girlfriend thing. I was. Trying to purposefully be a dick and. That was really stupid and really awful of me. And just. I'm sorry."
Summer blinked. "Uh."
For the longest time, it was just that.
Then they added an even more unsure, "Thanks…?"
"Yep okay bye have a nice day,"
Collis turned on his heels and fled the scene.
Sarah was at his ear almost instantly. "That—"
"Don't."