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Ivan had experience with sex. Sort of. He knew how it worked; he’d slept with some girls back in college, he’d made out with them. Pretty girls who had offered themselves on a silver platter. His classmates had insisted that it was a trial, or some rite. Something about it being a necessity to ‘becoming a proper man’. Ivan had agreed, half out of peer pressure, half out of curiosity.
The experience had been an utterly miserable one. Underwhelming, and overwhelming at the same time. Her perfume was sweet, too sweet. Something vanilla and cinnamonish that clung to every article of clothing he owned, and his car for weeks. Mixed in with the smell of sex was a potent and a little gross. Ivan almost developed a headache halfway through it. The rest of it all was, well, uncomfortable. By some miracle, he actually managed to get hard and finish inside her.
She never complained, not even in the other few instances they hooked up again. He returned the favour by staying quiet when his teammates spoke of their ‘conquests’.
The only person who knew of his slight distaste for sex was Mizi, of course.
“You’re gayer than Cinderella at the ball,” was her uninterested answer, humming as she looked through a magazine.
He’d laughed, brushing her off. There was no way. Mizi liked girls, she had said so as young as six and had a penchant for saying ‘you and me, Ivan, we're similar’. While Ivan generally agreed with that statement (yes, they could be quite similar in many aspects) this one seemed a bit of a reach.
His logical conclusion had been to tell Till, hoping to get a laugh out of his best friend. Only to then be met with eyes full of curiosity.
“You can like both,” was Till’s answer. “Like me, I mean. I always assumed you did too, since you hang out with us three…”
It caused Ivan’s whole world to shift on its axis.
Not only at the realisation that Till liked boys, but that Till had, for a time now, believed Ivan liked them too.
Ivan had always known there was something different about himself. He always felt like an actor on a stage, perpetually performing a role expected of him since he was young. But Till, Till was the opposite. He, not only refused to perform for anyone, but also bore his fangs, even at the risk of being disliked. The artsy student, covered in half-dried paint and smudged eyeliner; he was the complete the opposite of Ivan.
He always did what he wanted. So yes, it made sense for him to be someone who loved freely. It shouldn’t have been a surprise, yet it was. The idea, the concept, that you could like girls and also boys.
That Ivan could also like girls and boys.
And boys.
A boy.
Mizi had laughed, very very hard, when he shared this realisation. Ivan, however, insisted that it proved nothing. Yes, maybe he liked boys, too. But that was not why he disliked having sex so much. Sex was just underwhelming. It was just unpleasant. It had nothing to do with attraction (or lack thereof it).
It all changed when he started dating Till.
Of course it did. Everything about Till defied logic, defied chance. It was as if his mere existence was a middle finger to any semblance of structure that ruled Ivan’s life. Ever since they were kids, all the way until they started going out, Till had been a crack on his superficially perfect, phoney life. And what laid underneath were Ivan’s ugly, destructive emotions, and Till’s own perfectly chaotic beauty.
Dating him was the culmination of all those feelings. Accepting that they existed was painful, but it bore fruit whenever he got to kiss his boyfriend and forget where feelings started and where thought ended.
It was Till who had brought up the idea of sex. A few months into their relationship, and approaching it all with more cautious curiosity than anything else. Ivan, unable to deny anything to Till, had readily accepted.
The lingering thought of his unfortunate previous experiences nagged at him. He wasn’t exactly thrilled about doing it once more. However, maybe this time was different. If everything was as bad as he remembered, he could still indulge in the fact that it was Till. He could find comfort in the fact that it was Till, reckless and chaotic Till, who trusted him enough to do this with someone like Ivan.
That much was bound to be enough.
But, oh boy, was he wrong.
He hadn’t expected it all to feel so good. Ivan felt his brain melt. From the kisses to the touching, to the soft warmth when he finally got to put it in. Everything was warm and soft, everything about Till was so damn beautiful. Ivan was a bit embarrassed about how he came a tad bit early, but nothing too bad – he assumed. He came sooner than he had with the girls (a genuinely embarrassing difference. Most times Ivan could barely stay hard the whole time).
But Till hadn’t complained. That must mean Ivan was, maybe not good, but decent enough. He'd insisted on the sex a few more times. The first few times, a bit hesitant, worried Till might not like the idea. But time and time again, Till had readily agreed. Yes, Till had never initiated sex. But that could have easily been chalked up to his naturally shy personality. It didn't mean anything. At least, not anything bad.
It isn’t until a horrifying date night.
They were having dinner at Sua’s when it happened. Everyone was there. Sua was already tipsy, leaning on Mizi’s shoulder. Mizi herself was chatting with Hyuna, very loudly, while Luka stared at her. Ivan was paying attention, chiming in now and then.
Till didn’t say much, sipping on the wine glass, the last bits of the bottle left. They had all gotten a bit loose-lipped with alcohol. That much was normal. They’d done this a few times before. TMI no longer existed between them.
So, he wasn’t surprised when the conversation turned to sex. He knew that Mizi liked eating out Sua, and he knew Luka had agreed to get pegged by Hyuna a few times. He also knew Hyuna still preferred using Luka’s dick. And he knew the sizes of everyone at the table.
At this point, he was sure, there was nothing he didn’t know about the rest of the people he’d basically grown up with.
“How about you, Till?” Mizi interjected her rant about how cute Sua was when she came to turn to Till. “You’ve been dating for a while now!”
“Oh, right!” Hyuna yelled, suddenly excited. “You’ve graduated a virgin now! You can join in! Tell us!”
Ivan was almost certain Till would not answer. In the two or so months they’d been going out, Till had evaded the question. Thoroughly. Ivan had never really thought much about it, given that he himself wasn’t partial to discussing sex before Till.
He figured his experience was relatively similar to Till’s. There was no need to worry about it.
But Till must have drunk a few more shots than he usually did, because instead of silence, or a spluttered red look as he looked away…Till actually answered.
“Why are you guys so into sex anyways?” He asked with an exasperated huff. “You guys hyped it so much”.
“What?” Hyuna asked, eyes wide and a smirk forming on her lips. She had been waiting to pounce, and now she had Till where she wanted him. Ivan suddenly had a very bad feeling.
“He had a bit too much to drink-” Ivan tried to interject.
“Hold it, Romeo,” Hyuna stopped him. "We finally got him talking!"
“What do you mean, hyped it up?” Mizi asked, confused. Although knowing her, Ivan was sure she was just searching to create more trouble. “We’re honest, Till! What are you saying?! Having dec with Sua is the BEST!”
Till just sighed.
“Easy for tops to say,” he muttered.
Ivan watched as Mizi froze up. Hyuna laughed hysterically by her side, and Luka pouted. Mizi couldn’t move, looking slightly over her shoulder to see Sua. Mizi was trembling, likely a bit scared, or even sad at the thought.
But Sua remained impassive and followed with a deadpan “I like sex”.
Till whipped his head towards her.
“You’re lying,” he said, seriously. The air in the room shifted. It went from a casual hanging to a very serious discussion that everyone was acutely attuned to.
“No, I’m not,” Sua said with a pout. She was slightly drunk, too.
“You’re sure?” Till asked a bit incredulously.
“Yes, I’m sure,” Sua insisted. “I’m not a liar. ‘Not my fault your boyfriend has a small dick”.
Everyone else gasped and looked away. Till huffed out, annoyed.
“I wish,” he said. He pouted, genuinely pouted. Like this was the biggest injustice he'd met yet. Ivan didn't know what to say. “Big dicks hurt”.
Ivan felt his heart break.
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Till, in all honesty, didn’t have a reference for what sex was supposed to be. He was, after all, a virgin. All he knew about sex, and what it was supposed to look like, was what Mizi and Sua had told him when they were growing up (in the throes of puberty, which had promptly killed whatever pathetic excuse for a crush he had on Mizi), and porn.
Both of which seemed a bit fake. There was no way something could feel so good that you got addicted to it, and there was no way it lived up to Mizi's loved-fueled-rose-colored-Sua glasses. Surely.
He was, nonetheless, curious. Everyone around him sang it praises, and it looked like it was meant to be a life-altering experience. He’d been mortified to ask Ivan, especially as he knew Ivan didn’t particularly like sex. But Till liked Ivan. He loved his boyfriend. If he were to lose his virginity to someone, he wanted it to be Ivan.
And yeah. Most of what Ivan had said proved to be true.
It was extremely painful and not that good. Overwhelming and underwhelming at the same time. Kinda gross, to be honest.
But even though it was less than a pleasant experience, Till indulged in it because, well…
It looked like Ivan really enjoyed it. It was actually kind of cute. The always composed, closed-off Ivan, getting flustered and chasing his own pleasure. Ivan wasn't the type to cut loose like that often. It warmed Till’s heart to see him care for nothing other than enjoying himself.
Ivan had that tendency to be hyper-aware of others’ stares and react in the way they wanted him to. Wasn’t it kind of beautiful that he searched for no such thing from Till?
Till felt truly happy just seeing Ivan enjoying himself. He guessed that’s how sex was supposed to work. The act itself was uncomfortable, but it was simply a trade-off for seeing your partner happy, and that’s what’s fun about it. He had absolutely no complaints and would indulge his boyfriend in the act, no matter what.
But, in hindsight, he never should have let it slip that having sex was uncomfortable. Not only had it been a wound to his boyfriend’s ego, but it had also thoroughly sealed Till’s own fate. It would have been better had he lived a bad sex life.
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After that, Ivan was desperate to show Till that sex could feel good. He was a man on a mission. He spent every waking moment studying, perhaps more studying than he had done for anything in his life, and that’s saying something. But he couldn’t help it. Everything was on the line here.
He couldn’t bring himself to have sex with Till if he knew that Till wasn’t enjoying it like he was. It felt just wrong, terrible.
Around a week later, they’re trying it out once more, and Ivan is on a mission. Till is very confused.
Ivan, after all his research, comes to terms that the best way to make this a pleasurable experience for Till is to (as much as it would pain him) not immediately put his dick in. He would have to wait until he makes Till comes.
Till, on the other hand, doesn’t understand how this is going to help. He is extremely skeptic about the whole ordeal.
“This feels weird,” he tells Ivan almost as soon as they start. “Can’t you just put it in?”
Ivan vehemently shakes his head, fingers continuing to work his boyfriend open.
“You said it hurts,” Ivan insists.
“There is no way it won’t,” Till says, letting out an annoyed huff. “You’re too big”.
Ivan would usually feel either pride or shame. If it had been a few weeks before, it would be pride. If it had been a few days before, shame. Shame at the knowledge that his big dick was causing so much pain to the loveliest existence in this word.
It should still be causing that sensation now. Unfortunately, as Ivan has found, the longer he’s dated Till, he’s a huge pervert. And his stupid big dick just jumps in excitement at being called such by Till’s low and annoyed voice.
Till then, let’s out an annoyed sigh, unable to fight back anymore. It seemed like Ivan was having fun, in his own weird way, and Till didn’t have the heart to tell him (or get him) to stop. So, he just lies back and lets his boyfriend do what he wants.
Truth be told, Ivan does have some talent. He’d been able to satisfy girls when he had sex with them, making sure they had fun (since he wasn’t able to).
It’s just that…Till made him lose all track of proper etiquette and technique. Ivan couldn’t help it; he usually got too lost in pleasure to make anything click. Could you blame him? Till looked so cute, so adorable with tear streaks in his eyes and a pout. And his pussy felt so good and warm that Ivan couldn’t help thrusting like a maniac with no concept of pace or technique.
But now, he knows, and now he has a plan. It doesn’t take long for Till to start feeling it. After all, he was sensitive.
Ivan noticed, perhaps a bit too sensitive. It dawned on him that perhaps the brutal pace he’d set was too rough for Till, who seemed to melt just with Ivan’s fingers. He was careful then. Making sure his fingers didn’t go too hard and touched the right places. Ivan noticed how slippery everything was getting – it had never felt this slick and wet. Curiously, he began touching Till’s hooded clit, as he heard the boy take a sharp breath. It was working, probably,
It didn’t take long for the first moan to escape Till’s mouth.
And something strange awoke in both.
In Till, pure shame.
He didn’t know things could feel this good. It was a spark of pure electricity directly to his brain. The moan came involuntarily and escaped him before he had the mind to stop it. And it sounded awful. It was like the moans of some porno actress, pathetic and high-pitched.
He couldn’t do this. There was no way he was subjecting himself to the dangers of letting out such a sound again. This all felt dangerous. Way too dangerous. Nope, he was tapping out. It was too much.
But before he could tell Ivan to just stop, the bastard started moving his fingers again
Ivan, meanwhile, felt like his whole world had shifted. He was still hard in his pants but had no urgency nor want to take care of it. His mind was solely focused on Till, and the way his face was contorting as he tried to fight the pleasure. The little whimpers and moans he made. It was breathtaking. He could stay all day just watching Till attempt to regain what little control he had, just for Ivan to snatch it up and force him to moan in a high pitch. Ivan could feel himself drooling just from watching how Till’s voice kept going up and up.
When Till came, Ivan was so enthralled he could barely breathe. It was so endearing, from the way his whole face turned bright red, to the way tears formed in the corner of his eyes and the pathetic little whimpers that escaped him.
“S-stop!” Till finally managed to whine out.
Ivan did not. Without waiting for Till to finish catching his breath, Ivan dove in and began eating Till out. He didn’t care that Till was tugging at his hair, desperate to get him to stop. Vaguely, Ivan was aware that Till’s crying about it “being too much”.
He couldn’t care less about it, though. All he had a mind to do was watch Till coming again. To hear those wrecked moans, to see Till coming apart and become putty in his hands. Till’s grip on his hair was growing weaker and weaker, and his sobs became louder.
The second time Till came, he did so with a strangled sob. Ivan was fairly content with how boneless Till was. He definitely seemed to be enjoying himself. He went up and kissed his boyfriend, all too knowledgeable that if there’s one thing Till couldn’t resist - it’s a kiss.
Despite how tired and wrecked Till seemed to be, he still had enough strength to return the kiss. Sort of. Ivan was definitely the one doing most of the work. Till was trying to kiss him back but could only prop himself up the slightest bit, following Ivan’s movements.
Ivan kept kissing, running his tongue all over Till. The poor thing couldn’t stop drooling and making a mess. Ivan rutted up against Till’s hole and the punched-out sound that came out of Till’s mouth was beautiful.
“N-no,” Till managed to say. “It’s too much”.
Ivan was far more surprised that Till could still talk. He rutted his clothed dick once more, and an overstimulated whine escaped Till once more.
“You sure?” Ivan asked between kisses. “I prepped you so good, though, I’m sure it won’t hurt this time”.
That made Till hesitate. Ivan knew. It was always an ordeal to get Till to take it all in. And the biggest complaint Till had over Ivan in that fateful dinner was that Ivan was too big. Hyuna and Mizi had laughed.
“There’s no such thing as too big,” Hyuna had said in between laughs. “Just not enough prep”.
They had even gone as far as to claim that Ivan was probably not that big, and he was just not doing enough to help Till take it in. Something that Till took great offence in.
Ivan was ridiculously big, and Till had to suffer the consequences of it. He hadn’t felt like he was being split apart just for others to laugh and say he was just being dramatic. Genuinely, Ivan has a problem and said problem was 7 inches and some standing right next to his pussy.
That said.
“Look at you,” Ivan said, fingering Till once more. The squelch it made from how wet he was was mortifying. Ivan looked dazed, as if he were in heaven even though he hadn’t even unbuttoned his pants. “You’re perfect, Till. You’re so wet, you’d take so well”.
And curse him. Curse his boyfriend to all hell and back. Because when he was asking Till with that dazed look, so happy and so content, Till couldn’t say no. Ivan looked almost cute. And no man about to rip out a third orgasm out of Till with his fingers should look cute.
But Ivan did. Of course he did. And even though Till was already twitching with oversensitivity and certain that he would have to deal with the pain of being stretched open, he couldn’t bring himself to say no. He wanted Ivan to enjoy himself and keep looking at him like that.
Hesitantly, scared even, Till nodded his head. Ivan looked so happy and so excited. Till didn’t know what he would do if his overstimulated pussy hurt too much and he had to ask Ivan to stop. He was dreading that sting he was so familiar with and winced just imagining it.
Yet, he braved on. Sure, he could handle it. He could fake a moan, and he could watch Ivan enjoy himself. He’d done it before; he could do it again. Except, this time, instead of Ivan just ramming it in, Till felt the head of Ivan’s dick stick in between his folds.
He kept rubbing himself on Till’s labia, smearing around all the wetness Till had. It made an embarrassing sound, and it felt good. So good. Ivan’s dick was hot, and it kept nudging at his little t-dick. It was addictive.
Till found himself rocking his hips to the movement.
He almost didn’t notice when Ivan changed the angle, and slowly it went in. Of course, that’s an “almost” cause as soon as the head breached in, Till could feel it. He was half waiting for the sharp pain to settle in. But it never did. The stretch just burned.
But it burned so good. And the burn didn’t stop. It kept going and going until he could feel the pressure in his tummy ache. Before he realised it, his eyes were twitching, unable to process just how full and how good it all felt. Nothing hurt. Not even a bit.
The only thing he felt was how stretched out his pussy was - and oh god. Till had never paid attention to it. The pain was always too much, and he would rather stare up at Ivan’s face. Watch his beautiful boyfriend lost in pleasure, trying to find a semblance of a climax from it.
But now he was staring at the place they were connected. A feeling of pure horror and shame overtook him. His face was surely a mess, all red and distorted. He didn’t want Ivan looking at him in that state, but there were so many things happening, he could barely focus on one.
“H-how…” Oh god, his voice sounded awful. Raspy and wet, barely coherent from all the saliva pooling up. “…did THAT fit…?”
Ivan’s hips stuttered forward, and Till clenched up involuntarily.
A yelp escaped him, which Till desperately tried to cover up with his hands. Just as he brought his hands up to his mouth, in pure shame, he felt something wet fall on them. He looked closely and- Till looked up, in shock, just to see Ivan’s nose bleeding. Pure panic overtook him.
“Ivan-!” Till wanted to scream, stop everything and force Ivan to rest. But before he could even move, Ivan thrusted his hips forward, and all forms of coherent thoughts left Till in an instant. It felt good. So good. He couldn’t think of anything other than Ivan.
His eyes went up to see his boyfriend, who had the widest, stupidest smile ever. Till would find it amusing or gross (he wasn’t sure which yet) if he weren’t so turned on. All he saw was his boyfriend, all he could feel was pleasure all over, and all he wanted…was a kiss
All the while, Ivan was slowly getting into a big predicament. Having sex with Till had already been something that felt insanely good. Even when Till wasn’t responding all that much, and it was just Ivan shamelessly chasing his own pleasure. Now though?
He worried he might be addicted.
Now that he could not only indulge in it, but watch Till crumble in his hands, watching him lose all sense of reason? Now that Ivan could make Till look at him and only him? Till looked so utterly lost beneath him. His mind off of anything that wasn’t Ivan.
He never thought it was possible. It made every nerve in his body stand, feel electrified from top to bottom. Ivan watched as blood fell from his nose, uncaring for it al. He had Till’s undivided attention. And Till could only think about him, and how good Ivan made him feel.
Ivan didn’t hesitate. He kissed Till. Just as he did, he felt Till become increasingly tighter and tighter. Tighter than he’d felt before, and it was driving Ivan insane He wanted to last longer but couldn’t. Despite how much he wanted this to last longer, Ivan was only human.
Without caring about anything else, Ivan came close after Till. He felt Till trying to push him away after a few seconds. It was only after he confusedly pulled away, that he realised. Oh. He forgot the condom.
“Pull out,” Till said in a slurry of words. “’M not on the pill…”
Till harshly suck in air when he felt Ivan’s dick twitch inside him. He stared up, half in horror at Ivan, who stared down at him with hunger in his eyes.
“P-pull out,” he said once more, hoping to find the puppy who wanted his attention staring back.
Till almost felt relieved when he felt Ivan’s dick slowly slip out. Just to scream once more when Ivan thrusted back in. No. No no no no.
“Ivan!” Till yelled once more, trying to push his boyfriend away. “I can’t come anymore! I’m done-!”
It was useless.
Till could feel his brain start to melt back, as the sparks of pleasure bloomed in the back of his mind.
“You can,” Ivan assured him, reaching down to play with his tdick. “You have a smaller refractory period. It’s okay, I’ll make you feel good”.
If Till were in his right mind, he’d say “it’s not about if I can!”
Unfortunately, he wasn’t in his right mind. He couldn’t tell left from right, much less what was happening or how to get Ivan to stop. All he knew was that his throat was starting to hurt from screaming so much, his eyes hurt from crying, and how whole body was on fire.
And he could feel his womb grow warmer and warmer with Ivan’s cum. Drool pooled up in his mouth, and even his tongue felt numb. From time to tim,e Ivan would reach up to kiss him, which would cut off oxygen from Till’s brain. It was all a haze, as he felt like he was drowning.
He wasn’t even sure when it all stopped. All he knew was that his whole body felt wrecked. He could feel his cunt gape, unable to close it as all of Ivan’s cum dripped out. Till wanted to do something, anything. But he couldn’t. He didn’t know where he began, and Ivan ended.
He couldn’t even orient himself. If he tried to push himself to stand upright, he’d prob fall back in a few seconds. So, he resigned himself to staring at the ceiling.
“Uhm,” Ivan finally said. It seemed like his brain was back online after dumping all of his sperm inside him.
“I-I’ll go grab some water,” was all Ivan dared say, all too aware that his boyfriend looked straight up mauled in his bed.
Till let out a sigh. He could still feel the aftershocks of his orgasm vibrating under his skin. This was bad. Real bad. Was sex supposed to feel like that?
Till wanted to reach for his shirt, hoping that some sort of shield could make everything feel…less. As it was, his whole body felt like an exposed nerve ready to combust at the lightest touch. He couldn’t find his shirt but found Ivan’s jacket on the floor.
He tried to get up, reaching for it. But as soon as his legs made contact with the hardwood floor, all strength left him. Till was sent stumbling onto the floor, half holding Ivan’s jacket in his hands. When Ivan came rushing back in, scared by the loud sound –
He found Till on the floor, head covered with his jacket, crying big, fat tears as his whole face turned red.
“Uhm, Till…?”
“I-” he started out, looking up, face so red, barely coherent. “I-I…I can’t get up…”
Till watched with silent mortification as Ivan had the gall to smile. It was that creepy, perveted smile he always got whenever he teased Till. Till hated, hated, that smile and how vulnerable it made him feel.
What was worse, Till's eyes wandered down, and he noticed Ivan's dick already standing up in attention once more. What was he!? A sex maniac!?
Till felt the tears rush down his face, in pure shame. His pussy clenched, already so turned on, even though everything hurt, that he doubted he'd be able to get up. A puddle of Ivan's come slipping out of his raw, oversensitive pussy was already forming where he was sitting.
This had to be a lie. He felt utterly betrayed.
Who was supposed to tell him, sex actually felt good!?