Archive of Our Own

Eddie is snuggled in bed, lying on his side with his blanket pulled up to his face, phone staring brightly back at him. He scrolls through TikTok, his for you page a collective of ASMR, baking, and mukbangs. He feels his body relax further into his mattress as he finishes up a delicious ASMR video, scrolling after adding it to his favourites. 

A familiar voice and face send a wave of cold shock down his body as the next video starts, his eyes widening as he stares at Buck on his screen. ‘Baking While Baked’ is plastered in bold letters across the top of his video, confusion seeping into Eddie’s face. 

“Hello, everybody. Welcome back to another video where I bake while being baked,” Buck winks, a sly smile sinking into his cheeks. His eyes are droopy, half-lidded, and red; his cheeks are flushed with a tint of pink, starting to spread across his nose and down his chin. His words come out slow, like honey dripping off his tongue. 

“I’m going to try doing ASMR, but the keyword here is try,” a soothing, deep chuckle rumbles through Buck’s chest, spreading warmth over Eddie’s body. 

Eddie pauses the video, looking around his room like he’s about to get caught watching something he shouldn’t. Buck smokes? And makes content out of it? Should he be watching this? Why shouldn’t he be? He’s not doing anything wrong– Buck isn’t doing anything that shouldn’t be viewed by a coworker, by his best friend. 

He unpauses the video, watching it all the way through. The longer the video gets, the louder Buck unintentionally becomes. His natural clumsiness becomes even worse as he drops a pan, splattering a few eggs across the table and dripping batter all over his apron. By the end of the video, Buck has flour dusted over his face and in his hair, raw batter stuck to the bottom of his chin from when he licked the spoon and his eyes, his eyes are so strikingly bright. They’re drooping so lazily it looks like Buck is struggling to even keep them open, his pupils dilated despite the bright lights in his face. He looks stunning like this, completely relaxed with calm, joyous, happiness radiating from him. 

Eddie stares at his screen as the video begins to replay. He nibbles on his bottom lip, clicking on the comments. He likes a few that call out Buck’s clumsiness and laugh at some of his jokes, though his thumb hovers over one talking about how snuggly he looks, wondering if he’s single and if so, what his problem is. 

Defensiveness courses through Eddie’s veins, his eyebrows frowning as he fights the urge to reply. Buck isn’t the problem, so therefore he doesn’t have one. All his previous partners have just been – they just weren’t what Buck needed, and that’s not Buck’s fault. He’s sweet and caring and would do anything for you. None of his partners gave him that back or understood, so really, everybody else has been the problem. 

Eddie closes the comments when his heart starts to thump in his chest. He tries not to think too much about why he suddenly feels so defensive over somebody blaming Buck for all his failed relationships. He clicks on Buck’s profile and gives him a follow before he scrolls through more of his videos. 

—— 

A few days later, Buck and Eddie find themselves alone in the ambulance, forced to do inventory. Eddie shoves some things around to get an accurate count, voicing his findings to Buck. 

“Hey, I really enjoy your baking while baked videos, by the way. They’re super calming, actually,” Eddie laughs, counting softly to himself. 

Buck freezes, his head snapping up from the clipboard in his hands. His eyebrows are furrowed, his jaw dropping in shock. 

“What? I don’t– I don’t know what you’re talking about,” Buck lets out a nervous laugh, scratching at his chin. 

Eddie turns to look at Buck, tilting his head. “C’mon man, yes you do. Where you smoke then bake something. Pretty comedic too if I do say so myself.” 

Buck leans back in the gurney he’s sitting on, tapping the pen against the hardwood of the clipboard. He’s silent for a few seconds before he speaks again.

“How did you– you don’t even have TikTok.” 

“I made an account about a week ago. I was getting really annoyed anytime Chris would send me a link and it would take me to the webpage and just ask me to sign in anyways. It’s just easier, honestly.” It’s Eddie’s turn to furrow his eyebrows, confused at Buck's sudden change of mood. 

“How did you even find it? I have everybody blocked– besides you, apparently.” 

Eddie sits back on his feet, staring at Buck, dumbfounded. “I have your number, Buck. You do know there’s a thing where people in your contacts show up on your socials, right?” He waits a few seconds, studying Buck’s face, trying to figure out his thoughts and how he’s feeling before speaking up again. “Y’know, it’s not a big deal, Buck. I’ve had a medical card since I left the military. Helps with my pain.”

Buck chokes over his words, finally putting the clipboard down, leaning forward so he’s closer to Eddie. 

“You smoke weed? Marijuana? The devil's lettuce?” Buck's voice drops to a whisper, looking around before his eyes land back on Eddie. 

Eddie turns his body fully towards Buck, leaning against the gurney next to him. Offence spreads over his body, starting to feel defensive. 

“Yes? You’re acting like I’m some prude or something.” 

“N-no!” Buck's eyes widen, “No I just– didn’t expect it, is all.” he licks his lips, rolling them between his teeth. Eddie stays quiet, waiting to see if Buck will continue and say what he wants to. 

“Alright, man, there’s something else you’re not saying. Spit it out.” 

“Okay fine!” Buck throws his hands up in the air. “You’ve been smoking this entire time and I didn’t know? We could have been getting stoned together this ENTIRE TIME and I didn’t know?” Buck throws his head back, a few curls falling in his eyes. “Dude we have to go to the aquarium while high, it’s life changing.” 

Eddie chuckles, scratching his chin. His smile feels like it’s cracking through his skin, never realizing how much he truly was missing out on by not telling Buck of his habit. 

“We could make that happen,” Eddie nods. Silence surrounds them in the ambulance, and they both turn back around and return to inventory. “You could always film at my house, too. Y’know, for times you sleep over and stuff.” Eddie’s words hang heavy in the air around them, causing anxiety to start racing through his body. 

“Really?” Excitement wraps around Buck's words, his smile crinkling his eyes in the corners. 

“Really. We can smoke and I’ll just sit behind the camera, let you do your own thing.”

“Oh I can’t wait. I’ll be over after this forty-eight hour shift.” 

——

Forty-eight hours later, Buck and Eddie find themselves sprawled out in Eddie’s backyard, weed spread out over his patio table. Eddie was an avid smoker, but he’d never seen this much weed outside of the dispensary. 

Buck hands him a bubbler, nodding for him to try it. His smile is big and relaxed, excitement sparkling in his eyes. Eddie grabs the piece, their fingers brushing over each other. Waves of heat travel over Eddie’s body, spreading deeply in his chest and stomach. He stares at the bubbler for a second, trying to regulate his breathing and heart rate. 

“Hey are you okay?” Concern swims in Buck’s voice as he leans forward, spreading a hand out over Eddie’s bare thigh. Eddie’s head snaps down to where Buck’s skin connects with his own, almost burning through Eddie, like he’s being branded by him. 

“Y-yeah sorry I’m just–,” Eddie gulps, finally meeting Buck’s eyes so he knows he’s being genuine. “I didn’t expect you to, well, be the fucking dispensary.” 

Buck barks out a laugh, throwing his head back as the beautiful sound surrounds them, and memorizes Eddie in his seat. Buck doesn’t retrieve his hand from Eddie’s thigh, rubbing small circles on it with his thumb. 

Eddie cannot think about this right now. He can’t think about how hot his body is becoming, how self-aware he is, and how close Buck is, let alone touching his bare skin. He brings the bubbles up to his lips, flicking the lighter before he inhales deeply. He pulls the bowl from the downstem, swallowing down the smoke. The harshness of it fills his lungs, drying out his throat on its path down. He holds his breath for a few seconds, turning away from Buck to blow it out. He puts the glass and lighter back on the table, covering his mouth as he starts to cough. His eyes water, his head getting dizzy and lightheaded as the violent coughs rip through his body. 

“Holy shit Buck,” Eddie gasps for air, holding onto the arms of his chair for stability. 

“I thought you were a smoker. You’re looking awfully like a rookie right now.” Despite Buck’s words, they’re soft, teasing. 

“I am, but I don’t smoke the shit that came straight from Satan's asshole,” Eddie snatches his water, taking a huge gulp to try and suppress the burning sensation in his throat. 

Buck throws himself back in his chair, his head tilted back as a contagious laugh falls from his lips. Tears pool in his eyes, his face turning red from not being able to breathe. Eddie tries to keep his guard up, to pretend to be upset or mad, but he can’t when Buck looks and sounds like that. A laugh bubbles in his own stomach, the water in his throat coming back up. He covers his mouth, leaning forward over his knees as the water spills from his mouth, pooling in the palm of his hand. 

“Ew! Eddie, oh my god!” Buck shouts, pulling his knees up to his chest. His laughter bubbles out of him like rays of sunshine, happiness just soothing out of his skin like it's naturally what’s supposed to happen. And maybe it is, at least in Eddie’s eyes. 

Eddie drops his hand, the water dripping off his fingers as he starts to cough once again. He gasps for air, banging his hand on the table in front of him in hopes of stopping the burning and painful feeling in his throat. 

“Buck–,” a deep gasp. “You can’t– oh my god you–,” Eddie leans back in his chair once again, wiping the tears that have started staining his cheeks, taking a few deep breaths before he continues. “You can’t do that when I’m already dying over here. Are you trying to kill me?” 

Buck pouts, giggles still filling Eddie’s ears like a beautiful melody. 

“Okay Mr. Dramatic,” Buck licks his lips, dropping his feet back on the ground. “If I tried to kill you, who would I have to annoy all the time?” Buck tilts his head, grabbing the bubbler for himself. “This is actually something new, I’ve never tried it before.” 

Eddie’s eyes widen, his jaw dropping as he stares at Buck. “You’ve never tried this one before? And you made ME the guinea pig?”  

“I didn’t really think of it like that, if I’m honest. But I feel like you’re over exaggerating, being dramatic,” Buck quirks an eyebrow, a playful smile breaking across his face. 

He brings the neck up to his lips, flicking the lighter before he takes a rather large hit. Eddie sits patiently, waiting for Buck to break out the same way he did. He clocks the exact moment it happens when Buck’s face scrunches up, his eyes welling up with tears before he exhales, coughing harshly into his arm. His face goes red, gasping for air. 

Eddie falls into a fit of laughter, leaning back in his chair as his head lolls to the side. He feels like he’s on autopilot when he reaches to pass Buck the bottle of water. 

Buck snatches the bottle, it crinkling from his tight grasp. He takes a few large gulps, water dripping down his chin as he pants, trying to catch his breath. 

“Okay, what the fuck was that?” Buck's eyes snap to Eddie’s, a flicker of guilt flashing through them. 

Eddie’s body curls in on itself with laughter, his head between his knees as his arms wrap around his torso. Buck joins him, their laughter harmonizing. 

“I take back everything I said. You were not being dramatic enough. I feel like I need to sue whoever sold that to me,” Buck coughs once more, settling back into his chair once they’ve calmed down. 

Eddie wipes his tears from his eyes, unfolding himself to mirror Buck. He lets out a sigh, his head rolling to the side. 

“I don’t think that’s a great idea,” Eddie’s head moves so he’s looking at Buck, his eyes dancing over the other's face, appreciating and memorizing every feature, curve, and wrinkle. 

“Why not?” Buck raises his eyebrow, his nose scrunching up. 

“How well did it turn out for you the last time you tried to sue somebody?” Eddie wets his lips, biting the bottom one, waiting for Buck’s response. 

Buck's face drops, a laugh cracking from his chest as he stares at Eddie bright-eyed. “Okay, why am I catching fucking strays right now?” Buck lets out a deep laugh, it surrounding Eddie in so much warmth he might think the sun just laid a blanket over him. “That was different, and you know it.” Eddie rolls his eyes, not being able to contain the smile that brightens up his face. 

“Where the hell did you learn the phrase ‘catching strays’?” 

Buck stares at Eddie like he has two heads. “You have a fourteen year old son that also happens to be one of my best friends. Do I need to spell it out for you?” 

“Watch your tone with me, Buckley.” Eddie warns, inhaling deeply to try and cool off the heat seeping into his skin. 

“Or what?” Buck snips back. 

“I don’t think you want to go down this route, man. I have a fourteen year old son, you’re going to lose every time.” 

Buck is quiet for a few moments, rolling his lips between his teeth before he speaks up again. 

“Okay, yeah, you’re right. That trials and tribulations, tragedy in ninety-seven acts phrase you used on me was harsh.” Silence fills the air around them before Eddie breaks it. 

“Y’know, I hate to say it, but I think this is the best high I’ve ever had,” Eddie hums. His head feels light, like it’s floating off his shoulders. He feels like he’s melting into the shape of his chair, his body relaxing more than it’s ever known how to. All of his pain is gone, feeling like he could move in ways he hasn’t been able to in ten years. And his mind? His mind is quiet, for the very first time in his life, he doesn’t have that constant voice in the back of his head whispering about how much he’s a failure. He feels happy, completely carefree. 

His gaze zones in on Buck, just watching, staring. Buck looks beautiful, of course he does. With his eyes half lidded as they stare back at Eddie, a faint sparkle lighting them up. The sly, shy smile that’s curved onto his lips, his head tilting to the side. His cheeks are tinted pink, just like they always are in his videos. The orange from the sun setting hits his skin beautifully, causing it to glow a deep, golden orange. The sun peeks through his hair, creating this aura around Buck. He looks so cuddly like this, so warm and bright. 

Eddie fights the urge to push himself forward into Buck’s lap, to nuzzle his nose in the crook of Buck's neck. He wonders what it would feel like to sit in Buck’s lap, to straddle his thighs, their torsos pressed flush against each other. How strong Buck’s arms would feel wrapped around Eddie’s waist, holding him in place while still being so gentle, treating him like a glass that’s bound to break. He wonders if Buck would nuzzle his nose back into Eddie’s neck, inhaling deeply to take in his scent, to memorize it by heart. 

“Earth to Eddie,” Buck taps Eddie’s thigh with one hand, swaying his other in front of Eddie’s face. 

“Huh?” Eddie snaps out of his thoughts, his throat drying up, heat spreading out over his cheeks at being caught staring. 

Buck is quiet for a few moments, just watching, waiting. 

“Are you ready to go inside?” Buck’s smile fades down to just a slight pull of his lips. 

“Oh– yeah,” Eddie rushes to stand up, moving quickly to grab all of the weed in front of him. A pair of large hands covers Eddie’s, stopping his motions. Buck's fingers rub soft circles against his palm, soothing Eddie’s racing heart. 

“Are you okay?” Buck’s voice is quiet, concern wrapped around the words like a blanket. His eyes are big and round and soft. 

Eddie can’t seem to think straight, his eyes dropping to their hands that are laid together. They could hold hands right now, he wants to hold hands right now. His body wants to act on its own every time Buck touches him, every time their skin connects into one. His body feels like it’s on fire, his arm feeling too heavy now that Buck has a hold of it. 

This was a bad idea. Eddie never should have gotten high with Buck—he should have known this would happen. That he wouldn’t be able to hide away from his feelings, to prevent himself from staring and making a fool of himself. God, he was probably being so obvious. 

Eddie pulls his hand out of Buck’s gentle grasp, nodding softly as he forces a soft smile onto his face. 

“Yeah, yeah I’m okay.”

Buck hesitates, waiting to see if Eddie breaks the silence. When he doesn’t, Buck gives him a soft nod, helping him pack up the rest of the weed. 

After they’ve made their way inside and put everything away, Buck pulls out all the baking stuff he needs. He sets his phone up on the counter, Eddie hidden behind it at the table. They stare at each other for a moment longer than necessary, their brains telepathically communicating, confirming once again that this is okay. 

Buck presses the record button on his phone, his smile taking up half of his face, causing his eyes to squint. 

“Hello, everybody. You know what time it is. Welcome back to Buck, baking and baked,” he nods, his eyes shifting to Eddie for a quick moment, sending him a wink as his smile turns into a smirk. 

Eddie sits forward in his chair, putting his elbows on the table, his chin in his hand. He watches as Buck whispers to the camera, trying his damn best to stay quiet but failing, once again. Eddie's body feels like it’s floating, like it’s lying on a cloud of Buck. 

With every clumsy accident, Eddie giggles, covering his eyes like that will stop it from happening. Every time the sound leaves his mouth, Buck breaks character, a smile flashing before he lets out a soft chuckle to himself. 

When their eyes meet, after every giggle and shitty joke, Eddie’s chest blooms in heat. His heart feels like it’s trying to break through his ribs, like it’s trying to leap over the kitchen table and into Buck’s own chest, to beat together in sync with his own heart. 

“This smells amazing, Buck,” Eddie sniffs the air, his mouth watering. 

Buck wipes spilled batter off his hands with a rag, dropping it on the counter before reaching forward to stop recording. He grabs the edge of the counter, leaning forward on his arms. 

“What can I say? I’m a master baker,” he winks at Eddie, ducking when a chocolate chip flies his way. 

“I guess I’ll be the judge of that,” Eddie snickers, sticking his tongue out at Buck. 

“You’ll love it.”

“You’re being awfully confident. I’m not sure arrogance suits you, buddy,” Eddie says around a mouthful of chocolate chips, his words light, teasing. 

Buck gasps, putting a hand on his chest. “How dare you? You love everything I bake.”

“And you wanted to call me the dramatic one,” Eddie gets up from his chair, opening the fridge to grab them both a drink. “But I have to admit, you got me there. I love everything about yo–,” Eddie pauses, freezing in his spot. His eyes focus on Buck, the way his hair is messy over his forehead, how his eyes shine brightly, like they hold the ocean behind them. His sweatshirt hugs his chest snugly, making Buck look like he’d be so comfortable to lie on, cuddle up to. He wonders what it would be like to come home every day together, to see Buck in his– their kitchen baking something any time Eddie mentions having a sweet tooth. How intimate and domestic it would feel, how intimate and domestic it already feels, and–

Oh. 

The dam breaks, flooding Eddie’s body with an overwhelming amount of emotions. He connects all the dots of his previously failed relationships, and how easy everything has been with Buck. And it’s because it's always been Buck. His body relaxes, peace and comfort running through his veins, because his life, mistakes, everything added up to this moment, that he was always supposed to find Buck, because it was always supposed to be him. 

Their eyes connect, and Eddie feels like he’s being pulled to Buck, like there’s a string attached and it’s wrapping around both of them, tightening every second that passes by. His feet move quickly against the cold floor, putting Buck’s drink down next to him. 

“I love everything about your baking.” 

Buck grabs the drink, tilting his head in confusion before he brings the glass up to his lips, taking a few slow gulps. Eddie watches the way his Adam’s apple bobs, how his throat closes around the liquid after every swallow. His body fights the urge to leap forward and attach his lips to Buck’s neck, to feel every muscle move when he swallows under his lips. 

“Have you seen the new spiderman movie?” Buck’s voice is soft, but not in the way it normally is. It’s low in his throat, raspy. Like he’s not afraid of breaking this moment, that he’s secure and knows Eddie is in the palm of his hand. 

“I haven’t. But if Chris finds out we watched it without him I think he might end up calling my parents again.” 

Buck's jaw drops open, a shocked laugh rumbling through his stomach. “Alright, man, that was too soon.” 

“You think it was too soon?” Eddie props his hip against the counter, watching as Buck pulls out the conchas from the oven. 

“You both just came home a few months ago. I’d say it’s still a bit too soon.” Buck’s voice cracks, clearing his throat to try to cover it up. 

Eddie lets out a soft sigh, wrapping a hand around Buck's forearm to stop his movements. The world stops around them, pausing in the presence of their feelings. He rubs soft circles against the hoodie covering Buck’s arm, electricity burning its way through Eddie despite the thick material separating them. 

“Buck. I’m– we’re never leaving you again. It should have never gotten to that point in the first place and I’m sorry. But it won’t ever happen again,” Eddie’s words are gentle but pleading, needing Buck to understand and hear his words. He regrets letting his parents take control of his life like that, to take control and feed his insecurity that he’s not a good father. But he won’t ever let them do it again. He won’t ever let them get between him and Christopher again. 

A sad smile pulls at the corners of Buck’s lips, but it doesn’t bring the twinkle in his eyes that Eddie loves so much. 

“I know.”

Eddie doesn’t push—he doesn’t want to bring up old memories and reopen old wounds. Regret flushes through his body, weighing him down. 

“Hey– I know you did it to get him back. I’m not upset or mad at either of you. You were looking out for your son, and that’s the most courageous thing you could have done. To stand up to your parents like that. I’m really proud of you for doing it, Eddie.” 

Eddie’s love for Buck explodes, engulfing every single atom in his body, his DNA turning into Buck’s, fusing them together as one.

“That– thank you. Seriously, I don’t think you understand how much that means to me, especially coming from you.” 

Buck's eyes drop to Eddie’s lips for a brief moment, something so quick that Eddie has to question if it even happened. The air around them thins out again, the heaviness of their previous conversation floating away. 

“Well, these need about an hour to cool off to fully enjoy. I think we should go smoke another bowl and watch the stars in the back of your truck since you don’t want to watch Spiderman with me.” 

“I can get behind that,” Eddie chuckles. “After you’ve cleaned up your mess, Buckley,” Eddie says, shoving his index finger at Buck’s chest and raising his eyebrow at the taller man in front of him. 

Buck throws his hands up in defence, his eyes going wide as he looks around the kitchen before landing his eyes back on Eddie’s. “Yes sir,” Buck salutes before he makes his way around the kitchen, cleaning up his mess.  

Eddie leans back against the counter again, just watching as Buck cleans every crook and cranny of the kitchen he made a mess in. And in this moment, Eddie realizes that even when Buck gets a future partner, Eddie will always have had him first. He and Chris will always come first, and that satisfies Eddie deeply. No matter the outcome of their relationship, if it never becomes romantic, he’s okay with that. Because Buck has shown Eddie what it feels like to be in love, to feel complete and fulfilled. His life mission is to love Buck, and he’s completed it. The most beautiful boy he’s ever met, the most loving and caring person who would walk through fire for you, owns Eddie’s heart. And Buck deserves that, to be loved the way Eddie can’t seem to stop. 

“Alright, let’s go,” amusement wraps around Buck’s words, bouncing on the balls of his feet. Eddie giggles at him, snatching the bag of goodies they’re about to smoke before they run outside. 

Eddie dumps the bag on the table, grabbing his bowl of choice. He digs any old weed out of it, letting it dust over the ground. He can feel Buck’s intense yet soft gaze on him, burning a hole through his skin. He looks up, meeting the soft eyes staring at him. The look on Buck’s face is something he’s never seen before, something so content and comfortable, so relaxed. He watches Eddie’s every move, sinking further into his chair as he does. 

“Okay, give me something you have smoked before. Because if you give me that demonic ass cursed shit from earlier I’m kicking you out of my house.” 

“Okay– okay,” Buck shuffles through the different bags of weed on the table, reading each label carefully. His tongue pokes out between his lips, pulling out a holographic bag. “I think you’ll like this one. It’ll help relax you and ease pain while giving you the giggles.”

Eddie takes the bag, bringing it up to his nose after he opens it, aromas of blackberry filling his nose. He closes his eyes, letting the fragrance take over his mind. He pulls it away, reading the information on the back. Blackberry moonrocks. 

“I’m feeling very hesitant about trusting you, just so you’re aware,” Eddie says, side-eyeing Buck as he grabs a bud, holding it over the bowl as he crumbles it. He packs it in with his thumb, brushing the edges clean. He snatches the lighter from the table, flicking it to ignite before he takes a deep drag. The smoke burns down his throat, spreading throughout his lungs. He holds his breath, leaning back in his chair to stare at the sky. His eyes don’t water this time, and despite the burn in his throat, it is a lot smoother than the last one.

Eddie tucks his chin to his shoulder, blowing the smoke out behind him. He leans forward, his hands on his knees as he coughs, gasping for air. 

“Well, your reaction is better so I’d like to say I get to stay,” Buck laughs, prying the bowl from Eddie’s hand. 

“It’s–,” Eddie coughs, grabbing his water bottle. “It is better than the last one. I guess you get to stay, I mean you did bake me concha’s. Speaking of, where did you even get that recipe?” He unscrews the cap on his bottle, taking a few sips. 

Eddie watches as Buck brings the bowl up to his mouth, wrapping his lips around the glass. He lights the lighter, taking a large hit once again. He swallows after the smoke, tucking his face into his elbow as he coughs. Amusement courses through Eddie’s body, relaxation soothing deep into his bones. 

“I got it from Abuela. She was more than happy to give it to me.”  

“How come she’s so willing to give you recipes?” Eddie frowns, pouting to himself, which earns a laugh to break out from Buck. 

“Probably because you suck at cooking, Eddie,” Buck's words are light, jabbing at Eddie in a teasingly infatuated way. 

Eddie gasps, holding a hand up to his mouth in over exaggeration. His eyes widen, dancing over Buck's face before he responds. 

“How dare you!” Eddie grabs a pack of swishers, throwing it at Buck’s face. Buck tries to dodge them, but fails as they smack him right in the center of his forehead. They fall into a fit of laughter, joy and happiness pouring out of both of them. 

“How ironic is it that we wear protective gear to protect our lungs from smoke just for us to come home and ruin them with it anyways.” Eddie stares up at the sky for a few moments before he looks back down at Buck. 

Buck sinks into his chair once he stops laughing, catching Eddie’s eye, holding the contact. Admiration is drawn on his face, his eyes droopy, and a lazy smile makes its way across his lips. 

“Yeah, literally. It's basically the definition of ironic.” 

They fall into a comfortable silence, soaking in the warm, nighttime air. The longer Eddie stares at Buck, the harder he has to prevent himself from crawling into his lap, curling up and plopping down like a cat. Instead, he speaks up, trying to distract his mind. 

“I think we should run inside to grab some blankets and pillows before we move to the truck.” 

Buck takes a quick sip of his own water, nodding as he puts the cap back on it. “I like your way of thinking, Diaz.” 

They both pack up the weed on the table, giggling as they sneak into the house. They both shush each other despite the house being empty. They collect a handful of blankets and pillows, chasing each other out of the house like little kids. 

Buck takes the blankets from Eddie’s arms, throwing them across the bed of his pickup truck. He tosses the pillows on top, moving them around until he’s satisfied. He holds out his hand for Eddie to grab onto, his head slightly tilted as a soft smirk creeps into his cheeks. 

“Kind sir,” Buck speaks in a shitty British accent, causing a laugh to escape Eddie’s mouth. He grabs onto Buck's hand, their fingers intertwining. His other hand grabs the side of his truck, pulling himself up. He falls into the padded bed, staring up at Buck as he follows suit.

They both shift around each other, almost like they’re afraid of touching too closely or for too long, afraid of crossing the line between friends and more.  

“Do you ever wonder what your life would be like if you changed a simple decision?” Eddie’s voice is soft, scared almost. 

Buck is quiet for a few beats before he answers. “All the time,” his voice matches Eddie’s tone, staying quiet, staying between themselves. 

“Do you regret anything?” Eddie turns his head to stare at Buck, watching as he takes a deep breath in, licking his lips. 

“There’s a lot of things I regret,” Buck turns his head to meet Eddie’s eyes. “But, I wouldn’t change a thing from where I’m at now.” 

“So if you had the chance to fix everything, you wouldn’t change anything?” 

“If it meant I wouldn’t have you and Chris, or the 118, no, I wouldn’t change anything. All of my mistakes brought me here.” 

Eddie turns his head to look back up at the sky, his heart thumping harshly in his chest. A cold breeze brushes over them, sending a shiver down Eddie’s spine. He feels Buck shift next to him, lifting his arm above both their heads. 

“C’mere. You’re shivering.”

Eddie doesn’t move, his body stoned to the bed of his truck. He shakes his head, his stomach swooping in butterflies of both fear and affection. 

“Oh no I’m oka–,” before he can finish, he feels a strong arm wrap around him, pulling him into Buck’s stern side. He’s pressed flush against Buck’s body, heat radiating off him like the sun. 

Eddie’s brain melts, pouring out of his ears. Buck's strength goes straight to his head and between his legs, heat spreading through his thighs. His brain short-circuits when he tries to speak, not having any control over his words. 

“You’re so strong,” Eddie squeaks out, mentally face-palming himself. 

Buck’s body vibrates under Eddie’s as he laughs, his arm tightening around Eddie’s body. 

“That is kind of part of our job, Eddie.” Eddie can hear the smirk curving around Buck’s words, them dripping with sweet sugar. 

“Well– I know, but it’s just different actually being on the receiving end.” Eddie isn’t making this any better for himself, and he wishes he could just sew his lips shut, that he could knock on his head to turn his brain back on. “Like you’re making me feel like a rag doll. Something so easy to throw around.”

Buck chokes out a sound that could be a laugh, coughing as he turns away from Eddie. Confusion spreads over Eddie’s body, looking up at Buck. 

“What’s so funny?” Eddie props himself up on an elbow, looking down at Buck. 

“Nothing I just–,” Buck pauses, finally meeting Eddie’s eyes again. “Do you realize how that sounded?” 

Eddie repeats the words in his head, trying to figure out what Buck meant when it finally dawns on him. Panic rises in his throat, shaking his head. 

“Okay, wait– that – no, okay, that is not how I meant it.” Eddie stumbles over his words, lying straight through his teeth. Sweat prickles at his now overheated skin, beading at his hairline and under his arms. 

“I mean hey, if you ever want to be thrown around I’ll do it for you.” Buck's words are genuine, innocent. Or at least that’s what Eddie’s convincing himself it is. 

“Yeah, man, I am not answering that. Thanks for the offer though.” Eddie sinks back into Buck’s side, relaxing into the comfort of his warm, stern yet soft body. Silence trickles over them once again as they just appreciate each other's company. 

“The stars are beautiful here, but nothing compares to what they look like in El Paso.” Eddie whispers, sighing deeper into Buck’s side. He doesn’t know if he’ll ever get to be this close again, and he’s going to take advantage of the little time he has. 

Buck’s arm tightens around him, squeezing his hand on the flesh of Eddie’s back. “Yeah?”  

Eddie nods, putting an arm over Buck's, their hands tying together. “Yeah. I’ll have to take you, someday.” 

Eddie can feel Buck shift under him, turning his head to look at Eddie. “I’d go anywhere you take me.” Buck’s words hit deeply, soaking into every pore of Eddie’s body. Buck would go anywhere with him if he asked? Would he have come with Eddie to El Paso before if he’d just grown up and asked? The answer is right in front of him, floating in the air as it suffocates Eddie. He doesn’t answer, just falling into a silence. 

——

This turns into a routine for Buck and Eddie. After a long shift, they go to Eddie’s house, smoke weed, and then bake. Until one day, Eddie breaks that routine. 

“Hey, how would you feel if I joined in on a video with you?” Eddie sinks into Buck’s couch, fiddling with his thumbs as he waits for Buck's response. 

Buck looks up from his laptop, pausing his editing. Shock is plastered all over him, like it’s the last thing he ever expected to hear Eddie ask. 

“I– well I wouldn’t mind. And you’re already a fan favourite being behind the camera, so they wouldn’t mind either,” a few beats pass before Buck continues. “Are you sure? I’m not– I hope you know I’m not expecting you to make content with me or, or that I’m upset that you’re not. I understand if you don’t want to, really.”

“I want to, Buck. I’ve never felt pressured or anything, it just seems like it could be fun.” Eddie looks up from his hands, his eyes meeting Buck's bright blue irises. “From your reaction though it seems like you don't want to have me in a video.” 

“No that’s– I just wouldn’t want to make you uncomfortable or do something you don’t want to. I want to make sure you’re okay with it.” Buck sets his laptop down next to him, leaning forward on his knees. 

“I wouldn’t do something I don’t want to,” Eddie tilts his head, furrowing his eyebrows. 

Buck chuckles to himself, shaking his head softly. “Eddie you are the biggest people pleasing bitch I’ve ever met. You absolutely would do something for somebody if it pleased them even if you didn’t want to.” 

Eddie opens his mouth before he snaps it shut, his eyes searching Buck's face as a chill makes its way down his body, feeling way too exposed and perceived right now. 

“Call me out like that again and I’m going to kick you out.”

Buck places his laptop over his lap again, clicking around as he continues his editing. “This is my apartment?”

“It doesn’t matter, you’ll listen to anything I tell you anyways. Let’s talk about your people pleasing. Or is it just ‘I need to please Eddie’?” Eddie snaps back, a joking tone laced in his words. 

Buck's head lifts from his laptop, slowly tracing his eyes over to Eddie. He doesn’t speak, but his eyes are saying a million words. Eddie knows he just dug deep, and he hopes that Buck knows he’s not trying to be an ass. If anything, he enjoys how Buck would do anything for him; it’s something that nobody else has ever been willing to do. 

“Say that again and you’ll be out of my apartment.” Buck raises his eyebrow, begging for Eddie to say something else. His face is soft, showcasing the lightheartedness of his words. 

Eddie snaps his mouth shut, nodding before humming a soft ‘mhm’. He clears his throat when words try to claw their way out, begging to have the last word and keep going. 

“Anyways, if you’re actually serious about being in a video, I’m down. As long as you’re absolutely okay with it and understand what that means for you and what it’ll bring to your table.” 

Eddie thinks about it for a second, running through all the scenarios that could happen. Nobody knows his own personal account, and even if they did, it’s a burner/lurker. It doesn’t have any personal information on it. Could people find Eddie’s full name on the internet? It’s a possibility, but he feels like it would be pretty difficult. Christopher wouldn’t be anywhere near the videos, and hopefully won’t even know about them. 

“Yeah, I’m serious. Maybe you can teach me some things,” Eddie shrugs, trying not to think about how close they’ll be, how Buck might end up wrapping his arms around Eddie’s body to show him how to do something properly. His mind jumps to purposely screwing up just to see if Buck would do that, engulfing Eddie’s entire body with his own. 

Eddie takes note of the smirk that twitches at Buck’s lips, his eyes flicking to Eddie before they land back on the laptop screen. 

“Yeah, we can work that out. Although, you do have to listen to me. Can you do that?” Seduction is laced in Buck’s words, sending waves of heat and then cold shivers through Eddie’s body. 

“Yeah– yeah, I can.. I can be good,” Eddie nods. His breathing picks up, his chest rising and falling quicker with each moving moment, and he thinks about their now planned video together. 

——

After Eddie finds himself back home, he buries himself in bed, tucked away in his blankets, before he pulls his phone out. He does his nightly scroll on TikTok, relaxing further into his mattress with every crackle, chew, and crunch of a new ASMR video. His thumbs fiddle over the screen, circling each other as he bites on his bottom lip. 

He types in Buck’s user, clicking on the profile that pops up. A smile sneaks its way on his face when he’s met with the beautiful man on his screen. He clicks on a recent video, giggling to himself as softness fills his body. Buck is once again covered in flour, his hair a curly mess, and his eyes are the brightest he’s ever seen them. 

Eddie just stares, wishes, wants. The unrealistic part of him wonders, wants, and dreams about what it would be like to live with Evan Buckley, to be his forever, to love and to hold through sickness and health. He thinks about how it probably wouldn’t feel much different than it does right now, the domestics of it all. His body longs for the other part, the physical. To feel Buck touch him whenever they wanted, to kiss him and love him and–

Eddie closes his eyes, taking a deep breath through his nose before he opens them again. He is not about to think about all of Buck's previous sex stories and get himself worked up imagining it was him. 

He clicks on the comments, admiration filling his body as he likes all the comments supporting and showing love to Buck. He can’t imagine how fulfilling this has to be for Buck, to an extent, to have people love him and want more of what he has to offer, and Eddie couldn’t be happier for him. 

He slows down his scrolling when he sees a few comments that aren’t the standard love or hate comment. His eyes race over them, his heart beating faster in his chest. 

@paralove90: god buck looks so love sick sometimes it makes me sick to my stomach 

‪@spaceyquill‬: the way they both bicker like an old married couple SENDS me. 

@BucksVersion: I am begging to know what Eddie looks like. Just from the voice alone I’m seeing circles. No wonder Buck does too. 

Eddie stares at them for a few seconds, furrowing his eyebrows. What are these people even talking about? He and Shannon have never acted this way with each other, and they were married. He and Buck are friends; they’ve always been like this. Maybe they just haven’t seen a comfortable male relationship before? 

Eddie shakes his head, closing the app before he puts his phone down on the bed. He stares at the ceiling, his mind running in circles about what they could have meant. He tries his best not to think too deeply about it until he’s able to bring himself to sleep. 

——

A few days later, Buck and Eddie both find themselves in front of Buck's phone, aprons tied tightly around their waists. Buck has on another hoodie, baggy around his waist but tight over his shoulders. Eddie catches himself staring, not being able to drag his heavy-lidded eyes away from Buck. 

“– and today we have a VERY special guest,” a huge smile takes up Buck's entire face, not being able to contain the joyful rays of sunshine seeping out of him. “Today, we have my good friend Eddie joining us!”

Buck takes a step to the side, grabbing Eddie’s elbow to bring him more into center camera. Eddie stumbles over his feet, falling into the counter. He feels strong arms grab at his waist, pulling him back up until he’s steady again. His face burns, threatening to melt right off. Once he’s back on his own two feet, he gives the camera a little wave, an embarrassed smile cracking its way to his lips. 

“This is his first time, everybody be nice and patient with him. He might be a little shy,” Buck points towards the camera, his face growing serious and his voice stern. 

Eddie stays more to the side, letting Buck take control of everything that’s happening. He stares at the bowl in front of him, consisting of cool whip and vanilla. The spatula in his hand stared back up at him. He raises an eyebrow, his heart fluttering in his chest as he dips the utensil in the bowl. He takes a deep breath, starting to stir it slowly. 

“Hey Buck? Is this how you’re supposed to be mixing this?” Eddie tilts his head, looking towards Buck. Buck lifts his own head from what he’s doing, his eyes dropping to the way Eddie is treating the icing. His face drops, shaking his head as he gasps. 

“Oh my god Eddie no!” He shoves himself off the counter, quickly finding himself behind Eddie, towering over him. Eddie can feel the heat radiating off of Buck, consuming every single part of Eddie’s body. The oxygen around him is laced with the scent of Buck, running through his bloodstream, the very thing beating his heart. “You have to fold it–,” Buck pauses, wrapping his arms around Eddie’s body. His chest is flush against Eddie’s back, soft and welcoming him in. He covers Eddie’s hands with his own, guiding him with every fold of the icing they’re making. “Just like this,” Buck's voice is soft, his lips brushing over the shell of Eddie’s ear. 

Eddie can’t think, and he can’t fucking breathe. Every moment, every second, all he can think of is Buck, how good he feels against him, how big he is compared to Eddie, how soft and gentle he is despite his size. He touches Eddie in a way he’s never felt before, so softly but full of care and concern. 

He melts back into the feeling of a strong, soft chest behind him, his eyes fluttering closed for a few seconds. Eddie can’t help the smirk that fights across his face, quick and deep, before he clears his throat, fluttering his eyelashes at Buck when he turns around to look at him. 

“Thank you. I guess abuela has a valid reason to refuse giving me recipes,” Eddie chuckles, looking back down at the bowl in front of him. His hands are shaking, his body burning like lava has replaced his blood from his veins, scorching everything in its path. 

“I told you, you can't cook for shit,” Buck's words are daring, teasing. Like they're testing how far they can go, to see how far Eddie will let Buck get. 

Eddie opens and closes his mouth like a fish out of water, offense coursing through him like a dare, adrenaline buzzing through his veins like he’s drunk. He looks at the camera for a second, just staring in shock, before he turns back to face Buck. His free hand lands on his hip, the other pointing the spatula at Buck. 

“I will not tolerate being bullied in my own kitchen that I pay for. Pack it up, Buck.” Eddie’s words come out sharper than intended, his face stoning over in seriousness. Buck stands up straight, tilting his head to the side before he smiles, taking a step forward to tower over Eddie once again. 

“Or what?” Buck's voice is sweet like honey, but something fiery brushes over his words, something deeper. His eyes drop down to the spatula that’s pointing in his face, bending over to lick it clean of cool whip. His eyes find their way back up to Eddie’s as his tongue laps around the silicone, his eye contact never fading. When he’s satisfied with his work, he pulls himself back up straight, smirking down at Eddie like he knows exactly what he just did. 

Eddie’s brain short-circuits, standing there dazed as he stares at Buck in front of him. His words get stuck in his throat, heat spreading over his stomach and down his thighs like a wildfire. He starts to feel dizzy, like there’s so much adrenaline running through him that he can’t even function properly. Buck is going to be the death of Eddie, pleasantly passed away in his grave, forever picturing Buck's lips wrapped around the spatula. 

“Well I– you’re not going to– you can–,” Eddie’s words are cut short by the sound of a deep chuckle rumbling through Buck’s chest. Buck's once sky-blue eyes darken like the midnight sky, his pupils dilating to the point there’s only a sliver of blue showing. 

“Cat got your tongue, Eddie?” Buck props a hip against the counter, every single sense being invaded by Buck. It’s all he can see, feel, hear, and even taste. 

“No, but I’m about to have yours,” Eddie reaches behind him, pinching up some flour in his fingers before he throws it at Buck. The powder spreads out over the other man’s face, sprinkling into a fade. 

Buck jumps back in surprise, his eyes squeezing shut. A loud gasp fills the room, silence and anticipation flooding the ground around them. Buck's eyes snap back open, his jaw dropping before he picks up a handful of flour, an evil smile taking place over his face. 

Eddie backs away, his eyes widening with fear behind them. He shakes his head, his skin starting to sweat. 

“Buck– Buck, no. That’s– c'mon man that’s not even COMPARABLE to what I did,” Eddie tries to beg, to reason. Despite the fear on his face, his body feels like it’s floating on cloud nine, and his mind can’t help but trick himself into thinking this is what his life would look like with Buck as his lover. 

With every inch Buck moves in closer, the more excitement spikes through Eddie’s skin, over his body and clouding his mind. He takes baby steps back, his eyes never leaving Buck's. He can see the handful of flour in Buck's hand from the corner of his eye, dusting off into the air to cover the ground. 

“You will be deep cleaning this entire kitchen if you throw that at me, Buckley. I swear to go–,” before he knows it, flour floods Eddie’s mouth, causing him to cough, hunching over the counter to spit it out. He gasps for air, heaving as the disgusting taste takes over his attention.

Buck breaks out into a fit of painful-sounding laughter, sending vibrations down Eddie’s body, buzzing through his veins, pulsing to his heart. Eddie can’t even force himself to be mad when Buck sounds like this, like the sun itself gave birth to him and handed him all the light it could bear. 

Eddie’s jaw hangs open as he breathes deeply, staring at the man in front of him. Ways to retaliate flood his mind, spinning in circles until he’s dizzy. 

“Evan Buckley, you are fucked,” Eddie threatens, taking a step towards Buck. He snatches the bowl of frosting he was just working on, his eyebrows furrowing in concentration, an evil smirk making its way over his delicate features. 

He watches as the light dims from Buck's eyes, replaced with fear. Buck shakes his head, taking a few steps back. Eddie dips his finger into the frosting, popping it in his mouth as he inches closer to the other man, the flavour melting over his tongue. He pulls his finger out with a loud pop, holding the bowl in front of his body. 

“Eddie– hey man, we can absolutely talk about this. Stay away from me with that–,” Buck begs, his back hitting the counter. His hands land on the edges, gripping the counter tightly. “You better not do what I think you’re about to do with that, Eddie.” 

“Awe, or what?” Eddie stops right in front of Buck, caging him in against the counter. He tilts his head, looking up through his eyelashes. His eyes dance over Buck's face, watching as emotions flood his mind. He waits for a response to see if Buck is going to try to break his way out of this. He very easily could, with how much stronger and bigger he is than Eddie. 

Buck tries to snatch the bowl, tilting it until some of it spills over and onto Eddie’s apron. Eddie takes a step back, pulling the bowl to his stomach. He stares at the white frosting dripping down his stomach, blinking slowly, trying to comprehend what just happened. His eyes shoot up when he hears shuffling in front of him, watching as Buck tries to escape. 

Eddie tisks, shaking his head before he lunges forward, dropping the bowl on top of Buck’s head. The thick substance drips from Buck's head onto his shoulders, spreading down his chest and back. Buck is frozen in place, his hands mid-air to try and stop the bowl from landing on him. Eddie covers his mouth, his eyes wide, before he shouts out a laugh. He takes a step back, holding his stomach as it rumbles with laughter, pure joy spilling out of Eddie. 

“Oh you think this is funny?” Buck's voice echoes from the bowl, taking it off his head before he sets it on the counter. His curls are plastered down on his head, drenched in cool whip. 

“Yeah, I think this is hilarious, actually,” Eddie says, standing up straight, wiping a few stray tears from his eyes. He watches as Buck moves, waiting to see if there’s any sign of discomfort or Buck being upset. 

Before he knows what’s happening, a pair of strong hands grabs his face, sending a shock of electricity down Eddie’s spine. Buck tilts his head forward, shoving his gooey-covered hair against Eddie’s face, transferring the mess to him. Eddie gasps loudly, his hands flying up to Buck's chest, trying to shove him away. His strength weakens with every laugh that bubbles out of him, rays of sunshine pouring out of both of them and blurring together as one, 

“Buck get off of me,” Eddie squeals, his hands roaming over Buck's entire chest and stomach. If Eddie uses this time to trace and feel over every curve, every bulge, and every line of Buck's muscles, nobody has to know that except for him.  

“Look at the mess you’ve made of me, Eddie.” Disappointment rings through Buck's words, pulling himself away to stand up straight. Eddie’s eyes travel over Buck's face, the curve of his jaw up to the lines in his forehead. His face and hair are covered in cool whip, dripping down his cheeks and off his chin. Buck's eyes droop low, never breaking the contact with Eddie’s. 

Eddie feels like Buck is sucking him in closer, like a force is tying them around each other, refusing to let go. Their air gets stuck in his throat, burning through his lungs with each passing second.

“You like it,” the words spill out of him before he has the time to stop them, not being able to control them. He watches as Buck’s eyes drop down to his lips, quickly moving across the rest of his face. 

“Mm, maybe I do,” Buck sticks his tongue out between his lips, wetting them. Eddie’s hand slides down Buck's chest, falling to his side. 

“Okay, well our cake isn’t going to have any frosting on it, I guess. And I have to go take a shower and get this shit off of me as soon as possible before I freak out. You can use my bathroom, I’ll use the one in the hallway. We’ll clean this up later.” Eddie backs away, sending a smile Buck’s way before he makes his way out of the kitchen.

——

Eddie has, of course, become the fan favorite, even more than Buck. Every video he appears in, the more viral they go. The fans have even given them a ship name, calling them buddie every time they’re spoken about at the same time. It’s almost like their individuality has been stripped from them, and they are now just known as one. Eddie has zero complaints about that—if anything, he loves it. 

Every day, he waits for Buck to say something about it, either to him or the fans. To shut it down, make a statement about how they’re just friends, but it never comes. The more time that passes, the more confused Eddie becomes, trying to figure out if Buck actually has any form of feelings or if it’s his love-sick brain playing tricks on him. At the end of every confused, mind fucking battle with himself, he always comes to terms with his love-sick mind just playing tricks on him. 

Eddie watches as Buck finishes cleaning up the kitchen, packing away all of the baking ingredients, and drying off the last dish. 

“You’d make a great house husband, by the way,” Eddie pops a cherry in his mouth, chewing around the seed. His body is still light, still floating around the kitchen from his devil's activity with Buck earlier. His body relaxes into his chair, soaking in the silence he’s now found himself in with Buck. 

Buck puts the dish towel down, turning around before he tilts his head. “What?” His words come out light, a confused laughter sounding around each letter. He leans back against the sink, folding his arms together over his chest. 

Somehow, a huge mess wasn’t made this time. Buck's curls were still intact, clean from any flour or batter. They fall gently over his forehead, leading down to his piercing blue eyes. Just as always, Buck is glowing in the dimly lit kitchen. His skin is cast in a burnt orange, the light peaking through his hair, hugging Buck just right. His sweatshirt is rolled up to his elbows, showing his tattoos that drive Eddie crazy. He looks like a god, like somebody from an upper power came down and kissed him right on the forehead, blessing him with infinite beauty. 

There’s a look in his eyes, one that Eddie has taken notice of over the past few weeks, but can never figure out what it is. It’s soft, softer than it ever was before. There’s a new calmness that surrounds Buck, something that is easily transferable to Eddie whenever he’s feeling off or anxious about something. 

“You cook, clean, do the dishes and laundry. You even get groceries and you don’t even live here. The perfect house husband,” Eddie nods innocently like he didn’t just say something fucking crazy. 

Buck is silent for a few moments, just staring. Eddie can see the cloud of questions forming above Buck's head, his eyebrows frowning as his head tilts further. 

“Don’t think too much into it, Buck. Don’t want to hurt that pretty brain of yours.”

Their eyes finally meet, a forcefield keeping them in place. The air around them grows thick, something that’s been happening a lot between them recently. 

“Well, in order to be a house husband, I would need to be a husband,” Buck rolls his eyes, his face breaking out into a smile. Eddie has to bite his tongue, hold himself back from saying something that can’t be changed or taken back. 

“Do you want to be a househusband?” Eddie stands up from the table, bringing the bag of cherries back to the fridge. He turns away from Buck, wetting his lips with his tongue as he waits for an answer. 

“Well, I mean– I don’t think so? I enjoy what I do for work way too much to fully be a house husband. I would never be able to commit fully to the title.”

Eddie takes a few moments to answer, nodding before he closes the fridge, turning back around. Their eyes meet once again, dark brown forest meeting bright blue oceans. It feels like, despite their differences, they were always meant to meet, like magnets drawing them in further together, never being able to separate for too long. 

Before Eddie can speak, Buck beats him to it. “You could also be a great house husband.” Playfulness fills the air around them. Neither of their conversations runs seriously, just poking fun at the other. 

Eddie stands there, dumbfounded as he stares at Buck. “Coming from somebody who says my cooking is shit,” Eddie lets out a shocked laugh, shaking his head as he watches Buck sit down, starting to edit some older videos. “That’s unfortunately a pretty big part of being a house husband.” He takes a spot next to Buck, their knees touching. Electricity makes its way through Eddie’s veins, burning their skin together, mending them as one. 

Buck looks up from his phone, his eyes big and round, playfulness swimming around in the deep blue oceans. The newfound comfort surrounding them is something Eddie could live the rest of his life with. To be carried away in his casket. 

“Cmon, man. I’m only just messing with you. I think it’s funny to continue to tease you even though you’ve proven time and time again you’re getting better.”

Eddie nudges Buck’s shoulder with his own, licking his lips as a smile sinks into his cheeks. “You just like cooking for me, don’t you?”

“I fear I just like cooking,” Buck shrugs his shoulders, turning his attention back to his phone. 

Eddie rolls his eyes, standing up from his chair. “Whatever,” he huffs, starting to make his way out of the kitchen. “I’m headed to bed, and I suggest you do the same. You look exhausted.” 

“Baking with you is exhausting,” the sly smirk on Buck's face says otherwise, ducking as Eddie throws a pen at him. 

“You’re a real piece of work, you know that?” 

“I don’t hear you complaining,” Buck puts his phone down, standing up from his chair. 

“And I wouldn’t change a thing. Goodnight, Buck,” Eddie turns around, throwing a hand over his shoulder in a small, awkward wave. 

Eddie closes his bedroom door behind him, falling against it, holding himself still for a few moments. The wood is cold and smooth, almost feeling like a burn against his heated skin. His head rolls to the side, a goofy smile dancing over his face. He’s never felt so good, so happy and content with somebody in his life before, so at peace with himself. 

He stumbles his way over to the bed, stripping his clothes off before he climbs in. He sinks into the soft, fluffy comforter, feeling like a cloud has swallowed him whole. His head spins every time he closes his eyes, waves of darkness overtaking his vision. 

Eddie shuffles around his bed until he’s comfortable, bundling himself up in a cocoon of soft, airy blankets. He pulls his phone out to open TikTok, his fingers automatically clicking the search bar and typing in Buck’s name. He clicks on the latest video, his body melting further into the mattress as Buck’s honey-like voice covers his ears and his brain in sweet sugar. 

He opens the comments, liking a few that have screenshot their videos and used them as reaction memes. His eyes stop when they get to the questioning comments, always wondering if the two are just friends or more. 

‪@halo_ween17‬: I think they did it but I just can’t prove it

‪@_failedlobotomy‬: Buck is OBSESSED with Eddie. I mean, I get it but damn. fit, a firefighter, pretty, AND has a hot boyfriend? This is the greed they talk about in the bible. 

‪@MustacheEddie1‬: they know it’s legal right…?

‪@INanyCASE13‬: come back to me when the trope turns from friends to lovers

‪@Morbid__Mutt‬: the way Buck looks at Eddie… oh I know what you are. I hope to find love like this 

‪@edsslutstrand‬: you guys are genuinely so cute. The way you look at each other is just the kind of love you see in fairy tales. 

Eddie freezes, the air getting caught in his throat, burning venom through his veins and to his heart. His body goes cold, stoning over in bed. He rereads every comment, spelling out the words before he slowly sits up—panic courses through his body, beginning to tremble from the force of it.

Are they trying to say Buck is in love with Eddie? They can’t be, right? Eddie would know. Yeah, Eddie would absolutely know if his best friend shared the same feelings… right? If Buck is in love with Eddie, why haven’t they gotten together? What’s been stopping them? Does Buck think Eddie is a terrible boyfriend? Sure, he has a track record, but that was with women. Of course, it would be different with men. It would be different with Buck. 

Eddie looks around his room, panic threatening to bubble out of his throat and over his mattress. His eyes land on the door, trying to magically burn it down to the ground. His body itches to get up, to make his way through the house, and to the couch where he knows Buck lies. 

He rakes a hand through his hair, tugging softly. His breathing grows deep, breathing in through his nose and out through his mouth. Eddie closes his eyes, trying to imagine all of the times maybe Buck has looked at him in a way he’s never been able to determine what it meant. Every time, he lands on being in love. 

Eddie throws his covers off himself, swinging his legs over the bed to sit on the edge. His head drops to his hands, his mind running in circles. Of course, Buck wouldn’t make a move on Eddie if he’s actually in love with him—he still thinks Eddie is straight. Everything makes sense, of course it does. 

The next time Eddie blinks, he finds himself in the kitchen, not even remembering how he got there. His mind is racing, his heartbeat throbbing throughout his body, thumping so loudly in his ears it’s become deafening. He’s startled by a familiar voice breaking him out of his panic. 

“Eddie? What are you still doing up?” Buck's words are slow and raspy, dripping with sleep. 

Eddie jumps, holding a hand over his chest as he turns around to face the other man. His eyes trail up Buck's body ever so slowly until their eyes finally meet. The tension between them is so strong it’s suffocating. 

“I couldn’t sleep, I just– I just needed a glass of water.” Eddie feels like his mouth isn’t working, like it’s stuffed with cotton, and he’s trying to speak around it.

Buck doesn’t move, his eyes intense as they roam over Eddie’s body. Like he’s waiting, trying to catch Eddie slacking, to see if he’ll crack and open up. Buck folds his arms over his chest, leaning his hip against the counter, his eyebrow raised. His features are soft and droopy, covered in sleep. His eyes aren’t as bright, the blue dulling out to a softer grey. Eddie shuffles uncomfortably under the intense gaze, his eyes dropping to the floor. 

“Well, are you going to get some water?” Concern swims in Buck’s voice, sending a new wave of panic down Eddie’s throat. 

Eddie feels like he can’t move, like he’s stuck in time with Buck watching his every move. Watching in case he breaks. 

“Yeah– yeah, duh,” He nods, forcing a laugh before he turns around, grabbing a glass from the cabinet. His hands are trembling as they bring the glass down to the counter, biting his bottom lip between his teeth as he focuses on not dropping it.

Eddie hears a few creaks in the floor, the sound so loud it sends waves of anxiety through his body. A pair of hands wrap around Eddie’s wrists, pulling them away from the glass. A hard chest is pressed flush against his back, Buck towering over him from behind. He can feel Buck’s soft breathing fanning over his neck, shallow and hot. 

“Eddie.. What's going on? I can feel your anxiety from across the house.” Buck's words are quiet, His hands trailing up Eddie's forearms until they stop at his elbows. 

“Nothing I’m just– I don’t actually know what’s wrong,” Eddie laughs, lying straight through his teeth. “I’m just having a hard night, that’s all. It came out of nowhere.” 

Buck pulls at Eddie’s arms, turning him around so they’re facing each other. Eddie drops his gaze, looking anywhere but Buck’s eyes. He feels a finger hook under his jaw, lifting his head so their eyes finally connect. Eddie's heart soars through his chest, threatening to spill from his throat. Buck's eyes dance over Eddie's face, his eyebrows furrowed with concern. Silence surrounds them like a death chamber, suffocating both of them until there’s no more fresh air left to breathe. A few moments pass before Buck finally breaks the silence, his hand dropping to his side as he takes a baby step back. 

“You would tell me if something was wrong, right?” There’s fear that’s woven through Buck's words, like he’s begging Eddie to let him in, like he’s afraid that this might be another person abandoning him. 

Eddie takes a deep, shaky breath, nodding softly. “Of course I would,” the air falls into another deafening silence, unasked questions and unanswered thoughts floating in the atmosphere around them. 

Buck nods, licking his lips as he backs away from Eddie, giving him the room to take the first full breath of air since he entered the kitchen. Buck is about to turn around to walk back to the couch before Eddie stops him. 

“You– you would tell me if something changed between us, right? Good or bad?” The words feel like they’re sticking to Eddie's throat, refusing to come out. 

Buck freezes, his broad shoulders rising and falling with each breath he takes. His face gets flushed, his birthmark darkening to a ruby red. 

“Yeah,” Buck pauses, and Eddie waits to see if he continues. Watches the way his face turns and his eyes dart around the kitchen before landing back on Eddie. 

“Okay, I’m glad to hear that,” Eddie nods, sending a soft smile Buck’s way. “I’m sorry if I woke you up. You should get back to bed,” Eddie turns back around, grabbing the glass before he shuffles over to the fridge. He pulls it open, grabbing the pitcher of water to fill his glass. 

Eddie can feel Buck’s presence lingering, like he’s waiting, wanting to push further. The energy in the room has shifted to something awkward, something scarce. A few moments pass before Eddie can hear shuffling behind him, the floorboard creaking as Buck turns and starts to walk away. 

Eddie closes the fridge behind him, rushing to his room before he falls against his closed door. He inhales deeply, the cold air burning against his throat like poison. 

He replays their interaction for the rest of the night, his dreams being consumed by it. 

——

It’s been two weeks since Eddie had his panic attack, and it’s been two weeks since they’ve talked about it. They’ve moved on and continued with their weekly videos, continuing to blow up and go more viral with every post. 

“So I’ve been thinking,” Buck sticks his tongue out, fighting with a holographic bag to get it open. 

“That’s never a good sign,” Eddie laughs, watching with soft, amused eyes.

Buck's eyes shoot up at him, his cheeks glowing pink. “Okay– rude,” his words are light, a laugh bubbling from his chest. “Since I’ve passed the follower limit to go live, I was thinking of trying it out.” Buck finally rips open the bag, his eyes dropping back down to what he’s doing. He digs a nug out before he seals it back up. “And I was wondering if you’d want to join me?” Buck raises his head, his eyes meeting Eddie's. They’re squinting back at him from the bright light, the blue glowing under the harsh rays of the sun. 

Eddie pulls apart the grinder in front of him, picking the weed from between Buck's fingers. He breaks it up into smaller pieces before he shoves it between the teeth of the grinder. 

“That sounds.. interesting. Do you think they’ll be able to handle us unedited?” Eddie screws the grinder together, watching as Buck pulls out a box of rolling papers from his bag. 

“I mean, we’re not that different, are we?” He tilts his head, folding up the filter for Eddie. 

“Well, no. I suppose not,” Eddie licks his fingers, pulling out a single rolling paper. He lays it flat on the table, unscrewing the grinder before he pours the weed in the center of it, aromas of mango filling his nose. “They’ll just see how annoying you are, I guess.” Eddie giggles as a foot meets his shin, pulling his leg up to fold under his other knee. 

“They’ll get to see how fucking bratty you are,” Buck rolls his eyes, leaning his head back with his eyes closed. 

Eddie stares, soaking in the beauty that’s sitting in front of him. He doesn’t know if he’ll ever get over the intense beauty Buck portrays, like an old sculpted Greek statue come to life. Buck's beauty is the type that people used to go to war for, and he understands because he’d be on the front lines if he had to be. 

“They’ll get to see how bratty you are,” Eddie mocks, moving his hand to mimic somebody talking. He spreads the ground-up flower evenly across the paper, picking it up before he folds it in half. He rolls the two sheets together, creating a perfect cylinder shape. 

“What kind is this?” Eddie looks at Buck, his eyebrow quirking as he waits for an answer. Buck cracks an eye open to look back at Eddie, it sparkling with softness and relaxation. 

“Mango kush. It does give you the munchies so maybe we should pre order some food to have by the time we’re flying around on cloud nine.” 

Eddie nods, licking his lips before he speaks up again. “Could you hand me the–,” before he could finish, Buck was already leaning over his chair with the pre-folded filter in his hand. 

“Have you seriously never rolled a joint before?” Judgement seeps into Eddie’s words, striking Buck in the chest. 

“No,” Buck leans forward, watching as Eddie’s fingers dance around delicately to roll the joint. “Well– never successfully. Something about them I just– they always break or they’re not packed enough. I don’t know, man. They’re my biggest downfall.” 

“Mmm, and who looks like the rookie now?” Eddie smirks, a soft laugh filling the air around them as he sticks his tongue out, swiping it across the thin paper to seal it together. He grabs a lighter, flicking it to ignite before he hovers and waves the joint over it to dry the papers together. 

“What did I say? Brat,” Buck snatches the joint from Eddie’s fingers, twirling it between his own. He tucks it behind his ear, folding his arms over his chest as he leans back in his chair. He raises an eyebrow, looking off into the distance. 

“Buck what the hell are you doing?” Eddie closes the grinder, pushing it away from him. 

“Do I look like one of those eighties films where the ‘bad boy’ has the cigarette behind his ear as he stares off into the distance?” Buck’s smile is blinding, sending rays of sunshine to shine over Eddie, to light him up from the inside out. 

“The words you and looking like the bad boy do not go together, my guy. Sorry to burst your bubble,” Eddie leans forward, flicking the joint from behind his ear, watching as it falls down into his lap. 

“You just don’t see the vision,” Buck shakes his head, picking up the joint between his index finger and thumb. He leans forward, grabbing the lighter that lies in Eddie’s lap. His fingers brush over Eddie’s thigh, sending a buzzing heat through his body like a hot flash. 

“You’re right, I don’t. You might need to pick up cosplay just this once to show me,” Eddie flicks a piece of hair out of his eyes, licking his lips. He grabs his glass of punch, taking a long, satisfying drink. 

Eddie watches as Buck brings the joint up to his lips, wrapping them around the end of it. He holds it between his teeth, flicking the lighter until it burns the surrounding paper. He closes his lips around the filter, sucking in with his cheeks as the cherry starts to burn a bright red. Buck pulls it away from his face, opening his mouth, then breathing in through his nose to French inhale, the smoke creating the illusion of an upside-down waterfall. 

Eddie’s mouth waters, his eyes never leaving Buck’s face. His eyes follow from Buck’s down to his mouth, crossing his legs subconsciously when his thighs start to tingle. Eddie definitely sees it now, what Buck was trying to portray earlier. With Buck’s curls wild and falling over his forehead, his black t-shirt hugging his biceps and chest so beautifully. His skin glowing in the bright afternoon sun, almost like porcelain. He looks so fucking hot like this that it causes Eddie’s head to start spinning in circles. 

“Have you ever shotgunned before?” Buck's voice comes out raspy, blowing the smoke out in Eddie’s face. Eddie would usually find that disrespectful, but right now, his face turns red, burning his skin. 

“N-no,” Eddie shakes his head, closing his eyes for a quick moment as he breathes in the smoke Buck just exhaled. When he opens them to look at Buck, he’s already staring, a smug smile dancing over his lips. 

“You’ve never shotgunned with somebody before?” Buck leans forward, flicking ash off the joint. 

“Have you?” Eddie starts to feel a little defensive, like he’s in trouble or something. It’s not that unbelievable that Eddie’s never partaken in this activity, is it?

“I was in a frat house during college, of course I have.” Buck is looking at Eddie like that was the most obvious answer in the world. 

Eddie presses his lips together, rolling them between his teeth before he responds. 

“Who would I have even done it with? In case you haven’t noticed, none of my ex’s smoked. And you know I don't just bring anybody around the house due to Christopher.”

“Okay, okay fair. You do have a point,” Buck licks his lips, his eyes locking on Eddie. “Well, you’re about to lose your shot gunning virginity today.” 

Eddie chokes on air, his eyes wide and blown as they stare at Buck. Fear seeps into his skin, soaking into his bloodstream. Buck wants Eddie to get in his face, almost close enough to kiss, so they can shotgun? 

“No we don’t–,” Eddie’s words are cut off by a squeal, his chair being dragged closer to Buck. His breath gets stuck in his throat, Buck’s biceps bulging with the strength he’s using to pull Eddie closer. 

“C’mon, Eddie. It’ll be fun,” Buck’s words are deep, seductive. Adrenaline replaces the fear, burning through Eddie. 

Silence surrounds them, unanswered questions and thoughts floating in the atmosphere around them. Their eye contact is intense, causing goosebumps to bloom over Eddie’s skin. A few moments pass, Eddie just staring, questioning, wondering. 

“Okay– if you say so,” Eddie nods, his hands trembling in his lap. His eyes drop to Buck's hands, roaming over the burning paper between his fingers. 

“Perfect,” Buck smiles sweetly, deepening into a sinister smirk. 

Eddie’s insides turn upside down, his chest tightening before it bursts into butterflies. His vision blurs, his stomach swooping and curling in on itself. 

“Do you know the basics of how this works?” Buck asks. 

Eddie rolls his eyes, letting out a soft laugh. “Just because I’ve never done it doesn’t mean I don’t know how. I'm not an idiot, Buck.” 

“I’m not so sure about that one,” Buck laughs back, flinching back when Eddie slaps his arm. 

”Here–,” Buck stands up, coming up behind Eddie before he grabs the arms of his chair, turning him so he’s facing Buck’s chair. He makes his way back to his own chair, turning it so it’s facing Eddie. He takes a seat, scooting in so their legs are woven together. 

Eddie’s knee is pressed firmly against Buck’s groin, the heat radiating from his thighs making Eddie dizzy. His eyes trail up Buck’s body slowly, forcing himself to take in slow, deep breaths to maintain himself. 

“There we go,” a smile lights up Buck’s face. He brings the joint up to his mouth, taking a deep drag before he puts it in the ashtray on the table. He turns back towards Eddie, leaning in. 

Eddie takes a deep breath, spreading his hands out over Buck’s knees. He leans in to mirror Buck, their faces inches apart. Buck's eyes drop to Eddie’s lips, lifting his hand to hook a finger under Eddie’s chin, tilting his head up just slightly so they’re even closer. 

Buck thumbs at Eddie’s bottom lip, his jaw dropping with ease. He fights the urge to stick his tongue out, lapping it around Buck’s thumb until it sinks into the warmness of his mouth. 

Buck's hand cups Eddie’s jaw, his fingers rubbing small, soft circles against his skin. Eddie’s heart races, heat prickling at his skin like needles where their bodies connect.  

Buck opens his mouth before he starts to exhale, the cold blow of breath sending a shiver down Eddie’s body. Their lips brush against each other, shocks of electricity making Eddie feel like he’s on top of the world. His body is buzzing like he’s drunk, fighting the urge to close the distance between them. He inhales the smoke that Buck lets out, closing his eyes as they roll to the back of his head. 

Arousal courses through Eddie’s veins, his hand flying up to Buck’s wrist, wrapping his fingers around it in a soft grasp. He leans in closer, chasing the last of the smoke that floats from Buck’s mouth. 

Neither of them moves, frozen in place. The line that’s started to blur between them over the last few months has completely vanished, turning into a will-they-won't-they. Eddie feels like he’s unconscious, like this has to be some sort of dream. He doesn’t know how long they stay there in this moment, afraid to break it.

Buck is the first to pull away, leaning back in his chair with a satisfied smirk on his lips. Eddie opens his eyes at the loss of Buck’s warmth, taking in a deep breath. He grabs the joint from the ashtray, leaning back in his own chair. He brings it up to his lips, taking a deep hit. His head falls back, blowing the smoke out above him. 

The adrenaline running through Eddie's body causes his legs and hands to tremble, his breath shaking as he exhales. Every time he closes his eyes, he sees Buck right in front of him, his lips begging to be pressed against his own. They looked so beautiful, pink and plump, so inviting and welcoming for Eddie. 

“So, did it live up to everything you ever imagined?” Buck's voice breaks through Eddie’s thoughts, going straight to his core. 

Eddie is quiet for a few beats before he responds. “Oh, for sure. Exceeded my imagination, really.”

Buck sits up, grabbing his phone before he falls back into his chair. Eddie watches, his hand touching softly at his jaw where Buck just was, tracing soft circles into his skin. Heat rushes to his face, spreading across his cheeks and down his neck. His head is spinning, his vision mirroring as his eyes travel up and down Buck’s body. They stop at his thighs, Eddie’s mouth watering with desire. Eddie’s fingertips graze down his neck, tracing the column of his throat until they spread out over his chest. 

Eddie gets yanked out of his high, sexual thoughts by Buck’s deep, maple-like voice. “I’m thinking we should do a regular ‘just chatting’ live. In a way for us to get used to how it works and for them to get to know us more. What do you think?” 

“I think that it makes sense. It seems like a good idea for a first live, yeah.” Eddie nods, pulling himself up into a sitting position. He shoves everything he can grab back into Buck’s travel weed bag. 

“What are you thinking about for lunch?” Eddie asks, standing up from his chair. He watches as Buck does the same, tapping on his phone a few times before he looks up. 

“In-N-Out? Animal style burger and fries?” 

Eddie smiles, licking his lips as his mouth starts to salivate. “Sounds great. I’ll order and you set everything set up for the live. Meet you in the kitchen.” Eddie pats his pockets, making sure he has his phone before he grabs the bag of weed and his glass of punch, making his way into the house. He drops the bag off in his room, closing the door behind him when he leaves. 

When he enters the kitchen, Buck has his phone set up on the counter, the screen lit up with the live page pulled up. He pulls his own phone from his pocket, placing his glass on the counter. He opens the In-N-Out app, ordering them both food. 

“Food is ordered.” Eddie puts his phone down, putting an elbow on the counter, holding his head up in his hand. He tilts his head to look at Buck. 

“Alright, cool. Are you okay if I start the live now?” When Eddie sends Buck a soft nod, Buck leans forward, pressing the big red ‘live’ button at the bottom of his screen. They both wait a few moments, watching as the number of viewers starts to roll in. 

They both send an awkward smile toward the camera, looking at each other before they start to laugh. Eddie covers his mouth with his hand, his eyes squinting from how big a smile is taking over his face. He drops his head forward, his shoulders shaking as he tries to hold in his laughter. 

“Hi everybody,” Buck pauses, soft giggles rumbling from the back of his throat before he continues. “We thought we’d give this live thing a try. Now, a few rules. Be respectful to us and others, and be patient. Neither of us know what we’re doing when it comes to this,” another deep chuckle sounds in the air around them. 

Eddie lifts his head, his eyes half lidded and red from their activities earlier. His body feels weightless, and his mind is starting to quiet down. He waves toward the camera, a goofy smile flashing at the audience. 

“Hi, welcome,” Eddie giggles at himself, his eyes scanning over the chat, trying to focus, but his vision keeps blurring out from how fast it's moving. 

“What strain did you guys just smoke?” Buck says softly, squinting as he leans closer to his phone. He turns towards Eddie, raising an eyebrow. 

“Why are you asking me? It’s your flower.” Eddie pulls his cup of punch over to himself, wrapping his lips around the straw to take a quick drink. 

“It’s our flower, first of all. And I didn’t even ask you or say anything. Calm down, princess.” 

Eddie freezes mid-sip, choking on the liquid going down his throat. He covers his mouth with his arm, turning around to cough into it. His face prickles in heat, his stomach and chest feeling like a cage of butterflies exploded inside of him. 

“Woah– are you good?” Buck puts a hand on Eddie’s shoulder, rubbing soft circles against his back. The weight on Eddie’s shoulder burns a hole through his shirt. 

“Yeah– wrong pipe that's all. I’m okay,” Eddie nods, wiping his mouth as he turns around. “Anyways, since Buck over here doesn’t seem to remember what strain we just smoked,” he shoots a side eye towards Buck, a fond smile sliding onto his face as Buck nudges an elbow into his side. “Mango kush. I taught Buck how to roll his first joint. Talk about being a rookie or something.” 

Buck doesn’t move away, his body radiating a suffocating heat over Eddie’s side. They’re almost pressed flush against each other, like there isn’t an entire kitchen they could be using. 

“Alright, man, that’s fucked up. You have to admit they’re tricky to roll.” Buck takes a step back, turning around to grab a glass from the cabinet. When he turns back around, he puts a hand on Eddie’s waist when he walks by, goosebumps and heat spreading across Eddie’s skin like a wildfire. 

“To you.” The words roll off Eddie’s tongue like autopilot, not being able to think before he speaks right now. 

“Fucking brat,” Buck chuckles, opening the fridge to grab himself some punch. 

“Oh yeah? I bet you won’t do something about it.” Eddie covers his mouth with his hand, his eyes wide as he stares at the chat. It moves even faster, everybody spamming something about buddie. He rubs his mouth, trying to play it off before he drops his hand on the counter. 

“You’d like that, wouldn’t you?” Buck responds. Eddie hears the fridge close, the creaks in the floorboards growing louder as Buck gets closer. His head is spinning. He can’t think, his heart threatening to beat out of his chest. He can feel the tips of his ears grow hot, burning uncomfortably. 

“Pfft–,” Eddie huffs out a laugh, shaking his head. “That– I don’t even– okay, well that was a crazy thing to say,” Eddie refuses to look up, trying his best to hide his face away from the camera. He knows he’s burning a bright, embarrassing red, and he would never live it down with the fans. 

Eddie lifts his head when he hears the doorbell ring, his stomach growling. He stands up to turn around, colliding right into Buck’s hard chest. His hands fly up to protect his face, smacking right against Buck’s pecs. Buck’s hands fly up to Eddie’s waist, holding him in place so he doesn’t fall. 

Their faces are inches apart, breathing each other's air. Eddie’s eyes drop to Buck’s lips, licking his own. He holds his breath, afraid of taking up too much of Buck’s air, wanting to save it all for him. His heart drops to his stomach, nausea taking over his abdomen from nerves. His eyes trail back up to Buck’s eyes, who is staring back at him brightly. 

Eddie feels like maybe he died and has gone to heaven. His body pulls itself closer to Buck, like he’s trying to crawl into his skin, to become one. Buck’s fingers dig into Eddie’s back, holding him impossibly closer. 

Eddie can’t figure out if he’s feeling a moment or making something up out of nothing. He lets out a shallow breath, his heart beating loudly in his ears. 

Buck’s eyes bounce between Eddie’s, his breath fanning over his cheek. They drop down to Eddie’s lips, staring for a few moments before they lift back up. They hold eye contact, fire burning behind Buck’s now dark ocean blue eyes. 

Eddie licks his lips again, his mouth falling open slightly. He stays there, frozen in place as he waits to see if Buck will lean in. To confirm this is real and not something his brain is making up. 

He feels Buck shift, his face leaning in closer, just barely. Like he’s asking Eddie, telling him to close the rest of the distance. He’s given his permission, and now he’s waiting for Eddie to finish what he’s started. 

Eddie leans forward, taking the leap that Buck is asking him to. The world feels like it’s stopped around him, waiting for him to finally choose joy and be happy. 

This made-up imagination about Buck wanting Eddie back shatters when Buck pulls his hands from Eddie’s waist, planting them against his chest. He pushes himself away, creating a cold distance between them. The cold air swooshes in around Eddie’s body, freezing him over like stone. Rejection bubbles in his chest, threatening to spill out from his mouth. His throat closes up, his eyes prickling with tears. 

Buck pulls himself out of Eddie’s grasp, his hands falling to his sides. Eddie steps back, watching as Buck grabs his phone, turning the live off before he tosses it back on the counter. He turns back to face Eddie again, his eyes dark and blown with desire. 

One of Buck’s hands flies up to Eddie’s waist, pulling him flush against his chest. His other hand cups Eddie’s jaw, pulling him in, smashing their lips together. Eddie gasps, his eyes instantly falling closed, his arms wrapping around Buck any way that he can. He feels like Buck has lit a fire underneath them, holding them in place like stone to burn alive. 

His brain feels like it’s melting out of his head, relaxing in Buck’s hold, kissing him back just as hard. Buck licks Eddie’s bottom lip, sucking it into his mouth after. Eddie moans softly, it being swallowed easily by Buck. 

Buck backs Eddie against the counter, dropping both hands to wrap around his thighs, lifting him onto the cold surface without breaking the kiss. Eddie lets out a squeal, his eyes widening. Buck takes this time to shove his tongue in Eddie’s mouth, lapping and licking every inch of surface that he can. Their tongues fight for dominance. Eddie backs down when Buck sucks on his tongue, moaning around it. Heat rushes through his body, his thighs tingling where Buck’s hands lie.

Buck is the first to pull away, leaning his forehead against Eddie’s, panting against his lips. Eddie mirrors Buck, trying to catch his breath. They stay still, just staring at each other, neither making another move. 

Eddie is the first to break the silence. “How long have–,” 

“I wanted to do that? The first day we met. How long have you?” 

Butterflies swarm Eddie’s body, his hand lifting up to his lips, feeling where they’re still wet from Buck’s spit. 

“At least a couple of months. The very first video you recorded here to be exact.” Eddie’s staring at Buck’s lips, biting his bottom one. He fights an internal battle with himself, trying to hold himself back from just attacking Buck in a nasty make-out. He loses the battle, but compromises with himself, leaving countless pecks against Buck’s lips. 

Buck giggles, kissing him back the same way. “So you’re–,” another kiss, “– telling me we could have–,” kiss, “–been kissing this whole time?” 

“Well,” Eddie pulls back, wrapping his legs around Buck’s waist. “I didn’t– I didn’t want to lose you. To ruin something so beautiful, on the off chance you didn’t feel the same. I never knew I could be in love with somebody like this, and I didn’t want to lose it, even if we only ever stayed friends.” 

Buck pulls away, his eyes dropping wide, his mouth falling open. His eyes dart around Eddie’s face, his pupils dilating, only a sliver of blue shining through. Eddie’s face drops, his heart sinking to his stomach when he processes what he just said. 

“I didn’t–.” 

“You’re in love with me?” Buck's voice is quiet, cracking around the e. His hands pull at Eddie’s thighs, rubbing soft circles into the covered flesh. 

“Y-yeah. I am,” Eddie nods, his voice dipping down to a whisper. His eyes drop, taking a deep breath. Of course, he just ruined this; he just had to blab his mouth and confess his feelings for Buck. 

“S-since when?” Buck hooks a finger under Eddie’s chin, making him look up at him. 

“Honestly, I just realized all this at the same time. But I think– I think I actually fell in love with you when you introduced me to Carla.” 

Buck is silent for a few beats, his eyes continuing to bounce between Eddie’s and his lips. He can’t figure out the look on Buck’s face; it’s one he’s never really seen before. It could be shock, but Eddie can’t seem to determine if it’s a good or bad shock. 

“Since I introduced you to Carla… seven years ago…” more silence floats in the atmosphere around them. “You’ve– been in love with me for– for seven years?” 

“Buck you’re kind of freaking me out. I can’t read you right now. I can’t figure out if your reaction is good or bad, or if you even feel the same way.” 

Buck's face breaks out in a smile, a huffed laugh leaving his mouth. He grabs Eddie by the back of his neck, pulling him into a soft, slow kiss. Their lips move over each other slowly, just taking in the way it feels to finally be against each other. Eddie imagined how it would feel to kiss Buck for months now, but his imagination never did the reality of it any justice. Buck's lips are so soft, welcoming for him. They mold perfectly against his, like this is where they were meant to be, kissing Eddie for the rest of their lives. 

Eddie’s hands roam over Buck’s body, squeezing at his back up to his shoulders. He brushes them up to the nap of Buck’s neck, lacing his fingers in his hair. He pulls softly, massaging Buck’s scalp with the pads of his fingers. His actions earn him a moan that he swallows eagerly. 

Buck pulls away, kissing down Eddie’s jaw, following the column of his throat. His facial hair tickles Eddie’s skin, goosebumps following the feathering kisses. 

“I introduced you to Carla to help take care of your son after knowing you for like a week. I almost died fighting to find your son during the tsunami, Eddie. I tried to dig you out myself with my own bare hands when the well collapsed on you. I don’t know what else I have to do to show you how fucking madly and stupidly in love with you I am. If I could never breathe again to save more air for you, I would. If I could take away all of your pain and give it to myself, I would. I would walk through fire and hell for you, Eddie. Loving you is so easy and natural it’s like the air that I breathe. Do you understand that?”

Warmth and electricity buzz through Eddie’s veins, his hands tracing down Buck’s neck and around his shoulders. They slide over his pecs, pushing him back so that Eddie can see him. Their eyes hold them in place, writing them in the history of this house. 

“You–,” Eddie laughs, pulling Buck in for a deep, sensual kiss. His hands fist Buck’s shirt, pulling at the soft material. Buck’s hands trail up Eddie’s thighs to hold his hips, his thumbs fighting to get under Eddie’s shirt, their skin connecting with heat. 

Eddie bites Buck’s lip, licking it afterwards. His hands bunch up Buck’s shirt, sliding under it to spread his fingers out across Buck’s fiery skin. The heat burns through him, branding him as Buck’s. 

“Eddie–,” Buck pulls back, Eddie taking his bottom lip between his teeth. He sucks on it, letting it go with a loud pop. “You– if you don’t stop this is going to turn into something entirely different. Buck 1.0 will make an appearance and I don’t know if you want to see that.” 

“Oh,” Eddie smirks, his hands sliding across Buck's chest, cupping his pecs in his palms. “I’ve been dreaming about seeing the Buck 1.0 you brag about since the moment you first told me about him,” Eddie says lowly, his lips brushing over the shell of Buc’s ear. He sucks on Buck’s earlobe, kissing right below his ear. 

Eddie’s lips feather over Buck’s neck, kissing to his pulse point. He sticks his tongue out, licking the hot skin before he wraps his lips around it. He sucks softly, nibbling at the puckered skin. 

“Mmm, yeah? Is that so?” Buck’s throat vibrates under Eddie’s mouth, his eyes rolling to the back of his head. 

“Yeah,” Eddie pulls back a few inches, blowing on the reddening skin. He sits back up straight, his eyes meeting Buck’s. “Unless, y’know, he never existed and you were just making him up.” 

Buck pulls Eddie off the counter, turning him around before he shoves Eddie down. Buck holds Eddie’s waist, pressing his hardening dick against his ass. He bends over Eddie, his breath fanning over his neck. 

“Just remember that I love you, because I’m about to fuck you like I don’t.” 

Eddie’s stomach curls in on itself, his dick filling up. His mouth falls open as his face gets shoved against the counter under him. The coldness burns against Eddie’s sweating, hot skin. A gasped moan falls from his lips, shoving his ass back against Buck. 

He feels himself being pulled up by his shoulder, his back colliding with Buck’s chest. He’s breathless, panting out. His head spins as it rolls back against Buck’s shoulder. 

“Want to smoke some more?” Buck kisses over Eddie’s neck, sucking purple bruises over the sensitive skin. 

“R-right now?” Eddie whines, fucking whines. 

“No, while I’m balls deep fucking you into the mattress.” Buck’s words consume Eddie, feeling limp in his grasp. He nods, biting his lip as a moan sounds in the kitchen around them.  

“Have you ever had sex while high, Eddie?” Buck's voice is deep, shaking arousal through Eddie's bones. He shakes his head, gasping loudly when Buck pinches a nipple between his index finger and his thumb. 

“Use your words, baby.” Buck whispers against Eddie’s ear, licking the tip of his cartilage. Eddie shivers, his insides swimming around in a puddle of goop. 

“No–,” Eddie pauses, his eyes falling closed. “No, I’ve never had sex while high.” 

Buck's hands trail down Eddie’s stomach, his touch light, goosebumps following every graze. They drop below Eddie’s waist, massaging his thighs. 

“Mmm,” Buck kisses down Eddie’s ear to where it connects with his head. Eddie’s skin is so hot he doesn’t even feel Buck's tongue against him when he licks a fat strip. He blows cold air on the skin, a shuddered breath falling from Eddie. “Have you ever gotten yourself off while high?”

Eddie nods again, his hands lifting to wrap around Buck's neck behind him. He laces his hands in the soft curls, tugging softly. Buck squeezes Eddie’s thighs, giving them a soft slap, which earns him a quiet cry. 

“What did I just say about using your words? I know you can do it.”

“I-I’m sorry,” Eddie nods, licking his lips. “Yes, I have.” Eddie’s words come out as a soft whimper, breathing heavy. 

“That’s a good girl. See I knew you could do it,” Buck pulls back, turning Eddie around so they’re face to face. “Go to your room, get a preroll out and strip. Lay on the bed and wait for me, I’ll be right in, okay?” 

Eddie nods, his face burning a bright red. He takes a step back, turning around to make his way to his room. He stumbles over his feet a few times from his legs wobbling like jell-o.

He shoves his way through the door, yanking his shirt off before throwing it across the room. He unbuttons his pants while he walks to his nightstand, rummaging through the bag of weed, pulling out a preroll. He brings it up to his nose, smelling the sweetness of cotton candy. His mouth waters as the smell takes over his senses, setting it down on the nightstand with a lighter. 

Eddie shoves his pants down, his hands shaking when he pulls them off his ankles. He takes a deep, shaky breath, crawling his way up the bed. He sits up against the wall, his legs crossed, with his hands covering his hard dick. Shame and embarrassment run over him, plowing through him like a semi-truck. 

He gets pulled out of his insecure thoughts by Buck walking into the room, pulling all of Eddie’s attention to him. Rays of sunshine blare from his skin, lighting up the room when he walks in. His face is flushed a deep red, his birthmark almost purple. His lips are swollen and red, Eddie’s teeth marks intending the flesh, claiming them as his own. Buck’s once sly blue eyes have darkened to the northern sea. 

“So obedient,” Buck smiles, his face soft and warm. Satisfaction floods Eddie’s body, relaxing into the mattress. 

Buck grabs his shirt by the back of his neck, yanking it over his head. He tosses it to the side, unbuttoning his jeans while he walks to the nightstand. He picks up the joint, bringing it up to his nose before he takes a deep breath. His eyes fall closed, his head rolling to the side. He licks his lips, opening his eyes as he turns his head to look at Eddie. 

“You’re going to love this one, baby.” Buck puts the preroll behind his ear, shoving his pants down his legs. He kicks them off, climbing into the bed next to Eddie. The pet name makes Eddie’s heart flutter, a huge smile taking over his face subconsciously. 

Buck crawls to the end of the bed, sitting on his knees. Eddie watches as Buck’s eyes scan over his body. Every curve, scar, and muscle. Buck places his hands on Eddie’s knees, the contact sending waves of electricity through his body. 

“You’re so beautiful,” Eddie whispers, his eyes memorizing every detail he can on Buck’s body. He feels like he can’t look away, like Buck is a magnet keeping him in place. Buck looks like a Greek god, so sculpted, fit, and just stunning. 

Eddie leans forward, his hands sliding over Buck’s waist. His fingers dust over the sensitive skin, goosebumps following the tips of his fingers. He watches the way Buck’s stomach twitches with every new touch. His hands trace over the lines of Buck's sides, around his pecs, down the center of his stomach. He pauses at the soft flesh, his mouth watering. 

“So fucking beautiful, Buck.” Eddie looks up, and Buck is already staring at him. His eyes are big and round, softness overtaking them. 

A giggle bubbles from Buck’s chest, his smile taking up half his face. His eyes squint shut, crinkling in the corners. He looks down, his face flushing darker. 

“You’re not too bad yourself,” Buck opens Eddie’s legs, his hands mapping up his thighs to his waist. He grabs, pulling Eddie down so he’s lying on his back. 

Eddie lets out a yelp, grabbing Buck's wrists. He stares up, his breathing deep. 

“That was rude, by the way,” Eddie rolls his eyes, shaking his head. 

“I’m just messing.” Buck grabs Eddie’s jaw, forcing him to look at him. Buck’s grip is rough, and Eddie is not able to move. “You are the most beautiful person I have ever met,” Buck whispers, leaning forward, feathering his lips over Eddie’s. “But if you ever roll your eyes at me like that again, there will be consequences.” 

Excitement boils through Eddie’s blood, pumping over his body. He smirks, biting his lip.

“Oh yeah? Like what?” Eddie whispers back, sticking his tongue out to lick over Buck’s hand. 

Buck moves his hand, shoving two fingers in Eddie’s mouth to shut him up. Eddie closes his lips around the digits, wrapping his tongue around them as he sucks. His eyes never drop from Buck’s, darkness staring back at him with amusement written over his face. 

“I see,” Buck nods, lifting himself up on his knees. He pulls his fingers from Eddie’s mouth, smearing the spit on his chin and down his neck. 

Buck straddles Eddie’s chest, his dick hanging in his face. Eddie stares at the red, angry head, his mouth watering at the precum beading at the tip. He fights the urge to lean forward and take it in his mouth, sucking and licking it clean, polishing it with his spit. 

“You like things in your mouth, huh? Is that how I’ll get you to shut the fuck up?” Buck tilts his head, wrapping a hand around the base of his dick. He slides the tip over Eddie’s lips, slapping it against the red, bitten flesh. 

Eddie’s eyes roll to the back of his head, his hands wrapping around Buck's thighs, squeezing tightly. His nails dig into the flexed muscle, half crescent moons marking where he was. He nods quickly, his eyes snapping back open to stare up at Buck through his eyelashes. 

“Mhm,” Eddie’s mouth falls open slightly, the tip of Buck’s dick slipping past them. It hits the front of his teeth, begging to be let in. 

“Look at you, already so eager to get me inside of you,” Buck pauses, his free hand cupping Eddie’s jaw, his thumb brushing over his bottom lip, spreading the precum over it. “You look so pretty baby, like you’re wearing lipgloss.”

Eddie whines, arching his back as his nails claw over Buck’s thighs. Red, puffy marks map out over the skin, burning under Eddie’s hands. 

“Buck– please,” Eddie begs, his eyes big and round as they stare back up at him. His heart pounds in his chest, the weight of Buck sitting on his chest turning him on immensely. His own dick sits painfully hard between his legs, precum dripping down his thigh and soaking into the sheets. 

“Since you asked so nicely,” Buck's voice drops a few octaves, raspiness wrapping around his words. 

Buck dips his thumb into Eddie’s mouth, forcing it open. It falls with ease, his tongue darting out to lick Buck’s thumb. Buck guides his dick into Eddie’s mouth, the girth stretching his lips painfully. 

Eddie moans pathetically, melting around the heavy weight against his tongue. He breathes deeply through his nose, swallowing down the extra saliva his mouth is creating. Buck’s groin nuzzles snuggly against Eddie’s mouth, his dick going down his throat. Eddie gags softly, his eyes burning with tears. He tries to control his breathing, swallowing around Buck’s thickness. 

“You still like having your mouth full Eddie?” An evil glint shines in Buck’s eyes, sending an intriguing shiver through Eddie’s bones. 

Eddie nods as best as he can, his tongue licking the underside of the cock in his mouth. He’s dreamed about this for months, and it’s everything he’s ever imagined. If he could just stay like this forever, choking on a fat dick, he’d be completely okay and content with that. 

“God, look at you Eddie, drooling all over the place. Making such a mess of yourself,” Buck's thumb swipes down Eddie's chin, bringing it up to his own mouth before he sucks on it. He pulls it out with a loud pop, licking his lips. “You taste so delicious. I always knew you would.” 

Eddie’s dick twitches from between his legs, aching painfully from neglect. His eyes drop closed, trying to bob his head, trying to signal for Buck to move. Of course, Buck gets the message, pulling out before sliding back in. The tip of his dick hits the back of Eddie’s throat with every thrust, gagging around him. 

Buck picks up his pace, thrusting harder into Eddie’s tight, wet heat. His balls slap Eddie’s chin with every thrust. Skin slapping, wet slurping, gagging, and moans fill the room. The sounds bounce off the walls, striking Eddie right in his dick. His hips buck up, begging for some sort of friction. 

“Fuck Eddie your mouth feels so good,” Buck whimpers, biting his lip hard. Small pants and cries sound around them, Eddie’s stomach erupting in heat and butterflies. 

Eddie’s hands find their way to his dick, wrapping around the base. A hand slaps it away, Buck pausing his harsh thrusts to stare down at Eddie. His pupils are blown, his face red and blushed and dark, rosy red. 

“Who said you could touch yourself?” Buck bottoms out, Eddie’s throat closing around the tip of his dick. He tries to gasp for air, his heart beating loudly in his chest. 

“Do you want me to touch you baby?” Buck pulls out, Eddie panting and gasping to get a full breath of air.

Eddie’s never felt so aroused before, his body tingling and buzzing. His mind is running in circles, a million miles a minute. The only thing he can focus on is just BuckBuckBuck. He nods quickly, his knees bending, planting his feet into the mattress. 

“Yes– fuck Buck, it hurts. Please, baby, I need–,” Eddie throws his head back when Buck lowers himself on Eddie’s chest, leaning back to wrap a hand around his dick. 

“You’re so desperate that you can’t even finish your sentence? C'mon, Eddie. I didn’t expect you to be this easy. Can you finish your train of thought? I know you can, c’mon Eddie you’ve got this, I know you can do it.” 

Jesus Christ. Eddie never thought he’d be into humiliation, getting degraded to almost feeling dumb. He knows that Buck doesn’t actually think he’s dumb, but the implication sends shocks of excitement through his veins. 

“I need you. Please I need something– anything.” Eddie begs, his vision blurring as he loses focus. 

“How could I ever say no when you ask so nicely?” Buck pets Eddie’s hair back out of his eyes, his fingers curling in the loose strands before he yanks. Eddie lets out a loud yelp, his eyes screwing shut. Pain throbs through his head, his dick twitching from between his legs. It hangs heavy against his thigh as more precum dribbles out of it. Eddie’s never been this wet before; he didn’t even know he could get this wet. 

“But, how about we get this started.” Buck picks the joint from behind his ear, putting it between his lips. He snatches the lighter from the nightstand, flicking it on before he brings it up to the end of the preroll. He lets the paper burn before he sucks in with his cheeks, the cherry glowing a bright red. He pulls it away from his lips, opening his mouth before he inhales the cloud he’s created. Buck looks down at Eddie, blowing the smoke in his face. 

Eddie’s body stills, breathing heavy as he stares up at Buck. Annoyance courses through him, opening his mouth to say something. Buck takes the joint from his mouth, putting it in Eddie’s. 

“Just one hit and then we’ll continue what we were doing. How does that sound?” Buck asks. 

Eddie doesn’t move for a few seconds before he wraps his lips around the filter, inhaling deeply. The smoke burns down Eddie’s raw throat, filling his lungs. His body instantly relaxes, his body feeling weightless. Buck pulls it away, leaning over to the nightstand to put it in an ashtray. 

When Buck turns back to Eddie, his eyes are already half lidded, his face more relaxed. 

“You still want me to help get you off baby?” Buck’s voice is deep, a devious smirk finding its way over his face.

“Yes!” Eddie rushes out, his head feeling like it’s melting into the pillow under him. 

Buck gives Eddie’s hair one last pet before he swings a leg over Eddie so he’s kneeling beside him. He moves up the bed, swinging a leg back over Eddie’s face so he’s caged in by Buck’s thighs. 

Buck puts a hand out in front of him, holding onto Eddie’s shin for support. He wraps a hand around his own dick, pressing the tip against Eddie’s lips. Eddie opens his mouth instantly, his tongue darting out to lick the salty tip. The taste melts over his tongue, savoring it for a few seconds before Buck sinks back into Eddie’s mouth. 

Eddie relaxes his throat, his eyes tearing up from the stretch and holding back a gag. He takes a deep breath in through his nose, his hands finding their way onto Buck’s thighs. He wraps them around the silky flesh, squeezing tightly. 

Buck holds himself hunched over Eddie, his head dropped forward. He moans softly, breathing heavy. Once he’s fully down Eddie’s throat, he takes a deep, shaky breath. 

Buck leans forward, wrapping a large hand around Eddie’s neglected, painfully hard dick. Eddie moans around the thickness in his mouth, his hips lifting off the bed at the contact. His body burns with desire, fire spreading through him. 

Buck drops his body down so he’s completely on top of Eddie, kitten licking his tip. Eddie’s eyes roll to the back of his head, his nails digging into Buck’s skin. He sinks down, swallowing Eddie’s cock with ease. Buck’s wet heat makes Eddie feel like he’s on another fucking planet, completely consuming him and every atom of his being. Pleasure overcomes his body, muffled moans and whimpers trying to escape his throat. 

Buck bobs his head, slurping as he does so. He lifts his hips from Eddie’s face, easing back in. Eddie can’t do anything but just sit there, to just take what Buck gives him. He lets Buck use his mouth, his hips picking up the pace whenever he starts bobbing his head on Eddie faster. 

Eddie is sinking into the mattress, his stomach twisting in knots from how close he’s getting. His eyes are closed, not being able to hold them open from pleasure and being high. The sounds filling the room are filthy, going straight to Eddie’s dick. Precum spurts out of him, coating Buck’s tongue in thick ribbons. 

Eddie’s eyes shoot open when Buck pulls off his dick, whining loudly. He pulls himself from Eddie’s mouth, climbing off of him. Eddie opens his mouth to speak, a pained whine falling from his lips instead. He makes grabby hands towards Buck, his stomach knotting and cramping from how fucking close he was. 

“I told you I was going to fuck you, didn’t I? Good girls don’t whine when they don’t get their way, baby. I don’t know, maybe I shouldn’t even continue,” Buck clicks his tongue, the loud pop shaking Eddie’s core. He shakes his head, sitting up quickly to intertwin his fingers with Buck’s. 

“No please Buck no I’m sorry.  I’m good, I can be good I can’t –,” Eddie shakes his head, pulling Buck into him, smashing their lips together. 

Buck grabs Eddie’s chin, his grip harsh as he shoves his tongue in Eddie’s mouth. The saltiness of his own cum on Buck’s mouth causes more precum to spurt out of him. He grabs the back of Buck’s head, pulling him back on top of him. Buck falls with ease, landing between Eddie’s wide-open legs. Their bare cocks knock together, moaning into each other's mouths. 

Buck bites Eddie’s lip as he pulls away, slapping back into place when he lets go. He stretches his arm over to the nightstand, swinging a drawer open to rummage through it. 

“Okay where the fuck is your lube. I know it’s– ah got it,” Buck shoves the drawer closed, cracking the lid open. He pours some on his fingers, rubbing them together to warm it up. 

Eddie stares, panting heavily. Buck makes him feel breathless, like he can’t get a full breath of air. He’s never been so turned on and in love before in his life; he never knew it could feel like this. 

Eddie reaches up to grab Buck again, trying to reconnect their lips. Buck’s clean hand flies up to his throat to shove him away, pinning him to the pillow. Buck tilts his head before he speaks up. 

“Why do you think you can just take and do whatever you want, Eddie? Did nobody teach you manners?” Buck shakes his head, tisking. His fingers tighten around Eddie’s neck, digging into his pulse point. 

Eddie’s heart starts to pick up, beating against his rib cage. He wraps a hand around Buck’s wrist, but not to pull him away, to keep him there. His eyes roll to the back of his head again, his back arching off the bed. Eddie’s mouth falls open, pathetic sounds falling from it. 

“You would like this. I never expected you to be such a slut.” Buck's voice drops in a way Eddie’s never heard, his words holding such an authority behind them that it makes Eddie tremble with need and want. 

Buck drops his lube-covered hand between Eddie’s thighs, circling his fingers over his rim. Eddie gaps loudly, his eyes shooting open. His legs widen even more, his brain feeling like mush. Buck releases his hand on Eddie’s neck, replacing it with his lips. He feathers kisses up Eddie’s throat, around his jaw, and up to his lips. The kiss is slow, like Buck is trying to memorize the shape and taste of Eddie’s mouth. 

Eddie wraps his arms around Buck’s neck, lacing his hands in the soft curls. He feels pressure at his hole, Buck easing a finger in. The feeling is uncomfortable, his hips shifting on the mattress. With every twitch and shuffle around, Buck deepens the kiss, his tongue swiping over Eddie’s bottom lip. When Eddie opens his mouth to give Buck access, he feels the finger start to move, pumping slowly inside of him. 

Buck breaks the kiss, his lips still smushed against Eddie’s as he speaks. “You’re so fucking tight, Eds. You’re gonna feel so good wrapped around me,” Buck says darkly, biting Eddie’s bottom lip harshly. Eddie winces in pain, his dick pulsing between his legs.

Eddie keens, following Buck when he starts to pull back with Eddie’s lip still between his teeth. He feels Buck slide in a second finger, sinking them into him until he’s knuckle deep. Eddie whines painfully, digging his nails anywhere that he can. 

Buck scissors his fingers open, fucking them into Eddie faster. The slickness of his fingers fills the room, bouncing off the walls right back over Eddie’s ears. The feeling of pleasure and the sounds filling the room make him feel like he’s drowning, the high buzz making his vision spin every time he closes his eyes. 

Buck lets Eddie’s lip go, shuffling down the bed some. His lips hover over Eddie’s chest, his hot breath fanning over his nipple. Goosebumps break out over Eddie’s skin, his hands fisting the sheets under him. Buck darts his tongue out, flicking Eddie’s nipple with it. He laps it around the puckering nub, taking it into his mouth before sucking on it. 

“Oh– oh my god,” Eddie moans out, yanking on the sheets under him. Buck flicks his tongue as he sucks, adding a third finger to Eddie’s tight heat. 

The pleasure is one of the most overwhelming things Eddie’s ever felt. He rocks his hips down against Buck’s fingers, trying to get him to fuck into him deeper. The new angle causes one of his fingers to brush over the bundle of nerves, Eddie’s body spasming. The mix of pleasure and Buck whispering soft praises against his skin feels like a wildfire has broken out over his body, spreading through him like gasoline poured over him. 

“Buck– fuck me now. Please I’m– I need you so bad please baby I need you to fill me up,” Eddie begs, not even being able to comprehend what he’s saying.

Buck pulls off Eddie’s nipple with a loud pop, a string of spit connecting them. He shuffles around the bed, settling between Eddie’s legs. Buck’s hands slide over them, pinning his knees to the mattress, spreading him out, and exposing him the most that he can. 

“You just want my cock so bad, huh? Want to be filled to the brim until you can’t even speak, don’t you?” Buck picks up the bottle of lube, pouring a layer over himself. 

Eddie nods, lifting his hips off the bed, his hole clenching around the emptiness. His head is spinning; the only thing that he can focus on is being Buck. He feels like he’s being consumed by him with every passing second, like this is exactly where he was always meant to be. It’s all he can see, smell, feel, hear, and taste. 

“Yes, I need it so bad,” Eddie nods again. His mouth is watering at the simple thought of Buck’s cock being buried inside of him. “Want to feel you for days, please,” Eddie begs, his voice coming out high-pitched and strained. His throat feels raw from Buck fucking it earlier, still burning a little from the smoke. 

“Look at you, learning how to be polite,” a goofy smile sneaks over Buck’s face. He wraps a hand around his cock, lining it up with Eddie’s hole before he sinks in past the tight ring of muscles. 

Eddie’s eyes screw shut as Buck continues to sink into him, the stretch feeling like he’s being burned from the inside out. He gasps for air, his hands shaking as they roam around Buck’s body, trying to ground himself.  

“Are you okay?” Buck pauses halfway, his eyes big and bright as they stare at Eddie. 

“You’re– fuck. You’re so big, I can’t– I don’t think you’ll fit.” 

“You think my dick is too big for you? You don’t think you can take me?” Buck laughs, grabbing the lube again. He pops the cap open, dribbling some all over Eddie’s dick, it leaking down between his cheeks to where they’re connected. 

Buck bottoms out slowly, his groin flush against Eddie’s ass cheeks. He doesn’t move, letting Eddie get used to the new stretch. He kisses around Eddie’s body, whispering soft praises between every kiss. 

Eddie has never felt so full before, like his body is begging for more. His hole flutters around the thickness inside of it, trying to get used to it. He gives Buck a soft nod, kissing his head of curls. 

“Move– please.” 

Buck pulls out before easing back in, taking things slow. Despite his words from earlier, him taking it slow and giving Eddie the time and space to get used to it first is sending warmth throughout his chest. He never thought Buck would hurt him, but the confirmation that he actually cares and loves Eddie makes him feel like he’s on top of the world. 

Buck picks up his pace, holding Eddie’s hips down on the mattress as he starts to slam into him. Eddie melts against Buck, loud uh uh uh’s filling the room around them.

“You’re taking me so fucking good, Eddie. This pretty little ass was made for me.” Buck's skin glistens with sweat, sliding over Eddie’s with every touch. 

“All yours, Buck,” Eddie whimpers. “Fuck me harder,“ he cries, his nails dragging down Buck’s back. “Fuck yes! Just like that, yes, you feel so good,” Eddie shouts, arching his back when Buck starts to fuck into him harder. The force of Buck’s thrusts jolts Eddie up the bed, the frame slamming into the wall. 

Buck grabs Eddie’s chin, forcing his mouth open with his fingers. He leans down, puckering his lips before he spits in Eddie’s mouth. Eddie closes his mouth around it, swallowing it with thirst and desperation. He keens loudly, opening his mouth again, sticking his tongue out. 

“You’re such a dirty slut, aren’t you? Just take anything I fucking give you like a happy little puppy,” Buck growls out, his words shooting Eddie right in the gut, his stomach knotting and boiling over. 

Buck closes the distance between them, taking Eddie’s tongue in his mouth, sucking it dry. Eddie’s dick pulses between them, the movements of Buck’s thrusts creating just enough friction for pleasure to course through him. 

When Buck pulls back, a string of spit connects their mouths, breaking and landing on Eddie’s chin. His tongue darts out of his mouth to lick it up, swiping his chin clean. Buck puckers his lips again, but instead of spitting in Eddie’s mouth, he lets it drool out in a long drip. The saliva is slimy when it hits Eddie’s tongue, coating his DNA with Buck’s. 

“Go ahead and swallow. You’re always so eager for anything of mine. You’re just a pathetic little whore, Eddie. Now take it like such a good girl.” 

Eddie does exactly what Buck asks, swallowing down the thick spit in his mouth. He’s growing closer with every thrust, the force of them blinding. When Buck hits Eddie’s bundle of nerves, his vision blacks out, his hands lifting to his own hair to yank on it. He circles his hips down, meeting Buck halfway. 

Buck doesn’t slow his thrusts down as he leans over to the nightstand, picking up the half-burned joint. He sits up on his knees, his angle changing as he does so. His rhythm is deep and hard, his dick creating a bulge at the bottom of Eddie’s stomach. 

“God baby, my dick is so big it’s poking out of your stomach,” Buck grabs one of Eddie’s hands, placing it on the bulge. Eddie’s mouth falls open, his eyes burning with tears from the pleasure. He can’t even form words, loud moans and whimpers taking their place. 

His eyes fall shut again, his hands twitching and shaking as they trail over his chest, taking a nipple between his fingers. Needles pierce his skin, trembling under the weight of Buck’s body. 

His eyes shoot open when he feels something round touch his lip, looking down to see Buck holding the joint up to his mouth. 

“C’mon Eddie, you can do it. Go ahead and take a hit for me,” Buck’s words are humiliating, degrading Eddie into the mattress under him. He wraps his lips around it, taking a large hit. When he lets it go, Buck lays it back down in the ashtray. 

Buck pulls Eddie’s hands away from his nipples, shaking his head, his curls falling over his eyes. “You were doing so good and you just had to go and ruin it, didn’t you?” Buck pauses his thrusts to pull out, forcing a loud whine turned cry to crawl out of Eddie’s throat. 

Buck grabs Eddie’s waist, rolling him over onto his stomach. He pulls Eddie up on his knees, one of his hands sliding up his back, holding Eddie’s head down into the pillow. Buck's other hand wraps around both Eddie’s wrists, holding them crossed over his back. His grip is tight, pulling Eddie’s so their hips meet halfway. Skin slaps loudly in the room, Buck’s loud grunts and moans sound like a sweet, savory melody to Eddie’s ears. 

“You’re going to learn how to listen, princess. I suggest you start trying now,” Buck’s words vibrate through Eddie’s body, a loud whimper spilling out of him. 

Eddie can’t move, his body so blissed out that he can’t even think straight. His body clenches up, waves of pleasure crashing over Eddie like he’s never felt before. 

“Buck– I’m going to cum baby fuck yes keep going!” Eddie cries out, tears streaming down his cheeks, soaking into the pillowcase. 

“Cum from my cock baby, yeah let me see the mess you’ll make of yourself.” Buck thrusts get sloppy, his grip on Eddie’s wrists tightening. He lets go of Eddie’s head, smacking his ass a few times. “You should see the way your ass jiggles baby, fuck you’re so hot.” 

A loud sob cracks through Eddie’s chest, cuming hard against the sheets under him. His back arches, his eyes screwing shut. He falls limp against the bed, Buck’s hands wrapping around his waist to pull him back up. He thrusts a few more times, shouting Eddie’s name before cuming deep inside of him, fucking them both through their climax. 

They both fall limp on the bed, panting each other's air. Eddie soaks in the comfort of Buck on top of him, their bodies mending as one. 

He winces when Buck pulls out, feeling himself being turned around on his back. His body gets pulled over the bed, getting pressed against Buck’s chest. His own is rising and falling quickly, his body and mind absolutely fucked out. A soft pair of lips presses against his head, giving him quick, soft kisses. 

“Are you with me?” Buck's voice is soft, completely different from a few moments ago. 

Soft sobs still rack through Eddie’s body, nodding before intertwining his fingers with Buck’s. He rolls his head back into the crook of Buck’s neck, catching his breath. Buck rubs soft circles against Eddie’s hip, feathering kisses over his head and shoulder. A few beats pass before Buck breaks the newly found comfortable silence.

“What do you think about going out.. as boyfriends?” Buck’s words shake, an unreasonable fear laced in them.   

Eddie turns himself around so they’re face to face, his hand squeezing Buck’s three times. 

“Buck, I love you like it was my one life mission, like it’s the easiest thing in the world, the only thing that makes sense in the world. I am yours for the rest of our lives, and you don’t ever have to question or worry about it. I’m not going anywhere without you.” Eddie speaks slowly,  making sure Buck can feel how sincere he is with every word. 

Buck is quiet for a few moments, biting his lip before he smirks. “So is that a yes?” 

Eddie’s head falls forward on Buck’s chest, laughing into it. “Yes, you idiot.”

Buck is silent again for a few moments, both of them just soaking in each other's company. 

“Oh fuck–,” Buck sits up, lightly pushing Eddie aside. Eddie frowns, lifting himself to lie on his elbow. 

“What?” Eddie asks, his eyebrows quirked up in confusion. 

“Our In-N-Out is outside.” Buck stands up, throwing on a random pair of boxers that happen to be Eddie’s, before he heads towards the door. He turns back around, his eyes meeting Eddie’s. “Don’t go anywhere, I’m not finished with you yet.” 

Eddie’s insides turn with excitement, his dick already refilling at the thought of Buck fucking him into the mattress again. Eddie sends him a soft nod, watching as he disappears to grab their now cold food. 

A long ten minutes pass before Buck reappears, shoving his boxers down his legs before he climbs back into bed. He plants the bag of food in front of Eddie. 

“I heated it up for you, so you better eat it fast before it gets gross,” Buck grabs his own burger from the bag, taking a large bite. 

Eddie sits there in bed, staring at the man across from him for a few seconds. Reality sets in, that this is going to be his new life with Buck, and it’s better than he could have ever imagined.