Chapter Text
Tourjours pur. Always pure. A motto that is almost as ancient as the very house in which it belongs. There have been many different interpretations of the saying throughout the centuries - pure heart, pure soul, pure morals, pure magic - but somewhere along the way it adopted a less forgiving meaning. Pureblood. What runs through a person’s veins became what decided their worth, their honour, their class, if they were seen as royalty or vermin.
In a previous world, witches and wizards weren’t separated by their blood status, but instead by their affinity with the natural world. They lived in caves and forests, by lakes and mountains performing spells through rituals and potions and sacrifice: the purest form of magic was that done without wands, using only what the Earth provided and the magic that was gifted by one’s ancestors. Those with this magic kept themselves isolated from the rest of the world, staying within small covens and only ever interacting with those from other wizarding families for magical festivals or bonding ceremonies.
However, with each generation without any new blood, their natural magic began to deteriorate to the point where simple spells became difficult to perform without the aid of a magically induced wand. To combat this growing problem, some covens ventured into the muggle world in a search for any that could hold even a spark of magic in their blood and invited them into the wizarding world to share their knowledge of the natural world for the first time. Of the fifty-seven families that lived in Britain at the time, there were many that disagreed with this practice of sharing their magic and so forced themselves into an even more isolated life away from those which had adopted muggleborns into their sacred space. With this divide, however, there was ancient knowledge that was lost between the covens that could never be relearned, and so four mages from four different families came together with a revolutionary idea that would forever change the magical world and enter it into a new era of knowledge.
Salazar Slytherin, Godric Gryffindor, Rowena Ravenclaw and Helga Hufflepuff founded a school of witchcraft and wizardry in the hopes that their dying race would be able to return to its former glory once again. The one condition for this school however, was that any muggleborns found with magic would continue to be granted access to their knowledge and allowed to attend. The house of Slytherin was one of the thirty-one families that were against this ideology and so Salazar insisted that the pure mages be kept separated and safe from those that were trying to steal their magic for themselves. Thus Hogwarts was founded with its four houses.
Unsurprisingly, this separation of purebloods from other magic users did nothing to help the growing animosity between them but instead formed a toxic rift to splinter the magical world into a place of war and conflict caused by the prejudice that those pureblood families held as they tried desperately to hold onto any remaining power and influence they could find in this new wizarding society. One family in particular saw their chance early on and swiftly climbed their way to the very top of the social hierarchy - The Noble and Most Ancient House of Black became the equivalent of royalty in this new time of blood purity. With each generation of Blacks, they continued to hold onto their values with an unclenching iron fist but their original goal of preserving the ancient magics became distorted by the obsession of keeping the blood untainted by muggles. Tourjours pur became a law for The House of Black and muggleborns became the enemy - the very mud beneath their feet that were leaching their magic like parasites. Mudbloods were as good as animals: vicious and unmannered, no respect for the pureblood ancestors who's’ magic they had stolen, they were nothing like those with clean and pure blood who were actually deserving of their magical gift.
However, as Regulus Black looked around Platform nine & three-quarters he came to the terrifying realisation that he couldn't tell them apart. Children all around him stood with their own families, with their own luggage, saying their own goodbyes. Some of them looked just as frightened as he himself felt in that moment, not yet ready to leave the life he had grown to know and feel somewhat comfortable in. Sure, he was finally joining his cousins and brother at Hogwarts, he’s glad to not have to spend another year alone in that house but there were just so many people he didn't know, so many variables he hadn't planned for. So Regulus did what he always did when he was scared: he hid in plain sight; he observed; he catalogued any and all information he could gather from watching and listening.
There was a small family of three just a bit further down the platform from where he stood with his own family, they were wearing strange clothes and talking in a language he didn't quite recognise but thought sounded Eastern European. As someone who had perfected the signature Black ability of keeping all emotion from showing at a very young age, he was utterly disgusted at the clear display of emotions that the parents were trying to hide but grossly failing at. Silent tears were falling from the woman’s eyes and her bottom lip was wobbling as she looked upon her daughter, who was talking animatedly about something - probably meaningless to Regulus - while paying her parents little to no attention and was instead staring around her in complete wonder. Her father, to his credit, was doing a much better job at concealing his emotions but the uneasiness and mistrust of his surroundings was still painted plainly on his unusually pale face.
Maybe he’s been petrified, Regulus theorised, or most likely just in shock. Muggles.
Once he had deduced their heritage, he stopped paying them any mind, not seeing the point in wasting his energy focusing on lesser beings. There were a few families that he did recognise of course, having been forced to attend many pureblood events by his parents. For example, Regulus spotted the Rosiers stood in silent company with the Lestranges: one of the Rosier twins, Pandora, had after all been promised to the youngest of the Lestrange brothers, Rabastan and so had to make at least a few public appearances together. Regulus felt a rare burst of sympathy for the girl at being promised to such pathetic excuse for a wizard at such a young age, but at least it wasn't Rodolphus, he was already promised to Bella, who was quite possibly the only person who could match his temperament - she’d have him under control in no time. Fortunately for him, Regulus had yet to be promised to anyone due to his inability to play nice with others, as his mother so often chastised him for, but since he was neither a witch nor the heir, it wasn’t as pressing of a concern to marry him off quickly.
“Now remember what we said Regulus.” His father’s empty yet commanding voice was accompanied by a firm hand on his shoulder. To anyone watching it could be interpreted as a supportive gesture from father to son, but Regulus knew by the bruising way his father’s fingers dug into him that it was a warning of what would happen if he messed up and brought more shame to their family.
This was all Sirius’ fault. Sirius, who just had to go and get himself sorted into Gryffindor. Sirius, who left him alone to suffer their parents’ anger alone for a whole year. Sirius, who had run off to find his bloodtraitor friends the second they got to the platform, leaving Regulus lost and alone yet again. Sirius, who was Regulus’ biggest hero, his older brother, his protector, the person that Regulus had always and would always look to when things got scary. A part of Regulus hoped that he would also end up in Gryffindor so that he could be with his brother, a part of Regulus that he kept buried so deep in his chest out of fear that anyone would see his traitorous thoughts.
“Don’t worry father,” Regulus had to let go of that dream now, before he ended up disappointed, “There’s no way I’ll be anything but a Slytherin.”
For it was true, out of all of his cousins, he was the most Slytherin of them, he wasn’t smart enough for Ravenclaw like Narcissa, wasn’t kind enough for Hufflepuff like Andromeda, wasn’t brave enough for Gryffindor like Sirius. He most certainly wasn’t like Bellatrix, who if it weren't for being a Black, Regulus believed could have ended up in any house she wanted (minus Hufflepuff maybe). No, Regulus Black was a Slytherin through and though - he was smart and enjoyed learning but only so that he could further his own power, he was never brave and never cared for kindness - he was a selfish bastard that looked out for himself and played the narrative so that it would always end in his favour, even if that meant hiding behind his brother from their parents’ punishments. He could basically be Slytherin’s mascot if they had such stupid things.
“Oh and here comes your cousins!” Regulus had never been so happy to hear his mother speak. “Merlin, Cygnus really needs to teach that girl some decorum.”
We all know how he has tried, mother, but there is no taming Bella.
Even after seventeen years of being the eldest daughter of the Most Noble House of Black, Bellatrix still managed to draw much unwanted attention as she skipped down the platform right towards her mortified aunt and, without even acknowledging her or her uncle, swung an arm over her ever relieved youngest cousin before they set of towards the train. Regulus allowed her to lead him away without any protest or so much as a glance back: she was always saving him when Sirius wasn’t around.
“So little Reggie, how you feeling about finally joining the big kids?” Not many people got away with calling him by such childish nicknames, but Bellatrix was family - one of the ones that actually felt like family - so she sometimes got a free pass.
“Leave him be Bella, you're going to embarrass him in front of the other first years!” Andromeda, always the sensible one on the surface but when one has spent as long with her as Regulus had, he could easily spot that she was in fact being no help at all.
“Oh leave me alone Andy, not even I could ruin his dark and moody reputation!” No matter how hard they tried, Cygnus and Druella Black were never able to reshape Bella’s laugh into anything other than the cackle she so enjoyed letting out in the most inappropriate of circumstances, such as right then. When it came to Bellatrix, there was a lot that Regulus was willing to just put up with, such as her attempts at embarrassing him, but the pinch to his cheek was most definitely not one of those things, so, after batting her hand away, he finally wriggled his way out from under her arm to walk next to his preferred cousin, Narcissa, who understood personal space.
“Don’t you two have prefect rounds?”
“Oh shit yeah!” Where Andromeda learned such language was beyond Regulus, but he didn’t care enough to look into it and it seemed himself and the others had actually picked up some of it themselves in the last couple years. Whatever the reason, it got both her and Bellatrix out of his hair as they ran off to the train to get ready for their rounds. Regulus had no idea who let either of them become prefects but as sixth and seventh years they had more responsibilities than most other students which included having to patrol the train carriages just after they depart and just before they arrive at Hogwarts. This left him alone with Narcissa, who never bothered with useless greetings given that they had seen each other just a week prior when shopping for school items. It was a comfortable and much appreciated silence that was one of the main reasons they enjoyed each others’ company so much more than the rest of their loud family. On this particular day, however, Regulus didn’t want to be left alone to his thoughts, didn't want to let the fear and insecurity spread any further without a distraction.
“What if I don’t get into Slytherin?” There was no doubt in his mind that was even a possibility but the thought still grew thorns in Regulus’ nervous system. The fear that his parents had drilled into him since before he knew what fear was. The uncertainty that Sirius had brought to the surface with his stunt the previous year.
“You will.” And that was that, no bullshit, no trying to care for his feelings in a gentle way, just straight to exactly what he wanted to hear. Being four years younger than her sisters, Narcissa had been forced to spend much more time alone in her house than Regulus had after Sirius left and it had hardened her far beyond her age. She understood words far better than most adults and infinitely times better than any other twelve-year-old should. That was why she was the one Regulus always confided in, when he needed words as opposed to the soft comfort that he got from Sirius.
“Yeah.” Nothing else was said after that, the two youngest siblings of the House of Black walked in silence towards the train, not bothering to rush to get a compartment, for Regulus already knew one would be waiting for them thanks to Bellatrix probably stealing it from some terrified first years who hadn't yet learned who the Black were, hadn’t learned that they always got what they wanted one way or another.
Sirius
He didn't mean to leave Regulus behind, he really didn’t, his plan had been to bring his brother onto the train with him and have him sit with Sirius and his friends. But then he felt his mother’s patronising glare and saw James on the other side of the platform with his bright laughter and easy presence, so in proper Gryffindor fashion, he acted before thinking and ran straight for his best mate. Once there all thought of his family left his mind as he launched himself into James, who somehow managed to catch him before they both fell to the floor, and he finally felt at home again. They said a quick but meaningful goodbye to Effie and Monty - who were, by Sirius’ definition, the best parents ever - and headed onto the train in search of Remus and Peter, or an empty carriage depending on if the other boys had arrived yet.
They ended up finding Remus alone in a compartment towards the back of the train and Sirius immediately plopped himself down next to the young boy and threw his legs over Remus’, James sprawled himself across the bench opposite them and didn’t waste a moment before he began animatedly telling them about his summer.
“Dad took me to Germany to watch the quidditch where the Holyhead Harpies were playing one of the Germain teams. It was amazing! We won of course but oh my God you should have been there, it was…” Normally Sirius would have enthusiastically joined in any conversation revolving around quidditch, especially with James, but he was still adjusting to being home, being away from them. His fight or flight hadn’t adjusted to the feeling of safety quite yet, so he settled in and slowly relaxed to the sound of James’ voice and the feeling of Remus’ hand placed carefully on his leg.
Eventually, Peter joined them and James made room for him without ever stopping his in depth retelling of the game and after getting himself comfortable, Peter joined in the conversation, having desperately wanted to go but being unable to get tickets. Even Remus made a few comments here and there about the teams’ strategy and the three boys allowed Sirius his time to simply bask in the feeling of having his friends there. He was home. He hadn’t felt this safe and relaxed since before they broke up for summer and so inevitably drifted off into the first peaceful sleep in months.
***
Sir… Siri…Sirius…
“SIRIUS!”
“What! What? I’m awake, I’m awake. Promise.” Sirius bolted upright so quickly his vision began to swim in darkness, forcing him to shake his head to clear out the groggy remnants of sleep. Once he adjusted to being back in the land of the living, he finally registered his cousins stood over him, it was then that he realised he must have fallen onto the floor in the panic to wake up for everything seemed much taller and there was a growing ache forming in his back. Andromeda had an amused look on her face with just the usual hint of worry that was always present whenever she looked his way since last year. Bellatrix, however, was bent in half laughing her signature laugh, hands on her knees and what looked to be tears in her eyes.
“Bitch.” Sirius muttered under his breath as he pulled himself to his feet before noticing the snickering that was coming from behind him. The thing about Sirius’ friends was that they were terrified of his family, specifically Bellatrix and Narcissa, which was only natural but made it very difficult whenever Sirius wanted to be around both groups at once. Remus was being respectfully silent while trying to keep the amused smirk off his face, poor Peter looked white as a sheet in the presence of a cackling Bellatrix, but James - brilliant, confident, perfect James - he was laughing almost as much as Bella was. Traitor.
“Oh Merlin, I needed that, thanks Siri.” Bella said after finally pulling herself together long enough to form words, “Now c’mon sleepy head, we’re nearly at Hogwarts and Reggie isn’t too happy you ditched him.” In her defence, the glare she sent James’ way wasn’t nearly one of her worst ones.
“Shit!” Did I really sleep the whole train ride? Reggie’s gonna kill me.
With a rushed see you later to his friends, Sirius sprinted out of the compartment and sped off in search of his little brother, nearly crashing straight into multiple people along the way. A still very amused Bellatrix and Andromeda followed slowly behind, finishing off the rest of their prefect patrol. When he finally found the compartment his family had occupied, panting, he collapsed next to Regulus, who looked anything but impressed, as he fought to regain his ability to breathe normally again.
“Reggie, I am so sorry. I was gonna come back as soon as possible but I seemed to have fallen asleep and no one thought to wake me until Bella and Andy came by on patrol. I really am sorry. How are you doing? Are you well? Excited, I bet! Or are you nervous? Don’t worry, I was hella nervous this time last year too. But everything’s gonna be alright, I promise.” He knew he was rambling but nobody was stopping him so he just carried on repeating the same few things over and over. I’m sorry. Are you okay? Everything’s gonna be okay. Regulus and Narcissa continued to let him make a fool of himself with fond annoyance in their eyes until Bellatrix and Andromeda finished with their patrol and entered the compartment, settling down for the short remainder of their journey.
Even though he was no longer with James, Sirius managed to let out a breath of relief at having his family all together on their way to Hogwarts: this would be the first and last year they would all attend at the same time before Bella graduated and would eventually leave them to become a Lestrange. As much as he tried not to think about the future, he couldn’t stop the pain from gripping his heart at the thought of his favourite cousin no longer being with them. He wasn’t ready to protect the others on his own, wasn’t ready to lose the only other person in the world that understood what it meant to be the eldest sibling in a Black house. She had always been there, all their lives she had been there to raise them when their parents failed and shielded them from the pain, shining like the warrior star that she was. Sirius admired her more than anyone else, as a child he used to follow her around the manor copying everything she did in an attempt to be just like his oldest cousin, getting into all kinds of trouble together. Truthfully, he firmly believed that Bella should be the heir of Black instead of him - she was by far the strongest and smartest of them all, while he had next to no qualities required to be Lord Black some day.
“There, now that we’re all together,” Sirius cringed at the look Andromeda sent him before she quickly turned to Narcissa with giddy excitement, “We can talk about the important stuff. What positions are you two going for in quidditch try outs?”
The shift in Sirius was immediate, his face split into a huge grin and his eyes sparkled as they darted between Narcissa and Bellatrix, puffing up his chest in pride as he prepared to declare his answer.
“Chaser,” Damn you, Cissy, “It’s the most honourable position of course and requires the most skill.”
“Nuh uh! Beaters require way more skill!” The flash of pride in Bella’s eyes was all Sirius needed to know he had made the right decision, following in her footsteps yet again.
“Swinging around a bat is not skill, anyone could do that.”
“If I remember correctly, the last time you played beater, you ended up with a bludger to the face Cissy.” The unexpected comment caused Sirius to whip his head towards his brother and stare in shock at Regulus having sided against Cissy in something quidditch related, they were usually firmly on the same side of these discussions against Sirius and Bella while Andy played devil's advocate for both sides. Narcissa turned half a shade darker at the reminder of the game they all played together two summers prior which ended with her in St Mungos because of said incident.
“Bella ripped my new dress, how can you possibly expect someone to focus on a crazy murder ball when such a tragedy has occurred?” Said like it was the most reasonable explanation ever, her back straight as ever and the most serious expression Sirius had ever seen, almost like she was still pained by the ruining of the dress.
“Aww, poor prissy Cissy,” Bellatrix pouted, “Well I better not see you distracted like that when you’re playing for Slytherin this year!”
“Aye aye, Captain.”
“Don’t worry Cissy, I’ll go easy on you. Make sure I don't hit the bludger too close to your pretty little head. Just try not to cry too much when you lose, alright?” As much as Sirius wished he could be playing on the same team as his cousins, he was so looking forward to being the reason Slytherin’s winning streak ended.
“What makes you think Gryffindor will even be able to score any goals? I highly doubt the team has improved much from previous years.” Credit where credit's due, Andy was an extraordinary keeper, one of the main reasons no other house had even gotten close to beating Slytherin since she joined the team but her confidence would be her downfall.
“We’ll see.” Sirius could see the strategic advantage in them underestimating his house so he gladly left them in the dark about James’ godlike ability as a chaser and - since the Prewitt twins graduated and opened up the positions - how well he and Marlene already worked in perfect sync with each other. There was no doubt in Sirius’ mind that the three of them would easily pass try outs and would successfully secure the quidditch house cup in their first year on the team.
After that they drifted into easy conversation about the upcoming school year and advised Regulus on which classes actually mattered as well as which teachers were easiest to suck up to (cough, Slughorn, cough). Bellatrix expressed her complete lack of worry for her N.E.W.T.S which were taking place at the end of the school year, but given her success in all her subjects, it was no surprise that she was confident in her ability to get Outstanding in most, if not all, of them. The train finally slowed to a halt as Bella was complaining about how she could have past charms in third year with her eyes closed and Sirius had no doubt on the validity of that statement. After all, pureblood families like their own were exposed to complex magic their whole lives and were already familiar with most of the curriculum Hogwarts had to offer - which worked well in Sirius’ favour as it meant he could put the majority of his time into messing around with his friends and planning the next elaborate prank.
They made their way off the train and onto the platform that was crawling with students rushing to get a carriage, and Bella and Andy made their way to the prefect carriage in order to arrive at the castle before the rest of the student body. Sirius could feel his brother trying to suppress his nerves next to him as Regulus took an almost unnoticeable step closer to his side, so he and Narcissa silently accompanied him on his way to the boats to wish him good luck.
“Don’t worry Reggie, it’ll be over before you know it. Just come find one of us once you get sorted, yeah?” Deep down Sirius knew that it would never be himself that Regulus would go to, because he knew in his bones that his brother was not like him, was not a traitor to his family. He knew Reggie would be a Slytherin just like his cousins and parents and grandparents and every other Black that had ever attended Hogwarts, but he hoped otherwise, he hoped that he could be the one to keep his baby brother from being poisoned by the Slytherin prejudices. Narcissa nodded in agreement and Sirius was at least somewhat calmed by the knowledge that Regulus would have their cousins there with him - no one would dare to mess with a Black while Bellatrix was around.
They bid farewell and Sirius stayed to watch as his brother climbed into a boat and set off towards the castle, only looking away once Narcissa encouraged him away by a tug on his elbow. For the first time ever, it was Regulus leaving Sirius behind.