Chapter Text
The white void he was in was exactly what he had expected. Simple white silence, not even the sound of nondescript rushing he thought would be in such a place as infinite and colourless as this was. Nope. Nothing but silence… Well, actually, maybe this was the most colourful room possible, since white was just a mixture of all the colours at once. Maybe the silence was already driving him insane.
Something shifted behind him, and he resisted the small urge to turn from the gate in front of him and either attack or cower beneath the sheer presence of the being. Last time, he had been too high on adrenaline to notice. It was truly unnerving… And also incredibly curious. It spoke with its illusory mouth in a voice that he could almost hear himself in, but at the same time it was anything but. “…Welcome back, young alchemist.” It said, “I would usually send you back, but unfortunately, we must have the displeasure of speaking for a while.”
“Oh, great, just what I came here for.” He said, finally turning and staring at the vague, human-esque shape that mirrored his own body. Again, unnerving, and yet he couldn’t help but want to look further into whatever this Truth really was. Despite his sarcastic tone, he was being completely truthful. He had come to talk. They both knew it. Neither particularly wanted to talk, since one was the very laws that the other seemed to defy. “Can you-“
“No. The price for greater numbers of souls as you have, releasing them, in turn fixing you, the price is far too great. There’s nothing you could possibly offer me in life that would cover the cost. Sorry, Little Alchemist, that actually might be impossible!”
…There goes the smugness of Truth again. Bastard. “Who are you calling- You know what? You’re not worth it. Go shut up and fall through this void we’re in. Is that all?” He said, nearly deadpan. Today, hell, the entire past week had been such a shithole that he just wasn’t in the mood for screaming at someone for calling him little. Still, he found himself curling his hands into fists at the thought of it. Truth really was a bastard.
The smug smile the figure outlined in static had disappeared nigh instantly, turning into what, if it had eyes, would probably be an empty, emotionless stare. “No. I have a proposition for you, Edward Hohenheim. An expensive one, but one not without its benefits.”
What. “What?” Full, actual, name too? Wow, a serious Truth is actually kind of scary. Who would have thought.
“Asking for further information without accepting isn’t necessarily free, either. This is an important business, one I can’t let you have the knowledge of if you refuse. Do you accept it?”
Ed wasn’t sure if he likes the new tone Truth had. It was cold, calculating, and one that he actually could hear himself in. It was one he expected from someone in the royal family, formal with a threat behind it. He tensed at the thought that god is threatening him, a 15 year old atheist kid that never wanted to be involved in this.
“Is it really that serious that you can’t even tell me what I’ll be getting into? Can’t you just erase my memory of it if I refuse..?”
“Memory erasure is the only thing I can do as an exchange that is easily overcome by an event or simply thinking about it. I’m not stupid enough to think that you, who have come this far without dying, wouldn’t manage to figure it out.”
“…Can I take that as a compliment?—“
“No.” Truth seemed slightly exasperated with him now. Goal accomplished.
“Alright, give me a second to think about it, at least.” He sighed, crossing his arms.
Something so important he can’t leave with the knowledge of it without accepting the terms which came with the knowledge. It was easy to understand why, really; if he knew about it and went around telling people without accepting, then there would be next to no repercussions. But if he was directly involved, then… Depending what it was, then he probably couldn’t go telling without outing himself eventually. Not bad.
Knowing even the barest of details about Truth, this could either be his worst nightmare or the one thing he’s unknowingly dreamed of. Probably, based on his luck in life so far, it would be the former. And really? That just made him want to accept the offer more. If it was his worst nightmare, then how many others would have the same or similar nightmare to him? Who would Truth go to to get its bidding done for it? Some innocent civilian who had nothing to do with this whole thing, especially when he had as much relevancy possible regarding the entire shitshow? He couldn’t let someone innocent do his unfinished business for him.
Truth was right coming to him for this. He could deny it. He could up and say no, fuck off to Truth and nothing could be done. But that wasn’t how Ed worked. They both knew that.
He scowled and glared at the hole in the universe before him. “I hate you, bastard. Spill.”
It only grinned back with its signature stupid smugness it always did. “I knew you would say yes.” Of course it did. “I’m assuming you know about your father and the Dwarf in the Flask?”
“How could I fuckin’ forget that, asshole…” He grumbled. Seriously, Truth was a bitch. It already knew that because Truth knew everything. He wished it would just get to the point sometimes.
“Yes, well…” Truth hesitated for a moment, and wasn’t that a supreme sign that everything was astronomically fucked to pieces. “I’ll just be honest, Edward, you were never supposed to exist. You’ve derailed the entire future of this universe and everything is incredibly unstable because of it. In your place was supposed to be Van Hohenheim, and you aren’t exactly equipped to deal with the possible collapse of this universe and the whole thing the Dwarf in the Flask is going to cause. You’re going to need something else. Something that I can offer you. Something that will save everything you know, in the end.”
…
“Is the pause for dramatic effect or are you just annoying?”
“…I regret letting you come here as often as you seem to like. It was for dramatic effects, and I would appreciate it if you wouldn’t ruin my speech.” No way, was Truth- Did Truth have this thing planned? If that was true then that’s hilarious. It must’ve practiced in the mirror. The thought made him absentmindedly chuckle, before It started its stupid speech again. “Gods cannot interfere with the world of mortals, but they can have mortals do the meddling for them. Edward Hohenheim, I would like you to be my pawn. Underling, subordinate, bishop, saint, whatever you want to refer to yourself as, I couldn’t care less. With that, I can provide you enough information without the exchange you've been paying to come here.
“If you play by my strings in the overworld, I can give you instructions on what to do when the times come to fix the imbalance of the universe before it collapses in on itself. This could take a while, and before you die, you’ll either need to pass on the role of pawn to someone trusted or find a way to see it through before then. It won’t be an easy task. But seeing as you’ve already accepted…”
Ed stared, scrutinizing the figure in front of him. He could almost be shocked, but he was still shocked by everything else that’s happened. Wait… “You said death. I thought I couldn’t die, not anymore. Not after the incident with the King and… You know. Stuff. What do you mean I can still die?”
“I suppose this goes under the list of information I can now give you without price. Well, you are host to around half a million souls. Your life will passively drain on these souls, and instead of aging you, it will age one of them until death of old age. The cycle will then repeat, mixing in the fact that you definitely will get fatally injured many many times on your journey, using up these souls as well, death might come sooner than you-“
“Hold the fuck up, you’re saying me living drains the life of half the people of my country?!” He wasn’t exactly a ‘live for Xerxes die for Xerxes’ type of citizen, but still—the fact that him being alive did that? What the fuck? That was on another level of fucked to pieces. That was so fucked up. “I-I can’t live like that. You can’t make me.”
Something akin to either pity or sympathy radiated off of Truth, and Ed didn’t want to think about that. “You might not have a choice. What is there worth that amount of souls? Human souls- they’re valuable things. Setting that many free and sending them to where they belong would cost more than you have to give.”
He looked around his immediate surroundings, finding nothing but Truth itself, and- “What about that thing?” He said, pointing a thumb towards the giant grey door that rested silently behind him. He still barely knew what that even was. “That looks important, free them with that.”
“That is important, more so to you now than ever. And still, it would only be worth a fraction of the souls you hold. You can’t free them all, and even then you need to stay alive long enough to see this through.”
“Don’t be an ass, Truth, you know me! I’ll just go insane knowing that- That I’m-“ He couldn’t say it without wanting to violently spill his lunch onto the void-white floors. “I just can’t. Say something, there has to be something that will allow me to live long enough to do this myself and free these people. I don’t want this, don’t make me take it, dammit! I’ll find a way with or without you!”
The look Truth gave him, even without eyes, was expressive. It knew him more than he knew himself as much as he hated to admit it, and after time, knowing what he knew— they both knew that one day, sooner than they needed, he would break. Shatter. No coming back from that, from guilt-induced mania mixed with immortality. No one could stay around long enough to help him get back on track. He would have no one… Immortality was more a curse than a blessing, Ed was starting to realise. Who would want this? Some foolish King, maybe. Good thing he was used to being alone on the streets.
“I know you would, and it would break you more than the guilt would. If there was another way… What lengths are you willing to go to free these souls? What are you willing to sacrifice? Before you say anything rash, calm yourself, and answer truthfully, Edward. This is something I need to know and not to ‘guess’ based on how much I know of you.”
They stared, and Ed’s skin slowly started to feel less like his own. They wanted freedom. He could feel it, they—all the souls, his country, they were loud so loud it was all just noise noise noise—wanted out and they could tell he was onto something. It was too much. He couldn’t live like this. How could anyone without going completely fucking insane? His skin didn’t feel like it belonged on his flesh and his heart beat a second off than when it should have. Maybe it was just delusions, but still, it was too much.
He calmed his breathing, took the mimicry of a calm stance, and said truthfully “Anything.”
Silence for longer than there should have been.
“There is nothing in life you could trade me to free those souls.”
“Then why-“
“Listen, Edward. There is nothing in life that you can trade me to free them. There are domains outside of life, and some more important and valuable than it could ever be. Find one, choose, and I’ll tell you.”
The pieces clicked. Ah, Truth… Always hiding behind another truth. Riddles and codes were almost a second language to him now. “You sneaky bastard…” The only thing… “The only thing that would allow me to live long enough and free everyone is trading you my death, isn’t it? That’s cruel.”
“Do you want it?”
Without hesitation, “Yes, dammit, it’ll be better than this.” The feeling, his skin crawling with feelings and sensations that weren’t his own. Voices screaming at him from beyond. He was only 15. Maybe if it was his father, he could find a way to deal with it, but not him. That’s not who he was. If living and dying and living again brought that much pain to other people, he didn’t want to continue on. Hell, he probably couldn’t. It was painful and more so than he knew how to deal with.
“Very well.” Said Truth, nodding slightly. “I guess you are a true immortal now. You will never die… but you are also more bound to the laws, since you will no longer be a human Philosopher's Stone.”
“I do not give a single fuck.”
An amused huff left Truth. “Of course not. Why would you? Ever the self-sacrifice in the face of others. It’s admirable, in a messed up way. Certainly not a good trait to have, but in this case, it’ll do. The exchange will go through when you leave, as do all of the ones we make here.”
“Yeah, sure.” The sensation died down, as did the thoughts of others. Voices. He’s had to deal with it for a week now, and already it was fraying his mind. At least they’ll be free. “Hey, where do these souls go after?”
“Oh, just the domain of Death. Closest thing to an afterlife there is. Not Hell, or Heaven, but humans seem to like it. Death itself is quite nice, I would say, nicer than I am at least.”
“Damn, why couldn’t I be a prophet of Death or something? That sounds way cooler, too…”
“Because, you defy its very domain now. Almost like you did mine, just a while ago. Death doesn’t get involved with immortals.”
…
“We are so far off track.”
“Yes. Yes, we are. Do you have anything else to ask me for the time being? You can always talk with me at will, considering your status, and without even doing human transmutation on yourself. You don’t have to think too hard about it now.”
Ed sighed, recalling some of the earlier conversation. It had said something to the effects of this whole Saint of Truth or whatever he was now wouldn’t be free, right? Was that his imagination? Whatever. It probably cost something. “What do I have to give for becoming your pawn? Seems like an awfully high rank with a shit ton of perks, it can’t be free. Not by you especially.”
Truths asshole smile appeared again, and Ed couldn’t help but regret asking. “Just an arm and a leg! Or two.”
More incredulous staring on Ed’s part. “…You’re taking all my limbs. That… Is wonderful. Truth, you’re a bitch, you know that? I’m your untitled holy figurehead now, I’m telling everyone the god I have to worship is an asshole and a bitch and no one should ever worship you.”
Truth just laughed. Laughed. At him! “You’re a bitch!” He shouted.
“Is that all?” It said after reigning in its laughter. It took it way longer than Ed wanted it to.
He hummed, after glaring at the figure. “I did human transmutation, right?”
“Yes, that is how someone gets here.”
“Can I have fangs?”
This time, it was Truth's turn to stare incredulously. Ha, payback, bastard. “You… Don’t need human transmutation for that. That would also cost you. Wouldn’t it be easier to wait and do it yourself?”
Ed pretended to think about it. Nope, he wanted to be annoying and thought that fangs would be pretty cool. “Yeah but you can do it right now.”
“Are you sure I am the bitch, here?”
“Sure am. I’m your pawn now, at least be a good puppeteer!”
“Yeah.” Truth sighed more aggressively than need be. “I’ll give you fangs for some blood, you’ll lose it when you get your limbs taken anyway, you won’t even notice. Have fun getting used to it.”
“Cool, that’s all.” Goal was accomplished. Get some more answers, be annoying, and some other unforeseen things that he now possessed. Like immortality. True, definite immortality, cursed upon him by the closest scientific thing to a god there was. He… Would try and cope with that later.
“Get out of my house, Edward Hohenheim, and please make your stay in the overworld as lengthy as possible.”
The giant grey door, or Gate, he supposed, opened slowly. Black hands started to take hold of Ed’s limbs, like snakes, writhing with something he could probably find the answer to if he went far enough down through the Gate. Speaking of going through the Gate… Oh, shit. This was possibly the biggest sacrifice anyone could possibly make. How far would he go, until he found himself on the ground bleeding out in the comfortable space of his own world? How much would be stuffed into his head this time? He was both excited and so, so terrified. He wasn’t sure he would be able to take it.
“You’ll be fine. You won’t need it much, but you’re still under my protection, for the time being. Don’t worry, and good luck. Seriously though, don’t come back for a while, I like my void!”
Strangely enough, those words—they were comforting. Reassuring. And that just pissed him off, because someone like Truth shouldn’t be a damn reassurance to him! Truth was an asshole! “I’m coming back twice a week whether you like it or not, bastard!” He shouted just as the door was closing, the hands ever-encompassing, writhing and pulling him down into the depths of Truth's domain. Eventually, it would spit him out where he was supposed to be. But that might not be for a while.
Oh, this was the closest thing to Hell there was, Ed was sure of that. Out of everything, between the silence and Truth itself, going through this door was the worst part. Information his mind didn’t know what to do with, seeing his very life flash before his eyes; oftentimes, it left him disoriented for hours at a time while he sorted out all of this new information and it found places inside his brain. Hopefully whatever bullshit Truth was up to would help that. He couldn’t be out of commission for long, he had technology to invent so he could walk properly again and not be some sad… Bean. What the fuck, he was just going to be a bean. That was embarrassing to the next level…
It was then that Ed realised he was sinking, falling through the Gate, but it wasn’t as overstimulating as it had been. Clearly he was still absorbing the information at incredible speeds, as he just fell faster and faster, but he could handle it. Somehow. Truth was definitely up to some bullshit, messing with his mind, probably.
Suddenly something came to mind. Had Truth said he wasn’t supposed to exist?
Something about the multiverse and alternate timelines and butterfly effects came to mind, but he was already falling into his own reality when he started trying to piece it together. A calm, empty, and comfortable darkness enveloped him. He was conscious just long enough to think thank Truth that there aren’t any more screams in my skull. And he was just out of it enough to actually mean it genuinely.
Damn Truth bastard.