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Gyuvin is fucked.
There’s a code that all hitmen follow. A secret code if you want to stay in the society’s good graces so to speak. And he had broken it.
To be more exact, Yujin had broken it on his behalf, but still.
(Yes, Yujin had apologized for posting the pic of their joint kill to Instagram. No, he did not realize he had posted to his public account instead of his private.)
Which is how the most notorious gang in the city finds out about one of their top lieutenants’ brains being plastered all over the train platform of Gangnam Station. (Not his most covert kill.)
Rule #4. No grandstanding, no bragging about completed hits.
So he can’t really blame them for putting a bounty on his head.
Gyuvin is fucked.
“Did the bounty have to be so big?”
Gunwook looks entirely nonplussed at Gyuvin bemoaning the end of his life. Sipping his soda like he doesn’t have a care in the world. (To be fair, Gunwook is the best information broker in the city. Entirely untouchable. No one would dare try to kill him.)
“How much?”
Gyuvin groans.
“Three million.”
Gunwook lets out a low whistle.
“Damn.”
“Right?”
“Well, good luck with that.”
Gyuvin is running in the dark, blood soaking into his shirt from the bullet. There’s someone after him, and he can hear the echo of his name being yelled.
It’s getting closer, louder.
“Gyuvin. Gyuvin. Gyuvin.”
He wakes with a start only to see no angry gangster, just the concerned face of his husband Ricky peering down at him.
“Are you okay?”
His disorientation slowly ebbs, groaning as he gets up off the couch.
“I think I fell asleep in the middle of making dinner.”
Ricky laughs.
“We’re lucky you didn’t burn the house down.”
Gyuvin watches as Ricky finishes making the pasta with a perfect white wine sauce. Listens as Ricky vents about how awful work was, about the impossible demands of some clients and a rival company ruining a business venture.
It isn’t until they’re climbing into bed that the lightbulb goes off.
“Wait, we’re married.”
“Umm, yes?”
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[DISCUSSION] I [27M] am trying to divorce my husband [27M] because I may or may not be a hitman who now has a hit out on them in the witness protection program. Best way to bring it up?
u/gyubbark • 7h
SO. i don’t have the easiest job. in fact, i shouldn’t even be talking about it, but i don’t want the LOML to get killed be sad so yay here i am talking about it. kinda.
so HYPOTHETICALLY…? if one were to be a really good hitman accountant (not to brag), but then discovered that i pissed off the wrong people who will inevitably find out my real identity (courtesy of a fuckup by their now ex best friend)... what would be the best way to protect the LOML?
divorce him, right?
now HEAR ME OUT. i have been thinking it through, and it’s the only way. i don’t want him to be killed sad. did anyone else know that marriages are registered publicly?? like you can look that shit up apparently?
long story short, i need to divorce my husband so he doesn’t find out about my maybe illegal double life. what do fam?
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3.3k ... | 97% Upvoted
Top Comments
moooooo • 7h
hypothetically... DON'T BREAK HIS HEART??
... ⤺Reply ↑ 1038 ↓ 58
haohaoma • 4h
isn't the first rule of witness protection to not talk about witness protection?? lol
... ⤺ ↑ 597 ↓ 13
gyubbark • 4h
no that's fight club
... ⤺ ↑ 831 ↓ 103
rubberduckie • 2h
...so you're trying not to make him dead sad by... making him sad? p.s. this is a troll post right? RIGHT?
... ⤺ ↑ 105 ↓
gyubbark • 1h
well when you put it that way...
... ⤺ ↑ ↓ 19
Gyuvin discovers that there is actually no good way to tell your husband that you’ve been lying to him for the better part of the last six years.
“He’s going to hate me.”
“Maybe.”
He shoots Gunwook an affronted look.
“Aren’t you supposed to be supportive? Like telling me it’s going to be okay?”
“It’s going to be okay.”
“Sarcastic much?”
Gyuvin groans, stabbing the egg in his ramen with his chopsticks.
“I’d be better off dead. Maybe I should just give myself up to the bad guys. It shouldn’t take them long to find me. Even with Yujin wiping our digital footprint.”
Gunwook shrugs.
“Look on the bright side, if you’re dead then that solves the problem of telling Ricky you’re a big fat liar.”
Gyuvin nearly throws his bowl at Gunwook's head.
He’s not a big fat liar.
He’s only lied about some things. Like his job. And his family. And his childhood. And about having a pet dog when he was little. (He did not, it was the neighbor’s dog.)
Fuck.
“Hey, would you still love me if, hypothetically speaking, I lied to you about something?”
Ricky eyes him pointedly from the other end of the couch.
“I know you didn’t do the dishes last night already.”
Gyuvin can feel himself sweating bullets.
(Is this what it feels like to be dying?)
“Nevermind.”
It’s unfair that Ricky is perfect.
Perfect face, perfect personality.
Perfect husband who would definitely kill him if he found out Gyuvin has been lying. And killing people.
(He suspects Ricky would be less bothered by the killing.)
“Okay, spill it.”
Gyuvin startles at Ricky’s sharp tone, almost having drifted off to the feeling of Ricky running his fingers through his hair.
“There’s something bothering you, Kim Gyuvin. And I need to know now.”
Ricky’s no-nonsense voice.
The one that gets Gyuvin on his knees.
“...and that’s why we need to divorce. Not because I want to. Because I love you. And don’t want you to get taken out by some mobster.”
Gyuvin shoots Ricky a pleading look, begging for forgiveness.
There’s a long drawn out silence before Ricky finally speaks.
“Wait, you’re the one that killed my top lieutenant?"