Archive of Our Own

Jinx liked loose clothing. She hated it when it was constricting and skin-tight, it always made it feel like she was being strangled or wanted to scrape her skin off. 

Silco’s eyes bugged out of his head the first time he saw her in a crop top. He asked her in a faint voice if that was what she really wanted to wear. She heard him tell Sevika that he thought it was a phase, so she wore it even more just to spite him. 

It didn’t hurt that they were comfortable. 

She liked the feeling of air ghosting over her belly. It was exhilarating to expose so much soft flesh to her enemies. Knowing that something could pierce through her at any moment always got her adrenaline up. It was a taunt and a tease, egging her prey to dare to take their shot. 

If it was up to her, she’d change nothing about her outfit. She liked it. It was practical. She’d worn the style for years and it hadn’t failed her yet. 

But as she wiggled her way into the spot of a chem-baron, she kept hearing the ghost of Silco nag her about presentation. 

I taught you better than this. What have I said?

He was always there, lingering just out of her sight. 

“Always dress like you’re going to see your worst enemy?” Jinx had answered first. There was a niggling in the back of her mind of asking Silco why he dressed the way he did. “Style is a way to say who you are without having to speak.” 

It never made much sense to her as a kid. Growing up with Vander, clothes were clothes, and Jinx didn’t care what she wore as long as it was soft and not full of holes. Silco was much more invested in what she looked like. His taste in clothing was more refined and expensive. He’d let her have the clothes she wanted but insisted each year as she grew that she get something to make a statement. It was usually a stuffy dress that Jinx hoped collected dust in the back of her closet. 

“Why can’t I just wear a suit like you?” Jinx asked him one day. 

Silco had paused, glanced down at her, and asked, “Do you know how to tie a tie?” 

“No.” Jinx thought it was unfair. Silco told her that she could have one when she learned. She tried to go out to find out how to tie one but after days of searching, she finally just asked him when she saw him putting one on, and he agreed to show her how. 

Jinx stood on a stool in front of the mirror, Silco right behind her as he draped his tie across her shoulders. He reached around her and did the tie up, his voice low in her ear as he explained each step. 

She learned that there was more than one way to tie it and that more complex knots could say different things. When she was able to tie it on her own, Silco agreed to buy her a suit like his. She thought it was easier to move around in than a dress, she didn’t have to worry about running and jumping around in it. 

Unlike with dresses, Silco had a lot to say about suits. From the kind of buttons on her vest to the creases in the fabric, each said something different about her, and Jinx learned why Silco had different suits, even if he dressed in mostly the same one. 

His lessons were on her mind after she secured the chem-baron seat. She needed to establish herself as more than just “The Loose Cannon” if she wanted people to take her seriously. 

Baroness Margot showed a lot of skin but that was because she controlled the sex division in the undercity. Jinx was controlling—well, she wasn’t sure yet, she still had to figure that out, but she knew that exposing her belly to a bunch of figures in power wasn’t exactly a good idea. 

It wasn’t fun to tango with her life anymore since she had someone waiting for her to come home. 

Jinx waited until she could drop Isha off at the Last Drop before she made her way to the tailor that Silco favored. She hadn’t been to the place in a few years but Silco had been loyal to him for a long time. Jinx knew she could trust him when it came to clothing her. 

He was surprised to see her but welcomed her in, shutting his shop down so he could focus his attention on her needs. Jinx did her best to explain what she wanted to present herself as and the man took careful notes. 

“How little do you tailor?” Jinx asked as he was getting her measurements. She first saw him when she was twelve. 

“That depends on what you’re asking,” the man muttered around the pencil in his mouth. 

“You ever done seven-year-olds?” Jinx asked. 

“I would be honored if you chose me to be the first,” he said. “Boy or girl?” 

“Girl.” Isha wasn’t a huge secret. Besides, he’d kept Jinx a secret for so many years, it was part of why Silco liked him. He didn’t have a price to buy information but he knew how to keep his mouth shut. 

“Dresses, suits, or playwear?” He scribbled Jinx’s measurements down, unbothered by the Chompers on her belt staring at his face as he knelt to measure her legs. 

“Dunno yet. Maybe all three.” Jinx loved her outfit, and she’d wear it when she wasn’t trying to be a fancy adult, but if she was going to have to present herself a certain way then Isha would too. “We’ll see how you do with me.” 

“Oh please, Miss Jinx, have I ever let you down before?” he retorted with a huff and Jinx laughed.

Sevika was a little annoyed that Jinx kept dumping Isha on her the next few days, but when Jinx told her that she was getting fitted for clothes, the woman leaned back and regarded her with approval in her gaze and agreed to look after the kid. 

Jinx was trying . She hadn’t thought about Silco so much in a while and it was jarring. She felt like he was right there hovering over her shoulder, mumbling advice in her ear. Suddenly, every time that Jinx pretended to pay attention to his lessons became a distant memory. She didn’t know if she was making up advice or remembering his words washing over her. 

Unlike the rest of the times the voices whispered to her, it was comforting to have Silco there. She didn’t feel so lost and overwhelmed. He was a steady and calming presence, reminding her of the things he taught her. She hadn’t realized how much he was preparing for her to take over for him until she was stepping up into a position of power. 

She had vague memories of Vander trying to prepare Vi to take over. It was so very different from the way that Silco did it. Vander was blunt and piled responsibilities onto Vi to make her learn how to handle them. Jinx could remember the long lectures Vander would give Vi and how if any of them got into trouble, Vi was dragged into it somehow. 

She supposed it made sense that she was supposed to take over for Silco when he was gone, but he never really did anything Vander did with Vi. It's probably because Jinx would have gone off the rails with denial and gotten upset with him. 

The outfit was finished. She kept hearing Silco in her head reminding her about what the suit said about the person wearing it. As Jinx tugged it on in the changing room of the tailor, she looked at herself in the mirror. She’d embraced the red and gold that Silco had worn, making her hair a shockingly bright color that stood out. She wore a deep red button-down shirt with a black suit jacket over it and matching black pants. There was gold piping along the cuffs and collar of the jacket. The tie was a golden color. Jinx pulled the tie around her neck and started to tie it, pausing just after the first fold because she didn’t know what style to do it in. 

She settled on the most basic one, but as she started to tie it, she had to pause because she recognized she was doing it wrong. It was like she had forgotten how. Like she hadn’t spent years straightening Silco’s tie or practicing with her own. 

“Calm down, Jinx,” Silco said gently over her shoulder. “Let’s think things through one step at a time.”

“One step at a time,” Jinx mumbled, undoing the mess she’d started. 

“What do we do first?” Silco coaxed. 

“Wide over narrow,” Jinx whispered. Her fingers moved to do just that. “Then… then wide up through the opening… and down. Wide underneath and to the right…”

“You want the wrong side facing out,” Silco pointed out to her. 

“Right.” Jinx adjusted it. “Wide over narrow to the left, right side facing out. Wide up… and through the hole.” 

Jinx stared at the mirror at the knot she had made. She gripped it and wiggled it to tighten it, her breath coming out shaky. 

“You didn’t forget,” Silco said. Jinx peered over her shoulder in the mirror. Silco stood behind her, his hand raising to settle on her shoulder. “You look perfect.”

Jinx spun around, her heart racing in her chest. She was alone in the changing room. Silco wasn’t there. 

He was dead. She killed him. He should be angry with her. Why wasn’t he taunting her like Mylo or Claggor? 

Jinx turned to look back at the mirror. She truly was alone. She smoothed down the vest before blowing her bangs out of her face. 

“Miss Jinx?” the tailor called out. “Do you need any assistance?” 

“You think I need help dressing up?” Jinx managed to reply, swallowing the lump in her throat. “I’m a big girl!” 

She yanked the curtain open and turned to look at him. He ran an appraising eye over the outfit before reaching out to straighten some spots. 

Jinx felt like she was a little kid playing dress-up, like when she’d clomp around in Vander’s shoes behind the bar and offer straws to the patrons. It didn’t feel like her. 

“A proper fit,” the tailor nodded in approval. “Do you have any addendums?” 

“No.” Jinx was just glad it was done. “Hey buddy, what kinda knot would you recommend?” 

The man perked up. “I see that you have a classic windsor knot. I recommend—” 

Jinx walked back to the bar in her new outfit. The multiple pockets were good for storing items and the belt was thick enough to slot Chompers onto. 

It was dark out by the time her feet kissed the door of the Last Drop. She pushed the door open and slithered through the crowd to ascend the stairs.

With a little oomph, she slammed open the office door. “I’m ba-ack!” 

Isha, who had been lying on her stomach and coloring, popped to her feet in excitement. Sevika, already used to Jinx’s antics, barely even reacted. 

“C’mon, you’re not even gonna compliment my new digs?” Jinx goaded as she grabbed Isha’s hands to spin them in a little circle. 

Sevika indulged her and glanced up. Jinx saw her falter for a moment and she suddenly wondered if the whole thing was a bad idea in the first place. 

“You, uh…” Sevika took a moment to gather the words she wanted. “You look like him.”

“Yeah.” Jinx cleared her throat. “Um, that was kinda the point. His colors and everything.”

Isha yanked on her hands so that she could relay to Jinx that she liked the new outfit. The grin found its way back onto her face. 

“Thanks, kid.” Jinx crouched down to look Isha over. “So. The man who made this for me doesn’t usually do younger customers, but I asked for my favorite person.” She reached out to poke Isha’s belly. “What do you think about getting something fancy too?”

Isha, never wanting to be left out, asked if she could look like Jinx. 

“Probably not exactly like me. But we can definitely match,” Jinx promised. Isha, unbothered by the thought of wearing expensive clothing, just bobbed her head excitedly. Jinx was sure that the fit would come later, either while being measured or actually wearing the clothing. “Were ya good for Sevika?” 

Isha let out a throaty hum at the words, her lips twitching up. She darted away from Jinx to snatch up her art from the ground and scurried back to show it to her. 

“Wowie!” Jinx pulled Isha’s back against her front as she admired the art scribbled on the papers. “What do ya think, Sevika? Does this look just like me?” 

She held up a picture of a figure with two long strands of blue hair and a smiley face. Sevika glanced at it before letting out a small snort at the comparison. 

“Yeah, exactly like you,” Sevika muttered. “It’s a replica.” 

“Hear that, kid?” Jinx asked Isha, pressing their cheeks together. “We’ve got a real artist on our hands!” 

Isha leaned back into her with a little sigh of contentment. Jinx smacked a big kiss on her cheek and Isha grinned at the affection. 

“Alrighty, kid. It’s time to get home, huh?” Jinx straightened up, smoothing down her vest with the movement. She held out her hand and Isha latched on. “Say goodbye to ‘vika.” 

Isha raised a hand to wave at her and after a moment Sevika indulged her. 

“Goodnight, brat,” Sevika said, fondness lacing her words. 

“Bye lefty,” Jinx chirped her own goodbye. 

Sevika rolled her eyes. “Don’t die, I don’t want to deal with the fallout.”

Jinx gave her a sloppy salute before turning on her foot to leave. 

Isha squirmed as she stood on a stool while the tailor circled her like a shark, a measuring tape in his hands and a notebook loosely tucked in his breast pocket. 

He had never been bothered when Jinx squirmed when she was younger. Squirming didn’t seem to matter to him. Jinx was relieved, because if he did get upset with Isha for squirming then there were going to be problems.

“Mm.” Isha hummed to get Jinx’s attention. She asked her when she would be finished. 

“How much longer?” Jinx asked the man. 

“Over halfway done,” the tailor said. Jinx was pretty sure his name was along the lines of Adair. “Arms out, please.” 

Between scribbling numbers, the man turned to glance at Jinx. “Would you say she’s growing fast?”

Jinx blinked at the question. “Um…” It had been half a year since she had Isha and she never thought to measure something like that. She had a vague memory of her mom doing something along those lines. “I dunno.”

“Just need to know how much room to leave to grow,” Adair assured her. “You said she’s seven?”

“Mhm.” Jinx folded her arms. 

“Growth spurts generally happen at age nine,” Adair commented aloud. “You, Miss Jinx, were already shooting up like a weed when we met.” 

“Didn’t shoot up enough,” Jinx laughed. She thought the shimmer might have done something wacky to the malnutrition she suffered as a kid. She swore she grew just a little as it fixed her insides. “So. What d'ya recommend?”

Adair took a few moments to finish scribbling in his notepad before he turned to look at her. “Based on her scraped knees and the paint, I assume she’s more rough and tumble. I’d recommend pants and a top if you’re going for something formal. Shorts for play clothes.”

“Hmm.” Jinx took a moment to think it over. “Isha, do you want a dress or do you want pants?” 

Isha wrinkled her nose and let Jinx know firmly that she’d have to pin her down to get her into a dress. 

Jinx’s lips twitched up in amusement. “Noted.” She turned to Adair. “One formal wear with pants. And, uh… two play clothes.”

Adair inclined his head respectfully. “Of course.”

Isha hopped off the stool when Adair said she could. She asked Jinx if she could look at the fabrics and Jinx shrugged before nodding. Isha marveled over the different fabrics and textures as Adair went to a filing cabinet to rifle through his patterns. 

Jinx glanced over at her kid. Part of the reason why she didn’t want to get involved with the bigwigs was because she didn’t want to thrust Isha into that kind of life. Jinx loved Silco, but she hated that every little thing she did reflected on him. She didn’t want Isha to feel that same kind of pressure. She just wanted her to be a kid. That was the whole reason she was doing it in the first place. 

Isha hadn’t complained yet. She asked a lot of questions about what Jinx was doing and how she suddenly had a full schedule. Jinx was still in her last year of adolescence technically. People don’t like listening to teenagers boss them around. Luckily, Jinx had enough reputation to bully them into line. 

Jinx was still thinking about her first big act to declare herself as chem-baron and take back Silco’s section from Sevika. Sevika wouldn’t protest unless Jinx fucked it up. Sevika was on her side ready to have her back. 

She should do something non-destructive. Something to demonstrate her visions. She needed to build something to give to Zaun to show what she was willing to do, but she just didn’t know yet. 

“I think I have everything I need.” Adair appeared and Jinx did her best not to jump. “You may return in two days time. I should have everything together and ready for a fitting by then.” 

“Right.” Jinx let out a little whistle and Isha’s head snapped to look at her before dropping the fabric she was touching and scurrying to her side. “Until next time.” 

Jinx swiveled side to side in Silco’s office chair. Or maybe it was Sevika’s now. Or hers since she was taking over. It didn’t matter, she’s pretty sure. 

Isha was asleep on her lap, exhausted from the long day with a full belly from Jericho’s. Jinx was just waiting for Sevika so they could talk. 

Sevika barely glanced at her when she entered, removing her cloak and hanging it up before turning to look at her. 

“You’re sitting in my seat,” she said unamusedly. 

“It’s mine now.” Jinx turned to face the woman. “Besides, I got a sleeping kiddy on my lap. If I move, she’ll probably wake up. If that happens, you’re dealing with a cranky kid.” 

Sevika grunted in acknowledgment, instead choosing to sink into an armchair nearby. “What brings you here?” 

Jinx averted her eyes, focusing on the warm weight on her lap. She ran her fingers over the soft thread-bare vest that Isha wore, feeling her little chest rise and fall with each breath. “Well, you’re sometimes good at thinking.” 

“Wow, thanks,” Sevika snorted with an eye roll. “Out with it.” 

“I dunno what to do to make my announcement official,” Jinx admitted. “I know I need to do somethin’ but I dunno what.” 

“Hm.” Sevika regarded her question seriously. “You’re already moving in the right direction with presentation. You see Adair?” 

“Yup.” Jinx had changed out of her suit by then, glad to be back in her usual clothing. “I was thinkin’ I would build something.” 

Sevika leaned back, scratching her chin in thought. “You could mess with the air filters. Or water filters.”

“True.” Jinx twirled a strand of Isha’s blue hair around her finger as she considered it. “I’ll have to actually go take a look at the damage. Might take days if it’s even manageable.”

Sevika shrugged. “Drop the brat off upstairs. Pretty sure the pink-haired punk would be very enthused to know you’re not blowing things up.” Sevika’s tone was dry and sarcastic. 

“Can’t.” Jinx let out a sigh. “Vi told me I can’t keep dropping Isha off whenever.”

Sevika’s attention was fully on her as she sat up straighter. “You didn’t tell me that.” 

“Didn’t I?” Jinx frowned, trying to recall if she complained about it. “Huh.” 

“What did she say?” Sevika demanded, keeping her tone low so she wouldn’t wake up Isha. 

“She and her pet enforcer have their own lives and they’ll be found out at the rate I’m going.” Jinx stared firmly at the top of Isha’s head so she wouldn’t have to see Sevika’s reaction. “I’m pretty stupid, huh?”

“You are, but not about this.” Sevika’s tone was firm. 

“I’m gonna jinx it again.” Jinx pressed her cheek to the top of Isha’s head. “I’ll mess things up like always and then Isha can’t go back.” 

“Fuck them if they do. You don’t need them.” Sevika’s nonchalance grated on Jinx’s nerves. 

“I don’t want that,” Jinx snapped. “I—” She couldn’t think of the right words. Isha was her only way to see Vi. Vi wouldn’t start a fight in front of the kid. Even if it was awkward, Jinx liked being able to see her. She thought things were going okay, so Vi blowing up had taken her off guard. 

Isha hadn’t gone to see them in over a week. She asked only once, and Jinx had to fumble through an explanation of why she couldn’t, and then the girl didn’t ask again. Isha still had the Piltover quality plush rabbit that had been her favorite stuffed toy. She played with it a lot and slept with it at night. Jinx even let her take it out with them. While she wasn’t thrilled that Caitlyn got it for her, she couldn’t be angry about the joy that the stupid thing brought Isha. 

If Jinx messed it all up, Isha would be mad at her. Isha liked Vi and Caitlyn. She liked going to visit and then rambling about all the stupidly expensive things she saw and got to experience. Jinx was already ruining it. 

“I dunno what to do,” Jinx admitted quietly, burying her nose in Isha’s hair. 

Sevika was quiet for a long time. Jinx glanced up at her and watched as the woman tried to string together something to say that wouldn’t set her off or insult her. 

“You should focus on yourself right now,” Sevika finally settled on. “Zaun needs you. If that sister of yours wants you, then she can come find you herself.”

Jinx tethered herself with the smell of Isha. “What if she doesn’t?” she mumbled. “What if she doesn’t come?” 

Sevika finally stretched her hands out helplessly. “I don’t know what you want me to say, kid.” 

Jinx wished Sevika had all the answers. She was blunter than a hammer but had good advice sometimes. 

“It’s alright, lefty,” Jinx sighed. “Let’s circle back to the filters.” 

The air filters were fucked up beyond belief. Jinx, with a respirator sealed to her face, inspected the damage and tried to determine how hard it would be to fix it. It wasn’t like she needed to fix the whole thing, just the section that controlled her part of Zaun. She wouldn’t dare encroach on other’s territories. Besides, if the chem-barons wanted her help then they’d have to owe her. 

It would take a couple of days work to reroute the airflow. She could shoot it up to Piltover, although that would probably make Vi mad at her. Maybe she could reroute it to shoot just outside of Piltover? Either way, she probably needed to do something about it. 

Isha wanted to come with her to fix it. Jinx had to let her down. There was enough nasty air there that even her shimmer struggled with, she wasn’t taking chances with Isha. She settled for leaving Isha with Sevika and a promise that she’d take a whole day off to do whatever Isha wanted, so the girl better make a list. 

That was enough for Isha to let her go. 

Jinx lugged a bag of tools up to the filters before heading off to find the scrap she needed. She had to buy the good quality stuff to make it last long enough that she wouldn’t have to go out every few weeks to fix it. 

“What do ya need all this for?” the merchant inquired when Jinx described what she needed. 

Jinx leaned against the counter. “I’m fixin’ the air filters.” 

The merchant blinked at her. “Are you really?” 

“Mhm. Gotta take care of my people.” Jinx tapped the counter. “Need clean air. So, ya got what I need or not?” 

The merchant sold her the scrap but told her that if she really ended up fixing the air filters with it to come back and she’d get a refund. With multiple trips, Jinx lugged the pieces up through the pipes to the air filter and got to work. 

It was easy to lose track of time when she couldn’t see the sunlight. Jinx hauled pieces around and welded until she was filthy with sweat and grime. Her stomach finally gurgled in protest and Jinx realized that Isha was probably waiting for her to return. 

Jinx scurried off in a hurry, descending the pipes and darting back toward the Last Drop. The sun was just starting to rise, which made Jinx’s gut twist at how long she’d been away. 

Sevika was grumpy in her office. Jinx skidded to a stop inside, freezing when Sevika leveled a glare at her. 

“I lost track of time,” Jinx hurriedly explained. Her eyes fell onto the little girl curled up in Sevika’s cloak on her lap. 

“I’m too old to deal with temper tantrums,” Sevika grunted. “You’re fucking filthy.” 

“I’m sorry.” Jinx wilted. She was just messing everything up lately. 

Sevika sighed before shaking her head. “How far along did you get?” 

“I got the old filters removed. I’ve stuck the new ones in, I’m just redirecting the airflow now.” Jinx hoped that it worked. Weapons were her thing, but she could invent other things, she was pretty sure. 

Sevika nodded. “Go take a shower, you look like you crawled out of a sewer. Then go get something to eat.” 

Jinx glanced at the girl on Sevika’s lap before acquiescing. She showered quickly and shoved down a bunch of food from the bar before returning to the office. She approached Sevika and reached for her kid, carefully taking her as Sevika transferred her off her lap. 

“Isha…” Jinx called out gently, bouncing the girl in her arms. “I came back.” 

Isha stirred at her voice, recognized her arms, and her eyes popped open. She twisted in Jinx’s arms so fast that Jinx nearly dropped her, and she threw her arms around Jinx’s neck. 

“Yeah.” Jinx held Isha close. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to take so long.” 

Isha leaned back so she could sign. Jinx felt guilt twist up in her stomach when Isha said she missed her. 

“I missed ya too, sparkplug,” Jinx said. “Shall we go home?” 

Isha hummed, wrapping her arms around Jinx’s neck again to settle against her. 

Jinx had all the time in the world to be a chem-baron. Isha came first. 

She always would.