Chapter Text
Despite his sect being one of the richest in the cultivational world, Jin Zixuan is not used to drinking wine. In that matter; any type of alcohol at all.
He bottoms his drink and soon after, he feels a reflux he pushes down.
“Ah, this is terrible.”
He looks at the liquid as if he could tell whatever it is he is drinking. He can’t.
Today they are celebrating for winning the war against the wens. This morning they were still battling and weren’t completely sure if it was going to be over today, or they would have to keep fighting until all of them either died or surrender.
Lucky for them, Jiang-guniang’s brother; Wei Wuxian and his army of the dead, played the decisive part and gave them their victory. They emptied all of the liquor they could find in the Scorching Sun Palace. At this point so late at night, everyone around him was either drunk or passed out.
He wished that was his case, so he wouldn’t be able to pity himself anymore about it.
Because Jin Zixuan is an idiot.
Despite all his riches - well, his sect’s riches and influence, but still his, he has lost a one in a million opportunity, not once, but twice! Anyone would have been grateful, anyone wouldn’t have taken it for granted, apparently anyone but him would have treasured it.
“Why did I do that?!” He hits his cup against his forehead.
Jin Zixuan can’t feel any joy, a great relief, yes, there will be no more suffering for any of them or the civilians, but nothing will fix his mistake.
He lost Jiang-guniang’s regard.
He made her cry. A woman of her standing, someone that could have easily stayed back in the protection of her mother’s sect without any harm come her way, still chose to come to take care of their injured and bring them a warm meal. She chose to dirty her hands woth war, after her home had been swallowed by fire and death.
She still chose to help.
Who wouldn’t want a wife as strong as that?
She was brave, she had strength he had failed to see, he had been blinded by his selfishness.
He was an asshole.
The Jin heir covers his eyes in shame.
Who was he to devalue her like that? For a simple bowl of soup! So many years before, when he was a teenager it wasn’t okay, but it made sense to say stupid things at that age, he was angry he would be forced into a marriage without his consent.
And now he was an adult, he had seen war and he had still been fooled with the idea that he was superior, that he had to teach her how things are…just because he had never understood that the marriage pact, wasn’t her fault, she had played no part in it, she had no say in it. Not when it was made, not when it was broken and not now, when she was still good to him without wanting anything in return.
He had projected all his frustration and anger on her.
Just because she was good and cared for him and Jin Zixuan hadn’t seen it.
He hadn’t seen her as a person aside from his parents or the distant future he so much hated.
And Jin Zixuan has stepped and spitted on those feelings, on her prowess, on her kindness, on her strength.
He was no worse than his father with his mother.
He felt his eyes go blurry.
Blinking them away, he tried to distract himself with something.
That’s when he noted a pair of white boots and clothing, belonging to a person sleeping on the floor.
Damn, he thought. Even the Lan felt under the alcohol. It seems everyone was in a festive mood.
He poured himself more liquor and wondered.
Should he offer this guy a drink?
With the tip of his boot he nudged him a bit to see if the man would react. There was no response.
Indeed, too drunk.
Then he drank some more and things started to become more fuzzy, sounds very far away, he lost sense of time and his surroundings as everything became too slow to understand.
He wonders how Jiang-guniang is doing. Is she happy? Is she sleeping? Has she gone to drink with her brothers?
Jin Zixuan doesn’t care for social customs, she can drink with him if she wants too!
But then he remembers, she would probably want to stay very far away from him. Forever.
At some point, he notices he has water on his face, hot, below his eyes.
It must mean he spilled alcohol on his face! and his voice is making an awful sound, is it truly coming from his throat? Ah, he’s an embarrassment. He can’t do anything right.
“Why am I this dumb?” He sobbed, waving his hands around.
And then he felt worse, because he thought Jiang-guniang was an amazing woman and she deserved a good husband! And that was clearly not Jin Zixuan.
He started to visualize in his mind who could be worthy to be her husband.
There were many cultivators…but who was the best?
To sink more in his misery, he started to think based on what he knew about her and what man would be compatible with her. Then, Jin Zixuan, with a lot of anguish because he was none of those things, came to a conclusion.
She needed someone reliable, someone respectable, someone as kind and honest as her, who thought of doing good for others at every chance they got. Someone handsome…
He needs feedback!
Teary eyed, he glanced at his side, noticing again his silent Lan companion didn’t answer.
That is when it came to his mind; there was someone that fit that description among the Lan!
“Oh, naw!”
He realized who Jiang-guniang's husband would be. It was terrible, he couldn’t stand it.
It couldn’t be happening.
His face started getting wet again as he clutched at something he was holding with his arms.
He sobbed and after a moment, he said it out loud, “Jiang-guniang is going to marry Lan-er-Gongzi!”
Now Jin Zixuan was devastated, Hanguang-jun was everything he wasn’t, he was even more handsome!
And he would have to go to their wedding! Or maybe they wouldn’t invite him? That was worse!
And Jiang-guniang would look very beautiful in red and then she would dress with the Lan colors and she would also look good!
The body next to him suddenly rose from their slumber.
“No.”
Jin Zixuan screamed as he hugged the jar of wine he had found at some point during his last drink, when he was still coherent. Ah, so that was what he had been holding…He thinks.
“Naw? Naw why?” He asked, in very much need of an answer.
Hanguang-jun was rejecting Jiang-guniang?!
He did that mistake twice! No one else should do it, everyone needed to understand who she was and the power she held so they wouldn’t regret their life like Jin Zixuan was doing now.
His companion sit down with his two legs facing very different directions, from the light of the fire he could see his white robes had acquired green tint from having been sleeping on the grass until now, his forehead ribbon was eskew and his hair was the color of ink, it shined under the warm orange in an ethereal way, his face seemed almost made of jade with a cold-
“H’nguonjun?!” He screamed again now in shock.
Hanguang-jun blinked at him.
This was the man Jiang-guniang was going to marry! He couldn’t compete against him!
“No!” Said the man, very firmly.
Jin Zixuan was very surprised, and was trying to get closer, but the floor started to move so he decided to stay put on his seat.
Meanwhile, Hanguang-jun was trying very hard to put his leg next to his other one. It was a very hard job, but Jin Zixuan knew he would do it, he was an incredible cultivator.
Not like him.
Jin Zixuan sighed.
The battle for Jiang-guniang’s heart never existed, Hanguang-jun had already won it with his many skills.
Resigned to his fate of dying alone in love with Jiang-guniang and never be worthy of looking at her eyes ever again, Jin Zixuan tried to put a hand on his uncommon companion’s shoulder. After a few missed attempts he managed to land his hand on Hanguang-jun’s strong shoulder.
“H’nguonjun…you’rshe a vershy lucky man. Shiang-guniag will be happy as yoursh wife…”
His hand burned, as if someone had hit it, he quickly took it away.
Did he place his hand on the bonfire instead of Hanguang-jun’s shoulder?!
“Nawwww fire!” He tries to touch it with his other hand and finds that there is no injury.
While he worries, he doesn’t realize he has accidentally dropped his jar. Lan Wangji is the one that grabs it, and hides it away.
He lets go a sigh of relief finally seeing that there is no burnt skin, however…if he had been injured he could have gone ask for Jiang-guniang’s help and have an excuse to talk to her-
No! He deserves to suffer, he can’t talk to her, he has wronged her very deeply!
He can’t keep thinking very deeply about this, because someone is grabbing him by the arm, almost squeezing it to the bone.
Jin Zixuan couldn’t move from the pain, he regrets it! He won’t talk to Jiang-guniang, he understands, she is going to marry Hanguang-jun.
“No! I want to marry Wei Ying! Not Jiang-guniang!”
Jin Zixuan blinked and then he felt a lot of anger.
How could he?! How dare he?!
“I want Wei Ying!” Lan Wangji responded with no shame at all.
“You would scheat on hersh…?!”
Who would have thought Hanguang-jun would do something as indecorous as this?!
He wanted to cheat on her with her own brother?!
Jin Zixuan tries to stand, but the grip stopping him is very hard.
“How darshe y’u…!”
He was going to continue screaming at his former fiancé’s new asshole fiancé but the world started to shake…quite literally.
The strange thing is that Lan Wangji was holding him by his two arms, but everything around him was moving too much.
Feeling the alcohol coming back on his throat, he coughed and then fell backwards.
When he looked up, there was a man watching him with intense eyes and a mouth wide open.
Then he remembered this was Hanguang-jun and he got angry again.
“Y’u…bad…vershy bad!” He pointed his finger at the man from the floor.
The man gasped at him as if he had been discovered hiding a secret.
Right after, Lan Wangji disappears from his sight in a flush of white and quick footsteps.
“Need to find Wei Ying…cannot drink alcohol. Prohibited.”
Jin Zixuan heard him whisper as his eyelids started to get heavy, very heavy…
Maybe he needs to take a nap. Just for a short while. Then he would continue to fight for Jiang-guniang’s honor.
“Yesh, fight…”
The world is a bit upside down now, a nap is just what he needs.
For some reason, the last thing Jin Zixuan saw that day was Lan Wangji pouring out all the jars of liquor on the floor, as if to make sure no one would drink from it ever again.
And also…he might have seen Lan Xichen with only one layer of clothes?