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There’s a teddy in Soap’s bed; a beaten-up, old brown bear. Well-loved, if the state of the fur is any indication. Ghost lets out a choked laugh, mostly at his own expense. He wishes he was there, suddenly, wishes he was by Johnny’s side as he walked through the doorway and realised that his childhood room was waiting for him like a time capsule. Wishes he got to see the embarrassed scrunch of his face, the way the tips of his ears would flush red.
Soap has a whole second life, outside of the SAS. He’s got a mother, and a poorly-decorated bedroom, and a bear. All Ghost has is a flat that will be the same it is today as it will be the day he dies, like he was never even here at all.
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Bookmark Notes:
Ghost and Soap have an unspoken bond with each other- the rest of 141 knows they’re a unit on and off the field, but Ghost and Soap don’t put into words what they mean to each other, and don’t act on it.
Soap invites Ghost to spend Christmas with his family but Ghost declines- he still firmly believes that if he grasps for good things then he’ll ruin them. Soap sends him a picture of his childhood bedroom, and the image of Soap’s life outside the SAS reminds Simon of how little he has. He returns early from leave and asks his doctor to add a DNR note to his file.
Soap finds out about the DNR and they have a fight- Soap is furious that Simon thinks they could just replace him if he died, asks Simon how he’d feel if Soap died when he could’ve been saved because he had a DNR. Simon pushes him away and Soap gives him the silent treatment. Simon figures this is just him inevitably losing another good thing and asks Price to put him in a different group than Soap on missions.
Unfortunately the next mission goes south- Soap’s group has to split off from the rest of them, and the building they’re in blows up before Ghost can arrive with backup. Ghost feels soul-tearing agony, even when Soap is pulled alive from the wreckage. Ghost promises himself that he’ll never leave Soap again, if Soap will just live through this.
Soap was badly injured and is in a coma. He had a brain bleed, a mangled leg, and hearing loss. Ghost camps out in Soap’s hospital room, even when Price and Gaz are called back to duty he refuses to leave. Soap’s family finally arrives (it took them a couple days to get from Glasgow to the hospital) and Ghost is apprehensive but Soap’s mother is welcoming and treats Simon like a friend she already loves. Soap has been sharing anecdotes of Ghost over the years, so she knows how important Ghost is to him.When Soap finally wakes up he’s very disoriented and has aphasia, not recognizing ghost or his family. Ghost is grateful he woke up at all, but depressed to not be recognized. Thankfully after a week or so Soap is more coherent and remembers them. Unfortunately, he’s awake enough to be told the extent of his injuries and that he won’t be returning to service. Soap has lost his fine motor control and the strength in his legs- while he’ll regain much of it through PT, he’ll never be combat-ready again.
Soap is devastated and tries to push Ghost away by being nasty, but Ghost knows what he’s doing and the pain of thinking Soap dead is still fresh, so he’s able to brush off the barbs and stay close. Soap eventually realizes that Ghost won’t be dissuaded and opens up instead of being prickly. Ghost assures Soap he’s staying for good. The only thing ghost had besides the SAS was Soap, and Soap is much more important to him.
As they’re leaving the hospital to transport Soap to the PT rehabilitation facility closer to home, they finally kiss. Soap will have to live in the facility for the first few months, but Ghost is determined to visit and be involved AMAP. There’s an old rundown house owned by Soap’s family nearby that Soap’s mother gives to them. While Soap is doing PT, Ghost is fixing up the house. He gets it livable in time for Soap to leave the facility, and they put the finishing touches on it together.
There’s still rough patches as Soap leans to cope with his limitations and they learn how to be together, but their relationship has a rock-solid foundation of devotion, so they always come back together after every argument.
The ending is very sweet and sappy and delightful. They might miss being soldiers, but not as much as they love having each other. -
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