Chapter Text
Lieutenant Reed glared at his phone, checking the time. Displayed in the bright white font, he was able to read it - 13:06 October 7th, 2040 . He let out a long, tired sigh before he finished his cigarette. Glancing back at the public crime scene behind him, he watched as the forensic team was beginning to wrap things up.
His eyes followed a familiar black and white jacket that intruded on his investigation. He glared at the blue triangle as the machine knelt by the freshly murdered, but not identified, corpse lying on the sidewalk. It dipped its finger into the victim’s blood puddle. Gavin glanced over with disgust as the RK900 lifted its hand, licking the sample. “Get that plastic dipshit off my crime scene,” Gavin barked as he rushed back into the crime scene. He attempted to grab the android, but his arms were quickly intercepted by his coworker. “...the fuck is your problem, detective?”
“Lieutenant,” Tina said in a shockingly formal tone as she signaled him to back away from her android. Detective Chen hadn’t talked to Gavin much since his last angry outburst. She slowly released Gavin’s arms as she dropped her ‘professional’ act. “I was told to bring Isaac here - to ensure there was no deviant involvement. I’m sorry if that upsets you, Gavin, but sometimes we’re going to be working together.”
Gavin scowled at the plastic prick as it paid him no mind. Isaac was far more focused on his task than Gavin’s old RK900 was. Unlike Niles or David, Isaac wasn’t defective. Neither of the police department’s new RK900s were defective. Isaac and Brett, the new RK900s, were not talkative towards Lieutenant Reed. They did their job, but actively avoided Gavin. They were more than aware of how he felt about the shitty plastic detectives.
Tina placed her hands in her pockets. “I, uh, texted you this morning. Did you see my text?”
“No,” Gavin lied. He had already seen her ‘happy birthday’ text. It wasn’t something he was looking forward to. Being thirty-eight, Gavin felt far too old to be celebrating something as juvenile as his birthday.
“Happy birthday,” Tina whispered as she carefully supervised her android partner. “I was hoping you’d swing by my apartment tonight. I texted you to try to come over around seven.”
“Why?” Gavin sneered. “...so you can throw me a surprise birthday party? How many times do I have to tell you that I’m too old to celebrate birthdays?”
“You’re never too old to celebrate your birthday,” Tina muttered dismissively. “Look, I wanted to apologize for last week.” She glared at Gavin as he refused to apologize back. He didn’t even say a word. “Look, don’t tell anyone, but I got you something. I was thinking a lot about what happened at the beginning of the year and-”
“Why the hell would you get me anything?” Gavin snarled with disapproval. “What did you get me, Tina?”
“It’s a surprise,” Tina hissed, refusing to reveal her intentions. “I notice how lonely you’ve been since Niles died and-”
“Nines didn’t die, it got deactivated,” Gavin grunted as he folded his arms. His jaw clenched as he suppressed the urge to knock Isaac over. Just seeing the word ‘RK900’ printed on the android’s back was enough to send him into a subdued rage.
“Right…” Tina let out a resigned sigh. “Look, Gavin. Please come over tonight. I think you’ll like what I got you.”
“Fine, but don’t expect me to linger around all night.” Gavin took a few steps back from the yellow holographic tape. Taking another cigarette from his jacket he lit himself another cigarette. If Niles was still around, the damn android would be harassing him about losing eleven minutes of his life. Taking another drag, Gavin looked back at Tina. “...is Vivian going to be there?”
“No,” Tina sighed. “She’s still pissed I won’t move to Milford. I told her - I just got promoted and I don’t want to start over but… I don’t know. She expects me to throw everything away and move to Milford.”
“What a bitch,” Gavin grumbled. “I don’t get why you keep crawling back to her.”
“She’s not a bitch. She’s just…difficult,” Tina said softly. “You know - you have a lot in common with Vivian. I don’t get why you two hate each other so much.”
Suddenly, Isaac stood up. The android approached the police lieutenant and detective. The android remained stoic and silent, seeming to avoid interrupting or eavesdropping on their private conversation. Its eyes avoided Lieutenant Reed, remaining focused on Detective Chen.
“Tina, it looks like your toaster wants you.” Gavin glared at the RK900. “What do you want, plastic prick?”
Isaac hesitated, waiting for Tina to get it the nod of approval to speak. “I have come to the conclusion that no androids were involved in this homicide. There is no evidence to suggest android involvement.”
Gavin rolled his eyes. “Hey, dipshit, I could’ve told you that without putting evidence in my mouth.”
The rigid machine did not respond as it stood in place. Gavin suppressed the urge to treat the android like an ashtray.
“Sorry,” Tina whispered as she stood close to her stiff android. “I, uh… I’ll see you tonight, right?”
“Yeah…” Gavin grunted back.
Lieutenant Reed watched as Detective Chen and her plastic pet left the area. There was no reason for the android to be around his crime scene to begin with. Yet, it was never up to Gavin. He let out a sigh as he walked across the street to approach his Mazda Miata. After opening the driver’s door, he took a seat. His eyes skirted over to the passenger seat, noticing the black and white jacket that he had hung over the seat.
What would Nines say if he was still around?
Gavin already knew he would’ve had to listen to three lectures, one for every cigarette he lit. Worse yet, he knew the android would refuse to remain in the car. Niles would be glued to his side. The android would be trying to…hold his hand or try to secure a kiss.
“Fuck…” Gavin grunted as he tried to block out his fond memories of the android. It was better to hate Niles. Otherwise, Gavin would have to dwell on the lack of his presence. Yet, he kept the android’s jacket close, as if it were a safety blanket. No matter how many times Gavin tried to assert his hatred for the RK900 - he knew it was never true. His bed felt empty without his companion’s company.
His time dwelling was cut short as he remembered there was another homicide in downtown Detroit. Letting out a sigh, he pressed his Miata’s push to start. He didn’t have time to waste on grieving. He had a job to do.
Gavin knew what he was getting into. He went through this every year with Tina. As he slowly lifted his hand to knock on her apartment door, he could already tell he would be bombarded with confetti and an annoying crowd shouting “Happy Birthday” despite the fact he wasn’t a young kid. His knuckles brushed against the door, gently knocking as he prepared himself for the incoming headache.
“Coming!” Tina’s voice shouted from the other side.
For a moment, everything was silent until the door creaked open. Sumo layed on the carpet, resting his head as he let out gentle, but loud snores. Surprisingly, the only other ‘person’ in the living room with Tina was her stiff plastic prick wearing a corny birthday hat while holding a pink balloon that said: “ It’s a girl ”. Tina glanced back at the balloon as she noticed Gavin staring at it and she began to laugh awkwardly.
“I’m sorry - it was the only balloon I could find at Walmart.” Tina crossed her arms as Gavin slowly entered the apartment. “I…uh… I had a feeling you wouldn’t want anyone to see your birthday gift. I mean, I don’t think I’d want anyone to see this either. It’ll be something just between the two of us.” She shrugged. “...besides, you hate surprise birthday parties so, for once I actually listened.”
Gavin gave her a skeptical look. His friend was acting too out of character for comfort. “Tina, did you get me a dildo? What the hell is going on? Why is that thing here?”
Tina forced a smile, as if she knew her next move would piss off Gavin. “I didn’t want to leave him at the police station. Don’t worry - Isaac won’t judge. He doesn’t do anything outside of work. He’s not like-”
“What did you get me?” Gavin snarled as he glared at the RK900. He grew impatient as she kept evading the question. Tina was more than aware that Gavin didn’t like surprises.
Slowly, Tina walked over to her right, opening the closet door behind the couch. Gavin scowled as Tina opened the door to reveal an android in a white uniform labeled ‘SB200’. Detective Chen grabbed the android’s hand, leading it towards Lieutenant Reed. Gavin was not impressed by the skinny android or its brown eyes.
“...the fuck is this?” Gavin hissed.
“It’s an SB200,” Tina announced as she raised her hands as if she were doing a grand reveal. “It’s, uh, an intimate android. I found one on sale after CyberLife announced they’re discontinuing them for the new SB300s. I…I…I felt bad about everything that happened with Niles and-”
“Shut up,” Gavin growled as he gestured towards Isaac. “Don’t bring up Nines in front of this prick.”
“He already knows,” Tina whispered with shame. She was never good at keeping secrets. “Look, Gavin - I see how lonely you are. I was thinking that this would cheer you up.”
“I can’t believe you told that fucking… What the fuck, Tina? You really thought an android would cheer me up?” Gavin scoffed with disapproval. “Tina, you know damn well how much I hate these things. Why the fuck would I ever want one?”
“You loved Niles,” Tina protested as she crossed her arms.
“That’s completely fucking different!” Gavin shouted at her. “For fuck’s sake, Tina…”
Tina sighed. She rolled her eyes before speaking as if she was already annoyed by what she was about to say. “Gavin, this thing apparently knows over sixty-nine different sexual positions and is programmed to be kink-friendly. Even if you don’t ‘love’ him, you can still… You know… I, uh… I even bought a compatible android pussy if you, uh, get bored of him having a dick.”
“How much did you fucking spend?” Gavin whispered as if anyone important was around to hear their conversation.
Why the hell would Tina buy Gavin a sex android? What type of degenerate did she think he was? He glared at the SB200 with disgust as the mindless android remained idle during their entire interaction. He wasn’t sure which android he wanted to punch more - the sex android or the RK900 bitch standing beside Tina.
Tina looked away from Gavin for a moment. There was shame written all over her face. “...more than I’d like to admit.”
“...the fuck were you thinking?” Gavin snarled at her. “Fucking - I don’t want one of these things! I’d rather burn it.”
“Gavin, please,” Tina tried to reason with him. “Look, I just wanted you to have someone at home. I know it’s lonely without Niles and… I’m guessing Cleo never came home either. I-”
“Fuck off,” Gavin grunted as he ignored her attempts to keep him at the apartment. He couldn’t stand it. His best friend thought she could fix all his problems by purchasing an overly complicated sex doll. The idea disgusted Reed as he rushed for the apartment door. He slipped out of the apartment without any further speaking as he stomped his feet down the hallway. This was a total waste of his time.
Suddenly, his head turned as he heard the apartment door creak open again. Gavin glared at the stiff RK900 as it approached him, still holding the pink gender reveal balloon. Isaac walked up to Gavin, remaining stoic and emotionless. “Lieutenant Reed, I would like to speak to you.”
“Fuck off,” Gavin hissed as he glared at the android. He ripped out his gun, pressing it against the android’s head. He wanted to pull the trigger so badly - but this was not the location to do so. Instead, he released a fake, but amused “pow” before lowering his weapon. “...the fuck do you want, dipshit?” His grin quickly faded as the RK900 persisted. What the hell was wrong with it now?
“With all due respect, Lieutenant Reed, I believe you should go back and accept Detective Chen’s gift.” The RK900 began as Gavin glared at the machine. Why the hell was it telling him what to do? “Detective Chen was trying to be thoughtful, as she is aware of how lonely you have been since your RK900-”
“Don’t you dare talk about Nines,” Gavin snarled as he pushed the stiff prick away from him.
“I am sorry, I did not realize the topic was offensive,” Isaac didn’t know when to shut the fuck up. Its blue eyes remained focused on Gavin. “Lieutenant Reed, I would like you to understand - you are not the only person going through rough times.”
“...the fuck do you know about ‘rough times’?” Gavin sneered as he mocked the android’s words.
“Detective Chen has her own problems right now,” Isaac whispered quietly. “She is very stressed out and thought that she would be helping you by purchasing the android. She had nothing but good intentions. I understand that you hate androids, Lieutenant Reed. I am merely asking you to accept the gift and take it home. Once it leaves her apartment, it doesn’t matter what you do with the SB200.” The RK900 glanced back as if it was worried Tina would step out of the apartment. Its attention slowly came back to Gavin. “Please, Detective Chen is very overwhelmed to begin with. This week has been very rough on her.”
Gavin glared at the android skeptically. “Why do you care?”
“...because it interferes with her ability to properly perform her job,” the android answered coldly. Of course, the machine didn’t actually care about Tina. It was too busy thinking about its investigations. “Lieutenant Reed, please consider how much Detective Chen has spent to purchase the SB200. Again, you can do whatever you like with the android once you remove it from her sight. However, for Detective Chen’s sake, I would highly suggest that you take her gift and thank her.”
Gavin rolled his eyes. This was the most he had ever heard Isaac speak. He couldn’t believe this stiff asshole had the same face as Niles did. He wasn’t going to take orders from a fucking android. “Listen here, tin can,” Gavin hissed at the machine. “I hate androids. I especially fucking hate you. Why the fuck would I ever listen to you?”
Isaac was silent for a moment as its LED circled yellow. The android was thinking about something intensely as its eyes skirted away from Lieutenant Reed. “Niles was never properly registered under the name ‘Niles’, correct?” The android asked quietly as it stood close to the police lieutenant. “I see no RK900s registered under the name ‘Niles’ on file, active or deactivated.”
Crossing his arms, Gavin refused to fall for the RK900’s manipulative tricks. “What the hell is your point? The android is gone. It got deactivated. If you keep talking about him, I’m going to drag your ass out to the nearest dumpster and burn you. You know, uh, androids don’t fare too well against fire.”
The emotionless RK900 was unbothered by Gavin’s threat. “Did you witness your android’s deactivation?”
“N-No,” Gavin hissed as he folded his arms. If he wasn’t in a narrow apartment complex hallway, he would have shot the plastic bastard already. “It fucking ran off to CyberLife while I was in the hospital. I already confirmed it with my brother. Fucker works at CyberLife - he oversaw the android’s deactivation.” He let out a sigh. Why was he telling this to Tina’s plastic pet?
“Do you know what name your RK900 was originally registered under?” Isaac kept pushing.
“What the fuck is your point?” Gavin snapped. “I told you to stop fucking talking about him.”
“...because my records only show one RK900 has been deactivated and it was not an RK900 from Detroit,” Isaac told Gavin. There was no way the plastic prick was being honest. Gavin had called Ethan - his asshole brother told him it was far too late to save Nines.
Gavin glared at Isaac. “Nines’s original name was Connor,” he confessed.
Isaac hesitated as its LED circled again. “There are ten RK900s registered under the name ‘Connor’ - two missing, one deactivated. Do you happen to know your android’s serial code number?”
Gavin paused as he glared at Isaac. What the fuck did it mean by ‘missing’? Clearly - Nines was the android that was deactivated. Yet, the police lieutenant found himself falling into the RK900’s trap. Was it possible Niles was simply ‘missing’? Did the bastard run off without him? No, Niles wouldn’t do that. Right? Has Gavin been grieving the damn android for no reason? His curiosity was killing him.
“I, uh… I have its jacket in my car,” Gavin admitted reluctantly. “I’m pretty sure Nines’s serial code was printed on the jacket.”
“Lieutenant Reed, if I run your RK900’s serial code - will you please accept Detective Chen’s birthday present?” There it was. The RK900’s trap. This was nothing more than a manipulative trick of Isaac’s as it preyed on Gavin’s loneliness. Yet, Gavin felt unable to say no.
“...fine,” Gavin hissed begrudgingly.
Lieutenant Reed pushed past the RK900, returning to the door of Tina’s apartment. He lifted his hand, letting out a defeated sigh as Isaac stood closely behind him. Slowly, Gavin knocked on the door. Tina opened the door with a conflicted and forced smile.
“I, uh… I’m sorry,” Gavin muttered as he followed Tina back inside her apartment. “I overreacted.” He glanced over at the android. He wasn’t going to bother telling Tina he would probably burn the machine once he left. “What’s its name?” He asked, pretending to actually care.
“Oh, that’s the neat part,” Tina’s chipper mood finally returned to her as she gestured towards the android. “It has no name. You can register it now. Just say, ‘SB200, register your name’...”
Gavin chuckled to himself. “Alright… SB200, register your name - Dickhead.”
“My name is Dickhead,” the SB200 responded.
“No!” Tina glared at Gavin. “Hey, take it seriously. Don’t name him something so disrespectful.” She raised her voice. “Hey, Dickhead, reregister your name - John.”
“My name is now John,” the SB200 replied.
“I don’t like that name,” Gavin smirked with amusement. “John, reregister your name - Cum Slut.”
The SB200 unsurprisingly approved of the name. “My name is now Cum Slut.”
“Really, Gavin?” Tina tried to hide the fact that she found the android’s new name funny. “Fine, fine… You want to name him something funny? I have an idea. Hey, Cum Slut, reregister your name - Denny’s Grand Slamwich.”
In a robotic tone, the SB200 confirmed its new name. “My name is now Denny’s Grand Slamwich.”
Gavin turned towards Tina. “...’slamwich’?”
“You know…” Tina shrugged. “It’s the breakfast special.”
“It’s called a ‘grand slam’,” Gavin corrected her. “...I” He glared at the SB200. “I’m not fucking calling this thing ‘Denny’s Grand Slamwich’. That’s a fucking mouthful.”
“What are you going to name him?” Tina asked. Her smile slowly faded. “...you’re going to rename him dickhead, aren’t you?”
“No, I have a better one.” Gavin crossed his arms as he grinned at the android. “Hey, Denny’s Grand….Slamwich, reregister your name - Asshole.”
The SB200 smiled at Gavin. “My name is now Asshole.”