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Whose Baby is He Anyway?

Summary:

Marlene McKinnon keeps calling Regulus "Baby Black" - which he absolutely despises. At a party he declares there in only ONE person who gets to call him "Baby."
James, who sleeps with Regulus whenever he lets him and might just be in love with him, decides he has to find out who gets to call his lover "Baby" - does he have competition he needs to know about? Or is it just one of Reggie's obnoxious friends?

Notes:

Hot Take of the Story: Regulus drops his Ts when he's drunk.
Hot Take Number 2: James calls Regulus "Twinkle Star" sometimes. Not in this story so often, but in general. Regulus hates it.

(See the end of the work for more notes.)

Work Text:

Regulus can say he hates Gryffindor parties as much as he wants, but it evidently doesn’t stop him from showing up for every single one. He brings his friends sometimes and although they spread through the entire castle how “lame” their parties are, they seem to have a good time.

It’s Saturday. The music is good. The bodies are warm with booze. Regulus is sitting on the couch, info-ranting about something. He is hot when he is info-ranting, especially when drunk. James and Sirius are sitting on the ground in front of the couch. James hasn’t taken his eyes off Regulus for about thirty minutes now. He is afraid to even blink in case he misses a particularly beautiful angle.

Marlene is sitting on the couch next to him, getting into his face.

“Come on, Baby Black,” she exclaims when Regulus ends his info-rant by taking a large sip from his drink. “Admit it: Our parties are better than yours!”

“Your parties are rubbish! And s’op calling me Baby Black.”

“Oh, Baby Black, Baby Black, Baby Black! You’re so cute, Baby.”

Regulus pushes his finger into her shoulder. “There is only one – one – person who is allowed’o call me Baby, and i’s not you,” he slurs.

Sirius sits up at that. “What? Who’s allowed to call you Baby?”

“No’ you.”

“Oh my god, do you have a lover? You have a lover who calls you baby? Oh, that’s so cute – I want to throw up.”

“Fuck off.”

“My brother has a lover. Brother has a lover. Brother has a lover!”

“Shu’ up, Sirius!” Regulus kicks against his shoulder. “Idiot.”

“Brother has a lover. Brother has a lover. Brother has a lover. Brother has a lover. Brother has a lover!”

Regulus kicks against his head.

“Ow! Fucking arsehole!”

“Shu’up, you’re jus’ jealous because you can’t pull anyone and no one wan’s’o fuck you and no one will ever call you baby.”

“Pfft, I don’t want anyone to call me baby.”

“Yeah? Why are you acting like one all the time then?”

“You’re an arsehole when you drink.”

“I’m always an arsehole. And the one who calls me baby loves it.”

“Who is it?” Sirius pokes Regulus’ leg repeatedly. “Reggie. Reggie. Reggie. Reggie. Reggie. Reggie. Reggie. Reggie.”

“Fuck off!”

“Reggie. Reggie. Reggie. Who is it? Tell me! Tell me. Tell me. Tell me. Tell me. Tell me.”

Regulus claps his hands. “I. will. Staple. Your. Mouth. Shut.”

“Who is allowed to call you baby? Do’ya have a girlfriend?”

“Fuck off. I do no’ have a girlfriend.”

Sirius gasps. “Do you have a friends with benefits? Oh, Reggie, you slut.”

“Says the righ’ one! How many people in this room have you fucked?”

Sirius casts a look through the room, lingering on some people. Regulus grins.

“See? And all that while you’re pining after the one person you will never get’o fuck. And he will never call you Baby.”

They both look at Remus across the room.

“I bet he will-“

“I bet he won’t!”

“Well, maybe I don’t want him to call me Baby. It’s so American anyway. … I want him to moan my name around my cock.”

“Ugh.” Regulus kicks his brother again. “You’re disgusting!”

Marlene sprawls herself out on the couch and laughs. “You’re both disgusting. Baby Black.”

Regulus grabs a pillow and smacks Marlene in the face with it. “Fuck off. This is why your parties suck. I’ll go back to my common room, and I’ll take my friends and you can stay at your lame-ass party.”

He pushes himself up from the couch. He quickly locks eyes with James, who has been listening very attentively. Regulus smirks at him before walking over to Barty, who is spinning Pandora around at the moment.

He quickly says something close to their ear. Barty’s hand rests against the small of Regulus’ back. James doesn’t like how his hand looks on Regulus. He doesn’t want anyone to touch his precious star.

He squints at Regulus and his friends leaving the party.

“Who gets to call him Baby?” James slurs, but neither Sirius nor Marlene are listening anymore.

***

James just can’t shake the question.

Someone in Regulus’ life gets to call him Baby and he will figure out who it is.

James and Regulus have… a thing. He doesn’t know what it is, he just knows he never wants it to end. He also knows that he would be terribly hurt if Regulus had things with other men. They don’t have rules. Reggie is free to fuck whomever he wants. James just doesn’t want him to.

James calls Regulus many things: Reggie, Love, Black, Twinkle Star, Leopold (because he’s named after a star in the Leo constellation. Regulus genuinely despises that one) – he even calls him Vampire whenever Regulus gets carried away and bites and sucks on his neck and his shoulder. He can’t recall ever calling him Baby – and he is quite sure Regulus wouldn’t let him do it if he tried.

“Sirius,” James asks during breakfast, his eyes on the Slytherin table, “Who do you think calls him Baby?”

Sirius looks up confused. His hair is up in a messy bun with his wand stuck into it. He is wearing sunglasses although they are inside.

“Who calls whom what?”

“Yesterday, Marls annoyed Regulus by calling him Baby Black and he said only one person gets to call him Baby. Who?”

Sirius lulls his head to the side. For a moment, James thinks he fell asleep again.

“Right, right, I remember. I don’t know, man. Guess, Regulus has a girlfriend. But if you’re asking me who on earth would ever want to date this bad imitation of Edgar Allen Poe, I can’t tell you.”

“Baby?” Remus asks. Sirius looks up. “I can’t imagine Regulus letting anyone call him that. Like, ever.”

Sirius slowly turns his attention back to his breakfast with red cheeks.

“Well, I shall have to find out. Sorry, boys, I will have to spend the entire day with Regulus to find out who calls him that.”

“What? I thought we’re being hungover together,” Sirius complains.

“Remus will keep you company. Won’t you, Moony?”

Remus glances at Sirius for a second too long before saying, “Yeah, of course. I’ll do your nails and braid your hair or whatever James usually does.”

“Exactly that, yeah,” James nods.

 

Right after breakfast, James gets out the Marauder’s Map and locates Regulus in the library.

He sits at the far back, staring at a page in a textbook. His back curls are just slightly tousled from Regulus running his piano-player fingers through them. He looks positively breathtaking, even when hungover.

James lowers himself into the chair next to him. “Hey, Love.”

“James, I’ve told you repeatedly to keep your hyper arse away from me after parties. It’s infuriating how well you’re doing.”

James grins. “I don’t feel like staying away from you today. I, in fact, want to spend every minute of today with you.”

Regulus looks up. He balances his head in his hand. “Don’t you have to babysit my brother?”

“Moony’s taking care of him.”

“Ah, bet by the end of today they either make out or Sirius hides in the girls’ dorm for three days again.”

“I take girls’ dorm.”

“Okay, snogging it is. Name your price.”

“Midnight date in the forest. What do you want?”

Regulus smirks and leans into him. “If I win, you take me up to the Astronomy tower and fuck me under the stars. And do that nice thing with your tongue.”

James can feel his entire body grow hot. Regulus wears a satisfied smile when he pulls back and turns to his textbook.

James clears his throat. “Deal. What are you doing there, anyway?”

“I’m trying to finish my homework so I can crawl back into my bed where I belong.”

“Alright, I’ll help you.” James offers and scoots closer to him until their thighs are touching.

Regulus’ friends join them one by one. James quickly realises that they all have a variety of nicknames for Regulus. He pays attention to each of them.

Pandora comes first. She is Regulus’ sweetest and best friend – best as in, James thinks she is the best one Regulus has.

“Hey, Redg,” she says when she sits down. Redg is probably short for Reggie, how Sirius always calls his brother. “Still sitting on Divination? Oh, hi James.”

“Morning, Pandora.”

Regulus sighs. “I should have finished this shit yesterday. I just didn’t want to.”

“Yes, because you rather left me to fuck someone whose name we shall not name right now.” – that someone was James. As long as Regulus didn’t fuck anyone beside him yesterday, that is.

“Shut up, Panda,” Regulus kicks her under the table.

“Reggie,” Pandora complains.

“Be quiet if you don’t want to be kicked.”

Barty and Evan arrive then. “Ha,” Evan exclaims, “That’s victim blaming, Reg. That’s so toxic of you.” – he calls him Reg as in Regulus.

Pandora clicks her tongue. “I thought your parents taught you manners, Redg.”

“No, only taught me forbidden curses.”

“And trauma dumping,” Evan says, “We’re on a roll today. Do it more.”

“You’re annoying. Never speak to Lily and Mary ever again.”

“Sexism,” Evan exclaims like Regulus just performed a trick. “Amazing. One more, Reggie, come on.” – Evan pronounces it Reg-gie, from his version of Reg. It sounds weird to James.

Regulus turns to James. “This is your fault. You and your stupid parties and stupid friends. This is what I have to deal with every time he talks to those girls.”

“That’s racist.”

“Literally, how?”

“Well, you said those girls. And Mary is black and Lily is a ginger – pretty sure that’s a race, too. I’m so woke.” 

“I will kill you.”

Evan just grins. “Hey, do you think I should become vegan? Like, I totally see myself shaming people at the dinner table but I’ll miss fried eggs.”

Barty nods thoughtfully. “I think, if you want to be truly woke and piss off your parents to the max, you should give up on the eggs. A small sacrifice by contrast.” He leans over the table to Regulus. “What are you doing, hot stuff?”

James doesn’t like Barty. He always gets the feeling that Barty fancies Regulus. The fact that they used to have a fling doesn’t help. If it was Barty who was allowed to call Regulus Baby, it would be the absolute worst-case scenario. What would that even mean? Is Regulus into Barty after all? Is something going on between them? Is Regulus fucking Barty?

“I’m trying to do my Homework,” Regulus mutters. “Can’t you go away? All of you.”

“We were bored in the dorm,” Barty complains, “Evan didn’t want to suck my cock.”

“It’s not so simple, Barty,” Evan says, “We must ask ourselves why we are doing this. Are we just fetishizing gay people? Am I taking advantage of you as my queer friend by exploring things with you? Questions over questions.”

Barty turns to Evan. “Take advantage of me. Please for the Love of Hell, fetishize the fuck out of me.”

James looks at the pair surprised. Well, if Barty is so desperate for Evan, he at least won’t try to mount Regulus like the damn dog he is.

Evan looks back at Barty and slowly licks his lips. James can see a shudder going through Barty’s entire body. He is impressed Barty doesn’t abandon all sense and bend Evan over the table right here.

“Well,” Evan rises, “You’ll have to excuse us. See you later. Reg, don’t come do the dorm.”

Barty is up and grinning as well. Regulus groans in frustration.

“Sorry not sorry. Take your time with your homework, yes? See you around, Sexy.” Barty winks at Regulus ruffles Pandora’s hair and leaves with Evan.

James growls low in his throat. Regulus looks up curiously.

“Why does he call you sexy and hot stuff?”

Regulus shrugs. “Because he’s Barty?”

“But why do you let him?”

“If I try fighting him on this matter it only gets worse. You should hear what he calls Evan in private. Or you shouldn’t. You would never recover.”

James bites his lip. Maybe, if Regulus doesn’t have the energy to fight him, it is Barty who gets to call him Baby.

“Does he call you Baby?”

Regulus blinks surprised. “No? Why would he?”

“Would you let him if he tried?”

Regulus smiles lightly and turns back to his homework. “No.”

Good. Very good. At least not him. But who?

An hour later, Dorcas comes up to their table and James almost has a heart attack.

“Babes! You won’t believe what Marls just told me!”

“That your left boob is bigger than the right? Because she is correct.”

Dorcas hits his arm and sits down across from him. “No. Marls heard from Mary, who heard from Lily, who was told by Gideon, that Fabian was told by Peter that Sirius and Remus are snogging in their dorm room.”

Regulus takes a moment to process this. “Ah. And you tell me this why?”

“Oh, right, Babes, because you hate gossip. Our friendship is not built on shit-talking Gryffindors at all. No offence, James. Also, why are you here?”

“I’m helping Regulus with his homework. Did you jut say Remus and Sirius are snogging?”

“Yeah.”

Regulus hums. “You owe me, Potter.”

James looks back at him, how his slender fingers hold his quill. An unruly curl fell into his eyes of stormy grey. A mischievous little smirk plays on his lips. There is a faint freckle just underneath his eye – James has declared it his favourite and he tries to kiss it all the time. It annoys Regulus greatly.

“My tits are fine,” Dorcas says after a while, “Panda, Babes, what do you think?”

“They’re gorgeous.”

“Thank you. See, Regulus, they’re gorgeous.”

“I said they’re asymmetrical, not hideous. I let your girlfriend decide that.”

“Speaking of. I gotta run, Babes. Pandora, are we still on for tonight in the Ravenclaw commons? Poker?”

“Of course. See you then.”

Dorcas leaves them again. James ponders her words. Babes isn’t quite Baby. Besides, Regulus made it sound like the person who gets to call him Baby is in fact a lover and he is definitely not getting it on with a girl.

“Well, James, I await you in front of my common room at 11:40 tonight,” Regulus says, packs up his things and then goes with Pandora to her common room to get over his hangover.

***

James picks him up at exactly 11 o’ 40 and takes him up to the Astronomy tower underneath his Invisibility Cloak.

He comes prepared. He spreads three large blankets on top of each other on the floor and tosses condoms and lube on them. He conjures a few candles for ambience.

“How romantic,” Regulus says already undressing, “You’re going to get us caught.”

“I think if anyone comes up here and sees us, it won’t be the candles that give us away.” James grins and pulls Regulus into a deep kiss. The clothes quickly land on the ground and lower themselves on the blankets. The air is pleasantly hot and the blankets of fake fur are incredibly warm and silky.

“These blankets are nice,” Regulus whispers while James kisses down his neck.

James hums against Regulus’ skin, mouthing at his collarbone. “We have a lot of those at my house. I could introduce a new tradition that every Black boy gets one if he comes to live with me.”

Regulus chuckles. “I could just steal this one. It’s soft.” Regulus pulls him back up to him and kisses his lips. “Now, I think you lost a bet and promised me something.” He kisses him again. “Something about that tongue.”

James smirks and shakes his head. “Your wish is my command, Love.”

Regulus smiles and quickly turns on his stomach.

James trails his lips down Regulus’ back. The thing with the tongue involves James placing it between his cheeks. He makes Regulus moan underneath him. He works him open with his tongue and his fingers until Regulus grasps the soft blanket and rubs himself against the material. James sucks a hickey on the inside of his thigh and fingers him. He hums against his skin when Regulus whimpers and moans, “Yes, fuck, yes, oh gods, Jamie, don’t stop!”

He muffles his pretty noises in the blanket. James grabs Regulus’ hips, pulls him up so he can reach around him and get him off while rimming him. Regulus moves back against James while calling his name and praising him to the gods. Regulus comes on the expensive blankets, shuddering and whimpering.

James grins satisfied with himself and kisses up his back again. Regulus collapses on the blanket, laughing while James sucks another hickey high on his neck.

“Good?” James whispers.

“Fucking perfect. You’re fucking perfect,” he pants.

“Thanks.” He kisses his cheek.

“Your turn.” Regulus grabs his wand and conjures some pillows on the blanket pile. “Lie down.”

James knows, following Regulus’ commands always ends in very good treatment for him. He makes sure not to lie in the wet spot. Regulus grabs the lube and the condom and gets on top of James.

He spits into his hand and grasps James’ cock. In James’ mind, there is nothing more erotic than all the tiny noises Regulus does when he is touched by him. Hearing him while he got him off, has James already almost fully hard. Regulus holds his gaze while moving his fist up and down his cock. James forces his eyes to stay open. He doesn’t want to miss one second of this.

Regulus applies the condom and spreads a generous amount of lube on him. He leans down and kisses James’ neck. James hums and squeezes Regulus’ thighs.

“Do you want to fuck me, Jamie?” Regulus whispers.

“Fuck, please, Reggie.”

“Think you deserved me?”

James pushes one hand into his curls. “Yes. You said I did good.”

“I said you did perfect.”

James grins and pulls Regulus to him to kiss him. He pushes Regulus down and bucks up his hips. Regulus laughs against his lips.

“Eager. Did Barty rile you up again earlier? You looked like you wanted to jump him – and not like you look when you want to jump me.”

“He called you hot stuff and sexy. Such a wanker.”

“Yeah, but he doesn’t get to fuck me. You do.”

Regulus sits up, reaches behind him and slowly lets himself sink down on James’ cock. James grabs Regulus' hips tightly.

Regulus throws his head back, moaning high-pitched and beautiful. James leans his head back and looks up at the sky. He almost forgot Regulus’ words from earlier: Fuck me under the stars.

The night sky above them is beautiful. And Regulus looks absolutely divine moving on top of him, the warm candlelight draws deep shadows on his skin, and his black curls get lost in the night sky.

James might be absolutely in love with him.

Regulus places his hands on James’ chest to keep himself upright while moving his hips and fucking himself on him. He rubs his fingers over James’ nipple and smirks when it draws a breathy moan from James.

Regulus enjoys getting fucked, even if he doesn’t come a second time. He likes the feeling and very much enjoys driving James a little crazy. His entire focus is just on James and his pleasure. He leans down and flicks his tongue over his nipple. He mouths at his collarbone and kisses and licks over his skin until he sucks a hickey on his neck at a spot where everyone will be able to see it if James doesn’t heal it.

James has his arms wrapped around Regulus, fucking into him from below, and drinking up every little noise and moan that escapes Regulus’ pretty lips.

“Fuck, yes, Baby,” he murmurs, and Regulus kisses him breathlessly.

A string of moans and nonsense words keep falling from his lips while he fucks into Regulus at a fast pace, his thrusts becoming more erratic. He pushes Regulus down on him when he comes. Regulus pants against his skin and kisses him while riding him through his orgasm.

James lets himself sink back into the pillows and Regulus sits up, grinning down at him. He lifts himself off James and slips between the blankets before he can grow cold. James does the same and pulls Regulus against him. He kisses his favourite freckle with a smile before Regulus lies down on his shoulder.

Regulus draws lazy patterns on James’ chest. He looks up at the sky.

“Are you visible tonight?” he murmurs and kisses the top of Regulus’ head.

Regulus turns to face the night sky. He points at the Leo constellation. “There.”

James finds the Regulus star and smiles. “Beautiful.”

“Me or my star?”

“Both.”

Regulus hums and turns again to kiss him sweetly. Maybe it doesn’t matter who gets to call him Baby. He is up here with him.

“Reggie, can I ask you something?”

Regulus hums and kisses his neck.

“Is there someone else?”

Regulus stops and slowly looks up. “Someone else?”

“Someone else you sleep with…”

He blinks at him confused. He lifts the blanket to reveal James’ naked body. “What on earth for?”

James rolls his eyes and pushes the blanket down. Regulus smirks and kisses his cheek.

“No, really, why would I sleep with someone else as long as I have you?”

James shrugs. “It’s hard to believe no one else wants you, that’s all… and well, we don’t have any rules, so you’d be well within your rights to just…”

“I didn’t say no one else wants me, I said I don’t fuck them. Are you fucking someone else?”

“What? No, of course not. I wouldn’t do that. You’re… everything I want.”

If James isn’t dreaming, Regulus looks positively relieved at his words. He probably shouldn’t read too much into it.

Regulus kisses him again and then rests on his shoulder, looking up at the stars.

James closes his eyes and imagines Regulus back on top of him, how absolutely beautiful he looked and how sexy he sounded. Then his own words he thoughtlessly muttered shoot back into his head.

He sits up with a gasp. Regulus, who was thrown off him by this, looks at him accusatorily. “What?”

“You – I – I called you Baby.”

“Yes? You always do…”

“I do?”

“Yes. Usually when you’re about to come.”

“Really?”

“Did you really not know?” Regulus frowns.

“No…” then James smiles brightly, “Huh. I’m the one who gets to call you Baby. Me. Only me.”

“Yes, James, only you get to call me Baby. It’d be horrid from anyone else.”

James beams at Regulus and pulls him into another deep kiss.

“You like me. You like me enough to let me call you Baby.”

Regulus rolls his eyes. “You’re so perceptive, that’s so hot. Yes, James, I like you. I mean, I don’t kill you every time you call me Twinkle Star, which is way worse than Baby. I’d probably let you call me anything.”

James chuckles. “And I was fucking worried you had someone else you liked more than me.”

At once, Regulus’ face turns to earnest. He loops his arms around his neck and looks deeply into his eyes. “Even if I slept with this whole school and had thousands of people shower me with affection, I’m rather sure I wouldn’t like anyone more than you.”

James cups his cheeks. “Really?”

“Yes, unfortunately.”

“Why unfortunately? That’s the best fucking thing I’ve ever heard. Reggie, Baby, all I really want is for us to not just be some thing. I want to be your boyfriend and I want you to come with me over the summer instead of going home.”

Regulus gnaws on his bottom lip and looks away. He carefully strokes over the soft furs of the blanket.

“You’ll even get a blanket. And me. A two-for-one deal, if you will.”

Regulus chuckles.

“Please, say yes. Be my boyfriend. Run away from home. Let’s tell Sirius and everyone else. Finally let me punch Barty in his obnoxious face. Just say yes, Baby.”

Regulus smiles fondly and looks up at him again. Finally, he sighs and shrugs. “Yes.”

“Yes?”

“Yes. Though I already regret you knowing about calling me Baby. You’ll use that against me forever.”

James laughs and kisses him, hot and open-mouthed.

***

The last Gryffindor party of the year is in full swing.

Regulus is sitting on a couch. Sirius and Remus are rolling around on the ground, snogging.

“Come on, Baby Black,” Marlene is complaining next to him on the couch, “Admit it: The Muggle music is amazing!”

“No.”

“Just admit it! I saw you dancing!”

“I did no’ dance! I moved. And don’ call me Baby. You’re no’ allowed.”

Marlene rolls her eyes. “You’re so boring.”

James, who sits on the armrest of the couch, slides in next to Regulus and puts his arm around him.

“Come on, admit you like the music, Baby.”

Regulus throws his head back and groans in frustration. “Fine. It sounds good. You’re awful.”

James grins and kisses him as a reward. Regulus and Sirius will come home with him tomorrow.

Notes:

Thanks for reading<3<3<3<3

What other obnoxious and annoying nicknames would our Marauders have for their partners?
Remus calls Sirius "grumpy old dog" or "Stupid big dog" etc but like fondly