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Chapter Text

The stale, acrid air of Svartalfheim burned Thor’s nostrils even as the grit in the air clung to his wet eyes.  This place, this land of blotted sun and death, was no fitting end place for a prince of Asgard.  For Thor’s own brother no less.  And yet, for the second time, Thor would have to watch Loki die.  The first had been a false death as Loki fell from the Bifrost by his own will and Thor had mourned more deeply than he’d known himself to be capable of.  Loki’s last desperate words coupled with the haunted look that turned eerily blank when Odin seemed to deny him.  Thor’s own echoing shout as Loki let go…they were pinned in his mind’s eye.  He had been so relieved to find that Loki still lived despite the circumstances.  Thor had been frustrated with his brother’s venom and choices, Thor had…responded more forcefully than perhaps he ought to have in hindsight.  But not for one moment did he cease loving his brother, not for one moment did he truly seek Loki’s death.

And now the little fool had played one last terrible trick:  Loki had given his life for Thor’s.

Thor watched the light leave Loki’s eyes and he clutched his brother’s body close with a wounded noise as tears streaked his dust-covered cheeks.  He wished he could make this right, that things could have been different.

“Brother.”  Thor had withheld the endearment since Loki’s release from his cell.  He had kept his distance at Odin’s urging and because he could not face the stranger with his brother’s face.  Thor’s heart was far more bruised than he would let on.  And now he said it far too late and wondered if Loki thought, despite what he had done for Thor, that he had lost Thor’s love.  As if such a thing was even possible.  As if Loki were not dearer to Thor than any being in all the realms and had been from the moment he first held the green-eyed babe as a toddler himself.

This was not how it was supposed to be, this was not how they were meant to end-

-Thor’s brow furrowed as he felt an unpleasant tingling, crawling sensation skitter up his arms.  He was confused at the sight of blackening veins on what flesh he could see.  He made a choked sound and Jane spoke words of concern but they were lost to him as a ferocious ringing filled his ears.  Thor’s lungs felt sluggish in his chest and his vision darkened to pinpricks.  He tried to speak but he could not be sure his mouth even moved.  Thor wasn’t aware he had started to fall until he found himself chest-to-chest with his brother’s body on the ground.  He lost all sense of himself after that and succumbed to darkness.

--xx--

Breath flooded Thor’s lungs as he awoke with a sharp inhale and a start.  He clutched his chest against a choked feeling as he fixed his eyes on a bright, blue sky and gasped on air that was grit-free and smelled of grass.

“Thor!  Someone fetch a healer!”

“Brother?  Brother, look at me.”

The voice was familiar as Thor blinked blearily at the silhouettes above him.  He felt a hand on his chest as his vision started to come into focus.  Dark hair and flashes of green eyes set in a pale face.  Thor lifted a hand to the face and pressed his palm to the cheek wonderingly.  Was this some manner of dream?

--

The day had been like any other.  Thor and his merry band, with Loki in tow, had taken to the sparring ring.  They had been at it little under an hour when Thor and Loki set for a match.  Thor wielded a sword while Loki wielded his daggers and Thor’s face was alight with a grin as he faced his younger brother.

When Thor got Loki on the back foot, the elder laughed as he offered.  “Use your tricks, brother.  We have not sparred in some time, I would not have this end too quickly.”

The words grated on Loki, how could they not, and he wanted to wipe the smug look from his brother’s golden face.  Stubbornly, he persisted in using his daggers alone and Thor expressed his displeasure by shoving against Loki and sticking his foot out to trip his brother.

Loki fell to the ground while Thor clucked his tongue.

“I warned you, Loki.”  Thor said with a chuckle as he waved his sword jauntily before he offered his brother a hand.  “Well, perhaps next-”

Loki heard his brother’s chuckle and heard the snickers from some in attendance.  Never mind that it had been a poor sport tactic given the sort of match they were in, Thor’s friends would always side with him.  On other days, Thor might complain if Loki used his ‘tricks’ but now he wanted them because he found Loki not challenging enough?  Loki felt a swell of hurt and anger rise in him as Thor leaned to offer him a hand.  His response was to impulsively fling a blast of green, sorcerous power at Thor.  Were Thor braced for it, the blow wouldn’t have been all that bad, but somewhat off balance and unexpected as it was it knocked Thor back.  He released his sword and through a comedy of errors, managed to fall back on his sword while the hilt had just met the ground.  The tip cut a few inches along Thor’s back and side.

But even so, it should not have been a blow that undid his brother, Thor could take far worse blows.

Yet Thor did not rise.

Sif and the Warriors Three rushed forward, Loki was delayed a few seconds by shock as he saw the small dribble of blood at Thor’s side and the way that Thor was not responding.  He scrambled to his feet to see that Thor’s eyes had rolled back into his head with his hands clenched as if in spasm, his expression pulled painfully taut with a quiet agony.

Sif shoved him then with a look of horror and Loki stumbled back.  She should never touch a prince so, but it wasn’t as if any of them truly stood on decorum with him.  Not with a Thor-shaped shield at their backs.  “What have you done?”  she demanded.

Loki, in another circumstance, might have responded with anger or carefully chosen words.  But in this instance, Loki was genuinely shocked by what had happened and immediately concerned.  “I know not.”  he said quickly before he pushed past Thor to kneel by his brother’s side.  He had hit him with only a small blast!  Thor could shrug such things off in his sleep!

“Brother?  Brother, look at me.”  Loki urged as he pressed a hand against Thor’s chest.  His brother appeared unusually pale and had mumbled something incoherent before he saw the familiar blue eyes swivel his direction with an unfocused look.  Thor’s palm found Loki's face as Thor’s expression became something almost curious.  Loki was confused but immediately slipped his hand up to cover over the top of Thor’s.  “Can you hear me, Thor?”  he asked urgently.  Loki had been cross with the oaf and Thor more than deserved his own tumble in the dirt but Loki never wished to actually hurt his brother.

“...Loki.”  The name was half-mumbled but a relief nonetheless.

“That’s right.”  Loki confirmed as he studied Thor’s eyes which seemed more alert and showed no signs of injury.  He was surprised when the hand on his cheek fell to his chest and Thor clenched his fingers into Loki’s tunic.

“The…wound…”  Thor muttered and Loki’s brow furrowed.

“Your sword grazed you.”  Loki assumed Thor meant the small wound on his own back.  “Come, we will-”

“-We will take him.”  Sif said as she cut over Loki.  Volstagg was already at hand to start helping Thor up as he seemed lucid enough to rise.

Loki bristled at that as he rose along with them.  His brother looked confused for all that he did seem at least to be looking around.

“You have done enough damage, Loki.  Thor extended his hand to you, and you attacked him for it.”  Sif said with a hard expression.  Fandral’s expression was more hesitant, guilty perhaps though he did not come to Loki’s defense and Volstagg seemed focused on attending to Thor while Hogun watched the proceedings.

“Thor demanded-”

“-He is bleeding.”  Volstagg said and while he interrupted Loki, it did not seem his intent particularly more than that he was genuinely concerned.  “Quarrel later if you both must, I would see Thor to a healer.”

Sif and Loki both wore challenging expressions that softened to similar looks of concern as Volstagg redirected their focus.

“A strange dream.”  Thor muttered to the concern of all present and Loki’s expression fell though he hid it quickly.

They did not wait for permission to start taking Thor to the healing wing and Loki started to follow only to stop.  Thor would doubtless be furious when he awoke, Loki was sure to get an earful from their father, and Sif was sure to continue with the icy reception.  It was not as if Thor’s friends wanted Loki’s presence either.  So as much as he wanted to go with his brother and guilty as he felt about the turn of events, he let them go.  Why did things always go so wrongly for Loki?

--

Thor’s mind was a blur and his surroundings passed by him in a haze.  Every time he latched onto a clear stream of thought it flitted from his grasp.  He had heard his brother, had seen him, but sans the wound that Loki had just been delivered.  His hair had seemed shorter too from the squinted glimpse Thor had caught of him.

He heard as if through cotton-filled ears the muffled argument between his dream-brother and…Sif and the Warriors Three?  Thor tried to speak but his words came out jumbled and quiet.  He felt sluggish and strange, but not injured as he’d felt only moments before on Svartalfheim.

The orange shimmer of a Soul Forge was the next clear sight he had and after a fashion, his thoughts came to him more clearly.  Thor could not quite say he felt rightly, but the sluggishness had worn down and his thoughts were not so slippery.  He was helped from the Soul Forge as a healer told him something about his wound being very slight and asking questions which he mumbled distracted answers to.

Not until he heard his mother’s voice did Thor’s attention sharply find a fixed point.

“What has happened?”  Frigga asked as she entered the room with regal swiftness while all present gave gestures of respect.

“Thor was injured, your grace.”  Sif said with a tone that barely contained the thread of anger beneath.  She did not offer more yet, she waited for the invitation to follow.

“Injured how?”  Frigga asked as she studied her son whose expression was wide-eyed and dazed upon her.

“A sparring match with Prince Loki.”  Sif said.  “Respectfully, Loki had fallen and Thor offered a hand.  Loki met that hand with sorcery.  Thor fell and was injured upon his own sword, he has been in a dizzy state since.”

A slight frown tugged Frigga’s lips at that but her gaze was focused on Thor as she examined him.  “Thor?”

“Mother.”  The endearment spilled from Thor’s lips as she seemed the clearest thing he had seen in the strange dream.  His mother looked more beautiful than he remembered, a sight he had thought never to see again.  The feel of her questioning fingertips upon his cheek and the sound of her voice caused his heart to thump with painful longing.  And then a new thought occurred to him.  “Is…this Valhalla?”  he asked.

Sif and the others exchanged concerned glances while Frigga smoothed Thor’s hair from his face.  “No, dear heart.  You are a good few millennia too young for that.”  she added with gentle wryness.

Thor blinked the last of the cobwebs from his thoughts as the hazy images of Svartalfheim became the images of his mind’s eye and not what he saw clearly before him.  His mother, alive and well, and they in the healing wing of Asgard.  If not Valhalla, then it must be a dream.  But if so, he could not stay, Jane awaited him on Svartalfheim…had he fallen unconscious?

“Do you remember what happened, Thor?”  Frigga asked lightly.

“Svartalfheim.”  he croaked before he cleared his throat.  “I must go back.”

Frigga’s brow furrowed slightly even as she again smoothed her son’s hair as a comforting gesture.  “Never have you been to Svartalfheim, my son.  You were in the sparring ring, do you not recall?”

Thor stared at the dream-mother before him.  “I am dreaming.”  he informed her even as he tried to will himself awake.

“I assure you that you are not.”  Frigga said with a pointed glance at a healer who began to examine Thor anew.

Thor rose abruptly with a light stumble before he caught himself against the side of the Soul Forge.  “Wake up.”  he muttered to himself as he jabbed his fingers into his palm in hopes that pain would wake him.

“Thor.”  Sif sounded wholly concerned.  “This is no dream.”

It occurred to Thor that the presence of Sif and the Warriors Three out and free was also strange.  They had aided and abetted his ‘treason’, so how were they so casually about?  And why did they speak of the sparring ring when Thor had just been dealing with the Aether?

“He has hit his head harder than we have thought.”  Fandral said in a worried half-mutter.

“Or else Prince Loki’s sorcery was meant for more than force.”

“Loki is here?”  Thor asked as he realized he had a newly muddled memory of seeing his brother over him.  He moved away as he tried to get his bearings and his mother followed behind as Thor went to a nearby window and looked out with a confused frown.  The sight of Bor’s statue in the distance, whole, caught Thor’s attention.

“You just decapitated your grandfather."

“This must be a dream.”  he muttered, only to startle at the feel of his mother’s hand on his shoulder.  That certainly felt real.  Thor glanced back at his mother only to have his gaze drawn back to a mirror.  He and his mother stood side-by-side but that wasn’t the sight that shocked him most.  His reflection in the mirror was not his own, not as he had been at least.  The hair was faintly shorter, the cheeks and frame slightly thinner.  His clothing was in line with something he would have worn several decades ago.  The difference was not so great, and yet it was enough to notice a difference.  Thor did not look as he had just hours before.  He put a tentative hand to his cheek as his reflection did the same and Thor exhaled slowly.  “It’s not possible.”  he whispered.

“My son.”  Frigga moved to stand before Thor who stared at his mother with new eyes.  “Let the healer look you over.”  she said kindly.  “You seem in a daze.”

“Mother.”  Thor said as if in realization.  He allowed her to steer him back towards the bed as his mind raced with impossibilities.  This could not be, he could not be here, not truly.

Frigga’s hand was familiar against his shoulder, the same gentle touch and scent, the same kind and well-loved eyes.

Impossible.

Wasn’t it?

--xx--

Loki gave up his attempt at reading after the tenth re-read of the same sentence produced no comprehension in his mind.  He was too distracted and restless.  Loki did not enjoy sparring with Thor and his friends but he was compelled to for two reasons:  because sometimes Thor would force the matter, and because Loki wanted to spend time with his brother.  If the only way he could have Thor was to suffer Thor’s friends and the jeering that tended to follow sparring then…so be it.

The realization was a pathetic one if he let himself dwell too long.  He had no friends of his own to speak of but instead clung to his ‘big brother’ even as Thor drifted further from him.  Loki felt at some point he must have made a habit of that.  As a child, he had followed Thor about and been welcomed to.  When the welcome waned, Loki could do no less than to continue what he had always done.  He tried in his own ways to please his brother, to include himself even if Thor would not, and hope that it might yield fruit.  That someday Thor might again look on Loki with eyes that actually saw him and that actually cared.  Instead of eyes fixed only ahead with the expectation that Loki would trail behind as Thor’s loyal and ever-present shadow.

This latest incident would not help matters.  Like as not, Thor would blame him although he had started it and then Loki would have deal with Thor’s ire.  Or Thor would dismiss the incident and Loki would be forced to ingratiate himself back into the fold knowing full well Sif and the rest would not be glad of his company.  Thor would not invite him back, and nor would he decline him.

To feel unwanted by his own brother and greatest friend hurt.  But Loki could not imagine telling Thor as much.  His brother would laugh it off, perhaps think Loki’s woes imagined, and Loki would feel the worse for the admission and the rejection.  Some days he wanted to be as callous as Thor seemed at times.  He wanted to be able not to care where Thor’s gaze lay, or feel a need to seek his esteem, or feel the ache of loneliness at the slightest of Thor’s dismissals.

But for all his ‘tricks’, that was one that Loki had never yet managed.

The sudden knock at his door surprised him and he braced himself as he assumed he would be summoned for an audience with his father.  He was quite floored to see Thor on the other side of the door.

Thor’s wrath was to be the response then.  Well, Loki could not say he hadn’t expected it.  “Brother.”  Loki said through a flutter of anxiety and resignation.

--

Thor had slowly but surely taken the measure of his situation and reached a conclusion.  He was either dreaming, cursed, or somehow had…crossed the distance of time to the past.  This was clearly not Valhalla and he found himself hard-pressed to believe with each passing moment that what he was experiencing was a dream.  Which left either a curse or the more miraculous, that he had somehow traversed time.  Curses and time travel were not his fortes, such things fell in the realms of magics and he managed to be the odd duck in his family in that he was conspicuously lacking in magical knowledge or affinity.  Thor had sense enough to know that he should not reveal himself just now if ever, he knew too little.  And he might end up in trouble for his efforts, as he seemed to have possessed the Thor of this time [if indeed this was time travel] and attempts to convey his true identity might end badly for him.  Thor needed more information and an understanding of his position.

He did not think a curse was likely given that Svartalfheim had been barren.  If there had been a sorcerous working afoot, then surely Loki with all his prowess would have noticed it.

Loki.

Here, Loki was alive.

As he spoke to the others Thor gained more clarity on what he’d seen upon waking.  He seemed to have been sparring with Loki and Thor had been knocked down by Loki’s sorcery.  Sif and the Warriors Three had taken him to the healing ward while Loki stayed behind.  Except Thor vaguely recalled snatches of their conversation and he was certain Loki’s assistance had been dismissed.  Thor had been fighting with a sword and that caught his attention for a different reason.  He had stopped his use of swords after he had gained Mjolnir and been declared the crown prince.  So here and now, he must not yet have been declared, he and Loki were princes of equal status and in Thor’s estimation within a century of his would-be coronation.

But what did that mean of his own time?  Jane would have no idea how to return home without him though Thor assumed the Einherjar would not be long behind.  His father would know where Thor had gone as far as Svartalfheim.  But how had this happened, how long would it last, and what truly was happening?

Thor reached a decision to keep his peace for the time being and he set himself to the task of allaying the concerns roused by his ‘strange’ behavior.  He made a show of regaining his senses as he suddenly remembered clearly the sparring match.  Thor laughed off the whole affair and made his excuses, though Frigga seemed dubious.  Sif and the Warriors Three seemed eager to stay by his side but Thor put them off as he said he wished to find his brother.

He was surprised to note how displeased Sif in particular seemed by that, whereas Frigga seemed more relaxed.

When Thor was alone he did not head straight to his brother and instead made an attempt to better understand when he was, if such was the question to be asked.  Sure enough, Mjolnir was not in his gift at this time and an examination of his own room and dated letters told him exactly when he was.  Roughly seventy-some years before his near-coronation.  Before everything went so wrong.

I could fix things.  Thor’s mind supplied but he brushed the thought aside quickly.  He had to return to his own time, surely, and he still was not absolutely sure that he had ‘simply’ traveled time.  His family members would be the best ones to ask but that was out of the question presently, a last resort perhaps.

A last resort.

Thor saw Kurse’s blade plunge through Loki’s chest.  He saw his brother’s life ebbing as Thor held Loki in his arms.

“I’m a fool.  I’m a fool.  I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m sorry.”

“I didn’t do it for him."

Thor closed his eyes against the memories and the fierce pain they brought.  The trickster’s last trick indeed.  “Oh, brother…” he murmured as he scanned the contents of recent letters.  No dream could be so precise and in that, he felt reasonably certain he could rule out a dream then.  But not a curse, and not that he’d traversed time.  Which was likelier?  And what should he do in either case?

Whatever he should do there was one thing that he wanted to do.  A compulsion he could not further ignore:  Thor needed to see his brother.

So to Loki’s door he went and there saw Loki clear-eyed for the first time since entering this other time.

Not so much younger with only a handful of decades till their broken future, but somehow Loki seemed younger all the same.  The eyes did not peer at Thor with suspicion, the lip was not curled with disdain, the haughty glare was absent.  The palpable tension was not present between them.  Instead, Loki if anything looked almost nervous, it was concealed beneath the twitch of his lips and the stiffness of his fingers.  Why should he be nervous unless…was this his Loki?

“Will you be coming in or-?”  Loki asked and Thor realized with a start he had been staring.

“I’m not your brother, I never was."

“Will you make that witless oaf king while I rot in chains?”

Thor stepped into his brother’s room with a newfound hesitance and he could not take his eyes from his brother.  That too seemed to increase Loki’s anxiety, from wherever it stemmed, and Loki seemed distinctly uncomfortable.

“Will you not say something?”  Loki finally asked as he lifted his gaze to Thor’s with an air of reluctance.

“You’re really here.”  The words left Thor’s lips before he could think on them, overwhelmed as he was to see not only a living brother but this brother.

Confusion was writ on Loki’s brow as he replied slowly.  “Should I not be?  This is my room, you may have noticed?”

A touch of sarcasm but it lacked the bite and venom of the future.  The gentle sass of his little brother.  Thor had nearly forgotten what Loki’s voice sounded like in calm tones.  Ones that were not painted in shades of resentment and rage.

Then again…

“I remember a shadow!  Living in the shade of your greatness!”

Even now, behind the green eyes that seemed so comparatively innocent, did Loki’s wrath already lurk?  When had it begun?

“Are you quite well?”  Loki asked as Thor did not speak again and continued his eerie staring.  “Should you have left the healing ward yet?”

“I am well.”  Thor said even as he felt a strange marvel at Loki’s casual concern.  He fished for more to say as he realized how odd his behavior would seem.  “The…the sword cut was a small one, easily mended.”  Guilt flashed across Loki’s face before a mask replaced it and that odd look of resignation that Loki had worn on his arrival.  He could not guess for why.

“...It was not my intent to cause you true harm, Thor.”  Loki said at last.

“I know.”  Thor said simply.

“I was-I beg your pardon-you know?”  The furrowed brow returned and the look was so familiarly quizzical.

“I should not have goaded you so.”  He had understood enough to realize what must have happened, despite the spin that Sif had put on it.

“I-”  Loki seemed at a loss but recovered quickly.  “I should not have struck you when you offered me aid."

“I do not doubt I deserved it.”  Thor said and Loki seemed baffled at that.

“Brother, are you sure you are feeling well?”  Loki asked uncertainly.

Arguably not.  Thor had lost his mother, his brother, committed treason, left Jane stranded in a hostile realm, had no proper idea of what was happening or how to fix it, and he had displaced the Thor who should be in his place.  He did not relish the thought.  But at the precise moment as he could not fix it, he could only move forward.  “Aye.”  Thor said as he indulged in an urge and brought his hand to Loki’s neck in their gesture of affection.

Loki blinked but otherwise didn’t so much as flinch.  He didn’t glare, pull away, berate, curse, or any number of other negative reactions.  In fact, his hand came up to gently curve over Thor’s wrist as he studied his older brother’s face.

Loki, dark-veined and lifeless with eyes that saw nothing.

Thor drank in the sight of his brother hale and whole, the green eyes puzzled but concerned.  The simple touch from Loki, offered freely and without reservation, nearly stole Thor’s breath away.  He had kept away from Loki when he was in the cells of Asgard through great force of will.  But he saw in that moment that had Loki given him just one such affectionate gesture, just one sliver of hope, Thor could no more have kept from his side than the stars could cease to accompany the moon.  A Loki who had not sent the Destroyer after him, had not sought death in the void of the Bifrost, had not attempted to conquer Midgard, had not died for-

“Brother?”

And Gods, Loki’s voice was so concerned as his grip on Thor’s wrist tightened.  The green eyes peered searchingly into Thor’s own blue ones.

“What is it?”  Loki asked.

Thor felt a conflicting urge to laugh mingled with a choked feeling like a restrained sob.

Loki was dead.

Loki was alive.

Thor abruptly pulled the younger man into a tight embrace and he heard a surprised yelp from his brother as he tensed with his hands at Thor’s sides.  He buried his face in Loki’s neck as he squeezed his brother and did not so much as receive a dagger to the side.  Loki did not pull away or rage, tentatively but undeniably, he hugged Thor back.  “It is good to see you, brother.”  Thor said hoarsely against Loki’s hair.

Loki was more bewildered by the moment and ever more certain his brother had taken more injury than he let on or seemed to believe.  He found himself pulled into a tight embrace and was so stunned a moment he could only be stiff in Thor’s arms.  But then his arms slid around Thor in turn and he heard raw emotion in his older brother’s voice.  He was not sure what to say to the gesture, words, or tone and so finally settled on.  “And you, brother.”  What else could he say?  Loki heard Thor chuckle lightly into his hair and he frowned as he thought back to the condition Thor had been in on the sparring field.  His eyes had rolled back in his head as his body spasmed, it was not a state Loki had seen Thor in before.  Loki covertly pressed about Thor’s person with his sorcery as he looked for a sign of anything amiss but came up with nothing.  But still, the anticipation of what might yet be coming left him unable to resist asking.  “Are you not cross with me, Thor?”

Thor paused at the question.  Why would Loki even ask such a thing?  Loki lived to agitate and make mischief at Thor, why so meekly ask that?  He recollected Loki’s reaction to find Thor in the doorway and frowned.  What would he have done before, the Thor of before?  He supposed he might have been cross depending on how he took Loki’s actions.  Thor would not have been pleased to see Loki not among those in the healing wing, as if Loki had harmed him and then not bothered even to see that he was alright.  But Thor may have been of a mood to be sheepish about the affair, annoyed and embarrassed and thus interested in pretending the event had not happened.  Thor had shown up to Loki’s door and now Loki asked such a question…he expected anger, then.  He reluctantly pulled away though his hands lingered on Loki’s shoulders as Loki’s [to Thor’s pleasant surprise] lingered on Thor’s sides.  “You did only as I asked.  I am not cross with you.”  he reassured his brother and felt a twinge of pain at the flicker of doubt he saw on Loki’s face.

Thor squeezed his brother’s arm to reassure him as he offered him a light smile.  What did it say that the gesture did not seem to cause Loki to relax?

A knock at the door interrupted them and in short order a servant announced a summons for Loki to the Allfather.

Loki felt his heart sink and braced himself for the scolding that was likely to result.  “It seems I must speak with Father…I will see you at dinner?”

“I am going with you.”  Thor announced and Loki stared at his brother in surprise.

“Father did not ask for you.”

“He will have me nonetheless.”

Loki was half-tempted to ask Thor yet again if he was sure nothing was wrong but let it pass.  As the brothers walked the hall he wondered if this was one of Thor’s rare moments of clever payback.  Perhaps he would use the audience to condemn Loki rather than berate Loki himself.

Thor had dual reasons for wanting to see his father.  His mother had not seen a change in him, but if Odin would, then Thor wished to have that matter out of the way now.  He also was reluctant to let Loki from his sight and knew too well how their father’s temper could rile.

The brothers entered their father’s study and he looked up from his papers with only a faint showing of surprise.  “My sons.”

“Father.”  They said in unison, habits were easy enough for Thor to fall back on and there was no great difference in this instance.

Odin’s eye lingered on his eldest and then his youngest before he asked.  “What went on in the sparring yard this day?”

Loki braced himself as he opened his mouth to speak but startled when Thor beat him to the punch.

“I lost my footing and fell.  A simple cut from sword was consequence.  All is well now, Father.  No matter for your concern.”

Loki tried not to gape as Thor more or less lied.

Odin’s brow lifted slightly as he regarded his sons.  “I have heard tell that sorcery was involved.”

“Aye, Father.”  Thor said casually.  “I wished to try my hand at combating Loki’s sorcery.  I was not so quick to guard against it as I hoped.”

Thor must have gone a touch mad from the encounter, Loki decided, he had no other explanation for the sudden behavior.  Thor’s response was measured, his little half-truths flowed easily, and Thor had not seemed the least bit angry at what transpired even though he’d ended up in the healing ward.

“Then, Loki has done you no ill?”  Odin clarified.

“No.”  he clapped a hand on his brother’s back.  “He did only as I asked, and the only true wound was to my pride.”  Thor said lightly and realized he may have gone slightly too far when Odin’s eyes narrowed slightly.

He supposed that was a touch [or greatly] humble for Thor at this age.  Even if Thor had acknowledged that Loki was not at fault, he was not likely to casually jest about his pride.

“I had heard otherwise.”  Odin said.  “But I am relieved that it is so.  You are well, my son?”

“Completely.”  Thor said definitively and Odin nodded.

“Very well, you may both go.”

The brothers took their leave as Odin watched their departure thoughtfully.

--

Loki could not still his tongue when they were alone in the hall.  “Why did you do that?”  he all but blurted out.

“Do what?”  Thor asked, as if he did not know perfectly well.

Loki frowned as he tried to decide if he was being mocked, although it made little sense given that Thor had just covered for him.  [Sort of].  “You are truly not angry about what happened?”

Thor felt it would be odder if he were anything but casual about the matter at that point, although he did not like to face how thoroughly Loki seemed to expect a poor reaction from him.  The matter was negligible at best and had come at Thor’s instigation.  Did Loki really think him such a brute?  “The sooner you stop speaking of it, the sooner we may both forget it.”  he said pointedly and Loki looked faintly troubled.

“Are you-”

“-If you ask me once more if I am well, brother, I will not be.”  Thor said wryly and Loki fell silent.

A Loki who was worried about Thor’s mood, one who still saw Odin as a father, one who did not hide his expressions quite so well.  Perhaps this was near the precipice.  The turning point which Thor had somehow missed wherein Loki had drifted beyond his reach with an ever-expanding chasm between them.  Was there a single moment that sparked it, or was it truly the work of moments such as these over time?

Though he knew in some ways he could not have done so, Thor regretted all the same that he had not tried to ask his brother.  But there was likely no honest answer he would get if Loki didn’t simply mock him outright for asking.  He could guess at his brother’s reply.

‘Did you not say my slights were imagined?’.  And he might couple it with that disdainful sneer.

Before Thor had realized it they had reached Loki’s room.  He had not given thought to what would come after.  Thor wanted to stay at his brother’s side, but recognized that it would only be further strange behavior in this instance.  He cursed mentally when he realized he had been staring again and Loki seemed to have noticed.  “Then I will see you tonight.  At dinner?”  Thor said quickly and there again was the little furrow in Loki’s brow.

“Mm.”  Loki hummed a reply.  “Perhaps you should lie down in the meanwhile.”

“You wish to make an invalid of me?”  Thor attempted a light jest that didn’t land as Loki’s mouth twisted.  Did he think it was a commentary on what happened earlier?  “Worry not, brother.  You of all people know I am hard-headed.”  Surprise flickered in Loki’s expression and then a small smile that Thor did not realize until that moment he had missed powerfully.

“Indeed.”  Loki agreed.  “I do not think Mjolnir itself is a match for your thick skull, brother.”  he said wryly.

Loki was teasing him, with neither malice nor bitterness, simply teasing him.

Thor resisted the urge to embrace his brother again as he offered a light grin back.  “That is one challenge I think I shall resist undertaking.”

Loki’s smile widened a touch before he pushed at Thor’s shoulder.  “Go on, you oaf.  You have interrupted my reading.”  he complained, emboldened now that Thor seemed in good mood but no less baffled by his brother’s behavior.

“Apologies.”  Thor said dryly.  “It is unfortunate I rank below a book in your interest.  I will endeavor to do better next time.”  His attempt to continue their banter seemed to fall short at that as Loki’s smile slipped somewhat.

“You are welcome to try.”  Loki finally said as he inclined his head before he slipped into his room.  He heard his brother’s footsteps trail the hall and he leaned his back against his door as he considered all that had occurred.  Thor’s mood was strangely light…he wasn’t sure what to make of it or the complete disregard for the sparring incident.

He thought of the abrupt hug and the way that Thor had spoken of being glad to see Loki as though they’d been parted a great while.  Loki supposed he could only chalk it up to Thor having not been properly whacked on the head for some time and that he would likely be his boisterous self again in short order.

He ignored the twinge of disappointment he felt at the thought.

--

Thor pondered his next move as he left Loki’s door.  The situation was one he would have normally gone to his brother for help over, if not their parents.  He was on his own for the time being.  Thor turned his mind back to Svartalfheim and what might have caused his situation and another memory interrupted unbidden.

Kurse’s blade pierced Loki’s chest-

“See you in Hel, monster.”

Thor wasn’t one to analyze words, certainly not as his brother or his father were inclined to.  However, Loki had died a warrior’s death and yet he had not mentioned Valhalla but the icy lands of Helheim.  He called Kurse a monster while speaking of seeing him there.  Did Loki think of himself that way?  Even in his last moments, did he think himself a monster and not to be granted Valhalla?

“You should know that when we fought each other in the past, I did so with a glimmer of hope that my brother was still in there somewhere.  That hope no longer exists to protect you.  Betray me, and I will kill you.”

Thor briefly closed his eyes against the echo of his own words before he continued on.  One of the last things he had said to his brother was a lie but did Loki know it for one?  For all that Loki had earned the name ‘Liesmith’ and held a secondary title as God of Lies, he never seemed able to see the truth where love was concerned.  Thor could stand before his brother and claim him such with every ounce of love he possessed and Loki would disbelieve him or so it had seemed.  But Loki had saved him.  He could have fled, he could have spared himself a return to his cells by letting Thor die but instead…Loki had compensated for Thor’s moment of weakness, his inability to kill Kurse himself and avenge their mother.

An echo of the boys they were hung in his mind’s eye as he walked the halls.  A pair of brothers racing and laughing as they teased and goaded.  A giddy hug as they nearly ran into a servant and burst into laughter after trying to keep composed while being scolded.  A shared look of mischief that said the race would continue at first opportunity.

Thor came to a halt beside a window as he looked out over Asgard, still intact, not having suffered his flying theatrics.

“I think you missed a column.”

“Shut up, Loki.”

A rueful smile curved Thor’s lips before it faded upon his sigh as he clenched a hand on the window ledge.  He had struggled with Loki’s presence in the cells.  His own anger and hurt warred with his need for answers and confrontation.  Thor was not one to let a matter lie, he did not have the nature of his brother who could play the long-game for an end result.  He had wanted to storm down to the cells and demand answers, perhaps plead for them, shake sense into his brother, hold him until the madness left his eyes.  Loki denied him with word and actions but Thor had seen the grief in his brother’s eyes.  Who had given Loki the Tesseract and the Chitauri?  Why did Loki, his pensive and careful brother, suddenly become a man who could turn the Bifrost on Jotunheim and rain fire on Midgard?  He had no love for the mortals but Loki had never been a cruel man, he had not been one to cause death needlessly.

But then, ‘suddenly’ was the wrong way to think of it, was it not?  The rage that consumed his brother had been there before the revelation of his parentage, that much was clear.  Loki had thwarted his coronation and there had been a rightness to it.  With hindsight, Thor could admit he had not been ready for the throne.  But Loki’s methods had cost two guards their lives and started a terrible chain of events.

He would not have needed to if you had been worthy.

The thought had crossed Thor’s mind before, that his own failings had instigated what followed.  But he knew altruism had not been Loki’s sole motivator, especially knowing what he knew now.  The conflict in their brotherhood had spilled over into the realms and many had suffered for it.

Loki was dead because of it.

He’s not dead here.  His mind offered, a temptation that Thor pushed from his mind.  This was not his time [again assuming it wasn’t a curse] and the people of his own time needed him.  Could the dispersed Aether have caused this?  Thor did not know it to hold such power and he had thought in the state he left the Aether in that it was negated for the moment.

“Thor.”

He turned to see his friends and smiled on instinct despite his dark thoughts, Sif specifically had addressed him and he gave a general greeting.

“Feeling better?”  Fandral asked.

“Aye, I have had worse.”  Thor chuckled as he both maintained the appearance of being ‘this Thor’ while falling into centuries of friendly rhythm with his familiar companions.

“You gave us a scare.”  Volstagg said.  “The queen as well.”

Thor gave them a dismissive expression.  “You all worry too much, it was a simple tumble, nothing more.”

“But it was more.”  Sif said.  “You offered Loki your hand and he struck you.”

Thor assumed Sif spoke from concern in her insistence at Loki’s ill behavior over his own.  “I goaded him to it.”

“To strike outside of fair play?”  Sif asked.  “You were hurt, Thor, whether you wish to admit it or not.”

“It was nothing.”  Thor emphasized again.  “The matter is done, Sif.”  he said pointedly.  Her expression spoke of displeasure and he half-expected her to continue but she inclined her head.

“Shall we take to the dining hall early?  I imagine a tankard of mead would not be unwelcome.”  Fandral suggested.

“I am promised elsewhere.  Mother wishes to speak with me.”  Thor lied.  “I will see you tonight.”

“Till the evening then!”  Fandral said as Thor headed off on his way.  When he had gone the four made their way the opposite direction.

“He would defend a craven blow.”  Sif muttered.

“Do not let it bother you so.  The wound was minor, let well enough alone.”  Volstagg said.

“All the same, I expected Thor to be more…upset about it.”  Fandral said mildly.  “He seemed genial overall.”

“He was confused on waking, but sorcery can do strange things to the mind.  If any real harm were done, the queen would know of it.”  Volstagg pointed out.

“The matter is settled then.”  Fandral declared.  “If it troubles Thor not, then neither shall it trouble us.”

--

Thor could not speak to those whom he would usually turn to, or anyone for that matter.  The thought of poring over texts in the library was not a pleasant one, nor one that promised to be fruitful.  Thor had no idea what he was looking for.  A book on curses, on time travel, perhaps on the Aether?  But then, there was one person who would keep their conversation private unless specifically asked by the Allfather, which was unlikely…

--

“What do you know of traversing time?”  Thor asked of Heimdall after he reached the Bifrost Gate room and exchanged greetings.

“Traversing time?”  Heimdall repeated as he stared at Thor in that particular way of his that had made Thor as a boy feel that Heimdall knew each and every secret he held.  “Little.  I have never known it to be done.”

“But what is known of it?”  Thor emphasized.

“The Allfather or prince would be better suited to answer your question.”  Heimdall pointed out.

“My Father has his mind to other matters and…I fear Loki would laugh at my queries.”  Thor lied and heard an echo of Loki’s voice in his mind.

“I’m impressed."

Thor swallowed down the pain that accompanied the hint of memory.

Heimdall’s expression gave nothing away but after a moment’s consideration answered.  “The past cannot be changed, to travel time is to travel worlds parallel.”

The answer made Thor’s heart sink.  “You speak of…alternate realities?”  It was a theoretical principle that Thor knew very little about.  A topic which he mostly remembered only in the context of a period of time where Loki had taken great interest in seeking the ‘places in-between’.  Thor had paid little attention at the time and now had cause to regret it.

“There exist realms beyond our own.  Dimensions that even sorcerers may walk.”  Heimdall answered plainly.  “The Queen has spoken of our lives as tales weaved in a tapestry.  If that is so, you could not undo a section of weaving without destroying all that came after.”

Come to think of it, Thor realized, he had heard his mother say the same but he had not applied it to his current predicament.  If that was true…but he had traveled time…did that mean he was where he should not be, or that he was in another reality entirely?

“What do you know of the Aether?”  Thor could not help but ask.

The question seemed to give Heimdall pause before he said.  “It has been hidden for thousands of years, since the war on Svartalfheim by King Bor.”

“And…of the Aether’s powers?”

“The Aether is a thing of unmaking.  The dark elves would have used it for destruction.”  Heimdall said by way of answer.  “More than that, I do not know.”

Unmaking and destruction didn’t fit Thor’s situation.  The conversation shortly came to a close and Thor retired to his room for the evening.  He still found it hard to fathom what the situation increasingly seemed to be: that somehow against all reason Thor had wound up decades in the past after just holding his fallen brother in his arms.  Or, not the past, but a parallel reality.  A reality where Loki had not let go on the Bifrost, attacked Midgard, or died on Svartalfheim.  One where the Avengers had not yet been formed, Thor had not been banished, his mother lived, and he had never met Jane.  In fact, Jane did not yet even exist.

The fact was, Thor had neither an idea of how he had come to be there nor when or if he would return.  He was obligated to try, his family and people awaited him…save Loki…his brother would not be waiting for him.  Nor his mother.

Thor lay in ‘his’ bed as he rubbed his palm over his face.  What if he could not return from whence he came?  Or even if he could, would it be so wrong to see this reality settled before he did?  Why should another Frigga and Loki have to die if Thor could spare them?  He could stop the mortal deaths from the Chitauri invasion.  Heimdall would not need to commit treason to assist Thor in freeing Jane of the Aether.  And while Thor did not know full intent of the one who had sent his brother to Midgard, he knew they wanted the Tesseract and had given Loki the scepter.  He had decades before that time would arrived, far more than enough time to circumvent disaster.  Time enough perhaps to right a number of wrongs…

Assuming he did not wake up to find it had all been a dream.

--xx--

The face that greeted Thor in the mirror the next morning confirmed he had not simply been asleep.  That really only left curse or time travel, potentially related to the Aether but that was unconfirmed.  He may be pulled back to his reality at any time or he may be permanently stuck.  Thor did not have an immediate answer to his problem and decided at the very least there could be no great harm in taking a few days to see what came of his situation.  The only issue was Jane on Svartalfheim, or perhaps his body if-well, but he was the body of the Thor of this time…unless his body had been altered…so where then had the other Thor gone?

The logistics of it were far more the purview of his brother and the endless stream interconnected questions was dizzying.  Thor could let the matter lie for the moment, he really didn’t have a choice either way.

“You are up surprisingly early.”

Thor turned at the familiar voice, a little taken aback at the way his own heart flip-flopped to hear it.  Loki, with his slicked back hair, calm expression, and brotherly look of interest.

He could see his own Loki as clearly as if he were before Thor.  The face mottled and lifeless.  This Loki was alive and whole and the painful longing it stirred in him left him nearly breathless.  He had twice experienced his brother’s death and had been at odds with his brother both times.  This Loki was different…though how different, Thor wasn’t sure.

“I never wanted the throne!  I only ever wanted to be your equal!”

“I remember a shadow!"

The echoes of his brother’s enraged voice and his cold one.

“Brother?”

The endearment caught Thor’s attention as he realized Loki had stepped closer with a look between puzzlement and concern.  He had been staring again like a Norns damned fool.  “I could say the same of you.”  Thor replied easily as he drank in the sight of his living, peaceful little brother.

“Father wanted the draft ahead of the meeting and it took more time than I anticipated.”

Thor wasn’t sure what draft Loki referred to.  “When did you start?”

“Not long after we parted.  I would have started sooner had not someone insisted I attend the sparring ring.”  Loki said dryly.

Thor stared.  “You mean to say you did not sleep?"

Loki shrugged.  “No matter.  It had to be done.”

His younger brother had always been a quick wit with the affairs of the court, quick with anything really, but his help proved invaluable to their father when he wanted trusted and efficient assistance.  Thor had lacked for patience and desire to deal with such matters although they would be his when he became king.  He recalled more than one occasion where he had wheedled or nettled his brother into taking care of the documents at the times their father had asked it of Thor.  Loki could be moved by pleading at times, other times by goading his pride.  Which he used depended more on Thor’s mood than on Loki’s and both worked well enough.  Had this been such an occasion?   Where Thor had fobbed his duty off onto Loki, then insisted Loki spar, and then Loki had spent all night doing what should have been Thor’s draft?

The thought sat ill with Thor as he studied his brother.  “Where are you headed?”  he asked.

“To break my fast.”  Loki said with a faint wariness.  “If you mean to ask me to spar again, you may save your breath, Thor.”

The sight was unaccountably endearing and Thor wondered at it.  There was nothing grand in anything he’d said, the hint of teasing was light, if anything Loki was likely a touch annoyed at him.  But the normalcy of it, the simple act of having a conversation with Loki as brothers and not as foes…  Thor had thought that even if he got his brother back, they would never be like this again.  He had even doubted what ‘this’ was because he could not fathom the depth or origin of his brother’s apparently long-standing resentments and bitterness.  Thor had come to see he had not been the man and brother he’d thought himself to be, but nor did he see where Loki had such cause for complaint.

Perhaps now he might try, given that he had the strange opportunity to look with new eyes.  This was not his life, he had lived this before and he knew where it ended.  If Loki saw their shared history so differently, then Thor could make an effort to see why while the chance was before him.

Thor would never have the chance to ask his brother.  This would be the last chance at any understanding of Loki he would likely ever get.

“Mind if I join you?”  Thor asked and he could see the question had come as unexpected to Loki.  Well, for one thing, Thor would usually not have asked even if he would have joined his brother.  Thor knew [or assumed] that he was always welcome in Loki’s company and would thus join or drag his brother as he pleased.   With the thought in mind that Loki was his brother and wanted Thor’s company, it made sense enough to Thor.  But if framed through the possibility that even now Loki harbored enmity towards Thor…if he felt encompassed by a ‘shadow’…then he forced his company on Loki and left him little means of saying ‘no’.

He could say in his defense that at times, he meant well in dragging Loki out.  If he thought Loki had been too reclusive he might ask him out to spar simply to see that his brother got out of his rooms and greeted the sunshine.  Loki would agree at times and protest at others, but if Thor had decided it best, he would ignore Loki’s protests and ‘insist’ as Loki put it.  That was their way, the push-and-pull that had become their relationship in later years.  Thor had seen no harm in it…but had Loki?

“I can hardly stop you.”  Loki replied with an arched brow before he began to walk and Thor took it as somewhat of an invitation as he walked alongside his brother.

“Have you any plans for the day?”  Thor asked and he saw Loki’s eyes narrow.

“What is it?”  Loki asked.

“What?”

“Whatever it is you want.  You need some ‘trick’ of mine, perhaps?  Or you have some quest to pursue?”

The man Thor had been at this age might either have taken offense at what he would perceive as Loki’s snitty attitude, or if he had indeed had want of something might have turned on the big brotherly charm.  The man Thor was, decades later and with a clutch of terrible experiences under his belt along with his Loki’s words in mind, saw differently.  He got an uncomfortable twist in his stomach as Loki seemed to genuinely think that Thor’s invitation to join Loki for breaking their fast must herald Thor wanting something of Loki.  As though it could not be that Thor would simply want to join his little brother.  Was he reading too much into it, or just enough?  How much of Loki should Thor have taken at face value or doubted?

The same face that told Thor never to doubt his love and soothed his anxieties masked a man who knew even at that moment his plan for Thor’s downfall was in motion.  Loki had the look of sincerity and perhaps he had been sincere.  But that meant either that Loki was well suited to his namesake as God of Lies, or that he could sincerely love Thor while acting against him, or both.  Thor wasn’t sure if it was a comfort or not to think the latter true.  A brother who did not love and acted against him, or a brother who loved him and expressed it sincerely while plotting behind his back?

But the question was already answered and had been Thor’s whole life through.  He had loved Loki from the first and the thought that it had been otherwise from Loki to Thor was nearly intolerable.  Thor could not believe that their whole life as Thor remembered it had been a lie, that the brotherhood and love between them had been a lie.

And hadn’t Loki proved that in the end?

“You are right.”  Thor said bluntly and was it his imagination that Loki looked just a tiny bit disappointed?  “I want the pleasure of my brother’s company this morning.”

Loki’s expression was skeptical as side-eyed his brother.  “You need not butter me up, Thor, out with it.  What are you after?”

Thor nearly frowned at that.  “There is nothing, Loki.”

--

Loki was tired and it showed as he examined his reflection ruefully.  He used sorcery to hide the faint bags under his eyes and the weariness in his expression.  Loki had spent the majority of the night working on the draft Thor had badgered him into doing for him again.  He almost didn’t know why he bothered, the temptation to tell his brother off was strong.  But Thor would be displeased or sullen if Loki declined and it would simply cause a fight with their father.  Thor was fairly useless with that sort of paperwork, or at least he never applied himself, and it seemed like rather more a headache to argue about it than to simply do it.  And besides...Thor was often so jolly about it when he got his way.

“What would I do without you, brother?”  Thor asked with a grin as he clasped a hand on his brother’s neck and gave it an affectionate squeeze.

“Drown in paperwork, no doubt.”

”Aye.”  Thor replied with false solemnity.  “It is well the Norns gave me such a clever little brother.”

“You only call me ‘clever’ when it proves useful to you.”  Loki grumbled.

“Nonsense.”  Thor said dismissively.  “You being helpful is simply a bonus, brother."

What did it say about Loki that even that scrap of affection and praise was worth latching onto?  He knew that Thor more or less did mean it.  His brother lacked the calculation or guile [or lack of entitlement] to use such words simply to get his way after the fact.  But he meant them in the moment.  Loki was clever when it suited Thor, and a sly trickster when it didn’t.  Much like with his ‘tricks’, which were desirable when useful and at all other times to be mocked.  He despised himself for the part of him that even hoped it would ever actually matter.  That Thor might actually be grateful for Loki’s assistance beyond a passing compliment, or that Loki could decline without fear of Thor being greatly offended.

“Why not?”  Thor demanded.  “It is easy for you!”

“Father told you to do it!”  Loki snapped back, not in the mood that day to humor his brother.  “It would be easy enough for you too if you ever actually bothered instead of gallivanting about!”

”You have something you wish to say?”  Thor growled as he stepped closer, ever one to press a physical advantage.

“I have already said it.”  Loki said back coolly as he did not wish to back down.

“That I do not spend my days hiding in the library or with books for company does not mean I am ‘gallivanting’.”  Thor repeated the word with distaste.  “Your view is a narrow one, Loki.”

Loki scoffed at that.  His brother was cross that he could not bully his brother into doing his own work, but Loki’s view was the narrow one?

Loki handed the draft off to their father, or rather, to one his attendants.  He knew better than to expect praise from Odin either.  The fact that Thor was not doing his assigned tasks went either unnoticed or was not cared about, so Loki had no room to complain there either.  Loki thought he might break his fast and then get a spot of rest but he caught sight of his brother in the hall and greeted him.  The conversation that followed left him certain his brother wanted something of him; and more than a little bitter.  The way that Thor asked so incredulously if he had not slept.  What did he think would happen?   For all that Thor underestimated his skills at times, he had a miraculous ability to then assume Loki was capable of extraordinary feats.  Such, apparently, as being able to produce several pages worth of well-researched documentation in an instant.

And yet still, whether Thor wanted something of him or not, irked as he was at his brother over the business of the draft…some part of him still was gladdened to receive the little invitation.  To feel as though he were wanted or included.

“Come, brother!”  A young Thor eagerly tugged at his sleeping little brother.

“What, Thor?”  Loki grumbled into his pillow.

“They picked the pumpkins this morning!  There are pumpkin scones in the dining hall!”

Thor loved pumpkin scones as much as Loki loved lemon tarts, but the pumpkin scones were a seasonal treat.  “So?  Go get some.”

“Not without you, brother.”  Thor said as he flopped over his little brother’s stomach and caused the latter to oof .  “I want to eat them with you.”  he poked his brother’s side and Loki yelped as he poked his head up with a glare that melted into a grin as he saw his big brother’s pleading face.

“Fine…but you have to carry me there.”  Loki declared and assumed he could procrastinate that way.  But he yelped as Thor agreed easily and started to try to pick him up.  “I am still in my sleeping clothes!  Brother!”  he shrieked.

“That is fine.”  Thor informed him even as Loki swatted his head.

“Put me down!”  Loki squirmed as his big brother laughed merrily.

Even to reminisce about such times was childish and sentimental, Loki knew better than to indulge in fruitless endeavors.  And yet, for all that he envied his brother’s way of making everyone around him treat him as if Thor were the sun around which all things orbited, Loki did much the same.  Thor had been his only brother and best friend for all of his life.  His older brother whom Loki had followed gladly.  But it was different for Thor, Thor could have his pick of anybody, and it seemed that ‘anybody’ did not so often include Loki these days.  Or if nothing else, Thor simply expected that Loki would be there as one might expect their shadow to be present without even sparing it a glance.

Thor said he wanted nothing so Loki let the matter lie, the oaf would come out with it sooner or later.  “Very well.”

A strange silence followed and Loki wasn’t sure what to make of that either.  Normally Thor had plenty to say, even if only to recount the tale of an exploit that Loki himself had also been on.  But as they entered the dining hall and collected their food, neither brother said a word.

“Thor!”  A shout from Fandral who was seated at a table with Sif already.  Loki saw Fandral’s gaze land on him after with something like surprise as Fandral shouted a greeting to him as well.  Sif’s gaze hadn’t missed Loki at all though as she watched him intently.  His irritation flared beneath the surface as he recalled the events of the day prior.  Her snap judgment and the way they seemed content to keep him from his own brother.  But that was hardly anything abnormal these days, it was never Thor and Loki any longer, the group were attached to Thor whether Loki was present or not.

Loki cursed himself for another flicker of disappointment, it wasn’t as if Thor had invited him for true want of his company anyway.  So there was no reason to be bothered that the rare opportunity to eat alone with his brother had been missed.

Thor and Loki were seated across from Sif and Fandral.  Loki noted again that his brother was strangely reserved.  He paid his greetings and seemed friendly enough, but Thor said little else at first.  Curiously, it seemed to Loki almost as if Thor were observing the pair, but that was a laughable notion.  Perhaps Thor had not slept well either?

“He thought the story a terrific tale.”  Fandral said as he finished his recounting of telling an Alfish warrior of one of their quests.

Loki bit his tongue throughout the telling as his part was [unsurprisingly] mostly left out.  Given that his part involved sorcery, he was well enough used to not receiving notice.

“The trolls in…Lirkshir, was it?”  Thor asked.

“We have not faced any other trolls of late, have we?”  Fandral asked with a chuckle.

“No, but you made no mention of how the trolls were distracted or the fractured bridge repaired.”

Loki stared at his brother in surprise.

“Loki’s sorcery smoothed the way for our quest.”  Thor said, and Loki knew that Thor must have suffered a far greater blow than they’d realized.

Fandral blinked but without missing a beat chuckled good-naturedly.  “So it did!  Quite right.  I was amiss in my telling, I will correct it in the future.”

Loki found himself the recipient of a pleased smile from Thor before Thor returned his focus to his food and it left him utterly baffled.

Sif spoke of an issue with an Asgardian vessel that had been carrying precious trade goods and finished with.  “The port master was cross, but what were our people to have done?”

“They might have checked the ship as protocol demands.  The malfunction would have been discovered in the required preliminary check.”  Loki half-muttered as he speared a piece of melon.

“How could you possibly know that?”  Sif asked in a tone of open disbelief.

“Simple.  I read the incident report just last evening.”  Loki replied casually.

Thor realized whatever draft Loki had been working on must have been related to that.

“How convenient.”  Sif said.

The conversation was ordinary by all accounts, a conversation that Thor would have had little interest in at the time.  A bit of back-and-forth by his brother and friend that would have barely registered.  And yet now, as he looked with the intent to see, he found a tension that Thor had never noticed before.  Sif and Loki had quarreled, they had all quarreled with Loki at some point or other.  But what reason did Sif have to question Loki on his knowledge, or to make commentary on it?  Why did she sound almost…hostile?

“Related to the draft?”  Thor asked.

“The very same.  Truly tedious.  I do not blame you for not wishing to review it yourself.”  Loki said in a perfectly bland tone as he nipped another melon.

But Thor heard what Loki was saying between the lines; it confirmed his concern that it had been a task Thor had been assigned and passed to Loki instead.  The way he phrased it would sound as if Thor had the opportunity to see the document and simply hadn’t, rather than that he had gotten Loki to look over what had been his to review.

Thor was unaccustomed the white hot lump of guilt that sat in his belly at the realization.  He nearly wondered why Loki didn’t out him, why he didn’t take the opportunity to cast a bit of shame Thor’s way for his negligence.  But he knew his friends would not bat an eye, and that was the thing with Loki, wasn’t it?  His brother didn’t complain overtly if he complained at all.  Thor knew full well that Loki’s words would have gone all but unnoticed by Thor, or that he might have chuckled about them.  He would not have taken to heart the jab that Thor should have read the documents.  Thor would not have seen anything amiss in the conversation with Sif.  He would not have felt guilty, and he certainly wouldn’t have set a hand on Loki’s shoulder to say-

“You should blame me, brother.  But I thank you for your help.”  Thor didn’t like the way Loki’s eyes widened a fraction in surprise.

There was no sarcasm, no biting retort, no malicious twist of the lips or cold glare.  This Loki was surprised to be thanked and yet it did not [seem] to inspire a negative response.  Thor could not be sure though, he couldn’t be sure when things had truly started to turn between them.

Loki’s palm abruptly found the side of Thor’s head.  A gesture of familiarity that also seemed significant given the lack of tenderness from his brother that Thor had in past years.  The cool palm lingered a few seconds before Loki declared.  “You are not feverish.  Have you drunk a strange potion?  You know I have warned you about that.”  he said with a familiar frown.

Thor almost laughed, he could not help it.  The little ways that Loki showed his concern were more welcome than Thor could have realized.  Even that familiar frown, the one that a young Loki too would visit upon his errant big brother when he thought Thor was being foolish or deserved his brother’s grumpy ire, was a sight for sore eyes.

Your brother will never look at you that way again.  Thor’s mind reminded him.  The thought was a sobering one and he quickly pushed past the memory of his brother’s visage in Thor’s last glimpse of him.

“I am not ill, brother.”  Thor said as he gave in to a long-repressed instinct and bumped his brother’s shoulder lightly.  “And I know better than to risk your wrath by imbibing potions from anyone else…though, I know better than to take them from you as well.”  he added with a light grin.

Loki stared a split second before his lips curved into a smirk.  “Is that a challenge, brother?  I shall remember that the next time you come to me pleading for an antidote to the drinking sickness.”

“And I’ll remember that you said that.”  Thor muttered intentionally, pleased when Loki’s eyes sparkled with amusement.  Norns, when was the last time Loki had worn such an expression?  When was the last time Thor had inspired humor rather than rage in his brother?

The conversation from there was mild enough.  Fandral and Sif were pleasant enough though the initial interaction gave Thor food for thought.  When it had finished, Fandral asked what plans the brothers had for the day.  Loki mentioned a book of interest to him, rather than to say that he intended to sleep awhile.  Thor realized that likely meant he would not see Loki until later.  He knew that Fandral and Sif would likely wish to accompany Thor so he gave an excuse that would not allow that  and said he needed to speak to his father.  His brother shot him a curious look that Thor pretended not to see.  When they parted ways, Thor intended to at least glance at what the library had to offer and see what he might glean from that.

“Enjoy your book, brother.”  Thor said as he clapped Loki on the back.  His brother lingered even as Sif and Fandral had left and Loki seemed to be expecting something.

Loki waited for whatever request had enticed Thor to have them break their fast together, but none was forthcoming, and instead Thor encouraged him to enjoy his book.  That in itself was an oddity.  “What a relief that I have your encouragement in the matter.  I could scarcely have enjoyed it otherwise.”  he said with mock-relief, surprised when Thor grinned at his slightly sarcastic jest.  His brother must be in a rather good mood then, perhaps that explained his behavior?  But if that was the case, Loki wondered at the cause.

“As I suspected.”  Thor said gravely despite his grin and at the little smile he saw quirk Loki’s lips, a rush of fondness filled his chest.  He couldn’t resist as he reached out to ruffle lightly at Loki’s hair, only to earn what amounted to an indignant squawk from his brother.

“Thor!”

The voice of a little brother before his insufferable big brother.  A brother who did not look Thor in the eyes and let go on the Bifrost, or drop him in a glass prison from a Helicarrier smugly.  A Loki who was still his bro-

The thought crushed his good feelings like a leaden weight.  His Loki had been his brother.  For all the bad between them, Loki had ever been his brother and in the end…he had saved Thor at the cost of his own life.  He suddenly felt ashamed of the eagerness with which he interacted with the other Loki.  His brother died to save him and here he was taking advantage of the ignorance of another Loki.  He was reaping the benefits of hindsight in a reality where Thor had not so devastatingly erred.

And yet, this Loki was also a Loki, he was real and present.  He still had a chance and if Thor was to be stuck here [or even if the other Thor would come back] could it be considered loyal to try to do right by this Loki?  For Thor to ignore him out of loyalty to his own brother’s memory would be a mess.  He would all but ensure this Loki’s downfall.  But if he made the effort…Thor might be able to help this Loki and also truly understand what went wrong between he and his own.

Loki brushed past him in a huff with a muttered gripe and Thor watched him go with a pang in his chest.

He had remembered moments like these after Loki’s fall, and during Loki’s time in his cell.  Well, Thor had always remembered, but mostly keenly in those periods.  Thor would walk the palace halls and be reminded of centuries of brotherhood at every turn.  The tiny gestures and banter that had been hallmarks of their brotherhood gained a new importance.  The simple freedom to ruffle his little brother’s hair or remind each other of a shared jest.  Even to meet his brother’s gaze and see no fury in it, to greet his brother and be greeted as a brother.

“Now you see me, brother.”

Over and over, Loki had used the endearment and Thor suspected it was Loki’s attempt to goad him.  What else was he to think?  Or had he simply convinced himself of that because the other option might be that Loki was hoping Thor would say it back?  Because Loki had hoped that Thor might visit him in the cells and that he hadn’t been abandoned.  But did Loki think it was easy?  Did he think it caused Thor no pain when Loki rejected his attempts to offer aid or when Loki denied their kinship?

Didn’t you make him feel rejected first?

Thor was unaccustomed to the thought but once it settled in his mind, it lingered like an uncomfortable truth.

He had told his brother that fateful day in Jotunheim to ‘know his place’.  It must have been especially hurtful to Loki who believed the place Thor intended him to occupy was Thor’s own shadow.

“I wish I could trust you.”  Thor had told Loki on the skiff.  But he might well have added, ‘I wish you could have trusted me too’.

I am sorry, brother.  Thor thought with his own Loki in mind.  I am sorry.

--xx--

The next morning, Thor went to see his mother.  Although he could not share his circumstances with her, to see her alive and well was too tempting a prospect.  He found her weaving and could not help but smile.

“My son.”  Frigga greeted him warmly after an attendant had led Thor to one her inner chambers.  “Pleasant morn to you.”

“And you, Mother.”  he said as bent to press a kiss to her head and catch the faint, familiar whiff of his mother’s favored scent distilled from the morrow-wood flowers of Vanaheim.  “What are you making?”

“A simple tapestry.”  Frigga said thoughtfully as she brushed a hand over the colorful weaving in progress.  “I had thought to make a gift of it to my sister.”

“There can be no gift greater than a tapestry by your hand.”  Thor said, almost solemnly.

A twinkle of mischief came to his mother’s eyes, so reminiscent of Loki that Thor wondered how they could not be blood-related.  “You flatter me, dear heart.  What are you after?”

“Why does every one assume I pay compliments only to receive favors?”  Thor protested.

Frigga lifted a brow.  “I can only assume you mean your brother.”  The quirk of Thor’s expression was a silent acquiescence and she chuckled.  “You are sparing in your praise.”  she said lightly.  “But that does make it all the more valuable when you choose to give it.”

Thor wasn’t sure if there was a scold in the words or that his mother was simply pointing out a fact.  Was he sparing in praise?  He tried to recall the last earnest praise he had given.  Thor found that nothing came to mind, not even with Jane for all that her cleverness impressed him and reminded him of his brother.  He recalled moments where he’d been caught off guard by something she had done but come to think of it, Thor did not remember letting the praise extend beyond his thoughts.  But even still, he had never thought himself sparing, no one went around simply praising others all the time.

But it seems I have not been giving praise at all.  Thor realized even as he knew that he held expectation to receive it himself, it was even tiresome at times.  Either because it felt like cloying, false flattery or because it had been heard so many times as to be mundane.  Thor praised for his quests, his ‘skill’ with Mjolnir, the awe of his lightning…he was jaded on a glut of praise having received it all his life.  But Loki would not have any idea what that felt like, would he?  Did he know Thor felt such a way?  A memory struck him so suddenly it turned his stomach.

“If I must hear one more compliment on my golden looks or brilliant cloak I will go mad.”  Thor complained as he chugged from a mug of ale and hid a scowl at the party before them.

“Oh, dear.”  Loki said dryly.  “Must be terribly burdensome, being so desired.”

Thor scoffed.  “It is always the same, the same words, the same flattery.  If they would praise me, let it be for my great deeds!  Only last week I slayed that rogue minotaur-”

“-Not without help.”  Loki muttered.

“Yes, brother.”  Thor patted Loki on the back with a faint roll of his eyes as he took another swig.  “I remember you were there.  But it was I who slayed the creature.”

Thor realized he could not recall his brother’s expression as he had barely paid his brother a glance.  It was one of the rare occasions in their later years where the brothers had quested alone.  In truth of fact, the minotaur nearly cleaved his axe to Thor’s skull before Loki conjured a distracted and shoved his brother away with sorcery.  Yes, Thor had dealt the killing blow, but he was perhaps only alive to do so because Loki had saved him first.

Thor was also unaccustomed to feeling shame, he tried not to take actions he would regret or if he should have, he hadn’t because Thor didn’t reflect on them.  But he was not the man he’d been before his coronation, not the vainglorious boy of his youth.  He could not say he was tempered of all of his arrogance but he wasn’t blind to his own faults as he’d once been.  And Loki had served as powerful motivation to take a hard look at himself.  His little brother had looked him in the eyes and chosen death on the Bifrost.  He had chosen to fight against Thor and their family.  And yet then had died to save Thor.

The memory stirred a feeling of shame alongside of the disheartening recognition of the fact it was far too late.  Any epiphanies he made in this reality came far too late, his Loki had died perhaps thinking Thor thought little of him, that Thor had not even wanted to call him ‘brother’.

“I think it needs something here.”  Frigga said, again thoughtful as she trailed her fingertips over the weaving.  “What do you think?”

Thor cast an absent glance at the tapestry and said quietly.  “More green.”

Frigga smiled softly at the reply.  “I think you may be right, dear heart.”  she looked to Thor then as she stared at him knowingly.  “Something troubles you.”

A confession lay on the tip of Thor’s tongue.  He wanted badly to confide in his mother, to ask her help and advice, to speak of how wrongly things had gone in his own reality.

But he couldn’t, so instead he braced his palm against his mother’s shoulder as he pressed a lingering kiss to the crown of her head.  Her hand in turn rested against his side.  “Only that I have missed you, Mother.”  Thor said, which was not a lie.

Frigga’s free hand came up to Thor’s hair which she carded her fingers through lovingly.  “My sweet boy.”  she said warmly.

“Boy.”  Thor repeated with a snort as he pulled back and Frigga’s hand lingered on his forearm.

“You may both live thousands of years and yet will always be my precious boys.”  Frigga informed him.  “Such is a mother’s prerogative.”

A lump formed in Thor’s throat and it was all he could do not to pull his mother into his arms.  “Far be it from me to deny you then.”  he said softly.  Frigga gave his arm a squeeze before she released him and as Thor glanced at her weaving, he realized there were white trees of Vanaheim in it.

“Do you miss it?”  Thor asked, a question which had not occurred to him to ask before.  “Vanaheim?”

Frigga seemed surprised by the question as she trailed her own eyes over what she’d crafted.  “Sometimes.  It is strange, the things we miss.  I miss my family, of course.  There is a great nostalgia to the childhood I had there.  But it is the little things in some ways I miss the most.  The scent of the citrus trees in summer wafting through my window.  The laughs of my sisters as we snuck out to dance in my mother’s garden.  The simple pleasure of looking out at the Whitewoods from my balcony.  There is much I took for granted without knowing how dear I would find it in its absence.”  Frigga noted, a touch wistfully.

“Brother, look!”  A young Loki said excitedly as his palms glowed green and he showed his big brother a tiny conjuration, one of the few spells he had started to master.

Thor was awed and made to poke at it, only for Loki to dispel it with a grin.  “Do it again!”

“Should I?”  Loki drawled, but Thor knew perfectly well his little brother was thrilled to be asked.

Thor humored him.  “Do it again, please, brother!”

Loki’s answering beam was reward enough as he did the spell again and Thor slung a happy arm around his grinning brother’s shoulders.

“I know what you mean.”  Thor murmured as he clenched his hands, not his hands, because his hands had held his brother’s body in his last moments.  His hands had been useless when Loki let go to drift into the void.  These hands knew only pride.

“Are you sure you are well, Thor?”  Frigga asked with concern as she studied Thor’s face.  “You do not seem yourself.”

Thor wondered what it said of him that his behavior, casual in his opinion, kept inspiring such puzzled reactions in those around him.  “All well, Mother.”  he assured her.  “Tired, perhaps.”

“You are not sleeping well?  Have you had poor dreams?”

Kurse’s blade plunged through Loki’s chest-

“No.”  Thor lied.  “What nightmares would dare to trouble me?”  he said with a tone of put-upon haughtiness, though playful, and his mother smiled although Thor had the sense she wasn’t fooled.

“I will have a sleeping drought sent to your room tonight.”  she said, in a tone that brooked no argument.

It was among the sweetest sounds Thor could hope to hear.

“Yes, mother.”  Thor agreed and lingered for a time before parting ways.  Among the things he had missed unwittingly was simply to be in attendance as his mother worked.  Her face etched in peaceful concentration while her fingers moved deftly over thread.

Better still were the times he and Loki sat before her loom together, at play or rest with each other with their mother’s fond gaze over them.

--

Thor next took himself to a part of the castle he only ever frequented in search of his brother: the library.  He supposed then he should not have been surprised to receive the greeting he did.

“Prince Thor.”  The librarian bowed appropriately.  “Prince Loki is not here at present.”

“I am not here for my brother.  I am looking for any texts regarding…the Aether.”

The librarian seemed taken aback, for more reasons than one Thor supposed, his search for a book not least among them.  “You seek the histories?  The great war in Svartalfheim, or perhaps King Bor’s-”

“-The Aether, specifically.”  Thor interrupted.  “We must have something.”

“Only as pertains to the war, your highness.  As you no doubt know, Malekith intended to use it to leave only dark elves in existence in the realms.  Your grandfather, King Bor, defeated him and the Aether has been sealed for thousands of years since.”

“Surely we know more than that?”  Thor asked with a hint of frustration.

“There was not time to study the Aether before it was sealed.  The power was too great and King Bor knew wisely the temptation of such a power.”

Thor made a noise of irritation as he sighed.  He had not expected much, but he had hoped for more than that.  “What of tomes on curses?”

“Curses, your highness?”  The librarian seemed even more surprised.  “You…you wish to cast a curse?”

Some sliver of old habit flared up in him, it urged his tongue to speak with affront at the implication that he would wield sorcery-dark sorcery-in particular.  But that was easily quashed, Thor knew better in that at least, little that his brother would ever believe it after so long of Thor’s taunts.  “I believe a friend of mine may be suffering a curse.”  he said instead.  “I wish to better understand what that may entail.”

The librarian’s eyes widened.  “With all due respect, Prince Thor, such a matter is one of urgency.  Perhaps the Allfather or-”

“-I have the matter in hand.”  Thor interrupted again, this time as his temper spiked.  “Do we have such books or not?”

The librarian seemed troubled but after a moment inclined his head.  “This way, your highness.”

Thor, in short order, found himself with four thick books on curse-theory.  The size of the voluminous texts made him scrunch his nose but with a sigh, he settled in to see what he could make of them.

An hour into his task, Thor was restless and all too readily recalling why study drove him half-mad.  The longer he read, the more the words seemed to blend together on the pages and he had too little magical theory to draw on to understand all the principles the book assumed the reader would know.  Thor squinted down at a particularly verbose sentence when a hand on his shoulder actually startled him.  He looked up to find Loki peering at his book curiously and [not suspiciously at all] Thor slammed the book closed.  “Loki.  Fancy seeing you here.”  Oh, yes, because that was any less conspicuous.

“Still, we can be less conspicuous.”  Thor pushed the little flash of memory from his mind.

Loki seemed surprised and frowned.  “If one of us should be surprised to find the other in the library, I dare say it should be me.  What sort of mess have you found yourself in?  Out with it.”

It took Thor a moment to realize Loki thought Thor had fallen prey to some curse and presumably that Thor was trying to fix it on his own.  He found he nearly smiled again at his brother’s almost bossy tone.  Loki could be quite the authoritarian when it came to such matters.  He took a personal offense to the notion that Thor should let himself be influenced by any magic not Loki’s own.  And it was Loki’s way of being protective, Thor knew, in the area in which Loki held the expertise.  “No mess.  I simply felt like reading.”

“You felt like reading.”  Skepticism dripped from every word.

“Did you need something, brother?”

Loki’s eyes narrowed.  “And now you are trying to change the subject.”

“Of course I’m not.  If I were cursed, you would be the first person I would come to.  You know that.”

“Unless, of course, you did something terribly foolish and are reluctant to admit it.”  Loki said with an arched brow.  He waved a hand pointedly over Thor as it illuminated with green sorcery and for a moment, Thor felt his breath catch as he wondered if Loki would see the difference.  That he was not the Thor that Loki expected.  But with a faintly furrowed brow, Loki hummed as he found nothing.  “Well, I do not sense strange sorcery on you.”

“Because there is none.”  Thor said smoothly as he rose with what he hoped was a reassuring smile as he clapped his brother’s shoulder.  “Now, did you have need of me?”

Loki still seemed suspicious but slowly nodded.  “Father has summoned us both to the Vault.”

“To the Vault?”  Thor repeated with puzzlement.  “Why should he-”  And then Thor knew what was coming and he couldn’t quite believe that of all times to land in, it had been now.

“What is it?”  Loki asked.

“Perhaps he is still troubled about yesterday.”  Thor tried to cover and Loki only looked more suspicious if possible.

“You know something.”  Loki accused.

“Only that we should not keep Father waiting.  Come, brother.”  he steered Loki away from his table of curse research materials.

“You are behaving strangely.”  Loki said as he side-eyed his brother.

“You are mistaken.”  Thor replied affably.  “You remain the strange one between us.”  he said, and meant nothing by it, but he saw Loki’s expression grow tight before he looked away.  He tried to soften whatever ill-meaning Loki took from it by resting his palm on the back of his brother’s neck with a fond squeeze.  Loki’s expression softened into a look between confusion and surprise.  “And I suppose you would say I remain the ‘oaf’.”

Loki’s lips twitched.  “I thought it went without saying.”

Thor grinned, Loki smiled back, and Thor missed his brother terribly.

And he knew what was coming in the Vault.

--

Odin stood with Gungnir dressed in fairly formal garb with a sober expression.  “My sons.”  he greeted them and they returned it, Loki somewhat anxiously and Thor with a sense of knowing.  “Today is one that has been long in coming, a day I too was faced with alongside of my brothers.”

Loki had not known precisely what their father intended with the summons, but he had a guess.  What riled him was that when he made mention of the summons, Thor grew notably restless.  He knew what was coming, not simply had guessed, but knew.  Did that mean that Father had told Thor his decision ahead of time?  There was only reason Loki could think that the pair would be summoned to the Vault now and it was to hand over heirship.  Odin was going to name a crown prince.  And while any with a half a wit would guess with certainty it would be Thor, his brother seemed to know.  Why then this formality?  Just to rub in it?  

Although their father had once told them they were both born to be kings, and Loki harbored some tiny childhood idea that it could truly be him who gained the throne…he had long since abandoned the notion or the desire.  While he would like a taste of the accolades and adulation that seemed to cling to Thor like a heavy musk, Loki knew what would happen were he to sit on the throne.  Loki was already constantly compared to and found lacking in comparison to his brother.  If by some quirk of fate Loki were to succeed the throne, Asgard would fall to sheer displeasure.  And the more he grew to learn of himself the more he realized that however well he might rule, Loki did not particularly want to.  Loki enjoyed his freedoms and the ability to pursue his own interests, even in solitude.  But with an ever-burning if well-concealed passion, Loki wanted to be the equal of his brother.  Loki wanted to be worthy.  He wanted Thor to acknowledge it, along with their father and the rest of Asgard and the realms.  Loki was not lesser, not a spare, he was Loki of Asgard and he was not to be trifled with.

But he was also Loki the trickster, the Liesmith, and he would never bear the throne.  He knew it well, and Thor’s pretense that he ever imagined it would be otherwise was grating.

“You have both become talented men in your right.  Princes and sons who give your mother and I great pride.”

Loki both found the words desperately heady and also tried to distance himself with the thought that they were simply platitudes to soften the blow impending.

“There is no equal to your sorcery in our realm, Loki.  You have a clever mind and quick wit that does our kingdom justice.”

“Thank you, Father.”  Loki murmured.

“And you, Thor, are the strongest warrior of our realm.  You do not shy to help those who need it and you do not yield before fear or daunting odds.”

Thor thought of Jotunheim, where in his pride and arrogance he got himself banished and nearly started a war because he would not yield.  “Thank you, Father.”  he said dutifully, and without the pleasure he first took from the words decades ago.  He had not been ready to rule but Odin had not seen it and Thor couldn’t imagine why.  Loki had, and the more he knew of Loki the more he had come to see that Odin and Loki had minds uncannily similar.  In this too, Thor struggled to imagine that Loki was not of Odin’s blood and flesh, they were so alike in a way that Thor never would be.

“Either one of you would bring honor and glory to the realm upon the throne.  You are both men of courage, and of kindness, and have brought me pride as both father and king.  But only one of you may sit the throne as heir.  The decision has not come without great thought and deliberation, and not because either of you is lacking to the other.  You each have your own strengths, you balance each other in a way that only brothers can.  And so I trust that you will continue to in the length of your lives together.  To who will be my heir, I name you, Thor.”

Thor heard a slight exhalation of breath and realized Loki had been holding his.  A fact he had missed the first time around over his own glee and ill-concealed grin.  The pounding of his blood in his ears with the excitement of the moment.  Thor had been thrilled his father deemed him worthy but in truth, childishly, the greatest excitement for Thor had been the knowledge of what he would receive.  The object of his admiration and desire for as long as he could remember: Mjolnir.

Odin gestured to the stand where Mjolnir lay waiting.  “Mjolnir is the weapon of a king, and she is now yours to wield, my son.”

Thor cast his brother a glance and found that Loki’s eyes were firmly fixed on Mjolnir.  When he caught Thor’s gaze, Loki stretched a tight smile across his lips that Thor uneasily made himself return.  What had Loki thought in this moment?  Thor had not truly bothered to care then.  He had been too eager, too pleased with himself to spare a thought for his brother’s feelings.

What had he done?

Thor tried and failed to repress the grin that formed on his lips.  His veins thrummed with excitement and exhilaration.  His father had named him heir!  Thor would one day be king and Allfather of the realms but what most enthralled him was the hammer that lay behind his father.  The weapon he dreamed all of his life of wielding.  His father gave the invitation and Thor stepped forward eagerly as he gripped her hilt.  Mjolnir’s power hummed inside of him, it seemed to sing inside of him, and he felt an instant connection to the ancient weapon.  He lifted her as his lightning sparked briefly in his eyes, unseen by his father and brother as thunder boomed outside.

Odin set a hand on his son’s shoulder.  “This weapon and the title of crown prince carry great responsibilities, Thor.  Do not take them lightly.”

“I will not, Father.”  Thor said proudly.

But he had.  Thor had in many ways failed himself and in so doing, failed those around him.  And it had cost them all dearly.

“I could have done it, Father!   For you, for all of us!”

“No, Loki.”

A shudder went down Thor’s spine as he recalled his brother’s lifeless eyes as he let go.  The own manic, clawing desperation and visceral pain as he watched his little brother and life’s companion float away to ‘certain’ death.  Thor had not saved him, and Loki had not held on.  And Thor carried blame towards both.

“Congratulations, brother.”  Loki said with all appearance of brotherly sincerity.  “You will make a fine king.”

Thor looked to his brother and wondered if even at that moment Loki’s thoughts were the opposite.  If even then he thought Thor would bring ruin to the realms, a witless oaf.  He wanted to say something to reassure his brother or to comfort him, but he could think of nothing that would make sense in the moment.  Not to this Loki who expected Thor to be oblivious and prideful.  Who knew nothing of their shared future to come.  What had he done in this moment?

Thor left the Vault with Loki at his side and a broad grin as Odin left to speak with their mother.  A banquet would be held to announce Thor as heir that very night, one that had been planned under pretense of a solstice gathering.  He spun Mjolnir in his hands and bumped his brother’s shoulder with such force that Loki stumbled.  “Mjolnir is mine at last!”  Thor said gleefully.  “I cannot wait to try her.”

“You seem more excited for the hammer than the throne.”  Loki noted as he righted himself.

“Father will reign for centuries more.  But Mjolnir…”  he tossed her high and caught her with relish.  “We must show our friends.  I cannot wait for the banquet.”

“Father said not to speak of it until-”

“-They are trustworthy, Loki.”  Thor chided as he interrupted.  “This is my day of celebration.  Would you deny me my moment?”  he said, a touch annoyed that his little brother chose this moment to pretend he didn’t bend the rules ever chance he got.

“Of course not, brother.  Neither this nor any other.”

Thor grinned again and flexed Mjolnir, oblivious to his brother’s mood or double meaning.

Thor had many, many ‘moments’, and he had made Loki party to most of them.  But how many such ‘moments’ had Loki ever had?  Thor had been chosen and instead of being a good sport about it, instead of offering his brother kind words, he had all but rubbed it in Loki’s face.

No wonder his brother so often wished to stab him.

“The banquet planned for this evening will be used to announce my decision.  Speak not of this until then.  Do not make a show of wielding Mjolnir.”  Odin warned.

“Of course not, Father.”  Thor flashed Odin a brilliant grin.

“Understood, Father.”  Thor said this time with a serious expression.

Odin parted to seek their mother and the brothers left the Vault.  Thor felt a restless flutter as he knew he should say something to his brother.  That this moment was important.  Loki felt that Thor was favored of Odin, and Thor had never thought so and never would have attributed this moment to Loki’s tally of slights in that regard.  But perhaps his brother had.  Loki had perhaps seen in this moment another indicator that Thor was the golden son and Loki the afterthought.  Instead of a decision of their king, perhaps he saw their father’s disapproval of him in it.

“Loki.”  Thor blurted before he’d readied his tongue and he cursed to himself.  Words were his brother’s forte, when he expressed sentiment it was in physical gesture.  He trusted the other person to understand his meaning but if Thor had learned anything of his brother it was to never assume that Loki understood what Thor meant.  Loki paused and Thor saw nothing in his expression.  No hint of shadows or anger, no resentment or bitterness, his expression was pleasant if curious.  Thor would have believed it then.  Now, he had no idea what Loki truly felt.

Thor wanted a concise, witty way to tell his brother that Loki was his equal.  That their father loved them both and that Loki in all honesty understood rule better than Thor ever would, for all his later grave imbalance.  Thor wanted Loki to understand that Thor loved his brother dearly, thought the world of him and wanted them to fight side by side forever.  He wanted Loki to be in doubt when the revelation of his parentage came that they were and always would be brothers.  Thor would die for his brother if need be,  as his has died for him.  The thought put a pain in his chest at the reminder that this was not his Loki and yet…Thor wanted to make things right somehow, even if only to the Loki that was before his eyes.  He wanted to speak any number of those sentiments with some kind of eloquence.  But what he said was.

“It could have been you.”

Damn.

“I beg your pardon?”  Loki asked in a polite tone, but his gaze had sharpened.

Thor fumbled to recover, he had ascribed much weight to the moment and his need to speak well and it threw him off.  He did not often give so much thought before he spoke [a fact Loki had scolded and mocked him for many a time].  “You would be a fine king too.”  he said, and realized he had only repeated Loki’s own words back to him.  Whether for that, or that Loki wouldn’t have accepted any praise in this regard, Thor saw Loki’s lips press into a thin line.

“All of Asgard knew it would be you, Thor.  Myself included.  Your pity is unnecessary.”  he started to turn and Thor caught his shoulder in with his free hand.

“It isn’t pity, Loki.”  Thor said, and wondered what words would reach his silver-tongued little brother.  “I am being sincere.”

“You are incapable of sincerity.”  Thor said.

The echo of that particular moment sat ill in Thor’s stomach when faced with this one.

“Most gracious of you then, brother.”  Loki said as he moved away from Thor’s hand.  “But if we are to have a grand celebration tonight, I best start preparing now.  I recommend you do the same.  We cannot have the future king of Asgard showing up disheveled, can we?”

Loki had not parted his company so quickly the first time around and Thor wasn’t sure what to make of it.  He also knew that his words had done no good with Loki and perhaps had done worse.  Thor wanted to object but spouting any further sentiment at Loki would land poorly and Thor knew it.  “Will you enter with me?”  he asked instead.

Loki paused and Thor saw the faintest furrow of his brother’s brow.  “I do not think that wise.  At any rate, I doubt Father will make the announcement until after the banquet has started.  So I am afraid you will not have a grand entrance regardless.  No more so than usual.”

Thor realized his brother was right, Odin hadn’t announced it until it was underway.  He had only thought that if he was to enter to fanfare he wanted his brother beside him.  As his equal and partner.  “I…will see you in the hall then.”

Loki gave his brother an odd look then inclined his head.  “Try not to be late for your own party, brother.”  he said wryly before he walked away.

When his back was turned to Thor and he was alone, he teleported to his own room where he slumped with his back against a wall.  He had known it was coming but now it was actually here.  Thor was to be heir, Thor was to be king, and Loki would forever be in his brother’s shadow.  He wasn’t sure where Thor’s sudden fount of pity came from, Loki had expected Thor to be nothing but enthusiastic.  As if Thor ever believed Loki had a fighting chance, as if he hadn’t waited his whole life to receive Mjolnir.  And then the business of entering with him…  For what purpose?  So that Loki could trail behind while Thor came in with Mjolnir held high?  So that he could witness first hand as usual as the kingdom cheered Thor and spared no thought for Loki?  The only thing that made the blow slightly less was that he knew the oaf wasn’t being intentionally cruel.  Thor wasn’t trying to rub it in, he simply had the emotional sensitivity of a rock and was quite wretched at considering the perspectives of others.  Loki’s most of all.

--

Thor went straight to his room with Mjolnir, he had no desire to be caught with the heir’s weapon and start the mess that would come with it.  He tried to recall how the banquet had gone.  Thor had already caused the announcement to be spread by brandishing Mjolnir all about the palace and telling his friends.  Loki had left his side at some point and Thor had not given it a second thought.  He recalled staying up late and drinking to excess and hardly putting Mjolnir down.

Like a child with a new toy.  Thor thought with a heavy sigh.  And while Loki had slipped away before hand, he was both expected to remain at the banquet and somewhat forced.  If Loki tried to leave the table, Thor would drag his brother back down and needle him.  He had, in his own way, simply wanted his brother with him for such a monumental night.  But what had Loki thought?

Streams of people came to congratulate and praise Thor with Loki at his side.  And while none of the comments were necessarily pointed towards Loki, some very much had the implication that the ‘right prince’ was chosen.  Not in those exact words but perhaps close enough.  And Thor made Loki sit through all of it while Thor grinned and gloated and drank the night through.

Thor rubbed a palm over his face and wondered if this was what it was like to be Loki.  To always be looking over situations and conversations to see a different meaning or intent in them.  Thor had reminisced at times or gone over certain poor situations in his head, he played with ‘what ifs’ at times.  But overwhelming he left the past to the past.  He didn’t look for hidden meanings or motives.  Thor had taken people at face value, something that Loki had also scolded him for.  Thor would laugh and say his brother was too cynical, or that he would leave the liars to his brother then as they had ‘so much in common’.

His brother was the God of Mischief, Lies, and Chaos!  The jest was a fair one, and yet…and yet…how many times had Loki seen it as a slur instead?  No wonder Loki was so bitter and angry, Thor found it exhausting to second guess the moments of his life as he lived them.  Had Loki never known peace, did his brother never stop analyzing and ruminating?

“Thooor.”  Loki lay sprawled dramatically over his big brother’s lap on Thor’s bed, he was a slip of a boy.  “I am bored.”  he declared.

Thor smirked down at his brother as he pinched his noise and Loki made an indignant noise as he swatted his brother’s hand.  “What do you want me to do about it?”

“Take me outside.”  Loki ordered and Thor laughed.

“To do what?”

“We could play hiding and seeking.”  Loki offered.  “Or go and see if the tadpoles are frogs now.”

Thor grinned, his little brother’s interest in frogs had never failed to be adorable.  He remembered Loki as an insistent toddler nearly breathless with excitement for Thor to take him to see them.  “I would, brother.  But a bilgesnipe has me trapped on my bed.  He has green eyes and is very ticklish-” he clamped his hands on Loki’s rib cage and his brother shrieked.  Loki clambered to get away but Thor snatched his brother into his arms, Loki’s back against his chest, as he made growling noises and mouthed at Loki’s neck playfully.  The younger Odinson squirmed and protested through laughter until Loki’s elbow caught Thor’s side.

Thor abruptly fell limp as he released Loki who paused to regard his ‘fallen’ brother.  The elder cracked his eye open to a slit as he said with his mouth barely moving.  “The bilgesnipe has slain me.”

“Brother.”  Loki complained as he pushed at Thor.  “Come on!”

Thor lolled his tongue out of his mouth with a dramatic wheeze as he splayed his arms out, only to double over as Loki more or less dropped his knees onto Thor’s stomach.  “L-Loki!”  he spluttered as he snatched at his imp of a little brother.

Loki grinned and scooted off the bed with a challenging pose.  “Catch me, if you think you can, brother!”

Thor eyed his brother just long enough to make Loki wondered before he darted off the bed after his brother who yelped and raced out the door and down the hall, a laughing Thor hot on his heels while Loki grinned with excitement.

The echoes of the gleeful boy his brother was ran alongside the dead-eyed and furious man his brother had become.

The image of that boy, instead of the man, dangling over the abyss formed in Thor’s mind.  Himself a boy again with Loki looking up at him pleadingly instead of blankly, Loki calling for his brother instead of falling in silence.

Loki, with sightless eyes in amidst the dust of Svartalfheim, lifeless in Thor’s arms.

The longing Thor felt for his brother was intense and painful.  He missed his brother in ways he could never admit to nor find the words to.  Loki of his own time would have laughed at him, scorned him, mocked him for his sentiment before finding a way to plunge a dagger in his ribs.

“Now you see me, brother.”

”Did she suffer?”

Or would he have?  Was that just an excuse to avoid another painful attempt and the rejection it might bring?  Thor had tried though, over and over again.  Loki had killed him with the Destroyer and shown no remorse for it.  Had dropped him from the Helicarrier, stabbed him when Thor offered a hand, had killed the son of Coul, taken many mortal lives to conquer Midgard and for what?  Simply to spite Thor?

But who gave Loki the Tesseract and the Chitauri?  Where was Loki the year that he was missing from Heimdall’s sight and who would have such power as to hide him?  Why did Loki seem…injured, tired and weary in a way that a god should not?

Loki couldn’t give him the answers now, whether or not he ever would have.

He hadn’t even been allowed to go to their mother’s funeral.

Thor would have been furious, blind with rage and grief, but Loki had no champion or outlet.  He could not even plead his case because nether Odin nor Thor had gone to see Loki.  Their mother would have wanted Loki there, but Odin had not offered nor had Thor made a case for it even as he felt his brother’s absence from his side keenly through the whole funeral.  Jane had been there but Loki had not.

“I did not come here to share in our grief.”  Thor had said, before lying that he would kill Loki if Loki betrayed him.  He felt justified in some ways and horrendously guilty in others.  His reasons for keeping distance from Loki and mistrusting him were sound, Loki himself agreed he wouldn’t trust Loki in Thor’s place.  But justifications didn’t make Thor feel any better about it, it didn’t feel like vindication, it simply felt weary as another burden or responsibility to bear.

“You will be Allfather to the Nine Realms, Thor.  And that must come before all else for you, even your own sons."

“Does that give you comfort?”  Thor couldn’t stop the bitterness that crept into his voice.  He still had not forgiven his father for the secrets.  For teaching Thor to despise the race his own brother came from right before his brother’s eyes, to say nothing of teaching Loki to hate himself before he’d even known himself.

“My feelings are irrelevant.  If you must know, then no.  I take no comfort in it.  It does not bring me comfort or pleasure that my youngest son will spend his days in a cell.  But as Allfather, I do what I must and not always what I wish.”

”So if you were not Allfather, you would have chosen differently?”

“You will not last a century on this throne if you let yourself fall to thinking of what you would do were you not upon it.  You will be Allfather before you are anything else.  And that is how you must think, and rule, and act.  Even if the man beneath the title finds it unbearable.”

“...And what if the Allfather is wrong, and the man would be right?”

Odin stared at his son a long moment before he asked.  “The Realms called for Loki’s head.  In truth, for what he has done, what he is capable of, it is the sentence that he should have been given.  Instead he lives.  Take from that what you will.”

Odin said it was Frigga’s doing that Loki had been shown mercy, although Thor had spoken against execution as well.  He thought Frigga had talked Odin out of execution over imprisonment and Thor couldn’t believe his father had no reaction to talk of sentencing his own son to death.  But if he understood what Odin was saying, in his own veiled way and despite what he said about thinking as an Allfather…imprisoning Loki was the mercy that Odin could extend.  Beneath the guise of the queen’s mercy.  Odin could not be seen to favor his son or go lightly on him, not with the eyes of the Realms on them.  Any realm that knew what Loki had done would see him dead.  Loki had tried to destroy one realm with the Bifrost and invaded another, to say nothing of those who knew what Loki had done to Thor with the Destroyer.  Either offense was punishable by death and Loki had done two publicly, though Thor’s death was not on Loki’s list of charges, only that he sent the Destroyer to Midgard for hostile purpose.

Thor had seen that in his own way, their father had given Loki what mercy he could.  But what Thor took from it as well was that he was less suited for the throne than he’d realized.  Because while Thor could do his duty up to a point, while he could drag his errant brother back to Asgard to face justice.  He did not imagine he could spend thousands of years on that throne wearing a mask and balancing how much humanity he could or could not show.  Thor did not want a position that came with the inherent duty to place even his own children second.  He was confident that if Loki had not been the one on trial, had he been of sound mind, that he likely would have agreed with Odin or even argued for the execution of one so dangerous.

Would he have argued for or against Thor if he were in Loki’s position?  He liked to think that even at his most resentful, Loki would not have truly wanted him dead and his last act seemed to prove that but…could Thor say that with certainty?

Thor brushed his hand over Mjolnir’s hilt and wondered what Loki had truly thought when their father named him heir.

…Perhaps he would ask.

--xx--

The banquet had been going on for nearly an hour when the announcement was made.  Though the presence of Mjolnir at Thor’s side had already caused whispers and more or less taken away the surprise.  Odin announced Thor as heir and in truth, Thor had no desire to rise.

Thor rose to his feet with a triumphant grin as he faced those present and lifted Mjolnir high into the air.  He pumped his arm up and down as his people cheered and to encourage them further he shouted.  “For Asgard!  For Asgard!”   Thor basked in the clapping, whistles, and cheers as he saw only thrilled faces around him.  His people were pleased, they wanted him to be king, this could only be a good thing.

Thor rose and forced a smile to his face as he held Mjolnir aloft at his side.  As the people in the banquet hall cheered he waved Mjolnir around the room once before he settled her back at his side.

“Do you have any words, Thor, Crown Prince of Asgard?”  Odin asked with a small smile at his son’s joy and the peoples’ excitement.

Thor had not expected to speak and he faltered a moment as he glanced at his father and then his brother who tilted his head with a ‘well, go on’ look.  He licked his lips and clenched Mjolnir’s shaft.  “I did not expect to speak this day.”  he admitted off the bat with a wry grin as he tried to cover his sudden nervousness with bravado.  “In truth, all I can say is that I hope to one day be as honorable and wise as my father.  And that I may bring Asgard only glory and victory!”  he added, and as he hoped, that earned a rousing cheer.  That seemed a safe thing to play off of given that most in the room were warriors.  He hoped that was sufficient as he pumped Mjolnir in the air again, nodded to his father who seemed approving, and sat back down with a hearty grin.

“Already planning your future battles, brother?”  Loki said wryly.

“My future victories.”  Thor corrected as he fed on the rush of the moment and winked at their friends who grinned back at him.

“Do you have any words, Thor, Crown Prince of Asgard?”  Odin asked.

It was strange to face the same moment and feel so differently.  There was no thrum of excitement, no rush of adrenaline, no thrill about the future or even the same nervousness at the unexpected request.  Mjolnir was not the toy for ‘vain and greedy boy’ as his father would one day call him.  Nor was the burden of the throne a light one.

Thor licked his lips as he glanced around at the expectant, joyous faces.  He looked to his father and then to his brother who gave the same nod of encouragement.  Thor gripped Mjolnir as he said, loud enough to be heard by all but in an almost solemn tone.  “People of Asgard…today I receive a great honor, and a great responsibility.  I shall strive to be worthy of it.  But I did not reach this moment alone.  I have had the benefit of the greatest king and queen in the realms.  A wise and loyal brother.”  he said with a glance at Loki who looked absolutely startled.  “And companions who I am honored to stand with.  In that respect, this is not solely my moment.  I thank you for your support, and will work each day to merit the trust that has been placed in me.”  he turned to his father and gave a respectful half-bow as he held Mjolnir over his heart as if to swear fealty to his father.

The first time, Odin had seemed fond and approving.  But this time there was a respect in Odin’s eyes, and perhaps a hint of surprise, that had not been there before.  But in a way, that only puzzled Thor more, had he been any more ready to be heir than he ever had to be king?  Odin inclined his head to show approval and grant Thor leave to sit.  As he did so, Loki stared at him like he’d grown another head.

Thor wished he’d done as much the first time around.  He wished he’d done many things differently.  Thor braced his arm around Loki’s back as he squeezed his brother’s shoulder.  “I spoke truly, Loki.  I did not reach this moment alone, thankfully.  I am lucky to have you for my brother.”  Emotions splayed over Loki’s face too quickly to read.  But Thor saw his jaw tighten and thought he may even have seen a quick hint of wetness in Loki’s eyes before he abruptly pushed Thor’s mug of ale towards him.

“You have either drunk too much or too little.  But in either case, a toast.”  Loki said quickly as he picked up his glass of wine.  “To Thor, my brother, and our future king.”

“To Thor!”  Their table loudly cheered which was then heard and picked up by the room.

Loki’s heart thundered in his chest as his thoughts went about wildly.  He had expected Thor to wave Mjolnir around, say something foolish, and then raise his cups.  The speech had been…rather thoughtful, actually, and not at all what he would have expected of Thor.  Then the oaf had gone and spoken of Loki in it which had quite shocked him.  Loki was thrown off his guard and it continued when Thor gripped his shoulder and told him with what seemed the utmost sincerity that he was lucky to have him for a brother and acknowledged him.

The thing of it was, Thor must mean it.  He had no reason in that moment to lie and no talent for guile.  But Loki could not make heads nor tails of why Thor would say it, or that he believed it.  Apparently he did though?  The situation was more than a little confounding.  And yet he could still feel the phantom warmth and weight of his brother’s broad hand on his shoulder.  The words and warm look replayed in his mind.   He was embarrassed at the sting of emotion in his eyes and quickly disguised it with a toast as he changed the subject, lest something nonsensical fall from his surprised lips.  Loki cast a side-eye at his brother as he jovially enough chatted with his friends.  ‘A wise and loyal brother’.

He stared down at his glass at the sudden lump that formed in his throat.  Loki hated that he had already inscribed the words into his mind and heart, that they would already be cherished, yet another scrap from Thor he could not help but hoard.

“-Actually.”  Thor was saying, and Loki returned his attention to the conversation as Thor’s palm found the side of his upper arm.  “I had a mind to go with my brother.  If he would wish.”

”What?”  Loki asked blankly.

“It is custom to take a short journey after an heir is declared.  A last moment of freedom."

“I know.”  Loki said, but still didn’t quite understand what he’d missed as he glanced to Sif and the Warriors Three.  Sif wore a faint frown while Fandral seemed amused, Hogun was unreadable as usual and Volstagg had a grin.

Thor met his brother’s gaze.  “I thought you and I might go somewhere.  It has been a long time since we’ve journeyed alone.”

Loki blinked as he stared at his brother in further surprise.  “You…wish to spend your celebration week with me?”

“Aye, brother.”  Thor said with a light chuckle as if it were an obvious thing to have suggested.  “Unless you have other plans?”  he asked with amusement.

“Perhaps I do.”  Loki said, mostly to stall and in no particular tone.  He saw Sif scoff lightly out of the corner of his eye.

“If Loki will not have you, we will!”  Volstagg declared merrily, well into his cups.

“He could always join us later.”  Fandral said.

A kind of panic seized Loki as he was in danger of losing the strange whim of Thor’s.  He may yet do so anyway, for all he knew, Thor would wake on the morrow and inform him that of course the others would go as well.  “But for you, brother mine, I suppose I can rearrange my schedule.”  Loki was a tad delighted at the way Thor’s lips twitched in a crooked smirk as if they were bantering.

“You are a generous brother indeed.”  Thor said ‘solemnly’, and Loki found himself grinning a bit in reply.

“Where are we to go?”  Loki asked even as he tried not to be too excited at the prospect, his brother would likely change his mind in short order.

Thor shrugged.  “Alfheim, Vanaheim, Midgard.  You pick.”

“Midgard.”  Loki scrunched his nose in distaste.  “Whatever for?”

Thor chuckled again and amended.  “Alfheim or Vanaheim then.  I have no preference.”

“Who are you and what have you done with my brother?”  Loki asked, quite flabbergasted by the unexpected turn of events.  He noticed a spasm across Thor’s face as Thor looked at him with almost wide eyes and a flicker of unease found Loki.

“You have caught me out.”  Thor declared, a touch dramatically.  “I am a dragon in disguise.  I have a taste for kingship and fine mead and I shall take my pick of tribute.”  he said as he promptly polished off his mug.

With that, Loki lost his unease and rolled his eyes instead.  His brother was a fool, even in moments of rare thoughtfulness, clearly.  “I will think on it and give you an answer tomorrow.”  Loki said, as he still expected Thor to change his mind by then and preferred not to set his heart towards something that would only disappoint him.

“Do not think too long, we will be leaving in the afternoon tomorrow.”

“W-”  Loki spluttered.  “That quickly?”

Thor grinned.  “As I said, do not think too long.”

The rest of the night passed smoothly enough and when it came time to disband, Thor received a hug and congratulations from his mother.  For good measure she hugged her youngest as well and Thor felt a pang at the sight.  His mother and brother were lost to him.  Odin gave both of his sons a fond grip of their shoulders before the brothers headed off.

“Get your rest, brother, you’ll need it.”  Thor said as he saw Loki to his room again.

“So you say.”  Loki said wryly before he hesitated and then set his hand on Thor’s forearm.  “You will be a good king, brother.  In time.”

Loki had not said those words to Thor the first time around and if he had, Thor would have taken it to mean ‘when Odin steps down’ if he paid it any mind at all.  But now what Thor heard was Loki saying Thor wasn’t yet ready, but would be.

“It means much to hear you say so.”  Thor said as he clasped his brother in their gesture of affection and bit down on the pain it spurred in him as he could not keep comparisons and memories of his own family and brother [and regrets] from his mind.  “Thank you, Loki.”

Loki swallowed hard and then cleared his throat, he seemed faintly embarrassed.  “Yes, well, good night then.  I shall hold you to your invitation.  If you forget it on the morrow you may spend your first day as crown prince as a frog.”  he warned.

Thor grimaced.  “That is more than enough motivation to remember.  Good night, brother.”  he patted his brother’s neck before he headed off and hoped this would be a step in the right direction.

Loki watched his brother till he was out of sight then closed the door as he touched his fingertips to his neck.  He wasn’t sure what mood had taken his brother, but he hoped it might last.

--xx--

The next morning, Loki found Thor at conversation with their mother in the hall.  He braced himself for the inevitable and approached.

“Loki!”  Thor greeted him warmly and the first thing he asked was.  “Where have you decided?”

Loki’s mouth open and closed before he managed.  “You were serious?”

“You thought it was a jest?”

“Not exactly.”  More like a partially inebriated and gleeful whim.  “Then you really mean for us to leave?”

“Aye…in…”  Thor glanced out the window to the sun speculatively.  “A couple of hours?  So you had best pack if you have not.”

“We cannot just-"

“-Brother.”  Thor interrupted with a merrily vicious grin.  “When I come to collect you, ready or not, we are leaving.  Even if I must carry you to the Bifrost.”

Loki looked to his mother who merely smiled and then Loki cursed before he teleported back to his room.  If Thor had made up his mind then he absolutely would literally carry Loki to the bridge if Loki pulled a fuss.

“Poor dear.”  Frigga said with amusement.  “It pleases me that you have chosen to spend your celebration thus.”

Thor smiled before he sighed.  “I tried to ease Loki’s mood after Father told us.  I think it took it for mocking, or for pity.”

“Then show him otherwise.  You shall have time enough for it.”

“But what should I say?”  Thor asked.

Frigga’s smiled widened as she placed her palm above her son’s heart.  “Speak truly from your heart.  There can be no better offer of sincerity.”  Thor’s expression scrunched at that and Frigga chuckled.

“...Was it always going to be me?”  Thor asked with Loki’s heritage in mind.  “Would Father…have ever given Loki the throne?”

“Was there a reason he should not?”  Frigga asked with a lifted brow, and that too looked so like Loki.

“Of course not.  But…Loki seemed certain it would be me."

Frigga considered the question as she weighed her answer.  “You each have qualities that would make you excellent kings.  And likewise, you bear weaknesses.  It is well the Norns have made you complements to each other.  For you were always meant to stand together.  Whichever of you holds the throne, you will face Asgard united.”

Except they wouldn’t.  The throne would tear them apart as much as anything else.  Thor noticed that his mother hadn’t explicitly answered his question either.  But he supposed there was an answer in that.

--

Loki heard his brother’s knock and waved his hand to open the door with sorcery.  Thor took in that Loki had clearly bathed and dressed, done his usual work of smoothing his hair, and was in the process of packing.

“Did I not tell you I would take you, ready or not?”  Thor mused and Loki cast him a sharp look.

“Place one hand on me, Thor, and see what it gets you.”  he warned.

Thor was half-tempted to try if only for the pleasure of a fight with his brother whose only stakes were whatever punishment Loki might dole out.  He instead indulged in being allowed into Loki’s room as he watched his brother who bore no tension in his presence.  Loki quickly set about packing with muttered gripes about Thor’s impatience and lack of planning.  “So where are we going?”

Loki paused as he gave Thor a sidelong glance.  “You really mean for me to choose?”

“I have said so, have I not?”

“...Alfheim then.  Ljosalfgard.  And then from there…we shall see.  If that is agreeable to you.”  The way Loki asked it gave Thor the impression he expected it would not be.

Thor wracked his brain for why that seemed relevant and then he grinned.  “Are we going to Ljosalfgard for your honeyed breads?”

Loki huffed.  “Of course not.  It is simply a…reasonable choice.”

“I will remember you said so when you drag us first thing to a stall.”  Thor chuckled.

“I see your mood has not diminished.”  Loki grumbled as Thor hit the nail on the head.

“Should it have?”

Loki shrugged.  “You are being very…considerate.”  he added.

And that was the moment Thor visibly saw the suspicion start to creep in.  Thor saw it so blatantly he wondered how he had ever missed it before.

Because you weren’t looking.  His mind supplied and he flinched internally at the truth in it.  “As opposed to being a terrible brute?”  Thor teased lightly, despite the discomfit the thought and his brother’s reaction caused him.

“You are always that.”  Loki said without missing a beat.

Thor had missed this, he had missed their banter and snark.  But he also missed being able to spend time in his brother’s company without the looming question mark of wondering if Loki was being honest or dissembling.  He wondered if he could have ever gained that back with his brother, the broken trust and the faith in both directions.

After another half hour and Thor badgering his brother’s tardiness [to which Loki scowled and complained that Thor had given him no real warning], the brothers headed for the Bifrost.

Not until they were nearly at the Bifrost Gate room did Loki say with a sudden frown.  “You have forgotten Mjolnir.”

Thor glanced to his side and realized Loki had a point.  He didn’t expect trouble in Ljosalfgard but…he held out his hand as he called Mjolnir to him.  When she came, he hooked her onto his belt casually and looked to his brother who stared with wide eyes.  “What?”

“You summoned Mjolnir to your hand?”  Loki looked at him with disbelief.

Thor cursed to himself as he realized Thor shouldn’t have known yet how to do that.  “Aye.”  he made himself chuckle.  “I found out by accident.  I could not find her last night and was reaching about, wanting her, and then she just…came to me.”

Loki looked from Thor to the hammer dubiously.  “Just like that.”

Thor shrugged before he gestured.  “Are you done stalling?”  he asked, as though that were the only reason Loki had questioned him.

Loki frowned slightly before he turned on his heel.  “Impatient oaf.”  he muttered.

Thor exhaled silently in relief as he passed the slip-up by without major incident.  He was relieved and a bit surprised that Loki had so easily agreed to come, even with the last-minute nature of the invitation and the surrounding circumstances.  Thor had decided to make the most of his time in this place, and this was too important an event and opportunity to pass up.  The first time around, the group had gone carousing in Vanaheim.  Loki had come, but Thor paid him no special mind, and continued to rake in attention with Mjolnir and his new status.  He had all but dragged Loki along to watch Thor celebrate his triumph and what Loki probably saw as his own failure.

Thor would do what he could to correct that or at least soften the blow.  And he could spend time with ‘his brother’ in the process.  With that in mind, he followed Loki into the Gate room and to Alfheim.