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Black gazes down at the small, damp form of his twin, overlooking the water.
“Trying to drown yourself?”
White shrugs. “I wanted your attention.”
“Well you have it now.”
“I wasn’t trying to die. Just,” White hesitates, “make my outsides feel like my insides.”
“You just can’t stay away, can you?”
“You know I can’t. It’s too late now. It feels like I’m drowning without him.”
Black wasn’t awake yet when his brother and Sean did, well, whatever they did together. But he can guess.
“I could feel it, you know?”
“Me drowning?”
“Of course. But I can feel,” Black stops, unsure of how to explain himself.
“What?”
“When you kiss him, when you’re turned on, I can feel it.”
White’s face rapidly switches from looking horrified to amused.
“Jealous?"
Black scoffs. “Hardly. I’ve fucked him you know.”
Shock ripples across White’s face.
“Don’t get bent out of shape about it. It was an initiation thing.”
‘What?”
“To join the gang.”
White’s face pales and he lets the silence linger, staring down at his wet sneakers.
“He fucked you, didn’t he?” Black says, sure of it now.
His brother says nothing.
“I’m surprised he didn’t realize sooner that you weren’t me.”
Wiping a few escaped tears, White removes his glasses and stares at his brother’s stoic expression.
“What do you want from me?”
“I wanted you to stay out of my life, but you fucked that up, didn’t you?”
White’s tears are starting to pull at something in his chest that he’s worked so hard for years to try to repress.
“Come on,” Black stands up, offering his brother a hand. “Let’s go home.”
“Where is home?”
“Back to my place.”
Black pulls his brother to standing, leading them over to his motorbike. As Black weaves through the city streets, White clings tightly to his back, pressing himself close.
They climb the stairs and enter his ransacked apartment. Black locks the door behind them.
“What about Todd?”
“If he send people here, I’ll fuck them up like the last goons he sent.”
White nods meekly.
“You smell like a dirty river.”
White hangs his head.
“If you won’t stop and go back to your own life, at least let me take care of you.”
Black peels the damp tan jacket from his brother’s stiff shoulders. Then he pulls the wet shirt off him. It lands with a wet splat on his floor. His hand trails to the button of his brother’s teal pants. White kicks off his sodden shoes as his brother unzips his pants. The skinny pants are very difficult to get off, heavy and wet, clingy to his thin form. Black finally succeeds, White picks up his feet as Black kneels to pull the material from his legs. Skimming his hands up his brother’s legs, he settles his fingertips on the waistband of his sodden boxer briefs. The material clings to his brother’s soft cock, outlined at his eye level. He swiftly pulls down, freeing his brother’s dick. White obediently steps out of the wet boxers, fully naked.
Rising quickly, he clamps a hand around White’s wrist, dragging him into the bathroom. Black adjusts the temperature in his shower and then nudges White toward the stream. “Wait,” he commands. White turns his head over his shoulder and Black gently removes his glasses, putting them on the ledge of the sink. White takes the hint and steps into the cascading water.
Stepping back, Black rummages around his destroyed place for towels before quickly stripping himself. He joins his brother in the shower. White stands still under the meager spray. Black reaches for a flannel and the soap Eugene had left in his shower. He lathers it up, the scent of lemongrass and mint wafting up around them.
Black runs it across White’s shoulders. He soaps up his brother’s back, then down his legs. “Up,” Black commands and White lifts the soles of each foot. Black turns his twin toward him, soaping up his shins, his thighs, his hips, across his abs. He imagined that his brother would be a softer version of himself, but his abs are well defined. Maybe weeks of training with Gumpa did this to him. Maybe he was already in top shape.
He slides the soapy cloth across his brother’s small pectoral muscles and up his shoulders. Then lathers under his arms before working down toward his hands, careful, but rigorous, to get him clean. Swiping the cloth over his twin’s adam’s apple, and then the nape of his neck, he makes a decision. He gets on his knees in the shower, dragging the still foamy cloth with him down his brother’s torso. Wrapping a hand around his brother’s cock, he lifts it up, washing his balls with the cloth, before getting his soapy hand around his brother’s prick, stroking it up and down.
White’s cock twitches to life in his palm and Black immediately feels his own body reacting to his ministrations on his twin. It was something he’d always suspected. If he could feel White’s pain, why would he not be able to feel his pleasure as well? White moans and wobbles in the shower. When White is fully hard against his hand, Black stands, turning his brother around to face the wall.
Black nudges his brother’s legs apart as his own erection strains. He runs the cloth between his cheeks, cleaning him. He quickly soaps up his own body, before getting his hands slippery. “Spread yourself for me.” White reaches back, one hand on each ass cheek and pulls himself open for his brother. Black runs his soapy fingers around his brother’s hole. Hungry to get inside.
Black doesn’t have lube. The last person he was fucking was Eugene and they never had anal sex. In general, he doesn't prefer men. But there is something about his brother. He wants to claim him, own him. It was his body after all. He’d tried so hard to forget about White, take ownership of his body. Getting tattoos and piercings to claim his body as his own, distinct from his phantom twin. But now, inspecting his brother’s nude body, he could see that Todd had taken that from him. What a sick fuck Todd was, tattooing his soon-to-be-a-diplomat brother. Piercing his flesh. Making his own Black puppet to do his bidding.
He wonders if Sean was gentle with his brother as he works his soapy finger inside his twin. Heat blooms deep in his low belly. White inhales sharply at the intrusion. Black pushes further inside. His brother is so tight. Finally, he gets his finger fully inside and slowly fucks it in and out of his brother, letting him get used to the motion. Then he works a second finger inside his tight hole, watching as his brother’s furl stretches around his fingers.
White’s hands try fruitlessly to grip at the tile as Black works a third finger into him. He assumes that White isn’t an anal virgin anymore. He tries to remember back to when Gumpa fucked him, what he did. How he had prepared him. He doesn't want to hurt White. His cock is straining and he desperately wants to sink inside his brother’s hole. Then he touches something inside White that makes him moan and go rigid. Ahh. He had almost forgotten about that. It’s been a while since he fucked a guy.
White pushes his ass back as Black strokes his fingers against the delicate bundle of nerves inside him again. He is shocked when the feeling ripples through himself as well. White and Black both cry out in surprise. The sparks of pleasure light up within him as he feels White’s sensations of pleasure like an echo all around him.
Black’s cock throbs with want. He decides maybe his brother will be more amenable to being fucked after he’s come. Reaching around, Black grips his twin’s cock, stroking him up and down as his fingers continue to fuck into him. “That’s it, baby brother,” Black encourages as White moves between his hands, fucking into his fist and back onto Black’s fingers.
He can feel White’s pleasure rippling and building within himself as well. He rubs his cock against his brother’s hip, desperate for friction as he takes White higher and higher. As his fingers stroke inside his brother, he feels an ersatz sensation within himself. It’s not unpleasant. The feeling of his prostate being stimulated only increases his pleasure. His brother’s moans help to bring him back to the present. It’s hard to decipher what are his sensations and what are his brother’s. Pleasure crests in waves, unlike anything he’s ever felt before.
White’s cheek is pressed against the shower wall, his breathing ragged. He stiffens against the tile, arching his back, crying out as he comes. Black feels his own orgasm rip through him as he pulls his fingers out of his brother’s ass. He paints his brother’s hole with his come, the intense pleasure of his release lighting him up.
Black slumps against his brother’s back, panting into his neck as he tries to regain his equilibrium. Holy fuck that was amazing. He can only imagine what it will feel like to sink into his brother’s hole later. Wrapping an arm around White’s waist, he pulls him from the wall and into the spray to rinse him off once again. When he’s satisfied they are both clean he pulls White’s back against his chest, his cock fitting snugly between his brother’s cheeks. He runs his thumbs over White’s nipples. White’s shaking against him, not yet recovered. Black shuts off the water.
Recovering more quickly, Black pulls his brother from the shower. He gives himself a perfunctory swipe with his own towel before wrapping it around his waist. He grips White’s wrist dragging him back out into the studio toward the bedroom. He lays a towel down on his bed and then pushes until White lies down on top of it. Then he methodically dries his brother with his own damp towel, inspecting his body as he goes. Marvel and rage war inside him as he notices the similarities of their nude bodies.
Black runs his fingertips over the tattoo on his brother’s arm. Twin to his own. Anger fizzles hot and bright that Todd had marked White like this, like him. Mocking up a puppet for himself. His soft, baby brother, a mirror image of himself now. He kisses the tattoo, each stripe of it. Then looks down into White’s dark eyes.
Black doesn’t have lube. But he does have the coconut oil that Eugene liked to use in her hair and on her skin.
“I don’t want to hurt you. I need to know. Did Sean fuck you?”
“Yes,” White says quietly.
“Did you enjoy it?”
“Yes.”
“Have you been with men before?”
“No. Only women. Sean was,” White hesitates, “unexpected. But I was attracted to him from almost the beginning.”
He kisses White, licking into his mouth, exploring his taste.
White’s chest heaves under him as his hands wrap around Black’s neck.
Black breaks the kiss and stares down at his twin. “You are me, and I am you.”
“Yes,” White agrees.
“So us having sex is like masturbating. There is nothing wrong with it.” Black said plainly. “You want me to fuck you, right?”
White flushes but nods. Black reaches for the jar of coconut oil on his bedside table, unscrewing the lid. Dipping his fingers into the jar of coconut oil, he leans back and looks at his brother. White’s legs are splayed out on either side of Black’s knees. He looks relaxed and open. Black nudges his legs further apart and works a finger into his brother’s hole, glad he loosened him up in the shower.
“We both want this,” Black says as he strokes his brother’s cock to hardness again. “I can feel how much you want it,” he said, squeezing White’s cock in his palm.
White puts a hand on Black’s chest, over his heart. “I can feel how much you want this here, too.”
Black rolls his eyes, but nods. It’s true. He can feel how much White wants him, so then surely White can feel how much he wants this as well. To be united. To be together. The doubling of the pleasure was unexpected. But in the shower he felt it like a strong echo surrounding him, muddling and amplifying his own sensations.
Black didn’t enjoy being fucked. He didn’t mind fucking the other guys, but if it hadn’t been for the initiation rite Gumpa insisted on, he wouldn’t have seeked it out himself. Briefly he wonders if he will like the phantom feeling of being fucked. He’s about to find out.
He works the coconut oil inside his brother, his walls still tight, but more pliant. Black leans forward and kisses White, needing to taste him. His soft pillowy lips meet his with enthusiasm. White’s hips buck up from the bed. Black slicks up his own cock with the excess oil on his hands before teasing White’s nipples. It feels like he’s stroking his own chest, his own nipples peaked and hardened at the sensations of his twin. Then he strokes his brother’s cock and it feels like he’s jacking himself, slow and steady.
“Fuck, that feels so good.”
White’s hands grip his hips, pulling him closer. “Please,” he begs.
Black knows what he needs.
White pulls Black down into a frantic kiss, but Black pulls back, slowing down the kiss, taking his baby’s brother’s bottom lip into his mouth, sucking on it. Teasing him.
“Black, please! I need you.”
Sliding his cock against his brother’s entrance, he fucks between his cheeks, slick and needy. His cock is fully hard and ready. He looks down into his brother’s eyes as he pushes forward, breaching his brother’s hole. White’s eyes widen as his brother sinks further inside him. Black closes his eyes for a moment overwhelmed by the sensations. His brother’s slick, warm channel, the phantom sensation of being fucked himself, it’s almost too much.
He listens to White’s ragged breathing to ground him, trying to separate his own sensations from that of his brother’s. White’s ass grips him tightly. “Shh,” Black soothes, “relax, let me in.” He kisses his brother’s throat before pulling back. Gazing down at White, his eyes scrunched shut as he tries to do as Black says, Black kisses him on the lips again. He pulls back a fraction, just breathing the same air as his brother.
“It’s so much,” White chokes out against Black’s lips. And Black knows he means the dual sensations of pleasure.
Slowly, Black sinks into his brother until he’s fully seated inside him. He marvels at the sensation of the slick, tight passage. He looks down into his brother’s eyes. “Look at me,” he instructs White.
White blinks his eyes open, looking almost drunk. They hold each other’s gaze for a few moments, before White gives a little nod. Still maintaining eye contact, Black pulls his hips back, dragging his cock slowly from his brother’s soft, slick heat. He feels his brother’s hole contract around the tip of his cock, as if to stop him from fully leaving him. Black watches White’s pupils dilate as he slowly sinks fully back inside. White’s eyelids flutter shut as he moans.
Black fucks him slowly, tenderly. White runs his hands up and down his back, the sweat building up between them. Black leans back and watches as his cock disappears inside his brother’s channel, a fierce and primal pride at the way his cock stretches his brother’s hole. He loves watching the length of his dick fit inside his twin. He carefully feeds him his cock until Black is sure that he can take more.
He wraps his hands around White’s wrists and pins them to the bed, fucking into his brother faster. His pace builds, growing more frantic. White bucks against him, meeting his thrusts. His eyes glazed as the pleasure pings and builds between them, the sensations amplified and building.
Black is awash in sensation, feeling it crest and ebb between their bodies. He grips White’s cock loosely in his fist and jacks as he fucks into him. “Let’s come together,” he pants, working White faster.
White nods and moans, tightening around Black’s cock, squeezing him from the inside.
“Fuck, fuck you feel so good, White.”
He can feel when White tips over the edge, the muscles in his lower abdomen contracting, and his inner muscles as well. White arches off the towel, painting their bellies with his come. Black feels the pleasure bursting within his twin and himself, whiting out for a moment as he comes. His cock kicks inside his brother, filling him with his hot seed. His brother’s inner muscles ripple around his dick and Black’s arms become jelly. He falls against the heaving chest of his brother, groaning into White’s neck, riding the intense sensations as the waves wash over the both of them, the pleasure almost too much.
They shiver against each other, oversensitive. Black feels his cock soften inside his baby brother and reluctantly pulls out. He uses his own discarded towel to wipe his brother’s come off his abs. Then watches White’s slightly gaping hole as his own come dribbles out; evidence of their fucking, of his intense pleasure. Black carefully swipes up the overflow of his own come from his brother’s hole. He goes back into the bathroom to get a washcloth and cleans his brother up as best he can, including White’s own come streaked across his stomach.
After he discards the towels, Black lays back down on his bed, White cuddling into his chest. They doze for a while, exhausted by their activities, the world feeling soft and muzzy around them in the afterglow of such intense pleasure.
“I’m not going to stop seeing him,” White says quietly later.
“I know.”
“I love him.”
“I know.”
“Does this mean you’ll stop being such a dick to him?”
“Because he’s fucking my brother? Nope.”
“Because he loves me. You know he does. He told you.”
“Yeah and then I beat the shit out of him.” Black silences White with a kiss. “Am I a better kisser than him?”
White pushes his face away, and Black laughs into his neck, licking up the column of his brother’s throat.