Chapter Text
Tony hated caves. He always had. So it stood to reason that, the universe being a contrary asshole, he would end up in a cave. Again.
The walls were dripping, but at least it was better than the fucking blizzard outside.
He shivered.
At least there was no sand. Small mercies.
But a white wasteland of snow still counted as a desert, and Tony did not like those either.
“Fuck.” His breath smoked before his face, the short burst of warmth made his nose sting. His fingers were numb already, and his throat hurt.
Perhaps he would listen to Bruce’s spiel about lab safety next time. Then again, maybe not.
He had managed to make Jane’s concept work, after all. This had to be the first Einstein-Rosen-Bridge stable enough to be crossed by a living person. This was the first step towards making teleportation possible! If Tony wasn’t freezing his ass off and a couple hours away from dying, he’d be celebrating.
As it was, he was feeling more concerned about his current situation than by their quite impressive accomplishment.
He rubbed his arms again, clenching his teeth to keep them from chattering. It didn’t work.
He had nothing with him but the clothes on his back and his phone in his pocket. He hadn’t been planning on crossing after all, and even if he had, the other side of the portal had been supposed to still be in the lab.
Not wherever this was in the middle of buttfuck nowhere.
Tony cursed. There was no service. Tony didn’t want to think through the implications.
He was the one who had designed the SI satellite coverage, and he knew where the blank spots were.
Nowhere, that’s where. He’d designed it so that he could have service everywhere, even if he was stranded on top of Mount Everest or somewhere in Antarctica.
And yet, here he was. No service.
The portal had thrown him somewhere on another planet. Under a huge ass snowstorm.
Still, he could breathe. And walk without being crushed by gravity, small mercies.
All he needed was to figure out how to get home.
And how to not freeze to death.
Fuck.