Chapter Text
“Akaashi! Did ya see that?! They were kissing!” Bokuto’s smile stretched wide across his face.
“Yes Bokuto-san, I saw.” Akaashi leaned against the wall of the Nekoma dorm’s hallway. He and his roommate Bokuto had just walked in on two of their friends making out. “We probably shouldn’t talk about it out here, someone may overhear.”
“What’s wrong with that? There’s nothing wrong with kissing the homies!” Oh Bokuto… “You told me that friends don’t kiss!”
“They don’t.”
“Well they were! And Kuroo and Kenma are just friends.” Bokuto’s not the best at picking up on context clues.
“We don’t know that. Maybe they're more.”
Bokuto grinned. “Ya think? Surely they would tell us.” Akaashi shrugged. “And we’re just friends, Akaashi, but I wanna kiss you sometimes.”
“What?” Akaashi snapped his head in Bokuto’s direction. “Repeat that.”
Bokuto rubbed the back of his neck. “I mean, yeah, sometimes I want to kiss you.” Bokuto looked embarrassed. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable, I just meant it casually. I don’t think there’s anything wrong with that, is there?”
“N- no! I just… didn’t know that.” Is Bokuto serious? He’s been wanting to kiss me? Could he like me back? No, he wants to kiss as friends. But, is there really such a thing as kissing without feelings? “Bokuto-san…”
“Yes?” Bokuto made eye contact.
Akaashi pushed himself onto his tip toes so he could talk quietly to the other man. Is this my chance? Should I tell him? Does he feel the same? He brought his lips close to Bokuto’s ear. He couldn’t resist. “Bokuto… slam me against the wall…” Fuck, fuck, I shouldn’t of said that. I was too bold.
Bokuto looked confused. “But Akaashi! I don’t want to fight with you right now!”
Oh. He doesn’t get it. Maybe it’s better this way. Akaaski looked away. “Aha, I was just joking, Bo.”
“Oh.” Bokuto chuckled. “Sometimes your sarcasm goes over my head!”
The door to their friend's suite opened and out stepped Kenma with Kuroo not far behind. Kuroo had his usual smirk on his face but Kenma had his chin tucked into the collar of his jacket. He seemed embarrassed about what they had seen earlier.
“Bro-kuto!” Kuroo and Bokuto did their weird friendship handshake. Kuroo turned to Akaashi. “Akaashi.” He nodded.
Akaashi nodded back in greeting. “Kuroo.”
“Let’s go so we don’t be late!” Bokuto bounded down the hallway with Kuroo by his side. The two chattering like they hadn’t spoken in years, though it hadn’t been more than a week since they hung out last.
Akaashi followed the pair, he wasn’t as energetic as those too. But neither was Kenma, so they usually ended up walking together. Today however, Kenma seemed to be lagging behind, lost in his own mind. He wasn’t even scrolling through his phone or playing on his PSP like usual. Akaashi slowed his steps as they exited the building onto the sidewalk. He fell into step with Kenma. “Kenma.”
“Akaashi… listen.” Kenma fidgeted with his jacket. “I don’t know how much you saw earlier, but-”
“Don’t worry about it.” He cut Kenma off. “You don’t owe anyone an explanation. And I won’t tell anyone.”
Kenma softly smiled, clearly relieved. “Thanks Akaashi. You’re a great friend.”
“No problem.” He glanced at the shorter boy by his side. “There is one thing though…”
Kenma looked over at him. “And that is?”
“Well, it’s just… I didn’t know that Kuroo was in an open relationship.” Kenma gave him a puzzled look and horror filled Akaashi. Shit, did Kuroo not tell him? “S-sorry, maybe I shouldn’t-”
“It’s fine.” Kenma’s normal calm settled back onto his face. “You must mean Tsukki, right?”
Oh good, he knows. I would never be able to forgive myself for outing Kuroo’s relationships. “Yes. Did they break up?”
“No- yes- I don’t know. They were never really dating in the first place, so there wasn’t much to break up.” Now that was surprising. Akaashi often overheard Kuroo talking about Tsukishima with Bokuto. The four of them had even hung out together a few times. “They just… did stuff I guess. But it was never official. Not that I would care if it was or anything, Kuroo and I aren't dating! I mean, they are taking a break. But it’s not because of me! Or… at least I hope it’s not.”
Kenma furrowed his brow. “Maybe I shouldn’t have asked. Don’t feel bad though, I’m sure they didn’t… ‘take a break’ because of you. It was probably their own shit they had to work out. Besides, no relationship where you have to keep it a secret works out in the end.”
Kenma titled his head. “Do you really believe that?”
“I think so. If you’re embarrassed to be with your partner, then how can you expect it to work out?”
“Well, maybe that’s not the reason.” Kenma replied. “Like what if- I don’t know- like they just don’t wanna deal with everyone knowing all their business. Or if people would accept them if they… like the same gender or something.”
Akaashi chuckled. “You can say gay, you know. There’s nothing wrong with being gay.”
“I- I didn’t mean it like that!” Kenma looked at the sidewalk as they walked. “I just meant that people might not accept them… even though it’s something they can’t control.”
Akaashi frowned. He knew. He’d grown up with homophobes, and people who didn’t accept others for who they are. He trained himself to be apathetic, to not care. But sometimes it still hurts. “I know.” He said quietly. “It’s fucked.”
“Totally fucked.” They walked in silence for a moment until Kenma spoke. “By the way Akaashi, the dorm hallways are not soundproof… If you want to fuck Bokuto, just tell him. You know he’s not going to pick up on your hints.”
“W- what!” Akaashi felt himself blush. Kenma heard what I said? “I never said I wanted to fuck Bokuto!”
“Yeah, but you said you wanted him to slam you against the wall, I don’t know how much clearer you could be.” Kenma looked at the sky. “I say go for it, honestly.”
There was no use in hiding it at this point, Kenma already knew how he felt towards Bokuto. “But what if he doesn’t like me back?”
“Oh c’mon, you heard him, he literally said he wanted to kiss you.”
“In a friend way.”
“There’s no such thing as-” Kenma stopped.
“Kenma?” Akaashi looked at him. “You okay?”
“Oh my god.” Kenma’s mouth hung open. “There’s no such thing…”
“No such thing as what? As kissing as friends? But isn’t that… Oh. ” He understood.
“Oh. Fuck .” They rounded a corner and saw their friends already at the restaurant. “Akaashi, am I a complete idiot?”
“Yeah.” Akaashi sighed. “But no more than I am.”
“Guess we’re both fucked.” Kenma and Akaashi approached the restaurant. Neither knew how they're going to get through this meal.