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“What do you think of JJ’s replacement?” Aaron asked Emily as he accepted the cup of coffee she offered him. Emily smiled and took a sip of her own. Everyone else had gone home for the day and they had fallen into the habit of a cup of coffee and casual conversation when the others were gone. There might still be some work to do or an issue to deal with but this was time where work technically wasn’t mentioned. They might do a check in on the other, enquire about a case that had hit hard or an update on any new injuries. Other times they just wanted to bitch about Struass or gossip about the rest of the team. Although everyone assumed Garcia or Rossi were the ones who knew all the gossip and scuttlebutt from around the FBI; Aaron actually knew a lot more, whether he was the one who heard it first or had the juicy details that the rumour mill had skipped. It was their little secret of course, he did have a reputation to maintain.
“She seems quite nice, let’s hope she’s up for it.” Emily replied. From their limited meeting with Agent Todd, she and Reid had liked her and it had been funny to see her mess with Morgan’s head. Although she was a strong, capable agent, the BAU was on another level in comparison to counter-terrorism. Even some of the strongest agents who had ever set foot in the FBI struggled with the BAU. “JJ’s determined to ensure that Agent Todd’s prepared for everything.”
“Hopefully,” Aaron agreed. “There is one possibility that I don’t think JJ’s prepared for.”
“Oh she isn’t. She avoids the subject every time Garcia and I try to bring it up.” Emily said knowingly.
As JJ’s due date got closer and closer, they had tried to encourage her to start her maternity leave before she got to 38 weeks but pregnancy had brought out JJ’s stubborn side and she had put her foot down. Garcia was trying to gently encourage JJ to relax, spend time with Will and take her time ensuring that everything was ready for whenever Baby Jareau-LaMontagne made his way into the world. JJ was also stubbornly refusing to share the baby’s name until he was born. Emily had attempted the blunt option and informed JJ that as much as she loved her, Emily was not going to help her give birth in the middle of a case because she was too stubborn to stay at home. She used to help her grandfather when some of his cattle went into labour and it was the single most disgusting thing she had ever had to deal with. Dead bodies were nothing compared to when a calf was born fully breech. However JJ was determined that everything would be fine, she would go into labour on her due date and there would be nothing to worry about.
“It would be better to have some sort of plan,” Aaron reasoned. “Especially if she goes into labour early.”
“So what should we do if she goes into labour in the BAU?” Emily asked as she took a seat on the couch and Aaron joined her. Since JJ was reluctant to even consider the possibility, it looked like it would be up to them to have some sort of plan in place.
“Drop everything and get her to the hospital.” Aaron replied as if it was obvious. “I’m driving.”
“I am not sitting in the backseat with JJ on the hospital drive!” Emily protested indignantly. “I’m driving.”
“You’re her best friend and Garcia will be in too much of a panicked or excited state to keep JJ calm; she’ll either freak JJ out or piss her off, neither of which will be helpful. She’ll need someone calm who won’t show any external signs of panic.” Aaron retorted. Emily didn’t say anything. She simply raised an eyebrow and held out her hand to him; a silent but obvious indicator of who he had just described. Himself. “Fine, rock, paper, scissors for it.”
“Deal.” Emily said as they got up and played a quick round. She played Paper. Aaron chose Scissors. “Damn it.”
“You always go for paper.” Aaron reminded her annoyingly. Every time the team had to rock, paper, scissors for something, Emily always chose paper, Morgan and Rossi tended to always choose rock.
“Whatever. Fine, if we’re in the BAU, I’ll ride in the back with her. What about if we’re on a case?” Emily asked; out of all the possibilities, it seemed most likely that JJ would go into labour while they were on an active case. Considering they could wake up in DC and fall asleep that night in Seattle; it was a serious possibility to consider.
“JJ’s been assisting with victimology and handling the press from the precinct, provided one of us is with her; whoever it is can ride in the ambulance with her. The other can call Will and handle the others.” Aaron suggested and at Emily’s look, returned it with a skeptical look of his own. He knew she hated being stuck at the precinct as much as he did. However there were three other factors to consider. “Do you really think Dave, Morgan or Reid could handle JJ in labour.”
“Well Reid has been reading every book on pregnancy and childbirth he could get his hands on,” Emily suggested as Aaron scoffed.
“Yeah but there’s a difference between reading about it and the real thing. Plus we know he’ll be like Garcia; he’ll either panic or be bouncing off the walls.” Aaron reminded and Emily shrugged a shoulder in reluctant agreement. She couldn’t argue with that. Reid was both excited and overjoyed to be a godfather and simultaneously terrified at the concept of pregnancy and childbirth. He still got freaked out when JJ tried to get him to touch her bump as the baby kicked; mainly because of the chestburster scene in Alien. When JJ went into labour, he would either be all but able to deliver the baby by himself or completely lose his mind with worry. There would be no in-between.
“It would be a shame if the two of us were dealing with a suspect and those three had to handle JJ,” Emily remarked sarcastically. “It would probably be the only time a labour involved a brutal triple murder by the labouring mother.”
“Justifiable homicide,” Aaron retorted. “That’s what Haley was told when she almost strangled me when she was in labour with Jack.”
“Nah, that’s just for you in general.” Emily teased. “We’ve made a pact. If one of us kills you, the others will all claim justifiable homicide.”
“Thanks, that just means you’ll deal with JJ and the others on your own when she goes into labour.” Aaron remarked and Emily laughed into her coffee.
“Forgot about that,” Emily joked as they smiled and drank some more coffee. “Did Haley really try to strangle you?”
“Yes. Her epidural took longer than expected to kick in and because I’d rushed straight from the BAU, I still had a tie on. So when the contraction hit, she improvised.” Aaron explained as he absentmindedly rubbed his neck. “Remind me to tell Will to make sure he has nothing around his neck.”
“Will do,” Emily smiled as she considered the obvious one. “What about if she goes into labour on the jet?”
“Then we’re screwed.” Aaron replied simply. He was optimistic that that was the least likely one to happen. Besides, even if it did, they would hopefully have just enough time to get back to Quantico or make an emergency landing somewhere in order to get JJ to a hospital. “Seriously, we could get the pilot to make an emergency landing.”
“I guess,” Emily said. “At least we have some idea of what to do. I bet it happens while we’re away on a case.”
“It’ll happen in the BAU.” Aaron argued. Although JJ was reluctant to start her maternity leave, she had been staying in Quantico on more cases and in an attempt to organise as much of her workload and case files as possible before she actually went on maternity leave.
“$50 and loser buys the winner’s coffee for a month?” Emily offered as she held out her hand. Aaron nodded and shook it.
“Deal.”
Two weeks later.
“How’s the head?” Aaron teased as Emily made her fourth cup of coffee that day. She had spent most of the flight back from Vegas asleep and the rest cursing the city for the extent of her hangover. Even now, he could tell that she was still feeling the effects of it. He hadn't seen her this hungover since the Ambassador's 4th of July party in 1991.
“Shut up,” Emily muttered. All she wanted to do was go home, sleep for about a week and promise that the next time they had a case in Vegas, she was staying in Quantico. Just as she thought that, the bullpen doors swung open and Garcia’s voice reached their ears.
“Ladies and Gentlemen, I am not a doctor, I don’t even play one on TV but I believe young JJ has gone into labour!” Garcia announced as Aaron and Emily exchanged a look, set down their mugs and moved into action.
“Are you alright?” Emily asked JJ who looked pale and terrified as Aaron darted out the doors.
“I’ll get the car,” Aaron called as he got into the elevator and Emily took JJ’s arm, ignoring her comments about calling Will and encouraging her to keep walking. They had more than enough time to call Will, the priority was getting her to the hospital. It was only when they got into the elevator, did Emily remember the bet they had made alongside the plan for when JJ went into labour and she cursed softly.
“What is it?” Garcia asked curiously as Emily shook her head.
“Nothing, I just remembered I now owe Hotch fifty bucks. I bet him that you’d go into labour while we were away on a case. He bet it would happen in the BAU.” Emily replied as the doors opened and they stepped into the main lobby, Aaron had already had the car outside the doors waiting on them. “Doesn’t matter. Come on JJ, let’s go have this baby.”