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It was only June and Andrew was already being placed with his 3rd family of the year. He had low expectations, but when were they high. When he was younger and still had that bounce in his step and a gleam in his eyes perhaps, but he lost both of those years ago. Less than a week later he learned he was right in keeping his expectations low. The woman, his new foster mom, was only doing it for the money and practically ignored him. It could be, and usually was, worse so he wasn’t complaining. He still tried getting out of the house whenever he could.
The first day he just wondered a bit before finding a park next to a giant forest. There was a bench a little ways into the forest where he could sit and see everything going on, but no one would notice him unless they were specifically looking. One day he was watching the kids as usual, and by this point he recognized a lot of them because they were always at the park, when someone sitting on the benches all the way on the other side of the park looked directly at him. The kid seemed like he was as boring to look at as they came. With his black hair and all grey clothing. Yet Andrew knew there was something else about the boy, which was enough to keep his interest. Maybe it was the familiar way the boy curved in his shoulders looking like he was trying to disappear within himself, or maybe it was the small glint Andrew could see in his almost dead stare. Whatever it was had Andrew’s interest and wasn’t going to lose it anytime soon. After glancing around the entire park to not seem like he was staring at the boy Andrew looked towards the bench where the boy had been sitting, but it was now empty. Andrew surprisingly felt a small twinge of disappointment. He wasn’t surprised that the boy was gone, but was surprised he felt anything about it.
A small ‘hey’ disrupted what was likely to be a long and hate filled analysis on the feeling. Andrew turned his head and saw the boy sitting on what he considered his bench. Granted he was sitting as far from Andrew as he could be, but he was still sitting on the bench. Not feeling the need to waste any words Andrew just stared at him. The boy just held the stare before looking towards the park. Andrew studied him a couple seconds before also turning back to the park. He didn’t know how long they’d been sitting in silence before the boy mumbled, “they all get along so well. How?” Andrew just looked at him again. The boy quickly glanced at Andrew when he realized he was being looked at before turning away almost immediately. They sat in more silence for another 5 minutes before Andrew responded with a quiet “there’s no use wondering cause we'll never fully understand” right before he stood up and walked to his foster mother's house.
Andrew continued to go to the park and watch from his bench, but now someone else was watching with him. Some days they would exchange a few words, but mostly they sat in silence and just watched. After almost a week of this the boy finally asked him his name. “Why” was all Andrew felt like saying back.
“So I know what to call you”
“Don’t call me anything”
“I need to call you something”
“No you don’t”
“Yes I do”
Andrew once again just stared at him for that. They barely talked and had no reason to address each other. So why did this boy care. “Only if you give me your name first”
“Why do I need to give my name first I asked you ”
“…”
“Fine. It’s… Luke“
“…”
“…”
“Andrew”
And so it continued for another week. This time though the boy, Luke , would ask questions a lot more. And if Andrew didn’t answer Luke would just huff and look away for a little bit before asking something else. 2 weeks after their initial meeting they were sitting on the bench like usual when Luke let out a small squeak. Andrew glared at him, but Luke didn’t take his eyes off a woman who had just arrived. She was hiding it pretty well but Andrew was able to see a franticness in the way she was looking around the park. Eventually her eyes found the boys and narrowed a bit. Soon enough she was marching over to them and the closer she got the further Luke turned in on himself. As soon as she was close enough to be heard she started talking in a strange accent. She was telling Luke to get up and how they had to go . Luke slowly got to his feet and looking down so the woman wouldn’t see he whispered “goodbye Andrew.”
Andrew went back to the park and back to his bench the day after Luke’s sudden departure with that woman. He knew Luke wouldn’t be there and he would never admit, even to himself, that he hoped he was wrong. The hope grew too strong to ignore entirely so Andrew went to the park less and less as more time passed. Less than a month after that weird day Andrew was back in the system. He’d been in one too many fights. Or maybe the foster mother just got tired of feeling the need to be responsible. Whatever it was Andrew was back where he always was. It was probably one of his shortest stays in the system before a woman named Cass decided to take him in.
Andrew would still think of the boy he had sat in silence with from time to time. But soon that small memory of peacefulness was overwhelmed by everything that started to go wrong. He’d had ‘brothers’ like this before, but never anywhere he wanted to stay. And Andrew wanted to stay with Cass. Staying was never in the cards for him though and soon Andrew went too far and ended up in Juvie.
Juvie gave him more than enough time to think. Andrew would think of all the bad in the world. He’d think of the suffering he’d been through. But he also thought of that little boy. The boy with secrets Andrew would die to know. The boy who Andrew would never see again. Never learn the secrets of.
. . .
Being the first major offense Andrew was only in for a month. Surprisingly Cass was waiting for him when he left. He expected to go straight back into the system because who would ever want to foster a criminal. But there she was with everything still set up for him. Soon Andrew was starting to settle. He was starting to settle down here and it scared him. Andrew would have stayed and settled and been a part of the family if he didn’t receive a letter from his twin brother not long after. If he hadn’t been sent back to Juvie. If so many things hadn’t happened he would have settled and enjoyed being with Cass. He would have suffered through Drake’s final years of highschool, but he would have gotten through it and settled.
It had been years since Andrew had last seen Luke. He had so much bad happen since he could no longer feel the contentment that once came with the memories. Just a vague remembrance that once upon a time he had felt safe with someone. Now he had lost the only family he had cared about. Now he was living with his cousin. A cousin who had also taken in his twin brother after his mother’s ‘accident.’
They were in Germany so Nicky could visit his boyfriend. Andrew didn’t care much about meeting him beyond figuring out if he would do anything to hurt Nicky. After seeing them together for 20 seconds Andrew already had his answer and was bored. So he wondered. Just like so many years ago he wondered until he found a park. There was a bench hidden between some overgrown bushes that Andrew decided would hide himself from view well enough.
Maybe it was the park and the hidden bench. Or maybe it was the way his brain always repeated this memory when Andrew had any free time, but he felt himself, once again, thinking of Luke. Thinking of the only boy who had managed to spend so long in Andrew’s company without being threatened. Without Andrew even wanting to threaten him.
Andrew had been so immersed in his thoughts that he didn’t notice someone was already sitting on the bench he was heading to until he was standing in front of them.
Andrew hadn’t been expecting to find anyone near the bench and now that he had he was mad. Of course he wouldn’t let this person see that so he just stared at them. And they stared right back.
Taken off guard by this unusual response Andrew finally took the time to look at who was on the bench. It was an oddly plain looking guy with blond hair covering part of his face. It looked like the guy was trying to hide behind it or something. Though he was clearly trying to hide and look as dull as possible Andrew was strangely interested in the boy.
Deciding the guy wasn’t worth Andrew's time or effort, he sat down on the bench as far away from the guy as he could get while still sitting on the bench. Andrew tried to ignore him and looked out at the park, but he still felt the guy’s eyes on him. He slid his stare towards the guy hoping he’d look away embarrassed, but he just continued staring at Andrew. Something flickered in the guy's green eyes before he quickly turned away.
It looked like the guy wanted to do nothing more than flee, yet he stayed on the bench giving Andrew plenty of time to observe him. He looked vaguely familiar. Like someone remembered from a dream, or someone who’d aged a lot since you last saw them. Paired with how weirdly comfortable Andrew felt next to him it wasn’t long before he realized who this was.
He wasn’t going to waste words pointing out that they obviously had met before, though. So like they traveled back in time the two boys just sat in silence and watched the people in the park for a couple hours.
After that Andrew would go to the park whenever Nicky wasn’t dragging him and Aaron around the city. Neither of the boys ever said anything. In fact, Luke would barely look at Andrew, probably hoping he hadn’t been recognized.
After 4 days of complete silence and avoidance Luke looked directly at Andrew as he sat down. “ I’m guessing you’ve already recognized me since you’re still coming here. ” Andrew didn’t say anything, but just raised an eyebrow in response.
“Why didn’t you say anything as soon as you recognized me though.”
“Boring. Plus you didn’t say anything either.”
“Still you could ha-“
“And you could tell me who you really are. But I doubt you will.”
Luke just sighed and seemed to be thinking really hard before finally answering “ I- I want to. I really want to, but I’m not allowed. ”
“Allowed?”
Looking a bit uncomfortable Luke quickly backtracked “ I meant could. I would tell you if I could. But I can’t. Because I’ve already told you who I am. Luke. That’s it. ”
“Liar. If you were really ‘Luke’ you wouldn’t be here. With a new eye and hair color no less.”
“I was bored.”
“Liar.”
Luke, or whatever his name was, apparently didn’t have a response so he just looked back towards the park. Andrew wasn’t finished with him though and continued after a couple seconds, “I’m not going to call you Luke, but I need something to call you.”
“I can’t -“
“It doesn’t need to be the one given to you at birth, but it should still be yours.”
It took the boy so long to answer Andrew thought he was just not going to get an answer, but eventually he quietly mumbled “ I guess you could call me Neil. ”
“Neil” Andrew tried out. “Neeeiill.” Andrew said a second time but this time he dragged it out.
“What? I like it.”
“I can tell.” Andrew took a small pause before he admitted, “it’s a good choice.”
After that they went back to watching everyone at the park in silence. Silence until it was dark and Andrew’s phone started ringing. He answered and hung up after listening for a few seconds all without saying anything.
Immediately after hanging up Andrew stood up and just looked at Neil. As soon as Neil got the hint and stood up Andrew started walking without looking to see if Neil followed him.
After a minute of walking in silence Neil caught up to Andrew and asked, “ where are we going? ”
“Dinner.”
“What?”
“We’re going to have dinner. My cousin’s insisting I join him and my brother. While I’m insisting you join me.”
After the silent 10 minute walk from the park, Andrew and Neil were standing outside the diner Nicky had chosen for the night. Andrew walked straight in and Neil only hesitated for a second before following him.
Aaron was facing the door in the booth right inside while Nicky and Erik were across from him. Once Andrew and Neil walked in his face turned from disgust to shock and Nicky must have noticed the change because he turned around to see which in turn made Erik turn to look. Keeping his face blank Andrew led Neil to Aaron’s booth and slid in so he would act as a buffer between Aaron and Neil.
The three were openly staring at the pair, but Andrew didn’t feel it was necessary to fill them in. Nicky was the one to break the shocked silence by asking “Andrew- uhh- who’s this?”
“Neil.”
Figuring he wouldn’t get anymore out of his cousin Nicky decided to try and get information out of the new boy. “So Neil. How’d you meet Andrew? And how did you end up here without any stab wounds? Unless you are stabbed and are currently bleeding out.”
Neil looked a little confused and responded with a question of his own. “ Why would I be stabbed ?”
“Cause he’s Andrew.”
“So?”
“He’s kind of a stabby person.
At this Neil looked at the short boy sitting next to him and tried to imagine him stabbing someone. While he never felt like Andrew was a threat to him, Neil could very easily picture the boy stabbing someone. Not knowing what else to say Neil went back to studying the three in silence.
Never being one to let silence last Nicky once again began pestering Neil. “You never actually answered my question of where you met Andrew.”
“We met at a park.”
“Oh good. It’s not like there aren’t thousands of parks in Germany.”
Knowing Neil wouldn’t correct him Andrew decided to finally speak up, “not in Germany.”
“What do you mean ‘not in Germany’? Andrew did you kidnap this boy from another country.”
“I didn’t kidnap him. He came willingly. Plus we originally met years ago in California.”
“You do realize that clears up absolutely nothing.” Nicky was still trying to get information, but Andrew had said everything he was going to on the subject. Neil could decide what he wanted to tell them from then on.
After a couple more seconds without an answer Nicky decided to try a different approach. “Since I doubt I'll get much more, how about some introductions? So, Neil, you obviously already know Andrew and next to him would be his look alike Aaron. I’m Nicky and the god of a man next to me is my boyfriend Erik.” When he finished Nicky was watching Neil’s expression. Probably judging how he would act learning that two of them were gay and dating.
Neil’s expression barely changed when he responded, “ Nice to meet you guys. ” There was no sign of disgust in his voice. Nothing to suggest he was trying to hide it either. Nicky must have realized it as well when he deflated a bit and somehow managed to look even more casual.
Before Nicky could start a full interrogation a waiter showed up to take their orders. When it got to Neil the boy looked like he wasn’t going to order anything so Andrew took it into his own hands and ordered a burger along with two sundaes and cokes. Neil shot him a small glare, but didn’t argue.
As soon as the waiter left Neil into a conversation by Nicky and Erik joined in shortly after that. Though Neil answered when he was asked something, all his answers were short and, at least to Andrew, obviously lies. After a thorough investigation into Neil’s life their food arrived. Andrew immediately slid a sundae and coke towards Neil while he ripped the burger into two uneven halves. Everyone else at the table is staring at Andrew as he hands the bigger half of the burger to Neil. As Neil obliviously munched on his half, Andrew glared at the others who all immediately looked down at their own food.
Eating gave Neil an excuse to ignore most of the questions thrown his way. He had only taken a couple bites of his melting sundae so Andrew reached over and finished it for him. This caused everyone to stare at them once again, though Andrew’s glare didn’t work as well this time. Aaron finally broke his silence and simply asked Neil, “who are you?”
Looking a bit confused by the seemingly random question he gave the most logical response of just, “ Neil .”
“Yeah I already know your name. I meant who are you really? Why are you in Germany if you met Andrew in California? I doubt it was a coincidence you’re here when we are.”
Neil is just opening his mouth to respond when the doors open and a vaguely familiar woman walks in. It doesn’t even take her a full second to find Neil and start walking towards him. Once she starts over she takes in the fact that he’s sitting with a bunch of other boys his age, and she doesn’t look happy about it. With a quick jerk of her head teling Neil to follow, she leaves the small diner. He just starts debating what excuse to give the boys at the table when Neil notices Andrew giving him a questioning look. He recognized the woman from all those years ago and realized she has to be Neil’s mom.
Not knowing what else he should do Neil just mumbles something about needing to go meet up with his mom. Neil is sliding out of the booth when he feels a tug on the sleeve of his sweatshirt. He looks down just in time to see Andrew’s hand letting go of his cuff to hold out his hand as he says, “Phone.” Slightly confused Neil slides his phone into Andrew’s waiting hand and watches as he punches something in. Once he’s finished he puts the phone directly into Neil’s sweatshirt pocket. Neil leaves before any of the others can start asking questions.
Later that night his mom tries to beat any want of companionship out of him. Even after that Neil takes out his phone and sees that Andrew put his number in. He knows he should never call it and chance putting the closest thing to a friend he has in danger.
It’s only years later that Neil seriously considers calling Andrew for the first time. For the first time in his life Neil is completely alone. So he takes out his phone and makes a call he never thought would happen.