Chapter Text
Shuichi is currently not having a very good time.
And sure, the music is bumping, the food is good, and a bunch of his friends are here, but the girl next to him at the bar just won’t leave him alone. He’d normally rope Kaede or Kaito into giving him an out, but they’re both already with their girlfriends, all rather...busy on the dance floor. Shuichi just smiles, albeit tensely, and hopes the girl will take the hint that he’s really not interested.
Then her hand is on his thigh, and he’s even more uncomfortable. Shuichi looks around, hoping to catch a familiar face in the crowd that’s not preoccupied by locking lips with someone else. To his relief, there’s Gonta, towering above the rest of the partygoers as he awkwardly sways to the music. Shuichi catches his eye and waves him over, trying not to let his desperation show in his expression. He hopes he looks eager enough, otherwise this might not work.
Gonta manages to budge his way through the crowd—repeatedly excusing himself, Shuichi notes with an amused smile—and now stands before Shuichi at the bar. Shuichi yanks his leg out of the girl’s grip and hops up, smile still really forced. Gonta seems to notice, too, which bodes well for Shuichi’s possible out.
“There you are! I was getting worried,” Shuichi says as nonchalantly as he can, but Gonta doesn’t seem to get it, so he turns back to the girl at the bar as he takes Gonta’s hand. Shuichi really doesn’t wanna look at Gonta’s face when he does, either. “This is my boyfriend. I just met—ah, what’s your name?—I just met her a little while ago. You know, while I was waiting for you.”
He emphasizes the last bit by squeezing Gonta’s hand, a silent get me out of here, but Gonta still looks confused. “Uh...Shuichi? What you talking about?” Gonta mumbles, barely audible over the blasting pop music.
The girl looks unconvinced; it’s the opposite of what Shuichi had been hoping for, so he loops his arms around Gonta’s neck and tugs him down into a hug. “She’s making me really uncomfortable by touching me without asking,” he explains in a whisper, and Gonta’s arms wrap around him protectively. “Please just pretend to be my boyfriend for a little while so she’ll leave me alone.”
“Of course,” Gonta tells him quietly, sounding both worried and furious at the same time. Relief floods Shuichi and he smiles, confident that she’ll leave him be now. “No worries, Shuichi, Gonta gonna protect you.”
They pull apart, Shuichi plastering a grin on his face as they do so. He turns back to the girl and tries not to let his distaste show. “Do you mind if he takes your seat?” Shuichi asks as he blinks innocently, and the girl merely grumbles before getting up and storming off. Shuichi lets go of Gonta and slumps back onto his barstool. “Thank you, Gonta. I owe you one.”
“No worries! Gonta just happy he can help,” he chirps, and Shuichi chuckles at how enthusiastic Gonta’s being. His smile fades, though, as he looks towards Shuichi. “Sorry she make you feel uncomfortable. And sorry Gonta not catch on quicker. Gonta not very smart…not really all that observant.”
Gonta says it so honestly, completely different from the way the girl from earlier had attempted to fish for compliments, and Shuichi wonders if that’s really how Gonta sees himself. “Don’t say that, you’re plenty smart,” he says easily, and Gonta’s eyes go wide. “Besides, I'm not very good with expressing my emotions anyway, and it ended up fine, so no harm, no foul.”
Unfortunately, as he says that, it looks like there might actually be harm and/or foul heading his way, because the girl from earlier is now ranting at Kaito and jabbing a finger in their direction. In an attempt to keep the charade believable and keep the girl away from him, Shuichi takes Gonta’s hand again. This, much to Shuichi’s chagrin, doesn’t stop Kaito from coming over towards the bar.
“You said he was single,” he hears the girl hiss, and this night just keeps getting worse and worse. “You didn’t tell me he was gay!”
“He’s not! I’m sure there’s a good explanation for all this,” Kaito tells her, and Shuichi groans as they finally get to the bar. “Yo, Shuichi, since when are you dating anybody? My friend here thought you two hit it off.”
Shuichi looks helplessly at Gonta, who looks equally as uneasy. He prays that Gonta will forgive him for the stupid mess they’re about to be in. “I-I just—we didn’t want to tell anybody yet,” Shuichi attempts, and Gonta gets it rather fast, nodding fervently.
Kaito still looks suspicious, and Shuichi would much rather not have to continue the list of reasons why he doesn’t want to date someone so pushy. So he leans closer to Gonta and cups his cheek, smiling softly. The girl stomps off again in a huff, and Shuichi lets out a sigh of relief. He’s about to let Kaito in on their little game when he’s suddenly being smothered in a bone-crushing hug.
“I can’t believe it! You found somebody all on your own! Cheers!” Kaito booms, and Shuichi has half a mind to chastise him for treating him like a child. Thankfully, Kaito lets him go in order to punch Gonta’s shoulder playfully. “You sly dog, you coulda told me you were datin’ my sidekick! I’m so damn happy for you guys! Oh, wait ’til Kaede hears about this, she’s gonna flip when I tell her I found out before she did!”
He dashes off, presumably to spread the word, and Shuichi would very much like it if the ground could swallow him whole now. Gonta seems equally stunned, cheeks red with embarrassment as he blinks in surprise. They both flinch when they hear a familiar booming laugh and a shriek from across the bar; the void is taking much too long to take Shuichi away.
Kaede bustles up to them, looking rather peeved as she flicks Shuichi’s forehead. “You told space nerd before me?! What happened to ‘When I finally get a partner, you’ll be the first to know,’ huh?!” she demands, and Shuichi cringes. His fingers are still interlaced with Gonta’s, which is the next thing she locks into. She goes from playfully angry to delighted in the blink of an eye. “Oh, it’s Gonta! I’ve always liked you, y’know, such a gentleman, you really do have good taste, Shuichi.”
While positively giddy at the praise, Gonta still looks uneasy, so Shuichi opens his mouth to explain what’s really going on. Just his luck, he’s cut off by Kaito. “Man, you and me have really gotta hit the gym more, Shuichi. You gotta start catching up to your boyfriend,” he teases, and if Shuichi could choose to die right here, right now, he would.
“Shuichi not have to feel like he gotta catch up with Gonta, Shuichi already very strong,” Gonta blurts out, and Shuichi dies a little inside. Kaede and Kaito both direct their attention to him, and he shrinks back. “Ah, what Gonta mean was—!”
“Alright, what’s this I hear about someone getting a boyfriend?” Maki’s voice cuts in, and she freezes as soon as her gaze lands on their joined hands. Then, in a flash, she’s got a knife—where had she even gotten that from?—up to Shuichi’s neck and a glare cutting into his soul. “I swear to God, Saihara, if I hear you broke his heart…”
Kaito hurries to pull her back, and the two of them just smile awkwardly. “You really don’t have to worry about that,” Shuichi tells her. And she doesn’t. Because they’re not dating. “If you guys would just let me explain—”
He’s cut off by a squeal, one that can only belong to Tsumugi. She claps—and she’s brought Rantaro and Kokichi along too, how lovely—and puts a hand on either boy’s cheek. “Oh, you two are just adorable!” she gushes, and Rantaro chuckles; Kokichi looks like he’s thinking, which is never a good sign. “I told you he’d find someone!”
Not entirely sure which one of them she’s referring to and honestly not really wanting to know, Shuichi just nods and tries to explain yet again. “Aw, man, I was hoping I wouldn’t have to see such gross, icky affection tonight,” Kokichi groans, and Shuichi rolls his eyes. “You sure have an...interesting taste in guys, Shuichi.”
“And what’s that supposed to mean?!” he snaps, not wanting Gonta hurt over Kokichi’s usual antics. The purple-haired gremlin in question merely shrugs and orders an exotic-sounding drink. “It doesn’t even matter what my taste in guys is because we’re—”
“In love! They’re totally in love!” Kaede finishes for him. It’s definitely not what he was going to say, but that doesn’t seem to matter to the now growing crowd. Shuichi can pick out nearly all of his classmates. “I can see it on their faces! Just look at him, Shuichi’s got it bad for our bug boy!”
Incredibly embarrassed, Shuichi hurries to correct them, but he can’t get a word in above everyone else clamoring about the two of them, which is really not ideal. “You wanna get outta here?” Gonta mumbles, quiet enough that Shuichi’s fairly certain no one else can hear. “It okay if you not wanna go with Gonta, but he just figure...very loud. Invasive.”
Nodding, Shuichi follows him as he cuts through the crowd, their hands still clasped together. It’s almost comforting. It’s so much nicer outside; cool and calm and the only sounds being that of the cars passing by and a few crickets. “I’m really sorry I dragged you into this,” Shuichi says with a sigh. “I didn’t mean for any of...that...to happen.”
A bit red in the face, Gonta waves him off. “Ah, it no big deal. Shuichi needed help, so Gonta not mind a little misunderstanding,” he says, scratching the back of his neck sheepishly. “Shuichi and Gonta just explain it tomorrow, right?”
“That’s probably a good idea,” Shuichi agrees, and Gonta smiles gently at him. They sit together on a bench, distinctly a bit apart but not to an unfriendly degree. Shuichi’s always liked people-watching, but he groans when he realizes that he recognizes one of the people outside. He takes hold of Gonta’s hand, and the taller boy glances down at him with concern. “It’s that girl again. She’s out for a smoke, I don’t want her to bother me.”
Satisfied with that reasoning, Gonta nods and leans back. His thumb brushes over the back of Shuichi’s hand, but he doesn’t seem to be conscious of the movement. Gonta smiles softly at him, and Shuichi smiles back, though it falls once he realizes that the girl is coming over towards them.
Gonta sees his demeanor change, and pulls him just a bit closer. “Shuichi, you want Gonta to tell her to go away?” he asks, voice deadly serious. Shuichi considers it for a minute, but just shakes his head. She might not be coming over to be rude, after all.
“So...you two are actually dating?” she asks, and before either of them can say anything, she crosses her arms and huffs. “Well...that’s cool. It’s whatever. I just haven’t had a date in, like, two years. My last boyfriend turned out to be gay.”
Not entirely sure why she’s telling them all of this, Shuichi just nods. “Um, Shuichi? Maybe we should head back to dorms now,” Gonta mumbles, and he’s about to agree when the girl continues, this time slightly hysterical. Shuichi suspects she might be a little more drunk than he’d initially thought.
“Y’know, I wish I could be happy like you guys,” she says, her voice wavering. “C-Can you just…? D’you think there’s enough love out there somewhere for me?” Neither of them really know what to say to that, so they stay silent. The girl’s drunken rant continues, and she starts waving her hands in front of her face like she’s going to cry. “You guys just—! You look like you love each other so much, a-and I wish I had something like that! Well? Go ahead and kiss already, why don’t you?!”
She goes from hysterical to huffy in an instant, hands on her hips, and Shuichi looks over to Gonta nervously. He doesn’t really know how to react to that; the most this girl has seen them doing is holding hands, and yet she’s apparently convinced they need to kiss, right here, right now. Shuichi bites his lip and shrinks back under her intense gaze. Maybe they can just do a quick peck and she’ll leave them alone; but how’s he supposed to suggest that to Gonta when she’s right there? Not to mention, to the best of Shuichi’s knowledge, Gonta’s never even dated anyone, and Shuichi’s not about to steal a first kiss from him.
He leans closer, putting a strategic hand on the side of Gonta’s face that’s facing the girl. Gonta’s eyes go wide, and Shuichi prays he’ll forgive him for what he’s about to do. Rather than directly in the center, Shuichi presses his lips to the opposite corner of Gonta’s mouth as briefly as possible. There’s a vague sound of footsteps approaching, but Shuichi figures that’s probably people coming out of the club. As he pulls away, he watches the girl nod, seemingly thoughtful, and walk away, and then his gaze switches to the awed faces of Kaede, Kaito, Maki, and Kokichi. Great, exactly who he didn’t want to have seen that.
“Holy shit!” Kaito shouts triumphantly, and Shuichi knows there’s definitely no getting out of this now. “You two are smackin’ face! Absolutely shameless, bro.” He says the last sentence with a grin, but the teasing tone does nothing to stop Shuichi’s entire face from turning bright red.
Kaede gives him an uncharacteristically wicked grin, and Shuichi ducks his head away, letting his hand fall from Gonta’s equally flushed face. “Oh, come on, don’t be shy, we’re happy for you guys,” she says, and as Shuichi opens his mouth to explain what’s really going on, she tuts. “And now you can’t say it’s not what it looks like because we just saw you two!”
Begrudgingly, Shuichi admits she has a point. He sighs quietly and gives Gonta what he hopes comes across as an apologetic look. Kokichi has slipped away, most likely to spread the word amongst their classmates. Maki heads over to the two of them, her face unreadable and her arms crossed over her chest. It suddenly feels a lot less like a silly misunderstanding and more like Shuichi’s about to lose at least two of his fingers.
“...I’m happy for you two. Don’t break up,” she says simply, a pointed look at Shuichi, and he gulps, hopefully not audibly. “But if there’s too much PDA, I won’t hesitate to kick either of your asses. I don’t want you clogging up the hall in the dorms because you’re too busy making out to move.”
Shuichi feels his ears turn red, and he waves the sentiment off. He tries again to explain, already knowing it’s probably a fruitless effort. “Th-There’s no need to worry about that sort of stuff because we’re not—”
“Aww, they’re still being shy about it! Stuck on the just-out-of-a-crush phase, I see,” Kaede coos, and Shuichi resists the urge to scream at the absurdity of the situation. Will one person please just let him finish a sentence?! “No need to be shy, you two, you can be as affectionate as you want!”
Gonta looks over at him rather timidly, and Shuichi smiles back, hoping his nervousness doesn’t show on his face. It’s Gonta’s turn to try to get through to their bull-headed classmates, though Shuichi doubts his co-conspirator’s attempts will be any more successful than his own. “Gonta not really sure that—”
He’s cut off by a ridiculously loud whooping noise from Kaito, and Shuichi closes his eyes in exasperation. “I can’t believe my sidekick finally found somebody! This is definitely a cause for celebration, dude, let’s head back to the dorms and...I dunno, bake a cake or something!”
“O-Or we could not do that,” Shuichi says quickly, and Gonta looks just as embarrassed as Shuichi feels. Kaito rolls his eyes and yanks on Shuichi’s arm. He’s wrenched away from Gonta as Kaede, Kaito, and Maki start leading him away from the building and in the direction of their campus. “Kaito, really, don’t make a big deal out of this, I promise you, i-it’s really not—”
“It is a big deal, man! Now I can take you and the big guy on double dates with me and Maki Roll! And I can give you super good advice,” Kaito tells him, a determined grin ever-present. Shuichi closes his eyes and sighs. He’s in too deep, and no one will listen to either of them. Over his shoulder, he spots Gonta trying to catch up with them. “Plus, I’m glad my sidekick finally found somebody that makes him happy, y’know? I’m proud of you, bro.”
Shuichi gives him a shaky smile. Well, now he just feels bad. Kaito’s really excited to have this to...bond over, maybe? Whatever the case, Shuichi feels bad for having to pop the bubble. But it has to be done, right? He can’t just let everybody think he’s dating Gonta. That wouldn’t be fair to him or to Gonta. That excited, proud smile on Kaito’s face makes Shuichi second-guess, but it’s out of the question, it’s…
Maybe he can let it drag on a little longer. If only because he’s a sucker for validation. Not too long, though, and obviously he’s not going to if Gonta’s uncomfortable with the idea. Would it really be so bad to pretend to date someone, though? And Gonta’s really nice, he would understand...Ah! What’s he thinking? That’s absurd!
Amidst all of his panicked thoughts, he hadn’t realized how close they’d gotten to the dorms. Shuichi sighs and resigns himself to talk with Gonta tomorrow as he reaches for the handle of the front door, but a much larger hand takes it before he can. Gonta beams at him as he holds the door open for their little group, and it’s only after the rest of them have entered that he comes into the lobby of the dorms himself. Shuichi smiles and shakes his head fondly. Ever the gentleman, that one.
Kaito raises an eyebrow at him and smiles knowingly, but Shuichi honestly doesn’t know what he’s alluding to. Then he nods his head towards Gonta, and Shuichi goes red. He crosses his arms and glares as best he can; the mere notion they’d be doing something like that feels like a slight, especially given Gonta’s innocence in that department. It surprises Shuichi, however, when Gonta steps up next to him and smiles nervously.
“Sh-Should Gonta walk Shuichi to his door?” he asks, and Shuichi just nods, cheeks a bit pink. It’s only a few steps away, but Gonta walks him over anyway. The others stand in the lobby watching their every move, and the two of them walk very stiffly over to Shuichi’s door. Gonta lowers his voice. “I-It felt like gentlemanly thing to do. Um...goodnight, Shuichi.”
The others still watching, Shuichi stands on his toes and tugs Gonta’s tie just slightly so he can whisper without being heard. “Meet me in my room tomorrow before breakfast so we can talk,” he murmurs, pressing a quick kiss to Gonta’s cheek as a cover. Gonta nods and smiles awkwardly at him. “Goodnight, Gonta.”
As he closes the door behind him, Shuichi realizes the gravity of the situation he’s in. Everyone in their class thinks he and Gonta are dating. No need to panic, surely he can come up with something that’ll convince his classmates of the truth behind the surface. A way to tell everyone the exact story, what put him and Gonta into that situation in the first place.
No, no, he can’t do that, Shuichi can’t tell everyone about the pushy girl without Kaito feeling guilty, and he can’t have that. It hadn’t been Kaito’s fault, he couldn’t have known that the girl would be that pushy, so Shuichi can’t have him blaming himself for the predicament Shuichi had been in last night. No, he definitely has to come up with something else.
Maybe he could tell them it was all just one really big misunderstanding. Surely they’d get it then! How would he explain away the ‘kiss’ that Kaito, Kaede, Maki, and Kokichi had seen, though? Surely the news of it must be being spread around like a wildfire because of Kokichi’s involvement. There would also be almost no way to explain why they’d been acting like a couple in the first place without making Kaito feel guilty, and Shuichi had already opted out of giving everyone the objective truth. It also wouldn’t explain why Shuichi had given Gonta a kiss on the cheek before saying goodnight, either.
He really has to think through his actions more thoroughly before he does things.
Another option—his last, really, at least that he can think of right now—is to go through with it. To pretend to date Gonta for a few weeks and then stage an amicable breakup. One that lets him off the hook with Kaito without making him feel bad, and one that hopefully lets him survive Kirumi and/or Maki’s wrath. Both girls are weirdly protective of Gonta, and the last thing Shuichi would want to do is piss either of them off.
He’d have to set up parameters. Specific guidelines on what is and isn’t okay or comfortable between them, which kinds of PDA are fine and which are off-limits. It isn’t going to be easy to get Gonta to agree, given his classmate’s vehement dislike for lying in general, but maybe if Shuichi points out what he’s come up with, then they can work out a solution that’s mutually beneficial.
What is he saying?! This whole thing is absurd! He should just clarify everything and be done with it! The entire idea is scatter-brained and stupid and damn it if Shuichi isn’t just the slightest bit curious as to what it might be like. Gah! No! What?! He can’t think like that, to use Gonta as some kind of experiment is an awful thing to do!
But it’s technically—completely scientifically speaking, obviously—not an experiment. It’s just...a trial run, of sorts. Of what it would be like to date someone. What it would be like to date anyone, really, and see how the class reacts. Most of Shuichi’s ‘relationships’ have either been failed blind dates, the occasional unsatisfying hookup, or the one relatively serious one that ended with Kaede confessing that she’s actually a lesbian. Which, of course, he holds no grudges about, but it’s a little awkward to think his only legitimate relationship had been with someone that wasn’t even attracted to him.
And it’ll be good for Gonta, too! Probably. Somehow. Shuichi still has to figure that out. Maybe Gonta’s need to protect his friends will override the awkwardness, and he’ll want to save Shuichi from whatever fate awaits him by Kirumi and Maki’s hands if they make ending this misunderstanding even a remotely messy affair. Yes, surely he’ll want to make sure Shuichi isn’t affected by things being cleared up, and this idea will ensure that neither of them have to feel guilty about throwing the other under the bus.
Shuichi recaps his options quickly and comes to a conclusion. This is their best option. Pretending for just a few weeks and then ending their ‘relationship’ on amicable terms. No one gets humiliated, no one feels guilty, and everyone can come away without being stabbed. This is definitely the best way to make sure this ends in the best way possible.
So why does he fall asleep that night with a weird feeling in the pit of his stomach?