Work Text:
"If you could date any of the ninja, which one would you date?"
"The green one, obviously."
Lloyd's head snapped up from his desk as fast as lightning, instantly fully awake from any mid class nap he might have been bordering on. Around him, the other ninja also straightened up in their seats and turned their heads to the conversation.
"I mean, really." The girl continued, oblivious to the six students suddenly honed in on her conversation. "There's no competition."
The cheerleader who has proposed the question nodded, body turned in her seat the face the girl sitting behind her. "I guess that is the obvious answer. I mean, he's the leader, and his mech is the coolest, and he's obviously the cutest under that hood."
Lloyd's ears burned as he stared wide-eyed at the conversation continuing before him. His heart hammered in his chest, mouth hanging open. This could not be happening. These were the classmates that bullied and belittled him an a daily basis, and he so did not need to hear about how in love they were with him.
Kai, who sat in front of the green ninja, turned in his seat to grin wildly and wiggle his eyebrows. Jay coughed awkwardly at his left. Lloyd lowered his head back into the crevice of his arms and wished that he was dead.
"What about you, Chen? Who'd you date out of the ninja?"
No. Lloyd's head immediately whipped back up as he turned to stare dumbfoundedly at his biggest bully. Ahead of him, Zane's head turned 120° to watch the conversation unfold.
The head cheerleader's answer was quick. "Green, obviously."
Lloyd swore that he heard Nya snort behind him. This is so not happening right now.
"Aside from the green ninja." The first cheerleader amended.
Chen brought a hand to his chin. "I dunno, I'd have to think about it."
"I'd date the fire ninja!" Kai jumped in enthusiastically. Lloyd turned back around to glare harshly at him, eyes wide and nostrils flaring, hands curled into tight fists at his desk.
"Don't do this," he whispered harshly, but it was obviously far too late to stop it now.
"Nobody asked you." One of the cheerleaders said, casting Kai a half hearted sneer.
"The fire Ninja's the best though! He's got the best fight moves, the coolest hair-"
"Nobody knows what the Ninja's hair looks like, idiot. It's covered by their hoods." Chen interrupted.
"I think the water Ninja's cool!" Nya piped up from Kai's left, leaning over her desk to try and join the conversation. "I bet she'd make a great girlfriend! She's super badass."
Much to Lloyd's horror, the three cheerleaders actually seemed to be taking the conversation seriously, taking a moment to think before one of the girls nodded. "Yeah, I think I'd date the water ninja. She seems down to earth."
"What!" Kai shouted, looking heartbroken as Nya grinned smugly at him. "But the fire ninja!!"
"Forget the fire ninja." Cole butted in, lowering the headphones from his ears and turning in his seat in front of Kai to join in. Lloyd had hopped that Cole had kept his volume too high to hear the conversation- it was certainly loud enough for Lloyd to hear most days, sitting two seat behind him- but it seemed today was just destined to be terrible.
"I think the earth ninja would make the best boyfriend. He's got the sickest tracks." He grinned.
"Oh, like that's all that you look for in a partner." Chen scoffed, but the second cheerleader looked thoughtful.
"The earth ninja is pretty cute." She reasoned.
After sticking his tongue out at an even further dejected looking Kai, he turned to Zane sitting behind him as Kai's left. The ice ninja’s body had turned to match the angle of his head since Lloyd last caught a glimpse of him. "What about you, buddy? Who of the ninja would you date, aside from Green, because he's the obvious answer." Cole drawled out, letting his eyes flicker to Lloyd as he spoke, smile tugging the corners of his lips. The teen sunk lower in his desk, pulling his green hoodie up around his ears.
"Awkward situation detected. Shutting down." Zane's eyes dimmed and he slumped in his seat. Lloyd was envious.
Cole pouted. "Well you're no fun," he muttered to Zane's still body.
"I-I know who I'd date!!" Jay spoke up, raising his arm as if this were a class discussion. Lloyd turned to his left to stare at him, hoping to convey through his glare his feelings of betrayal and the promise of hell to pay later if Jay kept this conversation going.
"Yes, Jay?" Cole asked, humoring the boy's raised hand.
"I'd date the lightning ninja!" Jay proclaimed proudly. Lloyd let his head fall directly onto his desk, not caring for the loud thumping noise it made. "He's like, really brave," Jay continued, heedless of Lloyd's pain. "And he has the only mech that can fly! Other than the green ninja's, I mean, but we're not counting him, so-"
"What's up with Garma-dork," Chen muttered. Lloyd heard the sound of paper ripping and being crumpled up. He didn't even have the energy to brace himself for the paper ball that bounced harmlessly off his head. He wished it was a bullet instead.
"Ooh, think of the romantic dates we could take flying over Ninjago city!" One of the girls gushed.
"No one's mentioned the ice ninja yet, though." The other girl responded, sounding diplomatic and not at all like she was talking about pretend dating any of Lloyd's closet friends. "The ice ninja is so sweet, he'd make an amazing boyfriend!" The girl continued.
"What about you, Lloyd?" The blonde boy slowly raised his head up, locking eyes with Kai as the teen smiled wickedly. "Who of the ninja would you date, aside from the green one? "
"Oohhoh, I wanna hear this one." Cole laughed excitedly, pushing his chair closer to the circle of conversation.
"Oh come on, who even cares about what Garma-dork thinks?" Chen loudly complained, leaning back in his seat with his arms folded behind his head. The other two cheerleaders voice their agreement, wrinkling their noses as Lloyd belatedly straightened up.
"You know, he's right, who cares about my opinion," Lloyd half joked, smiling crookedly but glaring death through his eyes, looking pointedly at each of his friends.
"I care!" Nya gleefully piped up, sitting backwards in her chair and obviously taking immense pleasure from Lloyd's pain.
"Thanks." He replied without inflection. When does this period end?
"I care too!" Jay added, pushing his desk closer to Lloyd's. "Who would you date out of- the ninja." He stuttered.
"No one's chosen the fire ninja yet!" Kai reminded him, pushing closer to the front of Lloyd's desk. "Come on, he's the obvious choice!"
"I bet the earth ninja could rock your world."
"Oh my god." Lloyd brought his hands up to his face, praying to be anywhere else other than here.
"Seriously, since when do we care so much about what Lloyd thinks?"
"Since always, Chen. Back off." Nya shot back, bending over to pick up his earlier piece of crumpled paper that had landed by her desk, tossing it back at him. He jumped at his desk, not expecting the sudden projectile thrown with such force.
Lloyd's heart was warmed by his friend's defence of him, but the high was very short lived as Nya refocused her attention back on him, the evil glint still in her eyes. "C'mon Lloyd, we value your opinion. We wanna know!" She encouraged.
Lloyd glanced longingly at Zane's body. What he wouldn't give to be able to do the same right now.
"Llooooyyyd, answer the question!" Jay pushed, leaning out of his seat to nudge Lloyd's side. "You know you wannaaa!" He sang, crooked smile spread across his face.
"I'd- uh." He spluttered. Four eager faces stared at him expectantly, while the group of cheerleaders seemed to have lost interest in the conversation and switched to texting on their phones. Zane was still powered down.
"Uhhhh...." He continued lamely, mind drawing a blank. What was he supposed to say in this situation? How could he choose between his best friends? How much longer was this class going to stretch for?
Suddenly, like the sound of an angelic chorus, the bell rang, and before any of the ninja could blink Lloyd had his backpack in hand and was sprinting to the door.
"Oh come on!" Kai whined.
"Coward!!" Cole called after the blonde's retreating form as he disappeared out the doorway.
Zane's eyes lit up, and with a whirring sound he straightened back up in his seat as the ninja slid books and papers into their backpacks, grumbling.
"You will all be pleased to know that I have reached a conclusion to your earlier proposed question, Cole. I believe that I would date the ice ninja, were I given the opportunity to meet him and form a relationship." He spoke up proudly, grinning widely.
"Clever answer, buddy." Cole praised, clapping a hand on Zane's shoulder with his backpack slung over his side. "How long do you think until Lloyd talks to us again?" He asked the rest of the team.
"Probably a couple days." Kai mused, standing up.
"We were being a little mean to him." Jay fretted, clutching his backpack to his chest.
Nya waved once as she headed out of the class, smirking proudly. "That was magical. Totally worth it."