An Unlikely Cure
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Schrödinger's Hobbit by Ach-Sss-No (ItsTheBlob)
Fandoms: The Lord of the Rings - J. R. R. Tolkien, The Hobbit - J. R. R. Tolkien
17 Oct 2022
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Summary
"I heard the monster was some kind of frog that cries a lot. Someone told me he'd fed it."
"Fed it?"
"Yes, he said the Ringbearer brought it back with him, and now it's staying in a guest house and it eats raw meat, and it stays in the dark all the time and screams if you open a window to let in the sunlight, and if you bring it water to splash in it'll tell you a riddle. I am certain he invented all of it. He thinks he's quite special now he's an errand boy in the palace. But, as we were telling absurd tales..."
Gollum stepped out into the street behind them. "There was no monster," he said shrilly, "no! No, no- don't talk about things you know nothing about- it is silly! Foolish!"
"I'm sorry?" one of the teens said, turning to blink at him, and another said: "Who are you?"
Gollum had no answer. How could he answer? What would he say? He squirmed, and said gollum in his throat, and turned on his heel to scurry away.
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There was a third hobbit on Mt. Doom that day. But no one likes to talk about that, now do they, precious?(AU. Gollum made a different choice at Cirith Ungol. And, awkwardly enough, he's not dead, somehow, so, uh, now what?)
Series
- Part 1 of An Unlikely Cure
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Free To Good Home by Ach-Sss-No (ItsTheBlob)
Fandoms: The Lord of the Rings - J. R. R. Tolkien
18 May 2025
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Summary
The good citizens of Minas Tirith got to keep one Halfling as a permanent resident after the War of the Ring. They did not get to choose which one, precious.
Latest story: The shape glanced back at her, froze briefly, and went scurrying away around the corner. Devrion caught up with Prestien and grabbed her small hand. “There! He doesn’t know you,” he said, yanking her closer with the roughness of someone who has just almost suffered the escape of a child for whom he has been made responsible. “Now stop telling lies!” He didn’t even think it had really been Sméagol.
Prestien scowled and blinked very fast. “I’m not lying. He must be too busy to stop.”
“You don’t know him. You’ve never met-“ He stopped there because something was very close to him on his left side, a sort of clammy, angry presence. He turned his head, telling himself he was being foolish and nothing was there, dreading what was there and trembling, and too proud to resist looking.
Cold eyes gleamed back at him. “She is not a liar,” a sputtering, shrill voice said, “we is just too busy to stop, that is all, and he is a nasty rude little boy, he is!”
Series
- Part 2 of An Unlikely Cure
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What Lies Ahead by Ach-Sss-No (ItsTheBlob)
Fandoms: The Lord of the Rings - J. R. R. Tolkien
09 Jul 2024
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Summary
After the War of the Ring, Boromir visits the Shire, and brings a friend. While he's there he makes another friend.
Series
- Part 3 of An Unlikely Cure
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Bilbo Baggins Visits His Nephew In Ithilien by Ach-Sss-No (ItsTheBlob)
Fandoms: The Lord of the Rings - J. R. R. Tolkien, The Hobbit - J. R. R. Tolkien
01 Aug 2025
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Summary
AU: Bilbo visits Frodo in Ithilien just after the War of the Ring. And also some other people are there. Unfortunately, everything is different now.
Series
- Part 4 of An Unlikely Cure
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Summary
AU-Roulette submission. Gimli recruits a burglar.
Series
- Part 5 of An Unlikely Cure
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Boromir Goes East by Ach-Sss-No (ItsTheBlob)
Fandoms: The Lord of the Rings - J. R. R. Tolkien
20 Oct 2025
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Summary
Three years after the War of the Ring, Boromir is dispatched East to investigate a message sent from Rhûn, bringing the rehabilitated Halfling Sméagol as his only companion. The journey is long and unsatisfactory, featuring bandits, cursed rivers that give you nightmares, a creepy horse, vengeance-seekers, sudden downpours, harmless misinformation, and fissh.
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Written for ficwip's All Ships Week 2025 (which includes friendships). There's a chapter per each of the week-long series of daily prompts.Series
- Part 6 of An Unlikely Cure