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Tim's hand fidgeted inside his right pocket, brushing against something solid that was the reason his heart was beating so fast.
Normally, he would be the one driving the car, but Brian had insisted this time, so that Tim could enjoy the misty view and cool air that got in through the window. Night was falling in the Woods, the only light ahead was their car's, illuminating the way as the silence accompanied their breaths. The radio was on, but it was low, a faint sound that Tim tried to focus on in order to calm down, but it was to no avail.
He took his hand out of his pocket, deciding it would be best for him to stop playing with whatever was inside, since he truly felt like his heart was about to shoot out of his chest. Brian, of course, wasn't noticing any of this, his gaze fixed in the next turn that left them almost in their front lawn. Their car rides sometimes were like this: quiet and comforting, neither of them felt the need to fill the room with meaningless words, they were more than comfortable sitting in silence, just enjoying each other's presence.
When the car was parked, they entered their small cabin and took off their shoes, stretching and groaning as the warm interior welcomed them. It had been a while since they had been living there, Tim was the first to arrive and installed there until Brian, as if by magic, was brought back to life. It had been quite some time since their relationship had gone back to normal, after Tim helped him remember everything, including the parts he wasn't that proud of. Everything was more stable now, apart from their gruesome missions, they still got to come back to a nice home, to embrace each other each night and drift away to sleep peacefully.
Tim followed his lover to the kitchen, where they leaned against the table calmly, kettle already prepared for some tea. Brian rubbed his sore back.
—Well, could've been worse...—Brian was the first one to break the silence, voice tired from their mission.
—Yeah, this could've been a statistics exam but I'll take the killing anytime over that...—Tim joked, reminding Brian of their times in college.
—You'll never forget that subject, will you? —Brian laughed, elbowing him slightly.
"I'll never forget that you always sat on my right side and held my hand under the table, brushing your fingers against my knuckles", Tim thought, but he didn't say it.
He was reminded of the thing in his pocket again when it knocked softly against the table's side, though Brian didn't notice the sound and just closed his eyes, waiting for the kettle to boil. Tim gulped, a certain red-ish colour arising in his cheeks.
It was stupid, right? He shouldn't be this afraid to ask a question, especially if it was Brian, his lifelong companion, his soulmate even. Still, Tim felt like this was bigger than him, he couldn't bear to look at Brian in the eye right now, his gaze only on the kettle in front of them. But Tim had established a deadline for himself, or else he knew this would never happen. It had to be today, no exceptions.
He was used to facing a lot of things with fear in his heart, but this had to be one of the hardest ones yet. Nonetheless, he sighed, hiding his hand again in his pocket and closed his eyes.
—Do you know what your name means?
The question took Brian by surprise, making him open his eyes and finally face Tim, though his partner wasn't looking at him. He tilted his head in confusion.
—Um... No, I don't think so —He answered, unsure— Why?
Oh god, why did he even ask that? The question was too sudden and weird, Tim thought, this was a bad idea. But he had already said it, right? He passed a hand through his face, rethinking all his life choices and trying to understand why he thought beggining with that question was a good plan.
—Well, um... There's a bit of a debate about the exact meaning —He continued, avoiding Brian's eyes— But one of its meanings is "strong".
Brian paused for a moment, the words sinking in his brain as he nodded. It was quite cool, if you'd ask him.
—That's nice, I do have some mighty biceps... —He joked— Does your name have a meaning?
—It means "honouring God".
—Well, that's not that fun...
—Not really, we have checked by now that there isn't any God...
Fuck, Tim thought, he couldn't let the conversation further from his intentions, or else it would be difficult to continue. He had already messed up, but he needed to fix it.
—What I meant was...—He decided to fuck it and just continue talking— I think it does suit you, like, the meaning of your name. I really like how strong you are, Bri.
There was a familiar warmth spreading through Brian's chest, the very same one he felt in the mornings when he opened his eyes and saw Tim's back rising up and down calmly. It was the same one he felt each time Tim touched him, whenever he made Brian laugh or when they sat in silence in the car. It was the comforting feeling of knowing he was in front of his true love. Brian felt his cheeks get warm and he wanted to reply with a smart remark, but Tim was faster and determined to keep speaking so that he wouldn't cower and hide.
—We've known each other for so long now that I wouldn't know what to do if I didn't have you —Tim continued, taking all the courage he had to finally look at Brian in the eye— I've seen how strong and determined your spirit is and, honestly, I feel like there's no one else in this entire world that could compare to you, birdie.
Brian's lip quivered, but he didn't want to interrupt Tim now that he was finally looking back at him. God, Brian loved when Tim stared at him, and that happened more often than not. He liked being in Tim's mind, having his full love and attention, and he absolutely loved returning it to Tim. His hands moved by themselves when Brian held Tim's, the latter's were trembly but warm.
—You're mean, why do you wanna make me cry? —Brian whispered, a small chuckle escaping his lips.
Tim laughed too, a low sound that relieved the tension in his chest just a bit.
—I just wanted you to know how special you are to me —Tim smiled— I try to show it to you everyday, but it'll never be enough in comparison to how extraordinary you are. I'm glad that life has found a way to let us be together again, because all those times where I was awake but didn't have you by my side were a living hell for me.
He stopped holding Brian's hands, despite never wanting to let go of them, to put one inside of his pocket again. The velvety feeling made his breath hitch.
—I wanted to do something bigger, more special and worthy of someone so dear to me as you are —Tim muttered, a bit ashamed, gaze avoiding him again— But our situation is what it is, and I couldn't bear this need anymore…
—Bear, what on earth are you-
Brian didn't need any explanation, he had it right in front of him, no words needed.
Slowly and shaky, but very sure of it, Tim was lowering himself to the floor.
Tim was kneeling in front of him, hands finally on display as something was trapped between them.
Brian held to the side of the table, afraid his legs would give up on him and make him fall to the ground. One hand covering his mouth, he stood there in disbelief, heart pounding fast in his chest, tears threatening to fall from his eyes. Tim's eyes were also glossy, but his smile was warm and inviting. There was an open box with something shiny inside in his hands.
—Brian Thomas, my birdie, my other half and the strongest, most beautiful soul I've ever met... —Tim whispered, breath picking up— Will you do me the honour of becoming my husband?
That sounded like a sweet melody on a summer's night to Brian's ears. He was unable to speak for a few seconds, just tears flowing endlessly over his cheeks, but he didn't want Tim to worry and think that he wasn't absolutely delighted by the idea, so he just started to nod franctically, causing Tim to finally stand up, knees popping and body aching.
—Yes, Tim, a million times yes! Oh god...—Brian finally exclaimed, his left hand being softly held as a shiny, discreet ring was placed on his ring finger— Fuck, bear, this is-I... I never thought we would be able to…
The confession tugged on Tim's heart, though he too had thought so sometimes, especially when they first started with the missions. But everything was a bit calmer now, more stable, some days it felt like having a normal life, and this was just further proof of how far they had come. Tim kissed the newly placed finger with love, before placing a sweet peck on his lover's lips.
—I know, birdie. I would've liked having a nice celebration, with good food and surrounded by the people we love —Tim sadly whispered, tucking Brian's hand on his chest— I'm sorry I can't give that to you, love.
—Don't be stupid, Tim —Brian chuckled, soflty embracing his husband in a tight hug— I don't need any of that, I got everything right here. I don't need anything but you, my husband, by my side.
They weren't able to sign any official papers, nor throw a big party to announce it, they weren't even able to shop for two different rings—one for engagement, the other for marriage— it was already a miracle Tim was able to save enough while hiding it from Brian. But none of that mattered, they didn't need it to be legal nor "official", it was as real as it got for them, it was enough celebration being in their cozy cabin, warmed up and close to each other, hearts beating in unison. It was unusual and calm, it was just right.
Brian separated softly to take the small, black box from Tim's hands, there was another ring waiting there. He took it and placed it on Tim's left hand, imitating his earlier moves and giving him a small kiss, which was met by a laugh. The shine looked good on them, a comfortable golden piece that neither of them could stop looking at. They laughed awkwardly at their lack of words, but that was nothing a long kiss wouldn't solve.
—You know what?...—Brian started, separating from the kiss just a few inches, arms wrapped around Tim's neck as he stroked his hair.
—Hm, what is it, my dear husband? —Tim sighed content, not caring if he sounded cheesy, the words felt sweet rolling in his tongue.
Brian giggled and nuzzled his husbands neck, a wet kiss being placed right on Tim's jaw, making him shiver.
—We might not have a reception, nor a big celebration but...—Brian continued, kisses descending to Tim's neck.
His partner gripped Brian's shirt, the kisses almost reaching his collarbones, but the fabric on Tim's shirt was obstructing them.
—We can still have a nice wedding night, hm?
The room felt warmer than ever before, teeth clashing in desperate kisses as sweet moans erupted from their mouths, their hearts growing hungrier with lust with each touch. Brian pushed Tim gently to the bed before turning him around and laying on top of him, his chest to Tim's warm back as he pressed down hard. Tim shivered when he felt Brian's lips explore his nape, one of his hands was holding Tim's hip in place, he could feel his lover's erection pressing against his ass.
—I'm gonna make you feel so good, darling...—He mumbled, not really controlling what he was saying, just driven by pure lust— Gotta treat my husband like he deserves, hm?
Tim wished he had an answer to that, but all he could do was moan loudly, head thrown back as Brian hooked his fingers in the waistband of his jeans. He decided to be of use and undid his zipper and button, letting Brian pull them down along with his underwear with more ease. His skin was damp and hot, and he would eventually get naked anyways, therefore Tim decided to take his shirt off too and throw it on the floor. Brian bit his lip at the sight as he tapped on Tim's right cheek.
—Yeaaah, that's what I like to see —Brian commented, hands massaging and playing around Tim's skin.
—Well you're in luck, you get to see it for life...—Tim chuckled, but avoided Brian's gaze, he didn't want to show him how flushed his cheeks were.
The comment went straight to Brian's cock, which twitched trapped in his underwear. He pressed his lips to Tim's spine, leaving a trail of wet kisses that made Tim shake and tremble under him. His own cock was pressed between his stomach and the mattress, so each time he moved a wave of pleasure crashed over him, his tip already making a mess out of the sheets. Brian bit and kissed his lover's ass, enjoying as Tim let out a string of groans that sounded like music to his ears. Using both hands, he grabbed at them, separating just enough. When Tim felt his breath hitting his body, he moaned in anticipation right when Brian buried his mouth between them.
His tongue was an expert at running across each crevice like it knew the exact way to Tim's pleasure. Brian kissed sloppily over the ring of muscle, feeling as it fluttered in pleasure as he held Tim's hips harder, since he was squirming so much.
—O-Oh Brian ngh...—Tim moaned, buring his head on the pillows, embarassed by how loud he was being— D-Don't stop baby, please...
—No worries, bear —Brian smiled, taking a moment to breathe, but never stopping playing with Tim's cheeks— We got the whole night and the rest of our lives.
Brian went back again, this time he too moaned against Tim, it was undeniable how much he enjoyed making his lover feel good like this, putting his mouth to good use. He made out against him, saliva dripping down his chin as Tim's hips stuttered back, unsure if they should shy away from the overwhelming feeling or embrace it and enjoy. Brian's erection was giving him a hard time in his trousers, so even if he could continue for hours, he decided to stop his movements and give Tim a light tap on his ass, gaining his attention. His lustful eyes gave Tim directions, no words needed, they had been doing this for so long that Tim already knew what he had to do.
As he turned around to lay on his back, Brian almost teared his clothes off before patiently kneeling between Tim's legs as he reached for the lube and a condom. He snorted at the sight, Brian's cock was leaking on the sheets.
—Eager, are we? —Tim teased him, passing him what he just took from the bedside table.
—I just really really like you, darling...—He answered, a dumb smile forming in his face.
—Bet you could even cum just by using that pretty mouth of yours, huh?
Brian's eyes rolled back in pleasure. He bit his lip to stay grounded and not loose himself in the thought.
—Fuck, that would be awesome, maybe another time?
—Whenever you want, birdie —Tim smiled, inviting him with his hand to keep going.
Brian opened the lube bottle and warmed some of it in his hands before caressing Tim's ring of muscle once more. It was still dripping from what he did earlier, which made him chuckle.
—Don't think we'll be needing much...—He commented, but still pushed a lubed finger inside of him, very slowly.
Tim exhaled and relaxed against the pillows, closing his eyes as he let himself be pampered by his lover. Brian's finger travelled in and out of him, sometimes curling up just right, making Tim's cock twitch in response. Brian's eyes examined his calm expression, delighted by the fact that Tim was enjoying himself so much. Even if he wasn't to be touched, Brian was sure he would cum hands free just by making his husband feel good, he was just obliging like that. His love for Tim was beyond his own needs. When he put a second finger in, Tim bit his lip, finally opening his eyes and locking them with Brian's.
But as obliging as he was, above all Brian was a tease.
He curled up his fingers more tightly than before, brows furrowed in a fake mock as he felt how Tim practically screamed when he touched his sweet spot.
—Is it there, my love? —He asked, obviously knowing the answer— Does it feel good there, hm?
—Mgh Bri... O-Oh...—Tim exclaimed. Then, he chuckled— You're mean ngh...
—Oh, I'm not mean, bear —Brian laughed, fingers hitting Tim's prostate again— I just wanna make sure I'm doing a good job for my husband. Tell me, does it feel good?
For a moment, Tim wasn't able to speak, the pleasuring sensations too much for his body, so he just nodded franctically. But that wasn't what Brian was asking for, it wasn't fun like that. He continued moving relentlessly as Tim squirmed around, his moans sounding almost pathetically high pitched.
—Say it, baby, don't be shy —Brian demanded soflty— Say "it feels good, birdie"...
—F-fuck...—Tim moaned, gripping the sheets at his sides. He loved when Brian bossed him around— It mgh... It feels a-amazing, birdie...
—"And I deserve how good you're making me feel"
—And I-I...Oh god... I can't Brian mgh...
—C'mon, you can do it, don't keep me waiting... —He pushed, a soft laugh escaping his lips.
Tim felt like he had ascended to heaven. He normally was the bossy one, but it felt nice to be guided and pushed around from time to time, and Brian was damn good at doing it when he put his mind to it.
—I... mgh I deserve how g-good you're m-making me...aah f-feel...
As Brian was satisfied with the response—although he wouldn't have minded continuing making Tim say whatever he wanted— he gave him a nod before pulling his fingers out slowly, finally giving Tim a second to breathe. After rolling a condom on his cock, he lowered himself before pressing multiple kisses to his lover's face, rewarding him for being such a good listener. Then, he scooted closer and looked at Tim in the eye.
None of them moved for a few moments, which they used to stared into eachother's eyes lovingly, hands intertwined right on each side of the pillow. They melted into another kiss, less heated than the previous ones, more tender and slow, one in which they tried to convey without words just how much love they had for eachother. When they separated, Brian lined himself, not moving further away from Tim, just using his hips and knowledge of his lover's body to slowly push himself in.
Tim received it as good as he always did, inviting and warm, wrapping his legs around Brian's hips to push him even further. There was hunger in his eyes, his lips were parted and tinted with a faint shade of red as he felt Brian slide all the way inside of him. Both of them were in desperate need of the other, so Brian didn't hesitate and started moving at a medium pace, he knew Tim could take it, he always did. Their bodies melted and fit perfectly with one another, one sharp and the other soft, more angular or less, but fitting like two puzzle pieces. Brian grabbed at one of Tim's soft pecs, he loved how warm it felt in his hand, as his other pinned Tim's hip in place so he could slide in and out of him with more ease.
—Fuck b-bear...—He groaned, biting his lip as he stared, of course he did, at Tim's expression— You look so ngh... so good like this... All for me...
—Oh mgh...B-Bri...—Tim answered, hands reaching to grab at Brian's biceps, which he held hardly in hopes of grounding himself— It feels s-so good, fuck...
—Yeah? I'm glad to h-hear that —Brian chuckled— I wanna make my husband ngh...cum so good...
If he kept talking that sweetly then it would come sooner than later, Tim thought, but his mind was too far away to verbalize it. Brian noticed it and went back down again to kiss him, this time their tongues dancing with the other, moans escaping each time they gasped for air. Tim needed just a bit more, so he looked at Brian as his eyebrows furrowed, eyes locking with his husband's as he bit his lip.
And, as always, Brian understood perfectly. He always did.
Brian held Tim's hands—his eyes inevitably catching the shine of their new rings—and pinned them each right by Tim's face. Then, his pace picked up, hips smashing against Tim's with a nice, deep rythym, skin slapping against skin and echoing through the room, Tim's moans becoming louder and higher. Brian couldn't help but smile when Tim's eyes rolled back, he knew what was happening, and whene he looked down between their bodies he confirmed it.
—Fuck Brian, mgh o-oh...—Tim moaned, shaking under him— I'm c-c...oh shit...
—I know, I know baby, fuck...—Brian breathed, hips still moving— Come for me, bear...
Thick ropes came out of him and splashed against their stomachs, covering everything. And still, Brian didn't dare stop, nor did he slow down his pace. Tim's body was warmer than before, looser and calmer, but his moans weren't dying out. Brian kissed him before kissing their intertwined left hands, placing his lips right on top of their rings.
—You can give me another one, right baby? —He mumbled against Tim's knuckles, hips rocking back and forth with ease— Pretty please?
Even if Tim wasn't able to speak yet, his answer was clear. He nodded franctically, eyes rolled in pleasure as broken whines came out of him acompannying his trembling body.
—Of course y-you can mgh...—Brian groaned, hips almost stuttering— You're perfect aah... You take it s-so well...
—Brian...—Tim exclaimed, voice broken and mind fuzzy— B-Brian mgh...
—You know, I actually mgh... I haven't asked y-you though...—Brian reflected, a smirk on his lips.
Tim looked a mixture of confused and lustful, his eyebrows were furrowed but he never stopped moaning and squeezing Brian's hands. His lover gave him a quick kiss on the forehead.
—Do you wanna m-marry me, bear? —He softly whispered, right by Tim's ear, before he tilted Tim's hips upwards slightly, achieving a new, deeper angle.
He was hitting Tim right in his prostate, the waves of pleasure that came to him almost unbearable but he didn't want Brian to stop. His voice broke as he moaned louder than before, tears of excitement prickling at his eyes.
—Fuck, oh my god! —Tim shouted, hands grasping at anything he could, being Brian's body or the sheets around him— Mgh o-oh Brian ngh...
—C'mon, don't leave me hanging baby...
—B-Brian...o-oh ngh... I do, I do, I d-do Brian, shit, I do...—He repeatedly moaned, his body finally giving out and cumming once more, splashing them even more than before— I do, baby, I do...
That's all Brian needed to hear to be tipped over the edge, his own orgasm coming at him with full force, hips finally coming to a stop as his whole body shivered. Tim held him through it, his hands caressing him slowly to help him come back to his senses, though both of them felt like they had just ascended to heaven. They only panted when Brian pulled out and discarded the condom into a nearby bin, neither of them able yet to even talk. It wasn't until Brian had finally cleaned their stomachs from the mess and had embraced Tim in his arms that they felt with enough strength to talk.
—I love you, bear...—Brian whispered, his voice barely audible against Tim's hairline, which he kissed— I'm so thankful that I get to call you my husband now, that's all I've ever wanted...
Tim felt like all his suffering wasn't in vain. He closed his eyes and felt how warm Brian's chest was, how the ring on his finger brushed against his back from time to time as he caressed it. He nuzzled onto him, not wanting to let go of the feeling and, thankfully for him, they had just unofficialy signed for it to be everlasting.
—I love you too, birdie, forever and ever...—Tim whispered back, his heart steady as he slowly drifted to sleep on his husband's chest.